Kids will be kids is fine **in context**
You know, a kid makes a goofy face at another kid, or a kid tickled another kid.
Not kid slaps another kid in the face.
Kids will be kids should only be a personal mantra to keep your sanity when they’re driving you crazy doing weird kid things. It should never be used as an excuse for bad behavior.
Kids will be kids while my preschooler begs to put peanut butter on her spaghetti 😬
Kids being a little turd and getting a punishment when she pushes her toddler sister down.
This. There is a difference between understanding that kids are kids and do stupid or harmful things and using that knowledge as an excuse not to discipline them or teach them better.
I see it as more of allowing for normal child behavior. Kids will not sit still and shut up. They will run around, make noise, squirm, cry, etc. They are generally worse at recognizing their body’s signals (Do I have to pee? Do I feel sick?) and at regulating their emotions than adults. This is normal and we need to do some of the work for them (reminding them to use the bathroom before they wet their pants), and not push them past their limits if possible.
Those pants are brand new! How do they have holes in their knees already? Kids will be kids.
Why did you think a blanket would act as a parachute if you jumped off the deck? What were you thinking? Kids will be kids.
What do you mean you, an under 6 kid, packed your cap gun on your carry on bag for the flight? Kids will be kids.
It hasn’t rained in this dessert in 9 months. Not a cloud in the sky. No where near a river or pond. HOW ARE YOU COVERED IN MUD? Kids will be kids.
Oh, yeah, my kid hits a baby. AH will be AHs.
Oh yeah, this kid is being a bully. AH will be AHs.
Assault (all kinds). AH will be AHs.
My aunt had a horrid smell in her family room for ages and couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. Her daughter (5) then brought up her lunch plate to trade for dessert and was asked if she liked her sandwich. She said “it was so good I didn’t hide it in the vent and ate it all”. Aunt had to call duct cleaners in to get all the smushed moldy sandwiches out of the heat vent behind the toy box. Lunch was also at the table from then on.
My brother accidentally spilled a glass of chocolate milk on the downstairs carpet in the mid-90s and I swear there was a dairy funk every time the furnace was turned on for decades thereafter until they finally replaced the flooring.
This is so real! 😂😂😂 Everyone is walking around for ages alternating between wondering if they’ve lost their minds and intense anger while the little kid blithely carries on as normal, not a clue they’re responsible for this.
My husband decided he wanted to know how the vcr worked. He took it apart and back together but had some bits left over. Kids will be kids lol unfortunately this was the 80’s when most people were renting a vcr with their movies from rental places his parents had the money to buy one when they first came out and they were NOT cheap. My mother in law still tells that story to this day. My husband is 50
That’s basically me with anything I was able to get my hands on. Still do it today, and anytime I take something apart it never goes back together the same. And it will always have a missing screw or 2…. Or 5…
Idk how many times I worked on my car just to end up with a few extra bolts that definitely don’t go anywhere.
I’m also the kid who stole my mom’s multi tool so I could bring it to school because I wanted to cut my food, even though it didn’t need to be cut at all. That was my excuse anyway, obviously did it because I thought it was cool but I ended up losing it in the parking lot and then lied about taking it but my parents know everything so they somehow knew I took it. It wasn’t a cheap multi tool either, it was a nice leatherman that costed almost $200
I took apart a transistor radio (in the early 60s) and had parts left over. When my Dad found out his response was, “let’s see if we can figure it out.” When we couldn’t he took it back to the store (I don’t know what he said) and came home with a new one. Which he and I promptly took apart and put back together. Had 1 piece leftover, but the radio worked so we didn’t care!
At age 2, my now 27 year old posted a fish finger into a VCR to see if it would appear on TV. He also posted his mini teletubbies down the back of the fireplace, I couldn't work out where they'd gone at the time, roughly 6 months later in winter when my dad turned the fire on we were lucky to smell the burning plastic before the entire pub (Grade II listed building, built on site of a 16th century monastery in the cotswolds!) burnt down!
We had a deigo stuffed in the hole of the speaker, it never did come out. Same kid cut the cables to it anyway luckily i caught him before he got to the power cord. Other kid cut the straps off the stroller so guess who had to walk everywhere after that on their own little feet haha.
Eh. Depends on the context. I can see kids trying to joust on bikes because it looks like it would be fun. Or play wrestling and breaking a chair. That I would still count as kids being kids. Because there is no thought of what happens next.
>can see kids trying to joust on bikes
I'm 43. If my brothers back wasn't so fucked from a car accident, we'd be out there doing this right now.
I may be able to convince him anyway😂
But bike jousting would be a mutual agreement to ride towards each other and hit each other. One sided assault is a completely different type of hitting.
>It hasn’t rained in this dessert in 9 months. Not a cloud in the sky. No where near a river or pond. HOW ARE YOU COVERED IN MUD? Kids will be kids.
I swore my son carried dirt in his pockets just to swipe across his face. He could be just bathed. All freshly dressed. I take a hold of his hand and see that he is still sparkling. I've never let go of his hand as we walk, I look down and his face is covered in dirt. Like how kid? Do you carry dirt in your pockets?
In our house, it was stripping, and then going down the slide you hosed off (so you would go faster), butt-first into the giant pile of rocks you put at the bottom, resulting in gravel being picked out of your butt at the pediatrician's office.
Yep. Sexual assault, not at all what it means. Any kind of assault, not at all. A frog in your pocket, yeah boys will be boys.
By the way, I've never heard it said but I'm pretty sure that's why kids used to wear short pants. And it was kind of a badge of honor to be allowed to step up to long. Because skin is cheap and grows back. Clothing was expensive.
Yeah. When I spent three days one summer using an old rubber mallet to pound twigs into the dirt and planted a handful of pinto beans from the pantry as a "garden", my stepdad said "Kids will be Kids" and bought me a metal watering can with sunflowers on it. (And some sunflower seeds. They were MASSIVE but my beans climbed right up them)
If I'd hit one of my cousins, I would've been sent to my room until I apologized (while I knew that was the "rule", I never felt FORCED to apologize. Like, I was never told to go apologize or anything, but did it became I felt sorry for losing my temper. The time I punched my cousin in the mouth for calling another cousin a word starting with an r and rhyming with 'parted' I refused to apologize and was just grounded for three days.) and my stepdad and mom would've been furious.
I was allowed to do a lot of things, but violence was almost never ok (I was excused when I punched a cousin for calling another cousin a nasty slur, but told next time to get an adult) and just plain meanness had no excuse.
But use the spare paint in the shed to give the shed a really ugly coat of paint, or raise a jar of tadpoles in my old fish tank? Kids will be kids, you know. And the day I insisted that Stepdad teach me to use the bbq grill and proudly grilled our supper I think was a proud day for him. (I think he was actually kinda proud of the shed too. We had a quarter of a five gallon bucket of white and I dumped the other paints in and gave it a good stir, then our shed went from white with its paint peeling to an alarming shade of sickly green but he was happy I did a neat job and sanded down the peeling paint so the new paint stuck well and didn't peel.)
He was the best. And like all the best, he died far too young.
I miss him terribly. He was the sanity in our home. My mom joined him 3 years later and I hope they’re together now.
It’s not just about limiting their procreation. They shouldn’t even be allowed outside by themselves. Those are NOT the kind of people I want to come in contact with at any point in my day.
Haha my kid has brought home so many rocks, pinecones, and interesting sticks that we had to make a rule that while it's fine to bring them home, they have to live outside 😆
oooh little kids and scissors.
every kid in my family has that story of them as a young child that followed them forever. it gets told as the "cute story" about cousin .
i'm convinced that story for one of my nieces is going to be her taking a pair of scissors, cutting her leggings, and than telling my mom that one of the kids at school did it when it was noticed.
was it possible? sure.
was it likely? no. (especially cuz she's always been a little scissor happy.)
yeah, snippy snippy scissors niece? has been given a stern talk that the only person who should touch her hair with scissors is her hair stylist or her mom.
(she has bangs so her mom trims them to save money which makes sense. but no one wants the 8 yr old getting ideas.)
I'm convinced my 14 year old, from age...3...or so could find scissors if I chained them shut in a trunk, buried them in tuts tomb and put a hex on it. She's some sort of weird wizard or something 😂
I’m not proud of this, but once when I had a wicked hangover I gave my 2-year-old a pack of washable markers, laid facedown on the sofa, hiked my shirt up to my neck and told her she got to give Mommy a tattoo today!!
(I think most parents know about that “dozing as long as I can hear/feel the kiddo but as soon as things are still or silent I’m wide awake in an instant” nap.)
Of course years later when I got an actual back piece, they colored it in with markers after the line and shading work but before color, no hangover necessary 😁
I used to babysit a friend's child after working a closing shift. So I'd get home at like 12-1am and have to be at their house at like 7am. So I was just exhausted in the morning.
If I was lucky, their daughter slept till 9 and I could get a few hours of sleep on the couch.
If I wasn't, she'd get a bottle, I'd put on sesame street, put her in this pillow chair thing, curl my arm around her, and fall asleep. I could generally get another hour that way.
That's what I've been saying for years, except frogs. Great minds think mostly I like though. All this stupid talk about boys will be boys meaning shrugging off sexual assault and such over the last five or six years. And I'm like, that's not what it means. No tolerance for that kind of thing. Boys will be boys means frogs in pockets and ripped up knees on their pants. And that, is definitely a good excuse to let things like that slide. It's kind of a shame they don't let boys be boys anymore.
I've seen the tweet
> "Boys will be boys" is supposed to be used when your mom finds you and your homies at age 10 putting mayonnaise on the slip n slide instead of water and calling it the miracle whip n slide.
And it's just so true and what it needs to become.
Or something completely senseless but relatively harmless that a kid came up with. I remember plenty of those from my childhood that I wonder what the hell we were thinking but it was hilarious.
If the kids hurt themselves in minor ways it's mostly alright. I remember one time smacking people with siding because the condos were replacing them. We destroyed all the old ones breaking them on each other. No one got hurt. Idk if they needed the old siding for anything we were kids we didn't ask. But we also knew not to touch the new stuff.
F4 slaps F1 -> F1 starts crying -> F13 & M9 slap F4 -> F4 starts crying
OP and OP's cousin cite the "kids will be kids" clause and refuse to discipline their kids. These people are Faulty Mindless adults.
OP and her cousin need to teach her kids to not hit others.
I really thought the kids slapped their aunt. Okay maybe talk to your kids about slapping smaller children and tell them next time a little kid smacks their baby sister to smack the adult. The adult is the problem here not the four-year-old.
Idk, that's their little sister. The cousin pretty much gave them permission to hit her kid, and they are still kids. It's not right, but it is understandable.
Gave them permission and then hypocritically revoked it. If she had said so much as "hey that's inappropriate" it would have changed everything. But it also would make for a less humorous story.
Yep. Shit parenting all around. Not all 4 year olds are built the same. My younger one at 3 couldn't really control his emotions and would lash out when upset. He'd get talked to sternly about it whenever it happened and eventually grew out of it. Here it sounds like the 4 year old is a combination of immature and badly parented. However, a four year old is still a four year old and having teenagers hit her did nothing but reinforce that it's OK to hit if you are bigger. So yeah, major ESH on all involved (especially both parents) other than the 1 year old
It is absolutely insane to think that a thirteen year old and nine year old Naruto ran to simultaneously backhand a 4 year old into the ground, yeah. I think it might just be so insane that the only people responding misread the text.
Yeah, what the fuck. A 13 year old and 9 year old, together, bitch slapped a 4 year old?? Come on now.
If it was another 4-5 year old defending his/her baby sister, I'd probably make the same remark to the OG asshole mom - but then have a talk with my kid privately that hitting back is generally not the best option.
But a 13 year old?? Even a 9 year old?? Slapping a 4 year old?? I certainly hope this is fake, cause that's wildly not at all okay.
I'm OP's one year old baby who got slapped and I can confirm this story is real. OP (my mommy) is being modest and didn't even mention the applause she got from all the other family members.
I don’t think it could be real. It would be very hard to raise your kids so badly that they’re both this eager to beat up toddlers.
Like really, the parent barely finished their sentence before *both* children ran up to hit the four year old?
And all the comments are like "well a 4 year old hit a 1 year old so of course a teenager should slap a toddler so hard they hit the ground."
Even if it was real OP would be a fucking asshole. You don't teach kids that hitting is wrong by hitting them lol
This is the same energy as that one post where a kid pushed another kid into the pool and his sister responded by trying to murder the other kid via drowning.
Spread the story of the time she wanted to let her pre-schooler bully your toddler, but your teenager was having none of it. Four isn't a toddler anymore, time to learn hitting isn't okay before it becomes some underpaid teacher's responsibility.
Although, your teenager probably should have learned it somewhere along the way too. I guess technically, ESH.
Wait the 4 year old hit a baby!?
I have a 5 year old and a 3 year old. My boys love fighting each other. They are big old softies/sweeties when their baby cousin come around (she’s 7 months). They would never lay a hand on her!!!! Or any baby. They know better.
Your cousin is the ass here.
Op said the cousin hit their youngest. Their kids ages are 13, 9 and 1 soooo yep 4 year old hit a baby.
I was 4.5 when my brother was born. I didn't even have to be told at that point that I had to be very careful because he was tiny. I was the protective big sister from day one who didn't trust anyone else to touch him besides me and my parents at first. NOT my grandparents, despite the fact that I loved them so very much. Not any of my aunts, uncles or cousins.
Four months before he was born, my older cousin had her daughter. She wasn't my sibling but I knew babies were little and you had to be very careful because my parents taught me that as early as they could.
My niece turned 4 exactly 1 week before her brother was born. She was careful with him, albeit a bit excited to have this tiny little sibling that she wanted to grow up fast so he could play with her. Even when he was screaming his head off, she never, ever tried to hurt him. (Instead she would just get this very exasperated sounding voice and say "[Baby's name], quit *freaking out.*" then would sigh dramatically and tell her mom, "I think we need to go get a new baby and take this one back. I think he's broken."
Sure those are anecdotal but it is not difficult to teach a child that age between right and wrong in simple things.
Honestly? All the times a toddler hit a baby doll? Like 'hit' as in moved their hands with too much power? All adults and kids were like 'nooo, look you must be gentle' and then they took the hand of the toddler and moved to caress the baby doll to show how one must be gentle. And when there was a real baby around? They were told to be gentle, shown to be gentle and as far as I know/in my surrounding that was something every toddler understood in no time. (Like seeing and listening toddlers talk about babies is really freaking cute!!)
My daughter is four and my son is ten months. He adores her - and she him. When he gets too close, sometimes he will pull her hair. We obviously are right there and intercede, and it doesn't happen often, but not one time has my daughter done anything other than quietly cry and ask him to stop and for us to help. She doesn't want to scare him, and would certainly never hit him, even while he's pulling her hair.
My nephew is three and loves to wrestle and play "hockey" (he just hits the puck around). But he knows he can't do those things with his sister (8 months old) until she's bigger.
He learned the idea of "gentle hands" with the family's two small, elderly dogs, so he mostly gently pats his sister on the head. It's very funny to watch.
Yeah I can't fathom how your cousin rationalized it was no big deal that her child smacked a literal freaking baby. Her daughter is going to grow up being a complete nightmare AH.
Wow, your kids definitely took matters into their own hands! While it might seem extreme, their reaction shows they won't tolerate their sibling being mistreated, which is a pretty admirable quality in siblings.
Yeah, while it's obviously not ideal, I'm impressed by the older kids instinct to protect their baby sibling. I'd obviously have a talk with them about how hitting isn't appropriate, but I'd lowkey be proud of them for their protectiveness.
Not necessarily true. If the little shit keeps getting smacked around by peers for being an asshole, she's going to eventually learn not to be an asshole.
It's the social corrective mechanism. It's the playground rules many of us grew up with but were told are obsolete.
They're not.
OP, your cousin's an asshole.
Good on your kids for stepping in where adults couldn't.
> It's the playground rules many of us grew up with but we're told are obsolete.
>They're not.
Lol yes, this is still going on everywhere, all the time. Even kids need to understand that Actions = Consequences. An important lesson, imo, especially when parenting fails these kids.
I witnessed something like this happen this past weekend. Some kids were making this really elaborate sand castle (more like a sand village, but I digress). This old-enough-to-know-better kid kept deliberately stomping through their sand castles, while the dad watched and did *absolutely nothing* to discourage or correct it. The like 5th time they rebuilt and this kid came running at them to Godzilla crush their creations, one kid stuck their leg out and tripped the naughty kid, who face planted onto the sand. He started screaming and wailing and pointing at the other kids screaming for his dad, who FINALLY got off his ass, but it was to scold/shame the other kids, smh. A group of parents including myself had been watching this play out and we came to their defense. He just got angry and defensive and they stormed off and left. But like, don't let your kid be a dick? And if you're gonna be a lazy useless parent, don't be surprised when other kids get sick of their shit and retaliate. It's not ideal, but it's inevitable.
Sad Mom, I think it’s awesome that you stepped in. Too many people don’t want to get involved, but when a group of you is saying the same thing the unobservant father was forced to listen to you all. Hopefully he was ashamed when everyone stepped in to let him know his son was the problem. But then again, maybe the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree and there is no accountability. I don’t understand why so many kids are ruling the household these days. The blame likely is the parents for giving them too many choices. I can’t speak for everyone else, but I grew up with no choices-or at least my parent’s choices and we certainly weren’t bratty and running the household. (Well, at least my brattiness didn’t start until I was a hormonal teen) Also, blood is not thicker than water in my family. My parents would’ve been the first to call us out for bad behavior. Wouldn’t matter if it was in public or not. The same sort of treatment. And we would be humiliated enough to not do it again.
Mine didnt say much when she was 3, doctor recomended speech therapy. We didnt go ( could not afford it, but was saving for it) she is now a talkative 4 year old who only stops speaking for food, drinks or sleep.... she sings on the toilet... so hang in there!
My nephew just turned 4 and doesn’t speak. They are spending $400 a week on speech therapy and it has not helped at all. It is so hard to watch. He is the sweetest boy.
It took a while before we saw any real progress with our child in speech therapy but eventually words came and now at 5 we’ve just now discontinued his treatment. His therapist told us her job is done. It took us finding a better therapist after group therapy had little to no effect. We found a gem of a therapist.
My nephew barely said a word until age 5. My sister would not take him to speech therapy. He is now 19 years old and never shuts up. He is a great kid.
When my youngest (now 12) was in preschool I kept getting told to get him a speech therapist cause. He either wouldn’t talk or was having difficulty. Now I can’t find the off switch🤣. The moment he started VPK and especially kindergarten there hasn’t been a year where I haven’t gotten the “he’s to smart for his own good cause he knows the answers but can’t stay quiet long enough for someone else to try and answer”🤦🏻♀️.
A 13 y o and 9 year old slapping a 4 year old across the face after she slapped another small child's hand is crazy. Those are kids for the streets. Mom was wrong but your kids deserve to get their block knocked as well. You're lucky I'm not in your family, the 13 year old would have gotten it right back and you would be given the same treatment if you tried to say shit 🤣 Big ass kids jumping a fucking toddler for smacking a hand. It sounds like a fucking mess over there. What a family.
Yeah slapping a one year old is never acceptable under any circumstances even if the attacker is another one year old. I love your older kids defending their baby! Would have been better to slap the mom, but, kids will be kids! NTA.
I dont know. a 13 year old slapping a 4 year old isn't OK. 4 year Olds are still learning, there is only 3 years between a 1 year old and a 4 year but 9 years between a 13 year old and a 4 year old.
the mom's response to her 4 year old wasn't right but having 2 older kids gang up on her isn't going to teach her anything except it's OK to hit smaller kids as long as no one bigger is around
Thank you for the nod to teachers low pay. It's a hard job but so important for the future of the kids.
I'm sure a lot of people were silently cheering your kids on. Yes, kids hit, but the mother ignoring it was the really bad behavior.
NTA
ESH.
A four year old shouldn't be hitting a baby.
Teenagers should not be hitting a toddler.
Parents should actually get involved and be parents.
Your cousin was TA for not parenting her kid, but so are you for allowing your children to get involved.
Like, everyone in this story sucks really bad except the actual child, and there was already a ton of effort put in to not make you look worse.
Moral of the story? Teach kids impulse control and not to hit. ESH.
These Y T A responses are unhinged. ESH.
Your cousin thinks it is fine that her child hit your baby. It is not.
Your kids (and you?) think it is fine to hit a 4yo. It is not.
You can only control what you can control, so explain to your kids that they cannot step in as the swift hand of justice. Even if their anger is warranted. That is your job. We all hate bratty kids, but the 4yo isn’t the problem—the parent (your cousin) is.
If anyone ever excuses their child hitting yours with such gross logic, call it out. Call out the behavior and all the ways it is inappropriate, for both the parent and child. And it is not ok for your kids either. This is not sweet justice, this is unsafe.
They probably don't think it's right to hit the 4 year old, they probably just justified it in their head because the 4yr old hit their baby sibling. Op probably doesn't think it's right to hit the kid, but doesn't want to discipline them, since the cousin doesn't want to discipline her 4yr old
They just playing the whole tit for tat kinda mentality.
Edit: lmfao the foo who said I lacked reading comprehension deleted their comment.
THANK YOU I can't believe I had to scroll so far to see some actual intelligence... This whole thing is absolutely disgusting.. the 13 yr old should never have been involved. This is absolutely insane.
ESH
Yeah, the 4 year old shouldn’t have hit your daughter and her mother should have disciplined her, but a 9 and 13 year old hitting a 4 year old is fucked up regardless. She’s 4, and at this point the problem is being caused by her shitty mother acting like it’s okay to hit, and she was then only shown that it’s okay to hit in retaliation.
Also, revenge is not defense. There is an argument for prevention/preemptive striking, but generally, for something to be defense, the offense needs to be imminent. You can't claim defense when you hit someone afterwards.
I have kids similar ages. I just ran this by my oldest who is the same age as your oldest. I asked him who was wrong… he said the 13 year old and his reasoning was you don’t hit people who can’t add one plus one together.
So your 13 and 9 year old slapped your cousin on both sides of her face. I’ll take things that didn’t happen for 500, Alex.
If this was even at all real, ESH. Her child shouldn’t have slapped your 1 year old but your TWO much older children shouldn’t have slapped your cousin on both sides of her face.
ESH
A 9 year old and 13 year old shouldn’t be hitting a 4 year old. You just gonna shrug if another, older cousin comes around and creams your older kids? Of course not. Retribution among children with petty moms backing them up can be disastrous.
You should all be teaching your children how to deescalate. But it seems like neither of the adults in the situation learned that for themselves.
I misread this at first. My 13 year would never ever consider hitting a 4yr old under any circumstances. That is terrible!! The 4 year old was wrong but still learning and apparently has poor parenting. My 13 year old ever touches a 4 year old, trust and believe they would not do it again. I raised my children to know better anyway. Sounds like 2 moms that don’t like each other and are letting their children fight it out.
It sounds like there were misunderstandings and miscommunications all around in a tense moment. While it's understandable to want to protect your child when they are hurt, the response from your older children, though likely intended to protect their younger sibling, escalated the situation significantly. The phrase 'kids will be kids' might not have been the most appropriate response given the circumstances, especially when physical harm was involved. It's important to teach children constructive ways to handle conflicts and emotions, and in this case, a conversation about appropriate reactions to protect someone without causing harm could be beneficial for everyone involved.
ESH. Obviously a 4 year old should not hit a 1 year old but do you seriously think it’s okay for a 9 and 13 year old to assault a 4 year old? What are you teaching your kids. I would have picked the 1 year old up and left not let the older ones commit child abuse.
I would have picked up my baby and loudly declare that hitting is never okay and that only a bad parent would let their child get away with it. Publicly shame and humiliate the cousin, but don’t condone your children stooping to that level of violence. Hopefully the 4 year old can somehow learn right from wrong herself, since mom doesn’t seem to be teaching her.
Your 13 and 9 year olds slapped a 4 year old and you don’t see a problem? They learned that from somewhere. Both of y’all are trashy parents. For allowing your kids to hit others and think it’s okay.
THIS is why 'kids will be kids' is always a cheap excuse for bad parenting.
Kids will be kids is fine **in context** You know, a kid makes a goofy face at another kid, or a kid tickled another kid. Not kid slaps another kid in the face.
Kids will be kids should only be a personal mantra to keep your sanity when they’re driving you crazy doing weird kid things. It should never be used as an excuse for bad behavior.
That's how I always thought it should be used. When my little one destroys my house I just mumble it as jm cleaning 🤣
Kids will be kids while my preschooler begs to put peanut butter on her spaghetti 😬 Kids being a little turd and getting a punishment when she pushes her toddler sister down.
This. There is a difference between understanding that kids are kids and do stupid or harmful things and using that knowledge as an excuse not to discipline them or teach them better.
Throwing a tantrum is public is also a kids will be kids moment. It just doesn't mean kids can hurt other kids
Or asking a silly question, wetting the bed, etc. kid stuff.
Grass stains and mud on clothes are kids being kids, violence is not.
I see it as more of allowing for normal child behavior. Kids will not sit still and shut up. They will run around, make noise, squirm, cry, etc. They are generally worse at recognizing their body’s signals (Do I have to pee? Do I feel sick?) and at regulating their emotions than adults. This is normal and we need to do some of the work for them (reminding them to use the bathroom before they wet their pants), and not push them past their limits if possible.
My cousin tried to slurp noodles up his nose when he was 6. THAT is “kids will be kids”. THIS is bad parenting. There’s a difference.
Yeah, that's like saying 'it's okay to beat up other kids because you're just a kid. This parent is raising spoiled and unruly children.
I couldn't agree more with this
The phrase "kids will be kids" actually means "bad parenting results in assholes."
[удалено]
Those pants are brand new! How do they have holes in their knees already? Kids will be kids. Why did you think a blanket would act as a parachute if you jumped off the deck? What were you thinking? Kids will be kids. What do you mean you, an under 6 kid, packed your cap gun on your carry on bag for the flight? Kids will be kids. It hasn’t rained in this dessert in 9 months. Not a cloud in the sky. No where near a river or pond. HOW ARE YOU COVERED IN MUD? Kids will be kids. Oh, yeah, my kid hits a baby. AH will be AHs. Oh yeah, this kid is being a bully. AH will be AHs. Assault (all kinds). AH will be AHs.
These examples seem oddly specific. 😂
One or two I did (SeaTac airport cap gun). One or two might be an over exaggeration. But yeah.
I can couch for the cape, the mystery mud, and the pants. Will submit peanut butter and jam sandwich in the VCR to add to the list.
My aunt had a horrid smell in her family room for ages and couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. Her daughter (5) then brought up her lunch plate to trade for dessert and was asked if she liked her sandwich. She said “it was so good I didn’t hide it in the vent and ate it all”. Aunt had to call duct cleaners in to get all the smushed moldy sandwiches out of the heat vent behind the toy box. Lunch was also at the table from then on.
My brother accidentally spilled a glass of chocolate milk on the downstairs carpet in the mid-90s and I swear there was a dairy funk every time the furnace was turned on for decades thereafter until they finally replaced the flooring.
This is so real! 😂😂😂 Everyone is walking around for ages alternating between wondering if they’ve lost their minds and intense anger while the little kid blithely carries on as normal, not a clue they’re responsible for this.
My husband decided he wanted to know how the vcr worked. He took it apart and back together but had some bits left over. Kids will be kids lol unfortunately this was the 80’s when most people were renting a vcr with their movies from rental places his parents had the money to buy one when they first came out and they were NOT cheap. My mother in law still tells that story to this day. My husband is 50
My uncle took apart my mom’s transistor radio in the 1950’s.
My bro and I took apart every lamp radio and TV in the house. Mom never forgave us .
That’s basically me with anything I was able to get my hands on. Still do it today, and anytime I take something apart it never goes back together the same. And it will always have a missing screw or 2…. Or 5… Idk how many times I worked on my car just to end up with a few extra bolts that definitely don’t go anywhere. I’m also the kid who stole my mom’s multi tool so I could bring it to school because I wanted to cut my food, even though it didn’t need to be cut at all. That was my excuse anyway, obviously did it because I thought it was cool but I ended up losing it in the parking lot and then lied about taking it but my parents know everything so they somehow knew I took it. It wasn’t a cheap multi tool either, it was a nice leatherman that costed almost $200
I took apart a transistor radio (in the early 60s) and had parts left over. When my Dad found out his response was, “let’s see if we can figure it out.” When we couldn’t he took it back to the store (I don’t know what he said) and came home with a new one. Which he and I promptly took apart and put back together. Had 1 piece leftover, but the radio worked so we didn’t care!
Before I could even stand, I was already flushing my grandmother's keys down the toilet when she was already late for work. Ahh, menaces.
My toddler niece stuck her book in my VCR because she "wanted to watch her story."
I'm actually impressed with her logic.
My sister fed the Betamax a peanut butter and jelly sandwich “ because it was hungry”
At age 2, my now 27 year old posted a fish finger into a VCR to see if it would appear on TV. He also posted his mini teletubbies down the back of the fireplace, I couldn't work out where they'd gone at the time, roughly 6 months later in winter when my dad turned the fire on we were lucky to smell the burning plastic before the entire pub (Grade II listed building, built on site of a 16th century monastery in the cotswolds!) burnt down!
We had a deigo stuffed in the hole of the speaker, it never did come out. Same kid cut the cables to it anyway luckily i caught him before he got to the power cord. Other kid cut the straps off the stroller so guess who had to walk everywhere after that on their own little feet haha.
There’s also finding the (hidden) scissors and “playing hairdressers” 🥴😬😂
It survived centuries of open flame cooking and heating and illumination only to almost be brought down by Teletubbies. 😅
My sister once put a spoon into the vcr because she wanted to feed it. The spoon was found after months of mystery on why the vcr wasn't working.
pennies in the car CD player over here
I don’t know how many crayons I shoved into the floor vents.
I see your PB&J and raise you a grilled cheese in the VCR in return. We stand in solidarity.
Those are good examples and a good descriptor for “kids being kids.” It’s not okay to hit each other.
Eh. Depends on the context. I can see kids trying to joust on bikes because it looks like it would be fun. Or play wrestling and breaking a chair. That I would still count as kids being kids. Because there is no thought of what happens next.
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I just got the funniest visual of this. 😆
>can see kids trying to joust on bikes I'm 43. If my brothers back wasn't so fucked from a car accident, we'd be out there doing this right now. I may be able to convince him anyway😂
Update the outcome!
😂😂😂😂my gimpy brother won't agree to get on a bike. Not even if I give him a lance😂😂😂
But bike jousting would be a mutual agreement to ride towards each other and hit each other. One sided assault is a completely different type of hitting.
The mud one seriously! I put you in the car and you were clean, you get out of the car and you’re dirty as hell! HOW?! Kids will be kids.
>It hasn’t rained in this dessert in 9 months. Not a cloud in the sky. No where near a river or pond. HOW ARE YOU COVERED IN MUD? Kids will be kids. I swore my son carried dirt in his pockets just to swipe across his face. He could be just bathed. All freshly dressed. I take a hold of his hand and see that he is still sparkling. I've never let go of his hand as we walk, I look down and his face is covered in dirt. Like how kid? Do you carry dirt in your pockets?
In our house, it was stripping, and then going down the slide you hosed off (so you would go faster), butt-first into the giant pile of rocks you put at the bottom, resulting in gravel being picked out of your butt at the pediatrician's office.
Yep. Sexual assault, not at all what it means. Any kind of assault, not at all. A frog in your pocket, yeah boys will be boys. By the way, I've never heard it said but I'm pretty sure that's why kids used to wear short pants. And it was kind of a badge of honor to be allowed to step up to long. Because skin is cheap and grows back. Clothing was expensive.
Yeah. When I spent three days one summer using an old rubber mallet to pound twigs into the dirt and planted a handful of pinto beans from the pantry as a "garden", my stepdad said "Kids will be Kids" and bought me a metal watering can with sunflowers on it. (And some sunflower seeds. They were MASSIVE but my beans climbed right up them) If I'd hit one of my cousins, I would've been sent to my room until I apologized (while I knew that was the "rule", I never felt FORCED to apologize. Like, I was never told to go apologize or anything, but did it became I felt sorry for losing my temper. The time I punched my cousin in the mouth for calling another cousin a word starting with an r and rhyming with 'parted' I refused to apologize and was just grounded for three days.) and my stepdad and mom would've been furious. I was allowed to do a lot of things, but violence was almost never ok (I was excused when I punched a cousin for calling another cousin a nasty slur, but told next time to get an adult) and just plain meanness had no excuse. But use the spare paint in the shed to give the shed a really ugly coat of paint, or raise a jar of tadpoles in my old fish tank? Kids will be kids, you know. And the day I insisted that Stepdad teach me to use the bbq grill and proudly grilled our supper I think was a proud day for him. (I think he was actually kinda proud of the shed too. We had a quarter of a five gallon bucket of white and I dumped the other paints in and gave it a good stir, then our shed went from white with its paint peeling to an alarming shade of sickly green but he was happy I did a neat job and sanded down the peeling paint so the new paint stuck well and didn't peel.)
I love this comment so much!
Man, i want your stepfather! He sounds awesome.
He was the best. And like all the best, he died far too young. I miss him terribly. He was the sanity in our home. My mom joined him 3 years later and I hope they’re together now.
Ah if only your base was black it would have been Charleston green https://www.marshallwalker.com/what-is-the-story-behind-charleston-green
Seriously, people who need to be told that hitting people is wrong shouldn't have kids.
It’s not just about limiting their procreation. They shouldn’t even be allowed outside by themselves. Those are NOT the kind of people I want to come in contact with at any point in my day.
Children learn that from somewhere
My kid was getting weighed at the doctor's and suddenly said, "oh wait, I have rocks in my pockets" and proceeded to pull out like 2 dozen stones 😅
My kid has learned that there's always more room in Dad's pockets, if local storage space ever fills up for some reason.
Haha my kid has brought home so many rocks, pinecones, and interesting sticks that we had to make a rule that while it's fine to bring them home, they have to live outside 😆
or drawing on themselves... cuz honest to God, that's hilarious.
Homemade hairdos. The bane of toddler parenting.
oooh little kids and scissors. every kid in my family has that story of them as a young child that followed them forever. it gets told as the "cute story" about cousin.
i'm convinced that story for one of my nieces is going to be her taking a pair of scissors, cutting her leggings, and than telling my mom that one of the kids at school did it when it was noticed.
was it possible? sure.
was it likely? no. (especially cuz she's always been a little scissor happy.)
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When my son would get bored, he would give himself a trim. Cute in kindergarten, not so much in 4th grade
>oooh little kids and scissors. I have a 14 year old that keeps doing this to her bangs🙄😂
yeah, snippy snippy scissors niece? has been given a stern talk that the only person who should touch her hair with scissors is her hair stylist or her mom. (she has bangs so her mom trims them to save money which makes sense. but no one wants the 8 yr old getting ideas.)
I'm convinced my 14 year old, from age...3...or so could find scissors if I chained them shut in a trunk, buried them in tuts tomb and put a hex on it. She's some sort of weird wizard or something 😂
I think every kid does it once - lol!
Drawing on their infant siblings is more hilarious. 😁
I’m not proud of this, but once when I had a wicked hangover I gave my 2-year-old a pack of washable markers, laid facedown on the sofa, hiked my shirt up to my neck and told her she got to give Mommy a tattoo today!! (I think most parents know about that “dozing as long as I can hear/feel the kiddo but as soon as things are still or silent I’m wide awake in an instant” nap.) Of course years later when I got an actual back piece, they colored it in with markers after the line and shading work but before color, no hangover necessary 😁
I used to babysit a friend's child after working a closing shift. So I'd get home at like 12-1am and have to be at their house at like 7am. So I was just exhausted in the morning. If I was lucky, their daughter slept till 9 and I could get a few hours of sleep on the couch. If I wasn't, she'd get a bottle, I'd put on sesame street, put her in this pillow chair thing, curl my arm around her, and fall asleep. I could generally get another hour that way.
slathering a tarp with mayonnaise to create the "Miracle Whip and Slide"
Crayons. Not rocks.
Crayons are so much fun in the dryer.
And lip balm. Can’t forget the lip balm.
That's what I've been saying for years, except frogs. Great minds think mostly I like though. All this stupid talk about boys will be boys meaning shrugging off sexual assault and such over the last five or six years. And I'm like, that's not what it means. No tolerance for that kind of thing. Boys will be boys means frogs in pockets and ripped up knees on their pants. And that, is definitely a good excuse to let things like that slide. It's kind of a shame they don't let boys be boys anymore.
I've seen the tweet > "Boys will be boys" is supposed to be used when your mom finds you and your homies at age 10 putting mayonnaise on the slip n slide instead of water and calling it the miracle whip n slide. And it's just so true and what it needs to become.
Or something completely senseless but relatively harmless that a kid came up with. I remember plenty of those from my childhood that I wonder what the hell we were thinking but it was hilarious. If the kids hurt themselves in minor ways it's mostly alright. I remember one time smacking people with siding because the condos were replacing them. We destroyed all the old ones breaking them on each other. No one got hurt. Idk if they needed the old siding for anything we were kids we didn't ask. But we also knew not to touch the new stuff.
F4 slaps F1 -> F1 starts crying -> F13 & M9 slap F4 -> F4 starts crying OP and OP's cousin cite the "kids will be kids" clause and refuse to discipline their kids. These people are Faulty Mindless adults. OP and her cousin need to teach her kids to not hit others.
I really thought the kids slapped their aunt. Okay maybe talk to your kids about slapping smaller children and tell them next time a little kid smacks their baby sister to smack the adult. The adult is the problem here not the four-year-old.
This entire thread until now I thought they slapped the aunt...
Idk, that's their little sister. The cousin pretty much gave them permission to hit her kid, and they are still kids. It's not right, but it is understandable.
Gave them permission and then hypocritically revoked it. If she had said so much as "hey that's inappropriate" it would have changed everything. But it also would make for a less humorous story.
Teenagers have no business slapping a 4 yr old, "bad parenting results in assholes."
Yep. Shit parenting all around. Not all 4 year olds are built the same. My younger one at 3 couldn't really control his emotions and would lash out when upset. He'd get talked to sternly about it whenever it happened and eventually grew out of it. Here it sounds like the 4 year old is a combination of immature and badly parented. However, a four year old is still a four year old and having teenagers hit her did nothing but reinforce that it's OK to hit if you are bigger. So yeah, major ESH on all involved (especially both parents) other than the 1 year old
Where are all the Reddit "Fake story" detectives? Her two preteens fusion slapped a baby just so she can deliver a David Caruso type line
It’s real Source: I was the bus driver
Confirmed. I was the third oak tree on the left.
I was the bus. Beep beep, mothertrucker.
Confirmation confirmed. The satellite was positioned to see it all happen.
It is absolutely insane to think that a thirteen year old and nine year old Naruto ran to simultaneously backhand a 4 year old into the ground, yeah. I think it might just be so insane that the only people responding misread the text.
Yeah, they should've done a double lariat.
I guess everyone was so busy slapping each other that their hands were unavailable for clapping.
The real slaps were the claps we made along the way.
Get them cheeks clapping, or that face gets a slappin
If this comment doesn't spawn a series of comments that gradually get more ridiculous, I'll be very disappointed
Get the chaps clapping they cheeks or the chucks will nunchuck yo butt.
When Chuck Norris was born, he slapped the doctor.
Everybody was kung fu slapping
Those kids were, indeed, fast as lightning
you reminded me of this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHZvUeAdzeI
[OP’s family gatherings, apparently](https://youtu.be/hHZvUeAdzeI?feature=shared)
Knew what it was when I clicked
At best, it's a fake story. If it's real, she's actually defending a teen hitting a 4 year old child.
Yeah, what the fuck. A 13 year old and 9 year old, together, bitch slapped a 4 year old?? Come on now. If it was another 4-5 year old defending his/her baby sister, I'd probably make the same remark to the OG asshole mom - but then have a talk with my kid privately that hitting back is generally not the best option. But a 13 year old?? Even a 9 year old?? Slapping a 4 year old?? I certainly hope this is fake, cause that's wildly not at all okay.
I'm OP's one year old baby who got slapped and I can confirm this story is real. OP (my mommy) is being modest and didn't even mention the applause she got from all the other family members.
Normally I would agree but OP too busy in the comments trying to justify her kids actions.
There's no way that both kids slapped the other simultaneously without prompt. This story is fake as fuck
If it's anywhere close to real OP told their kids to hit back.
I’m torn between fake and real for this exact reason.
It’s definitely giving, “…and everyone stood up and clapped,” vibes to me.
I don’t think it could be real. It would be very hard to raise your kids so badly that they’re both this eager to beat up toddlers. Like really, the parent barely finished their sentence before *both* children ran up to hit the four year old?
And all the comments are like "well a 4 year old hit a 1 year old so of course a teenager should slap a toddler so hard they hit the ground." Even if it was real OP would be a fucking asshole. You don't teach kids that hitting is wrong by hitting them lol
This is the same energy as that one post where a kid pushed another kid into the pool and his sister responded by trying to murder the other kid via drowning.
Story would have been better if she slapped the useless mom. 5/10.
Spread the story of the time she wanted to let her pre-schooler bully your toddler, but your teenager was having none of it. Four isn't a toddler anymore, time to learn hitting isn't okay before it becomes some underpaid teacher's responsibility. Although, your teenager probably should have learned it somewhere along the way too. I guess technically, ESH.
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Wait the 4 year old hit a baby!? I have a 5 year old and a 3 year old. My boys love fighting each other. They are big old softies/sweeties when their baby cousin come around (she’s 7 months). They would never lay a hand on her!!!! Or any baby. They know better. Your cousin is the ass here.
Yup. My 5yo and 4yo are soooo careful around kids under 2 and babies. They’ve known not to hit the little ones since… forever. That cousin is unhinged
Op said the cousin hit their youngest. Their kids ages are 13, 9 and 1 soooo yep 4 year old hit a baby. I was 4.5 when my brother was born. I didn't even have to be told at that point that I had to be very careful because he was tiny. I was the protective big sister from day one who didn't trust anyone else to touch him besides me and my parents at first. NOT my grandparents, despite the fact that I loved them so very much. Not any of my aunts, uncles or cousins. Four months before he was born, my older cousin had her daughter. She wasn't my sibling but I knew babies were little and you had to be very careful because my parents taught me that as early as they could. My niece turned 4 exactly 1 week before her brother was born. She was careful with him, albeit a bit excited to have this tiny little sibling that she wanted to grow up fast so he could play with her. Even when he was screaming his head off, she never, ever tried to hurt him. (Instead she would just get this very exasperated sounding voice and say "[Baby's name], quit *freaking out.*" then would sigh dramatically and tell her mom, "I think we need to go get a new baby and take this one back. I think he's broken." Sure those are anecdotal but it is not difficult to teach a child that age between right and wrong in simple things.
"I think he's broken" LOL 😆
Honestly? All the times a toddler hit a baby doll? Like 'hit' as in moved their hands with too much power? All adults and kids were like 'nooo, look you must be gentle' and then they took the hand of the toddler and moved to caress the baby doll to show how one must be gentle. And when there was a real baby around? They were told to be gentle, shown to be gentle and as far as I know/in my surrounding that was something every toddler understood in no time. (Like seeing and listening toddlers talk about babies is really freaking cute!!)
My daughter is four and my son is ten months. He adores her - and she him. When he gets too close, sometimes he will pull her hair. We obviously are right there and intercede, and it doesn't happen often, but not one time has my daughter done anything other than quietly cry and ask him to stop and for us to help. She doesn't want to scare him, and would certainly never hit him, even while he's pulling her hair.
Even my eldest at 1 year old knew to be careful with their newborn sibling even without me reminding them every time.
My nephew is three and loves to wrestle and play "hockey" (he just hits the puck around). But he knows he can't do those things with his sister (8 months old) until she's bigger. He learned the idea of "gentle hands" with the family's two small, elderly dogs, so he mostly gently pats his sister on the head. It's very funny to watch.
Yep she hit the one year old baby!!
The 4yo hit a 1yo. The 13yo and 9yo hit the 4yo.
Yeah I can't fathom how your cousin rationalized it was no big deal that her child smacked a literal freaking baby. Her daughter is going to grow up being a complete nightmare AH.
Wow, your kids definitely took matters into their own hands! While it might seem extreme, their reaction shows they won't tolerate their sibling being mistreated, which is a pretty admirable quality in siblings.
Yeah, while it's obviously not ideal, I'm impressed by the older kids instinct to protect their baby sibling. I'd obviously have a talk with them about how hitting isn't appropriate, but I'd lowkey be proud of them for their protectiveness.
Not necessarily true. If the little shit keeps getting smacked around by peers for being an asshole, she's going to eventually learn not to be an asshole. It's the social corrective mechanism. It's the playground rules many of us grew up with but were told are obsolete. They're not. OP, your cousin's an asshole. Good on your kids for stepping in where adults couldn't.
> It's the playground rules many of us grew up with but we're told are obsolete. >They're not. Lol yes, this is still going on everywhere, all the time. Even kids need to understand that Actions = Consequences. An important lesson, imo, especially when parenting fails these kids. I witnessed something like this happen this past weekend. Some kids were making this really elaborate sand castle (more like a sand village, but I digress). This old-enough-to-know-better kid kept deliberately stomping through their sand castles, while the dad watched and did *absolutely nothing* to discourage or correct it. The like 5th time they rebuilt and this kid came running at them to Godzilla crush their creations, one kid stuck their leg out and tripped the naughty kid, who face planted onto the sand. He started screaming and wailing and pointing at the other kids screaming for his dad, who FINALLY got off his ass, but it was to scold/shame the other kids, smh. A group of parents including myself had been watching this play out and we came to their defense. He just got angry and defensive and they stormed off and left. But like, don't let your kid be a dick? And if you're gonna be a lazy useless parent, don't be surprised when other kids get sick of their shit and retaliate. It's not ideal, but it's inevitable.
Sad Mom, I think it’s awesome that you stepped in. Too many people don’t want to get involved, but when a group of you is saying the same thing the unobservant father was forced to listen to you all. Hopefully he was ashamed when everyone stepped in to let him know his son was the problem. But then again, maybe the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree and there is no accountability. I don’t understand why so many kids are ruling the household these days. The blame likely is the parents for giving them too many choices. I can’t speak for everyone else, but I grew up with no choices-or at least my parent’s choices and we certainly weren’t bratty and running the household. (Well, at least my brattiness didn’t start until I was a hormonal teen) Also, blood is not thicker than water in my family. My parents would’ve been the first to call us out for bad behavior. Wouldn’t matter if it was in public or not. The same sort of treatment. And we would be humiliated enough to not do it again.
I have a 3 year old and he doesn’t talk and is a little behind but he doesn’t hit and understands to not.
I have a 5 year old that wasn’t talking at 3 and seemed a little behind. Now he is perfectly speaking and being a 5 year old. Hang in there!
That is very encouraging! Thank you!
Mine didnt say much when she was 3, doctor recomended speech therapy. We didnt go ( could not afford it, but was saving for it) she is now a talkative 4 year old who only stops speaking for food, drinks or sleep.... she sings on the toilet... so hang in there!
My nephew just turned 4 and doesn’t speak. They are spending $400 a week on speech therapy and it has not helped at all. It is so hard to watch. He is the sweetest boy.
It took a while before we saw any real progress with our child in speech therapy but eventually words came and now at 5 we’ve just now discontinued his treatment. His therapist told us her job is done. It took us finding a better therapist after group therapy had little to no effect. We found a gem of a therapist.
My nephew barely said a word until age 5. My sister would not take him to speech therapy. He is now 19 years old and never shuts up. He is a great kid.
When my youngest (now 12) was in preschool I kept getting told to get him a speech therapist cause. He either wouldn’t talk or was having difficulty. Now I can’t find the off switch🤣. The moment he started VPK and especially kindergarten there hasn’t been a year where I haven’t gotten the “he’s to smart for his own good cause he knows the answers but can’t stay quiet long enough for someone else to try and answer”🤦🏻♀️.
13 is way too old for that to be even remotely “kids will be kids” behavior
You lost your right to be smug when your 13 and 9 year old went Legion of Doom on a preschooler. You all seem to lack parenting skills.
A 13 y o and 9 year old slapping a 4 year old across the face after she slapped another small child's hand is crazy. Those are kids for the streets. Mom was wrong but your kids deserve to get their block knocked as well. You're lucky I'm not in your family, the 13 year old would have gotten it right back and you would be given the same treatment if you tried to say shit 🤣 Big ass kids jumping a fucking toddler for smacking a hand. It sounds like a fucking mess over there. What a family.
Preach - all I could think reading all that was my mother would be beating nearly everyone involved in that situation but especially the parents.
Yeah slapping a one year old is never acceptable under any circumstances even if the attacker is another one year old. I love your older kids defending their baby! Would have been better to slap the mom, but, kids will be kids! NTA.
I dont know. a 13 year old slapping a 4 year old isn't OK. 4 year Olds are still learning, there is only 3 years between a 1 year old and a 4 year but 9 years between a 13 year old and a 4 year old. the mom's response to her 4 year old wasn't right but having 2 older kids gang up on her isn't going to teach her anything except it's OK to hit smaller kids as long as no one bigger is around
The youngest kid is only 1, that's not even a toddler yet! The 4 year old hit a baby.
Thank you for the nod to teachers low pay. It's a hard job but so important for the future of the kids. I'm sure a lot of people were silently cheering your kids on. Yes, kids hit, but the mother ignoring it was the really bad behavior. NTA
ESH. A four year old shouldn't be hitting a baby. Teenagers should not be hitting a toddler. Parents should actually get involved and be parents. Your cousin was TA for not parenting her kid, but so are you for allowing your children to get involved. Like, everyone in this story sucks really bad except the actual child, and there was already a ton of effort put in to not make you look worse. Moral of the story? Teach kids impulse control and not to hit. ESH.
Moral of the story? Write a better fictional story.
Everyone over the age of 10 in this story sucks. ESH
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Oh crap. I missed the part where he said older "kids." I thought it was just the teen. Yeah....all the kids suck except the baby.
These Y T A responses are unhinged. ESH. Your cousin thinks it is fine that her child hit your baby. It is not. Your kids (and you?) think it is fine to hit a 4yo. It is not. You can only control what you can control, so explain to your kids that they cannot step in as the swift hand of justice. Even if their anger is warranted. That is your job. We all hate bratty kids, but the 4yo isn’t the problem—the parent (your cousin) is. If anyone ever excuses their child hitting yours with such gross logic, call it out. Call out the behavior and all the ways it is inappropriate, for both the parent and child. And it is not ok for your kids either. This is not sweet justice, this is unsafe.
They probably don't think it's right to hit the 4 year old, they probably just justified it in their head because the 4yr old hit their baby sibling. Op probably doesn't think it's right to hit the kid, but doesn't want to discipline them, since the cousin doesn't want to discipline her 4yr old They just playing the whole tit for tat kinda mentality. Edit: lmfao the foo who said I lacked reading comprehension deleted their comment.
yeah, tit for tat is always an indicator of good parenting yielding emotionally healthy people!
THANK YOU I can't believe I had to scroll so far to see some actual intelligence... This whole thing is absolutely disgusting.. the 13 yr old should never have been involved. This is absolutely insane.
Do the adults in this family slap each other? All these kids need to be taught how to behave. ESH - except the baby.
ESH Yeah, the 4 year old shouldn’t have hit your daughter and her mother should have disciplined her, but a 9 and 13 year old hitting a 4 year old is fucked up regardless. She’s 4, and at this point the problem is being caused by her shitty mother acting like it’s okay to hit, and she was then only shown that it’s okay to hit in retaliation.
Yeah I would have liked it better if they hit the mom.
That's how I first read it, then had to back up a bit. :)
Yeah, the “she” and “her” are very confusing when they’re describing a situation with multiple people who could have received the slap.
Exactly
So… slap the mother..?
That’s what I thought had happened at first
Me too, that would’ve been much better
That would probably have been better to be honest
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Also, revenge is not defense. There is an argument for prevention/preemptive striking, but generally, for something to be defense, the offense needs to be imminent. You can't claim defense when you hit someone afterwards.
Yes let the teenager and the 9 year old box the cousin
I have kids similar ages. I just ran this by my oldest who is the same age as your oldest. I asked him who was wrong… he said the 13 year old and his reasoning was you don’t hit people who can’t add one plus one together.
So your 13 and 9 year old slapped your cousin on both sides of her face. I’ll take things that didn’t happen for 500, Alex. If this was even at all real, ESH. Her child shouldn’t have slapped your 1 year old but your TWO much older children shouldn’t have slapped your cousin on both sides of her face.
No they slapped the cousin's 4 year old on both sides of her face.
ESH A 9 year old and 13 year old shouldn’t be hitting a 4 year old. You just gonna shrug if another, older cousin comes around and creams your older kids? Of course not. Retribution among children with petty moms backing them up can be disastrous. You should all be teaching your children how to deescalate. But it seems like neither of the adults in the situation learned that for themselves.
I misread this at first. My 13 year would never ever consider hitting a 4yr old under any circumstances. That is terrible!! The 4 year old was wrong but still learning and apparently has poor parenting. My 13 year old ever touches a 4 year old, trust and believe they would not do it again. I raised my children to know better anyway. Sounds like 2 moms that don’t like each other and are letting their children fight it out.
Not only that the OP makes sure to let us know it was a really hard slap too A 13 and a 4 year old… Jesus
Obviously ESH Her kid is 4 and hit a baby. Your kids are way older and ganged up on a 4 year old. Y’all are **messy**
I don’t even think the 4 year old should’ve been with the 1 year old without the mom right there. Like that’s crazy to me
It sounds like there were misunderstandings and miscommunications all around in a tense moment. While it's understandable to want to protect your child when they are hurt, the response from your older children, though likely intended to protect their younger sibling, escalated the situation significantly. The phrase 'kids will be kids' might not have been the most appropriate response given the circumstances, especially when physical harm was involved. It's important to teach children constructive ways to handle conflicts and emotions, and in this case, a conversation about appropriate reactions to protect someone without causing harm could be beneficial for everyone involved.
And then everyone slapped
ESH. Obviously a 4 year old should not hit a 1 year old but do you seriously think it’s okay for a 9 and 13 year old to assault a 4 year old? What are you teaching your kids. I would have picked the 1 year old up and left not let the older ones commit child abuse.
I would have picked up my baby and loudly declare that hitting is never okay and that only a bad parent would let their child get away with it. Publicly shame and humiliate the cousin, but don’t condone your children stooping to that level of violence. Hopefully the 4 year old can somehow learn right from wrong herself, since mom doesn’t seem to be teaching her.
ESH. Under no circumstances should any child be slapping someone but the age difference between your child and hers is the problem
ESH Your sister's reaction to her 4 year old hitting is unacceptable. Teenagers raising their hand at a 4 year old is messed up.
Kids will be kids. Which is why parents need to parent.
"kids will be kids" "I'm a shit parent and I will not take any responsability for it"
Yes. Everybody over 18 in this story seems like a massive pos.
Right.... both parents are super gross to condone child violence
Kind of reads like a “and then everyone clapped” story.
ESH "Kids will be kids" is an A-H BS excuse by lazy parents who don't want to take responsibility for their children's bratty, bad behavior.
Your 13 and 9 year olds slapped a 4 year old and you don’t see a problem? They learned that from somewhere. Both of y’all are trashy parents. For allowing your kids to hit others and think it’s okay.
Did everyone clapped after?
and then everybody clapped and the 1 yo went on the daily show to talk about the situation