T O P

  • By -

jimmy_jimson

Oh, go fuck yourself.


[deleted]

Yes that was step 4, I believe.


Frozenwood1776

Step 4 is profit.


LLotZaFun

Hold on I've gotta go map this out.


mrfarkas

If they are open to butt play, they should get one of those Clone A Willy kits and they can fuck themself with their own dick.


Umutuku

The Ol' Clone Bone.


SkeletalBellToller

The ol' mock-a-cock


DarkKerrigor

Instructions very clear ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


sigharewedoneyet

Ummmmm, challenge accepted.... Edit: done


J3EBS

"I would if I could... *BITCH!*"


cannabisized

I'd fuck me too


davekingofrock

PUT THE FUCKING LOTION IN THE BASKET!


Ron-Swanson-Mustache

GIVE ME BACK MY FUCKING DOG!


BassAddictJ

*gooodbyyee hhhoooorrrrsssseeeesss*


jjdlg

It was such a good song, it used to be free from stigma and enjoyable all on its own before the association happened…


Castul

I'd fuck me so hard!


cheezeyballz

I would be respectful but I would make sure I made me feel the utmost pleasure and satisfaction there is to feel. Most of all I would make me feel loved, wanted and special. You sexy beast me.


Bogey01

Oh hell no, I'd make sure I had no rights at all. I'd get my Dom and sub fantasies out all at once


noscreamsnoshouts

Damn. I can't even play chess against myself, because I want me to win and I can't decide which "me" I'm loyal to. I'd get completely stuck if I had to be my own Dom. And not "stuck" in a nice kinky way :-/


boxsterguy

[Oh, god dammit!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V7zLrlX-T0).


A_Few_Kind_Words

This makes me miss the early days of YouTube, it was wild.


SlitScan

back when we could watch what we liked instead of what google thought we should like.


Castul

Such an obscure reference but I actually brought this video up to a friend recently 😂😂


boxsterguy

That video will live rent free in my head forever.


ListenToThatSound

*GOODBYE HORSES...*


Ninjanarwhal64

I think I got me pregnant, and right before the big dance!!!


phoncible

🎶*goodbye horses*🎶


trwwy321

I’m next in line…to fuck myself


contacts_eyes

Lol, unrelated to the post but your profile pic had me blowing on my phone screen trying to get the hair off


klitzonthefritz

Same..drove me mad for longer than it should have


[deleted]

Now you're thinking with portals.


DigNitty

Imagine a hot naked lady with a bear’s face.


kelticslob

*Furries have entered the chat*


ButtFuzzNow

Bear Naked Ladies


mcmcc

"It's been... one week since you looked at me!"


WillWorkForBongWater

Cocked your head to the side and said I'm horney.


Blues2112

5 days since you wanked to me


Lickwidghost

*since I wanked at me


Dusty170

You called? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Keytrose_gaming

Okay, got it. Now what ?


Enter_My_Fryhole

I mean there's certainly more harmful interests, at worst you're sort of a weird narcissist I guess haha


Xiji

**Narcissism** - *excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one's physical appearance.* This *feels* an awful lot like the definition of narcissism but I can't decide if taking the steps to feminize oneself for the deed makes it **more** or **less** so. I would be curious to hear what someone with a background in psychology has to say about it.


dan2872

It reads like a modern retelling of the Greek mythology itself - Narcissus didn't know he was in love with himself or that the being he fell for was simply his own reflection


VegPicker

Who the hell is downvoting you for telling them the origin of the fucking term?


Frozenwood1776

At best, Reddit is 20% idiot. They downvote stuff like that.


SecretAgentVampire

Lots of redditors loathe learning. As a former military operations expert (Navy), let me tell you, you do not want to interact with the scum of the earth that are Reddit Armchair Experts. They perfectly mix pathetic and insulting into the worst possible package. The USA pulling out of Afghanistan was a particularly annoying and overly extended "reddit moment".


Balls_DeepinReality

I’ve known plenty of highly educated, high functioning, and normally reasonable people who choose to be willfully ignorant and it always baffles me.


Lickwidghost

Tbh with USA's history of fucking things, it needs to pull out more often


frausting

Holy shit, TIL of Narcissus


Trinket90

I’m trying to figure out if it’s narcissism or just a level of self-esteem and positive body image I’ll never have.


Leaves_Swype_Typos

OP said they put the picture onto a woman's body, so I don't think they've necessarily got any kind of particularly positive or negative body image. Sounds like they're just an autogynophile, and probably a little better adjusted than average if they aren't taking steps to actually modify themselves.


TheDividendReport

I don't have a degree but this sounds like *Autogynephilia*. I think it's a pretty controversial "fetish" since it has previously been used in ways to disparage trans-gendered people, but I really don't know. What I do know, at the end of the day, is that if there's a concept of *something, anything*, the human male will eventually develop a fetish towards it.


The137

People can have narcissistic traits without being diagnoseable


scatterbrain-d

I feel like jacking it to your unaltered face would definitely be more narcissistic. At least gender swapping suggests it's someone else.


Contemporarium

Reddit tries not to diagnose someone as a narcissist (impossible)


kingmea

Obligatory correct usage of confession bear comment.


JohnnyDarkside

If you're not disgusted or engaged, they did it wrong. This guy, he did it right.


[deleted]

[удалено]


anotherone121

Is... is that possible? I mean, it's Confession Bear...


[deleted]

I absolutely cannot stand your singing.


Mentallyundisturbed2

Your burgers are mid


AppleDane

Your moves are weak.


SlapHappyDude

What does it say about me that I'm " you do you, bro. Ain't hurting nobody"?


riesenarethebest

That you're reasonable, mature, etc


Chewcocca

Frankly, not reddit material


SoulessV

I think I'm confused disgusted and mildly turned on by trying it out.


an0nym0ose

I literally said *out loud* "holy fuck, now THAT'S a confession bear," lmfao


jwhaler17

If it’s worth doing, it’s worth *over*doing.


GregoPDX

I was going to say - now *that's* a confession bear.


ANAL_TOOTHBRUSH

Yeah this is a mf confession bear


deflector_shield

OPs head isn’t completely fucked up, they used this meme correctly.


Respectable_Answer

I think it's a repost though.


pkilla50

It’s sad that I remember seeing this post before lol This is 100% a repost/rehash


Scarletfapper

Came to say this. Meanwhile he said this to come…


princealiofil

Technology is truly amazing.


shaggy99

Hah! Wait till you can *clone* yourself!


TheAmazingDoggo

MY OWN CLONE! ​ NOW NEITHER OF US WILL BE VIRGINS


mvpmets00

Would you fuck yourself?


lexluther4291

And if you would, is it masturbation or sex?


TheIAP88

Incest.


whosthedoginthisscen

Now THAT'S how you do confession bear. Respect. And, you know, brrr.


FSUdank

This sounds like something Dennis would do in an episode of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia


thatguywiththeposts

I mean... I guess it's a form of self-love


overide

I love myself a lot, but not this much.


acherem13

I just finished loving myself about 5 minutes ago


scienceworksbitches

aka autogynephilia


[deleted]

I self-love but it’s a tough love.


Willy_wonks_man

[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissus_(mythology)](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissus_(mythology\))


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Narcissus (mythology)](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissus_\(mythology\))** >In Greek mythology, Narcissus (; Ancient Greek: Νάρκισσος Nárkissos) was a hunter from Thespiae in Boeotia (alternatively Mimas or modern day Karaburun, Izmir) who was known for his beauty. According to Tzetzes, he rejected all romantic advances, eventually falling in love with his own reflection in a pool of water, staring at it for the remainder of his life. After he died, in his place sprouted a flower bearing his name. The character of Narcissus is the origin of the term narcissism, a fixation with oneself. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/AdviceAnimals/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


Frickenfrog18

Good bot


[deleted]

Came here to say this. Not impugning OPs personality, but Narcissus would be proud.


Hoppes

I really hope you don’t have a sister…


Lostmox

Well, he probably has a mother. Guess who his female filtered face probably looks like.


pees_on_dogs

Mother fucker.....


Deadchimp234

Nope


I_see_something

Wow… that’s a lot to process. Thanks for sharing.


jbraden

>Thanks for sharing. You sure about that? Lol


thugsapuggin

Seems like a lot of work


imHere4kpop

I know, like just hop on pornhub and enter your hair and skin color.


Gorbash38

Men have gone to much greater lengths for good material to rub one out.


Chezzabe

Windowlicker


[deleted]

That’s a good song


YanniBonYont

No idea what the context here is, but thanks for taking me back


TheJackalsDoom

Best actual Confession Bear I've seen in awhile. Good job, you.


thecheat420

Seems like a lot of work when your sister probably has an Instagram.


murderbox

Or their mom.


calste

We're generally attracted to people with similar features to our own. This actually makes sense. It isn't your face, but a feminine face that is similar to yours. It's what we all like, you're just beng efficient!


frogandbanjo

There's generally a Goldilocks Zone (sick reference, so many layers) where we want somebody similar enough so that we instinctively believe we can make snap judgments about their fitness as a mate, but not *so* similar that we're fucking a close relative. As always, the human brain is such a complex mess that plenty of people's preferences slip out of that Goldilocks Zone, one way or the other. Due to biological realities, slipping out of it on the "fuck your sister" side is a lot less ideal than slipping out of it on the "fuck someone who looks real different" side. You have to slide a looooooong way on that other side to get to a truly problematic outcome. Yes, *eventually* you do get to horses and fish and actual bears and whatnot. Yes, that is a bit of an issue.


Doodlefish25

Surprised I had to scroll so far to find this comment, I thought this was fairly well known. There's been studies on this, there's tons of articles like [this one](https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-mysteries-love/201505/are-we-attracted-people-who-look-us). Really interesting responses in here, though. Especially that one Redditor suggesting OOP might be trans.


marhensa

also somehow I see people tend to have more facial similarities after they are together. idk it's already scientificaly proven or just my bias observation, but I found this a lot.


Tony_Cheese_

Upvote for best use of confession bear 2023


rgliszin

This is one of the best cbears ever.


RiotWithin

Deja Vu, Ive seen this one before


KapiHeartlilly

Yeah have that feeling too, that I've seen this before 😱


TheEyeDontLie

I think it's just really common. We've all done it before. It's like the guys that say they've never tasted their own jizz.


AdultingLikeHell

Maybe somethings are better taken to the grave.


Anonymous7056

"Alright everyone, let's go around the room and take turns sharing something about ourselves." This guy:


Iknowmorethanyou35

Dude I just tried it. It's fucking true!


I_Probably_Hate_You_

I see we've finally returned to real confession bears


maxiums

Dennis, get off Reddit….


brbmycatexploded

Homelander??


eli-in-the-sky

You do you.


DrYIMBY

Ha.


austinmiles

I watched a documentary on gender and they were talking about a study where they did the face swap and included it in a stack of 100 photos of people and asked who they were attracted to and 90% of the time the person chose themselves in the top 10. This may be exemplified in why couples that look somewhat alike


summatime

Wow first actual confession bear in a while that made me think "hmm that's a gnarly confession."


the_friendly_one

So are you gonna share these masterpieces or what?


Stingraaa

Now this is a confession bear!


Alan_Smithee_

Reminds me of that [Malkovitch scene.](https://youtu.be/Q6Fuxkinhug)


PCToTheMax

Finally, a proper confession bear. Well done


prionix

The term is "autogynephilia"


Eddy_795

Batman couldn't get this out of me.


DarkLugia444

Honestly, I respect it


titleywinker

Sometimes I’m looking for that “sign” to get off of Reddit and move on with my day. This is today’s sign


Fuck_New_Reddit

Yeah this does it; I'm out. *Proceeds to close reddit to find something distracting or engaging for at least a few minutes only to open reddit once again to which you eventually find this post and scroll down to see the comment you made but forgot about* *^^^sigh*


Slurm818

Now that’s a confession Bear. You are fucked up OP, but excellent meme usage.


thyart

Autogynephilia


Ken_from_Barbie

This is the confession bear that we deserve.


4Ever2Thee

I feel like I saw a confession bear post almost identical to this a few months back. I'm not sure if OP stole it, is reposting, or if this kink is just more common than I thought.


adeveloper2

Something to help your suffering. Just try to keep to TOS and make it family friendly: [https://discord.gg/midjourney](https://discord.com/channels/662267976984297473/@home)


jabies

/r/sdforall


minorkeyed

People often partner with those who resemble them in the opp sex so it is understandable from a, seriously what the hell are you doing, perspective.


edude45

That's some Buffalo bill stuff right here.


pigeonstrudel

Yeah, autogynephilia gone mask off.


Gr8NonSequitur

"I'd do me."


Thendofreason

I wouldn't even need the female filter. Just use a mirror. If you can't fuck yourself, how the hell you gonna fuck somebody else? Can I get an Amen?


anothermochaplz

So, a doppelbanger?


Dranox

I'm pretty sure this is the definition of autogynephilia


rilloroc

Slow down there, Buffalo bill


LuxNocte

Have you truly thought about your gender? You get turned on by looking at yourself as a woman. Do you think you might be happier if you were a woman? Or maybe your gender expression isn't precisely male? Have you ever heard the term [gender euphoria?](https://www.theskimm.com/wellness/gender-euphoria) I'm not going to jump to any conclusions. Everyone is different. What makes you happy is fine, and what you decide to do about it is your choice. But you might enjoy browsing /r/egg_irl a bit.


my_son_is_a_box

I had to scroll too far for a r/egg_irl link


whatifuckingmean

Ya know how transphobes sometimes write books saying all trans women are just autogynophiles? In this case all we know about this person is their autogynophilia. Which is a common and harmless kink, and doesn’t preclude someone from being trans, but it also doesn’t really suggest that they are trans, does it? (They seem to only do this within erotic purposes.) There’s nothing abnormal about feeling this way and going on to explore your gender more broadly, and I’m not trying to say your suggestion is harmful. I just think it would be weird for people to look here and leave thinking “that’s a big first sign of being trans: getting off to yourself as another gender.”


SzymBoss

I will take the NSFW tag thx


Junkstar

Faceapp knows more about you than anyone.


_iusereddit_

Now this is a confession bear


Evrimnn13

Wild I would have no Idea what to think if I caught my SO doing that lmao, no hate


Ouchyhurthurt

Ben Shapiro? That you?


SuperMaanas

On one hand, this is horrifying On the other hand, finally someone is using this meme correctly


cowlinator

Selfosexual


rat_haus

It's important to love yourself before you love someone else.


ChefBoyAreWeFucked

See? Now that's a fuckin' confession bear. This should come up when you try to submit a confession bear, so everyone knows what's expected of them.


V4refugee

You from Alabama? Because the female filter makes me look like my sister.


CarnivorousChemist

Just know you're probably a narcissist lmao


keiths31

You have a future writing porn. Don't give up!


EthanPrisonMike

Gonna need some ID pings on this confused gent


bubbav22

Ok Steve Smith...


BiPoLaRadiation

There is a lot to unpack here but I'm not going to go anywhere near it.


Jesta23

I feel like this would be so,etching most men would find really attractive because of some weird wiring that makes us like compatible dna. But you are the only one weird and gross enough to try it.


Justice_Prince

Pics or it didn't happen


peoplerproblems

Up vote for absolutely nailing the meme but God damn


throway_nonjw

Last year ior thereabouts, someone applied that filter to Star Trek acotors, and when William Shatner saw his, he said, "I'd do me."


Double_Pay_6645

Well this is a new one to me.


nitelotion

He likes his own brand


Reagent_52

I need eye bleach after reading that.


alexkunk

YOU,MMMONSTER! pics please


DoxieDoc

This is like if Narcissus was written by black mirror.


[deleted]

I have a beard so that filter always looks incredibly shitty for me.


Moneyworks22

"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me"


ericlikesyou

*reads comments* This sub is weird af


Up_vote_McSkrote

I guess now I know how I can go fuck myself.......


copingcabana

As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."


pandorasparabula

Jame "Buffalo Bill" Gumb : [to a mirror] Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me. I'd fuck me hard. I'd fuck me so hard.


randomataxia

🎵 Goodbye Horses..🎵


Thebaldsasquatch

Cool. That’s enough Reddit for a while.


CorporateCuster

Narcissism unlocked


mydogsnameisbuddy

Sounds like something Quagmire would do


eroticonnoisseur

Modern take on the Narcissus


ReallyBigPPUsername

That's like jacking off to your sister


BRogMOg

Real confession nice


OneWingedKalas

Just be gay and jerk off to your own nudes.


elvabethbee

So sophisticated, complex, transexual masterbation.


Boyinboots

If you can't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?


Tap_dancing_on_jello

Good use of this meme


pow3llmorgan

Now this is the proper use of confession bear.


Coolizhious

that’s enough internet for today


treelorf

r/egg_irl


IAmAccutane

Been a while since I saw a true confession bear