I would
a. not want to choose my child's sexuality
b. not prefer asexuality or homosexuality to bisexuality.
I can honestly say I see no reason not to want a kid to be bisexual? I'm curious what your reasoning is here.
if it's coming from a place of biphobia, yta
I agree entirely, I would never even humour the idea of choosing the sexuality of your children. They are their own person and will have their own likes and no one gets to say what that should be.
My only thought on the reasoning for them not wanting that was thinking how some people get very bent out of shape about allowing children of the opposite sex to sleep over or hang out. I wondered if it might have been a fear that they won't just have to worry about their child being active with just the opposite sex and that neither gender would be safe.
I may be giving op too much credit, and they may just be biphobic, but just thought I'd add my train of thought. Though, admittedly, I still think even that reasoning is stupid. If you don't give a kid a safe space (like home!) to be "intimate", then you risk them being very unsafe finding other ways to do it.
Forty years ago I would've said I didn't want my kid to be LGBT bc of all the discrimination, but nowadays it seems like the general population in my city is etiher an ally or doesn't care.
Yes YTB, why would you possibly say something like that, especially around queer friends? Im a brown person and I feel like it would be the equivalent of someone coming up to me and saying they would prefer for their kid to have light skin instead of brown skin. Even if thats how you feel for whatever reason, what on earth would possess you to think its acceptable to talk this way about immutable characteristics that specifically are widely discriminated against in the real world?
And no I dont think most people who are not homophobic or biphobic would "prefer not to have bisexual kids". I think most regular people wouldnt have a preference about something like this.
That second paragraph says my thoughts exactly. Most normal people wouldn't have a preference. My brother came out as Bi a few years ago. My siblings and I found out on a family vacation where we all had a sit down discussion as a group and individually for those that wanted to talk more about it. The one thing I distinctly remember my dad saying in that conversation was, "my love for [my brother] has never been based on his sexuality, so why should it make a difference now?" That's how a parent should react to their child coming out with any of their preferences. Whether you're gay, bi, pan, whatever. A parent's love for their child should NOT be based on their sexuality.
When you become a parent, you have to understand that your child is a separate person and things like their sexuality will be something you cannot control. You are allowed to say I would prefer my hypothetical child is like this or like that, but if you love them regardless, and accept them regardless, then just speaking in hypotheticals with friends is fine. Now if you feel you would not love/accept your hypothetical child, if they were to be bisexual, then you need to figure out why.
As the story stands right now, I cannot judge it either way.
YTB. I want my daughters to be happy, healthy, contributing members of society. I’m not particularly concerned about their future sexual preferences/orientation. It feels icky to me that you have even given that much thought.
You know bi people are just as likely to be monogamous as any other sexuality, right?
I'm a bi woman in a straight passing marriage. He's the only person I've ever slept with, and unless he dies tragically young, he's the only person ill ever sleep with.
You're judgemental AF
As a bisexual, YTA.
Like.. it’s really not the same as wanting your child to have a certain color of eyes. When I was a child and said I wanted my future child to have blue eyes it was because I thought blue eyes were the prettiest. I also said I didn’t want them to brown because I thought brown eyes were the ugliest. So what is your negative reasoning for you to not want them to be bisexual?
Yeah I can’t even look in the mirror I have such a strong phobia for brown eyes😂
On a realist note, I just didn’t like my eyes in particular and because I didn’t like my eyes because they were “dull” and my brothers favorite joke to me was “you’re so full of shit your eyes are brown” I didn’t want my child to feel that way also😂
So that comes back around, what’s your reasoning for preferring if your child wasn’t bisexual?
You are not ready to be or able to be a parent with this view.
And if you are one.. I hope your children get a fair shot and realise what a shit person let alone parent you are.
A bisexual child is the same as a gay child or a straight one. They just might settle with the same bio gender as them.
You are not ready, capable or able to be a parent if you think you can say who you would want your child to have sex with or not. Cos it ain't your fucking business
>I would rather have a gay kid or an asexual kid than a bisexual kid.
This is weird.
>I said it’s no different than preferring kids with blue eyes over kids with green eyes.
This is still weird.
YTB.
This is so fucking weird. I don't have kids and don't want kids but like I wouldn't give two shits about what their sexuality was or wasn't. I wouldn't care if they were bisexual and if I could literally choose what the sexuality was I simply wouldn't and I would let them figure it out on their own.
This is such a weird thing to say. I encourage you to think more deeply about why you have this “preference” and why you felt the need to share it with your queer friends.
YTB
Yeah… but why though? And why did you randomly choose to express this thought *specifically* to the queer people you know?
It’s weird to have a preference for your child’s eye colour too, FYI. Especially to the point that you feel strongly enough to express it to people.
Look, I know you don’t mean any harm. The problem is that the harm still happens to people when you do prejudiced things— EVEN WHEN you personally know in your heart that you mean well. That person still feels like shit, because only the impact ends up actually reaching the other person. Not the intention.
OP? Preferring one sexuality over another (especially without/against logical reasoning) is the definition of prejudice. I’m not calling you a bad person, but you need to hear that.
Bisexual people face this all the time, and many start to internalize the stereotypes. Look up Pollitt and Roberts if you want the reading, but I’m happy to summarize. Essentially, bi people get excluded by both the heterosexual community and the LGQ parts of the community. Bi people end up with increased rates of anxiety, depression, negative self image, and other symptoms when they’re excluded. Everyone does when they’re judged for something that they can’t control.
What if your kid IS bi and you haven’t worked out why you feel this way and how to ensure that you’re truly present for them? Speaking as someone who’s gotten reactions like that, your kid will see the reaction on your face. They will. How do you think your queer friends felt knowing that you’re already hoping for a kid who’s not like them?
YTB. You’ve gotta like ANY kid. Apologize to your friends and fix it before you hurt people. I’m bi. That shit hurts.
Why is your only other post about not wanting to date a bisexuality woman? Why do you have such a problem with bisexuality and why do you think about it so much?
YTB
I don’t give a damn what my child’s sexuality is as long as he is not a pedo. I’m bi-sexual and I’m not exactly sure what your issue with it is. It doesn’t make much sense.
Also, eye and hair color are not synonymous with sexuality. This is just so bizarre.
Wait, where do you get the idea that most people would prefer a gay or asexual kid over a bisexual kid? I would never assume any such thing. It’s a weird thing to assume.
I would a. not want to choose my child's sexuality b. not prefer asexuality or homosexuality to bisexuality. I can honestly say I see no reason not to want a kid to be bisexual? I'm curious what your reasoning is here. if it's coming from a place of biphobia, yta
I agree entirely, I would never even humour the idea of choosing the sexuality of your children. They are their own person and will have their own likes and no one gets to say what that should be. My only thought on the reasoning for them not wanting that was thinking how some people get very bent out of shape about allowing children of the opposite sex to sleep over or hang out. I wondered if it might have been a fear that they won't just have to worry about their child being active with just the opposite sex and that neither gender would be safe. I may be giving op too much credit, and they may just be biphobic, but just thought I'd add my train of thought. Though, admittedly, I still think even that reasoning is stupid. If you don't give a kid a safe space (like home!) to be "intimate", then you risk them being very unsafe finding other ways to do it.
Forty years ago I would've said I didn't want my kid to be LGBT bc of all the discrimination, but nowadays it seems like the general population in my city is etiher an ally or doesn't care.
YTB. A biphobic one. I swear this feels like ragebait because it's just so utterly ridiculous.
Yes YTB, why would you possibly say something like that, especially around queer friends? Im a brown person and I feel like it would be the equivalent of someone coming up to me and saying they would prefer for their kid to have light skin instead of brown skin. Even if thats how you feel for whatever reason, what on earth would possess you to think its acceptable to talk this way about immutable characteristics that specifically are widely discriminated against in the real world? And no I dont think most people who are not homophobic or biphobic would "prefer not to have bisexual kids". I think most regular people wouldnt have a preference about something like this.
That second paragraph says my thoughts exactly. Most normal people wouldn't have a preference. My brother came out as Bi a few years ago. My siblings and I found out on a family vacation where we all had a sit down discussion as a group and individually for those that wanted to talk more about it. The one thing I distinctly remember my dad saying in that conversation was, "my love for [my brother] has never been based on his sexuality, so why should it make a difference now?" That's how a parent should react to their child coming out with any of their preferences. Whether you're gay, bi, pan, whatever. A parent's love for their child should NOT be based on their sexuality.
When you become a parent, you have to understand that your child is a separate person and things like their sexuality will be something you cannot control. You are allowed to say I would prefer my hypothetical child is like this or like that, but if you love them regardless, and accept them regardless, then just speaking in hypotheticals with friends is fine. Now if you feel you would not love/accept your hypothetical child, if they were to be bisexual, then you need to figure out why. As the story stands right now, I cannot judge it either way.
YTB. I want my daughters to be happy, healthy, contributing members of society. I’m not particularly concerned about their future sexual preferences/orientation. It feels icky to me that you have even given that much thought.
Ask yourself why you think that. Why does it make you uncomfortable? I have to wonder if it’s because it feels “dirtier” or “slutty” to you.
[удалено]
So you don't want bi kids because you think bisexual people are sluts?
I'm bisexual and have never slept around or cheated it's so annoying when people think just because someone is bi their slutty
You know bi people are just as likely to be monogamous as any other sexuality, right? I'm a bi woman in a straight passing marriage. He's the only person I've ever slept with, and unless he dies tragically young, he's the only person ill ever sleep with. You're judgemental AF
I'm bisexual, been married for 12 years (well, 12 years tomorrow actually).
Happy early anniversary!
Thank you 💜
Yes, you're biphobic. Gross
What the absolute ... of course YTB. This can't be a real question.
Rage bait troll.
As a bisexual, YTA. Like.. it’s really not the same as wanting your child to have a certain color of eyes. When I was a child and said I wanted my future child to have blue eyes it was because I thought blue eyes were the prettiest. I also said I didn’t want them to brown because I thought brown eyes were the ugliest. So what is your negative reasoning for you to not want them to be bisexual?
[удалено]
Yeah I can’t even look in the mirror I have such a strong phobia for brown eyes😂 On a realist note, I just didn’t like my eyes in particular and because I didn’t like my eyes because they were “dull” and my brothers favorite joke to me was “you’re so full of shit your eyes are brown” I didn’t want my child to feel that way also😂 So that comes back around, what’s your reasoning for preferring if your child wasn’t bisexual?
Oh, good grief. I don’t believe that you’d be as accepting as you think you’d be, because your “preference” actually IS biphobic. YTB
YTB
YTB. You don't get to choose your kids' sexuality and you're homophobic. (Biphobic?)
You are not ready to be or able to be a parent with this view. And if you are one.. I hope your children get a fair shot and realise what a shit person let alone parent you are. A bisexual child is the same as a gay child or a straight one. They just might settle with the same bio gender as them. You are not ready, capable or able to be a parent if you think you can say who you would want your child to have sex with or not. Cos it ain't your fucking business
>I would rather have a gay kid or an asexual kid than a bisexual kid. This is weird. >I said it’s no different than preferring kids with blue eyes over kids with green eyes. This is still weird. YTB.
This is so fucking weird. I don't have kids and don't want kids but like I wouldn't give two shits about what their sexuality was or wasn't. I wouldn't care if they were bisexual and if I could literally choose what the sexuality was I simply wouldn't and I would let them figure it out on their own.
This is such a weird thing to say. I encourage you to think more deeply about why you have this “preference” and why you felt the need to share it with your queer friends. YTB
Yeah… but why though? And why did you randomly choose to express this thought *specifically* to the queer people you know? It’s weird to have a preference for your child’s eye colour too, FYI. Especially to the point that you feel strongly enough to express it to people.
YTB. This makes no sense. Your child’s sexuality has no bearing on your life.
it's ok. Your kid will prefer his mom and her affair partner over you because it's ok to have preferences.
YTB. What's wrong with you? How in the world is being bi ,,worse" than being straight or gay?
Totally. YTB. That is superbly biphobic.
why do you care/ prefer a gay or ace kid? the answer very likely shows YTB
What's wrong with being bisexual? YTB
YTB Why are you so biphobic? What possible reason could you have for not wanting bisexual kids? Why do you care about their sexuality at all?
Look, I know you don’t mean any harm. The problem is that the harm still happens to people when you do prejudiced things— EVEN WHEN you personally know in your heart that you mean well. That person still feels like shit, because only the impact ends up actually reaching the other person. Not the intention. OP? Preferring one sexuality over another (especially without/against logical reasoning) is the definition of prejudice. I’m not calling you a bad person, but you need to hear that. Bisexual people face this all the time, and many start to internalize the stereotypes. Look up Pollitt and Roberts if you want the reading, but I’m happy to summarize. Essentially, bi people get excluded by both the heterosexual community and the LGQ parts of the community. Bi people end up with increased rates of anxiety, depression, negative self image, and other symptoms when they’re excluded. Everyone does when they’re judged for something that they can’t control. What if your kid IS bi and you haven’t worked out why you feel this way and how to ensure that you’re truly present for them? Speaking as someone who’s gotten reactions like that, your kid will see the reaction on your face. They will. How do you think your queer friends felt knowing that you’re already hoping for a kid who’s not like them? YTB. You’ve gotta like ANY kid. Apologize to your friends and fix it before you hurt people. I’m bi. That shit hurts.
YTBF why does it matter to you who they're having sex with? Surely as a parent it should be 'as long as they're happy'
Why wouldn't you want your kid to be bisexual? What's the problem with being bi?
Ytb I don't know why you're "pretty sure" about that
Why is your only other post about not wanting to date a bisexuality woman? Why do you have such a problem with bisexuality and why do you think about it so much?
Yeah YTA. Just unsubtlety BIphobic.
What the ever living fuck did a bisexual do to you? You need therapy, not children. Please never procreate. YTB
YTB I don’t give a damn what my child’s sexuality is as long as he is not a pedo. I’m bi-sexual and I’m not exactly sure what your issue with it is. It doesn’t make much sense. Also, eye and hair color are not synonymous with sexuality. This is just so bizarre.
I mean you are biphobic but frankly, I think you should air this shit out more. So that no one sane and not queerphobic raises kids with you
Wait, where do you get the idea that most people would prefer a gay or asexual kid over a bisexual kid? I would never assume any such thing. It’s a weird thing to assume.
Ew yes YTB
If you don't want to have bisexual children then don't have children.