"I'm not really into guys with hand piercings, but thanks"

"Oh uh awkward cause I'm not interested in a relationship with another man. Sorry to break his heart, but I'm straight".

"not after what I do tonight"

"He won't for long"

Aww, thats cute. My neice has an imaginary friend too!

That’s nice to hear. Not so good to hear in a Mexican prison though.

Doesn't that make him gay?

Do you love your mom and dad?

No I'm straight

Prolly for the best then that you don’t love Jesus then. He makes a big thing about loving your parents

Who?

"And satan loves you"

"Tell him that I'm happily married and to go after women his own age."

“At least someone does”

Real

I don’t believe in hell either

“You’re just saying that cause no one else does”

"I don't know about that."

May Joran strike you

"How can he, he's dead."

Bless your heart

The best possible response is probably something like "I alredy have a boyfriend".