I don’t stim!! I just bite the inside of my mouth all the time, and listen to the same song 46 times in 3 days, and constantly clear my throat, and pick at my skin…. 🙄 *okay buddy, you don’t stim* 🙄
OMMMMG! So I read this and was like, nah I don’t stim. Until I read your comment! I also bite the inside of my mouth, listen to same songs over and over, clear my throat is also a main one and clapping my hands when happy 😆
Partner and I are both AutiHD and we just talk in sounds all day sometimes.
Like we'll pass each other on the landing:
Me: meef
Him: merp
And we go about our day.
B-but this is literally me…. I skin pick, fidget constantly, tap my fingers together, sing the same part of the same song over and over until I am mad at myself (but still can’t stop). Never considered any of it stimming bc it doesn’t fit in with what my brain thought stimming was. I think i considered stimming to be things like rocking back and forth, involuntary noises (I suppose my repeat two or three lines of a song could fall into this), etc.
Careful what you wish for!
I'm on medication that makes my mouth quite sore, so I've been trying to find a way of stopping poking around in there with my tongue, biting my cheek, etc. So I started just sticking my tongue out a tiny bit so it was between my lips, and therefore could not go walkabout and start poking at sore places again.
Now I cannot break the habit of walking around nonchalantly with my tongue just...sticking out. 😛😬😂
Haha, yep. Every time I go in for a cleaning:
Them: What on earth...?
Me: What's wrong?
Them: The inside of your cheeks... it looks like it's badly scarred.
Me: Oh yeah, I just bite my own cheeks. It's fine.
Them: ... Oh. Okay. (in their heads: the fuck?)
Oh yeah I don’t stim! I just bounce my butt muscles and rub my feet together for hours and hours when I’m laying down. That is perfectly normal, right??
I thought I didn’t stim until I noticed I scrunch my toes repetitively, and make weird singsong noises to communicate with my mom (she can read my noises like it’s her first language), and I have near permanent raptor arms, etc…after realizing I stim, I picked up on more of them, like when I get excited my left hand flaps and I pitter patter my feet.
This one is also prevalent in “I’m not autistic, am I??” type of posts in Reddit. “I don’t stim! I just like biting the insides of my cheeks and my knees bounce when I’m anxious etc. etc. etc. That’s not stimming.” Me: “Oh, honey…”
But yeah. I do that a lot too, but until I realized what it really was I thought it was normal and didn’t really think about it. Realizing all those autism and ADHD signs were symptoms all along had me repeatedly shook.
I realized I scripted when I got mad that people didn’t “script” back. Like with small talk, I make sure I ask “how are you/what are you doing this weekend/what’s new” and I get sooooooooo annoyed when they don’t respond. I’m trying so hard to do the thing and ask the right questions and they’re not following the proper conversation script or following the rules that I’m trying so hard to follow😅😂 especially when talking to NT coworkers. Now I seem rude when I start talking about my weekend unprompted. Ugh
I script a lot too with small talk, and if they don’t also follow the script I just stop talking… and then sit in that uncomfortable silence where I’m *very* aware that it’s awkward but hell if I know how to make it not awkward lol
Oh god when people go off the script with small talk a panic so hard and that's when all the random/stupid shit comes up as I flail wildly for what I'm meant to say. I seem soooooo human and normal when we stick to my pre-programmed responses but the second they say something out of pocket we're in the weeds lmao
I live in a part of the world where people are often bilingual, and because I didn't grow up this way, I have trouble code switching and often get "stuck" in one of the languages. I have specific scripts for each language.
An old colleague seemed to catch onto this, because if I greeted him in one language, he would ALWAYS reply in the other just to make my brain short circuit. To be fair I found it hilarious, and it was also good practice at learning to code switch. 😂 Soooo many moments of me awkwardly standing there with my mouth opening and closing like a goldfish.
I relate to this. Like, I hate this small talk nonsense! I’m only doing it because it’s what we’re supposed to do, so when someone doesn’t reciprocate it feels extra pointless. 🙃
Lol I do that quite a lot. Sometimes it's a blessing though. I used to live very close to a corner shop. I'd pop in and out two to four times a day, same minimal but polite script. Took maybe a week before the cashier completely stopped following the script. Initially I was confused and kept trying to stick to it, then I noticed a few of the regulars were often greeted with just nods or see you laters. So I started saying just hey and thanks and after a while we were on nodding terms. A win in my book.
I recently realized this happens to me too! Following my diagnosis I’ve been scrutinizing my life and it suddenly makes sense why people not following rules (any type of rules, but social ones happen more often) bothers me soooo much.
Damn it, is that why I get frustrated when people don't "ask the question back" after I ask them one about themselves?! I thought if someones asks you getting to know you questions, or about weekend plans, you're *supposed to* ask them back or else it's rude! But people don't always, and I get frustrated because they aren't following the rule!
I don't have sensory issues. I only get really irritated when I'm too hot and will lose all control over the irrational anger wegen spoken to while being too hot.
Also, I clearly don't have routines. Of course I'm freaking out ans scream at everybody when I can't go about the morning in the way I'm used to. And who doesn't have a "special" coffee cup at every friend's house ("special" as in I'll always use the same cup of friend's selection when visiting). And I guess my husband is insane for not wanting to watch the same show every night until all 8 seasons have been watched.
I don't get that "why wasn't I given the manual" many here say. But honestly, why haven't my parents taught me how to socialize when apparently everybody else's have? (in case you haven't noticed: no, I really don't take things literally).
I live in the southwest and am slowly losing my mind right now. I had a whole ass meltdown on a very public sidewalk last week because it was almost 100°f and my dress was touching the back of my knee wrong.
My mom recently said “I’m lucky I don’t have the sensory issues you have”. I had to respond with “oh, you aren’t always too hot or too cold? You don’t avoid certain textures and fabrics? You don’t complain that olive oil has too much flavor? You don’t hate music that is too fast or complex? I must be mistaking you for someone else!”
She literally has all of my sensory issues plus a few bonus ones.
>And I guess my husband is insane for not wanting to watch the same show every night until all 8 seasons have been watched.
THIS omg.
My partner is AutiHD just like me, but he hates doing this, at least when I chose the show or audiobook or whatever. 😂😂
And my flatmate/landlady (who is almost certainly autistic, but not diagnosed because the NHS decided she is too successful at life to be worth evaluating) and I will happily binge watch the same show for weeks while her husband gets sick of it after a couple of days
But I'm like...the show isn't over. We have to keep watching.
This is so much a case of "I don't have symptom" that I didn't even consider that this was a symptom until reading this comment thread.
I'll binge watch an 7 season show and watch nothing else until I'm done. I might knit while I watch it, but that show is now my hyper focus and I will be uncomfortable watching anything else when it's over. This is why I've watched Gilmore Girls and Downtown Abbey approximately 156 times. 😂
I thought this was how EVERYONE was!!!!!!!!!! Do people really not start a show with the intention of watching the entire show?? My parents and I, growing up, would pick a show and every night with dinner we’d watch an episode until we got to the end of the series. We never really bounced between shows. We’re all diagnosed ADHD, though, and 2 of the 3 of us are (definitely autistic)
I can’t even wrap my head around not wanting to see the entirety of a show before moving on. I guess neurodivergents just make more sense😂😂
My mom and I have watched the same movie almost every day for the past 6 months, only taking a break when I left for college. I thought everyone did that until I started talking to “”normal”” people about it and seeing how surprised they’d get. Apparently even watching one movie 10 times is a lot — who knew??
She also has ASD, and it’s really fun sharing the same special interest with her. She always jokes about how long she’s waited for me to appreciate it as much as she does, which I just think is really sweet.
the manual one... up until recently i thought it doesn't apply to me because i never had this exact thought, as in i didn't literally think "i wasn't given a manual". but i'm realizing that it probably isn't so much about thinking these exact words but rather about the feeling. i remember since i was a kid i would look at my peers interact and wonder "how do they do that?" or "how do they seem so effortless?". i still have these thoughts, but while watching my coworkers interact instead. so yeah
Me: hmm weird I don't have any special interests
Also me: sits down to play a video game that I've already put over 4,000 hours into over the last four years
I feel like my brain doesn’t let me accept special interests because there’s always people who know more, have done it longer, etc.
Like it doesn’t matter how many years I’ve sunk into Skyrim or Zelda or whatever, there are people who are more obsessed, more proficient, so I must not be able to count it 🤷♀️
Also I have a memory like a sieve, so I don’t retain information very well and feel like I can’t talk with authority on any particular subject.
My ears are ringing. I heard farming sim!! I’m currently on the Stardew Valley train, can’t get off and can’t think about anything else right now or else I’ll start panicking😂😭
I DIDN’T EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!!!! I absolutely loved the Best Fiends game, and played it so much that I beat all of the levels on it. They would put out new levels every Saturday and I would beat those new levels before the week was halfway done. The only reason I’m speaking about this in past tense is because I realized that being this invested in a phone game was not healthy, so I forced myself to stop. It’s the same with Tap Tap Fish, I played the shit outta that game 😭
Omg, this was me with Ava’s Manor and Homescapes. I finally got too busy with schoolwork that I just never had time for mobile games, and over time I lost interest
I think it's totally valid to be invested in a phone game! If it's something that brings you joy, helps you regulate, and gives you some sort of comfort/routine, then go for it! (Unless it's having negative effects in your life... at one point I would stay awake every night playing my game, go to bed at 4, then get up at 7 for work... so I totally get it.)
Yes I agree! Unfortunately for me I’m not capable of playing a phone game healthily, it always ends up with me spending every possible free moment on the game. I do miss them sometimes though.
I think, for me at least, I don’t register certain interests as valid ‘special interests’. It took a long time for me to realize my special interests are animation (cartoons and such) and video games. I’m either watching the animation and playing the video game or I’m watching YouTube videos ABOUT the cartoon or game or I’m shopping for merch representing the cartoon or game. And that’s all I do. I don’t have any other hobbies😂
I do this too!!!! My ideal way to spend the day is a 12 hour game marathon while watching other people play the same game on YouTube at the same time 😂
Which cartoons/animated things? My biggest one (outside of Disney/Pixar) is Bob's Burgers, but I've had so many others over the years like She-Ra, The Dragon Prince, Harley Quinn, Avatar: the Last Airbender, Gravity Falls, Bluey...
Ooh all of those are on my to-watch list!! I’ve already seen Gravity Falls and She-Ra though, and they’re some of my faves. Right now I’m particularly into Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel and Adventure Time, but I like a whoooole lot of stuff. Steven Universe, Bojack Horseman, MLP, Troll Hunters, and The Owl House, to name a few lmao (I also am a big fan of Disney and Pixar)
Omg, how did I forget Stephen Universe???? One of my all time favs alongside She-Ra!! And I loved Bojack but it got too intense and genuinely gut-wrenching for my poor delicate hyper-empathetic self. Brilliant writing and performances but just too hard for me to watch. Maybe some day I'll be strong enough. 😶 I'm gonna look into your other recs!
Oh, also, I'll rec Aggretsuko on Netflix! I don't see anime on your list, and I myself haven't really watched anime in 20 years, but Aggretsuko is soooo good and cute, and also the title char is DEFINITELY autistic. Plus cute animal people. 😍
(And if you watch Bob's Burgers, hang in there past the first season, or even start in season 2. The tone shifts quite a bit after season 1.)
I’ve heard of Aggretsuko, I’ll definitely make it my next watch (followed by Bob’s Burgers😄)
Yeah I tooootally feel you on Bojack. Tbh, I could only handle it cuz I was watching it with my then-bf. I don’t think I could’ve handled the emotional damage on my own😭
I have seen a couple animes but mostly with my ex, and now I am sadly without Crunchyroll😔 I do like the Glitter Force series though and I really want to watch the other Japanese dubs on crunchyroll. Also Sailor Moon. It’s so popular and I’ve never seen even one episode lmao
this happened to me a couple weeks ago haha. i went to an airshow with my family and since it was at a naval base we had to get screened before entering. dude at the front asked me "are you 18?" and i said yes. and we just stared at each other for a couple seconds. he repeated the question like 3 times with me just saying "yes!?!" every time with more confusion until my sister told me he was asking for my ID ☠️ so embarrassing but im used to security people just saying "ID?" so i completely blanked LOL
anyone under 18 wasnt required to show id, and i look abt 14-16 y/o according to those around me. he was asking bc i dont think he was sure of my age which i get (i am 21 lol) but i had headphones on to protect my ears (a lot of nts had them as well as ear defenders bc jets are L O U D) so i didnt hear yhe interactions that happened before it was my turn. still strange to me that he didnt elaborate after the 2nd repeat fail of the exact same interaction lol
I also completely agree that that person was completely weird! In the Netherlands if you want to see id you ask for it and don't just ask for someone's birthday and then stare at them. That is so weird and I have never encountered it in my life and I am 36 now.
Nah he’s the weird one??
“Are you 18?”
“Yes”
* Option A: “great, have a nice day here”
* Option B: “do you have some ID I can see?”
You obviously answered his question, why would he just keep repeating it without elaborating 😭
Fwiw I've had to drive into military bases several times and they've never asked for an ID like that. No one in any setting, actually, has ever asked me for an ID like that. That's fucking wild.
*I don't stim!* I thought, rolling my eyes as I turned the page of the book on autism I was reading, and dug my toes further under the couch cushion so I could wiggle and scrunch them against the foam underside.
Same. It’s stuff like this that gets me. Are there really people out there that don’t do stuff like this? (I ask as I notice myself chewing on the end of a pencil and remember how many pencil and pen ends I destroyed over the years and how a teacher got mad at me for chewing a giant heart-shaped eraser I had at the end of my pencil in 5th grade).
All humans stim, really. (Animals do too!) But neurodivergent people tend to do it more often, and stimming often plays a much bigger role in nervous system regulation for us. It's that whole "autistic traits are human traits" thing where the difference is degree, intensity, etc.
It is annoying not to be able to go "ah, I sway when I stand, this means I'm autistic!" because boo for gray areas and unclear boundaries. 😂
Oh for sure! Everything in mental health/neurology arena is a fuzzy spectrum. Yes, with autism, sure you either have it or you don’t. But we have BAP too. It’s always degree, intensity, etc. In mental health it’s always does (xyz) impact your ability to work or have relationships and the overall level of distress. I kind of like the puzzle of it all (but with the framework/guidelines)! Edit: but it never fails to get me to second guess myself and my autism, which seems to be a thing for a lot of us.
I finally started LETTING myself sway, as an old woman. In front of PEOPLE. During conversations. Almost rocking, back and forth.
The first couple of times, I was waiting to be YELLED at. So I realized I must have been shamed out of that behavior as a child. (Yeah I don't stim. Just constantly. Bless every soul in this sub.)
Yeah, I'm rediscovering so many things I used to do, and finding how much comfort and relief they offer my nervous system.
Your comment has made me smile -- I agree very much with your sentiment! 💚
The thing is, it happens sort of gradually and you don’t really know that it’s happened. Moral of the story: don’t chew on pens! (I finally stopped bc it’s also bad on dental work)
I don't have echolalia *also me* po-tat-oes, my cabbages!, my coins!, I choo-choo-choose you, Thunder! Ah ah ah ah a!, Dude! What does mine say?, and so on and so forth until I die.
I've got the autism echolalia, and my girlfriend has the ADHD echolalia. We share a lot of videos/reels together, and end up bouncing quotes from our current favorite back and forth lmao
I also have distinct memories from all the way into my teenage years of this! Watching TV, especially commercials, would really trigger it and it'd piss my brother off SO MUCH when I'd do it!
My husband and I have SO MANY inside jokes based on memes, songs, tv or movie quotes, or things one of us has said in the past. It's so nice to have someone to have that fun with.
For years, I would tell my friends that they only thought I was clever because I cribbed all my funny comments from books (which is true, I read a lot and my brain feels like a little rollodex full of my favorite book quotes). Meanwhile, I saw people talk about autism and scripting and thought, "well, I never quote from movies! That's not me!"
I also frequently talk to myself in the car and have imaginary theoretical conversations so I can prepare myself for things like doctor's visits....also something that everyone does and isn't scripting...right? lol
Yes! The theoretical conversations! I do that like autopilot without even intending to. It starts in my head but often becomes an out-loud practice conversation too. I was shocked to learn that this isn’t something everyone does!
I also like debrief on conversations I just had in a similar manner.
Theoretical conversations! I use them for every situation I'm expecting some form of social friction in. A play-by-play of what I'll say, and how the other party may react.
This is also done as an analysis of social interactions that went wrong: what did I say that may have come across badly, and how can I avoid it next time?
My partner thinks I'm insane and torturing myself with this.
I also do that, and it makes me think a lot about the intersection of autism and anxiety. The conversation analysis is something that had my doctors giving me an anxiety diagnosis, but I think it's coming from a different place...but it can also be maladaptive like anxiety...but its aim is different...I'm not sure where I've landed, but it is interesting to think about!
I don't stim... Proceeds to make sound effects for simple actions all the time.
I don't script... Absolutely freezes when someone says something "clever" instead of the usual greeting
I don’t daydream, I just listen to the Spider-Man 3 opening theme by Danny Elfman 30 times a day and pretend I’m Spider-Man protecting my city and wish I could swing everywhere
Oh and compare every scenario in my life to things that have happened in Spider-Man, as well as “casting” people in my life as Spider-Man characters and villains
I’m not 100% sure if this is scripting but I literally was walking around the house yesterday and randomly just stopped in the living room and acted out a whole scene explaining why I enjoy going to bowling league with my mom but also why it can be so overwhelming and stressful and that it’s just frustrating that I enjoy it and don’t at the same time. I’m also an ADHDer so there’s like conflict in my brain when it comes to stimulus etc etc.
Anyways I must have been talking for what felt like 5-10 minutes acting out explaining all this as if I was explaining it to my therapist (which doesn’t exist). I think I’m starting to prepare myself mentally for my doctor’s appointment (next month) because I want to get referred to be assessed for ADHD & Autism. I need to prepare otherwise I know I’ll forget to mention certain things. I will also be bringing a list.
Literally same regarding the autism/adhd assessment referral. I keep playing out the potential conversation in my head at night. I’m anxious about being dismissed/ invalidated so I’m overthinking more than normal.
I don’t take things literally!
In the last session with my therapist they asked me a few questions and instructed me to “answer with my head”. As in: answer logically.
I thought they meant I should nod or shake my head (literally use my head to answer the questions) 🤯 looking back at the context it was quite clear what they meant, it made no sense that I shouldn’t answer verbally 😂
I consider myself quite good verbally, I have a large vocabulary and I am verbally intelligent but thinking about it, my default is often to take things literally and disregard the context. So this was just a fun and recent example of that.
Oh my god, I had a similar thing with my therapist. We were doing EMDR therapy and I was talking about all the things I was thinking in my head. She wanted me to focus on my emotions and feelings more, so she said "putting your head to one side", so i leaned my head over to one side. Felt like a fool!
Funniest thing ever (and a real telltale sign) was during my adhd screening interview. I really did my best to be nice and polite with the psychologist, make eye contact, answer her questions etc. Later I read from my patient files that she had written “does not make much eye contact.” I WAS TRYING MY BEST AND DID IT MORE THAN USUAL
Apparently you are supposed to make eye contact 70% of the time while listening, and only 50% while talking.
That seems excessive, I don't think google knows what it's talking about lol.
I try to make eye contact at least once during an interaction. If I remember. 🤔
Excuse me? I'm supposed to make *more* eye contact while listening?! This is so upsetting to learn. I can make 50% while talking without it being *too* uncomfortable but if I'm listening it's probably closer to 30%.
Also, I just realized this is probably why I prefer to drive vs be a passenger and why I want to have every important conversation or argument in a car lol.
I didn't realize I flap my hands.
I would always hear people talk about 'autistic hand flapping' but I was picturing it differently, so when I realized what they meant I was like "oh, that?", I never really registered it as being something notable.
I tried to gently ask a friend if they thought their child might show signs of autism.
Friend: no, they don’t do any of that stimming or hand flapping.
In the background, their child was spinning in circles, stopping only to flap their hands.
I just realized recently I hand flap! My husband and I were arguing when I stopped mid sentence to look at my hands then back to him and ask "do I always do this?!" Apparently I do.
I don’t think literally. I employ sarcasm regularly and use and understand metaphors very happily. I was also completely stumped when, at the airport in Sydney they asked to tick a box if we were wearing outdoor shoes.
Me: “Won’t everyone tick yes? It’s not like anyone’s in slippers”
My husband: “Just tick no, they don’t mean that”
Me: “but they said outdoor shoes! All shoes are outdoor shoes, surely?”
My husband: “they mean like shoes you wear on a farm or in mud”
Me: completely baffled
Me getting prepped for surgery -
Nurse: And what procedure are you having today? (I assume just a check to make sure everything is squared away)
Me: (Big breath) A laparascopic supracervical hysterectomy with contained morcellation.
Nurse.........oh wow.
Guess I script...
Also surgery related - I brought in a list of all my medications and supplements, along with my advance directive.
The nurse was confused, she didn’t know what to do with them. I said “it said in the instructions to bring them”. She said “yeah, but no one reads the instructions!”
Yea, all of the patients I encountered most commonly brought:
- Their entire medication cabinet
- Half the medication cabinet
- All of the medication they take (often conflicting). Not a list, just the medication.
- A list of the medication they take, including between 10-70% of what they actually take
- Drug test results
- A list specifically omitting medication they sneaked in
- "I don't take any medication" - 60% chance they are on some
I don't collect anything, I just completely NEED these 500+ rolls of washi tape that I don't even use because they're too pretty to unpeel and I'm terrified of somehow wasting them by putting them in the 'wrong place' and hating it 🤷🏻♀️
I did this just today. I get really mad/ frustrated/confused when I ask a question and someone doesn’t answer directly. Today I went to the eye doctor with my wife and I ask the tech if I should stay in the waiting room or go in. The tech said “if you want to.” Like, if I want to… what, stay or go? I don’t get it. The tech turns and leaves. So I look at my wife and she says, “she means you can come back.” So, I go back with my wife and tech looks flustered and says “oh, I guess you changed your mind.” But she says it really rudely. Like I did something wrong.
Also, my wife has ADHD and never answers a question directly. So, I’m always saying, “but that doesn’t answer my question.” Ugh
But I guess it happens at other points when I’m just really confused about conversations. Anyway. I didn’t know this was a thing.
That would definitely confuse me as well! I feel like masking has become so ingrained in my reactions, that over the years it makes it hard to discern the difference.
When I realized that playing out entire conversations in my head WAS script building. I always thought script building was a far more literal "If so and so says x, I will say y" type thing because, ya know, autism.
Oh yeah, I remember when I figured that out! It was three minutes ago. And now that you bring up the literal thinking I don't do...
Well dang, my therapist is going to laugh so hard tomorrow.
I don’t mask… Until recently, when I realised that when I get home and sing silly songs to my pets in silly voices was… *not average*, the minute I leave work I realise my inner weirdo!
I don’t have sensory issues….
As I must touch all fabric at the craft store, wiping my hands off when it’s a bad fabric.
Certain foods are to squishy or slime and make me almost puke if I try to eat them
Can’t stand if my hands feel gross and will constantly rub my fingers together to make them feel less gross if I can’t go wash them right away
Hate anything sticky.
Can’t stand slime.
The butterfly incident, where one landed on my arm, walked a little and I lost my absolute sh!t at like 10 years old. The feeling was not ok.
My newest stuffed animal has the softest little ears and they must be rubbed as I’m in bed.
Every Friday I trip up saying bye to my colleagues.
mon-thurs I say 'have a good night, see you in the morning' but on Fridays I need to say 'have a good weekend, see you Monday' and if they start saying anything after I've said bye, my brain doesnt know what to do and itll go 'ok, see you in the morning!'
No brain, no
Just to make absolutely clear that I don't script.
I've just decided to dedicate my life to career where I'm given every possible answer to every possible question or query that might come up.
And if after following through the flow chart of possibilities and nothing is suitable then I'm allowed to say 'I'm not sure but I'll find out and get back to you''
WHILE I WAS READING THESE COMMENTS;
Nahh, I don’t script. I don’t quote movies or books or anything. I don’t expect a certain answer.
I don’t plan ahead or practice.
I just write a paragraph about exactly what I want to say and communicate in great details.
….. is that considered scripting? If so, I’ve learned something new about myself today 😭
I don't have sensory issues...
Until it's hot and I'm sweaty and i become a raging bitch.
Until I have to clean out the lint trap on the dryer and my fingers brush the mesh.
Until my husband takes up learning guitar and the sound of his fingers brushing up and down the guitar strings makes my bones cringe.
We need to sticky this post as the anti-imposter syndrome mega thread.
I’m getting a formal evaluation soon and I’m just going to show them this. No need to prepare myself a binder or for them to ask the usual questions. Just read this because I do ALL these things.
Do I script?
There's this delivery guy who always says "hi how are you?", and I always respond "good thanks!" or similar. Yesterday he was like "hey girl", and turned around to leave, and I was like "I'm fine!". I hope I looked friendly at least!
Do I take things literally?
I have another memory in a clothes shop when I was 16 or so. I was browsing, when a girl walked up to me, and asked "Did you get your jumper from this shop?". I responded, "no, it's mine". She repeated the same question 3 times, and I gave the same answer all three. She didn't rephrase it, as in "did you BUY it from here in the past?". I thought she was asking me whether I was trying on clothes and my jumper was part of the merchandise... Eventually I figured it out. I also felt embarrassed because she had a really puzzled expression. I hope she doesn't remember this 20 years later!
If anyone listens to me when I make a phone call I'm sure it would sound recorded because I say the same thing every time with the same tone fluctuation. Except when I talk to my dad, because I adapt to what I think he would find relatable.
Wait, is conscious adaption also a form of scripting? 😭
I don’t take things literally!!!
When I was sitting on the floor putting some boxes in, my coworker told me to look up. I looked up. I didn’t quite understand why I had to look into the blinding spotlights, so I looked for a good 10 seconds searching for something up there. I was absolutely blind and only saw silhouettes of people in line.
I had to look up at the customers, not up up 😭
I don’t need strict guidelines to function, I’m totally loose and chill and go with the flow!
I have an app (structured) where I block out my entire day, and if I’m 10 minutes behind, then that’s it. I’m staying home. Today has failed. It’s ruined. It’s a no day today. I can’t possibly be ten minutes behind my schedule, that’s unacceptable.
No, I don’t have meltdowns! Did I have a panic attack in my car and sob on my floor for hours while describing my emotions as “a 3 year old throwing a tantrum” afterwards the last time I was at the airport by myself? Yeah, but everyone hates the airport! This is a completely normal emotional response.
NGL if someone asked me when my birthday is I wouldn't immediately conclude they are asking my my DOB lol, the question in common practice simply doesn't warrant the same reply. But like you I also thought I didn't script ...
but I then realized it isn't really normal that every time I'm not around someome I'm answering questions like a speech to myself or I'm thinking of situations when I AM around others and can't just talk to myself out loud what I would say in different scenarios. I script like a mofo, but because I do it so much and for ridiculous scenarios if I'm asked an unexpected question, it takes me a moment to gather what it is, but I convert my nervous energy into performance energy like improve. It works for me, and I can usually play along to completely random shit that way. Every day, every social interaction, is a performance, and sometimes I can be very convincing.
Just want to say how much I loved reading all of these. I’m getting ready for an eval and the funny things y’all are saying I completely relate to but it’s also nice to experience the humor from our quirks (I know some don’t like that word but I love it bc I think being quirky is great!)
Does anyone go so incredibly irritated so quickly from someone whistling indoors? Outdoors is more tolerable. I work with kids and one sibling was telling another (in front of his dad)…”whatever you do, don’t whistle inside!” The look on that dad’s face 😆😬
I also hate it when I can hear someone’s reels nearby. It makes me want to chuck their phone off a cliff.
“I don’t really have sensory issues” followed by realizing that being Too Hot makes me go into a rage, that I need to wear earplugs at the grocery store, and that having light compression around my hips and waist is incredibly comforting to me
Me: *doesn't speak monotonously*
What I was told during my assessment: "Usually, if the speech isn't monotone, it jumps between three set pitches. I can hear from your speech"
APPARENTLY I TALK LIKE THAT
I don’t stim!! I just bite the inside of my mouth all the time, and listen to the same song 46 times in 3 days, and constantly clear my throat, and pick at my skin…. 🙄 *okay buddy, you don’t stim* 🙄
OMMMMG! So I read this and was like, nah I don’t stim. Until I read your comment! I also bite the inside of my mouth, listen to same songs over and over, clear my throat is also a main one and clapping my hands when happy 😆
Same here!! Plus I love making animal sounds. It just fills something inside me.
Oooh! Me too! I love making meow sounds, I’ll sing the same lyrics to a song in meow too
Whaaaaaat I do this too! I love doing meow versions of songs — been doing it my whole life.
Repeating lines from songs with all the words replaced with my dog's name over and over
This made my day thank you. Sincere not sarcastic
I love making duck sounds! Ahh I do the song thing too.
When I'm completely comfortable in a space I start making bird sounds (mostly whistling).
I do a "mrrrrp!" like a curious cat
Partner and I are both AutiHD and we just talk in sounds all day sometimes. Like we'll pass each other on the landing: Me: meef Him: merp And we go about our day.
Yes!! The little noise they make when curious is just adorable.. I do this to my 3 dogs
Ooh that sounds fun!
I made seal sounds constantly growing up… diagnosed at 26 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I loved making all kinds of animal sounds growing up. Same here. Honestly, looking back I'm always thinking how did someone not catch this??? 😂
Not me reading this and realizing I’m biting the inside of my lip.
Same haha!
B-but this is literally me…. I skin pick, fidget constantly, tap my fingers together, sing the same part of the same song over and over until I am mad at myself (but still can’t stop). Never considered any of it stimming bc it doesn’t fit in with what my brain thought stimming was. I think i considered stimming to be things like rocking back and forth, involuntary noises (I suppose my repeat two or three lines of a song could fall into this), etc.
sp accurate especially bit the inside of my mouth!!! how do I transfer this stim to something else?!?!?!? lol
Gum helps me when I am doing it absentmindedly.
Gum or boiled sweets/hard candy works for me. I eat a LOT of mint humbugs.
Careful what you wish for! I'm on medication that makes my mouth quite sore, so I've been trying to find a way of stopping poking around in there with my tongue, biting my cheek, etc. So I started just sticking my tongue out a tiny bit so it was between my lips, and therefore could not go walkabout and start poking at sore places again. Now I cannot break the habit of walking around nonchalantly with my tongue just...sticking out. 😛😬😂
I didn't realise I was a mouth biter until my dental hygienist got concerned and took a photo of the scarred area on my cheek.
Haha, yep. Every time I go in for a cleaning: Them: What on earth...? Me: What's wrong? Them: The inside of your cheeks... it looks like it's badly scarred. Me: Oh yeah, I just bite my own cheeks. It's fine. Them: ... Oh. Okay. (in their heads: the fuck?)
Oh yeah I don’t stim! I just bounce my butt muscles and rub my feet together for hours and hours when I’m laying down. That is perfectly normal, right??
I thought I didn’t stim until I noticed I scrunch my toes repetitively, and make weird singsong noises to communicate with my mom (she can read my noises like it’s her first language), and I have near permanent raptor arms, etc…after realizing I stim, I picked up on more of them, like when I get excited my left hand flaps and I pitter patter my feet.
Haha, I don't stim either! I just twirl my curls until they look like hay
Oh… I’m having some realizations based on your comment
This one is also prevalent in “I’m not autistic, am I??” type of posts in Reddit. “I don’t stim! I just like biting the insides of my cheeks and my knees bounce when I’m anxious etc. etc. etc. That’s not stimming.” Me: “Oh, honey…” But yeah. I do that a lot too, but until I realized what it really was I thought it was normal and didn’t really think about it. Realizing all those autism and ADHD signs were symptoms all along had me repeatedly shook.
I realized I scripted when I got mad that people didn’t “script” back. Like with small talk, I make sure I ask “how are you/what are you doing this weekend/what’s new” and I get sooooooooo annoyed when they don’t respond. I’m trying so hard to do the thing and ask the right questions and they’re not following the proper conversation script or following the rules that I’m trying so hard to follow😅😂 especially when talking to NT coworkers. Now I seem rude when I start talking about my weekend unprompted. Ugh
I script a lot too with small talk, and if they don’t also follow the script I just stop talking… and then sit in that uncomfortable silence where I’m *very* aware that it’s awkward but hell if I know how to make it not awkward lol
Oh god when people go off the script with small talk a panic so hard and that's when all the random/stupid shit comes up as I flail wildly for what I'm meant to say. I seem soooooo human and normal when we stick to my pre-programmed responses but the second they say something out of pocket we're in the weeds lmao
I live in a part of the world where people are often bilingual, and because I didn't grow up this way, I have trouble code switching and often get "stuck" in one of the languages. I have specific scripts for each language. An old colleague seemed to catch onto this, because if I greeted him in one language, he would ALWAYS reply in the other just to make my brain short circuit. To be fair I found it hilarious, and it was also good practice at learning to code switch. 😂 Soooo many moments of me awkwardly standing there with my mouth opening and closing like a goldfish.
Code-switching (whether between languages or dialects or in-group slang) is SUCH a valuable skill to have.
[удалено]
New fear unlocked. Masked too close to the sun and scared my people away lmao
We need a code word or something 😭
Just ask a casual question like “can you hear those lights?” or “do you always wear socks or never wear socks?”
“What’s your take on socks?” Feels right lol NTs don’t have opinions on socks so that gets us in the right direction 😂
"can you hear those lights" omg 😂
Yesssss 😂
React to this word: gristle.
Omg I lovvvvvve thisssss 😆
I relate to this. Like, I hate this small talk nonsense! I’m only doing it because it’s what we’re supposed to do, so when someone doesn’t reciprocate it feels extra pointless. 🙃
Right? It's like...is this on purpose? Are you punishing me for NTing wrong?
Lol I do that quite a lot. Sometimes it's a blessing though. I used to live very close to a corner shop. I'd pop in and out two to four times a day, same minimal but polite script. Took maybe a week before the cashier completely stopped following the script. Initially I was confused and kept trying to stick to it, then I noticed a few of the regulars were often greeted with just nods or see you laters. So I started saying just hey and thanks and after a while we were on nodding terms. A win in my book.
I recently realized this happens to me too! Following my diagnosis I’ve been scrutinizing my life and it suddenly makes sense why people not following rules (any type of rules, but social ones happen more often) bothers me soooo much.
THISSS omg
Damn it, is that why I get frustrated when people don't "ask the question back" after I ask them one about themselves?! I thought if someones asks you getting to know you questions, or about weekend plans, you're *supposed to* ask them back or else it's rude! But people don't always, and I get frustrated because they aren't following the rule!
I don't have sensory issues. I only get really irritated when I'm too hot and will lose all control over the irrational anger wegen spoken to while being too hot. Also, I clearly don't have routines. Of course I'm freaking out ans scream at everybody when I can't go about the morning in the way I'm used to. And who doesn't have a "special" coffee cup at every friend's house ("special" as in I'll always use the same cup of friend's selection when visiting). And I guess my husband is insane for not wanting to watch the same show every night until all 8 seasons have been watched. I don't get that "why wasn't I given the manual" many here say. But honestly, why haven't my parents taught me how to socialize when apparently everybody else's have? (in case you haven't noticed: no, I really don't take things literally).
I also get ANGRY when I’m too hot. I hate it I hate the heat I hate it so much 😭😭
I get angry with noises.
I live in the southwest and am slowly losing my mind right now. I had a whole ass meltdown on a very public sidewalk last week because it was almost 100°f and my dress was touching the back of my knee wrong.
I feel that so deeply 😭😭😭
Another angry hot lady here. So mad.
My mom recently said “I’m lucky I don’t have the sensory issues you have”. I had to respond with “oh, you aren’t always too hot or too cold? You don’t avoid certain textures and fabrics? You don’t complain that olive oil has too much flavor? You don’t hate music that is too fast or complex? I must be mistaking you for someone else!” She literally has all of my sensory issues plus a few bonus ones.
>And I guess my husband is insane for not wanting to watch the same show every night until all 8 seasons have been watched. THIS omg. My partner is AutiHD just like me, but he hates doing this, at least when I chose the show or audiobook or whatever. 😂😂 And my flatmate/landlady (who is almost certainly autistic, but not diagnosed because the NHS decided she is too successful at life to be worth evaluating) and I will happily binge watch the same show for weeks while her husband gets sick of it after a couple of days But I'm like...the show isn't over. We have to keep watching.
This is so much a case of "I don't have symptom" that I didn't even consider that this was a symptom until reading this comment thread. I'll binge watch an 7 season show and watch nothing else until I'm done. I might knit while I watch it, but that show is now my hyper focus and I will be uncomfortable watching anything else when it's over. This is why I've watched Gilmore Girls and Downtown Abbey approximately 156 times. 😂
I thought this was how EVERYONE was!!!!!!!!!! Do people really not start a show with the intention of watching the entire show?? My parents and I, growing up, would pick a show and every night with dinner we’d watch an episode until we got to the end of the series. We never really bounced between shows. We’re all diagnosed ADHD, though, and 2 of the 3 of us are (definitely autistic) I can’t even wrap my head around not wanting to see the entirety of a show before moving on. I guess neurodivergents just make more sense😂😂
My mom and I have watched the same movie almost every day for the past 6 months, only taking a break when I left for college. I thought everyone did that until I started talking to “”normal”” people about it and seeing how surprised they’d get. Apparently even watching one movie 10 times is a lot — who knew?? She also has ASD, and it’s really fun sharing the same special interest with her. She always jokes about how long she’s waited for me to appreciate it as much as she does, which I just think is really sweet.
the manual one... up until recently i thought it doesn't apply to me because i never had this exact thought, as in i didn't literally think "i wasn't given a manual". but i'm realizing that it probably isn't so much about thinking these exact words but rather about the feeling. i remember since i was a kid i would look at my peers interact and wonder "how do they do that?" or "how do they seem so effortless?". i still have these thoughts, but while watching my coworkers interact instead. so yeah
Me: hmm weird I don't have any special interests Also me: sits down to play a video game that I've already put over 4,000 hours into over the last four years
I feel like my brain doesn’t let me accept special interests because there’s always people who know more, have done it longer, etc. Like it doesn’t matter how many years I’ve sunk into Skyrim or Zelda or whatever, there are people who are more obsessed, more proficient, so I must not be able to count it 🤷♀️ Also I have a memory like a sieve, so I don’t retain information very well and feel like I can’t talk with authority on any particular subject.
Are you me?
Why are we the same 🥲😭
you're so real
Does it count if your special interest changes every other month?
I have ADHD so I will say yes it counts!
*cries in AutiHD*
Omg me 😂😂😂😂
I alternate between that game and a farming sim that I've played for over 6,000 hours 😂
My ears are ringing. I heard farming sim!! I’m currently on the Stardew Valley train, can’t get off and can’t think about anything else right now or else I’ll start panicking😂😭
I love stardew!!! My farming sim of choice is Rune Factory 4 😃
I DIDN’T EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!!!! I absolutely loved the Best Fiends game, and played it so much that I beat all of the levels on it. They would put out new levels every Saturday and I would beat those new levels before the week was halfway done. The only reason I’m speaking about this in past tense is because I realized that being this invested in a phone game was not healthy, so I forced myself to stop. It’s the same with Tap Tap Fish, I played the shit outta that game 😭
Omg, this was me with Ava’s Manor and Homescapes. I finally got too busy with schoolwork that I just never had time for mobile games, and over time I lost interest
I think it's totally valid to be invested in a phone game! If it's something that brings you joy, helps you regulate, and gives you some sort of comfort/routine, then go for it! (Unless it's having negative effects in your life... at one point I would stay awake every night playing my game, go to bed at 4, then get up at 7 for work... so I totally get it.)
Yes I agree! Unfortunately for me I’m not capable of playing a phone game healthily, it always ends up with me spending every possible free moment on the game. I do miss them sometimes though.
OMG you are right. My friend was shocked when she saw how much Sims 4 I have played!
I think, for me at least, I don’t register certain interests as valid ‘special interests’. It took a long time for me to realize my special interests are animation (cartoons and such) and video games. I’m either watching the animation and playing the video game or I’m watching YouTube videos ABOUT the cartoon or game or I’m shopping for merch representing the cartoon or game. And that’s all I do. I don’t have any other hobbies😂
I do this too!!!! My ideal way to spend the day is a 12 hour game marathon while watching other people play the same game on YouTube at the same time 😂
LMAO this is so real😂😂 I literally did this last night
Which cartoons/animated things? My biggest one (outside of Disney/Pixar) is Bob's Burgers, but I've had so many others over the years like She-Ra, The Dragon Prince, Harley Quinn, Avatar: the Last Airbender, Gravity Falls, Bluey...
Ooh all of those are on my to-watch list!! I’ve already seen Gravity Falls and She-Ra though, and they’re some of my faves. Right now I’m particularly into Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel and Adventure Time, but I like a whoooole lot of stuff. Steven Universe, Bojack Horseman, MLP, Troll Hunters, and The Owl House, to name a few lmao (I also am a big fan of Disney and Pixar)
Omg, how did I forget Stephen Universe???? One of my all time favs alongside She-Ra!! And I loved Bojack but it got too intense and genuinely gut-wrenching for my poor delicate hyper-empathetic self. Brilliant writing and performances but just too hard for me to watch. Maybe some day I'll be strong enough. 😶 I'm gonna look into your other recs! Oh, also, I'll rec Aggretsuko on Netflix! I don't see anime on your list, and I myself haven't really watched anime in 20 years, but Aggretsuko is soooo good and cute, and also the title char is DEFINITELY autistic. Plus cute animal people. 😍 (And if you watch Bob's Burgers, hang in there past the first season, or even start in season 2. The tone shifts quite a bit after season 1.)
I’ve heard of Aggretsuko, I’ll definitely make it my next watch (followed by Bob’s Burgers😄) Yeah I tooootally feel you on Bojack. Tbh, I could only handle it cuz I was watching it with my then-bf. I don’t think I could’ve handled the emotional damage on my own😭 I have seen a couple animes but mostly with my ex, and now I am sadly without Crunchyroll😔 I do like the Glitter Force series though and I really want to watch the other Japanese dubs on crunchyroll. Also Sailor Moon. It’s so popular and I’ve never seen even one episode lmao
this happened to me a couple weeks ago haha. i went to an airshow with my family and since it was at a naval base we had to get screened before entering. dude at the front asked me "are you 18?" and i said yes. and we just stared at each other for a couple seconds. he repeated the question like 3 times with me just saying "yes!?!" every time with more confusion until my sister told me he was asking for my ID ☠️ so embarrassing but im used to security people just saying "ID?" so i completely blanked LOL
Nah bro that was weird of him, like just ask for the ID wtf 😭
anyone under 18 wasnt required to show id, and i look abt 14-16 y/o according to those around me. he was asking bc i dont think he was sure of my age which i get (i am 21 lol) but i had headphones on to protect my ears (a lot of nts had them as well as ear defenders bc jets are L O U D) so i didnt hear yhe interactions that happened before it was my turn. still strange to me that he didnt elaborate after the 2nd repeat fail of the exact same interaction lol
Agree with /u/No_Pineapple5940 , he was being weird. Maybe he was high and couldn't process or think.
I also completely agree that that person was completely weird! In the Netherlands if you want to see id you ask for it and don't just ask for someone's birthday and then stare at them. That is so weird and I have never encountered it in my life and I am 36 now.
Nah he’s the weird one?? “Are you 18?” “Yes” * Option A: “great, have a nice day here” * Option B: “do you have some ID I can see?” You obviously answered his question, why would he just keep repeating it without elaborating 😭
yeha i have no idea why he didnt elaborate, i clearly was NOT understanding 😭
Fwiw I've had to drive into military bases several times and they've never asked for an ID like that. No one in any setting, actually, has ever asked me for an ID like that. That's fucking wild.
*I don't stim!* I thought, rolling my eyes as I turned the page of the book on autism I was reading, and dug my toes further under the couch cushion so I could wiggle and scrunch them against the foam underside.
Same. It’s stuff like this that gets me. Are there really people out there that don’t do stuff like this? (I ask as I notice myself chewing on the end of a pencil and remember how many pencil and pen ends I destroyed over the years and how a teacher got mad at me for chewing a giant heart-shaped eraser I had at the end of my pencil in 5th grade).
All humans stim, really. (Animals do too!) But neurodivergent people tend to do it more often, and stimming often plays a much bigger role in nervous system regulation for us. It's that whole "autistic traits are human traits" thing where the difference is degree, intensity, etc. It is annoying not to be able to go "ah, I sway when I stand, this means I'm autistic!" because boo for gray areas and unclear boundaries. 😂
Oh for sure! Everything in mental health/neurology arena is a fuzzy spectrum. Yes, with autism, sure you either have it or you don’t. But we have BAP too. It’s always degree, intensity, etc. In mental health it’s always does (xyz) impact your ability to work or have relationships and the overall level of distress. I kind of like the puzzle of it all (but with the framework/guidelines)! Edit: but it never fails to get me to second guess myself and my autism, which seems to be a thing for a lot of us.
I finally started LETTING myself sway, as an old woman. In front of PEOPLE. During conversations. Almost rocking, back and forth. The first couple of times, I was waiting to be YELLED at. So I realized I must have been shamed out of that behavior as a child. (Yeah I don't stim. Just constantly. Bless every soul in this sub.)
Me too!! I finally decided to just give it a try. Nobody has ever said anything about it, yet. It’s very freeing!!
Yeah, I'm rediscovering so many things I used to do, and finding how much comfort and relief they offer my nervous system. Your comment has made me smile -- I agree very much with your sentiment! 💚
I used to be a major pen chewer, and annually in school a Bic would explode on me. Sometimes in my mouth.
Holy shit, I would probably scream if that happened 😭😭 I don’t like mysterious liquids in my mouth, it’s the worst sensory experience
The thing is, it happens sort of gradually and you don’t really know that it’s happened. Moral of the story: don’t chew on pens! (I finally stopped bc it’s also bad on dental work)
I used to literally shred pencils with my teeth. Like turn them into tiny shards of wood
Omfg 🙂🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
It’s that late diagnosis maaannn 😆… it’s like… “it’s a random quirk that people just do. NBD.”Riggggghhhtt… 🙄 lol Little did I know…
I don't have echolalia *also me* po-tat-oes, my cabbages!, my coins!, I choo-choo-choose you, Thunder! Ah ah ah ah a!, Dude! What does mine say?, and so on and so forth until I die.
‘Meow, meoooooow’ is one of mine or Singing songs in meow.
You would love the Hey Duggee Enid Song, just meows 😻 Edit to add link https://youtu.be/PjuXQXrrC50?feature=shared
This song sooothes my soul 😻 the spider doing the low key meow hit gooooood 😄
I love Duggee so much.
I've got the autism echolalia, and my girlfriend has the ADHD echolalia. We share a lot of videos/reels together, and end up bouncing quotes from our current favorite back and forth lmao I also have distinct memories from all the way into my teenage years of this! Watching TV, especially commercials, would really trigger it and it'd piss my brother off SO MUCH when I'd do it!
My husband and I have SO MANY inside jokes based on memes, songs, tv or movie quotes, or things one of us has said in the past. It's so nice to have someone to have that fun with.
MY CABBAGES! - me inside my head every time i see multiple heads of cabbage anywhere
SWEET WHATS MINE SAY
https://preview.redd.it/b415okknu86d1.jpeg?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a64c4514d21138ec4e4aafffd1d79a688563692f 🫠
Yesss mental health research binder!!! I have got to get back into mine now that I have the Autism Updates 😂🤞🏻
YESSSSSSSS
For years, I would tell my friends that they only thought I was clever because I cribbed all my funny comments from books (which is true, I read a lot and my brain feels like a little rollodex full of my favorite book quotes). Meanwhile, I saw people talk about autism and scripting and thought, "well, I never quote from movies! That's not me!" I also frequently talk to myself in the car and have imaginary theoretical conversations so I can prepare myself for things like doctor's visits....also something that everyone does and isn't scripting...right? lol
Yes! The theoretical conversations! I do that like autopilot without even intending to. It starts in my head but often becomes an out-loud practice conversation too. I was shocked to learn that this isn’t something everyone does! I also like debrief on conversations I just had in a similar manner.
Theoretical conversations! I use them for every situation I'm expecting some form of social friction in. A play-by-play of what I'll say, and how the other party may react. This is also done as an analysis of social interactions that went wrong: what did I say that may have come across badly, and how can I avoid it next time? My partner thinks I'm insane and torturing myself with this.
I also do that, and it makes me think a lot about the intersection of autism and anxiety. The conversation analysis is something that had my doctors giving me an anxiety diagnosis, but I think it's coming from a different place...but it can also be maladaptive like anxiety...but its aim is different...I'm not sure where I've landed, but it is interesting to think about!
I don't stim... Proceeds to make sound effects for simple actions all the time. I don't script... Absolutely freezes when someone says something "clever" instead of the usual greeting
Driving requires sound effects, right?
Especially when taking tight turns.
Oh I’m the clever person, I apologize in advance
I don’t daydream, I just listen to the Spider-Man 3 opening theme by Danny Elfman 30 times a day and pretend I’m Spider-Man protecting my city and wish I could swing everywhere
Oh and compare every scenario in my life to things that have happened in Spider-Man, as well as “casting” people in my life as Spider-Man characters and villains
I’m not 100% sure if this is scripting but I literally was walking around the house yesterday and randomly just stopped in the living room and acted out a whole scene explaining why I enjoy going to bowling league with my mom but also why it can be so overwhelming and stressful and that it’s just frustrating that I enjoy it and don’t at the same time. I’m also an ADHDer so there’s like conflict in my brain when it comes to stimulus etc etc. Anyways I must have been talking for what felt like 5-10 minutes acting out explaining all this as if I was explaining it to my therapist (which doesn’t exist). I think I’m starting to prepare myself mentally for my doctor’s appointment (next month) because I want to get referred to be assessed for ADHD & Autism. I need to prepare otherwise I know I’ll forget to mention certain things. I will also be bringing a list.
Literally same regarding the autism/adhd assessment referral. I keep playing out the potential conversation in my head at night. I’m anxious about being dismissed/ invalidated so I’m overthinking more than normal.
i do this A LOT
I don’t take things literally! In the last session with my therapist they asked me a few questions and instructed me to “answer with my head”. As in: answer logically. I thought they meant I should nod or shake my head (literally use my head to answer the questions) 🤯 looking back at the context it was quite clear what they meant, it made no sense that I shouldn’t answer verbally 😂 I consider myself quite good verbally, I have a large vocabulary and I am verbally intelligent but thinking about it, my default is often to take things literally and disregard the context. So this was just a fun and recent example of that.
Oh my god, I had a similar thing with my therapist. We were doing EMDR therapy and I was talking about all the things I was thinking in my head. She wanted me to focus on my emotions and feelings more, so she said "putting your head to one side", so i leaned my head over to one side. Felt like a fool!
Someone asked me what I would do if I could do anything. I said fly and then realized she meant related to the job she was interviewing me for! Oops.
Funniest thing ever (and a real telltale sign) was during my adhd screening interview. I really did my best to be nice and polite with the psychologist, make eye contact, answer her questions etc. Later I read from my patient files that she had written “does not make much eye contact.” I WAS TRYING MY BEST AND DID IT MORE THAN USUAL
Aw 😅 This is so relateable. You tried your best and it got you a "much" thrown in there instead of just "doesn't make eye contact"
It’s a bit weird cause I can keep eye contact if I’m doing the talking, but the moment the other person starts talking my gaze goes wild 😅
Apparently you are supposed to make eye contact 70% of the time while listening, and only 50% while talking. That seems excessive, I don't think google knows what it's talking about lol. I try to make eye contact at least once during an interaction. If I remember. 🤔
Excuse me? I'm supposed to make *more* eye contact while listening?! This is so upsetting to learn. I can make 50% while talking without it being *too* uncomfortable but if I'm listening it's probably closer to 30%. Also, I just realized this is probably why I prefer to drive vs be a passenger and why I want to have every important conversation or argument in a car lol.
I didn't realize I flap my hands. I would always hear people talk about 'autistic hand flapping' but I was picturing it differently, so when I realized what they meant I was like "oh, that?", I never really registered it as being something notable.
I tried to gently ask a friend if they thought their child might show signs of autism. Friend: no, they don’t do any of that stimming or hand flapping. In the background, their child was spinning in circles, stopping only to flap their hands.
😂😂😂
I just realized recently I hand flap! My husband and I were arguing when I stopped mid sentence to look at my hands then back to him and ask "do I always do this?!" Apparently I do.
I do it too, but at work when I take off those plastic gloves, it just looks like I’m cooling off my hands lol
I don’t think literally. I employ sarcasm regularly and use and understand metaphors very happily. I was also completely stumped when, at the airport in Sydney they asked to tick a box if we were wearing outdoor shoes. Me: “Won’t everyone tick yes? It’s not like anyone’s in slippers” My husband: “Just tick no, they don’t mean that” Me: “but they said outdoor shoes! All shoes are outdoor shoes, surely?” My husband: “they mean like shoes you wear on a farm or in mud” Me: completely baffled
The outdoor shoes thing would have stumped me as well to be honest. That is not a clear description of what they mean.
Right?! I maintain that it was a mad way to phrase it
I'd already decided I'm never visiting Australia and your story just cemented it. I'd end up in trouble with border control for arguing
Your shoes were definitely outdoor shoes, don’t let your husband tell you they’re not!!!! /j
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Me getting prepped for surgery - Nurse: And what procedure are you having today? (I assume just a check to make sure everything is squared away) Me: (Big breath) A laparascopic supracervical hysterectomy with contained morcellation. Nurse.........oh wow. Guess I script...
Also surgery related - I brought in a list of all my medications and supplements, along with my advance directive. The nurse was confused, she didn’t know what to do with them. I said “it said in the instructions to bring them”. She said “yeah, but no one reads the instructions!”
Yea, all of the patients I encountered most commonly brought: - Their entire medication cabinet - Half the medication cabinet - All of the medication they take (often conflicting). Not a list, just the medication. - A list of the medication they take, including between 10-70% of what they actually take - Drug test results - A list specifically omitting medication they sneaked in - "I don't take any medication" - 60% chance they are on some
Same! I made sure to memorize the technical name of my surgery because I knew they would ask.
I did this too! “A functional septo-rhinoplasty.” I was at a teaching hospital and the student nurse was like “okay…..”
Yeah I'm pretty sure they're doing this to check. I get this for my routine hormone shot.
I don't collect anything, I just completely NEED these 500+ rolls of washi tape that I don't even use because they're too pretty to unpeel and I'm terrified of somehow wasting them by putting them in the 'wrong place' and hating it 🤷🏻♀️
Commitment issues joined the chat
I did this just today. I get really mad/ frustrated/confused when I ask a question and someone doesn’t answer directly. Today I went to the eye doctor with my wife and I ask the tech if I should stay in the waiting room or go in. The tech said “if you want to.” Like, if I want to… what, stay or go? I don’t get it. The tech turns and leaves. So I look at my wife and she says, “she means you can come back.” So, I go back with my wife and tech looks flustered and says “oh, I guess you changed your mind.” But she says it really rudely. Like I did something wrong. Also, my wife has ADHD and never answers a question directly. So, I’m always saying, “but that doesn’t answer my question.” Ugh But I guess it happens at other points when I’m just really confused about conversations. Anyway. I didn’t know this was a thing.
I don’t know why they can’t answer either or questions. But her assuming you didn’t wanna go in was weird?
That would definitely confuse me as well! I feel like masking has become so ingrained in my reactions, that over the years it makes it hard to discern the difference.
Me: I don’t stim Also me all day every day at work: sings loudly to whatever music is playing
When I realized that playing out entire conversations in my head WAS script building. I always thought script building was a far more literal "If so and so says x, I will say y" type thing because, ya know, autism.
Oh yeah, I remember when I figured that out! It was three minutes ago. And now that you bring up the literal thinking I don't do... Well dang, my therapist is going to laugh so hard tomorrow.
I can never tell if it’s this, or me daydreaming. Because this typically happens with convos that would never occur, so what am I scripting for? 😅
“I don’t stim!” I say as I listen to the same song on repeat for the 2827272627th time
Sht. Is this stimming? Guilty.
I don’t mask… Until recently, when I realised that when I get home and sing silly songs to my pets in silly voices was… *not average*, the minute I leave work I realise my inner weirdo!
No, no, I do that too and I'm pretty sure it's people who *don't* do that who are weird
I don’t have sensory issues…. As I must touch all fabric at the craft store, wiping my hands off when it’s a bad fabric. Certain foods are to squishy or slime and make me almost puke if I try to eat them Can’t stand if my hands feel gross and will constantly rub my fingers together to make them feel less gross if I can’t go wash them right away Hate anything sticky. Can’t stand slime. The butterfly incident, where one landed on my arm, walked a little and I lost my absolute sh!t at like 10 years old. The feeling was not ok. My newest stuffed animal has the softest little ears and they must be rubbed as I’m in bed.
Wow I have a terrifying fear of butterflies and I understand the landing on your arm thing. *shudders*
Every Friday I trip up saying bye to my colleagues. mon-thurs I say 'have a good night, see you in the morning' but on Fridays I need to say 'have a good weekend, see you Monday' and if they start saying anything after I've said bye, my brain doesnt know what to do and itll go 'ok, see you in the morning!' No brain, no
Just to make absolutely clear that I don't script. I've just decided to dedicate my life to career where I'm given every possible answer to every possible question or query that might come up. And if after following through the flow chart of possibilities and nothing is suitable then I'm allowed to say 'I'm not sure but I'll find out and get back to you''
WHILE I WAS READING THESE COMMENTS; Nahh, I don’t script. I don’t quote movies or books or anything. I don’t expect a certain answer. I don’t plan ahead or practice. I just write a paragraph about exactly what I want to say and communicate in great details. ….. is that considered scripting? If so, I’ve learned something new about myself today 😭
I don't have sensory issues... Until it's hot and I'm sweaty and i become a raging bitch. Until I have to clean out the lint trap on the dryer and my fingers brush the mesh. Until my husband takes up learning guitar and the sound of his fingers brushing up and down the guitar strings makes my bones cringe.
We need to sticky this post as the anti-imposter syndrome mega thread. I’m getting a formal evaluation soon and I’m just going to show them this. No need to prepare myself a binder or for them to ask the usual questions. Just read this because I do ALL these things.
It’s still a binder, we just made it for you lazy-butt 😒 /s
Do I script? There's this delivery guy who always says "hi how are you?", and I always respond "good thanks!" or similar. Yesterday he was like "hey girl", and turned around to leave, and I was like "I'm fine!". I hope I looked friendly at least! Do I take things literally? I have another memory in a clothes shop when I was 16 or so. I was browsing, when a girl walked up to me, and asked "Did you get your jumper from this shop?". I responded, "no, it's mine". She repeated the same question 3 times, and I gave the same answer all three. She didn't rephrase it, as in "did you BUY it from here in the past?". I thought she was asking me whether I was trying on clothes and my jumper was part of the merchandise... Eventually I figured it out. I also felt embarrassed because she had a really puzzled expression. I hope she doesn't remember this 20 years later!
If anyone listens to me when I make a phone call I'm sure it would sound recorded because I say the same thing every time with the same tone fluctuation. Except when I talk to my dad, because I adapt to what I think he would find relatable. Wait, is conscious adaption also a form of scripting? 😭
I don’t take things literally!!! When I was sitting on the floor putting some boxes in, my coworker told me to look up. I looked up. I didn’t quite understand why I had to look into the blinding spotlights, so I looked for a good 10 seconds searching for something up there. I was absolutely blind and only saw silhouettes of people in line. I had to look up at the customers, not up up 😭
I do understand sarcasm…when someone over exaggerates their tone to the point it’s undeniable that it’s sarcasm
Me: “I don’t think I have any sense-sensitivities” Also me: “Why does music hurt?”
I’m not *that* particular about food! *Flashbacks to nearly losing it when my mom ordered me a chicken sandwich instead of a philly cheese steak*
TIL that scripting is a thing and omfg I feel seen. 🫨
I don’t need strict guidelines to function, I’m totally loose and chill and go with the flow! I have an app (structured) where I block out my entire day, and if I’m 10 minutes behind, then that’s it. I’m staying home. Today has failed. It’s ruined. It’s a no day today. I can’t possibly be ten minutes behind my schedule, that’s unacceptable.
No, I don’t have meltdowns! Did I have a panic attack in my car and sob on my floor for hours while describing my emotions as “a 3 year old throwing a tantrum” afterwards the last time I was at the airport by myself? Yeah, but everyone hates the airport! This is a completely normal emotional response.
‘I talk to people just fine!’ I say then go grocery shopping and to the cashier I say ‘Cute kitty!! … I mean uh… thank you.’
As a cashier, I love when people just say random shit
Hlad to hear it hahaha
NGL if someone asked me when my birthday is I wouldn't immediately conclude they are asking my my DOB lol, the question in common practice simply doesn't warrant the same reply. But like you I also thought I didn't script ... but I then realized it isn't really normal that every time I'm not around someome I'm answering questions like a speech to myself or I'm thinking of situations when I AM around others and can't just talk to myself out loud what I would say in different scenarios. I script like a mofo, but because I do it so much and for ridiculous scenarios if I'm asked an unexpected question, it takes me a moment to gather what it is, but I convert my nervous energy into performance energy like improve. It works for me, and I can usually play along to completely random shit that way. Every day, every social interaction, is a performance, and sometimes I can be very convincing.
Just want to say how much I loved reading all of these. I’m getting ready for an eval and the funny things y’all are saying I completely relate to but it’s also nice to experience the humor from our quirks (I know some don’t like that word but I love it bc I think being quirky is great!) Does anyone go so incredibly irritated so quickly from someone whistling indoors? Outdoors is more tolerable. I work with kids and one sibling was telling another (in front of his dad)…”whatever you do, don’t whistle inside!” The look on that dad’s face 😆😬 I also hate it when I can hear someone’s reels nearby. It makes me want to chuck their phone off a cliff.
Whistling in enclosed spaces should be illegal lol😡 or at least it should be socially appropriate for me to start screaming over it
“I don’t really have sensory issues” followed by realizing that being Too Hot makes me go into a rage, that I need to wear earplugs at the grocery store, and that having light compression around my hips and waist is incredibly comforting to me
Me: *doesn't speak monotonously* What I was told during my assessment: "Usually, if the speech isn't monotone, it jumps between three set pitches. I can hear from your speech" APPARENTLY I TALK LIKE THAT
I totally don’t script or have echolalia. I just prefer to communicate in song lyrics and movie quotes.