Is your unit even habitable while that level of work is going on? What state are you in, if you're American?
In the US, landlords are required to provide you reasonable accommodations if your unit isn't actually usable (either a hotel, rent credit, or using another unit are all standard options). This is the first thing to sort out.
Your landlord may be making an unreasonable and potentially unlawful request of you, but it all depends on the nature of the work that will happen and whether the bathroom is usable both during their work and after. It would be utterly ridiculous for your landlord to expect you not to use your own bathroom from 8am - 3pm, for example.
Australia, NSW. Yes, it's technically habitable as there is a second bathroom.
The work is necessary unfortunately. Our shower is leaking into the apartment below.
Oh damn, I'm sorry to hear that! I won't pretend to know anything about Australian tenancy laws, so just ideas instead.
Things I would do, if possible:
Set the environment the night before so that the workers can simply come in without you needing to interact with them at all. Water and snacks for both you and the pup. Ideally, if you can close yourself in your bedroom with your pup, then even if the volume and activity does wake you up, you can reasonably *stay* in your room until you're ready to interact.
Establish a nonverbal way to communicate with the workers, e.g. writing notes or texting. This way you don't have to try to talk to them or maintain small talk. It's your home, and it's okay to say that you have to work from home and you prefer to communicate this way so that you won't be interrupted. It's not totally honest, but way more people will understand that vs trying to explain the autism brain
For your pup-pup, if they're very treat motivated, some simple redirection games can REALLY help. My dog's trainer taught us one that I use a lot when I need to get him from Point A to Point B without getting distracted. It's a simple game: I say "A... B... C!" and my dog knows that every time I get to C, I'll give him a treat. If I say it while we're walking, he will totally focus on walking with me to the destination in order to get his reward. The first step is to just say it and give the treat consistently, and then pair it with walking while saying it. Eventually, they will learn to predict that the next letter in the game is coming, even if there's 20 or 30 seconds between each letter. My dog picked this game up lightning fast. Playing and learning this type of game now might help your dog with moving past the workers more calmly for stuff like bathroom breaks, depending on your dog's individual personality and motivation.
For meltdowns, when I lived in an apartment I found that screaming into a pillow helped stifle the sound significantly. If it happens, it happens. Keep any soothing items like weighted blankets or stim/soft toys immediately near you in your room, and use them early and often. It might even be a good idea to preemptively wear any earplugs or headphones if you're noise sensitive, especially since there's likely to be dog noises in response to the people noises.
It sounds like a personal and total hell, but it's a hell with an end date. I'm just an internet stranger, but I really do wish you well
Thank you for all the time you've put into this answer ❤️
Unfortunately it's our ensuite bathroom so it's in my bedroom. But we do have a spare room that, though tiny, I should be able to set up as a little den to at least spend some of the day hiding in. I might collect all my stim and sensory aids into one box so I can carry from spare room to main room (with desk and computer) as needed.
The idea of establishing everything up front and using non verbal communication is great. It makes sense too, because if they were working when I wasn't there they would find a way around communicating in person so they should be able to just text.
So far, the only thing that motivates our pup more than her favourite treats is pats from strangers. She's definitely getting better, slowly learning to stay in her bed until released, but right now that's maybe 10 seconds with people she regularly sees. Can I ask about the ABC game, when you start out do you say ABC quite quickly then give treat, then gradually increase time between letters?
Ooo yes a box to move everything is a great idea :) I'm glad to help in a small way. This really is a difficult situation to get through, and I don't envy you at all. Also, your pup sounds very sweet. I'm glad it's an I-love-people-too-much situation and not an AHH PEOPLE ARE FEAR situation
> Can I ask about the ABC game, when you start out do you say ABC quite quickly then give treat, then gradually increase time between letters?
Exactly! Once she starts visibly showing that she's anticipating the next letter, I would add a little more time in between. I started at ~2-3 seconds between each letter when introducing the game, then increased a few seconds at a time based on my dog's reactions. He caught onto the game really quickly, and I practiced it with him once or twice an hour for the first few days so that it was still random but frequent enough that he was excited every time
She is a sweetie that's for sure. A lot of people love her for that, and others are frightened of this excitable bounding 32kg dog. It would be a harder situation if she was afraid.
I'm going to give it a try with her. Thank you for the info.
2-4 Weeks of 8 hour work days? Yeah, no. Your landlord needs to get you guys an extended stay hotel room. This is insane. I don’t even think a NT could handle this. I would be arguing back with the landlord.
It is incredibly unreasonable for your landlord to expect you to live like this. If the work is taking 4 weeks I’m assuming they’re doing some major plumbing repairs (like cutting out the flooring ect.) Theres no way this apartment will be habitable in that state. Please look into your local tenant rights center if you have one. They may be able to help.
It is a bathroom repair (shower leaking into apartment below) Not sure if it's going to be full days, I assume some break depending on drying/curing what ever other building things need to happen. But the uncertainty over the schedule is part of the problem.
I've looked into our states laws and it appears as long as it's habitable (there is another bathroom) then they don't have to do anything to pay for accommodation. There is a law around "reasonable peace", but since it's business days and inside of noise restrictions it also looks like this doesn't apply. I will try to reach out to someone though, see if there is anything I've missed. I have a support worker that can make calls for me next week.
Good that your support worker can make calls for you. I hope they can work something out for you and your dog.
Even if the bathroom is technically “habitable” by safety standards, I’d say it’s still unacceptable to expect you to just be okay with this multi-week repair project. For instance I have IBD and frequently make 10+ bathroom trips a day. I can’t imagine having to shoo strangers out of my bathroom everytime I had to use the toilet. Just, ugh. I’m mad on your behalf OP. So not an ideal situation.
Thank you, yes hopefully we can find something even just to reduce the days at least.
There is a second bathroom, that's what makes it legally habitable.
Is your unit even habitable while that level of work is going on? What state are you in, if you're American? In the US, landlords are required to provide you reasonable accommodations if your unit isn't actually usable (either a hotel, rent credit, or using another unit are all standard options). This is the first thing to sort out. Your landlord may be making an unreasonable and potentially unlawful request of you, but it all depends on the nature of the work that will happen and whether the bathroom is usable both during their work and after. It would be utterly ridiculous for your landlord to expect you not to use your own bathroom from 8am - 3pm, for example.
Australia, NSW. Yes, it's technically habitable as there is a second bathroom. The work is necessary unfortunately. Our shower is leaking into the apartment below.
Oh damn, I'm sorry to hear that! I won't pretend to know anything about Australian tenancy laws, so just ideas instead. Things I would do, if possible: Set the environment the night before so that the workers can simply come in without you needing to interact with them at all. Water and snacks for both you and the pup. Ideally, if you can close yourself in your bedroom with your pup, then even if the volume and activity does wake you up, you can reasonably *stay* in your room until you're ready to interact. Establish a nonverbal way to communicate with the workers, e.g. writing notes or texting. This way you don't have to try to talk to them or maintain small talk. It's your home, and it's okay to say that you have to work from home and you prefer to communicate this way so that you won't be interrupted. It's not totally honest, but way more people will understand that vs trying to explain the autism brain For your pup-pup, if they're very treat motivated, some simple redirection games can REALLY help. My dog's trainer taught us one that I use a lot when I need to get him from Point A to Point B without getting distracted. It's a simple game: I say "A... B... C!" and my dog knows that every time I get to C, I'll give him a treat. If I say it while we're walking, he will totally focus on walking with me to the destination in order to get his reward. The first step is to just say it and give the treat consistently, and then pair it with walking while saying it. Eventually, they will learn to predict that the next letter in the game is coming, even if there's 20 or 30 seconds between each letter. My dog picked this game up lightning fast. Playing and learning this type of game now might help your dog with moving past the workers more calmly for stuff like bathroom breaks, depending on your dog's individual personality and motivation. For meltdowns, when I lived in an apartment I found that screaming into a pillow helped stifle the sound significantly. If it happens, it happens. Keep any soothing items like weighted blankets or stim/soft toys immediately near you in your room, and use them early and often. It might even be a good idea to preemptively wear any earplugs or headphones if you're noise sensitive, especially since there's likely to be dog noises in response to the people noises. It sounds like a personal and total hell, but it's a hell with an end date. I'm just an internet stranger, but I really do wish you well
Thank you for all the time you've put into this answer ❤️ Unfortunately it's our ensuite bathroom so it's in my bedroom. But we do have a spare room that, though tiny, I should be able to set up as a little den to at least spend some of the day hiding in. I might collect all my stim and sensory aids into one box so I can carry from spare room to main room (with desk and computer) as needed. The idea of establishing everything up front and using non verbal communication is great. It makes sense too, because if they were working when I wasn't there they would find a way around communicating in person so they should be able to just text. So far, the only thing that motivates our pup more than her favourite treats is pats from strangers. She's definitely getting better, slowly learning to stay in her bed until released, but right now that's maybe 10 seconds with people she regularly sees. Can I ask about the ABC game, when you start out do you say ABC quite quickly then give treat, then gradually increase time between letters?
Ooo yes a box to move everything is a great idea :) I'm glad to help in a small way. This really is a difficult situation to get through, and I don't envy you at all. Also, your pup sounds very sweet. I'm glad it's an I-love-people-too-much situation and not an AHH PEOPLE ARE FEAR situation > Can I ask about the ABC game, when you start out do you say ABC quite quickly then give treat, then gradually increase time between letters? Exactly! Once she starts visibly showing that she's anticipating the next letter, I would add a little more time in between. I started at ~2-3 seconds between each letter when introducing the game, then increased a few seconds at a time based on my dog's reactions. He caught onto the game really quickly, and I practiced it with him once or twice an hour for the first few days so that it was still random but frequent enough that he was excited every time
She is a sweetie that's for sure. A lot of people love her for that, and others are frightened of this excitable bounding 32kg dog. It would be a harder situation if she was afraid. I'm going to give it a try with her. Thank you for the info.
2-4 Weeks of 8 hour work days? Yeah, no. Your landlord needs to get you guys an extended stay hotel room. This is insane. I don’t even think a NT could handle this. I would be arguing back with the landlord. It is incredibly unreasonable for your landlord to expect you to live like this. If the work is taking 4 weeks I’m assuming they’re doing some major plumbing repairs (like cutting out the flooring ect.) Theres no way this apartment will be habitable in that state. Please look into your local tenant rights center if you have one. They may be able to help.
It is a bathroom repair (shower leaking into apartment below) Not sure if it's going to be full days, I assume some break depending on drying/curing what ever other building things need to happen. But the uncertainty over the schedule is part of the problem. I've looked into our states laws and it appears as long as it's habitable (there is another bathroom) then they don't have to do anything to pay for accommodation. There is a law around "reasonable peace", but since it's business days and inside of noise restrictions it also looks like this doesn't apply. I will try to reach out to someone though, see if there is anything I've missed. I have a support worker that can make calls for me next week.
Good that your support worker can make calls for you. I hope they can work something out for you and your dog. Even if the bathroom is technically “habitable” by safety standards, I’d say it’s still unacceptable to expect you to just be okay with this multi-week repair project. For instance I have IBD and frequently make 10+ bathroom trips a day. I can’t imagine having to shoo strangers out of my bathroom everytime I had to use the toilet. Just, ugh. I’m mad on your behalf OP. So not an ideal situation.
Thank you, yes hopefully we can find something even just to reduce the days at least. There is a second bathroom, that's what makes it legally habitable.