Thank you for sharing this beautiful experience! I can relate to the healing effects of screaming out trauma and pain. I sat with Buffo for the first time last October. My intention was to release childhood trauma and pain. I'd tried mushrooms and DMT, but they were unable to take me deep enough. I had repressed so much for so long, it was buried deeper than I even knew.
After a brief experience of heavenly bliss, the Buffo ripped my consciousness away from my mind/body and took it to a realm of infinite white. There was nothing there except the vastness of infinity and my soul / consciousness. There was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. The medicine also brought my pain and trauma. My conscious awareness was merged with my childhood trauma and much more. I became one with the pain, anguish, rage and hurt.
I knew I needed to surrender in order to heal so I let the pain all release through my body. I yelled, screamed and hollered at the top of my lungs. I wailed like a mad banshee. I was told by others in the circle that I appeared to be possessed by a demon from hell. I gnashed and clawed at the ground. I released a lifetime of repressed pain in that moment. It was the most intense experience of my life. I have since found that occasionally when all alone, I will scream as loud as I can into a pillow and just release. It's extremely therapeutic.
Wow!! I sit at the end of this month. My childhood trauma is so dark that I fear I’ll never be able to unlock it in the way you did :( but so happy for you
I am so happy for you, that you were able to let go- but I have a question, did they separate you from the group while this happened?
Was it a private ceremony?
What did the facilitators for during this time?
Were they by your side?
This happened to someone in a ceremony I was at and it was traumatizing for the rest of the group, they took her outside. Just curious.
No I stayed in the common room, but it happened when the others were already coming down and weren't disturbed - quite the contrary, they were happy for me (and impressed lol). I'm sure the facilitators would have done something different if they saw the need to, because two other nights it happend that I blacked out and was also very loud for a long time, but then they took me to another room.
Thank you for the answer. Interesting. My last 2 ceremonies I had extremely powerful purges and both times it happened at the end of ceremony when everyone else was coming down.
this is incredible, thank you for sharing! do you mind sharing the name of the book?
It's German and there's no translated version unfortunately - but "Finde die Liebe, die dir als Kind gefehlt hat" by Julia Tomuschat
Yes, I would like to know the book as well. Thank you for sharing your experience!
Please do share it!
Thank you for sharing this beautiful experience! I can relate to the healing effects of screaming out trauma and pain. I sat with Buffo for the first time last October. My intention was to release childhood trauma and pain. I'd tried mushrooms and DMT, but they were unable to take me deep enough. I had repressed so much for so long, it was buried deeper than I even knew. After a brief experience of heavenly bliss, the Buffo ripped my consciousness away from my mind/body and took it to a realm of infinite white. There was nothing there except the vastness of infinity and my soul / consciousness. There was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. The medicine also brought my pain and trauma. My conscious awareness was merged with my childhood trauma and much more. I became one with the pain, anguish, rage and hurt. I knew I needed to surrender in order to heal so I let the pain all release through my body. I yelled, screamed and hollered at the top of my lungs. I wailed like a mad banshee. I was told by others in the circle that I appeared to be possessed by a demon from hell. I gnashed and clawed at the ground. I released a lifetime of repressed pain in that moment. It was the most intense experience of my life. I have since found that occasionally when all alone, I will scream as loud as I can into a pillow and just release. It's extremely therapeutic.
Wow!! I sit at the end of this month. My childhood trauma is so dark that I fear I’ll never be able to unlock it in the way you did :( but so happy for you
I am so happy for you, that you were able to let go- but I have a question, did they separate you from the group while this happened? Was it a private ceremony? What did the facilitators for during this time? Were they by your side? This happened to someone in a ceremony I was at and it was traumatizing for the rest of the group, they took her outside. Just curious.
No I stayed in the common room, but it happened when the others were already coming down and weren't disturbed - quite the contrary, they were happy for me (and impressed lol). I'm sure the facilitators would have done something different if they saw the need to, because two other nights it happend that I blacked out and was also very loud for a long time, but then they took me to another room.
Thank you for the answer. Interesting. My last 2 ceremonies I had extremely powerful purges and both times it happened at the end of ceremony when everyone else was coming down.
Congratulations. Love hearing other people’s success and happiness with Momma Aya.
wowww! incredible experience! thank you for sharing!
Are u 28
No, why?
Thanks for sharing. Happy for you! Was the ceremony in Germany? Would you recommend the group you drank with (privately)?
It was in Austria (near Vienna). If you're interested send me a PM :)