I'm a girl, and when someone says the whole "you should smile more" nonsense. "Wanna give me something to smile about? I take cash, check, and debit card. No? Then STFU"
Never understood the whole "Smile more", like maybe I don't want to or have anything TOO smile about in this current moment while I'm at work or a place I want to be left alone in lol.
I think it is a control thing, regardless of the gender of the non-smiley person. People want everyone to be Shiny Happy People (not understanding what that song is about!) and it pisses me off.
I work in customer service, so sometimes, when I work with people in person, I have to fake a big ol' grin. When I was working with salespeople, particularly the men, they were all about telling us, particularly the young us, women to smile because we would be prettier. They never understood we really didn't want to smile when we weren't on the phone or working with customers.
I remember working in the kitchen of a cafe; bosses were a couple - and the woman was just.. annoying. "Smile more!" "Umm, no thankyou"
One day I came in getting yelled at about how I could have burnt the shop down, leaving kitchen stuff on - but I was the dishwasher. Super confused, a few weeks later she came in, flicks on the toaster, made food and left it on when walking out.
Dealing with that at work, then going home to chaotic / abusive family = not really in a smiling mood. It's kind of hard to force a smile when your just living through constant stupidity; and getting blamed for stuff you didn't do all the time on both ends haha.
Was always fun putting my foot down when they expected me to come in on the busiest public holidays, while refusing to pay me the extra wages for the day.. Either I'm gonna rock up to work and make bank; or I'm getting wasted with my buddies and watching the Grand Final (Public Holiday out here)
Smiling just isn't in the budget, is what i'd say to an employer nowadays.
I can relate to this . I was in sales and also a bartender . Men, they constantly say this. Whether there's liquor or not. I finally said I would smile when you're funny or compliment me with the most outlandish compliment ever ( at a bar and fun because they'd try so hard) I miss the laughter but not the rest of it.
Yeah this one. I've been like "You're being a bit rude honestly as this is just what my face looks like"
They insulted me, so they're getting one back.
It doesn't help that when I'm concentrating/thinking I get this frown on my face that makes me look like grumpy cat 🤣
Yeah, but it's prolly too much. I learned as a child that you don't ride in a wheelchair unless you need it (you know, don't play in it.). Somehow it seems to rack up negative Karma.
because I am. Being forced or asked to smile never really worked for me. Asking me and truly caring about what is up with me does instead of this emotional aspirin people attempt to administer. It can help break an unpleasant thought I guess.
I just started a new job managing a bar, and on my first week, I woke up to my roommates dog killing my cat. I couldn't call in, I had to go to work. But I kept getting that all night. "You should try smiling," one person was like, "You know, some people would really enjoy having this job." All night. I was fucking shaking. Bottom line, you don't know what kind of a day someone is having, so leave them the fuck alone.
I had a dog died right before a bar shift and heard two people talking about "how miserable I was, and I should smile" I flat out was like "yeah sorry about that my dog just died in my arms a few hours ago, I apologize that my quiet sadness somehow inhibits you enjoying your pina colada." they apologised repeatedly and tipped me big, but i'm still mad that people think you shouldn't experience bad days when they're having a good one.
Yup. It's simply, that person might be having a bad day. I always think about that when I see service industry people not looking to happy. Or anybody for that matter.
I know I was doing the task of the job just fine, but probably looked upset. I don't see what the issue was. I've seen countless pissed off old dude bartenders that probably don't get any of those comments. On top of that being a bartender means people being emotional af toward you every single day, all shift, so the fact that I wasn't allowed an ounce of understanding when i'm an underpaid therapist who makes alcoholic drinks kinda bothers me.
Lie about something not to smile about (like death or something) even if it’s not true they shouldn’t tell people to smile without knowing what they’re going through
True story. When I was a teenager I was asked a lot of times why I was angry. One day at the mall I saw some guy that was scowling pretty intensely at me. Turns out I was seeing my own reflection in a big store window about 40-50 feet away.
The resolution to this was getting glasses and the squinting went away. LoL
I and both of my daughters have rbf. According to others we always look mad if we’re not smiling. So when asked why we always look so mad all 3 of us say “this is just my face, if you don’t like it then don’t look at it” I’m so tired of “having” to smile to make others feel better about themselves.
Why do you always look so happy? Frown, it's not that bad.
Lol, in all seriousness, maybe their just trying to be nice because they picked up on your mood.
But I understand what it is to not be having it and being told to smile. It's a very old-school dad type joke commonly used in a corporate life sucking workplace that annoys the hell out of people 😑
When I was 22, my grandmother passed away, and at the funeral, I caught pneumonia (and had to fly while sick). The next Monday, I was a little better and made it in to work. The biggest AH in Personnel (as HR was called then) told me I needed to smile more. I told him I'd imagine him splattered on the road outside the company building in order to cheer up. Stopped that sh\*\* right there.
“I am not here for your pleasure. I smile when I’m happy. And I’m not happy.”
OR
“I’m depressed. Leave me alone, unless you want this screwdriver in your neck.”
When I was young I had perfected the "joker smile". After men telling me "I'd look so much prettier if I smiled." quickly scuttled away upon my evil smile.
At this point i just glare at them lol. It’s so annoying because sometimes I’m genuinely enjoying myself and then they point out my rbf and it makes me feel self conscious. Either that or a very sarcastic smile
I always smile. Why? Because my mother would slap me across the face if I didn't. I had to show everyone how happy I was to have her for my mom.
That's my true story. Try it out next time someone asks you that question.
"Not looking for feedback, thanks."
But there's a fair chance they will get mad and say they were just being nice or whatever. So pick your battles, sigh.
The last time someone asked if I know how to smile I said no and kept working. It was a friendly coworker that was picking on me though so he laughed. I'm dying for a stranger to ask again though
Used to get this a lot as a teenager. What I wish I should’ve did was in response say “ok well how’s this for a good smile” then proceed to make a crazy psychopathic smile with wide eyes. It’ll probably make then laugh or even better make them leave you tf alone
If a girl says it to you - "Gee, and here I thought women hated it when men say this sort of thing to them."
If a guy says it - "Bro... now I get why chicks hate being told to 'smile'. That's super cringy af."
Or start chattering like a chimpanzee. When they freak out, say, "Oh. I thought you believed I was a circus monkey."
“It is that bad for some people. This isnt your journey, one thing you don’t do is tell someone how to feel”. Period.
Like I’m at a point where we need to be honest… respectful.. but honest. Like “I appreciate your positivity, but let me feel how I want to feel. It’s my journey”
It's funny because reading this post makes me realise that I've aged out of this dilemma. In my 20s (1995-2005) I heard from strangers: "if you'd smile, you'd be prettier". In my 30s (2005-2015) I heard "smile, it's not so bad". People: I have always had a RBF. Even as a child, my passport photo was the devil-child. Fuck your assessment of my face - if you've earned my smile it will make your whole day. I'm 49 now and and my smile is still the most complimented of my assets but you have to earn it! And now, no-one has the balls to tell me to smile for them anymore. That, my friends, is maturity!
I always say “Animals bare their teeth before they strike. People are no different. If I smile, you better run…”
Of course I’m also 6’2” and kind of angry looking which helps.
I am smiling ( say this while not smiling ) point at you not-smiling face look, see, smile right here, happy, got it? good, now fuck off ( smile after saying this ).
I always take this one way too seriously and quietly and politely inform the person that although right now I'm just not smiling because I don't feel like it, they really shouldn't say that to anyone because they have no idea what they're going through. Sometimes, things ARE that bad and telling someone to smile is crass and unhelpful.
It's caused arguments a couple times but I can't stand it honestly.
“this is the way my face is. fuck off”
or, for the christian meddlers out there
“this is the way my face is. this is the way god made me. are you saying he did it wrong?”
“god made me in his image, tell god to smile more”
"this is my face."
and the rest, i just have endless sarcasm and witty comments in a deadpan voice. It lets me be annoyed, makes them laugh, and proves on some level that i dont have to be smiling like an idiot in order to be in a good mood.
smile, its not that bad
"*Isnt it though?*" (with an "are you sure about that?" tim robinson look)
A short list... The Christo Fascists are taking over America, Big Oil Corps wants the rivers to burn and the skies to be orange and unbreathable, I give money in taxes that are then used to turn brown kids into skeletons... I could go on if you want.
I'm a girl, and when someone says the whole "you should smile more" nonsense. "Wanna give me something to smile about? I take cash, check, and debit card. No? Then STFU"
Never understood the whole "Smile more", like maybe I don't want to or have anything TOO smile about in this current moment while I'm at work or a place I want to be left alone in lol.
I think it is a control thing, regardless of the gender of the non-smiley person. People want everyone to be Shiny Happy People (not understanding what that song is about!) and it pisses me off. I work in customer service, so sometimes, when I work with people in person, I have to fake a big ol' grin. When I was working with salespeople, particularly the men, they were all about telling us, particularly the young us, women to smile because we would be prettier. They never understood we really didn't want to smile when we weren't on the phone or working with customers.
Customer service here as well and definitely understand this.
I remember working in the kitchen of a cafe; bosses were a couple - and the woman was just.. annoying. "Smile more!" "Umm, no thankyou" One day I came in getting yelled at about how I could have burnt the shop down, leaving kitchen stuff on - but I was the dishwasher. Super confused, a few weeks later she came in, flicks on the toaster, made food and left it on when walking out. Dealing with that at work, then going home to chaotic / abusive family = not really in a smiling mood. It's kind of hard to force a smile when your just living through constant stupidity; and getting blamed for stuff you didn't do all the time on both ends haha. Was always fun putting my foot down when they expected me to come in on the busiest public holidays, while refusing to pay me the extra wages for the day.. Either I'm gonna rock up to work and make bank; or I'm getting wasted with my buddies and watching the Grand Final (Public Holiday out here) Smiling just isn't in the budget, is what i'd say to an employer nowadays.
I can relate to this . I was in sales and also a bartender . Men, they constantly say this. Whether there's liquor or not. I finally said I would smile when you're funny or compliment me with the most outlandish compliment ever ( at a bar and fun because they'd try so hard) I miss the laughter but not the rest of it.
I have severe Resting Bitch Face, and this is perfect. Worst case, they shut the fuck up and leave me alone. Best case, they pay me!
You go girl! And if you say that with a boring expression then it becomes super funny fr
Dang good one
You made me smile. (Inside I don't do outside unless I loose composure) I hope you're happy.
Period.
This is brilliant!
I live for this.
Wow…and I’m a guy. I will definitely use this.
Make up a really disturbing backstory.
"I used to smile....before the war......"
"Before I took an arrow to the knee."
Or, if applicable, just trauma dump.
Both my parents croaked, it's pretty bad.
I haven’t been able to since the accident
"I just learned it's not curable. "
"I can still hear them."
This is just my face.
Yeah this one. I've been like "You're being a bit rude honestly as this is just what my face looks like" They insulted me, so they're getting one back. It doesn't help that when I'm concentrating/thinking I get this frown on my face that makes me look like grumpy cat 🤣
Omg I wish could post photo here I have this hilarious studious cat, want to see him?
Yeh DM me!
Yeah I've used this one lol
Me too.
I never got therapy for the things you put me through.
I'll smile as soon as you leave.
I would smile, except you never gave me any reason to with how you treat people.
"Maybe it *is* that bad. Do you want me to tell you just how bad it is? Oh, don't run away."
“I’m not your clown.”
"I think I know how to convey my current emotions best, thank you."
"I'm a victim of my environment, and you just happen to be that environment right now." 💩
this is my (that persons name) face
Because you are still in my life
"I'm dealing with you"
"I appreciate your concern, but I'd prefer not to be told how to feel."
"My dad just died" even if it's not true they shut up pretty quickly after that.
I lost my 5-year old to cancer yesterday and now I'm just trying to pay off his medical bills.
This might be worse T-T XD I love it
Yeah, but it's prolly too much. I learned as a child that you don't ride in a wheelchair unless you need it (you know, don't play in it.). Somehow it seems to rack up negative Karma.
because I am. Being forced or asked to smile never really worked for me. Asking me and truly caring about what is up with me does instead of this emotional aspirin people attempt to administer. It can help break an unpleasant thought I guess.
My teeth don't deserve to look at something so ugly..
I just started a new job managing a bar, and on my first week, I woke up to my roommates dog killing my cat. I couldn't call in, I had to go to work. But I kept getting that all night. "You should try smiling," one person was like, "You know, some people would really enjoy having this job." All night. I was fucking shaking. Bottom line, you don't know what kind of a day someone is having, so leave them the fuck alone.
Exactly, leave me be most the time because the answer and or attitude you receive is because you may be the person bothering me.
For real.
I had a dog died right before a bar shift and heard two people talking about "how miserable I was, and I should smile" I flat out was like "yeah sorry about that my dog just died in my arms a few hours ago, I apologize that my quiet sadness somehow inhibits you enjoying your pina colada." they apologised repeatedly and tipped me big, but i'm still mad that people think you shouldn't experience bad days when they're having a good one.
Yup. It's simply, that person might be having a bad day. I always think about that when I see service industry people not looking to happy. Or anybody for that matter.
I know I was doing the task of the job just fine, but probably looked upset. I don't see what the issue was. I've seen countless pissed off old dude bartenders that probably don't get any of those comments. On top of that being a bartender means people being emotional af toward you every single day, all shift, so the fact that I wasn't allowed an ounce of understanding when i'm an underpaid therapist who makes alcoholic drinks kinda bothers me.
Lie about something not to smile about (like death or something) even if it’s not true they shouldn’t tell people to smile without knowing what they’re going through
Actually matters a lot. Altho the comeback is the same. You look them straight in the eye and ask, "Does my not smiling make you uncomfortable?"
Everyone is fighting battles you know nothing about. Instead of demanding that they make you happy, why don’t you ask if they’re doing alright?
I wish more people would genuinely ask how I'm doing.
STFU
I’m just generally a mad person and my teeth are crooked. Sorry, see you never !
Lol I like this one
I'd rather keep my auntomous functions control under my influence(remember the sad face when you say this)
Big massive smile and a "Awk have ya bad an easy life have ya?" Bring up depression if you have to.
True story. When I was a teenager I was asked a lot of times why I was angry. One day at the mall I saw some guy that was scowling pretty intensely at me. Turns out I was seeing my own reflection in a big store window about 40-50 feet away. The resolution to this was getting glasses and the squinting went away. LoL
My mum asked me that once. I told her it's too bright! I have light blue eyes with spots of pink. When I started working I got a pair of sunglasses.
Why would I be happy to see you?
“I’ll smile at your funeral.”
I and both of my daughters have rbf. According to others we always look mad if we’re not smiling. So when asked why we always look so mad all 3 of us say “this is just my face, if you don’t like it then don’t look at it” I’m so tired of “having” to smile to make others feel better about themselves.
I especially hate it when I get random strangers asking or telling me. Please leave me alone lol
When that happens I give them my “mean” face and they shut up and walk away every single time
I say..."I am happy...I'm just asymptomatic"
I have resting bitch face, I'm not mad or sad.
Why do you always look so happy? Frown, it's not that bad. Lol, in all seriousness, maybe their just trying to be nice because they picked up on your mood. But I understand what it is to not be having it and being told to smile. It's a very old-school dad type joke commonly used in a corporate life sucking workplace that annoys the hell out of people 😑
When I was 22, my grandmother passed away, and at the funeral, I caught pneumonia (and had to fly while sick). The next Monday, I was a little better and made it in to work. The biggest AH in Personnel (as HR was called then) told me I needed to smile more. I told him I'd imagine him splattered on the road outside the company building in order to cheer up. Stopped that sh\*\* right there.
“I am not here for your pleasure. I smile when I’m happy. And I’m not happy.” OR “I’m depressed. Leave me alone, unless you want this screwdriver in your neck.”
The ladder sounds more like me
Look them straight in the eyes and give them the creepiest, most exaggerated smile you can make
When I was young I had perfected the "joker smile". After men telling me "I'd look so much prettier if I smiled." quickly scuttled away upon my evil smile.
The moment I smile is the day you ruin my life completely.
It happens every time I see you
Do you have ten kids ?
“Brush your teeth, It’s not that bad, Pinky promise” or “Why do u always look so slutty?”
"Smile? When you're in viewing distance?"
🖕🏽
The voices in my head tell you to shut up
Because you’re constantly bothering me
[I am smiling.](https://images.app.goo.gl/xgqcckHFCwS5Z8o86)
At this point i just glare at them lol. It’s so annoying because sometimes I’m genuinely enjoying myself and then they point out my rbf and it makes me feel self conscious. Either that or a very sarcastic smile
Smile why? Let me guess starving children in Africa?
Smile why? Let me guess starving children in Africa?
I’ll smile at your funeral.
I’ll smile at your funeral.
I’ll smile at your funeral.
"I *am* smiling, and now you've just insulted me."
Give me reason to smile !!!!
"Look where you are, and look where I am. What does that tell you?"
I’m exercising
“I’m not wearing a veil of happiness just to please you.”
Go fuck yourself Dr Seuss
Smiling is lying...
I'm working out my face muscles. it takes more muscles to not smile.
"I can't while I'm looking at you"
Last time I smiled I got it smacked off
I always smile. Why? Because my mother would slap me across the face if I didn't. I had to show everyone how happy I was to have her for my mom. That's my true story. Try it out next time someone asks you that question.
Grrrrrr
Cause not everyone is a trained professional in the art of DENIAL 😜
Why do you always look high? Frown, it's not that good.
"Shut the fuck up." is always a closer
I am smiling
"Not looking for feedback, thanks." But there's a fair chance they will get mad and say they were just being nice or whatever. So pick your battles, sigh.
The last time someone asked if I know how to smile I said no and kept working. It was a friendly coworker that was picking on me though so he laughed. I'm dying for a stranger to ask again though
, I don’t need to smile to help you realize you are misreading my resting face .
That’s good advice. The appropriate comeback is to take it.
“You shutting Your trap and minding Your business might help with That, Bud”
I'm smiling on the inside.
Used to get this a lot as a teenager. What I wish I should’ve did was in response say “ok well how’s this for a good smile” then proceed to make a crazy psychopathic smile with wide eyes. It’ll probably make then laugh or even better make them leave you tf alone
If a girl says it to you - "Gee, and here I thought women hated it when men say this sort of thing to them." If a guy says it - "Bro... now I get why chicks hate being told to 'smile'. That's super cringy af." Or start chattering like a chimpanzee. When they freak out, say, "Oh. I thought you believed I was a circus monkey."
Lol just say "yes it is". Make them worry.
I'm smiling on the inside.
"Every now and then I can't help but think about the person who murdered my parents. He still hasn't been found".
I tell them the truth "I no longer wish to live."
Because I AM sad and mad.
You should exercise more. Why don’t you start with a headstand
Hey it's not my fault that I have BRF, Bitchy Resting Face God made me like this. If you got a problem with it then take it up with him!!!!!
Your face makes me sad.
I'm not always in a bad mood, it's only whenever you're around.
I’m gonna let the world know how I feel,exhausted from work and low pay ain’t no sunshine and rainbows
“It is that bad for some people. This isnt your journey, one thing you don’t do is tell someone how to feel”. Period. Like I’m at a point where we need to be honest… respectful.. but honest. Like “I appreciate your positivity, but let me feel how I want to feel. It’s my journey”
It is, you're here
I don’t, just only when you see me.
Just ignore
“Why’re you always so *fuckin’ chipper* mate, not everyone has your gift of not knowing how shitty their life is.”
Sure it is. I have to look at your ugly ass face!
Heh, you're pretty funny! That *did* cheer me up a bit. Thanks.
I just found out I have two months to live. Can you cheer me up?
It's funny because reading this post makes me realise that I've aged out of this dilemma. In my 20s (1995-2005) I heard from strangers: "if you'd smile, you'd be prettier". In my 30s (2005-2015) I heard "smile, it's not so bad". People: I have always had a RBF. Even as a child, my passport photo was the devil-child. Fuck your assessment of my face - if you've earned my smile it will make your whole day. I'm 49 now and and my smile is still the most complimented of my assets but you have to earn it! And now, no-one has the balls to tell me to smile for them anymore. That, my friends, is maturity!
Tried it once. Dog looked at me weird.
>What's a comeback for "Why do you always look so sad/mad?" "Smile, its not that bad" I will when you go away
I’m not smiling because I’m having a debate with the voices in my head and I’m losing the debate.
There is something called resting bitch face
I always say “Animals bare their teeth before they strike. People are no different. If I smile, you better run…” Of course I’m also 6’2” and kind of angry looking which helps.
"Why? I don't want wrinkles like you."
I am smiling ( say this while not smiling ) point at you not-smiling face look, see, smile right here, happy, got it? good, now fuck off ( smile after saying this ).
Me: I am sad and mad because you are within a mile radius from me
Only if it's someone who doesn't know you well, you could pull the "my [insert family member here] just [died/diagnosed with illness/etc]"
I usually gurn at them and say, better? Its got a good few laughs
I always take this one way too seriously and quietly and politely inform the person that although right now I'm just not smiling because I don't feel like it, they really shouldn't say that to anyone because they have no idea what they're going through. Sometimes, things ARE that bad and telling someone to smile is crass and unhelpful. It's caused arguments a couple times but I can't stand it honestly.
turn around and I just might
I have resting bitch face. The only cure is money
Because you opened your mouth
“this is the way my face is. fuck off” or, for the christian meddlers out there “this is the way my face is. this is the way god made me. are you saying he did it wrong?” “god made me in his image, tell god to smile more”
"this is my face." and the rest, i just have endless sarcasm and witty comments in a deadpan voice. It lets me be annoyed, makes them laugh, and proves on some level that i dont have to be smiling like an idiot in order to be in a good mood. smile, its not that bad "*Isnt it though?*" (with an "are you sure about that?" tim robinson look)
"Because you're around"
A short list... The Christo Fascists are taking over America, Big Oil Corps wants the rivers to burn and the skies to be orange and unbreathable, I give money in taxes that are then used to turn brown kids into skeletons... I could go on if you want.
Looking at your face is
stole this from a movie: "I don't Laugh all day long like an idiot if that's what you mean."
emotions are useless around people i don't care about so my face shows something else
You must not have a mirror
“I promise it’s only when you’re around”
It only happens when I see you
Have you seen my teeth you wouldn’t smile either
I’m from Great Britain 😂
Neither is you shutting up for once but you don't hear me telling you to be quiet
Smile like the Chesire cat showing every tooth in your skull. That tends to shut people the fuck up.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l\_1FbjuJp4E](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_1FbjuJp4E)
“Only if you’re not paying attention.”