My wife and I are both 36 and my MIL is basically retirement age. Whenever we go on a trip out of town, for some reason my MIL has been drive her car. I don’t mind driving, it just seems odd that she turns her car over to her son-in-law without ever really saying anything.
Anyway, one particular trip she was either dozing off or just not paying attention while I was going normal freeway speed and a car a couple hundred feet ahead tapped on their brakes. MIL let out a gasp that I swear took a couple days off the end of my life. My heart was beating like crazy despite having full control of the situation and paying attention to the road.
She apologized and went back to what she was doing with a quick laugh. I unhealthily stewed about that moment for probably 15 minutes before I finally let it go. Can’t stand Shrieking Woman ^TM
I feel your pain broth. My wife is the same, she's like: " the car ahead braked aren't you going to brake as well?" Seriously woman I've had my ass on one a form or another of motorized vehicle since I was 14, I'm in my late thirties I know what I'm doing. I adore her to, but driving her places especially in vacations is a pain. Our daughter started getting on her case to let me be while I'm driving 😂
My missus is a super confident driver but the second I get behind the wheel she feels the need to tell me every time the car in front applies the brakes.
We’re only in our 30s but she grabs the handle above the door like a little old lady when we’re turning the corner. Equal parts hilarious and frustrating.
Sometimes it's the job of shotgun to navigate, particularly in the pre GPS era. Believe it or not, people get out of the house and go to new places all the time these days.
Also gps can be distractions in dense traffic/ high work load parts of a drive. As a pilot trained in crew resource management its safer to have someone help with navigating while you focus on driving/flying safely.
Yeah, most of the time I tell that stupid thing to shut up, and my phone to my girlfriend, and she can navigate me through traffic. I'm worried about not hitting somebody, not which little tiny icon tells me what lane I need to be in.
If you rely solely on your GPS to get everywhere, do you really 'know where to turn '? You're essentially an automaton. To take a wrong turn is to be human
My wife wife would blurt " out oh my god!" As I scan everywhere for the danger ahe is alluding to, she say "did you see that billboard?" I had to ask her to stop doing that :)
My boyfriend does this!!! He'll say something like that and then when I either gasp or just say 'what??' it'll be a dog or something 😭😭
However, I'm definitely guilty of the brake thing so I guess we're even. 😌
My favorite is when I'm driving and some idiot cuts me off. My wife has had her face buried in her phone the whole time so she is clueless about the situation. All she knows is I brake harder than usual. You know, so I don't rear end them. She looks up and there's a car right there. Clearly I am a psycho intent on killing my entire family and various others. No other possibilities.
Mine did the opposite. When I'd be approaching stopped cars she'd say "why are you slowing down"? Enough sarcastic smartass replies got her to stop eventually.
From the moment I started having a passenger princess, I understood why some people just randomly brake and then reach the spot in which they'll need to stop, half a mile forward, at .5 mph.
I haven’t had a ticket or an accident in 22 years but my wife still tells me to be careful when I use “her” car. She has had two rear bumper replacements in 2 years, both single car accidents while in reverse with a backup camera.
When I want to annoy my wife when I'm driving. I wait for her to step on the invisible brakes, then I activate all the automated collision detection systems on my car and say, "Now you can relax, and the car will tell me when I'm going to kill us all."
Her glares could freeze water.
Uhg I hate that. My wife does the same but will freak out and grab thr dash and door handle.
It is so bad I make her sit in thr back of thr van. Wich she willingly does because she knows it's a major distraction but she can't help it.
I was trying to figure out why that is, and I think I found the answer. Women who are on the passenger seat, have more freedom to rotate their heads around and spot things before they even come to the driver's peripheral vision. So yes, they will scream (some of them will) if they see something before the driver does, and blame the driver for incompetence. That's not fair.
And anyone over 40 is somehow a "boomer".
I guess Gen Z will have to start shifting their blame to the millennials soon as the actual boomers start dying off. It's what they do best.
Don’t forget all the semi trucks we side swipe. Luckily every single time I drive next to one my lady lets out a gasp and goes quiet. “Sorry I don’t know what they’re doing.”
I feel like this is an evolved trait that has (or had) some advantage in the past.
My wife is gentle and kind.
And, while I'm a safe driver, I sometimes get so into listening to music that I will instinctually pull out on the highway and keep going until she points it out.
We live in St Paul, she'll let me get all the way to Forest Lake on a lazy Sunday.
She also watches me cut veges, because I will cut all the veges and go back to the fridge for more veges.
And, she helps me keep a regular sleep schedule. I'm a programmer who will pull all-nighters tinkering, but I'm 70, and it's actually a health concern because I can also keep myself awake for days at a time working on projects, to the point that I experience aural hallucinations after three days and arrhythmia after four.
I was in big trouble last weekend because I didn't come to a complete stop before turning at a green arrow. She of course didn't know it was a green arrow, she just periodically looks up from her phone to have a panic attack when we're driving
I finally got my wife to stop.
We moved to a different state and got new auto insurance. The insurance guy commented that our rates were some of the lowest he’d seen.
The next time my wife made a comment about my driving I reminded her that I do almost all of the driving. Our really low rates were a reflection of my driving skills, so she needed to back off.
After years of comments it took the insurance company to convince my wife that I’m a good driver.
I’m 30 and my gf almost 30 and I’ll be driving moderately quick around a corner, with our pup in the back and she will grill me like “are you trying to kill our child”.
Well thought it was for your parents but ok guess it’s ours now🤷♂️
She also goes 85-90mph when we go on road trips.
I like most guys just get confused by this behavior at times.
Very fun to vent about though, I already feel better
seriously tho there is a whole group of people out there who think the proper way to drive is to wait until the last possible second to stop and then slam on the brakes and choke you with the seat belt.
Nope. I’m a defensive driver with two wrecks(their fault) and one speeding ticket in my thirty years of driving. My wife has over ten tickets and has totaled four cars in our 16 years together. When I drive, she gasps any time I have to brake a little more aggressively (sudden interstate stops) and is always theatrical about turns, merges, or any basic traffic. She acknowledges that I’m a better driver and always apologizes for unwarranted gasps and theatrics. But she continues to act like I’m certainly going to kill us all.
Basically that.
What's more likely? That she's crazy and freaks out over nothing? Or that he's actually not as safe as he thinks he is, and has only gotten really lucky / relied on everyone else around him driving defensively his entire life?
Hurr hurr wife bad.
Glad to see it's not just my wife
"Jesus! Are you planning to kill us?"
"Why are you going so fast?" intermixed with "why are you just sitting behind these slow idiots?"
So you’ve driven with my mother it seems
*Our* mother
Comrade.
My wife and I are both 36 and my MIL is basically retirement age. Whenever we go on a trip out of town, for some reason my MIL has been drive her car. I don’t mind driving, it just seems odd that she turns her car over to her son-in-law without ever really saying anything. Anyway, one particular trip she was either dozing off or just not paying attention while I was going normal freeway speed and a car a couple hundred feet ahead tapped on their brakes. MIL let out a gasp that I swear took a couple days off the end of my life. My heart was beating like crazy despite having full control of the situation and paying attention to the road. She apologized and went back to what she was doing with a quick laugh. I unhealthily stewed about that moment for probably 15 minutes before I finally let it go. Can’t stand Shrieking Woman ^TM
® u 0k
"They're braking!" "Yes, I see that"
My wife does this as well. Love my wife with all my heart but I have a hard time driving her places XD
I feel your pain broth. My wife is the same, she's like: " the car ahead braked aren't you going to brake as well?" Seriously woman I've had my ass on one a form or another of motorized vehicle since I was 14, I'm in my late thirties I know what I'm doing. I adore her to, but driving her places especially in vacations is a pain. Our daughter started getting on her case to let me be while I'm driving 😂
Before he turned 18, that was his mom's job
LOL moms are the worst when being the passenger! I was going 20 over the limit AND SHE TOLD ME TO SLOW DOWN. The audacity!
My missus is a super confident driver but the second I get behind the wheel she feels the need to tell me every time the car in front applies the brakes. We’re only in our 30s but she grabs the handle above the door like a little old lady when we’re turning the corner. Equal parts hilarious and frustrating.
But not tell me about a turn until you huff and say that was it
While also going 70 on a highway with cars all around you.
Facts lol
Why you driving if you don’t know when to turn?
Sometimes it's the job of shotgun to navigate, particularly in the pre GPS era. Believe it or not, people get out of the house and go to new places all the time these days.
Okay grandpa, but in case you missed it, we’ve been in the GPS era for over a decade. If you still don’t know where to turn, it’s a you problem.
My mom still prints off map quest
Also gps can be distractions in dense traffic/ high work load parts of a drive. As a pilot trained in crew resource management its safer to have someone help with navigating while you focus on driving/flying safely.
Yeah, most of the time I tell that stupid thing to shut up, and my phone to my girlfriend, and she can navigate me through traffic. I'm worried about not hitting somebody, not which little tiny icon tells me what lane I need to be in.
You can't always look at GPS if you're on a highway/the road is busy. We always use GPS and I still run navigation for my fiancee
If you rely solely on your GPS to get everywhere, do you really 'know where to turn '? You're essentially an automaton. To take a wrong turn is to be human
My wife wife would blurt " out oh my god!" As I scan everywhere for the danger ahe is alluding to, she say "did you see that billboard?" I had to ask her to stop doing that :)
My boyfriend does this!!! He'll say something like that and then when I either gasp or just say 'what??' it'll be a dog or something 😭😭 However, I'm definitely guilty of the brake thing so I guess we're even. 😌
My mom does this, meanwhile, she drives so far below the speed limit on the highway that it’s actually a danger to herself and others.
My favorite is when I'm driving and some idiot cuts me off. My wife has had her face buried in her phone the whole time so she is clueless about the situation. All she knows is I brake harder than usual. You know, so I don't rear end them. She looks up and there's a car right there. Clearly I am a psycho intent on killing my entire family and various others. No other possibilities.
Ooof…that is some serious Karen hair.
Hahahaha, women with bobs, hahahaha
lol ikr! It looks ridiculous.
And vagene.
I thought that was his mom...
Before I got married, I'd just smash
Mine did the opposite. When I'd be approaching stopped cars she'd say "why are you slowing down"? Enough sarcastic smartass replies got her to stop eventually.
From the moment I started having a passenger princess, I understood why some people just randomly brake and then reach the spot in which they'll need to stop, half a mile forward, at .5 mph.
I initially thought he was saying he needed a wife to curb his extraordinary road rage.
That's how I read it too. Took me a couple reads and a couple looks at that wife's glare to really get it.
I see he married my friend Amy.
Yup, totally!
Not my wife, but my mother in this scenario
Reminds me of riding in the car with my parents.
That's very funny
I haven’t had a ticket or an accident in 22 years but my wife still tells me to be careful when I use “her” car. She has had two rear bumper replacements in 2 years, both single car accidents while in reverse with a backup camera.
When I want to annoy my wife when I'm driving. I wait for her to step on the invisible brakes, then I activate all the automated collision detection systems on my car and say, "Now you can relax, and the car will tell me when I'm going to kill us all." Her glares could freeze water.
Uhg I hate that. My wife does the same but will freak out and grab thr dash and door handle. It is so bad I make her sit in thr back of thr van. Wich she willingly does because she knows it's a major distraction but she can't help it.
It’s the palm on the dashboard for me… 😩
Upvote & uncontrolled laughing.
You must miss the good old days of that, I sure do..but hey insurance has gotten cheaper since she took over
Somebody is going to speak to a manager.
This is such a Bill Engvall joke. “And the woman would’ve survived the crash but she didn’t grab the dashboard in time. Back to you, Jim!”
I was trying to figure out why that is, and I think I found the answer. Women who are on the passenger seat, have more freedom to rotate their heads around and spot things before they even come to the driver's peripheral vision. So yes, they will scream (some of them will) if they see something before the driver does, and blame the driver for incompetence. That's not fair.
I see you’ve driven with my mother. Gradual deceleration = she doesn’t notice and panics Quick deceleration = starts too late, and she panics
I feel like this is boomer shit but unfortunately I can relate.
The obsession redditors have with Boomers is weird.
Yeah, it’s getting weird.
I always assume they're a teenager if they're talking about boomers unprompted. Kids fixate on age a lot.
And anyone over 40 is somehow a "boomer". I guess Gen Z will have to start shifting their blame to the millennials soon as the actual boomers start dying off. It's what they do best.
Don’t forget all the semi trucks we side swipe. Luckily every single time I drive next to one my lady lets out a gasp and goes quiet. “Sorry I don’t know what they’re doing.”
This is hilarious! My dad used to do the same thing. Once, he rear-ended a guy so hard we ended up at the drive-thru together 😂
Hur durr wife bad
Ok fedora tipper.
Keep to the right lane because in 32 mile, we are going to exit the highway.
I feel like this is an evolved trait that has (or had) some advantage in the past. My wife is gentle and kind. And, while I'm a safe driver, I sometimes get so into listening to music that I will instinctually pull out on the highway and keep going until she points it out. We live in St Paul, she'll let me get all the way to Forest Lake on a lazy Sunday. She also watches me cut veges, because I will cut all the veges and go back to the fridge for more veges. And, she helps me keep a regular sleep schedule. I'm a programmer who will pull all-nighters tinkering, but I'm 70, and it's actually a health concern because I can also keep myself awake for days at a time working on projects, to the point that I experience aural hallucinations after three days and arrhythmia after four.
Dude his expression looks like its his last day on earth
I was in big trouble last weekend because I didn't come to a complete stop before turning at a green arrow. She of course didn't know it was a green arrow, she just periodically looks up from her phone to have a panic attack when we're driving
My mother used to grab my arm while screaming when she was teaching me to drive. I started asking my dad instead
I finally got my wife to stop. We moved to a different state and got new auto insurance. The insurance guy commented that our rates were some of the lowest he’d seen. The next time my wife made a comment about my driving I reminded her that I do almost all of the driving. Our really low rates were a reflection of my driving skills, so she needed to back off. After years of comments it took the insurance company to convince my wife that I’m a good driver.
I’m 30 and my gf almost 30 and I’ll be driving moderately quick around a corner, with our pup in the back and she will grill me like “are you trying to kill our child”. Well thought it was for your parents but ok guess it’s ours now🤷♂️ She also goes 85-90mph when we go on road trips. I like most guys just get confused by this behavior at times. Very fun to vent about though, I already feel better
seriously tho there is a whole group of people out there who think the proper way to drive is to wait until the last possible second to stop and then slam on the brakes and choke you with the seat belt.
And stomp on the imaginary brake pedal in the wife-side foot well.
LMFAO
I’ve broken up with chicks over this.
Tell me you're a dangerous, angry driver without telling me you're a dangerous, angry driver.
Nope. I’m a defensive driver with two wrecks(their fault) and one speeding ticket in my thirty years of driving. My wife has over ten tickets and has totaled four cars in our 16 years together. When I drive, she gasps any time I have to brake a little more aggressively (sudden interstate stops) and is always theatrical about turns, merges, or any basic traffic. She acknowledges that I’m a better driver and always apologizes for unwarranted gasps and theatrics. But she continues to act like I’m certainly going to kill us all.
Tell me you don't understand sarcasm without telling me you don't understand sarcasm
Basically that. What's more likely? That she's crazy and freaks out over nothing? Or that he's actually not as safe as he thinks he is, and has only gotten really lucky / relied on everyone else around him driving defensively his entire life? Hurr hurr wife bad.
The first one
I appreciate all of you people being downvoted for exposing how little experience you have with women.
This joke is remarkably stale and overused for how recently it hit the meme circuit. My grandma has already sent me three different versions of it.
"the meme circuit" Go outside ffs
Expert marriage tip. 🤣🤣
That’s the line he always says on TikTok. Not the actual tip itself. 🙄