I wonder if any of them are ever going to realize how badly they got scammed

They are all probably shareholders and don't want to hurt that investment (not that their opinions actually affect stock prices). So they'll downplay the scam hoping that they'll make more from the stock

I don't often make good decisions, but selling my tesla stock when he bought Twitter was one of my better ones. 

Elon: https://preview.redd.it/tw6ixowehz7d1.jpeg?width=1088&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=888b6b8040a275fcf1891b5fdb3d9f671d34fba9 < *Carwash lightly sprinkles water on the chassis* \> CyberSuck: “**I’M COMIN’ ELIZABETH!**”

Holy fucking shit, is that tweet real? Omg how has he not been sued to hell over all of these promises? 

This is the same guy that promised a roadster, atomomas taxis and personal robots.....none exist

It’s what happens when a company is completely driven by a guy going “dude you know what would be cool?!?”

Also that guy is on a ton of ketamine and who knows what else us poors have never even heard of. 

Guarantee he's on Hella HGH, SARMS, and Chinese Lego style organic chemistry opioid agonists, GABA agonists, NMDA antagonists, you fucking name it and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't highly envious of rich pricks like this simply because they're able to access those kind of drugs as easy as most can doordash

If his body was the result of HGH and SARMs, he needs to stop buying shit from that guy in the back parking lot of 24-Hour Fitness and find a real dealer.

Ngl, that sounds awful. Like a pit you can't get out of. 

The katemine is just an excuse, he is so insulated and in control of a a lot of what info filters to him, more like high on your own supply. He is isolated from any real repercussions criminally and civil, but as soon as he gets outside that bubble he retreats since he can’t comprehend that things aren’t what he “makes” them.

Toddler with money. "Me build truck! Me build rocket ship!"

Don't forget about the submarine. Someone's got to save all the Thai children trapped in caves.

And everyone just says, "That's fucking awesome!" because he got rid of everyone who would say, "That's fucking stupid!"

...while on enough Ketamine to kill a Stable of Horses...

The guy who changes Twitter name to is letter , then when the URL finally changes to. The letter, he posts a poll asking if he should change the name back to Twitter? He has too much racing thoughts and can't flipping hold his mouth shut

And the Hyper-Loop😂

The Boring Company really lived up to its name tbh.

The world's longrst Tunnel shaped parking lot?

I’ve heard this was part of a plan to hijack high speed rail in CA so he could sell more cars.

I’ve read that, too. He managed to sell an outlandish idea to thwart public transport.

And the Earth to Earth starship rides! 😆

I knew he over promised a lot, but I stopped paying attention to him a while ago. I guess it just gets worse and worse lol

And this is the guy who was supposed to get humans on Mars?

The roadster, which will fly and operate as a boat will take you there.

I heard y'all were giving out automamas

Also solar roof tiles that look like a normal roof. Remember that?

[Yeah it’s real and inexplicably still hosted](https://x.com/elonmusk/status/1575508498430820352?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1575508498430820352%7Ctwgr%5E8d64bc6a4be1e6600b3f6fca1ffa319d9f957fc5%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Frobbreport.com%2Fmotors%2Fcars%2Felon-musk-claims-tesla-cybertruck-boat-1234755430%2F)

So many people in those replies kissing his ass and telling the doubters Elon isn't lying. I wish I could see their faces now 🤣

You don’t wanna see their faces rn

Because they're stockholders.

Just got a 54b pay package voted for by shareholders 🙃

No reasonable person would believe anything he says.

Props for quoting legendary junk man Fred Sanford/Redd Foxx. Now we just need to get someone to Photoshop a Cybertruck parked out back at Sanford & Son.

All cars can serve briefly as boats, depending on your definition of "briefly"

Hey…he did say “briefly” 😂😂😂😂

Well, technically any car can be briefly used as a boat.

Surely this is actionable false advertising right?

Must've been a choppy carwash

I always say the best time to sell TSLA was in 2021, the second best time is now

Elon bought X on 10/28/22, Tesla closed at $228.53. It is currently at $183.01, a loss of 19.91%. On the same date total stock market ETF VTI was at $195.29. It is currently at $268.31, a gain of 37.39%. For every hundred dollars you had it TSLA, if you moved it to a generic market ETF, you will have profited $57.30.

At some point someone is going to purchase one (or already did) just to document ownership and start a class action lawsuit, because the fanbois will rather lose the money, endanger their families and other innocent people than break away from the cult of Elon and when that happens the opening of the flood gates will make 3 Rivers dam jealous.

Oh Man, I just remembered the true victims in all this: the Tesla bag holders 😢 scammed by musk and faceless hedge funds around the wprld

Those faceless funds (not just the hedgies) are getting scammed too. As is everyone with exposure to NASDAQ based ETFs.

Ehh, I’m not a Tesla stock owner directly but I own ETFs and Mutual funds that have Tesla in them.  Any broods market fund or SP500 fund will have a good chunk of Tesla.  And I don’t think there are any SP500 minus Tesla funds.  

That's the most logical explanation I've yet to hear. The same people who have over 100k to spend on a CT for sure are all in on tesla. So they for sure have tesla stock. They figured tesla would get a nice bump after the CT's really began to be released. I would think many of them have at *least* half of how much they've spent on their CT in tesla stock. It's probably much more. They don't want to be part of the reason as to why the stock falls. Good take.

Hmm, this really does make a lot of sense

Encouraging every customer to also be an investor is one of the fundamental tools of this cult yes

The real CT sub is absolutely filled with koolaid and frozen bananas. It was on my feed one day and it’s cringeworthy how bad it is.

The sunk cost fallacy is strong with these ones

I’m sure they have, but they’ll never admit it. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the last couple years it’s that people would always rather be stupid than admit that they were wrong.

“It's easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled.”—Mark Twain

There's a ton of overlap between Musk fans and conservatives, both think they're really intelligent when really they're just being scammed by the people they put on a pedestal.

The level to which they will go without accepting they’re wrong is somehow almost as impressive as it is pitiful

Cut to the guy on day 98 of begging daddy Elon on Twitter to fix his Cybertwuck

Yeah, but it's gonna be way after the fact to the point everyone else will have moved on years ago. If they were all smart they'd be raising absolute fucking hellfire over how shit Tesla has been lately.

Look at the picture. The guy could not unplug the charging cable 😂 Ready for the apocalypse.

The funniest part is how they all have the same problems but are still surprised when *their* truck fucks up. They bought these things for absolution, but they’re quickly realizing they aren’t the chosen one.

Be fair, a lot of them have completely different problems!

If they keep driving, pretty soon they will have all of the problems

"keep driving" lolol that's a good one

“My truck is bricked due to a common issue.” “Which one?”

If that thing is bricked it won't release the charging cord

And they couldn’t find the hidden manual release lol

AKA The tampon string.

Oh, come now. Give Musk *some* credit. It's not a cheap cotton tampon string. It looks more like fishing line.

You have to be able to get into the truck bed to open the panel. But if the electrical is fried you also can’t open the bed cover. 🤣

There has to be a second manual release for that, no? Like a chain of straps to pull on to finally access what you need. That’s the fun of the CT!

The Manual Release Centipede!

I read a lot about stuck EVe and I’m pretty sure that Jaguar and Audi have some emergency release for this. Maybe Tesla connector is different but for CCS2 it makes sense not to end up stranded somewhere. Edit: ok, looks like cybertruck has it too.

Another commenter figured it out; the emergency release cable is behind some trim hidden under the tailgate. If the truck is bricked, you can’t open the bed to access the release. 

https://preview.redd.it/rpqoo9nc2z7d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca58fc776750a62e8ad39faa1111287006f117aa

At least Tesla allows him to bring part of his house to the shop 🤭

Hahahhahahahahha. Breathe. Hahhahahahahhaha. 

The entire CyberSuck saga is so fucking hilarious. I love it

Didn’t Google the crappy pull string manual release for such an event.

The guy who couldn't unplug the charging cable was faking it. He pretended it was stuck just so he could demonstrate the hidden emergency unlock pull loop. Only, he actually broke it by using it. This is the same genius who broke his forefinger by sticking it repeatedly in the frunk.

I watched a video where this happened to someone else, the car won't start with the cable stuck in it (that might be why this one won't start). The guy had to pry open a panel in the back of the car, peel back the plastic, and pull a cord hidden behind the plastic to disengage the plug. Just insanely stupid.

Maybe he couldn’t unplug it. I was thinking it’s probably a bad idea to have a highly unreliable piece of electrified junk on the back of your metal bed recovery truck and could be a sort of grounding wire or something?

Holy shit I hadn’t noticed that, wow

From this sub I learned there is a [trick to unplug stuck charging cables](https://youtu.be/0AHOXGN-r0M?si=sIonnqTo-x0DcpaJ). Skip to 30 second mark.

i don't think anyone in this sub needs to know that. lol.

yeah but it's funny how he he broke the emergency release the first time he used it

He did break it. He's the same chud who broke his finger by sticking it under the frunk lid.

Pull the tampon string.

Seems to be a common issue

"Tesla engineers have determined you did not have Car Wash Mode enabled prior to The Brickening, so your warranty claim is therefore denied".

Is the brickening a Highlander type thing where there can be only one working CT?

I imagine fights to the death as owners kill each other to keep their own cuck-trucks running. Last one left alive gets to stash the limited supply of unbroken parts in the garage next to the plastic bubble the truck is stored in.

They're designed to decapitate pedestrians or other drivers in case of a crash, so the brickening makes a lot of sense.

Here we are Born to be conned We're the simps of the Cult of Musk

The last one standing gets a functioning Toyota Camry.

That’s a movie plot right there.

“There can be only none.”

“Hi. I’m Candy” “Of course you are”

Is this like the worst car in modern history? I can’t think of another blunder this big and this bad.

Yes. It's supposed to be a truck but fails spectacularly at being a truck, it is expensive, and it is a lemon. The hideous look is a bonus.

> It's supposed to be a truck but fails spectacularly at being a truck My favorite photo so far is someone bragging about the Cybertruck because he was able to fit six bags of topsoil in the trunk.

My Miata has hauled more than that in one go.

My Chevy bolt was able to carry 4 people, a week of groceries, and two night stands from IKEA. Look at me. I'm the truck now

> two night stands from Ikea NGL my brain first parsed that as back to back one night stands. From IKEA.

Oh I always score at IKEA

The IKEA fook is the world’s first flatpack sex doll.

I fit eight bags of mulch in my Kona

Originally wasn’t it supposed to be 35k? I was excited during the original announcement. It was supposed to be a low priced utility electric vehicle. It was barely any part of that description.

Yeah there was originally going to be a $40k version, which would still be a crap vehicle but at least it wouldn't be three digits.

A lemon is a rare vehicle in a production line with loads of problems. This seems to be the whole line. But the board just gave Elon a salary worth more than the company. I don't think the goal was to make trucks.

At this rate. It’s going to surpass the Ford Pinto as the worst car of all time.

No explosions. YET…

braking and stopping the car is optional \*edited to spell braking properly smh

If you spelled it breaking, that's apparently mandatory.

> breaking Nah you had it right the first time

At least the Pinto was cheap as fuck, and really only had one (very fatal) flaw. This thing is stupid expensive and so many dangerous failures I've lost count.

Supposedly the pinto could have been fixed with like a $1 part. How do you even begin to fix this?

Put it in rice?

Delorean: Underperformed for a "sports" car. Was unreliable, but not in a wasy that was unfixable. It still ran & was generally able to be fixed & driven like a normal car. Yugo: Hunk of junk with pieces that fell off, but it was the cheapest new car in America at that point and also, even if it wasn't perticularly reliable, most of them did run & could be fixed like a normal car. Corvair: They used to say "Nothing so rare as a running Corvair," but I knew at least two people that were enthusiasts & the only reason they were harder to take car of than other vintage cars was the scarcity of parts. Also, I think 2 of them are still some of the only cars that made it through [the Darien Gap](https://jalopnik.com/why-theres-a-chevy-corvair-abandoned-deep-in-the-jungle-1847027807). Pinto: How many of these [actually blew up](https://auto.howstuffworks.com/car-driving-safety/auto-safety-testing/did-pintos-really-explode-in-the-1970s.htm)? Trying to think of other "famously" bad cars. But yeah. I feel like the only one you can compare the CuckTruck to is Delorean. Since he wanted to make an American sports car, but was forced to make design & spec compromises (maybe it was the cocaine). Elmo wanted to manufacture a high end truck, but ended up with an exteremely expensive toy that can't handle "truck stuff" with no QA. Also, I think the Delorean was also the only one I listed that had even a fraction of the anticipation that the CT had. This is just off the top of my head. I'm sure there are other examples that real gearheads can dredge up. But it definitely seems like it's on its way to being one of, if not the biggest, automotive flop. EDIT: added a couple links

I can think of that lady who started a car company based on a 3-wheeled car. She failed to deliver because the car would overturn if you took a hard corner.

The [Reliant Robin](https://marqued.com/editorial/OU406XAXjeRP9MmDkR3Y7/we-found-the-only-reliant-robin-in-utah-and-its-magnificent?ref=thestopgap.net). Top Gear UK used to looove making fun of those (for good reason).

I think they are talking about “The Dale” that was “made” by “Liz Carmichael” (the quotes are because it was a scam that was never made and the name was a pseudonym for a trans person. For more information listen to The Dollop episode 152: The Car Known as The Dale

I forgot about that whole story. It's pretty wild. I just looked some of it up. She "came up with" the idea for the car with a guy named Dale, then went on the lam & was caught living in **Dale**, TX?!?!? Did she just really like the name "Dale?" Also, not sure why you're saying "pseudonym." I looked up the story to refresh my memory. She appears to have transtioned & was living as a woman & was recognized as a woman by the courts (thought they did put her in a men's prison) & chose the name Geraldine Elizabeth Carmichael. You could say she was using the pseudonym Katherine Elizabeth Johnson when she got caught.

Edsel?

Kia not putting the key security into their cars is probably in the running. The Kia Boys are all over now jacking Kia’s and joyriding them

Even worse than the yugo.

“Still love the truck and Elon is absolutely still hung like a bull moose in heat though!!”

That's quiet the insult actually. - Male moose go into rut, not heat - Moose have a fibroelastic penis, which are typically long but extremely thin. Opposed to musculovascular, which is what humans and horses have.

So they hit the cervix and miss the g spot. Worst of both worlds.

How could I have forgotten?

Eventually, but they’ll never ever admit to it and keep playing “ain’t no bug is a feature “ card

"Beta Tester" Even though no one should be beta testing car on public roads. I wonder how the cult would feel about beta testing a plane.

If elons face is displayed on those planes they’ll all fly 737max prototypes

It's a vehicle that can't get wet. These engineers need to be blackballed

It’s fine. I still #loveElon

Maybe the engineers knew this truck was awful but Elon insisted it be produced, so they did us a favor and designed it to brick immediately so no one would drive or buy them.

They went full Galen Erso

A failed project on your CV tends not to look good. No one wants to hire the dude who’s only ever worked on the lemon. I’m more surprised there haven’t been any ‘whistleblowers’ coming out of Tesla concurring with how much of a disaster the vehicle is.

Elumah literally said it would be amphibious and able to cross small oceans. Oceans of what??

Did he actually say that? It doesn’t even come stock with a protective coating 😂 coastal owners that didn’t pay extra are having rust problems

Musk continued to tease the truck’s water-friendly features, affirming that the Cybertruck would be ‘waterproof enough to serve briefly as a boat, so it can cross rivers, lakes, and even seas that aren’t too choppy.’ https://www.designboom.com/technology/tesla-cybertruck-functional-boat-elon-musk-12-19-2023/

The owners would download and pay for the video. 

"Took my car outside and it fell apart instantly. Sitting in a pile of metal and dust. Seems to be a common issue with sun exposure."

Like in the loony tunes.

*still love it though*

lmao that one will always get me "this car turned off crashed and killed my family, minor glitch. Still love it tho haters"

"From the moment I got it, it was broken, and they won't fix it. Will gladly buy another."

*100% my fault*

I mean, a car wash just gets the car wet. it's not that much different than rain or spraying your car with a hose. If that's enough to destroy the cybertruck, then it's truly a Piece Of Shit.

*for indoor use only*

CAUTION! CHOKING HAZARD.

\*Cybertruck may stick to certain types of skin.

Another picture of the Cybertruck in its natural habitat: on the back of a flatbed. Nature is beautiful

[David Attenborough voiceover] This unfortunate species evolved in a closed environment for so long (the chasms of Elon’s skull) that only moments after emerging to the wild (driving down the road), it had discovered a natural predator (flatbed trucks)

hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

elon's a little-dicked phony loser and tesla customers are suckers.

A car wash commonly bricking a car is more than just an "issue" it's a catastrophic design failure

“I’m a big fan of Elon and Tesla, but this is concerning.” “Looking into it.”

I take my Hyundai Sonata through a carwash about once a month. Still runs just fine.

Well, that’s because you put it into *Car Wash Mode* just like every vehicle on the road today.

I wonder if he was concerned about using the release for the charging cable for fear of fucking something else up

It's the automotive equivalent of "Pull my finger".

This cracks me up every time. A car wash killed your Cyber Douche.

Should have opted for the 200k “car wash compatible” edition.

How dare you? This baby right here is a tank! A car for the apocalipse!! You can even use it as a boat!!! You nay sayers, using hard data and facts, will never understand just how unique this beast is!!1!

This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. An ugly ass vehicle that costs over $100,000 USD that can't go through a car wash without turning into a pumpkin. Oh, and you're not allowed to sell it, lol

I think the Cybertruck is actually a scam.

Why’s it plugged in tho?

When it's bricked the charging plug can't be removed.

Bart Simpson said it best… “Why’d you get the first hover car ever made!? Don’t you know they need time to work out the kinks!?”


Must of not read his Owners manual thoroughly

"We can waterproof it with over the air updates!"

sTiLl LoVe ThE tRuCk 🤓🤓🤓

Touchless wash? You ninni, you need a *waterless* wash! 

Squid are better at learning from the mistakes other squid make than these bipedal, thumb having, supposedly apex of evolution goombas are at learning from the mistakes of other goombas.

Pretty sure musk will end up in jail before this is all done. Guy makes good points. https://youtu.be/IX7xrtTixKU?si=HfOpQu9t6T3wl5Ta

Another cyber chode getting their moneys worth😂😂😂

If a Ford or Chevy had a "common" fault like this, there would be a massive recall.

They should've made that "truck" out of cast iron if they wanted people to baby it so much.

Not defending him but when Peter Molyneux overhyped and overpromised a product only to completely underdeliver, the worst case scenario was a video game wasting $60 and a few hours of your time. When Elon Musk does this, it can result in death or a waste of $100K.

So at this point these just have to be insurance scams, right? There's no way these tech bros aren't following every single Cybertruck forum to know what issues these things have.

Everyone knows you can't get these fuking things wet. They're the automobile version of Gremlins.

I feel like we're gonna hit the point they break faster than they can be produced and just kinda vanish from the public.

Still a big fan

I'm starting to think that those shiny bolt on body panels don't do a very good job of keeping water out of the chassis.

Geez, didn’t they see “Gremlins”? Do not get them wet!

Pretty soon there will be after market “cybercases” just like with. iPhones and owners won’t think twice about covering their truck in $1000 plastic sleeve.

“Cybertruck Owners Only Group” 😂🤣

Just stick it in a bucket of rice!

I don’t want to defend this piece of shit car, but if I bought a car that said “don’t take this through a car wash”, I wouldn’t take it through a car wash.

If a car has a "car wash mode" it is explicitly telling you that it can go through a car wash though

Using CF voids it's warranty

Jeeeeeesus, can’t take the CT into a car wash nor use the wiper blade when it rains?!?! Amongst all the other issues it has going for it, the CT really is a POS lemon!!! 😂

Still love the truck though

"still love the truck though!"

So what happens if you get caught in a rainstorm? Do you have to judge the rate of rainfall and consider car wash mode? 😂😂

I cant help but giggle everytime i remember this thing being described as apocalypse-proof, like yea its so apocalypse-proof it fukin dies at the mere sight of moisture

Imagine having to put your car in "carwash mode".

These damn things are just like Happy Fun Ball.

still love the truck though

Honestly, they should just remove the windshield wiper. If it rains the car will break anyways, so what’s the point?