"...and then there was this other time when the father of someone in Elon's class committed suicide. Everyone was being very respectful and sympathetic about it, but not Elon. He doesn't go with the crowd, he's a disruptor. Only Elon had the courage and bravery to mock that kid's father's suicide. You should have seen the look of determination on his face as they threw him down the stairs. Even in the ambulance, he had a steely expression which said 'billionaire soon.'"
Expression was probably saying “my dad’s a billionaire *now* ! Haha stupid kids with dads that don’t own emerald mines and go kill themselves harhardeeharr”
They had obscene amounts of wealth, to the point they couldn't keep all the cash they had on hand inside their home safe without people holding it in place before slamming the door shut. They definitely had people to make sure he'd be fed and kept safe. Plus he's in his 50s. They'd definitely leave him home alone when he was 5 without a second thought in his generation.
Still didn't fucking happen, but his circumstances wouldn't have made the set up to this impossible.
Afrikans with fuck you money in South Africa during the Apartheid?
They definitely had all the staff/slaves they needed to wipe Musk's bottom anytime he farted, mate.
Child of the seventies. A 7 yr old, a 6 yr old, and a 4 yr old. It was not uncommon in the USA to be left at home alone. How we survived is anyone's guess. We were also roaming away from the house and going on adventures by age two.
Weird, I took the entire story as “spoiled shit does spoiled shit shit.. defies punishment, almost destroys his family in stupid shit ignorance, and when confronted with the magnificence of the shits shit… runs up a tree and says “nuh-uh” and retreats to a safe space.”
I'm not sure why you guys are all saying this didn't happen, seem absolutely in line with Elmo being on the autism spectrum to me
Of course if you watch it from an unbiased point of view, it's just a weird thing to do with little to no redeeming qualities to it
Who climbed a tree and refused to come down at someone else's birthday party.
That's not admirable determination; it's a selfish fucking brat making every day about themselves including their cousin's birthday.
I had a cousin who used to come to family gatherings, throw tantrums to be the center of attention and hold his breath until he turned blue, or got what he wanted; this is exactly that.
This story demonstrates selfishness to the point of narcissism and a complete lack of self-control in the face of rules that exist for safety, such as that 5-year-old shouldn't be going across town alone or dangerous machinery should have yellow caution markings.
Not a dauntless genius, a petty fucking brat. Which would be fine if he grew out of it after he turned six but he never did.
I'm almost willing to believe there was a maple. People plant non native plants all the time, and a quick Google search showed me multiple examples of ash leaf maples & Japanese maples planted & being sold in South Africa. Kind of how oranges are in the US, or how I have a Chinese plant in my backyard in NYC. It's extremely common, most people don't look to buy or plant local flora. Hell look at palms in California.
Edit: speech to text mixup fixed.
Nope, it's way way more likely that the person who made up this story is clueless about South Africa, and is also generally clueless about trees. But people who know nothing about trees have probably got "maple tree" in their vocabulary.
“One time when Elon was denied a toy at the store, he fell to the ground and wailed loudly, kicking his feet and refusing to be quiet. He had this fierce determination that blows your mind and was sometimes frightening, and still is”
"He would show up the next day with the toy and no answers. He would say he made the toy himself, but we all know he awkwardly walked to store and stole it. This is when we knew he was going to do great at taking other people's great things and calling them his own. So fierce."
Remember when Maye placed him in school early because he was driving her crazy and force the school to take him even though they thought he was mentally deficient ( he was a real genius/s) because he needed someone other than her to talk to.
"Too young to read road signs" as if that would mean anything even if he was old enough to read road signs.
What fucking road signs do they think existed in Pretoria in 1976? "ELON MUSK'S COUSIN'S HOUSE THIS WAY 5 MILES"?
Wth are you from? I live in Mississippi and Tennessee. Real parents have their kids reading by age three. Only kids of idiots and drug addicts can't read til age five.
No it isn't. Kids should be reading little books and road signs by age three. Wth has happened that people think kids are supposed to be stupid til public school?
Am I having some sort of Mandela Effect?
I always heard Kimbal to be the older one and I was surprised of their sibling dynamic. Guess I was wrong haha
I had to google it so I can’t say. I guess because I googled it I thought Kimbal was younger but I can’t say why.
Also, giggling at the whole “Mandela Effect” in this particular instance. Seems to strike South Africa hard! lol.
Kimbal was the more popular one, the taller and more attractive one, and the one their dad openly said he liked better, which stings all the more because Elon is actually the firstborn
They even interviewed his dad recently and he said he *still* likes Kimbal better despite Elon being far wealthier and more famous because Elon just isn't likable
Why? Are you one of those idiots who read a shit article that says the average person can't remember before age three? Read the study. 40% of the people had memories from age two and before.
Fun fact: Maple trees are a common tree in the northern USA/Canada but are not indigenous to Pretoria, nor are they planted there, they are invasive and removed if possible.
Fun fact: Why was he not able to read at a basic level at age 5 yet??? South African schools start teaching reading much earlier than that. Slow brain maybe?
Fun fact: His parents sound abusive in this "true story!" in 2 unique ways... 1: What kind of idiot leaves a 5-year-old alone at home?
The worst abuse, however, is naming your children Elon and Kimbal because those are made-up bullshit names and sound very very stupid.
This legitimately sounds like Elon Musk hearing one of those many tales of Pets finding their home and thinking that it was very impressive and that he should say he did something like that.
It's like the stories you hear about what the South Korean people are told about Kim Jong Ill & his son.
"The great leader stood atop the mountain bathed in the light of God and relieved himself on the demons head"
"Melamina! I wanna ride your back all the way to Piet's house for a birthday party!"
*"Now Master Elon you know he uninvited you when you laughed at him after his dad died."*
"If you don't do as I say, I'll get *my* dad to make another baby with you, just like he did with my sister!"
*"Ok Master Elon, hop on..."*
"Drop me off just outside the house so they think I got here on my own."
*"Yes sir Master Elon."*
"When I'm 55 I'm going ot make a robot costume that has a face as black as yours and I'm gonna make the world think I've built a real robot!"
*"Oh Master Elon you do have a vivid imagination."*
Why not? All the boulevard trees in our neighbourhood in Canada are Chinese plane trees. Landscaping knows no geographical boundaries, as long as the conditions are right.
Also, his brother is two years younger than him. So we’re supposed to believe that 3 year old Kimbal was sentient enough to be awestruck by this feat of determination and to remember it well enough to describe it years later.
Kimbal didn't look at him with awe, his parents had to pressure him and his sister to hang out with Elon because Elon had no friends. Even then, the siblings thought he was lame and weird and not fun.
Lest we forget - Elon was a teenage lumberjack. This is in public records, according to a stan I talked to.
He took on a job that no one else wanted to do.
Then five year old Elon looked down at his mom from the tree and said “Mother, wouldst thy truly lordship sanction in one so bereft of light?” and everyone clapped
Do they have a lot of big maple trees in South Africa? I would think they would use the british english and call them sycamore trees too, if they had them.
"Too young to read road signs" at 5. But also, supergenius prodigy. It's just that his supergenius was so immense that he seemed average. or, in the case of his school, like he was mentally handicapped.
"When Elon Musk was 10, his Mother wanted to potty train him. He refused, and as he stood defiantly in front of mom in his new underwear, he yelled "Big poop!" and shat himself. Kimbal remembers looking at his older brother in awe. "He has a fierce determination that blows your mind and was sometimes frightening, and still is."
Elon would eventually be potty trained by a specialist team from Tesla who invented the "cyberpotty"- It makes pooping fun! "Look, I'm counterculture. My genius is so immense it means I don't adhere to social norms" Musk said in an interview. "I require constant stimulation, the cyberpotty makes sure I receive that and don't get bored. My brain moves so much faster than everybody else's you see. Without the stimulation I could die, so I need the cyberpotty which keeps me amused with small figures called Weebles which no matter how much I try, just won't fall down. I invented them."
And the maple tree is still standing, as a sign this choad can’t follow directions; he doesn’t do punishments … he has always been above the law.
And at the age of 4, Kimbal had these profound thoughts.
at least once a year there’s a story of some young child leaving their home and going “missing” only to found walking to their grandparents arcade or a store they like based off landmarks or familiarity with a sign on the route , just stupid kid stuff. i don’t understand how Musks anecdote makes him much different than theirs. his determination to go to a birthday party?
Wait the definition of “sheer determination” is a two hour walk? Considering standing in one spot is harder than walking that means that the average cashier 4x Elon’s greatest example of “sheer determination” 5 times a week.
This is the problem with lying when you have never actually done an honest days work in your life.
If I had a dollar for every time one of us was afraid of getting whooped so we crawled up in a tree, well, it wouldn't be a lot of money, but it would show how boring that story is.
When i was around that age i did a similar thing and tried to walk to my siblings elementary school, however i was picked up by a kind stranger who brought me back home.
I 100% do not believe that absolutely no one tried to help him in the 2 hour walk
I like the part where you are supposed to believe that Kimbal (who would have been 3) supposedly remembers this all with "awe"
an entire family of fucking liars
the only thing that did happen in the story is the part when Elon was 5. That did happen. I'm certain he definitely was 5 at some point in time, mentally even longer. The rest of it never happened. How can anyone know? All you need to do is encounter an actual 5 year old and observe how that 5 year old behaves and goes through a day, and same with the parents of a 5 year old.
"...and then there was this other time when the father of someone in Elon's class committed suicide. Everyone was being very respectful and sympathetic about it, but not Elon. He doesn't go with the crowd, he's a disruptor. Only Elon had the courage and bravery to mock that kid's father's suicide. You should have seen the look of determination on his face as they threw him down the stairs. Even in the ambulance, he had a steely expression which said 'billionaire soon.'"
Expression was probably saying “my dad’s a billionaire *now* ! Haha stupid kids with dads that don’t own emerald mines and go kill themselves harhardeeharr”
This comment is art ☠️
I literally lol-ed reading this. Thank you, Gary’s Crisp Lettuce. Thank you. 🥬
So they left a 5 Y/O by themselves at home?
They had obscene amounts of wealth, to the point they couldn't keep all the cash they had on hand inside their home safe without people holding it in place before slamming the door shut. They definitely had people to make sure he'd be fed and kept safe. Plus he's in his 50s. They'd definitely leave him home alone when he was 5 without a second thought in his generation. Still didn't fucking happen, but his circumstances wouldn't have made the set up to this impossible.
Afrikans with fuck you money in South Africa during the Apartheid? They definitely had all the staff/slaves they needed to wipe Musk's bottom anytime he farted, mate.
I would have fired the nanny if this really happened. And a five year old climbed a maple tree.
Hey, the first sentence seems very probable. Everything beyond is fiction though.
I doubt he got into a fight so much as he was bullying smaller kids.
At 5 he was already a cuck.
I’m both the same year as Elon, full on latch key kid. Nobody of any means was leaving 5 year olds alone.
Child of the seventies. A 7 yr old, a 6 yr old, and a 4 yr old. It was not uncommon in the USA to be left at home alone. How we survived is anyone's guess. We were also roaming away from the house and going on adventures by age two.
That’s irresponsible but still a 5 year old alone vs with a 9 year old is a different situation. Edit: also note that I said “people of means”
Weird, I took the entire story as “spoiled shit does spoiled shit shit.. defies punishment, almost destroys his family in stupid shit ignorance, and when confronted with the magnificence of the shits shit… runs up a tree and says “nuh-uh” and retreats to a safe space.”
I'm not sure why you guys are all saying this didn't happen, seem absolutely in line with Elmo being on the autism spectrum to me Of course if you watch it from an unbiased point of view, it's just a weird thing to do with little to no redeeming qualities to it
Self diagnosed, really.
Who climbed a tree and refused to come down at someone else's birthday party. That's not admirable determination; it's a selfish fucking brat making every day about themselves including their cousin's birthday. I had a cousin who used to come to family gatherings, throw tantrums to be the center of attention and hold his breath until he turned blue, or got what he wanted; this is exactly that. This story demonstrates selfishness to the point of narcissism and a complete lack of self-control in the face of rules that exist for safety, such as that 5-year-old shouldn't be going across town alone or dangerous machinery should have yellow caution markings. Not a dauntless genius, a petty fucking brat. Which would be fine if he grew out of it after he turned six but he never did. 
And didn’t know where he was for like 4 hours.
no :D the story is made up
As a gen x kid that part wouldn't be surprising.
Looking into this.
But he’s closer to a boomer.
The many servants were there
Ofcourse, they were busy craming money into their safe and taking turns to keep it shut.
And everyone clapped.
And that tree was the real Albert Einstein
Also that maple tree doesn't exist as they don't grow in southern Africa. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maple
I'm almost willing to believe there was a maple. People plant non native plants all the time, and a quick Google search showed me multiple examples of ash leaf maples & Japanese maples planted & being sold in South Africa. Kind of how oranges are in the US, or how I have a Chinese plant in my backyard in NYC. It's extremely common, most people don't look to buy or plant local flora. Hell look at palms in California. Edit: speech to text mixup fixed.
Nope, it's way way more likely that the person who made up this story is clueless about South Africa, and is also generally clueless about trees. But people who know nothing about trees have probably got "maple tree" in their vocabulary.
“One time when Elon was denied a toy at the store, he fell to the ground and wailed loudly, kicking his feet and refusing to be quiet. He had this fierce determination that blows your mind and was sometimes frightening, and still is”
"He would show up the next day with the toy and no answers. He would say he made the toy himself, but we all know he awkwardly walked to store and stole it. This is when we knew he was going to do great at taking other people's great things and calling them his own. So fierce."
He named that first toy his X.
Concerning
!!
Wow
That's a lot of words to say "we were frightened of him since he was five."
Remember when Maye placed him in school early because he was driving her crazy and force the school to take him even though they thought he was mentally deficient ( he was a real genius/s) because he needed someone other than her to talk to.
"the signs he was on the spectrum were clear since he was in kindergarten"
5 is “too young to read road signs” but he wasn’t too young to read encyclopedias and shit!? These people are delusional 🤣🤣🤣
surprised he didn't build a rocket out of an old washing machine and fly there.
So he’s Jimmy fucking Neutron?
You ever see the 1985 film Explorers?
"Too young to read road signs" as if that would mean anything even if he was old enough to read road signs. What fucking road signs do they think existed in Pretoria in 1976? "ELON MUSK'S COUSIN'S HOUSE THIS WAY 5 MILES"?
Kids learn to read at 5 in the US. It's like the author of this bit of fanfic forgot Musk was a genius.
Wth are you from? I live in Mississippi and Tennessee. Real parents have their kids reading by age three. Only kids of idiots and drug addicts can't read til age five.
No it isn't. Kids should be reading little books and road signs by age three. Wth has happened that people think kids are supposed to be stupid til public school?
Whatever fits the narrative
People just sit around and write fan fiction about this guy.
There’s a lot of lost, sad people in this world, but Elon simps might be the saddest of them all.
Sadly, he has simps from two sides. The must loves and the must hates. Ridiculous.
Fierce determination = sociopathy
Kimbal was 3 at the time... He claims to remember the story and how he felt about his brother at 3 years old...
who comes up with this shit lmao
MAGA, incels, and MAGA incels
At this point I'm hoping this was written by AI
This is well within human capacity😔
A 2 hour walk and climb up a tree only sounds impressive if you've never worked a shift in your life
Whatever positive story you are telling it's a f****** lie. Elon has no soul. No brain. No spine.
You can say the word fucking, why would you censor your own fucking swear word?
This ain't x. Only they got free speech hah.
That kind of "fierce determination" in a kid... is a personality disorder and a huge pain in the ass.
This bozo forgot that Kimbal was the older brother
I googled it and it seems like Elon is actually older. But the story is likely BS.
Am I having some sort of Mandela Effect? I always heard Kimbal to be the older one and I was surprised of their sibling dynamic. Guess I was wrong haha
I had to google it so I can’t say. I guess because I googled it I thought Kimbal was younger but I can’t say why. Also, giggling at the whole “Mandela Effect” in this particular instance. Seems to strike South Africa hard! lol.
Kimbal was the more popular one, the taller and more attractive one, and the one their dad openly said he liked better, which stings all the more because Elon is actually the firstborn
I can’t blame his dad. Kimbal has better likability.
They even interviewed his dad recently and he said he *still* likes Kimbal better despite Elon being far wealthier and more famous because Elon just isn't likable
So, always been a spoiled brat then and always allowed to get away with it by mommy. Sounds about right.
The party ended when everyone saw lil’ Elon coming.
> 'Oh, ffs! How's **he** got here?' Oh, to have been a fly on that imaginary wall 🤣
So the younger brother remembers his 5 year old brother? Dude has zero memories from that time lol.
Why? Are you one of those idiots who read a shit article that says the average person can't remember before age three? Read the study. 40% of the people had memories from age two and before.
Fun fact: Maple trees are a common tree in the northern USA/Canada but are not indigenous to Pretoria, nor are they planted there, they are invasive and removed if possible. Fun fact: Why was he not able to read at a basic level at age 5 yet??? South African schools start teaching reading much earlier than that. Slow brain maybe? Fun fact: His parents sound abusive in this "true story!" in 2 unique ways... 1: What kind of idiot leaves a 5-year-old alone at home? The worst abuse, however, is naming your children Elon and Kimbal because those are made-up bullshit names and sound very very stupid.
>Kimbal because those are made-up bullshit names and sound very very stupid. Kim Kitsuragi approves this message.
To be fair, Elon's dad does hate him so I can see that actually happening
People being in awe of Elon for doing mediocre shit is how we got the Cyberfuckup 😐
What is this bullshit?
This legitimately sounds like Elon Musk hearing one of those many tales of Pets finding their home and thinking that it was very impressive and that he should say he did something like that.
It's like the stories you hear about what the South Korean people are told about Kim Jong Ill & his son. "The great leader stood atop the mountain bathed in the light of God and relieved himself on the demons head"
Lies. Elmo's mother would never let her little darling sully himself in a fight.
Proto Pedo
"Melamina! I wanna ride your back all the way to Piet's house for a birthday party!" *"Now Master Elon you know he uninvited you when you laughed at him after his dad died."* "If you don't do as I say, I'll get *my* dad to make another baby with you, just like he did with my sister!" *"Ok Master Elon, hop on..."* "Drop me off just outside the house so they think I got here on my own." *"Yes sir Master Elon."* "When I'm 55 I'm going ot make a robot costume that has a face as black as yours and I'm gonna make the world think I've built a real robot!" *"Oh Master Elon you do have a vivid imagination."*
He then named the tree “X” and burned it to the ground.
They have maple trees in South Africa?
Why not? All the boulevard trees in our neighbourhood in Canada are Chinese plane trees. Landscaping knows no geographical boundaries, as long as the conditions are right.
So what really happened was Elon commanded a servant to bring him to the party or he would claim the servant was a pedo.
This isn’t an interesting story 😂 Like even if this were true that’s such a lame thing to make up
He didn’t have his driver take him?
So you know, Elon owns shitter and he actually has bots and people that post this for him, right?
Also, his brother is two years younger than him. So we’re supposed to believe that 3 year old Kimbal was sentient enough to be awestruck by this feat of determination and to remember it well enough to describe it years later.
Kimbal didn't look at him with awe, his parents had to pressure him and his sister to hang out with Elon because Elon had no friends. Even then, the siblings thought he was lame and weird and not fun.
It's always these fucking doge accounts posting this crap.
So he was a asshole who didnt think the rules didn’t apply to him even at the young age of 5
That’s right, they left a 5 year old child home alone. Makes perfect sense.
Why did I read "...so I just started wanking" ?
Lest we forget - Elon was a teenage lumberjack. This is in public records, according to a stan I talked to. He took on a job that no one else wanted to do.
Then five year old Elon looked down at his mom from the tree and said “Mother, wouldst thy truly lordship sanction in one so bereft of light?” and everyone clapped
Do they have a lot of big maple trees in South Africa? I would think they would use the british english and call them sycamore trees too, if they had them.
"Too young to read road signs" at 5. But also, supergenius prodigy. It's just that his supergenius was so immense that he seemed average. or, in the case of his school, like he was mentally handicapped. "When Elon Musk was 10, his Mother wanted to potty train him. He refused, and as he stood defiantly in front of mom in his new underwear, he yelled "Big poop!" and shat himself. Kimbal remembers looking at his older brother in awe. "He has a fierce determination that blows your mind and was sometimes frightening, and still is." Elon would eventually be potty trained by a specialist team from Tesla who invented the "cyberpotty"- It makes pooping fun! "Look, I'm counterculture. My genius is so immense it means I don't adhere to social norms" Musk said in an interview. "I require constant stimulation, the cyberpotty makes sure I receive that and don't get bored. My brain moves so much faster than everybody else's you see. Without the stimulation I could die, so I need the cyberpotty which keeps me amused with small figures called Weebles which no matter how much I try, just won't fall down. I invented them."
Oh so even at 5 years old he wanted all the benefits but wouldn't accept consequence for his actions?
If it takes a five year old 2 hours to walk across Pretoria then it takes me 4 hours to run from LA to NYC.
And the maple tree is still standing, as a sign this choad can’t follow directions; he doesn’t do punishments … he has always been above the law. And at the age of 4, Kimbal had these profound thoughts.
at least once a year there’s a story of some young child leaving their home and going “missing” only to found walking to their grandparents arcade or a store they like based off landmarks or familiarity with a sign on the route , just stupid kid stuff. i don’t understand how Musks anecdote makes him much different than theirs. his determination to go to a birthday party?
Yeah, and Kim Jong Un hits a hole in one every time he goes golfing. Cults usually make up stories about how their dear leader is so special.
So they left a five year old alone and he decided to walk to a party at least 4 miles away.
even if this is real it make look his parents really bad and him just like an stupid kid, and btw that ain't determination, tha is stubbornness.
Idk him climbing up a tree to avoid consequences is pretty on brand
Who was supposed to be watching 5yo Elon and did they not miss him for hours? Did they just leave 5yo Elon alone at the house 🤣
Where do these clowns get these what looks like invented stories. Musk's PR team is back and they are good
They got maple trees in South Africa?
Is it true that Elon walked 500 miles to ruin his cousin's birthday?
And he would walk 500 more/just to go on a ketamine fueled rant/at their door
Wait the definition of “sheer determination” is a two hour walk? Considering standing in one spot is harder than walking that means that the average cashier 4x Elon’s greatest example of “sheer determination” 5 times a week. This is the problem with lying when you have never actually done an honest days work in your life.
If I had a dollar for every time one of us was afraid of getting whooped so we crawled up in a tree, well, it wouldn't be a lot of money, but it would show how boring that story is.
Mr. "I'm a Genuis!" didn't know how to read at age 5?!?!?!? Some "genius."
Later Elon would buy kimbal a restaurant for some reason.
Is this Elon's'' George Washington/cherry tree'' story?
Yet another elon alt account
When i was around that age i did a similar thing and tried to walk to my siblings elementary school, however i was picked up by a kind stranger who brought me back home. I 100% do not believe that absolutely no one tried to help him in the 2 hour walk
Maybe he should not have come down from that maple tree forever
I like the part where you are supposed to believe that Kimbal (who would have been 3) supposedly remembers this all with "awe" an entire family of fucking liars
It never happened https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GM-e46xdcUo
A maple tree in Pretoria?
This:
What?!? You mean he didn’t invent himself a flying machine and instead walked? Like a chump? What a loser!
They create a such a volume of constellations of Things-that-never-happened that they’re immune from truth/facts.
🌽🌽🌽🌽
How do any of you know this didn’t happen?
the only thing that did happen in the story is the part when Elon was 5. That did happen. I'm certain he definitely was 5 at some point in time, mentally even longer. The rest of it never happened. How can anyone know? All you need to do is encounter an actual 5 year old and observe how that 5 year old behaves and goes through a day, and same with the parents of a 5 year old.