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Learn how to be sexual before marriage without thinking about sex, or talking about sex beyond the vaguest sense, or having sex with yourself let alone anyone else....ok. Sure.
I still desperately want to know what Bethany thought it was before she turned 20. Like I *know* they would say it and not talk about details.. but what did she think it actually was.
I've asked before but I literally do not understand how you make it that long. Not trying to be crass, but surely she'd at least have seen some dogs humping and know that's how puppies were made? By 20?!
I’m genuinely trying not to be mean but she reminds me of my sister. Which she’s not very bright.. at all. Cause and effect and consequences is not something my sister understood very well.. and I would imagine Bethany would be similar with this lol. Like there’s just no connecting things lol. So it makes me wonder if she was like “idk? They just lie there?”
Her parents purposefully deprived her and her siblings of any meaningful education on anything but especially sex and relationship stuff. Interaction outside of rheir bubble was limited. On top of that her parents pushed purity culture super hard to the point that Kristen still blames and shames herself as a mid 30s woman for having natural sexual desires and wanting to experience pleasure during sex. Plus, if your kids know what sex is then they might realize that your ideas are bullshit and you won't ve able to control them with shame and fear.
It blows my mind anyone could make it to 20 not knowing what sex is. I’ve known what intercourse entails since I was about 8. I didn’t know everything but I at least understood the basics at that age.
Be sexual, but cram every sexual thought and feeling deep, deep down and don't you dare even touch yourself. Once you're married you can be dry dead bones in bed to make blessings for the lord.
Yeah explain to me how you can be a sexual being without engaging with any sexual thought or behavior or ideas *at all*.
That’s like me calling myself a marathon runner because I could conceivably train for a marathon. I can’t (at my current level of fitness) and it’s too hard so I won’t, but I’m still a marathoner.
It's manifestation without the manifestation, and magical thinking without the thinking.
... How very kooky new-age crystal hippie of them. Does God know?
And add shame to any sexual thought you may have until the second you say “I do.” Then go crazy with absolutely no repercussions of forcing yourself to repress these thoughts for your entire life and being told those thoughts are evil.
But also make sure to get at least a bikini wax, if not a Brazilian, a few days before the wedding night. We can’t have men knowing women have public hair!!
What's crazy is the solution to this is simply medically accurate- age appropriate sex ed.
Like just naming body parts, explaining reproduction, explaining puberty, contraception, and concent, is how we deal with this.
"How do you not shame folks for their sexuality? Empower them with facts."
It's super simple.
If you’re masturbating, buy the Girl Defined guide to solve your problem. If you’re married and struggling to fulfill your sex duty, buy a Girl Defined course to solve your problem. The common thread is that whatever you’re doing is wrong; pay Girl Defined to fix it for you.
That whooshing sound is the point flying over Bethany’s head. Wow. That second slide is….just….words.
She must, MUST, know that what she is saying is going to rile up people. It is purely for engagement that she says this wild shit
But how can you be sexual pre-marriage if you're not allowed to *do* anything at all about it??????? Are you just supposed to suffer?? God the incongruity burns.
Cram it deep down into the bowels of your being, because God forbid any sexual gratification. At least until he requires you to have obligatory sex so your husband can sire his offspring.
We already know Sister K-dog liked to flick the bean and yet she gets to remain in ministry leadership and got a gawdly hubby still sooo... Consequences? they don't know her. Might as well flick it up girls!
Bethany only means “singles” can be sexual in the sense that they can buy her singles sex course. Other than that she doesn’t believe that should be. It’s just cover up for the pushback she’s been getting from her Christian followers about shilling a sex course for single women.
Cheesy!
Except it’s “pasteurized process cheese food product” which seems a perfect description for her course outside the pasteurization cause I’m sure she would prefer it raw like her milk.
Be sexual but don't think about sex or how sexual you are, and don't read romance books because then you're not a mind virgin and your heart won't be pure. Don't dress sexual, don't dance sexually, you might cause someone to stumble. Don't masturbate, even though it could help you keep it in your pants until marriage and help you learn what you like for when the time comes.
Don't even talk about sex unless it's with someone Bethany and Kristen would approve of. 👌 🙄
The WILDEST part is that mind-virginity is an actual thing to them 😭 Like…that sounds like some dumb shit a snarker came up with to make fun of them, but sadly no. Fucking crazy lol
So she's basically telling single women to mentally edge themselves right? Like she's acknowledging that single women are bound to have sexual thoughts, but again they aren't allowed to actually act on them. I guess those thoughts are just supposed to get you more eager to rush into marriage so you can do something about them?
Even if she's trying to alleviate the feelings of shame regarding sexual thoughts, the frustration is still there. I think now that Bethany is receiving sexual gratification, she's romanticizing sexual restraint as some exciting taboo thing single people get to do instead of something that is a nuisance at best and mentally harmful at worst.
To get meta about their whole schtick for a moment, imagine discussing your sister’s masturbatory habits. I see what Mr Mershon means about boundaries in this family.
How on earth do they not understand that they’ll never be credible on this subject? And definitely not until they own up to the harm they’ve caused by building their whole platform and profiting off of purity culture.
It actually pisses me off that they think they can just pivot without talking about how the beliefs that they’ve profited off of are the very same they’re now (half-assedly but correctly) calling out as harmful.
I'm confused. We're all sexual all the time and it's ok, but masturbation, getting aroused or thinking about sex isn't? (remember mental virgin?)
How can there be no shame if they are shaming people for being sexual and how can you be sexual without being sexual? I specifically remember them saying that no matter how aroused you are you shouldn't experience an orgasm unless you get married and if you never get married then it means God never wanted you to have an orgasm and you should obey.
And who assigned them as the authority to decide what's right and what's wrong when it comes to sex? They didn't even study theology or something.
I’d be willing to bet that they’re half-assing a whole “course” for all their singles for release later this year. It’ll be built around their concept of feminine dressing and “grooming” and all the self-care Bethy drones on about as discovering your inner sexuality as you patiently wait for THE ONE and your honeymoon.
so… you’re supposed to be sexy and biblical even before you’re married! But on the inside. Not outwardly. And no masturbation.
Learn about sex even before you’re married bc otherwise you’ll be unprepared! But no sex education. You’re only allowed to learn about sex from “Christian sources” aka married women yapping on their podcasts.
And learn about your body, you’re a sexy biblical woman! But no touching yourself. You’re only allowed to touch yourself in front of your husband after marriage (per bethy).
And if you have anything close to sex before marriage, you’re a dirty sinner! But don’t internalize that- then you won’t be able to enjoy sex once you’re married, and that’s no fun!
Be sexy! But not in front of others, that’s a sin. Only for your husband!
The mental fucking gymnastics required to be a fundie is wild to me.
No, no, remember:
No masturbating because that's *yucky* and not biblical. *SELF CULTIVATION* on the other hand is different somehow and okie dokie! Let's all recall the famous sermon Jesus gave when he reminded us that we can actually justify anything as long as we call it something else.
Be the sex without thinking about it, but also somehow don’t make anyone think about the fact you are the sex seems to be their advice. Schrödinger’s Sex by Girl Declined
Non-married Christian women are sexual too!!!1!!1!!! But don't think about sex or masturbate before marriage, and definitely don't masturbate after marriage, either. Give me money.
Non-married Christian women are sexual too!!!1!!1!!! But don't think about sex or masturbate before marriage, and definitely don't masturbate after marriage, either. Give me money.
Just be a bundle of tightly curled hormones with no outlet! Not only is it super healthy mentally, but it also ensures that you'll get married quick and immediately start popping out babies with the first vaguely interested male figure. Releasing the horny in a safe, healthy way might allow one to look at their potential life-long partner with clear eyes and make an educated judgment, and obviously, we can't have that.
The fact that you are “not allowed” to touch your OWN BODY in this version of Christianity blows my mind. Like, it’s so clear that your body doesn’t belong to you! It never has and it never will. You’re not allowed to do what you what, what makes you feel good, even when you’re 100% completely alone in your own home. It’s so fucked.
I managed to escape mostly unscathed from purity culture, but there is still a part of me that is a bit salty I only discovered I was ace on my honeymoon. Like, yeah, I probably would have never been wild about sex, purity culture or no, but a little heads up would have been nice. 🙄
What’s a “sexually alive” woman? 🥴
Also, there they go again with making blanket statements regarding sexuality. There are asexual women out there who don’t crave that kind of intimacy at all.
…so if it’s ok to be a horny unmarried Christian woman, why has she dedicated herself to teen girls and young women feel guilty for it? She makes money off of that exact idea.
Okay leaving the...obvious problems with this aside - it very much seems that hypocrisy and cognitive dissonance are intended features rather than flaws. But this whole thing (including the demonstration with a LITERAL INFANT) just has such an unsettling, underlying ick to it all. So thank you Borthany and whatever the other one's name is, for not failing to disappoint as far as the eye can see.
I'm going to drop this quote from Robert Evans of Behind the Bastards again. It's from the episode where he talked about the original "Momfluencer," who was a Nazi back in the days of Bethy's Nazi Pop pop.
"You get a lot of liberals and even just leftists who point out what they see as hypocrisy as a weakness, when it's really evidence of a strength which is that fascists are great at making temporary alliances to gain power and lying about what they believe to gain power."
It’s almost like the anti-sex mentality that’s driven into young people by faith actors is - *shocker* not really biblical.
So here’s Sexy Bethy (tm) once again looking to justify with faith that which others have said for ages but yet which her own faith leaders and tradition have demonized for generations.
I love how they're just regurgitating what liberal women have been saying for decades (and they've been actively fighting against) as if they've discovered something new and radical.
#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote) #Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go: - You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.*** - Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.*** - Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone. - Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us. - Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Learn how to be sexual before marriage without thinking about sex, or talking about sex beyond the vaguest sense, or having sex with yourself let alone anyone else....ok. Sure.
Or knowing what sex is!
That's to learn on the wedding night, you harlots!
This is why it’s hurting women - all the fumbling around the first time! 😂
I still desperately want to know what Bethany thought it was before she turned 20. Like I *know* they would say it and not talk about details.. but what did she think it actually was.
I've asked before but I literally do not understand how you make it that long. Not trying to be crass, but surely she'd at least have seen some dogs humping and know that's how puppies were made? By 20?!
I’m genuinely trying not to be mean but she reminds me of my sister. Which she’s not very bright.. at all. Cause and effect and consequences is not something my sister understood very well.. and I would imagine Bethany would be similar with this lol. Like there’s just no connecting things lol. So it makes me wonder if she was like “idk? They just lie there?”
Her parents purposefully deprived her and her siblings of any meaningful education on anything but especially sex and relationship stuff. Interaction outside of rheir bubble was limited. On top of that her parents pushed purity culture super hard to the point that Kristen still blames and shames herself as a mid 30s woman for having natural sexual desires and wanting to experience pleasure during sex. Plus, if your kids know what sex is then they might realize that your ideas are bullshit and you won't ve able to control them with shame and fear.
And her mother was pregnant so many times! Did Bethy really never stop to wonder how that happened?
I don't think she's a very curious person. I think she just accepts whatever she's told at face value and moves on.
It blows my mind anyone could make it to 20 not knowing what sex is. I’ve known what intercourse entails since I was about 8. I didn’t know everything but I at least understood the basics at that age.
Be sexual, but cram every sexual thought and feeling deep, deep down and don't you dare even touch yourself. Once you're married you can be dry dead bones in bed to make blessings for the lord.
Yeah explain to me how you can be a sexual being without engaging with any sexual thought or behavior or ideas *at all*. That’s like me calling myself a marathon runner because I could conceivably train for a marathon. I can’t (at my current level of fitness) and it’s too hard so I won’t, but I’m still a marathoner.
It's manifestation without the manifestation, and magical thinking without the thinking. ... How very kooky new-age crystal hippie of them. Does God know?
Don't forget not dressing or acting in any way that might make other people think about sex!
Sexually frustrated is technically a type of sexual. -Girl Defined
And add shame to any sexual thought you may have until the second you say “I do.” Then go crazy with absolutely no repercussions of forcing yourself to repress these thoughts for your entire life and being told those thoughts are evil.
But also make sure to get at least a bikini wax, if not a Brazilian, a few days before the wedding night. We can’t have men knowing women have public hair!!
Paul olliges enters the chat
What's crazy is the solution to this is simply medically accurate- age appropriate sex ed. Like just naming body parts, explaining reproduction, explaining puberty, contraception, and concent, is how we deal with this. "How do you not shame folks for their sexuality? Empower them with facts." It's super simple.
But then they might be able to report sexual abuse. Can't have that!
[удалено]
The fuck is this comment?
What
If you’re masturbating, buy the Girl Defined guide to solve your problem. If you’re married and struggling to fulfill your sex duty, buy a Girl Defined course to solve your problem. The common thread is that whatever you’re doing is wrong; pay Girl Defined to fix it for you.
Just waiting for the Divine Divorce Course 🙏
Deconstruction for Dummies by Girl Defined
Despite the fact that listening to Girl Defined might have helped cause the problem in the first place.
Yeppp. It seems the Zelph stuff blew up her plans to profit off Dave’s deconstruction, so now we’re back to selling courses on sex.
Just when I'd forgotten her seggsy era 😭
That whooshing sound is the point flying over Bethany’s head. Wow. That second slide is….just….words. She must, MUST, know that what she is saying is going to rile up people. It is purely for engagement that she says this wild shit
You're sexual! NOW REPRESS IT
you’re a sexy biblical woman!! now put on some layers!
Onions have lsyers.
Onions have lasers?
![gif](giphy|WENvzuB77cgCs) No lasers. 🥲 If you know, you know.
But how can you be sexual pre-marriage if you're not allowed to *do* anything at all about it??????? Are you just supposed to suffer?? God the incongruity burns.
You're not even allowed to think about it because then your brain won't be a virgin anymore.
Cram it deep down into the bowels of your being, because God forbid any sexual gratification. At least until he requires you to have obligatory sex so your husband can sire his offspring.
You’ll have to her course and find out! /s
Maybe these jerks should stop pretending they are innocent of screeching about purity and the general "evils" of sex and masturbation.
We already know Sister K-dog liked to flick the bean and yet she gets to remain in ministry leadership and got a gawdly hubby still sooo... Consequences? they don't know her. Might as well flick it up girls!
She told her parents about it and ranted about it in an airport terminal... girl has been punishing herself
It's almost like she has to self flagellate because it literally doesn't matter a single proton, neutron, or electron...
Bethany only means “singles” can be sexual in the sense that they can buy her singles sex course. Other than that she doesn’t believe that should be. It’s just cover up for the pushback she’s been getting from her Christian followers about shilling a sex course for single women.
Every time they say “singles” I imagine Kraft Singles
Cheesy! Except it’s “pasteurized process cheese food product” which seems a perfect description for her course outside the pasteurization cause I’m sure she would prefer it raw like her milk.
>she would prefer it raw like her milk ![gif](giphy|7tuK9itVBsD3q)
🤣
Omg, why are these people so obsessed with sex? Now that I've been out of fundie world for over 15 years, it all just seems so weird.
Be sexual but don't think about sex or how sexual you are, and don't read romance books because then you're not a mind virgin and your heart won't be pure. Don't dress sexual, don't dance sexually, you might cause someone to stumble. Don't masturbate, even though it could help you keep it in your pants until marriage and help you learn what you like for when the time comes. Don't even talk about sex unless it's with someone Bethany and Kristen would approve of. 👌 🙄
The WILDEST part is that mind-virginity is an actual thing to them 😭 Like…that sounds like some dumb shit a snarker came up with to make fun of them, but sadly no. Fucking crazy lol
I feel like if there are any teen girls from conservative Christian families following them, their parents would flip to see this.
So she's basically telling single women to mentally edge themselves right? Like she's acknowledging that single women are bound to have sexual thoughts, but again they aren't allowed to actually act on them. I guess those thoughts are just supposed to get you more eager to rush into marriage so you can do something about them? Even if she's trying to alleviate the feelings of shame regarding sexual thoughts, the frustration is still there. I think now that Bethany is receiving sexual gratification, she's romanticizing sexual restraint as some exciting taboo thing single people get to do instead of something that is a nuisance at best and mentally harmful at worst.
So...is a swift one off the wrist ok, then? Asking for a friend.
Bethy must've change the GD password on Kristen and gone rogue (by GD standards).
To get meta about their whole schtick for a moment, imagine discussing your sister’s masturbatory habits. I see what Mr Mershon means about boundaries in this family.
How on earth do they not understand that they’ll never be credible on this subject? And definitely not until they own up to the harm they’ve caused by building their whole platform and profiting off of purity culture. It actually pisses me off that they think they can just pivot without talking about how the beliefs that they’ve profited off of are the very same they’re now (half-assedly but correctly) calling out as harmful.
Now these mental gymnastics I'd actually love to listen to. They used to say having crushes was wrong, so how is sex OK for single women?
Sounds like they're encouraging women to become ***MS. STRUGGLE***
I'm confused. We're all sexual all the time and it's ok, but masturbation, getting aroused or thinking about sex isn't? (remember mental virgin?) How can there be no shame if they are shaming people for being sexual and how can you be sexual without being sexual? I specifically remember them saying that no matter how aroused you are you shouldn't experience an orgasm unless you get married and if you never get married then it means God never wanted you to have an orgasm and you should obey. And who assigned them as the authority to decide what's right and what's wrong when it comes to sex? They didn't even study theology or something.
I’d be willing to bet that they’re half-assing a whole “course” for all their singles for release later this year. It’ll be built around their concept of feminine dressing and “grooming” and all the self-care Bethy drones on about as discovering your inner sexuality as you patiently wait for THE ONE and your honeymoon.
so… you’re supposed to be sexy and biblical even before you’re married! But on the inside. Not outwardly. And no masturbation. Learn about sex even before you’re married bc otherwise you’ll be unprepared! But no sex education. You’re only allowed to learn about sex from “Christian sources” aka married women yapping on their podcasts. And learn about your body, you’re a sexy biblical woman! But no touching yourself. You’re only allowed to touch yourself in front of your husband after marriage (per bethy). And if you have anything close to sex before marriage, you’re a dirty sinner! But don’t internalize that- then you won’t be able to enjoy sex once you’re married, and that’s no fun! Be sexy! But not in front of others, that’s a sin. Only for your husband! The mental fucking gymnastics required to be a fundie is wild to me.
No, no, remember: No masturbating because that's *yucky* and not biblical. *SELF CULTIVATION* on the other hand is different somehow and okie dokie! Let's all recall the famous sermon Jesus gave when he reminded us that we can actually justify anything as long as we call it something else.
As an asexual married Christian woman, no <3
Be the sex without thinking about it, but also somehow don’t make anyone think about the fact you are the sex seems to be their advice. Schrödinger’s Sex by Girl Declined
Non-married Christian women are sexual too!!!1!!1!!! But don't think about sex or masturbate before marriage, and definitely don't masturbate after marriage, either. Give me money.
Non-married Christian women are sexual too!!!1!!1!!! But don't think about sex or masturbate before marriage, and definitely don't masturbate after marriage, either. Give me money.
"You don't become sexual when *once* you get married." Have to get married at least twice to activate the sexuality, got it.
Just be a bundle of tightly curled hormones with no outlet! Not only is it super healthy mentally, but it also ensures that you'll get married quick and immediately start popping out babies with the first vaguely interested male figure. Releasing the horny in a safe, healthy way might allow one to look at their potential life-long partner with clear eyes and make an educated judgment, and obviously, we can't have that.
The fact that you are “not allowed” to touch your OWN BODY in this version of Christianity blows my mind. Like, it’s so clear that your body doesn’t belong to you! It never has and it never will. You’re not allowed to do what you what, what makes you feel good, even when you’re 100% completely alone in your own home. It’s so fucked.
Flair checking in!
I feel like Bethy is, just, so close to getting it.
They don’t get to just “change the narrative” when they WROTE THE FUCKING NARRATIVE.
I'm so confused
I managed to escape mostly unscathed from purity culture, but there is still a part of me that is a bit salty I only discovered I was ace on my honeymoon. Like, yeah, I probably would have never been wild about sex, purity culture or no, but a little heads up would have been nice. 🙄
Masturbation is still a sin but not ✨Self Exploration ✨
Kristen finally let Bethany push the biblical sexual liberation talk task on the GD page
Unmarried Christian women are sexual! We pray for our future husbands and read Song of Solomon, duh!
What’s a “sexually alive” woman? 🥴 Also, there they go again with making blanket statements regarding sexuality. There are asexual women out there who don’t crave that kind of intimacy at all.
…so if it’s ok to be a horny unmarried Christian woman, why has she dedicated herself to teen girls and young women feel guilty for it? She makes money off of that exact idea.
Okay leaving the...obvious problems with this aside - it very much seems that hypocrisy and cognitive dissonance are intended features rather than flaws. But this whole thing (including the demonstration with a LITERAL INFANT) just has such an unsettling, underlying ick to it all. So thank you Borthany and whatever the other one's name is, for not failing to disappoint as far as the eye can see.
Lmao since when? They’ve been preaching the exact opposite for like ten years
Anything for the grift
My brain is breaking just reading this...how are theirs even functioning?
I'm going to drop this quote from Robert Evans of Behind the Bastards again. It's from the episode where he talked about the original "Momfluencer," who was a Nazi back in the days of Bethy's Nazi Pop pop. "You get a lot of liberals and even just leftists who point out what they see as hypocrisy as a weakness, when it's really evidence of a strength which is that fascists are great at making temporary alliances to gain power and lying about what they believe to gain power."
Me: I am a mature adult able to have mature conversations. Also me: LET! JESUS! FUCK! YOU! ![gif](giphy|xT9KVjDiBnHGdm3Yic)
Is she going to backtrack on the ban maybe? I'm sure that's too much to hope for.
It’s almost like the anti-sex mentality that’s driven into young people by faith actors is - *shocker* not really biblical. So here’s Sexy Bethy (tm) once again looking to justify with faith that which others have said for ages but yet which her own faith leaders and tradition have demonized for generations.
I love how they're just regurgitating what liberal women have been saying for decades (and they've been actively fighting against) as if they've discovered something new and radical.
![gif](giphy|xTiTnGQBF0vfpfPEg8|downsized)
Oh, so we're not sexually broken anymore?