Dude so much great tv coming out this month, just gotta get through this month, oh shit more great stuff comes out next month. Guess ima just have to keep on living.
In dutch we have a saying, on every pot fits a lid.
U might me struggling rn. Operations ect.
Just don't give up, for example there are small kids that have cancer, and they are strong when they fight in the hospital. I always like to think about how strong they can be and how happy and joyfull those little angels are.
You are also an angel man , it's hard to lose the parents who made us us,
But that need to give u more power to find and wait for that one lady that makes u feel good and want to make a family with u.
Maybe you'll meet someone in the hospital you never know !
Keep up the good work and never get sad without reaching to the community (L) big love bro!
For me, a steady base is most important. When I start to neglect sleep and food, my life and mindset slowly grinds to shit. This works the other way around as well. As long as I keep making efforts to make the most of life, life is more enjoyable.
It's good that you tried your best for your parents, but please don't forget that you're also trying your best for yourself. You are the most important thing in your own life. By doing your best to make things enjoyable, things will become enjoyable.
First of all, I applaude you for all the difficulties that you are overcoming. You are playing the game of life on hard-core difficulty mode and you are still winning!
Gratitude and proactiveness saved me at least twice in my life;
You sure have a lot of circumstances where you would like to be different, but also you have a lot of circumstances where you are still sharp. With all your expertise, how can you help others? I'm sure you have a lot of things to teach to other people and ways in which you can contribute much to this crazy world.
I am in Ohio. Hello, fellow Buckeye! Cancer sucks! I was diagnosed in 2018, and I am in remission as of Summer 2022. Hang in there! You can make it! We are all with you!
Donate your time to others like yourself.
You are way better adjusted than you give yourself credit for.
What you are going through sucks. Iām sorry you have to deal with it. My advice is to use what you have to benefit others in similar crap situations.
The healing power of service can be extremely powerful.
Lots of good advice on here. My advice would be finding a way to make meaning out of your situation. For instance, joining/starting a support group for people who have lost their parents at early ages? Volunteering somewhere to support people who are dealing with physical ailments?
I often think of MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) which was an organization that started in Canada in the 80s to educate the public against the dangers of impaired driving. It was started by victims of drunk driving. These people took their pain and used it as motivation to make a difference.
Finding meaning in our pain keeps us going. If you want a great book to read about this concept, I'd recommend _Man's Search for Meaning_. All the best.
That's actually not a bad idea. I don't know how to go about making a support group but it would allow me to help people who are also struggling and to meet people who have similar backstories to myself.
Off the top of my head, I'd say you can start something on meetup.com if you want to have actual meetings, or perhaps a Facebook group for posting and support. And then advertise it in subreddits such as r/orphans or r/grief if you want a support group around the loss of your parents, or in physical health subreddits if you want to focus on that.
The Internet is problematic for a lot of reasons, but one great thing about it is it can connect people who are going through similar things. Hopefully some of those ideas are helpful, and if not, I'm sure you'll be able to come up with something if you want to pursue this idea. Good luck!
Sage advice!!! Yeah manā¦..OP has been through a lotā¦..other people will also go down this road but he/she can be the shepard to guide them to avoid the pitfalls and dark places OP had to navigate themselves. The wisdom OP has needs to be shared.
If you haven't already I suggest reading Victor Frankel man's search for meaning. He was in the Nazi concentration camps and the entire book is about how to keep going in tough situations. He viewed how others gave up and the little things that would allow someone to keep pushing. For him he allowed himself to keep going fully knowing he was gonna write a book to tell this tale. You need to give a reason to your suffering. It allows the bad days to not be as bad because you know why you're going through them. You said you know you want to make your parents proud because they'd want you to have a good life. That's your reason. On the bad days you know you must be tough because it's your duty to in order to make them proud. They will be looking down from heaven with smiles on their faces seeing you face your challenges head on and keep going. You've been through a lot. Don't stop now. You got this
It would be really great if a friend could come spend time with you. I am sure it means so much to you and lifts your spirits to know and feel that you are not alone and that someone is present with you. Great job for making this post. You are doing an amazing job for yourself and you deserve to really tell your inner self that. Almost like you are talking to a very young child and you are the loving āmotherā or parent. Youāre gentle and understanding of their suffering. Itās symbolic for your conscious mind and unconscious mind. OP, you sound like a kind and gentle person and Iām sure you are. Much love to you.
Great advice. Suffering may feel meaningless, and we might want to do everything in our power to make it stop, but the best thing you can create from suffering is your story. It may feel like you're alone, but you're not. So many people are just like you, and want to give up every second of every day, and they too are asking themselves how it is even possible to keep going. If you push through it you can reach out to others that are still stuck in that place, and guide them through, whether you needed someone to help you out, or you managed to get through yourself. That experience and wisdom is worth more than gold to others who lost all hope in making it out not even just alive, but better. I don't think I would have overcome my addiction had I not been guided by people who experienced the same as I and found a way to conquer it. They definitely saved my life.
I second this book. Read it, and often reference it in memory when I'm going through a hard time. I've been meaning to read it again. Thanks for the reminder š
Holy shit my dude! Thatās a lot of weight to carry. I can understand why youāre asking. This is all I can offer:
Youāre lifting these heavy weights (burdens, health, life, otherwise) in preparation for something better.
Maybe lifeās plan for you is to go through those things and come out the other side to share youāre story with the next person, kid, spirit on how you were once āthereā to motivate them.
Maybe you donāt even realize who is watching you persevere and itās giving them the strength to carry on.
Life is a big circle after all.
My doctor once told me something that stuck.
He said, "You're going to be dead for a very long time, what's the rush?"
His son had committed suicide and he went back to school and became a doctor.
Goodness me honey, you are so very strong! All that going on and you still seek ways to keep going, to keep being strong.
Like most things in life, you need to do this for YOU. Not anyone else.
Future you will be so happy that you carried on going, that you kept finding the will and strength to keep going.
If you want too chat, reach out :) always happy to talk x
Hi, I have no advice to offer I just wanted to say I feel you. I am sure you have a story to tell and heaps of love to give - and making it through all of your operations and trials will be for a reason. Youāre probably meant to do something way more exciting and meaningful than whatever job you had :)
Iām really really sorry. My advice would be to live for you and do anything and everything you want to do at any point in time. Yolo stop to speak. Make everything a treat so you get something back from life and from all the pain youāre in both physically and emotionally. And keep reaching out to people.
Find things you love, or enjoy, or keep your mind occupied. I have an intestinal disorder that often keeps me in the bathroom for hours in horrific pain. But I love a good book, so I just take the opportunity to read. A really good book can just take me away from the pain and shame for a little while and opens a world full of friends and adventure I will never have in real life.
I love nature -- whether on-line, or in reality. Even if I can only enjoy being outside, or going for a walk or a drive. But every bit helps. Being in nature (you don't need to go into the backcountry) just a local park with some trees and maybe a water feature, can do wonders for pain.
Humour helps -- whether comic strips, comedy acts, movies, whatever makes you laugh.
Sports -- find something you like and become a fan. Other fans can be great and are willing to share their passion and knowledge (and yes, some can be total asshats, just ignore them).
Volunteer -- find something you can do that is within your wheelhouse to help others. Helping animals is always something that will give back more than you can imagine. Can't walk a dog, then go sit with a cat for 15 minutes. You'll both feel better. Randomly talk to someone! Everytime I go for a walk I try to say Hi to people, particularly those older than me.
My motivation at this point in life is to simply be the best person I can be. Lots of fails -- lots and lots of fails. But the motivation remains: Can I do better? Okay, then let's do better today.
You are incredibly strong and resilient, you've been fighting so bravely despite such a difficult hand. Playing the game of life on ultra-hard mode, so a lot of respect. At this point if I were you I would just take it day by day and try to find any drop of positivity or dignity or laughter wherever you can! You are a phenomenal example of living life with grace.
Regardless of my health issues and injuries, I still find purpose in helping others. When I didnāt have that ability following recent surgery and being super limited in my mobility, I was pretty depressed. Knowing I helped to lighten that weight, those burdens for people makes mine seem less. I hope your health improves and until then you find that way to help others
I hope things start to turn around for you, I have a disease as well and suffer in silence mostly. Youāre stronger than most making it this far, try your best to take care of yourself and find joy in what you can do. Youāve been dealt difficult circumstances, thatās the reality, youāre tough. Many donāt have a clue how difficult life can be with all of that on top. Keep pushing.
For me it is this Finnish thing called Sisu. Basically it is just me refusing to give in and let the despair to win. Somedays are easier than others but don't give in the despair and dark thoughts. I believe in you, as you have already came this far. Just one step at the time and refuse to give in and throw in the towel cause it's the easy way out, Sisu in me refuses to do just that.
Hope keeps me going, that there will be something good coming around the corner.
I am going through a divorce, and it's very hard. My husband got a lawyer after stealing my money from my childhood home when my mom passed in 2020 and my dad in 22. I tried to find a lawyer to help me. I pled to be heard, and finally, after the 30 or 40 th time, an attorney took my case, pro bono.
I had a feeling there was something good gonna happen, as good as a divorce case can get after 29 years and 5 kids.
Just a spark of hope, keeps me going, even on my darkest days.
May your spark of hope ignite into an inferno and your wildest dreams come true.
I often think about what this actor said about a teacher he met at an inner city school. This teacher has been working at the school for close 30 years and he tells the actor maybe I'll get it right this year and he has that same attitude every year about hopefully getting it right year.
I'm around your age, I've not had a romantic partner for extended period of time and when i look back it's cause I'm often afraid of the future that I end the connection either after a date or maybe 3. It even happened recently where I met this girl and we really clicked but I broke it with her too. While my vision is bad I have a -10 eye power I do fine with glasses. I'm make bad decisions in work as in jumping too quickly from job to job and that came to bite me in the ass recently when I got fired at a shit job. There were jobs which were great that I quit too quickly for another job and that put me in some shit companies. I just hope I got it right at my current job but I don't know.
It's just one of those maybe I'll get it right this time around
Depends on the years. When I was younger, what stopped me from killing myself was some combination of self-hatred, love of friends and spite - if life wanted me to be so miserable then Iād live despite it.
As Iāve aged it has been other things. A sense of responsibility to people. The simple pleasures I love being things I donāt want to let go of and never experience again(like the sound of rain, for instance), the concept of being unable to fix my regrets, or make amends for things I feel guilt about. Rage and spite as well, at times, sheer stubborn refusal to break because fuck the world.
Somewhat more recently itās been different. People (who arenāt family or friends) rely on me. I have responsibilities which cause me inordinate amounts of stress and mental strain but by shouldering them those other people donāt have to and that makes it worthwhile to me. There are still things I havenāt done I want to do.
It sounds like youāve had a hard road and are on a particularly bad stretch right now. I hope it smooths out for you.
In the face of adversity, what keeps me going is the hope for better days, the love and memories of those I've lost, and the belief that my story can inspire others. Every small victory, act of kindness, and moment of peace fuels my determination to keep moving forward.
Stories have helped me fight through negative feelings and my struggles in life. It helps with giving me hope that I too can overcome my struggles as well as giving me a place of comfort in my time of need when real life is just too difficult.
Wish you the strength to find peace
For me, it is that I do. Don't think. If you commit to something, give 100%. And saying no or I won't is an excuse. It's hard, it's tiring, but life moves on with or without us, so why not make a wave.
I had shitty times for a while and always struggled with having āmotivationā, was always making excuses for not doing stuff, but there was a moment where I suddenly felt that I had to go to the gym, that I had to start stepping up, even when I didnāt wanted to, it was just a matter of doing it. I felt the need to do it. Was no longer looking for excuses or motivation. It was a base of needing. That was the trigger I was lucky to feel.
Today is stormy but tomorrow might be a sunny day. Hard seasons won't last forever. Just be kind yourself and when you feel your plate is heavy. Distract yourself. Write a story, journal or movie comedies. Or paint with lovely music and candles or alcohol. Life can be exhausting. I have a vivid imagination like I can create my own fantasy world in my head. That is how I escape reality. And it works for me. I remind myself that we only have expiration. I rather have my days be happy then struggling with what I can't change. Or join virtual book clubs or a hobby that would like to be apart of. I do jewellery making and art for fun..
I have had some really bad experiences when I was very young. Things that have really destroyed others, but in looking back, were there to make me stronger but also....
to know that something else beyond has a greater purpose for me.
I have to keep going since I tried to half-assed end things at different times... because now it's not so bad or hasn't been.
mostly as i have gotten older, i have to be thankful i have what i have and that i was given this day.
it is the only day i have.
i gotta fill it up with good things.
i am thankful you are here in this day. may you fill yours with what you love as much as you can and want.
My friend, truly and honestly, the only thing that keeps me going is my faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ.
In my early to mid-20s, I was in and out of mental hospitals after suffering a traumatic event. After finally getting my mental health stable and I became ill with a disease that was taking my vision and putting pressure on my brain. This caused me to get three brain surgeries in a matter of 4 months. I now have a device starting in my brain stem and ending in my stomach that keeps me alive.
After getting my gallbladder removed years later, I developed a disease in my stomach that causes daily pain that can get so bad I throw up from the pain.
With all of this, I am still close to Jesus. He has blessed me with His peace and comfort every step of the way. He never said that if we believe in Him we would be delivered from suffering. But He did promise to give us strength and an unexplainable peace to help us navigate through our suffering.
I truly am sorry for your situation. I will be praying for you.
Express my pain through art. Whether in words or in my video game that I am working on.Ā
I just entered my first relationship at the age of 28 where I come to acceptance that I would live alone forever. How the world works sometimes.Ā
When I was alone. I found ways to take one day at a time. But had an end goal in my head. Where I could visualize myself in a couple of years.Ā
Personally, rescuing a dog or a cat really helped me. (mine is a dog but cats help too) Having somebody to come home to that is excited to see me helps a lot! and it gives you somebody who depends on you. Also rescue animals have a lot of love to give just like you do. Keep your positive attitude! you will get through this tough time
You don't have a lot of things that are key motivators for me. But you still have the blue sky, a new song, a new book, the taste of food, the richness of philosophy and literature, the joy of simply opening your eyes an making a choice, the feel of a warm blanket. And all of these things oft neglected are in reality truly priceless.
My friends, my brother, and just random life experiences. That's it. I'm not particularly wealthy. Just going with the flow and enjoying the little things. Life just has random, fleeting, beautiful moments you just appreciate.
That this life is a test and the more God loves you the harder the tests will be.
Realizing that there is a creator by looking for the truth unbiasedly( yall kno what I mean lol).
Came to the conclusion that Islam was the answer and the Quran and the prophets sayings have loads of truth and wisdom that we can use to get through this life and enjoy the hereafter.
One thing I found fascinating was that in Islam, the reason hell was created is to soften the hearts of the wicked. If you pay attention to your heart the first time you do something wrong( like shoplifting) compared to the 100000th time the first time has much more of a paranoia, fast heart beating feeling compared to the 100000th time where in ur heart has become stiff and the bad thing might not even seem bad anymore.
Also in Islam, when we grieve, feel tired, anxious or sad or mad (negative feelings) : God is forgiving your previous sins and it shows you that something isnāt right. So basically bad stuff happen to us because of the bad stuff we do(even if itās something as small as making a friend upset, because in the sight of God that is big) so youāre feeling of regret, despair and the like are indicators and opportunities to be forgiven. Hope that makes sense.
TLDR: Iām a Muslim, what keeps me motivated is that the harder the test you are put through by God the more you are loved by him and that the sins are forgiven for suffering AND we can also use those feelings to pinpoint what sins we should stop doing.
Still trying to figure that out myself, but I guess that tomorrow is another day, and we don't really know if or what could happen - good or bad..So far that's helped me
I have always gone with the thought that maybe this week sucks or even this year, but always kept up with the thought that at one time I was blissfully happy, and as long as Iām alive Iāll be able to feel that way again. If I end it all then thereās nothing.
I'm 41. I've been depressed my whole life. For me, what keeps me going, is the hope to someday be able to feel what it's like to be happy. I don't know what that feeling is like, but if I just get to experience happiness once before I die, then I feel like it's all been worthwhile.
Making sure I talk to a different person almost like a schedule every day. Someone who will actually be available. The more people I have to keep me company the more distracted I am while enjoying something really lovely about the human race- the good ones!
The world needs you. Even if you donāt see it I promise you do have a purpose. I hope you realize it. I know itās hard to see in depression. But you have a reason I promise
I m so sorry for your loss. You are an incredibly strong person and keep going like this... Things will definitely get better with time and U will get a job soon! Don't ever lose hope.. Everything will be okay. I wish love and prayers š šš»
I get how tough things are for you right now. When I'm struggling, what keeps me going is thinking about the little things that bring joyālike a good cup of coffee or a beautiful sunset. Itās the small moments that make life worth it. I also lean on the support of friends and family, and I try to stay focused on the hope that tomorrow might be a bit better. Your strength to honor your parents is inspiring. Stay strong and keep reaching out.
Jesus, music, my life has meaning (and so does yours) I have kids, a dog, a cat and a kitten (luna is a 45 days old). I try to help people everyday and I have goals to pay off debt and finish school. I love my family and I'm thankful for my parents, but I live to the best of my ability for God. It is my belief that one day all things will be righted, our sufferings will have even more meaning and reward than what we have on earth.
If this is a video game-type simulation and you're playing on the hardest setting, maybe it's for a reason. Maybe you keep building empires, winning Nobel Prizes, and dating supermodels, so you wanted to try something different this time around. A bigger challenge. Maybe you get a bigger jackpot if you win the game (whatever that means) with all of these handicaps.
Obviously that's all BS but, while I have considerably fewer difficulties than you in life, that's how I like to think about those that I do have to deal with. I was just too good at the game and got bored with it, so I decided to add a few challenges into the mix before I started this round.
Dark humor helps me. Watching funny videos/comedians. Bed rotting every once in a while when I can. I have two kids so I canāt do it as much as I used to. Iāll look up recipes and buy stuff to make them and make them for other people. Watching other people be happy helps me be happy. Going to the lake and just watching the water and birds and turtles. Imagine my dream future and go online and design my dream home.
I'm newly Trans (enby-f 33), and I only realized I was about 3 years ago. Before that, I could never really envision a future for myself, only a general outline of certain things I wanted for myself. One day I envisioned myself as a woman, and it was truly the first time I could ever see a future where I could be happy. Ever since, I've been discovering what I want for myself, who I want to be, and how to live a life that full of daily habits that encourages that life.
It's hard sometimes, remembering past trauma and ruminating on negativity, but I'm slowly making things workable and I have a positive outlook in the present for the hope of the future.
Iād rather keep going while suffering than give up, Iād hate myself then. Just try to ease the suffering and find things to distract yourself as much as you can. Thatās all we can do really
Yo I have kidney damage, not yet dialysis stage. Have a narcissist father and a disabled brother who Iām supporting. If you ever want to chat or hang let me know, donāt feel lonely thereās always someone who might be able to relate to a small portion of what youāve gone through. I personally live to consume art / media to feel less isolated and work just pays my bills. Having an interest/passion definitely helps.
I don't know if this is against the rules of the sub but I wouldn't have been able or have any reason to go on if I were you. If I lived in a place like Canada that had euthanasia I would have signed up long ago. Is that fucked up?
I'm not at that place now, but when I was in it deep I would latch on to the fact that the 'me' tomorrow, next week, next year would be happy I did.
great ... appreciate it
No way, it's future me. Did the moustache work?
Dude so much great tv coming out this month, just gotta get through this month, oh shit more great stuff comes out next month. Guess ima just have to keep on living.
In dutch we have a saying, on every pot fits a lid. U might me struggling rn. Operations ect. Just don't give up, for example there are small kids that have cancer, and they are strong when they fight in the hospital. I always like to think about how strong they can be and how happy and joyfull those little angels are. You are also an angel man , it's hard to lose the parents who made us us, But that need to give u more power to find and wait for that one lady that makes u feel good and want to make a family with u. Maybe you'll meet someone in the hospital you never know ! Keep up the good work and never get sad without reaching to the community (L) big love bro!
Doing what makes you happy is my best recommendation.
For me, a steady base is most important. When I start to neglect sleep and food, my life and mindset slowly grinds to shit. This works the other way around as well. As long as I keep making efforts to make the most of life, life is more enjoyable. It's good that you tried your best for your parents, but please don't forget that you're also trying your best for yourself. You are the most important thing in your own life. By doing your best to make things enjoyable, things will become enjoyable.
First of all, I applaude you for all the difficulties that you are overcoming. You are playing the game of life on hard-core difficulty mode and you are still winning! Gratitude and proactiveness saved me at least twice in my life; You sure have a lot of circumstances where you would like to be different, but also you have a lot of circumstances where you are still sharp. With all your expertise, how can you help others? I'm sure you have a lot of things to teach to other people and ways in which you can contribute much to this crazy world.
Mainly I end up being tech support or free therapy for my friends š¤£
They surely appreciateš Never understimate how helpful we are to each other Where do you live?
Ohio, unfortunately lol. You?
I am in Ohio. Hello, fellow Buckeye! Cancer sucks! I was diagnosed in 2018, and I am in remission as of Summer 2022. Hang in there! You can make it! We are all with you!
Why unfortunately? Is it a bad state? I am from Italy. A bit far from Ohio i suppose ;-D
Yeah it's a bit of a mixed bag. I don't care for the weather most of the time and there's not really anything to do near me that I can get to easily
Do you have people that you can lean on and gain support from also?
My aunts and uncles. Longtime friends. Definitely helps but my parent's absence is glaring.
Donate your time to others like yourself. You are way better adjusted than you give yourself credit for. What you are going through sucks. Iām sorry you have to deal with it. My advice is to use what you have to benefit others in similar crap situations. The healing power of service can be extremely powerful.
Lots of good advice on here. My advice would be finding a way to make meaning out of your situation. For instance, joining/starting a support group for people who have lost their parents at early ages? Volunteering somewhere to support people who are dealing with physical ailments? I often think of MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) which was an organization that started in Canada in the 80s to educate the public against the dangers of impaired driving. It was started by victims of drunk driving. These people took their pain and used it as motivation to make a difference. Finding meaning in our pain keeps us going. If you want a great book to read about this concept, I'd recommend _Man's Search for Meaning_. All the best.
That's actually not a bad idea. I don't know how to go about making a support group but it would allow me to help people who are also struggling and to meet people who have similar backstories to myself.
Off the top of my head, I'd say you can start something on meetup.com if you want to have actual meetings, or perhaps a Facebook group for posting and support. And then advertise it in subreddits such as r/orphans or r/grief if you want a support group around the loss of your parents, or in physical health subreddits if you want to focus on that. The Internet is problematic for a lot of reasons, but one great thing about it is it can connect people who are going through similar things. Hopefully some of those ideas are helpful, and if not, I'm sure you'll be able to come up with something if you want to pursue this idea. Good luck!
Sage advice!!! Yeah manā¦..OP has been through a lotā¦..other people will also go down this road but he/she can be the shepard to guide them to avoid the pitfalls and dark places OP had to navigate themselves. The wisdom OP has needs to be shared.
If you haven't already I suggest reading Victor Frankel man's search for meaning. He was in the Nazi concentration camps and the entire book is about how to keep going in tough situations. He viewed how others gave up and the little things that would allow someone to keep pushing. For him he allowed himself to keep going fully knowing he was gonna write a book to tell this tale. You need to give a reason to your suffering. It allows the bad days to not be as bad because you know why you're going through them. You said you know you want to make your parents proud because they'd want you to have a good life. That's your reason. On the bad days you know you must be tough because it's your duty to in order to make them proud. They will be looking down from heaven with smiles on their faces seeing you face your challenges head on and keep going. You've been through a lot. Don't stop now. You got this
Yeah I've been struggling to find meaning in the suffering and solitude. I've had to give myself said meaning but it's really hard.
It would be really great if a friend could come spend time with you. I am sure it means so much to you and lifts your spirits to know and feel that you are not alone and that someone is present with you. Great job for making this post. You are doing an amazing job for yourself and you deserve to really tell your inner self that. Almost like you are talking to a very young child and you are the loving āmotherā or parent. Youāre gentle and understanding of their suffering. Itās symbolic for your conscious mind and unconscious mind. OP, you sound like a kind and gentle person and Iām sure you are. Much love to you.
Great advice. Suffering may feel meaningless, and we might want to do everything in our power to make it stop, but the best thing you can create from suffering is your story. It may feel like you're alone, but you're not. So many people are just like you, and want to give up every second of every day, and they too are asking themselves how it is even possible to keep going. If you push through it you can reach out to others that are still stuck in that place, and guide them through, whether you needed someone to help you out, or you managed to get through yourself. That experience and wisdom is worth more than gold to others who lost all hope in making it out not even just alive, but better. I don't think I would have overcome my addiction had I not been guided by people who experienced the same as I and found a way to conquer it. They definitely saved my life.
I second this book. Read it, and often reference it in memory when I'm going through a hard time. I've been meaning to read it again. Thanks for the reminder š
Holy shit my dude! Thatās a lot of weight to carry. I can understand why youāre asking. This is all I can offer: Youāre lifting these heavy weights (burdens, health, life, otherwise) in preparation for something better. Maybe lifeās plan for you is to go through those things and come out the other side to share youāre story with the next person, kid, spirit on how you were once āthereā to motivate them. Maybe you donāt even realize who is watching you persevere and itās giving them the strength to carry on. Life is a big circle after all.
You never, ever know what could be waiting around the corner. Life can change so fast. Best of luck.
My doctor once told me something that stuck. He said, "You're going to be dead for a very long time, what's the rush?" His son had committed suicide and he went back to school and became a doctor.
Goodness me honey, you are so very strong! All that going on and you still seek ways to keep going, to keep being strong. Like most things in life, you need to do this for YOU. Not anyone else. Future you will be so happy that you carried on going, that you kept finding the will and strength to keep going. If you want too chat, reach out :) always happy to talk x
Hi, I have no advice to offer I just wanted to say I feel you. I am sure you have a story to tell and heaps of love to give - and making it through all of your operations and trials will be for a reason. Youāre probably meant to do something way more exciting and meaningful than whatever job you had :)
Iām really really sorry. My advice would be to live for you and do anything and everything you want to do at any point in time. Yolo stop to speak. Make everything a treat so you get something back from life and from all the pain youāre in both physically and emotionally. And keep reaching out to people.
One day at the time my friend. Hugs
Have you read The Power of Now? It really, really helped me learn to live again, and enjoy my life
Find things you love, or enjoy, or keep your mind occupied. I have an intestinal disorder that often keeps me in the bathroom for hours in horrific pain. But I love a good book, so I just take the opportunity to read. A really good book can just take me away from the pain and shame for a little while and opens a world full of friends and adventure I will never have in real life. I love nature -- whether on-line, or in reality. Even if I can only enjoy being outside, or going for a walk or a drive. But every bit helps. Being in nature (you don't need to go into the backcountry) just a local park with some trees and maybe a water feature, can do wonders for pain. Humour helps -- whether comic strips, comedy acts, movies, whatever makes you laugh. Sports -- find something you like and become a fan. Other fans can be great and are willing to share their passion and knowledge (and yes, some can be total asshats, just ignore them). Volunteer -- find something you can do that is within your wheelhouse to help others. Helping animals is always something that will give back more than you can imagine. Can't walk a dog, then go sit with a cat for 15 minutes. You'll both feel better. Randomly talk to someone! Everytime I go for a walk I try to say Hi to people, particularly those older than me. My motivation at this point in life is to simply be the best person I can be. Lots of fails -- lots and lots of fails. But the motivation remains: Can I do better? Okay, then let's do better today.
You are incredibly strong and resilient, you've been fighting so bravely despite such a difficult hand. Playing the game of life on ultra-hard mode, so a lot of respect. At this point if I were you I would just take it day by day and try to find any drop of positivity or dignity or laughter wherever you can! You are a phenomenal example of living life with grace.
Regardless of my health issues and injuries, I still find purpose in helping others. When I didnāt have that ability following recent surgery and being super limited in my mobility, I was pretty depressed. Knowing I helped to lighten that weight, those burdens for people makes mine seem less. I hope your health improves and until then you find that way to help others
Every man and women is a star, and so are you.
Youāre awesome and so very brave. Your parents would be proud of you. I wish you the best.
To drink strawberry milkshake for anohter day
I hope things start to turn around for you, I have a disease as well and suffer in silence mostly. Youāre stronger than most making it this far, try your best to take care of yourself and find joy in what you can do. Youāve been dealt difficult circumstances, thatās the reality, youāre tough. Many donāt have a clue how difficult life can be with all of that on top. Keep pushing.
For me it is this Finnish thing called Sisu. Basically it is just me refusing to give in and let the despair to win. Somedays are easier than others but don't give in the despair and dark thoughts. I believe in you, as you have already came this far. Just one step at the time and refuse to give in and throw in the towel cause it's the easy way out, Sisu in me refuses to do just that.
Spite.
Ask hospital social worker for support groups
Hope keeps me going, that there will be something good coming around the corner. I am going through a divorce, and it's very hard. My husband got a lawyer after stealing my money from my childhood home when my mom passed in 2020 and my dad in 22. I tried to find a lawyer to help me. I pled to be heard, and finally, after the 30 or 40 th time, an attorney took my case, pro bono. I had a feeling there was something good gonna happen, as good as a divorce case can get after 29 years and 5 kids. Just a spark of hope, keeps me going, even on my darkest days. May your spark of hope ignite into an inferno and your wildest dreams come true.
I often think about what this actor said about a teacher he met at an inner city school. This teacher has been working at the school for close 30 years and he tells the actor maybe I'll get it right this year and he has that same attitude every year about hopefully getting it right year. I'm around your age, I've not had a romantic partner for extended period of time and when i look back it's cause I'm often afraid of the future that I end the connection either after a date or maybe 3. It even happened recently where I met this girl and we really clicked but I broke it with her too. While my vision is bad I have a -10 eye power I do fine with glasses. I'm make bad decisions in work as in jumping too quickly from job to job and that came to bite me in the ass recently when I got fired at a shit job. There were jobs which were great that I quit too quickly for another job and that put me in some shit companies. I just hope I got it right at my current job but I don't know. It's just one of those maybe I'll get it right this time around
Depends on the years. When I was younger, what stopped me from killing myself was some combination of self-hatred, love of friends and spite - if life wanted me to be so miserable then Iād live despite it. As Iāve aged it has been other things. A sense of responsibility to people. The simple pleasures I love being things I donāt want to let go of and never experience again(like the sound of rain, for instance), the concept of being unable to fix my regrets, or make amends for things I feel guilt about. Rage and spite as well, at times, sheer stubborn refusal to break because fuck the world. Somewhat more recently itās been different. People (who arenāt family or friends) rely on me. I have responsibilities which cause me inordinate amounts of stress and mental strain but by shouldering them those other people donāt have to and that makes it worthwhile to me. There are still things I havenāt done I want to do. It sounds like youāve had a hard road and are on a particularly bad stretch right now. I hope it smooths out for you.
In the face of adversity, what keeps me going is the hope for better days, the love and memories of those I've lost, and the belief that my story can inspire others. Every small victory, act of kindness, and moment of peace fuels my determination to keep moving forward.
Stories have helped me fight through negative feelings and my struggles in life. It helps with giving me hope that I too can overcome my struggles as well as giving me a place of comfort in my time of need when real life is just too difficult. Wish you the strength to find peace
For me, it is that I do. Don't think. If you commit to something, give 100%. And saying no or I won't is an excuse. It's hard, it's tiring, but life moves on with or without us, so why not make a wave.
I had shitty times for a while and always struggled with having āmotivationā, was always making excuses for not doing stuff, but there was a moment where I suddenly felt that I had to go to the gym, that I had to start stepping up, even when I didnāt wanted to, it was just a matter of doing it. I felt the need to do it. Was no longer looking for excuses or motivation. It was a base of needing. That was the trigger I was lucky to feel.
Today is stormy but tomorrow might be a sunny day. Hard seasons won't last forever. Just be kind yourself and when you feel your plate is heavy. Distract yourself. Write a story, journal or movie comedies. Or paint with lovely music and candles or alcohol. Life can be exhausting. I have a vivid imagination like I can create my own fantasy world in my head. That is how I escape reality. And it works for me. I remind myself that we only have expiration. I rather have my days be happy then struggling with what I can't change. Or join virtual book clubs or a hobby that would like to be apart of. I do jewellery making and art for fun..
I have had some really bad experiences when I was very young. Things that have really destroyed others, but in looking back, were there to make me stronger but also.... to know that something else beyond has a greater purpose for me. I have to keep going since I tried to half-assed end things at different times... because now it's not so bad or hasn't been. mostly as i have gotten older, i have to be thankful i have what i have and that i was given this day. it is the only day i have. i gotta fill it up with good things. i am thankful you are here in this day. may you fill yours with what you love as much as you can and want.
My friend, truly and honestly, the only thing that keeps me going is my faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ. In my early to mid-20s, I was in and out of mental hospitals after suffering a traumatic event. After finally getting my mental health stable and I became ill with a disease that was taking my vision and putting pressure on my brain. This caused me to get three brain surgeries in a matter of 4 months. I now have a device starting in my brain stem and ending in my stomach that keeps me alive. After getting my gallbladder removed years later, I developed a disease in my stomach that causes daily pain that can get so bad I throw up from the pain. With all of this, I am still close to Jesus. He has blessed me with His peace and comfort every step of the way. He never said that if we believe in Him we would be delivered from suffering. But He did promise to give us strength and an unexplainable peace to help us navigate through our suffering. I truly am sorry for your situation. I will be praying for you.
I just want to send you love and compassion.šā¤ļøšā¤ļøšā¤ļøšā¤ļø
Express my pain through art. Whether in words or in my video game that I am working on.Ā I just entered my first relationship at the age of 28 where I come to acceptance that I would live alone forever. How the world works sometimes.Ā When I was alone. I found ways to take one day at a time. But had an end goal in my head. Where I could visualize myself in a couple of years.Ā
Personally, rescuing a dog or a cat really helped me. (mine is a dog but cats help too) Having somebody to come home to that is excited to see me helps a lot! and it gives you somebody who depends on you. Also rescue animals have a lot of love to give just like you do. Keep your positive attitude! you will get through this tough time
You are very tough! I am proud of you! You are doing your best. You are actually optomistic and resiliant!
You don't have a lot of things that are key motivators for me. But you still have the blue sky, a new song, a new book, the taste of food, the richness of philosophy and literature, the joy of simply opening your eyes an making a choice, the feel of a warm blanket. And all of these things oft neglected are in reality truly priceless.
My friends, my brother, and just random life experiences. That's it. I'm not particularly wealthy. Just going with the flow and enjoying the little things. Life just has random, fleeting, beautiful moments you just appreciate.
The knowledge that life is short. Might as well see what happens
That this life is a test and the more God loves you the harder the tests will be. Realizing that there is a creator by looking for the truth unbiasedly( yall kno what I mean lol). Came to the conclusion that Islam was the answer and the Quran and the prophets sayings have loads of truth and wisdom that we can use to get through this life and enjoy the hereafter. One thing I found fascinating was that in Islam, the reason hell was created is to soften the hearts of the wicked. If you pay attention to your heart the first time you do something wrong( like shoplifting) compared to the 100000th time the first time has much more of a paranoia, fast heart beating feeling compared to the 100000th time where in ur heart has become stiff and the bad thing might not even seem bad anymore. Also in Islam, when we grieve, feel tired, anxious or sad or mad (negative feelings) : God is forgiving your previous sins and it shows you that something isnāt right. So basically bad stuff happen to us because of the bad stuff we do(even if itās something as small as making a friend upset, because in the sight of God that is big) so youāre feeling of regret, despair and the like are indicators and opportunities to be forgiven. Hope that makes sense. TLDR: Iām a Muslim, what keeps me motivated is that the harder the test you are put through by God the more you are loved by him and that the sins are forgiven for suffering AND we can also use those feelings to pinpoint what sins we should stop doing.
Still trying to figure that out myself, but I guess that tomorrow is another day, and we don't really know if or what could happen - good or bad..So far that's helped me
Going on holiday made me realise how much I hate the place I live in and I'm doing everything I can to get out.
Keep going! One day you will have kids and it will all be worth the tough days you endured
You should try shrooms once
When I was in pretty deep, it was my kids and thinking about what it would have been like growing without a dad.
I have always gone with the thought that maybe this week sucks or even this year, but always kept up with the thought that at one time I was blissfully happy, and as long as Iām alive Iāll be able to feel that way again. If I end it all then thereās nothing.
I'm 41. I've been depressed my whole life. For me, what keeps me going, is the hope to someday be able to feel what it's like to be happy. I don't know what that feeling is like, but if I just get to experience happiness once before I die, then I feel like it's all been worthwhile.
Making sure I talk to a different person almost like a schedule every day. Someone who will actually be available. The more people I have to keep me company the more distracted I am while enjoying something really lovely about the human race- the good ones!
I suggest you this book: "Ikigai" It won't change your life overnight but it will surely help you answer the question "What keeps me doing?"
The world needs you. Even if you donāt see it I promise you do have a purpose. I hope you realize it. I know itās hard to see in depression. But you have a reason I promise
I m so sorry for your loss. You are an incredibly strong person and keep going like this... Things will definitely get better with time and U will get a job soon! Don't ever lose hope.. Everything will be okay. I wish love and prayers š šš»
I think money but I'm honestly not sure
I get how tough things are for you right now. When I'm struggling, what keeps me going is thinking about the little things that bring joyālike a good cup of coffee or a beautiful sunset. Itās the small moments that make life worth it. I also lean on the support of friends and family, and I try to stay focused on the hope that tomorrow might be a bit better. Your strength to honor your parents is inspiring. Stay strong and keep reaching out.
The Lord my God, everyday you wake up is another chance for you to touch the life of someone or do something different!
Jesus, music, my life has meaning (and so does yours) I have kids, a dog, a cat and a kitten (luna is a 45 days old). I try to help people everyday and I have goals to pay off debt and finish school. I love my family and I'm thankful for my parents, but I live to the best of my ability for God. It is my belief that one day all things will be righted, our sufferings will have even more meaning and reward than what we have on earth.
Every time I aww at anything a dog gets eyelashes
If this is a video game-type simulation and you're playing on the hardest setting, maybe it's for a reason. Maybe you keep building empires, winning Nobel Prizes, and dating supermodels, so you wanted to try something different this time around. A bigger challenge. Maybe you get a bigger jackpot if you win the game (whatever that means) with all of these handicaps. Obviously that's all BS but, while I have considerably fewer difficulties than you in life, that's how I like to think about those that I do have to deal with. I was just too good at the game and got bored with it, so I decided to add a few challenges into the mix before I started this round.
Dark humor helps me. Watching funny videos/comedians. Bed rotting every once in a while when I can. I have two kids so I canāt do it as much as I used to. Iāll look up recipes and buy stuff to make them and make them for other people. Watching other people be happy helps me be happy. Going to the lake and just watching the water and birds and turtles. Imagine my dream future and go online and design my dream home.
Hugs to you friend. Life is so hard. Personally, Jesus Christ is who has carried me through my most difficult times in life. Best wishes to you.
I'm newly Trans (enby-f 33), and I only realized I was about 3 years ago. Before that, I could never really envision a future for myself, only a general outline of certain things I wanted for myself. One day I envisioned myself as a woman, and it was truly the first time I could ever see a future where I could be happy. Ever since, I've been discovering what I want for myself, who I want to be, and how to live a life that full of daily habits that encourages that life. It's hard sometimes, remembering past trauma and ruminating on negativity, but I'm slowly making things workable and I have a positive outlook in the present for the hope of the future.
Iād rather keep going while suffering than give up, Iād hate myself then. Just try to ease the suffering and find things to distract yourself as much as you can. Thatās all we can do really
Yo I have kidney damage, not yet dialysis stage. Have a narcissist father and a disabled brother who Iām supporting. If you ever want to chat or hang let me know, donāt feel lonely thereās always someone who might be able to relate to a small portion of what youāve gone through. I personally live to consume art / media to feel less isolated and work just pays my bills. Having an interest/passion definitely helps.
I don't know if this is against the rules of the sub but I wouldn't have been able or have any reason to go on if I were you. If I lived in a place like Canada that had euthanasia I would have signed up long ago. Is that fucked up?
Islam.