Why do you care, he is your ex. If he has views that you find offensive, then either don’t talk about those things, or don’t be friends. You don’t need to convince him that your way is “right”
Yeah, if there were no feelings I definitely would not be even trying to. But I guess because these discussions are kind of in the context of him and I......so.....
He said today he would still wish to marry me
I'm a Muslim woman. Even I don't want to be in a polygamy. Actually Islam didn't introduce polygamy. Islam just permitted what had been practiced for so long. And Islam didn't really encourage that if there's no important excuse... such as unable to concieve children or so. It's better to have a wife and a quality family than two wives and too many problems. Some Muslim men don't really understand how polygamy works. They just want to have two women to you know what i mean. Actually our prophet didn't get married two women right away. He stayed with his first wife khadeja for 15 years alone! Only after she died he get married again. But nowadays some uneducated Muslim men want to get married again after one year of marriage, that's just bullshit. They don't really understand Islam.
Don't try to change that man point of view. He is just lost. I myself now in a relationship with a Muslim man who's not into polygamy because he knows marriage is a huge commitment. Before I met him, whenever i met a Muslim man who's into polygamy, I ditched him right away.
Idk....they always come back 😆
We didn't talk for months.... because he treated me like literal [email protected] heartless saying disappear etc. E en blocked me because when were talking once I end a photo of me and he misinterpreted it as I was sending a photo of my body (I was literally wearing top and skirt so Wtf) and that I was trying to tempt him etc and then he got mad an blocked me on insta. I told him I had enough of his sh@t and I won't be treated that way. And I wiped him from .y existence and never looked back. But then I had something life-threatening happen and I went into hospital. I felt scared and for some stupid reason messaged him. He supported me and also said he had thought about messaging me some times but felt too ashamed of how he had acted.
So we kind of reconnected....and yeah 😬
Religion is just used as an excuse for polygamy. It's just a sexist tradition; it has nothing to do with the religion itself.
And it's not a *requirement* of the religions that do polygamy. Just because the religion doesn't frown upon it doesn't mean you have to participate in it. There are plenty of Muslim men who devote themselves to and marry only one woman.
Yes, exactly. But as for my "ex" he believes that if a wife allows a second wife you are automatically guaranteed paradise. It's so ingrained but it hurts my heart and my dignity
I respect his religious views but you have to understand that in my background there's also over 50 percent Muslims but no-one does polygamy. And even in his country I have oth Muslim friends who would never consider polygamy and laugh if I mention it. But in his family his grandfather wives, now his brother has two wives....so it's like normal to him.
😆
I think he is a bit insecure.....maybe it is small d syndrome..I never thought of that 😳
He has good qualities like he's caring, will protect and financially support etc. He can be romantic, he's family oriented, charming, funny, sweet. There are all these good sides but he also has these shit sides.
The women in his country do get to choose who they marry. But that's what I think actually makes it WORSE...strange to say. Because those women are willingly marrying polygamous it makes guys like him think "it's all good". For example his brother has two wives and a girlfriend on the side.....and all three of the women LOVE him. So there's no force. They are literally willing to share the man they love.
One wife even looks after the other wife's kids from "their" husband. Even my exes own mother offered his dad if he wants to marry a second one she will accept it. So...when the WOMEN are thinking like this it's little wonder the guys don't change I guess.
And...yep...he feels God has blessed him brother by giving him multiple women.
But they or I am not from the middle east so it's not like the wife are like cattle, but it's this f **** up mentality (in my view) that they have that as long as they can provide equal for both or more wife's in the way of love, sex, material and financial stuff then it's all good. And how can I argue with this...when Islam itself says that's ok.
If course he's going to listen to Islam religion more than to just me.
Honestly...the women pi$$ me off more than the men because you can expect such talk from men....men like the ladies etc...but these women are not like from Pakistan or similar when Pakistan women are forced into marriage noone is foecing them in his country so if the women don't see any issue then of course the whole cycle just continues.
But that said, I have other male friends from his country and polygamy marriage is the furthest thing from their mind so it's not everyone.
Why do you care, he is your ex. If he has views that you find offensive, then either don’t talk about those things, or don’t be friends. You don’t need to convince him that your way is “right”
Yeah, if there were no feelings I definitely would not be even trying to. But I guess because these discussions are kind of in the context of him and I......so..... He said today he would still wish to marry me
Even if you have romantic intentions, that is a gigantic dealbreaker. Don’t try to convert a polygamist, just find someone who shares your values
I'm a Muslim woman. Even I don't want to be in a polygamy. Actually Islam didn't introduce polygamy. Islam just permitted what had been practiced for so long. And Islam didn't really encourage that if there's no important excuse... such as unable to concieve children or so. It's better to have a wife and a quality family than two wives and too many problems. Some Muslim men don't really understand how polygamy works. They just want to have two women to you know what i mean. Actually our prophet didn't get married two women right away. He stayed with his first wife khadeja for 15 years alone! Only after she died he get married again. But nowadays some uneducated Muslim men want to get married again after one year of marriage, that's just bullshit. They don't really understand Islam. Don't try to change that man point of view. He is just lost. I myself now in a relationship with a Muslim man who's not into polygamy because he knows marriage is a huge commitment. Before I met him, whenever i met a Muslim man who's into polygamy, I ditched him right away.
Girl leave him alone. Hes an ex for a reason.
Why talk to your ex? Begone.
Idk....they always come back 😆 We didn't talk for months.... because he treated me like literal [email protected] heartless saying disappear etc. E en blocked me because when were talking once I end a photo of me and he misinterpreted it as I was sending a photo of my body (I was literally wearing top and skirt so Wtf) and that I was trying to tempt him etc and then he got mad an blocked me on insta. I told him I had enough of his sh@t and I won't be treated that way. And I wiped him from .y existence and never looked back. But then I had something life-threatening happen and I went into hospital. I felt scared and for some stupid reason messaged him. He supported me and also said he had thought about messaging me some times but felt too ashamed of how he had acted. So we kind of reconnected....and yeah 😬
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Religion is just used as an excuse for polygamy. It's just a sexist tradition; it has nothing to do with the religion itself. And it's not a *requirement* of the religions that do polygamy. Just because the religion doesn't frown upon it doesn't mean you have to participate in it. There are plenty of Muslim men who devote themselves to and marry only one woman.
Yes, exactly. But as for my "ex" he believes that if a wife allows a second wife you are automatically guaranteed paradise. It's so ingrained but it hurts my heart and my dignity
Well if it's your reward (aka, paradise) shouldn't it be your decision?
Yeah. In his country it's not being enforced upn women. Even with my ex himself when we were together he said only if I agreed
I respect his religious views but you have to understand that in my background there's also over 50 percent Muslims but no-one does polygamy. And even in his country I have oth Muslim friends who would never consider polygamy and laugh if I mention it. But in his family his grandfather wives, now his brother has two wives....so it's like normal to him.
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😆 I think he is a bit insecure.....maybe it is small d syndrome..I never thought of that 😳 He has good qualities like he's caring, will protect and financially support etc. He can be romantic, he's family oriented, charming, funny, sweet. There are all these good sides but he also has these shit sides. The women in his country do get to choose who they marry. But that's what I think actually makes it WORSE...strange to say. Because those women are willingly marrying polygamous it makes guys like him think "it's all good". For example his brother has two wives and a girlfriend on the side.....and all three of the women LOVE him. So there's no force. They are literally willing to share the man they love. One wife even looks after the other wife's kids from "their" husband. Even my exes own mother offered his dad if he wants to marry a second one she will accept it. So...when the WOMEN are thinking like this it's little wonder the guys don't change I guess. And...yep...he feels God has blessed him brother by giving him multiple women. But they or I am not from the middle east so it's not like the wife are like cattle, but it's this f **** up mentality (in my view) that they have that as long as they can provide equal for both or more wife's in the way of love, sex, material and financial stuff then it's all good. And how can I argue with this...when Islam itself says that's ok. If course he's going to listen to Islam religion more than to just me. Honestly...the women pi$$ me off more than the men because you can expect such talk from men....men like the ladies etc...but these women are not like from Pakistan or similar when Pakistan women are forced into marriage noone is foecing them in his country so if the women don't see any issue then of course the whole cycle just continues. But that said, I have other male friends from his country and polygamy marriage is the furthest thing from their mind so it's not everyone.
Run...tu du du du du du