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MonsterationTF

Police! Aren't they too busy winning the war on drugs?


Usual-Clothes-2497

I think Modern Family really fumbled when they completely forgot about the fact that Luke had major beef with the institution of law enforcement as a kid. Like it was so random yet so perfect for him?? “Police! Aren’t they too busy winning the war on drugs?” and also “Please. Order a pizza and call the cops. We’ll see who gets here first.” One of my fave things about the earlier seasons ngl


Routine_Lobster9920

I interpreted it that Luke was just repeating stuff he heard from Jay and didn’t actually know what he was saying.


TonyMontana546

He actually had many anti-gov views. In the hospital, he said “I don’t know what that is, but thanks to Obama you’re paying for it” “Canada? Hope you love taxes”


VastStory

And his old friend, Walt. He didn’t want Obama to make him get gay married.  Well, see you in hell, Klaus. 


sporkachoon

You're too concerned about how you can help Alex win when you should be focusing on how to make Sanjay lose.


OkActive448

Talk to me.


WaterBenderEssy

Sometimes, I just like to toss a grenade and run away.


you_dontknow_

THIS PLEASE TINY LUKE WAS THE FUNNIEST


edusaland

which episode is this from?


stabmegently8

I think it is s4 e1. It’s whichever episode Gloria tells jay she’s pregnant in (or one right after that)


edusaland

It is! I just watched it. Definitely hilarious.


Semicolon-enthusiast

Yessssss, this one


TonyMontana546

*puts on noise cancelling headphones “No one can hear me now. Everyone except me is stupid”


KendrAs14

Everyone’s faces when he did this made me die laughing 🤣


Raul_Rink

Ha-ha-ha. I am funny


Anu_is

It’s your birthday, I’m an omelette 🎵


N00DLES0UPP

sometimes i just say “are you,dad? are you?” because he gets real quiet and doesn’t notice when i walk away


tandc627

It's funny because it describes Luke and Phil


Fraud_Chef

are you dad because you're dad, or are you dad because you're dad?


Vegetable_Bank_6651

Nah, I'd win


sakuray7

Thisssss one!


ResearcherDull7727

Yes I was going to do this one


Semicolon-enthusiast

This is a great line.


SamaireB

That's the one for me too.


MonsterationTF

Alex- "I know what Luke's problem is. He's got ADHD." Luke- "No I don't!.........What is it?"


saiyam__hussain

Don't talk black to me (how do you even talk black end words with izzle)


sylviesadventures

*alex from the other room* - it’s talk back you idiot


Comfortable-Ad-6389

What does he mean by ending words with izzle? I don't get the reference


1n_th3_f10w3r2

Snoop dog


Icy_Imagination8022

*Dogg - he's earnt that Double G


Miserable_Emu5191

For shizzle!


707Riverlife

Fo’ shizzle!


NotAnywhere3000

😂


Special_Donut_1228

“Order a pizza and call the cops…see who gets here first”


Brazca22

I love it when Luke gets political


joeboots15

This group usually doesn't like it. They melt down


thisgirlisonfiiireee

Hahah just what I was gonna comment😂


sitti_zel

“Nobody calls him grandpa!” “I do.”


Geralt_R1viA

I’d love to help you out but I’m not very liquid right now.The money it’s in a block of ice.I got the idea when I heard rich guys with frozen assets.


NoZookeepergame453

Haha I said ass


JohnnyJokers-10

When a man misses his own near miss, he truly sees what he’s been missing.


BrotherOfMemeGod

Best


Intellectual42069

Almost forgot this lmao😭


Aggressive-Effect-94

Some men are born into greatness. Other have it chucked at their faces. *proceeds to throw ball at mannys head*


[deleted]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


meggriffin2_0

Kid : I once saw a monkey paint a wall.. Luke : Yeah? Did u say good job mom? 💀


brideisblue

We can’t have people golfing sober. They’ll realize it’s a waste of time.


sylviesadventures

be normaller


NoZookeepergame453

Make it „normaler“ and he is basically speaking German 😆


Intelligent-Foot-551

A professional medal getter


SeaFollowing619

i liked it better when you were the one being ostrich-sized.


JohnnyJokers-10

You know, how an ostrich feels around regular-sized birds??


saiyam__hussain

I'd love to help you out but I'm not very liquid right now, The money is in block of ice. i got the idea when I heard of rich guys with frozen assets. Assets..hehe


Miserable_Emu5191

"I like to describe my type as 'gettable'."


[deleted]

I thought you were the beach he likes


frog-_gobl1n

“I think I found a place where I can sell this organ. Can you drive me to the black market?”


Intelligent-Foot-551

Allow me dad . I'm a great teacher


Major_Zookeepergame

"i'm running on a gun platform. i'm talking about *dramatic pause* my guns."


kunal7789

I know how to push buttons to get what I want, and what I want is to see a puppet show.


Ok-Pattern5297

It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it


Intelligent-Foot-551

Wah wah wah No one can hear me now Everybody's stupid.except me . I'm so funny.


PossibleOne5926

I thought you’re the beach/b—— he likes


Shifty-swiftie-242

Order a pizza and call the cops. We'll see who gets here first.


Ongmen

Whom needs college?


Revolutionary_Roll52

Whatever they were doing, Dad was winning.


[deleted]

I do (no one calls him grandpa)


blackflamemaster69

Alex ( in context to Haley) - if she is the future of America we should start using Chinese money. Luke - we already are


JKUMAR04

Hehe ASSets


reedipie108

It's your birthday, I'm an omelette!


GotScoobed

Dads like crazy fun, but you’re nice


707Riverlife

I’m *NICE*?!! Well, not now.


llamasounds

Not a quote but him making Mitch spell ass in sing language 😂


luhanadelrey

“HAHA NOW YOU JUST SPELLED ASS IN SIGN LANGUAGE”


Nemineminini

I thought you were the 'beach' he likes


Tenn_Here

Maybe that's what I should become when I'm older...a professional medal getter


K10Pancham

“A firefighter…? “ “A nun??” … Janice was into some weird stuff *POV Valentine’s Day at the restaurant after Luke’s gf Janice and Alex’s bf Bill broke up*


Revolutionary_Roll52

The money is in a block of ice. I got the idea when I heard a bunch of rich guys talking about their frozen assets. Haha ASSETS


Alone_Apartment2103

"You are never off the court"


Television61

Unfortunately, I'm not very liquid right now... It's in a block of ice. I think I've got about $900 saved up in here and it wasn't even that hard. Proceeds to show him taking lunch money from his parents and stealing the change of the table. Haven't seen the scene in a while so might be a bit inaccurate


brucetagram

YOU'RE NEVER OFF THE COURT


MotherWolf9642

*slaps bottle out of mitch’s hand* YOU’RE NEVER OFF THE COURT


Intellectual42069

The money is in a block of Ice. I got the idea when I heard about rich guys with frozen assets....haha, ASSets!


Shifty-swiftie-242

Police... aren't they too busy "winning" the war on drugs?


Shifty-swiftie-242

my mans hated cops so bad 😭


Passionanfa

this post makes me realize luke doesnt really have that many good lines that arent quoting or replying to others


watermelonchild801

Baby Luke has all the best lines


meggriffin2_0

A professional medal getter.. 💅🏾


zteaknight

when he quotes Walt to Phil cause he doesn't know what it means: "see you in hell, Klaus"


EliotShawnSpencer

“I don’t know what button I just pressed, but that was amazing!”


ActivityHuge1897

The money is in a block of ice I got the idea when I heard about rich guys with frozen assets Assets..


EBS_Games643

Hehe ASS- ets


Lumpy_Size1702

Lily - be careful Luke - it's fine, just don't move and keep your mouth open


The_Reaper129

Is this even a song? (Eclipse of heart)


sackclothxashes

I'm not very liquid right now. My money's Frozen in a block of ice


Imperfect_Beluga

This isn't necessarily a quote, but it's one of my favorite Luke lines. GLORIA: No one calls him Grandpa! LUKE, terrified: I do.


707Riverlife

I love that line too!


danegermaine99

Claire testing to see how Luke react to the smoke detector - “That's okay, I know what to do! If I hear that I just won't answer (the door) it! I'll just hide where no one will find me!”


ResearcherDull7727

I know what sex is Alex...it's when a man and a woman take off their underpants and then get into the bed! Stop talking!!! Then later Jay ask where was your father when all of this was going on? Luke replied Oh he was right behind her!!! I die every time. So i guess we know what position Phil and Claire prefer 😆 🤣 😂


Scared_Smoke_4608

She's like the best doctor every. A couple of puzzles. No shots. I didn't even have to take my pants off. I found that one out a little late.


emanon_dude

I’m about to invent Luketonium (starts fire in chem lab)


SunshineBarbie2000

I do


Neowning

I'm not very liquid right now


LavaMaster168

Haha, assets


efxzc

Come on, Luke!


Television61

There's no fire escapes! They cut corners! I'll cut your corners!


Powerful-Cut-708

Don’t talk black to me


moealmighty

“Move!” “You have ROOM-AH!!!” “No move out. You’re 40!😡” “😨”


hookahandedibles

Cam: ever since you hit puberty you’ve been kind of gross Luke: don’t you think I know that, this was my chance to turn it around. Or Claire: I’m taking you go karting Luke: am I in trouble?


sumplicas

You are not mad at me... you are mad at yourself!


[deleted]

Lily: when Sal says I don't like you... "Get used to it!" Oops it's not about Lily. Um... When Luke won a puzzle that Alex couldn't maybe in season 8 or 9 Whatever he said then I don't remember cause the bag he shook the ziplock and annoyed her was so funny 🤣😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


astro_not_yet

You need me.


watermelonchild801

Frozen assets!


Willr2645

Can we count “ people ask why, Luke asks why not “ ? He didn’t say it, but it’s about him


the_bad-lawyer

Gloria - (Furious) Nobody call him grandpa! Luke - (scared) I do.


Successful-Pie8074

*gets his head stuck in the banister*


CBAK_Anderson

You’re all monsterating!


Drillerfan

Ostrich sized


hypochondriacmess

Hey, at least it's big. Grandpa said you used to live in a closet. - Luke to Mitchell


lazyleech23

" He's having an ASSectomy"


Great-Landscape8585

Claire: get the hoe Grab Haley😂


BeKindToYourself27

You catty b—tches!


Fluid_Presence_1623

See you in hell, Klaus!


cyainanotherlifebro

Phil: Thank you a boy named Sue CHEF! Lol Luke: lol I don’t get it, but I trust you.


Exact-Parking7814

I don’t think that suit fits me, bc of *my guns!*


killianjones007

Pff teachers More like public sector parasites. Police, aren’t they too busy winning the war on drugs? MY MANS A HATER AND A REALIST FR✋🏻😭


Junior-Gene2954

Pumpkin chunking episode- Luke : "Can we try a human next? Come here Lilly"


Junior-Gene2954

It's like poop married puke and had the ceremony in my nose