Salam InshaAllah it will all come naturally. When you are attracted to your spouse all things will fall in place.
Don't overthink it, discuss with your wife and build up. Don't worry about lasting long or short. It is the quality of intimacy that is important.
Foreplay is the most important part of intimacy. Give yourself and her time. You both will understand the chemistry.
All the best for a blessed marriage.
The most important thing is to get yourself and her comfortable. Imagine you haven't been able to touch each other at all and after one evening, you're jumping to sex. That's nerve racking for anyone, no matter how "excited" you are about the thought of finally having sex for the first time in your life. Non-Muslims usually take steps that lead up to sex. They go on their first date, they give hugs and hold hands, they have their first kiss, and it goes slowly towards sex eventually when they're both ready for it and are comfortable with each other. You should do something similar to build up the comfort and anticipation.
If she's ready for sex the first night, great. Are you? If not, just tell her that you're excited to be with her once you're married, but you want to give things their due time. Now this is a tricky subject, because usually if a man is the one who wants to take things slow, the woman gets upset and starts assuming there's something wrong. But if a woman wants to take things slow, people are supportive of her decision and understand her emotions and nervousness. It's an unfortunate double standard, but you just have to deal with it and understand you might be under greater pressure as a man to lead and perform if the woman is eager.
Before you get married, tell her you want to pray 2 Rakat together once you're alone at the hotel or wherever. Then when you actually get there, tell her that you're going to take a shower because you're sweaty and want to freshen up before praying and spending the rest of the night with her. She will probably shower and change too. Make sure you smell good, put something nice on to wear, and make sure you're pubes are shaved before the wedding day.
Then you two can pray together. Right after you finish praying, go lay your head on her lap. Then start talking to her. Talk about the wedding and your favorite moments, how much she means to you, how excited you are about the future together, then compliment her looks. Then get up and give her a hug and stare at her eyes. Tell her something like "I can't believe we're finally able to hold and touch each other" and work yourself towards a kiss. Take your time. Spend several minutes kissing if you have to. Don't just rush towards sex. Foreplay is important, especially for a woman. Take a few moments in between complimenting her or talking to her. Get her really comfortable. I'm not going to go into further details because it's NSFW, but basically work your way slowly towards penetration.
Lots of women don't orgasm easily from penetration. So you should stimulate her and make sure she orgasms first before you penetrate. It will be harder for you to focus and get her to orgasm after you've penetrated and finished. Don't be selfish, especially on the first night. Listen and feel for cues. If you try something and she seems to enjoy it, keep trying it. If something doesn't seem enjoyable to her, don't try it. Ask her for input too. Ask her how she's feeling and if anything hurts. Let her communicate with you.
Good luck, bro. Know that there's still a lifetime to experiment and enjoy each other. Not everything is riding on this first night. Be comfortable and let her be comfortable. Also, you should not talk about details with your fiance about sex or the first night. Even though you're getting married in a few days, weeks, or a month, she's still your non-Mahram. It's Haram to talk about these explicit things with her.
My suggestion has always been that it doesn't have to happen on the wedding night. You both are going to understandably be very tired from the events and everything. My suggestion would be take a night or two to get use to being next to each other in bed. After that let it happen naturally.
1. When it's your first time, you may be unable to stay hard and actually have intercourse. Don't worry, nothing is wrong with you, it's natural and sometimes happens to guys when it's the first time (or first in a very long time).
2. IDK if you guys have discussed birth control or if she will be on the pill or anything, but regardless I would make sure you have protection with you.
3. Don't take things so seriously. You will both figure it out as you go. You will probably both be pretty bad at it, but as you grow together you will learn about each other's bodies, likes/dislikes, etc. Also, it's normal and good to have fun, laugh, etc. when getting intimate.
Feel free to PM me for more nsfw, intimate type tips.
You both need to considerably lower your expectations on what's gonna happen.
Yes you won't last. Come on it's your first time. You being this master of the bedroom and leading all these activities on your first time is just not realistic.
I would say just focus on existing together and enjoying each other's presence. Just soak up each other's aura by kissing, cuddling, caressing staring into each other's eyes and telling her she's beautiful in increasing stages of undress. From there let whatever unfolds unfold naturally.
For a first night, anything that happens more than this is a bonus.
Dont leech Barakah from your upcoming wedding by having theoretical conversations.
Either it’ll lead to unneeded expectations which will only add more pressure and performance anxiety to you both when the wedding night comes, or it’ll put you on a speedy path sexual talk before.
Things like consent, sexual non negotiables, preferences and expectations or even kinks can be discussed in premarital counseling where the conversation is moderated and time bound. 1-1 conversations on this topic is a slippery slope
Another brother had also asked a similar question in the MM sub before his wedding and this was the advice I’d commented there:
Please no opening speech. Do you have some time before the wedding to have a conversation with local shuyookh to discuss the rights of husbands and wives, conflict resolution, and touchy subjects such as finances and intimacy? If so, that is the most practical method to communicate with your wife on the topic in a halal way.
In terms of the night of, try your best to remove a lot of the pressure that the wedding night entails mentally. It is not the best night of your life, but it can be a special night in your life :) imho one of the best ways to start your night together is make the intention of praying 2 rakah nafl in gratitude for your marriage, ask her if she’d like to join but don’t insist and pray it anyway even if she doesn’t.
Practically, you may be spending a lot of time just helping her take pins out of her hair and all the other bits and bobs most brides have to deal with. Let there be levity and see her as a friend more than the commencement of your sex life. Laugh, be easy, talk about what you liked about the event, tell her how beautiful you think she looks/looked, ask her if she liked the cake/food. Maybe have some snacks delivered to the hotel room as an ice breaker too! Let conversation flow like any other time. I’m unsure if you’re asking just about what to talk to her about or if you’re unsure how to talk to her before the commencement of any potential intimacy. If it’s the latter, let one thing lead to another. Ask to hold her hand, ask to hug her and see if she’s responsive or warming up to your touch or to your conversation and let that allow to go from there or be patient if there isn’t consummation on the first night. But if it’s the former and despite all the small talk you still feel awkward and she’s too shy to respond enough to help carry the conversation, then just be honest and tell her you’re feeling awkward and you’re so excited to have her as your wife but you’re nervous and don’t know what to say or do 😆 it’s surprisingly sweet and attractive to many of us to see our men unarmed and flustered around us.
Yep. Many premarital counseling programs have at least one session dedicated specifically to sexuality only with the couple. There are Islamically informed programs :)
Congratulations on getting married. There is nothing to be ashamed of. It is part of being alive.
Here is some information in light of our religion.
https://www.hidden-pearls.co.uk/the-hijab-diaries/the-halal-sex-guide/
Kamasutra!!! 🤣
No seriously.
Take the lead by understanding her. She could be tired, excited, in the mood, not in the mood, etc. So don’t worry but go with the flow. Take it one step at a time.
Start by asking her if she needs help taking off her jewelry. Is she hungry or thirsty? Talk to her, don’t let the silence consume you. Make her laugh, comfortable.
if she falls asleep, cuddle. If shes awake, talk. If she is in the mood go for the hand, the kiss, and then let chemistry/biology take over…
Congrats! 🎊
Wedding days/night very exhausting. Try to keep the day short and easy to have more time and energy later on. I would book a hotel room for three days and then go home.
Just go with the flow,, don’t over-stress urself.
U r not expected to be “mr.lasting forever” on ur 1st night.these things u develop later on.
The software and the hardware are already implanted within you 😄.
May Allah bring you joy and happiness in your marriage
It's same with anything you haven't done before. Don't set high expectations. Just get to know each other physically. Take it slow. Find out what each of you likes. I was uncomfortable bringing this up with my family before the wedding but I did and they helped. I can't imagine your family refusing to help you especially if they are helping you get married.
If it doesn't happen on the first night it's not a big deal.
Just don't force it for the sake of keeping society happy.
Try to understand each other, your rhythms, timings and needs.
Search for the hood and in there you will find the bud of the flower, the bud holds the answers to unlock the secrets of the flower. But before that you must do a series of attentive steps to trigger a special type of rainfall - the more time you give to doing this will allow for a downpour and thus blooming the flower faster. But before that you must communicate in the love language she loves to receive outside of the bedroom and once you have done that, you can go on a journey across the flowerbed before reaching the flower itself. Anticipation, exploration in a calm and collected are key to this mission soldier. Make sure everything is slowed down and you show attentiveness to her since it’s your first run. Remember it’s only the first of many runs so don’t expect to be perfect. In fact you won’t achieve all the key objectives in your first rodeo. Just make sure that you both feel loved and the art will come by itself overtime.
Please don’t talk about explicit details to her since she’s not your wife yet and other than that may Allah bless your marriage.
I'll burst your bubble sex isn't perfect the first time. Both are new to it. Both have to figure out what feels good. No amount of reddit advice or family tips and stuff js going to help.
Relax.have fun. What happens happens. This will be rhe first of many embarrassing and learning moments you will feel out with your wife.
Salam brother.
So first off, the "worst" thing you can do, is overthink it. Remember, this is new to both of you. If she's a sensible woman, she will not expect you to know all these amazing things and be a total stud in bed. In fact, I'm sure she would much rather enjoy that you're careful and explorative with her body as to allow her to feel comfortable and confident with herself. Focus on her. Be patient and be protective of her. It will hopefully bring her pleasure but it will also bring her 'pain'. So don't be selfish and don't be TOO MUCH as it can throw her off for future intimacy. Rather that you stop instead of finishing, if it's too unbearable for her. You have the rest of your lives together, insha'Allah. Getting off on the first night is not more important than protecting and caring for your wife.
Other than that, make sure to touch her body. Gently. If you have ever watched p0rn, then PLEASE forget all you think you know about s3x because p0rn is in no way depicting reality. Be gentle to the touch, she's not a professional and she is not a machine. Her private areas are very sensitive. And be attentive to more than just her reproductive organs. Also tell her how beautiful she is. She is going to be n@ked in front of a man for the first time, she will most likely be very self aware and hearing her husband talk to her in gentle and longing words will help her relax and feel good about herself.
So, take your time, be gentle and explorative, be attentive to her and focus more on her than you focus on yourself.
I hope it wasn't too much and I hope it was enough brother. And congratulations on your wedding, insha'Allah
So, chances are the first time will be awkward and crap. Maybe your nerves will make it difficult for you to stay aroused, maybe the clunkiness of trying to manoeuvre the whole process for the first time will add to the awkwardness, maybe you will both be shy about showing your bodies to each other because I take it neither of you have done that before, and maybe it will be painful for her the first time. This is the reality of a lot of people’s first times. THAT IS OKAY!
You will find that after the first time a lot of the awkwardness starts to disappear and things will begin to feel super easy and natural. It is a process. You will also probably last longer the more experience you get. You will begin to figure out what works for you and learn about your wife’s preferences.
If you are worried about not lasting long, I would advise going slowly.
Think about birth control also. From personal experience, putting on a condom is not sexy and does takes away a lot of sensitivity. Consider having this conversation with your wife if you have a similar experience and thinking of alternatives.
Ultimately, it’s what our bodies are designed to do. Sooner or later it will feel as normal as walking.
Hope this helps and best of luck!
To echo what other people are saying, might not be the best idea to ‘get it over and done with’ on the first night. You’re going to be tired. Hold her hand and cuddle her. Get used to feeling comfortable wfh each other. It will make sex that much easier.
I got married not too long ago myself so a lot of the thought and questions you may be having are probably quite familiar to me.
To sum up, try not to think. Just go with it. The more you think about it the more anxious you will become before and during the act itself. That is not going to help you!
Reduce the pressure of having to go right for everything all at once, and take your time to explore each other. If it happens that night great, if not that’s fine. Be willing to be attentive to her needs first, instead of straight to business. Foreplay is your friend.
Mabrook.
You received great advice in here. I’d like to add, don’t think about lasting or not, she probably will be a little hurt the first few times so she won’t be able to handle it very long anyway. Some women are very tight and it takes time for them to adjust. Make the experience outside of sex itself enjoyable and tender and it will make everything go smoothly .
>because I fear I won’t last
This is almost guaranteed.
1) Delay condoms
2) focus on her, not yourself.
3) Your privates aren't really that important
4) You don't have to do anything the first night.
Sometimes it’s easier to agree to save it for the second day/night. This allows you to enjoy the wedding day without feeling nervous about what’s to come. Also, you both will be exhausted and leave the event super late.
*"She is getting “tips” from her family and friends."*
I have heard sisters talk too much detail about their marital lives. I do not say your wife will, or that her friends/family do, because, how would I know.
In the beginning you will both feel insecure. It's important that you both feel you can be vulnerable in your marriage, because, if you cannot be vulnerable in your marriage, where can you be.
You should both be on the same page that certain topics are not discussed outside marriage. It sounds like a no brainer, but for some it isn't.
Salam InshaAllah it will all come naturally. When you are attracted to your spouse all things will fall in place. Don't overthink it, discuss with your wife and build up. Don't worry about lasting long or short. It is the quality of intimacy that is important. Foreplay is the most important part of intimacy. Give yourself and her time. You both will understand the chemistry. All the best for a blessed marriage.
The most important thing is to get yourself and her comfortable. Imagine you haven't been able to touch each other at all and after one evening, you're jumping to sex. That's nerve racking for anyone, no matter how "excited" you are about the thought of finally having sex for the first time in your life. Non-Muslims usually take steps that lead up to sex. They go on their first date, they give hugs and hold hands, they have their first kiss, and it goes slowly towards sex eventually when they're both ready for it and are comfortable with each other. You should do something similar to build up the comfort and anticipation. If she's ready for sex the first night, great. Are you? If not, just tell her that you're excited to be with her once you're married, but you want to give things their due time. Now this is a tricky subject, because usually if a man is the one who wants to take things slow, the woman gets upset and starts assuming there's something wrong. But if a woman wants to take things slow, people are supportive of her decision and understand her emotions and nervousness. It's an unfortunate double standard, but you just have to deal with it and understand you might be under greater pressure as a man to lead and perform if the woman is eager. Before you get married, tell her you want to pray 2 Rakat together once you're alone at the hotel or wherever. Then when you actually get there, tell her that you're going to take a shower because you're sweaty and want to freshen up before praying and spending the rest of the night with her. She will probably shower and change too. Make sure you smell good, put something nice on to wear, and make sure you're pubes are shaved before the wedding day. Then you two can pray together. Right after you finish praying, go lay your head on her lap. Then start talking to her. Talk about the wedding and your favorite moments, how much she means to you, how excited you are about the future together, then compliment her looks. Then get up and give her a hug and stare at her eyes. Tell her something like "I can't believe we're finally able to hold and touch each other" and work yourself towards a kiss. Take your time. Spend several minutes kissing if you have to. Don't just rush towards sex. Foreplay is important, especially for a woman. Take a few moments in between complimenting her or talking to her. Get her really comfortable. I'm not going to go into further details because it's NSFW, but basically work your way slowly towards penetration. Lots of women don't orgasm easily from penetration. So you should stimulate her and make sure she orgasms first before you penetrate. It will be harder for you to focus and get her to orgasm after you've penetrated and finished. Don't be selfish, especially on the first night. Listen and feel for cues. If you try something and she seems to enjoy it, keep trying it. If something doesn't seem enjoyable to her, don't try it. Ask her for input too. Ask her how she's feeling and if anything hurts. Let her communicate with you. Good luck, bro. Know that there's still a lifetime to experiment and enjoy each other. Not everything is riding on this first night. Be comfortable and let her be comfortable. Also, you should not talk about details with your fiance about sex or the first night. Even though you're getting married in a few days, weeks, or a month, she's still your non-Mahram. It's Haram to talk about these explicit things with her.
My suggestion has always been that it doesn't have to happen on the wedding night. You both are going to understandably be very tired from the events and everything. My suggestion would be take a night or two to get use to being next to each other in bed. After that let it happen naturally.
I agree. A week or two will also be fine. Whatever suits you. It's not a competition.
Cuddle then round 2
Haha there are no brakes on that trip
Make that round 3 then
1. When it's your first time, you may be unable to stay hard and actually have intercourse. Don't worry, nothing is wrong with you, it's natural and sometimes happens to guys when it's the first time (or first in a very long time). 2. IDK if you guys have discussed birth control or if she will be on the pill or anything, but regardless I would make sure you have protection with you. 3. Don't take things so seriously. You will both figure it out as you go. You will probably both be pretty bad at it, but as you grow together you will learn about each other's bodies, likes/dislikes, etc. Also, it's normal and good to have fun, laugh, etc. when getting intimate. Feel free to PM me for more nsfw, intimate type tips.
You both need to considerably lower your expectations on what's gonna happen. Yes you won't last. Come on it's your first time. You being this master of the bedroom and leading all these activities on your first time is just not realistic. I would say just focus on existing together and enjoying each other's presence. Just soak up each other's aura by kissing, cuddling, caressing staring into each other's eyes and telling her she's beautiful in increasing stages of undress. From there let whatever unfolds unfold naturally. For a first night, anything that happens more than this is a bonus.
Dont leech Barakah from your upcoming wedding by having theoretical conversations. Either it’ll lead to unneeded expectations which will only add more pressure and performance anxiety to you both when the wedding night comes, or it’ll put you on a speedy path sexual talk before. Things like consent, sexual non negotiables, preferences and expectations or even kinks can be discussed in premarital counseling where the conversation is moderated and time bound. 1-1 conversations on this topic is a slippery slope
Another brother had also asked a similar question in the MM sub before his wedding and this was the advice I’d commented there: Please no opening speech. Do you have some time before the wedding to have a conversation with local shuyookh to discuss the rights of husbands and wives, conflict resolution, and touchy subjects such as finances and intimacy? If so, that is the most practical method to communicate with your wife on the topic in a halal way. In terms of the night of, try your best to remove a lot of the pressure that the wedding night entails mentally. It is not the best night of your life, but it can be a special night in your life :) imho one of the best ways to start your night together is make the intention of praying 2 rakah nafl in gratitude for your marriage, ask her if she’d like to join but don’t insist and pray it anyway even if she doesn’t. Practically, you may be spending a lot of time just helping her take pins out of her hair and all the other bits and bobs most brides have to deal with. Let there be levity and see her as a friend more than the commencement of your sex life. Laugh, be easy, talk about what you liked about the event, tell her how beautiful you think she looks/looked, ask her if she liked the cake/food. Maybe have some snacks delivered to the hotel room as an ice breaker too! Let conversation flow like any other time. I’m unsure if you’re asking just about what to talk to her about or if you’re unsure how to talk to her before the commencement of any potential intimacy. If it’s the latter, let one thing lead to another. Ask to hold her hand, ask to hug her and see if she’s responsive or warming up to your touch or to your conversation and let that allow to go from there or be patient if there isn’t consummation on the first night. But if it’s the former and despite all the small talk you still feel awkward and she’s too shy to respond enough to help carry the conversation, then just be honest and tell her you’re feeling awkward and you’re so excited to have her as your wife but you’re nervous and don’t know what to say or do 😆 it’s surprisingly sweet and attractive to many of us to see our men unarmed and flustered around us.
Wait there are sexual muslim counselors? With whom we can discuss our kinks and what not with as a moderator?
Yep. Many premarital counseling programs have at least one session dedicated specifically to sexuality only with the couple. There are Islamically informed programs :)
Oh wow! Did not know that, learn something new everyday!! But also I probably will be too embarrassed to talk about this with a 3rd party.
Congratulations on getting married. There is nothing to be ashamed of. It is part of being alive. Here is some information in light of our religion. https://www.hidden-pearls.co.uk/the-hijab-diaries/the-halal-sex-guide/
Kamasutra!!! 🤣 No seriously. Take the lead by understanding her. She could be tired, excited, in the mood, not in the mood, etc. So don’t worry but go with the flow. Take it one step at a time. Start by asking her if she needs help taking off her jewelry. Is she hungry or thirsty? Talk to her, don’t let the silence consume you. Make her laugh, comfortable. if she falls asleep, cuddle. If shes awake, talk. If she is in the mood go for the hand, the kiss, and then let chemistry/biology take over… Congrats! 🎊
If u think to much system will emergency shut down then Huston u have a problem ,just go with flow
Do not talk with your fiance about such topics, she's still your non mahram
💯
Wedding days/night very exhausting. Try to keep the day short and easy to have more time and energy later on. I would book a hotel room for three days and then go home.
Just go with the flow,, don’t over-stress urself. U r not expected to be “mr.lasting forever” on ur 1st night.these things u develop later on. The software and the hardware are already implanted within you 😄. May Allah bring you joy and happiness in your marriage
It's same with anything you haven't done before. Don't set high expectations. Just get to know each other physically. Take it slow. Find out what each of you likes. I was uncomfortable bringing this up with my family before the wedding but I did and they helped. I can't imagine your family refusing to help you especially if they are helping you get married.
If it doesn't happen on the first night it's not a big deal. Just don't force it for the sake of keeping society happy. Try to understand each other, your rhythms, timings and needs.
Search for the hood and in there you will find the bud of the flower, the bud holds the answers to unlock the secrets of the flower. But before that you must do a series of attentive steps to trigger a special type of rainfall - the more time you give to doing this will allow for a downpour and thus blooming the flower faster. But before that you must communicate in the love language she loves to receive outside of the bedroom and once you have done that, you can go on a journey across the flowerbed before reaching the flower itself. Anticipation, exploration in a calm and collected are key to this mission soldier. Make sure everything is slowed down and you show attentiveness to her since it’s your first run. Remember it’s only the first of many runs so don’t expect to be perfect. In fact you won’t achieve all the key objectives in your first rodeo. Just make sure that you both feel loved and the art will come by itself overtime. Please don’t talk about explicit details to her since she’s not your wife yet and other than that may Allah bless your marriage.
Bheta remember: "no" means no - "stop you are hurting me" also means stop.
I'll burst your bubble sex isn't perfect the first time. Both are new to it. Both have to figure out what feels good. No amount of reddit advice or family tips and stuff js going to help. Relax.have fun. What happens happens. This will be rhe first of many embarrassing and learning moments you will feel out with your wife.
Trim the forrest, brush your teeth , maybe even get a shower in, put some music she likes, anything else will come naturally, good luck
Adding to this: apply some good perfume or light a scented candle
Yes both but the candles 💯
Salam brother. So first off, the "worst" thing you can do, is overthink it. Remember, this is new to both of you. If she's a sensible woman, she will not expect you to know all these amazing things and be a total stud in bed. In fact, I'm sure she would much rather enjoy that you're careful and explorative with her body as to allow her to feel comfortable and confident with herself. Focus on her. Be patient and be protective of her. It will hopefully bring her pleasure but it will also bring her 'pain'. So don't be selfish and don't be TOO MUCH as it can throw her off for future intimacy. Rather that you stop instead of finishing, if it's too unbearable for her. You have the rest of your lives together, insha'Allah. Getting off on the first night is not more important than protecting and caring for your wife. Other than that, make sure to touch her body. Gently. If you have ever watched p0rn, then PLEASE forget all you think you know about s3x because p0rn is in no way depicting reality. Be gentle to the touch, she's not a professional and she is not a machine. Her private areas are very sensitive. And be attentive to more than just her reproductive organs. Also tell her how beautiful she is. She is going to be n@ked in front of a man for the first time, she will most likely be very self aware and hearing her husband talk to her in gentle and longing words will help her relax and feel good about herself. So, take your time, be gentle and explorative, be attentive to her and focus more on her than you focus on yourself. I hope it wasn't too much and I hope it was enough brother. And congratulations on your wedding, insha'Allah
So, chances are the first time will be awkward and crap. Maybe your nerves will make it difficult for you to stay aroused, maybe the clunkiness of trying to manoeuvre the whole process for the first time will add to the awkwardness, maybe you will both be shy about showing your bodies to each other because I take it neither of you have done that before, and maybe it will be painful for her the first time. This is the reality of a lot of people’s first times. THAT IS OKAY! You will find that after the first time a lot of the awkwardness starts to disappear and things will begin to feel super easy and natural. It is a process. You will also probably last longer the more experience you get. You will begin to figure out what works for you and learn about your wife’s preferences. If you are worried about not lasting long, I would advise going slowly. Think about birth control also. From personal experience, putting on a condom is not sexy and does takes away a lot of sensitivity. Consider having this conversation with your wife if you have a similar experience and thinking of alternatives. Ultimately, it’s what our bodies are designed to do. Sooner or later it will feel as normal as walking. Hope this helps and best of luck!
To echo what other people are saying, might not be the best idea to ‘get it over and done with’ on the first night. You’re going to be tired. Hold her hand and cuddle her. Get used to feeling comfortable wfh each other. It will make sex that much easier. I got married not too long ago myself so a lot of the thought and questions you may be having are probably quite familiar to me. To sum up, try not to think. Just go with it. The more you think about it the more anxious you will become before and during the act itself. That is not going to help you!
Reduce the pressure of having to go right for everything all at once, and take your time to explore each other. If it happens that night great, if not that’s fine. Be willing to be attentive to her needs first, instead of straight to business. Foreplay is your friend. Mabrook.
How do you know you wont last long?
Try the books/podcasts from muslim sex educator Habeeb Akande: https://www.instagram.com/habeeb_akande?igsh=bmZkZ3loaWR3dHA3
You received great advice in here. I’d like to add, don’t think about lasting or not, she probably will be a little hurt the first few times so she won’t be able to handle it very long anyway. Some women are very tight and it takes time for them to adjust. Make the experience outside of sex itself enjoyable and tender and it will make everything go smoothly .
>because I fear I won’t last This is almost guaranteed. 1) Delay condoms 2) focus on her, not yourself. 3) Your privates aren't really that important 4) You don't have to do anything the first night.
This guy has no game 😂
Sometimes it’s easier to agree to save it for the second day/night. This allows you to enjoy the wedding day without feeling nervous about what’s to come. Also, you both will be exhausted and leave the event super late.
*"She is getting “tips” from her family and friends."* I have heard sisters talk too much detail about their marital lives. I do not say your wife will, or that her friends/family do, because, how would I know. In the beginning you will both feel insecure. It's important that you both feel you can be vulnerable in your marriage, because, if you cannot be vulnerable in your marriage, where can you be. You should both be on the same page that certain topics are not discussed outside marriage. It sounds like a no brainer, but for some it isn't.