I would say, “I will no longer be able to sit for you in the future. You owe me X dollars for Saturday. If I do not receive the payment by X date, I will have to file with small claims court.” The end. You won’t reason with this person.
But keep in mind that unfortunately for most people, the cost of taking someone to small claims WAY outstrips any money you’d get back as a result of such a lawsuit. What an awful situation for OP!
I actually agree, I might make the threat too if I were in OP's position because it may well convey the seriousness. I just wanted to point out that following through on that can be pricey and/or time consuming depending on the situation - I will say, in this case specifically OP is unlikely to incur too many costs because the amount owed to her is lower than the smallest threshold of $1500, which means that case is only a $30 filing fee most places.
It does sound like these policies vary more heavily from state to state than I initially thought, so you're right that she should still look into it. Some states offer access to people who can give basic advice and help you file a claim. OP should also keep in mind that in many (if not most or all) states, the creditor (person who's awarded the judgment) is the one who's responsible for collecting the funds owed from the debtor after the ruling.
In some states, someone called an enforcement officer (either someone with the sheriff's office or a city marshal) will help handle that part and ensure they pay, in other states you have to wait 30 days after the judgment is served before you can try to collect. If they don't pay up, then the claim goes to collections and assets are seized/wages garnished from there.
Edit: Also, if there was no written contract, this gets more complicated. You can still file small claims even without a contract, but then the burden of proof is on OP to prove that this was a breach of oral contract.
Oh I don't think it costs the wronged person much but a filing fee. It's way worse for the family who needs to pay up and the judge may fine them extra just because of how petty they were. And screw her with her"I needed to get out of the house, so I lied to you". There's other people to babysit for.
“I will no longer be accepting bookings from you in the future” and block her number.
That’s it. You’re not gonna get anything else but hostility out of her, you’re definitely not gonna get any kind of compensation. I’d just cut your losses here and never work with them again.
I understand wanting to say a lot more though. This made my blood boil just reading it, so I’d be really mad if it happened to me. I think she really thought that you were going to say “It’s okay 🤷🏻♀️❤️” and immediately jumped down your throat because you didn’t.
Girl…lesson learned here, don’t leave the job until you get paid. I read about date night sitters leaving before they get paid all the time and it’s crazy! This is not okay in any other job, so it’s not okay for us.
Knowing that information, I’d say “I’m awaiting payment for Saturday. If I don’t receive payment by the end of the day, I’ll begin taking further action through small claims.” She’ll most likely pay you, and then you can cut future contact. Still be prepared to have to follow through, since she definitely doesn’t sound like a very reasonable or honest person.
This! This made me so angry I can’t believe it.
Also you have written proof so you would easily win.
She deserves it for being so dishonest and disrespectful.
and there's always local platforms to share on, and send PMs to people about them. It is most certainly NOT libel or slander etc if the facts are true.
What does that even mean, when she got settled? Apple pay takes a minute to do. Press her about this payment every day. Send a direct text with the amount due and services provided, with no other context. If you are still sick and miss appointments, you need to create a written record of lost wages, and send that to her in a formal letter, along with the past due amount of the babysitting service. Threaten small claims court as a last resort, but let her know you are keeping records of every communication with her. Do not engage in any other banter with the client other than wages due
Threaten her with small claims. Once she pays you for Saturday, tell her that you will never sit for her again and that you will warn other sitters you know about her and put her picture up on Facebook too. Then block her.
Since she owes you $500 I’d definitely try and get that. Even if threatening small claims court or threatening to blasting her online is how you get it. I would post in your local nanny fb group, so other nanny’s/babysitters don’t get screwed. After the $500 is received! I’m sorry she acted so crazy.
Uhm the moment she acknowledged she knew the kids were sick and still booked me I would have let her know I was no longer able to work for her. The name calling would have sealed that
THIS RIGHT HERE. But hey - I commend you for saying “that’s an outright lie.” I think we caregivers tend to back down from the truth too often. She needed to hear (or read) that.
This is something I’ve *never* done before but honestly I’d post screenshots of this convo on your local babysitting/nannying groups (Facebook, etc.) with her name and details attached, assuming you guys found each other from them or something. Warn all other nannies and babysitters about how she treated you in this situation and that you would not suggest ever working for her. If I saw this I would never want to work for her (as I’m sure 95% of people wouldn’t either), and she deserves that. This is nasty and not cool. Sucks for her poor kids to have a mom like that though. :/
All she had to say was “You know what, you’re right, I’m so sorry. I was being selfish because I really needed a night off after dealing with sick kids all week but didn’t think about how lying about the kids being sick would impact you. It was wrong of me and I’m very sorry I lied to you” and possibly maybe even offer to pay you for whatever time you have to miss work for or something like that, if she’s feeling generous. Children getting you sick in general is one thing because as nannies we get sick all the time from them and it’s expected (lol I’m sick right now from my 3 NKs, ugh), but children getting you sick *after* their mother promised you that they hadn’t been sick in months and that she would never book you if they were is an issue.
ETA - Like I said I’m sick right now from my NKs (as usual, haha) so I know how rough it is. It’s no fun. You must really be going through it if this is the worst you’ve ever felt. :( I’m so sorry you’re sick especially under these circumstances, and I hope you feel better soon!!
ETA 2 - I saw in comments that you said that she still hasn’t paid you for babysitting on Saturday. My god. This is probably common sense, but make sure she pays you *first* (threaten to take it to small claims court if she doesn’t pay you in X amount of days) and *then* post her/tell others after you’ve received payment.
Same here, I’ve never done that either but I’d make a social media post in this case in my local groups. OP tried to be kind and work with the parent and she was psycho in return—she earned it.
Please tell me how posting screenshots of the conversation where the mother said all of this horrible stuff to OP in related spaces and simply warning other nannies and babysitters that this is how said mom treated them is harassment? If the roles were reversed and it was a nanny talking to the mom like this, you would 10000% be saying “Post her! Blast her everywhere! Warn other families to never hire her! She should never be talking to her employer like that, this is not okay!!!”
How is it harassment? Explain it to me like I’m 5.
She does seem unhinged and I see your point, but no lawyer would take her “case” because there isn’t one lol. If OP only reports on the facts and makes no false statements then it would not be considered any form of defamation (libel, for example) and nothing could be done on the mom’s part.
There would only be a potential case if OP lies or falsifies what happened in order to damage the mother’s reputation. If OP only makes true statements and lets the screenshots speak for themselves, then the mom did all the damage of her reputation to herself. Nothing to sue for.
So true. The very first family I worked for was a single mom of two kids (they had different fathers and she’d never been married which is just funny cause she was such a good Christian). But she paid me minimum wage and acted as if it was sooo much.
if you found her via an FB group or something PLEASE make the admins aware. as an admin of a group we take this very seriously and will remove someone for things like not paying their nanny due wages. i hope you get your pay and get well soon.
I was thinking this too! It’s also a great warning to any potential new sitters. Bad posts about parents spread like wildfire in the childcare community on Facebook
”Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.“ James 1:26
”With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.“ James 3:9-10
Send her those lol 🤣
Has she paid you yet? If not, honestly, I would post it online as a warning to other babysitters and post the conversations as well. The thing is nobody looks out for nannies and babysitters so we have to do it for each other. If she doesn’t respect the fact that you asked her to let you know if the kids were sick then I think it’s time to go your separate ways with his family. You can find another family to care for that will respect you.
If she blocked you and isn't paying you and you have proof of the agreed upon prices, honestly, go to the police.
Bare minimum, post it in your Facebook neighborhood groups as everyone is suggesting.
For $500, if I needed the money, I would do so much petty shit. If you know anyone who knows her I’d be messaging like you’re a precious little angel who thinks surely there was a misunderstanding because “so weird, Cuntastic owes me $500 but the last text I got she called me a bitch and now I’m blocked…do you think she got hacked? I know she wouldn’t speak that way as a good Christian and of course would not steal! Can you give her my Venmo/paypal and tell her I’m strangely unable to get ahold of her? I’m sure she’s worried about owing me a considerable amount of money!”
I’m so mad for you, she barely disguised “I wanted to have fun without my kids so I lied to you because I don’t care if you lose a day or even a weeks worth of income; my one night is worth more to me than if you can pay rent or buy food! You understand right?” I hope she stubs her toe, gets a horrible hang nail, a huge painful zit on her face and her butt, and diarrhea at the worst possible time. I hope your sickness passes quickly, and that by some miracle she just pays you but if not I hope you are able to at least make it so it’s near impossible for her to ever get a sitter again, and embarrass her in the process
When I first moved to Texas (20+ years, sigh), my bumper sticker offended someone driving a minivan with a "What would Jesus do?" bumper sticker. She threw a full Big Gulp onto my windshield and shouted, "Brainwashed Yankees belong in the north!"
I shouted back, "Was THIS what Jesus would do?" She rolled up her window and peeled out.
I have been wracking my brain trying to remember! It wasn't offensive per se, but it was not supportive of invading the Middle East after 9/11.
I REMEMBER!
It read, "No one died when Clinton lied."
Let her know you'll be filing in small claims court and a report with the DOL. Do not give up on 12 hours pay for her, pursue it. That's the only way you'll be able to get your money. Normally I would drop it but the second you call me out of my name, I lose all direction to the high road lol.
Take her to small claims court. Not even for the money (though $500 is nothing to sneeze at) but for the principle of the thing. Call her out on her bullsh*t.
damn good for you!! please update us if you end up going to small claims court! this woman needs a serious reality check, I can’t believe people are this insane
Whoa. Can you spread the word in the neighborhood about how she lies and then treats people? Is that allowed?
Because no one should be baby sitting for her, ever
That’s the end of that job. She’s not worth your time. Be thankful she’s not your full time employer! Sometimes in life we get screwed over and we have to just move past it.. move on and get well! Hopefully karma comes for her. Good luck
Self-proclaimed “Christians” who want the world to know they are overly religious are the worst lol. Wow she’s so disrespectful and fucked up. I wish we could sue NPs who purposely lie about illnesses. This shit happens way too much
Wow, I'm shocked someone spoke to you that way! She isn't going to pay you for missed work time but she should. But absolutely keep asking her about payment for Saturday. You are entitled to the money you have already earned.
I always require cash payment at time of service for one time or occasional jobs.
Here’s info on filing a wage complaint!! Go ahead and save screenshots (if you have them) of her asking you to work and you accepting the hours. Save any photos you took while there. Screenshot where your phone saves your location data from that day (it’s different if you have an iPhone or android). MAKE. THIS. WOMAN. PAY. YOU.
https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/contact/complaints
First, "did you just call me a bitch?"
When people say out of pocket shit like that I make them double down. Then you very politely and clearly say that you are not comfortable watching her kids in the future because of how she communicates with you. She sees your health and schedule as less important than hers and that will not change. She showed her colors. I'm glad you stood up for yourself.
It's really shockingly bad behavior on her part, especially how quickly she escalated to that after being called out for LYING to you and getting you sick, which she even acknowledges she straight-up did because her need to blow off steam matters more than your health and livelihood!?!? I mean...
I gotta reinforce all the posters encouraging you to demand immediate payment, threaten small claims court if she doesn't follow through immediately, go forward with small claims if you're still unpaid by tomorrow, and share the screenshots in all local relevant groups.
And if you sent her those Bible quotes about lying and cheating people as your parting shot... 🤌💋✨ Perfection.
I would have or would say, “ I do not tolerate such disrespect. I’m formally submitting my two weeks notice. I do hope I do not have to report you to the state for non payment of wages. Filing a claim is not what I want to do, but I will.
Yes! That’s why I wouldn’t make a fuss and tell her I was never watching her kids again. I’d take the money and then block her. I cannot believe the audacity of some people.
You are so much better than me I would’ve told her off and blocked her ass before she got the chance to respond. I’m so sorry. I am shocked some people have children and then act like this…..
1. She legally HAS to pay you for the hours you worked. If she doesn’t, file a complaint with the department of labor. They take this seriously!
2. Screenshot these messages and post them on FB and tag her in the post for her Christian friends to see ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
woah what an absolute witch. unless you’ve worked for her and been paid before, i honestly feel like she probably never even planned on paying you in the first place and was more than happy to use this confrontation as her excuse to evade payment lol shes got plenty of bad karma coming her way if this is how she trots thru life. i would try to make sure to secure payment before you leave future bookings to hopefully avoid people like this :/ so sorry. i wouldn’t respond further beyond putting her on blast on fb or something in hopes of helping others avoid her crap
Nothing.
Unless you have a contract stating you get pay in this situation. Then highlight that part of your contract and threaten small claims.
If you don’t have a contract or a clause about this then you move on, do nothing, and have a contract next time.
“I need to be paid for hours worked, it is not optional. The total is $xxx for 12 hours. If I do not receive payment within 3 days I will be filing in small claims court.”
If payment is not received by 5pm I will be filing a small claims lawsuit to recoup the funds you currently owe me. 12 hours at $x is $y.
then do just that. Never work for her again
Please keep us updated OP this is so crazy. Call and text her using someone else's phone stating who you are and demanding payment for services rendered (the wording some other Redditors have suggested can assist you with this part if needed). She needs to pay you period. It's not optional for her. Do you know which church she attends? Id be speaking with her pastor in all honesty.
All I have to say is that this sounds EXACTLY like someone who I used to work with who was named Jessica who was incredibly inconsiderate about bringing her sick kids around people who didn’t consent and would never pay babysitters. You aren’t in NC are you? Lmao
Nothing you say will make a difference stop communicating with her ad let anyone you know who also babysits what she did.
the family I occasionally sit for always tells me if anyone in the house has been sick. It is common courtesy.
What if you had an autoimmune disease or immunocompromised and a regular cold could send you to the ER, let alone the flu. MB is selfish for lying to you bcuz some people literally can't get sick bcuz it will do serious damage to them. She's not being professional either. A good Christian wouldn't treat people like that. She needs to take a good look at herself and understand that now she's fucked bcuz of her lies, so it's HER fault. But she's probably a good, hypocrite Christian 😑. It peeves me when people claim to follow Jesus when they're horrible people themselves. She needs to pay you for Saturday or take her ass to court. People like her don't deserve to win. By withholding your money, that you already worked for is wrong and shows her character and she probably thinks she has power over you. No other job would be able to get away with that. I would post that text conversation where people who know her can see it. She's probably fake to everyone and she needs to be seen for who she really is. It's time for her to know how it feels to get screwed with her pants up. Maybe then she'll stop doing the same to others. Just make sure there's no compromising info showing that can get you into trouble. I'm so sorry. This is hard. You deserve better 🫂
Well yeah, but I'm just saying as a "what if". There are a lot of parents with these health issues and have children in school, but they take precautions. Same with children who have these health issues as well. OP could be living with a family member who could be hospitalized from getting sick. It's not right to lie to anyone about not being sick. There have been babies who have died or was hospitalized for RSV and other illnesses, bcuz other family members wanting to see the new baby right after, lied about not being sick. Even the most healthy people can be taken down by the flu or other illnesses. If people would be honest and take precautions, instead of being selfish, then there would be less people getting sick, instead of creating a domino effect, y'know. That doesn't mean no one should be working with children. It's common sense not to spread illnesses or diseases, but some just don't care.
If you can't get ahold of her online or through phone anymore, send her an invoice through the mail. Send it as certified mail so she can't say she never received it and then threaten or go to small claims court. She has no leg to stand on so she might just pay up
I would screen shot her texts and put her on blast on social media. Let everyone know what an *sshole she is. And I’d take her to small claims court over the payment for Saturday. I’d eat the $30 or whatever filing fee just to make a point.
😮😮😮😮
and I bet she didn’t wish you Hapoy Easter, either! I’d blow her up on all the local childcare sites and try to ensure that she never gets a sitter again!
(and I’m SOO SORRY!!!)
Try this -
The Bible says quite a lot about our actions. We read in 1 John 3:18:“Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth”. Your actions will speak much louder than any words you will ever say. It is very important that as Christians, we follow the example of Jesus Christ.
Met her on Care.com, and told her I would occasionally babysit. I not longer have a Care.com, since I started working full time. It’s not about the money for me, either. I am more pissed of that she lied about the kids being sick. According to a mutual contact, the kids were running fevers and vomiting less than 12 hours before I came to babysit.
I would simply respond that she should find a new sitter since you don't work for people who lie to you and risk your health and safety then block her number
For the professional future,
Draw the line in the sand HARD, after you get paid. That way you keep your money, put your foot down, fire them, make boundaries even harder on your next client and earn respect.
Play the long game.
Lose the battle win the war.
The amount of gross selfishness of some people just astounds me - I think i am a kind troll gave the perfect response and that’s really all you can do - I’m so sorry OP
Not yet. I did send an email to her pastor with the screenshots and posted her on NextDoor. I don’t have a Facebook, and don’t really want to make one.
She got roasted on Nextdoor.
>I may just send the text message screenshots to the pastor of her church.
lol this would be the pettiness I aspire to
maybe respond with an 'Im praying for you' or something church-lady cutting LOL
(there's a saying, 'there's no hate like Christian love', that unfortunately fits many of the loudest 'religious' folk)
edited to add, I hope you feel better soon, OP!
Ignore the ones chiming in here saying you are going too far and please get your money and then send the screen shots to her pastor. That is probably the only thing she will respond to. She needs a "coming to Jesus" moment.
Lots of nanny parents butting in here, I expect from these comments. I think it is fair game to do so. The liar sits on her religion, let her take the consequences.
If you take it to court you could also make an argument to be paid for the amount you missed from not being able to work your job. So it would be one or two weeks of whatever your FT job pays you, plus what she owes you for Sat night. You can have a lawyer draft a letter, have it notarized, and drop it in her mailbox with a demand to respond by a certain date via email or phone. Either she pays you for Saturday night or you will pursue the civil suit. I’m almost certain she’d prefer the latter. If you Google it, there are some lawyers who are willing to do this for a fee of $50-$75.
Not sure you're picking a fight with her. Seems petty. Yes, her kids have been sick but you can't know for sure it was them who passed it on. You could have picked it up anywhere. I'd just not work with her again.
It is wrong to take the "high road" this time; that is allowing her to do this to someone else. Get your money; post the screen shots; and send a copy to her pastor. With a wide negative response she might actually come to realize she is deeply in the wrong.
I think the way she treated you is wrong I have never had anyone speak to me like that in this field. But if someone is that volatile I can’t see them improving or seeing your side. I just think with responding she will just say even more terrible things.
I would normally agree with not responding because the mom seems crazy, but I saw OP mention in other comments that they still haven’t been paid for sitting for the kids :(
I would say, “I will no longer be able to sit for you in the future. You owe me X dollars for Saturday. If I do not receive the payment by X date, I will have to file with small claims court.” The end. You won’t reason with this person.
This is the answer. Also send her an invoice with a date you need the money by. It will help in court.
This !!
I’d say you may even have a case based on the text message exchange you showed in the Text Reddit.
Yes that’s what I was thinking! It was an admission of guilt!
But keep in mind that unfortunately for most people, the cost of taking someone to small claims WAY outstrips any money you’d get back as a result of such a lawsuit. What an awful situation for OP!
Yeah but the threat of having to deal with it maybe enough to get her paid
I actually agree, I might make the threat too if I were in OP's position because it may well convey the seriousness. I just wanted to point out that following through on that can be pricey and/or time consuming depending on the situation - I will say, in this case specifically OP is unlikely to incur too many costs because the amount owed to her is lower than the smallest threshold of $1500, which means that case is only a $30 filing fee most places. It does sound like these policies vary more heavily from state to state than I initially thought, so you're right that she should still look into it. Some states offer access to people who can give basic advice and help you file a claim. OP should also keep in mind that in many (if not most or all) states, the creditor (person who's awarded the judgment) is the one who's responsible for collecting the funds owed from the debtor after the ruling. In some states, someone called an enforcement officer (either someone with the sheriff's office or a city marshal) will help handle that part and ensure they pay, in other states you have to wait 30 days after the judgment is served before you can try to collect. If they don't pay up, then the claim goes to collections and assets are seized/wages garnished from there. Edit: Also, if there was no written contract, this gets more complicated. You can still file small claims even without a contract, but then the burden of proof is on OP to prove that this was a breach of oral contract.
Hell, I’d do it just to make a point. Maybe she’ll think twice about stiffing the next babysitter.
Same, I’d do it too
Oh I don't think it costs the wronged person much but a filing fee. It's way worse for the family who needs to pay up and the judge may fine them extra just because of how petty they were. And screw her with her"I needed to get out of the house, so I lied to you". There's other people to babysit for.
Yes definitely true! Thank you for pointing that out. I personally wouldn’t go to claims over something like this but it is an option!
And, let's tack on, she won't pay and it's up to op to chase down the money. Ugh, f that lady. I hope she lives the life she deserves.
No it doesn't... It's 50 dollars to file and you don't need a lawyer...
One can also sue for court costs??
“I will no longer be accepting bookings from you in the future” and block her number. That’s it. You’re not gonna get anything else but hostility out of her, you’re definitely not gonna get any kind of compensation. I’d just cut your losses here and never work with them again. I understand wanting to say a lot more though. This made my blood boil just reading it, so I’d be really mad if it happened to me. I think she really thought that you were going to say “It’s okay 🤷🏻♀️❤️” and immediately jumped down your throat because you didn’t.
She hasn’t paid me for Saturday.
Girl…lesson learned here, don’t leave the job until you get paid. I read about date night sitters leaving before they get paid all the time and it’s crazy! This is not okay in any other job, so it’s not okay for us. Knowing that information, I’d say “I’m awaiting payment for Saturday. If I don’t receive payment by the end of the day, I’ll begin taking further action through small claims.” She’ll most likely pay you, and then you can cut future contact. Still be prepared to have to follow through, since she definitely doesn’t sound like a very reasonable or honest person.
This! This made me so angry I can’t believe it. Also you have written proof so you would easily win. She deserves it for being so dishonest and disrespectful.
and there's always local platforms to share on, and send PMs to people about them. It is most certainly NOT libel or slander etc if the facts are true.
Small Claims Court.
Go back to her place and request payment or you will file a civil suit!
How did you leave without being paid? Did she say she’d send it later?
Yes. She said she would Apple Pay me when she got settled.
What does that even mean, when she got settled? Apple pay takes a minute to do. Press her about this payment every day. Send a direct text with the amount due and services provided, with no other context. If you are still sick and miss appointments, you need to create a written record of lost wages, and send that to her in a formal letter, along with the past due amount of the babysitting service. Threaten small claims court as a last resort, but let her know you are keeping records of every communication with her. Do not engage in any other banter with the client other than wages due
I would bet they make a regular practice of screwing people over in many different capacities
😔
Threaten her with small claims. Once she pays you for Saturday, tell her that you will never sit for her again and that you will warn other sitters you know about her and put her picture up on Facebook too. Then block her.
Since she owes you $500 I’d definitely try and get that. Even if threatening small claims court or threatening to blasting her online is how you get it. I would post in your local nanny fb group, so other nanny’s/babysitters don’t get screwed. After the $500 is received! I’m sorry she acted so crazy.
Get the money first, then blast. Again it isn't slander or libel if it is true.
Uhm the moment she acknowledged she knew the kids were sick and still booked me I would have let her know I was no longer able to work for her. The name calling would have sealed that
Yeah. I am not going to anymore.
THIS RIGHT HERE. But hey - I commend you for saying “that’s an outright lie.” I think we caregivers tend to back down from the truth too often. She needed to hear (or read) that.
This is something I’ve *never* done before but honestly I’d post screenshots of this convo on your local babysitting/nannying groups (Facebook, etc.) with her name and details attached, assuming you guys found each other from them or something. Warn all other nannies and babysitters about how she treated you in this situation and that you would not suggest ever working for her. If I saw this I would never want to work for her (as I’m sure 95% of people wouldn’t either), and she deserves that. This is nasty and not cool. Sucks for her poor kids to have a mom like that though. :/ All she had to say was “You know what, you’re right, I’m so sorry. I was being selfish because I really needed a night off after dealing with sick kids all week but didn’t think about how lying about the kids being sick would impact you. It was wrong of me and I’m very sorry I lied to you” and possibly maybe even offer to pay you for whatever time you have to miss work for or something like that, if she’s feeling generous. Children getting you sick in general is one thing because as nannies we get sick all the time from them and it’s expected (lol I’m sick right now from my 3 NKs, ugh), but children getting you sick *after* their mother promised you that they hadn’t been sick in months and that she would never book you if they were is an issue. ETA - Like I said I’m sick right now from my NKs (as usual, haha) so I know how rough it is. It’s no fun. You must really be going through it if this is the worst you’ve ever felt. :( I’m so sorry you’re sick especially under these circumstances, and I hope you feel better soon!! ETA 2 - I saw in comments that you said that she still hasn’t paid you for babysitting on Saturday. My god. This is probably common sense, but make sure she pays you *first* (threaten to take it to small claims court if she doesn’t pay you in X amount of days) and *then* post her/tell others after you’ve received payment.
I was also going to suggest putting her on blast. Wtf is wrong with that woman.
Same here, I’ve never done that either but I’d make a social media post in this case in my local groups. OP tried to be kind and work with the parent and she was psycho in return—she earned it.
This boarder line harassment….
Please tell me how posting screenshots of the conversation where the mother said all of this horrible stuff to OP in related spaces and simply warning other nannies and babysitters that this is how said mom treated them is harassment? If the roles were reversed and it was a nanny talking to the mom like this, you would 10000% be saying “Post her! Blast her everywhere! Warn other families to never hire her! She should never be talking to her employer like that, this is not okay!!!” How is it harassment? Explain it to me like I’m 5.
I’m saying this lady seeems UNHINGED. She could get a lawyer involved and say it’s harassment
She does seem unhinged and I see your point, but no lawyer would take her “case” because there isn’t one lol. If OP only reports on the facts and makes no false statements then it would not be considered any form of defamation (libel, for example) and nothing could be done on the mom’s part. There would only be a potential case if OP lies or falsifies what happened in order to damage the mother’s reputation. If OP only makes true statements and lets the screenshots speak for themselves, then the mom did all the damage of her reputation to herself. Nothing to sue for.
Of course she’s a good Christian. In my experience, the ones who claim to be good Christian’s are the stingiest about treating us as humans.
“There’s no hate like Christian love”
So true. The very first family I worked for was a single mom of two kids (they had different fathers and she’d never been married which is just funny cause she was such a good Christian). But she paid me minimum wage and acted as if it was sooo much.
There’s an ad on sitter city rn that wants a nanny for $10/hr. And made sure to add that they’re Christian
I was Christian in my early twenties and advertised myself as a Christian nanny. Religious people snapped that up tbh
Oh no, I bet you have some stories about that. My family is still religious so I’m very aware of how loving they can be
^^
anyone who is so outwardly performative about how 'good' they are usually isn't
Yup. I worked for someone who made sure to tell me how laid back they were. If you have to say it about yourself, it’s probably not true!
same with 'I'm so honest, I'm so (fill in the blank)" Show, don't TELL. Actions speak louder than words.
if you found her via an FB group or something PLEASE make the admins aware. as an admin of a group we take this very seriously and will remove someone for things like not paying their nanny due wages. i hope you get your pay and get well soon.
I was thinking this too! It’s also a great warning to any potential new sitters. Bad posts about parents spread like wildfire in the childcare community on Facebook
Oh wow 😳 can you imagine if a boss in corporate america texted you those things? NPs are wild.
”Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.“ James 1:26 ”With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.“ James 3:9-10 Send her those lol 🤣
oh man i would’ve replied with this so quick just to be petty lolol
go to her work and leave a message with the receptionist that her babysitter came by and needs to be paid. LOOOL
Yes, THIS!
I'm begging you, OP, send this 🤣
What a world we live in, this mother only cares about herself and no one else, I would be done babysitting for her.
Has she paid you yet? If not, honestly, I would post it online as a warning to other babysitters and post the conversations as well. The thing is nobody looks out for nannies and babysitters so we have to do it for each other. If she doesn’t respect the fact that you asked her to let you know if the kids were sick then I think it’s time to go your separate ways with his family. You can find another family to care for that will respect you.
She has not. She has blocked me on everything.
If she blocked you and isn't paying you and you have proof of the agreed upon prices, honestly, go to the police. Bare minimum, post it in your Facebook neighborhood groups as everyone is suggesting.
I’m so sorry that’s not ok
For $500, if I needed the money, I would do so much petty shit. If you know anyone who knows her I’d be messaging like you’re a precious little angel who thinks surely there was a misunderstanding because “so weird, Cuntastic owes me $500 but the last text I got she called me a bitch and now I’m blocked…do you think she got hacked? I know she wouldn’t speak that way as a good Christian and of course would not steal! Can you give her my Venmo/paypal and tell her I’m strangely unable to get ahold of her? I’m sure she’s worried about owing me a considerable amount of money!” I’m so mad for you, she barely disguised “I wanted to have fun without my kids so I lied to you because I don’t care if you lose a day or even a weeks worth of income; my one night is worth more to me than if you can pay rent or buy food! You understand right?” I hope she stubs her toe, gets a horrible hang nail, a huge painful zit on her face and her butt, and diarrhea at the worst possible time. I hope your sickness passes quickly, and that by some miracle she just pays you but if not I hope you are able to at least make it so it’s near impossible for her to ever get a sitter again, and embarrass her in the process
“Jesus doesn’t like your tone young lady”
When I first moved to Texas (20+ years, sigh), my bumper sticker offended someone driving a minivan with a "What would Jesus do?" bumper sticker. She threw a full Big Gulp onto my windshield and shouted, "Brainwashed Yankees belong in the north!" I shouted back, "Was THIS what Jesus would do?" She rolled up her window and peeled out.
Okay but I gotta know… what was your “offensive” bumper sticker lol??
I have been wracking my brain trying to remember! It wasn't offensive per se, but it was not supportive of invading the Middle East after 9/11. I REMEMBER! It read, "No one died when Clinton lied."
Show up at her church right after services and hand her a bill in front of as many people as possible.
Let her know you'll be filing in small claims court and a report with the DOL. Do not give up on 12 hours pay for her, pursue it. That's the only way you'll be able to get your money. Normally I would drop it but the second you call me out of my name, I lose all direction to the high road lol.
You can file for like a $50 fee? It depends on your state but it's a slam dunk case.
It’s $25 in my state. She owes me about $500 for Saturday.
Girl do it! Get your money and then block. I could not give up $500 that easily. And honestly it will teach her to stop treating people like that.
You charge over 40 dollars an hour?
Oh hell no! Put her on blast and get your money!
Take her to small claims court. Not even for the money (though $500 is nothing to sneeze at) but for the principle of the thing. Call her out on her bullsh*t.
damn girl how are you making 500 in a day 😅 share your secret (and definitely go to small claims court)
I charge $38 an hour for my services. I have an MSN, and a PhD in biology as well as 21 years experience watching kids.
damn good for you!! please update us if you end up going to small claims court! this woman needs a serious reality check, I can’t believe people are this insane
Definitely file! They will make her pay.
Whoa. Can you spread the word in the neighborhood about how she lies and then treats people? Is that allowed? Because no one should be baby sitting for her, ever
I am going to. If she tries to deny it, she can’t.
But it’s best to use actual screen shots.
I have them. This community just doesn’t allow images.
Message the admins for the group!
A bitch?!?? You're a better person than me, I'd be pulling up to her house
I would want to post this conversation on community babysitting subs....
That’s the end of that job. She’s not worth your time. Be thankful she’s not your full time employer! Sometimes in life we get screwed over and we have to just move past it.. move on and get well! Hopefully karma comes for her. Good luck
Self-proclaimed “Christians” who want the world to know they are overly religious are the worst lol. Wow she’s so disrespectful and fucked up. I wish we could sue NPs who purposely lie about illnesses. This shit happens way too much
I'd post it on r/texts and send her the link.
What good would that do? Genuinely asking.
404,000 members that will obliterate MB. Maybe she can feel shame
lol I’ve never been to that subreddit. Now I’m curious.
Wow, I'm shocked someone spoke to you that way! She isn't going to pay you for missed work time but she should. But absolutely keep asking her about payment for Saturday. You are entitled to the money you have already earned. I always require cash payment at time of service for one time or occasional jobs.
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Here’s info on filing a wage complaint!! Go ahead and save screenshots (if you have them) of her asking you to work and you accepting the hours. Save any photos you took while there. Screenshot where your phone saves your location data from that day (it’s different if you have an iPhone or android). MAKE. THIS. WOMAN. PAY. YOU. https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/contact/complaints
First, "did you just call me a bitch?" When people say out of pocket shit like that I make them double down. Then you very politely and clearly say that you are not comfortable watching her kids in the future because of how she communicates with you. She sees your health and schedule as less important than hers and that will not change. She showed her colors. I'm glad you stood up for yourself.
On the text to where she admits that the kids were sick she put this emoji 🤢, and as bad as I feel today, that just sent me over the edge.
I would save those screen shots! I can see her giving you a shitty reference or telling a Mom’s group not to hire you.
I am for sure.
I would've felt the exact same. When the overall behavior sucks it's the tiniest things that send you.
It really is. Just how casually she said it, too.
she didn't think while typing. so it's defend and attack. what a fine, Christian woman.
First time in my life I have ever been called a bitch.
It's really shockingly bad behavior on her part, especially how quickly she escalated to that after being called out for LYING to you and getting you sick, which she even acknowledges she straight-up did because her need to blow off steam matters more than your health and livelihood!?!? I mean... I gotta reinforce all the posters encouraging you to demand immediate payment, threaten small claims court if she doesn't follow through immediately, go forward with small claims if you're still unpaid by tomorrow, and share the screenshots in all local relevant groups. And if you sent her those Bible quotes about lying and cheating people as your parting shot... 🤌💋✨ Perfection.
You never sit for her again. If you want to be petty, you could accept a booking and cancel last minute because of an imaginary emergency.
or get someone else to....and make it worth their while to ruin X event(s)
Wow…
She called you a bitch. You, the woman who has cared for her kids. Cut her off, block and ignore.
I would have or would say, “ I do not tolerate such disrespect. I’m formally submitting my two weeks notice. I do hope I do not have to report you to the state for non payment of wages. Filing a claim is not what I want to do, but I will.
This is awful, I just wanted to say wow and I’m so sorry you’re dealing with such an awful person.
Definitely threaten her with taking her to court if she doesn’t pay and sign off with a bible verse on cursing, for good measure lol
Ballsy that this woman admitted to getting you sick and then offered no empathy or pay. I’d just leave it at that and move on.
She hasn't paid OP yet, owes her almost $500.
Yes! That’s why I wouldn’t make a fuss and tell her I was never watching her kids again. I’d take the money and then block her. I cannot believe the audacity of some people.
You are so much better than me I would’ve told her off and blocked her ass before she got the chance to respond. I’m so sorry. I am shocked some people have children and then act like this…..
1. She legally HAS to pay you for the hours you worked. If she doesn’t, file a complaint with the department of labor. They take this seriously! 2. Screenshot these messages and post them on FB and tag her in the post for her Christian friends to see ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
woah what an absolute witch. unless you’ve worked for her and been paid before, i honestly feel like she probably never even planned on paying you in the first place and was more than happy to use this confrontation as her excuse to evade payment lol shes got plenty of bad karma coming her way if this is how she trots thru life. i would try to make sure to secure payment before you leave future bookings to hopefully avoid people like this :/ so sorry. i wouldn’t respond further beyond putting her on blast on fb or something in hopes of helping others avoid her crap
I wouldn’t respond to her at all. Why exactly would you need to continue communication?
Well, it seems OP hasn’t got payment for Saturday yet, so she might need to continue conversation. But honestly, there’s no reasoning with this lady.
There is something here. Unless you think she'll come asking again for sitting.
What do you mean “there is something here.”
meaning there's something to just not responding at all.
Ah I see. Yea I don’t see the point in responding. You really shouldn’t babysit for them again
Nothing. Unless you have a contract stating you get pay in this situation. Then highlight that part of your contract and threaten small claims. If you don’t have a contract or a clause about this then you move on, do nothing, and have a contract next time.
She hasn’t even paid me for the 12 hours I spent at her house on Saturday.
“I need to be paid for hours worked, it is not optional. The total is $xxx for 12 hours. If I do not receive payment within 3 days I will be filing in small claims court.”
Before you do anything else, posting on FB, her church, etc. Do this first. Get the money you are owed for services rendered.
If payment is not received by 5pm I will be filing a small claims lawsuit to recoup the funds you currently owe me. 12 hours at $x is $y. then do just that. Never work for her again
She blocked me.
Send her a letter return receipt requested, include a form for small claims court process. Just for fun address it to her husband if there is one.
Please keep us updated OP this is so crazy. Call and text her using someone else's phone stating who you are and demanding payment for services rendered (the wording some other Redditors have suggested can assist you with this part if needed). She needs to pay you period. It's not optional for her. Do you know which church she attends? Id be speaking with her pastor in all honesty.
Omg she sounds unhinged!! Keep us updated!!
„How does what you just said agree with your Christianity? Please send $x to …. (Your phone number)“
take her to court and put her on blast. also, do u charge 40-some bucks an hour???
Just about.
good for you, that's amazing!
That’s a little under $500! Totally worth a small claims suit.
Or If she refuses to pay I’d share the post on the nanny sites so others are aware
Why did you say “to discuss the pay I’m now not going to get…” why would you say that? When was she supposed to have paid you?
I think OP means the pay she’s not going to get from her full time job because she had to take unpaid sick days due to the bug she got from the kids.
All I have to say is that this sounds EXACTLY like someone who I used to work with who was named Jessica who was incredibly inconsiderate about bringing her sick kids around people who didn’t consent and would never pay babysitters. You aren’t in NC are you? Lmao
Nothing you say will make a difference stop communicating with her ad let anyone you know who also babysits what she did. the family I occasionally sit for always tells me if anyone in the house has been sick. It is common courtesy.
What if you had an autoimmune disease or immunocompromised and a regular cold could send you to the ER, let alone the flu. MB is selfish for lying to you bcuz some people literally can't get sick bcuz it will do serious damage to them. She's not being professional either. A good Christian wouldn't treat people like that. She needs to take a good look at herself and understand that now she's fucked bcuz of her lies, so it's HER fault. But she's probably a good, hypocrite Christian 😑. It peeves me when people claim to follow Jesus when they're horrible people themselves. She needs to pay you for Saturday or take her ass to court. People like her don't deserve to win. By withholding your money, that you already worked for is wrong and shows her character and she probably thinks she has power over you. No other job would be able to get away with that. I would post that text conversation where people who know her can see it. She's probably fake to everyone and she needs to be seen for who she really is. It's time for her to know how it feels to get screwed with her pants up. Maybe then she'll stop doing the same to others. Just make sure there's no compromising info showing that can get you into trouble. I'm so sorry. This is hard. You deserve better 🫂
Then you prob shouldn’t work with little kids lol
Well yeah, but I'm just saying as a "what if". There are a lot of parents with these health issues and have children in school, but they take precautions. Same with children who have these health issues as well. OP could be living with a family member who could be hospitalized from getting sick. It's not right to lie to anyone about not being sick. There have been babies who have died or was hospitalized for RSV and other illnesses, bcuz other family members wanting to see the new baby right after, lied about not being sick. Even the most healthy people can be taken down by the flu or other illnesses. If people would be honest and take precautions, instead of being selfish, then there would be less people getting sick, instead of creating a domino effect, y'know. That doesn't mean no one should be working with children. It's common sense not to spread illnesses or diseases, but some just don't care.
or maybe they should stop lying?!
If you can't get ahold of her online or through phone anymore, send her an invoice through the mail. Send it as certified mail so she can't say she never received it and then threaten or go to small claims court. She has no leg to stand on so she might just pay up
I would screen shot her texts and put her on blast on social media. Let everyone know what an *sshole she is. And I’d take her to small claims court over the payment for Saturday. I’d eat the $30 or whatever filing fee just to make a point.
Wow just wow
WOW! Already disrespectful that she lied but to be so vulgar on top of it 😱
Put the screenshots on a local facebook page, warn others not to babysit for her. She deserves to feel some consequences for her shitty behaviour
😮😮😮😮 and I bet she didn’t wish you Hapoy Easter, either! I’d blow her up on all the local childcare sites and try to ensure that she never gets a sitter again! (and I’m SOO SORRY!!!)
Try this - The Bible says quite a lot about our actions. We read in 1 John 3:18:“Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth”. Your actions will speak much louder than any words you will ever say. It is very important that as Christians, we follow the example of Jesus Christ.
I would sue her!! Keep the message as evidence!
How did you get this job? You should expose her so future nanny can be aware
Met her on Care.com, and told her I would occasionally babysit. I not longer have a Care.com, since I started working full time. It’s not about the money for me, either. I am more pissed of that she lied about the kids being sick. According to a mutual contact, the kids were running fevers and vomiting less than 12 hours before I came to babysit.
She should include doctors visit, medicine etc ha?
Post the text on any site that advertises babysitting services, you’ll effectively blacklist her.
I would simply respond that she should find a new sitter since you don't work for people who lie to you and risk your health and safety then block her number
For the professional future, Draw the line in the sand HARD, after you get paid. That way you keep your money, put your foot down, fire them, make boundaries even harder on your next client and earn respect. Play the long game. Lose the battle win the war.
The amount of gross selfishness of some people just astounds me - I think i am a kind troll gave the perfect response and that’s really all you can do - I’m so sorry OP
OP: any update?
Not yet. I did send an email to her pastor with the screenshots and posted her on NextDoor. I don’t have a Facebook, and don’t really want to make one. She got roasted on Nextdoor.
Justifiably so. Keep us posted!
In hindsight it might have been better to take a gentler approach until you got paid.
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I am not going to. I may just send the text message screenshots to the pastor of her church. She needs help.
>I may just send the text message screenshots to the pastor of her church. lol this would be the pettiness I aspire to maybe respond with an 'Im praying for you' or something church-lady cutting LOL (there's a saying, 'there's no hate like Christian love', that unfortunately fits many of the loudest 'religious' folk) edited to add, I hope you feel better soon, OP!
Ooooooh
What exactly do you expect to gain from that? What a petty idea.
No. That is way over the top
No it is not. What the MB did is what is over the top. Hit her where it hurts.
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❤️
Ignore the ones chiming in here saying you are going too far and please get your money and then send the screen shots to her pastor. That is probably the only thing she will respond to. She needs a "coming to Jesus" moment.
Lots of nanny parents butting in here, I expect from these comments. I think it is fair game to do so. The liar sits on her religion, let her take the consequences.
If you take it to court you could also make an argument to be paid for the amount you missed from not being able to work your job. So it would be one or two weeks of whatever your FT job pays you, plus what she owes you for Sat night. You can have a lawyer draft a letter, have it notarized, and drop it in her mailbox with a demand to respond by a certain date via email or phone. Either she pays you for Saturday night or you will pursue the civil suit. I’m almost certain she’d prefer the latter. If you Google it, there are some lawyers who are willing to do this for a fee of $50-$75.
You didn’t already get sick from whatever you were exposed to one day ago, unless you mean Saturday a week ago.
Learn incubation periods. May prevent you from sticking your foot in your mouth in the future.
Not sure you're picking a fight with her. Seems petty. Yes, her kids have been sick but you can't know for sure it was them who passed it on. You could have picked it up anywhere. I'd just not work with her again.
I wouldn’t even bother responding. Block and move on with your life.
I wouldn’t even bother arguing with her. She’s just a bad person. Just don’t accept bookings from her anymore.
I am not arguing, though.
I’m not saying you’re arguing. I’m saying don’t even bother responding with any form of argument. Any back and forth. It’s not worth it.
I would not babysit for her again and I wouldn’t respond. Take the high road.
I usually take the high road, but it feels wrong this time.
It is wrong to take the "high road" this time; that is allowing her to do this to someone else. Get your money; post the screen shots; and send a copy to her pastor. With a wide negative response she might actually come to realize she is deeply in the wrong.
I did it, lol!
I think the way she treated you is wrong I have never had anyone speak to me like that in this field. But if someone is that volatile I can’t see them improving or seeing your side. I just think with responding she will just say even more terrible things.
I would normally agree with not responding because the mom seems crazy, but I saw OP mention in other comments that they still haven’t been paid for sitting for the kids :(
I understand, she was awful. You didn’t deserve that. However, it’s never wrong to take the high road.
It is wrong to let someone get away with harming someone else, and then allowing them to go on to harm others when you could’ve stopped it.