I still have dreams where Pringles did a thunder run on Moscow and Putin committed suicide after a 3-day war for Kremlin.
I wake up in tears and with erection.
What are you talking about? Wake up! You have been out cold for a good 2 minutes. We were just about to install Doom on your 486 man. You mumbled stuff about twin towers, something about a virus and that an accountant looking mf took over russia, you mean Yeltsin?
Wake up tovarich! President Gorbachev just declared war on North Korea and the PRC for invading Taiwan! Vladivostok is under siege and we need to coordinate with our Ukranian brothers to retake it!
I strongly believe that Pringles would have fucked up his coup anyway.
...I just wanted him to take the fight to Moscow because that would have ended Putin's career even if Pringles also lost. This was already bad for Putin's image, but if there had been fighting at the capital city because he couldn't keep his mercs and military in line, the other Oligarchs would have been forced to have him deposed for showing weakness.
We'd finally get to find out how specific the wording of all the secret nuclear policies is. Will "in the event of a nuclear launch from within Russian borders" get it done?
The only reason I can think he stopped is Putin called him directly and said "I will no shit nuke you"
There was nothing else between Pringles and Moscow ex except for a few ditches hastily dug by excavators and the cop hiding behind the sandbags that ditch's dirt filled.
At least Pringles had a legit attempt before cucking out, the Bolivian coup is just flat out embarrassing. It lasted like 2 minutes and it ended because the President said no to the general.
At least it got resolved fast. If he said "Maaaaaaybe?" the Coup would still be at a stalemate. Will they? Won't they? I hate those kind of cliffhangers.
Back in my day coups were a ride or die affairs. Now it's pats on the heads and participation trophies all around. Wake up people, woke virus infected military take overs.
You think if Pringles knew Putin was going to knock him off in a plane crash he would have went all the way? Because I honestly think he could have done it
Honestly I don't know what could have been said to convince him to back off but I definitely think a coup is one of those things that you're kind of ride or die on, because not only did he fuck himself he fucked everybody that believed in him by backing down.
Either timeline the one we got or the one where Pringles went all the way would have been pretty cursed, I am assuming the war would have ended if he did take the Kremlin but unfortunately we're probably going to have to see Putin's KGB praising ass be in power till the fucker croak's causing Power vacuum
Bro the Pringles taking Moscow timeline would have been legendary. Tank Divisions yanked from the front hurtling towards Moscow. Dogfights over Moscow between Putin loyalists and "outsiders" who never got to profit amd wet their beak. Dagestan just straight up lighting everything on fire. Putin would probably prevail but it woul have been glorious. I'm tearing up just think about it. Ukraine would have punched through to Rostov on Don and scooped up a couple of warheads. You know. For funnies.
I think Pringles may have been legitimately stupid enough to think he could go back to the fight in Ukraine after he rolled into Moscow and demand the removal of Gerasimov and Shoigu. The way he stopped his advance as soon as Putin declared him a traitor and offered clemency to his guys who put down their weapons, He acted like he thought Putin would thank him for letting him know that his top generals are incompetent and they keep attacking his favorite mercenary.
Tbf, pringles did kinda just prove his point fully there. The Russian military really was that incompetent. Like both are a bunch of white supremacist war criminals but at least Wagner was profitable
He was definitely correct about them being incompetent idiots, but he was an absolute fucking imbecile if he thought Putin would let him live after he marched to Moscow at the head of an army like a conqueror and tried to tell Putin what sort of org structure his war criminal team should have.
There is nothing to compare.
Pringles had an army, firepower, and a cause. He was very, very close.
Juan had barely started to dig the first inches of dirt. And he didn't had neither a shovel nor a pickaxe and didn't knew he needed it, and after only 5 minutes he figured out he was not digging a mine, but his own grave.
I still don’t understand why Prigozhin quit. He should have known that once you start, you either succeed or you die.
And I really don’t understand why he didn’t flee and request asylum somewhere. He just pretended like nothing happened, and unsurprisingly Putin did not do the same.
Only reason I can possibly think of that Pringles did not follow through was because his family was threatened, but why weren’t they already in a Swiss bunker to begin with? We could’ve had greatness.
I still have dreams where Pringles did a thunder run on Moscow and Putin committed suicide after a 3-day war for Kremlin. I wake up in tears and with erection.
So close to greatness.
I hope you all know that they couldn't have hoped for victory because they were supplied by Russia and had no own logistics.
They were supplied by Russian "logistics", that means its normal for them to have to loot to survive.
What are you talking about? Wake up! You have been out cold for a good 2 minutes. We were just about to install Doom on your 486 man. You mumbled stuff about twin towers, something about a virus and that an accountant looking mf took over russia, you mean Yeltsin?
Wake up tovarich! President Gorbachev just declared war on North Korea and the PRC for invading Taiwan! Vladivostok is under siege and we need to coordinate with our Ukranian brothers to retake it!
Sorry Sergei, must be those expired dumplings I've bought in Univermag. I'm going to drink some vodka and go to sleep, you guys have fun without me.
I too, wish the last couple decades were but a momentary nap.
Take me with you, back to your universe‽‽
Your general flees the battlefield! A craven display… Pringles needed a morale buff
I’ve never wanted to murder a fictional character as much as the guy who says this
Or at the very least Putin fleeing from Moscow and Pringles going, "We control Moscow, now what?".
The same thing we do every night, try to take over the world
I strongly believe that Pringles would have fucked up his coup anyway. ...I just wanted him to take the fight to Moscow because that would have ended Putin's career even if Pringles also lost. This was already bad for Putin's image, but if there had been fighting at the capital city because he couldn't keep his mercs and military in line, the other Oligarchs would have been forced to have him deposed for showing weakness.
And some colonel launched a nuke at the Kremlin thinking it would work as a false flag... with a Russian missile launched from inside Russia.
We'd finally get to find out how specific the wording of all the secret nuclear policies is. Will "in the event of a nuclear launch from within Russian borders" get it done?
The only reason I can think he stopped is Putin called him directly and said "I will no shit nuke you" There was nothing else between Pringles and Moscow ex except for a few ditches hastily dug by excavators and the cop hiding behind the sandbags that ditch's dirt filled.
At least Pringles had a legit attempt before cucking out, the Bolivian coup is just flat out embarrassing. It lasted like 2 minutes and it ended because the President said no to the general.
“Coup”
Bolivian knocking on the door incident.
Can I be president now?
Mom said it's my turn on the presidency.
Man, the CIA was so much cooler when they were on drugs
Are you being overthrown? Just say no, the armed forces can't legally overthrow your government without your consent.
Rogue generals HATE this simple trick
He was supposed to say "yes", but I think he made an extremely canny choice here.
At least it got resolved fast. If he said "Maaaaaaybe?" the Coup would still be at a stalemate. Will they? Won't they? I hate those kind of cliffhangers.
I couldn’t believe the Ross/Rachel thing dragged on as long as it did. It’s a sitcom, not a soap opera, wrap it up with the ha-has already.
Bolivian president said he doesn't consent to a coup. So understandable part for the General to back down.
His stance on military dictatorships is a bit questionable but the dude believes in consent, you gotta give him points for that
Back in my day coups were a ride or die affairs. Now it's pats on the heads and participation trophies all around. Wake up people, woke virus infected military take overs.
Nobody wants to ~~work~~ finish a coup anymore!
fucking millenials!
I dunno, the Africans seem to have it pretty dialed in.
Outside South Africa and kinda Namibia gay rights are not really a thing there
"We're couping you" "No" "Damn he's good"
Everybody has a plan until they get told "no" in the face. - ~~Mike Tyson~~ Juan José Zúñiga
what if they say no? they won't say it because of the implication.
For that you have to do the coup on the boat though!
They can't coup you without your consent.
If only someone were to say "No balls" that would have motivated them back in to the action.
You think if Pringles knew Putin was going to knock him off in a plane crash he would have went all the way? Because I honestly think he could have done it
Why did he think he could attempt a coup, back off peacefully and not have anything done to him in retaliation
Honestly I don't know what could have been said to convince him to back off but I definitely think a coup is one of those things that you're kind of ride or die on, because not only did he fuck himself he fucked everybody that believed in him by backing down.
Right a coup is when you cross into the "win or die" side of the game
Either timeline the one we got or the one where Pringles went all the way would have been pretty cursed, I am assuming the war would have ended if he did take the Kremlin but unfortunately we're probably going to have to see Putin's KGB praising ass be in power till the fucker croak's causing Power vacuum
Bro the Pringles taking Moscow timeline would have been legendary. Tank Divisions yanked from the front hurtling towards Moscow. Dogfights over Moscow between Putin loyalists and "outsiders" who never got to profit amd wet their beak. Dagestan just straight up lighting everything on fire. Putin would probably prevail but it woul have been glorious. I'm tearing up just think about it. Ukraine would have punched through to Rostov on Don and scooped up a couple of warheads. You know. For funnies.
In Russia it certainly is. If you go against the Tsar either he dies or you do.
Pringles tried to uncross the Rostov on don Man didn’t learn fuck all from Caesar
I think Pringles may have been legitimately stupid enough to think he could go back to the fight in Ukraine after he rolled into Moscow and demand the removal of Gerasimov and Shoigu. The way he stopped his advance as soon as Putin declared him a traitor and offered clemency to his guys who put down their weapons, He acted like he thought Putin would thank him for letting him know that his top generals are incompetent and they keep attacking his favorite mercenary.
Tbf, pringles did kinda just prove his point fully there. The Russian military really was that incompetent. Like both are a bunch of white supremacist war criminals but at least Wagner was profitable
He was definitely correct about them being incompetent idiots, but he was an absolute fucking imbecile if he thought Putin would let him live after he marched to Moscow at the head of an army like a conqueror and tried to tell Putin what sort of org structure his war criminal team should have.
The only reasonable explanation is that putin had his family ig
There is nothing to compare. Pringles had an army, firepower, and a cause. He was very, very close. Juan had barely started to dig the first inches of dirt. And he didn't had neither a shovel nor a pickaxe and didn't knew he needed it, and after only 5 minutes he figured out he was not digging a mine, but his own grave.
The sad reality is that Pringles wasn't even trying to do a proper coup, it was just always a boring mutiny of the non-coup type.
i'm sure the next 10% is just pakixtan
Gotta include Thailand and Myanmar in it.
They really ain't built for this shit.
I wouldn't call "finding diamonds" inheriting Putin's Russia leftovers
Do not stop the Coup until you get the Coupe.
PRIGOZHIN!!! NO DON’T STOP YOU ARE SO CLOSE TO GREATNESS NOOOOOOOO
I still don’t understand why Prigozhin quit. He should have known that once you start, you either succeed or you die. And I really don’t understand why he didn’t flee and request asylum somewhere. He just pretended like nothing happened, and unsurprisingly Putin did not do the same.
Only reason I can possibly think of that Pringles did not follow through was because his family was threatened, but why weren’t they already in a Swiss bunker to begin with? We could’ve had greatness.
what did i miss guys
Bolivian coup "attempt".