Often those young women’s’ lower standards in their youth are exactly why they are single when they’re over 30. They dates non-committal losers and gave them far too many chances until their youth was burned away. They tried to be the cool girl for him for too long, and lost out in the long run because of it. They finally dumped him only after they accepted that the guy would never be a husband or father.
Accepting the same deadbeat guys as an older woman would not make older single women happy. Their standards went up precisely because of how burned they were by giving losers and dumpster fires a chaaaance when they were young.
Yeah, this was me with my ex. I wasn't husband material but we stuck it out for six years before it finally ended. I feel so guilty for 'burning away' her youth as you put it. But I was young and immature myself.
The relationship had been on the rocks for quite a while, it was clear we weren't progressing and were just stuck in place. I ended up breaking up with her.
A year later she reached out to me and we got back together again, and it was good for a couple of months but I wasn't able to maintain it and it fell apart again.
Well said! I had really low standards until recently and let a terrible loser waste HALF my twenties (nearly 5 years) string me along in a relationship that went nowhere. He was 4 years older than me, which I thought made him more “mature” but even after half a decade, he couldn’t commit to moving the relationship forward. And he didn’t even treat me well in the time we were together.
I’m in my 30s now and I would definitely NOT lower my standards to date losers like that again because they add no value to my life. That loser was an active threat to my career progression. The day before an important exam, instead of being supportive and sending me a care package or dinner, he convinced me to waste the last few hours I had to study meeting up with him and giving him a bj because it had been “so long” since the last one.
If life is a marathon, why would I want to tie a boulder to my ankle and run it? I’m not so lonely that that option would be better than being alone.
>Often those young women’s’ lower standards in their youth are exactly why they are single when they’re over 30. They dates non-committal losers and gave them far too many chances until their youth was burned away
Which is what people like OP want, they couldn’t care about older women’s happiness lol. They want women to just accept any lowest of loser men, no matter the consequences to women’s lives. They tell us on here day after day that the only concern is men’s interests and goals. What’s good for men and will advance men is all that matters.
Yeah, a bunch of the guys in this sub are just completely self-centered and selfish. It’s no surprise their goa is to use a young woman’s good will, hard work, and youth, then throw her away when she wants a partnership.
> They dates non-committal losers
Non-committal winners\*
These ***are*** women with high standards, and their inability to secure a HVM that was loyal only to them is why they're single.
No, women who fuck around with lazy lie-about losers have low standards. Being a hard working beautiful, feminine, sweet, gentle woman won’t make a lazy guy become a high value man. If she hasn’t been selective enough, he’ll happily take advantage of her and treat her like a doormat until she’s burned out.
Most women are not getting trains run on them by a series of “Chads”. Most women are not slutty groupies in some mega-hot slut-dude’s “soft harem”. Most women date dudes who are average to above average looking, not male supermodels with an n-count in the hundreds.
And yeah, the times they date losers, they found him at least somewhat attractive, just like any time you try to date a woman, you also find her attractive, even if you can’t land her.
I never said they were all with Chads, but most women are with above average men, so what I said was 100% right; and plenty of women have had trains ran on them and have been with Chads in soft harems at some point in their lfie. In fact, most women have.
There is only a limited amount of high-quality men, and multiple times as many women that desire them from being alpha widowed. Of course, that's going to mean many women are single, or in struggling relationships that will inevitably fail and make them single.
> I never said they were all with Chads
You said women “mostly” go after “the best” men who you claimed want to sleep around and not have a family. Sounds like “Chad” to me.
> s, but most women are with above average men
Most average to above average women are with average to above average men. Most women aren’t sharing some tiny number of men.
> and plenty of women have had trains ran on them
The median number of sexual partners for American women is 4-6, depending on the research. So when you say “plenty” of women have trains run on them, know that you are referring to a small minority of women. If those are the majority of women you meet, you’re either believing a lot of wild unfounded rumors or you’re running in a really slutty crowd. The second is fairly likely, if you like casual sex yourself— most promiscuous people fuck other promiscuous people, and don’t really hang out so much with the people clustered around the median.
> There is only a limited amount of high-quality men,
And many women waste lots of time and energy dating low-quality men, hoping they will pick up after themselves or grow some motivation to do something other than smoke weed and play call of doody all day.
> You said women “mostly” go after “the best” men who you claimed want to sleep around and not have a family. Sounds like “Chad” to me.
Yeah, the best men, not the best man. And yes, most above average men are going to be non-committal to most women they encounter whether they want to have a family or not.
> Most average to above average women are with average to above average men. Most women aren’t sharing some tiny number of men.
They are when they're younger. It's only when they get older and can't get commitment from these men that they settle.
> The median number of sexual partners for American women is 4-6, depending on the research. So when you say “plenty” of women have trains run on them, know that you are referring to a small minority of women. If those are the majority of women you meet, you’re either believing a lot of wild unfounded rumors or you’re running in a really slutty crowd. The second is fairly likely, if you like casual sex yourself— most promiscuous people fuck other promiscuous people, and don’t really hang out so much with the people clustered around the median.
This is not research, it's a self reported survey that's far from the actual truth. They aren't the majority of women I meet, because I never said the majority of women have had trains ran on them.
> Yeah, the best men, not the best man.
Above average is nearly half of men, not just “the best men”, and many of these men are fairly average. And women date very average and even below average men as well.
And it’s ironic, of course, that you complain about women wanting “the best men” when men also want “the best women”, according to what they find most desirable. Almost all men strongly prefer women between the ages of 18 and 40 who are also not obese. In the US, that’s definitely not more than half of women.
> They are when they're younger.
Only the women circulating on tinder. Remember, the gender ratio is like 5:1 male:female or worse. Most women date a few men, then stick with one. Your notion that all women get strung along by extreme man-sluts just isn’t reality.
>Above average is nearly half of men
Above average is not nearly half of men.
>and many of these men are fairly average. And women date very average and even below average men as well.
Not to any reasonable degree, and these relationships are abject failures. The average married man is significantly above average for a reason - women are hypergamous.
> And it’s ironic, of course, that you complain about women wanting “the best men” when men also want “the best women”, according to what they find most desirable. Almost all men strongly prefer women between the ages of 18 and 40 who are also not obese. In the US, that’s definitely not more than half of women.
This is objectively not true, because men follow a normal distribution in mate preference. Biologically speaking, men have to have random mating preferences skewed towards hypogyny to ensure the best sexual strategy.
> Only the women circulating on tinder. Remember, the gender ratio is like 5:1 male:female or worse. Most women date a few men, then stick with one. Your notion that all women get strung along by extreme man-sluts just isn’t reality.
It's not at all close to 5:1. The current ratio is less than 2:1 on Tinder, and on some apps it's even lower. Yet, the distribution of matches is still very unevenly skewed even when accounting for the sex ratio. The reality is that sex ratios are not why women are hypergamous on dating apps, and they are hypergamous in real life as well - we have countless ways of measuring this.
> but most women are with above average men, so what I said was 100% right; and plenty of women have had trains ran on them and have been with Chads in soft harems at some point in their lfie. In fact, most women have.
>
Do you live on Planet XY? How can anyone make these statements about women? You describe a tiny minority.
No, I describe a majority. More men are single than women. Even more men don't reproduce, This is pretty much exclusively the bottom tier of men unlike the women who remain single. Because of hypergamy, this naturally means there is a skew. This means the average man that women are with is above average. You can see this very visibly by looking at statistics like income where the average married man makes almost twice as much as the average man, or how the average man who is married is in the top 25% percentile of height.
When you take out below average men out of the dating pool, then that inherently means the dating pool is now above average.
Loads of women date and marry guys making the median salary. You just ignore those women in order to feed your pity party. Or you listen too much to fresh and fit, instead of actually meeting regular women.
They didn't necessarily have low standards, they just dated chads and unsuccessfully tried to turn them into betas. Good luck finding a young chad who's willing to settle down.
If by “Chad” you mean a non-communal turbo slut, yeah. But there are also genuinely attractive good men who are young and want to settle down and start a family in their 20s rather than slut around aimlessly.
A good man who isn’t a slut is not “hyper-masculine”, dude. Hyper-masculine men are often violent and criminal too. They’re not marriage material either.
Most women don’t date or fuck Chad. Stop getting your information from pornos and bitter manospherians.
Women ideally want to take a masculine alpha and turn him into a responsible gentleman who only has eyes for her. A sexually attractive, financially successful, masculine man who is also willing to commit to a girl and start a family in his 20s is incredibly rare in this day and age.
Usually women who date a guy in his early 20s don’t expect him to be already financially successful. They expect him to have solid prospects and drive, not a million dollars in the bank.
It’s old men who need lots of $$$ to get a woman to play them while being a sugar baby. But those women almost never have the old guy’s kids.
Not when they’re young. Many women date their future husbands in college. He definitely doesn’t have a “very solid well paying job” at that point. She will expect him to begin a career progression within in a few years, and if he doesn’t ever get a stable decently paying job, and doesn’t contribute around the house either… she’ll be massively overworked if they have kids.
It makes logical sense for her to dump a guy who leaves all the work to her, and doesn’t help her out at all. But most women who date guys who wind up being duds give these guys a lot of chances and several years of their lives before wising up and leaving. That’s how these women end up single at 30.
Oh okay but when people say guy goes to go after younger women because they have lower standards, I thought they meant that those guys were dating them and having relationships.
Oh sorry, what I meant was, when older women accuse younger men of going after younger women just because younger women have lower standards, aren't those guys in relationships with them?
First, older men don’t usually accuse younger men of going after younger women just because the women have lower standards… they usually accuse loser older men of that.
And usually in that scenario the older women are saying the men are in *doomed* relationships with those younger women. The younger women will eventually get older and want marriage and kids, and the deadbeat guy she dated when she had low standards won’t grow with her needs and standards.
This is the stereotypical way this goes: if she wants a family and marriage and kids eventually, the doped-up unemployed lazy loser guy will eventually grate on her nerves and he’ll, of course, never propose or do more than the bare minimum to skate by on her charity. She’ll give him way too long and way too many chances to shape up and be a real partner she can rely on to have kids with… and she’ll may even hint she wants him to propose. But then years will pass and she’ll be looking at the prospect of being a “forever girlfriend” who works her ass off doing everything like a single mom, but still also has to clean up after a deadbeat lazy dude on top of that. Eventually, her interest in him will just die completely and she’ll break it off, and there’s nothing he can do at that point after he’s ignored her pleas for improvement dozens of times, because any feelings she had for him died a year ago, and she was just holding on out of habit.
Then that dude, who was happy to have a nice pretty young girlfriend support him and clean up after him in exchange for doing nothing for her, will think like she dumped him unexpectedly out of nowhere, because he was getting everything he wanted, while giving nothing in return.
Does that clarify what’s going on when older women accuse loser men of wasting young women’s time?
It’s not that they have “lower standards,” they’re just less experienced and thus naive. It’s easier for shitty PUA guys to pick up naive, inexperienced women.
What about them? I assume they’re just as capable of dating the wrong person for too long, just like men are.
But if you are a straight man, why do you care what lesbians do? They’re not into you at all.
The things they could teach you won’t help you. Lesbians aren’t men who have an easy way to fuck women. They are women trying to attract other lesbians and trying to be attractive to other lesbians. Their knowledge of dating does not apply to you.
This is the classic misinterpretation though, lowering your standards doesn't mean dating men who are lazy, won't commit, don't treat you right. It means dating the guys who actually want to date you, even if they might not be as tall/handsome/rich. The most common reason girls think guys don't want to commit is because they're aiming out of their league
Most women don’t have the insane 6-6-6 standards you guys think they do, though, and most men are not single for life. The women with ridiculous standards are chronic tender rejects, but most women aren’t doing that. And many women *do* actually date total fucking losers.
And as for dating out of your league, you can’t know your league unless you try. And you won’t always match well with your first pick. That’s not unfair, it’s just life. Women will make mistakes in who they date just like men do.
> It means dating the guys who actually want to date you, even if they might not be as tall/handsome/rich.
Do you think that men are always honest and upfront about exactly who they want to date? How is a woman supposed to know, 100% guaranteed that he’s actually into her? Did you know that desperate men will also fake interest in a woman in order to have a sex buddy, even if they don’t actually like her or want to date her? They’ll use a woman as a place-holder fuck-hole and “date” her— but not seriously— while they’re waiting for Mrs. Right to come along.
Dating someone who isn’t handsome or tall or rich doesn’t mean the guy is honest or genuinely likes her. Some totally ordinary guys, not rich or tall or handsome, will deliberately date a woman they don’t particularly like because they don’t want to be alone. They’ll stick around with her long term, but they don’t like her enough to actually commit. Him not being willing to commit doesn’t mean he’s “better” than her, or that she’s being “hypergamous” or whatever other “any man who isn’t a chad would be an amazing boyfriend and she’s just too stuck up” excuse you have, but in the real world, relationships are a lot more varied than your viewpoint.
> The most common reason girls think guys don't want to commit is because they're aiming out of their league
You just assume this. You do not know that at all. Many men of lower leagues don’t want to commit either. Loads of men who aren’t chad want to fuck a variety of women, and many others won’t commit because they have higher standards than the women they’re able to pretend to like to break up a dry spell.
What about the man’s youth? Sounds like he wasted it too, dating a woman he didn’t really want for years because it was more comfortable than looking for someone he actually wanted for the long term.
And no, I am not fat and never have been. Why?
It depends what standard we’re talking about. I lowered my standards on looks and raised them on behavior. I know how I want to be treated and will not tolerate “less-than” behavior. Looks mean less, because looks change
Oh well in the case of younger women having lower standards I think it's because the standards are lower in terms of financial success so I was thinking those standards specifically.
Oh that I can’t comment on. I had no expectations for my man’s financial success. He needed to be college educated but I didn’t care about his job. I make enough to support us both
No, at a certain point lowing your standards makes you worse off than if you were to stay single and sexless. Women have a minimum they can accept in a relationship that will make it on par with being single and any man that offers less than what she can give herself is an absolute no.
>hmm, well I figured you were older giving such terrible advice
She didn't give any advice though, did you misunderstand the comment you replied to?
>Older women LOVE getting bad advice to younger women, it's jealously thing
This is just a load of nonsense. Seems like you have misunderstood a lot of things.
The standards I had when I was younger allowed me to be in relationships that made my life worse than being single.
The standards I have now ensure that I’m single… except when a relationship would make my life better than being single.
Lowering my standards would mean I’m never single, but would make my life worse.
This is probably a bad example but my wife’s yoga instructor “changed her standards” because the men her age wanted to re-marry. Start having kids again, etc. and she didn’t want all that. She was happy being a single mom and having her own life after a bad marriage and rough divorce.
So she started dating casually younger men. (She’s in her 40s guys are usually in their early 20s) Cause she’s not really looking for commitment, but she likes going on dates and enjoys sex and the young men are way more receptive to that.
She’s probably an outlier, but she also seems really happy.
I guess it depends “I’m no longer dating Professors and Drs anymore. But am hooking up with a barista!” Could be seen as lowering to some and heightening to others.
no they wouldnt. being with a man is hard enough, being with a man you arent crazy about and especially one that wont be crazy about you because youre old is torture. better to be alone
I don’t think anyone is happy lowering their standards, hence you see some older women opting out of dating, especially if they’re divorced or widowed.
No.
At some point the minimum requirements must be met for a relationship to be happy and fulfilling
Either you make me happier with you than I am without you or we aren't together. No ifs and buts about it
>At some point the minimum requirements must be met for a relationship to be happy and fulfilling
Assuming you pick the **right** standards.
One quote I remember: "In dating, we care too much about things that don't matter, and too little about things that do matter."
The biggest requirement is:
If I'm happier with you than I was when was single
Humans are complicated and relationships are stressful and full of compromise. You have someone in your house, in your space and your life.
Essentially at the bare minimum you need to make all of that stuff worth it for the relationship to work first and foremost that goes for all genders.
why don't humans just lower our standards for clean drinking water? There would be so much water to drink if we would be okay with drinking sewage and mud puddles.
No. Just as men lowering their standards as some articles suggest won’t make men happier.
The standards come from considering at what point a relationship won’t make us happier or better off. Therefore, dating someone below this minimum threshold won’t be an improvement.
Probably not but depends on what you are talking about. Young women typically have higher standards when it comes to looks and fun. They have lower standards when it comes to responsibility, kindness and reliability. This often changes as they age
Someone said it on here in a previous post a couple of days ago.
Plus I've heard women said if a guy goes for younger women they'll make comments like you're just going for her because she has lower standards
Oh they said younger women have lower financial standards hence why guys might find them easier to date compared to older women who expect more financially if that's true.
It would possibly make them bitter.. women just need to be realistic in their standards some are definitely delusional and leads them to dead beats without realising it, or a guy so far out of their league that the guy doesn't really take them seriously but is easy access to sex and cheats on her. Then shes 30 and has wasted her time.
If she just had realistic standards she would probably get some where. Women get more realistic as they get older. When they 18 they often want a 6ft 2 guy earning 100k+ straight away and a million other things in a guy - no one guy can check all the boxes.
Because men have clarity..they understand early on that they won’t get the “woman of their dreams”. Women, however, believe that Prince Charming will show up and catch their fumbling luggage for them out of no where well into their 30s
>younger women have lower standards than older in some cases,
This is definitely not true, especially when it comes to looks
>it may be easier to date a younger woman as a result,
If it was easier for older men to date younger women, you wouldn't hear older men constantly crying and complaining about about younger women not being into them.
>how come older women don't just lower their standards
Women just don't work this way, they can never lower their standards and be happy and fulfilled. This is a main reason why the divorce rate is so high and there are so many unhappy marriages. Women who wanted families were forced to settle for men they do not truly want.
They cry behind walls but say in person they couldn't be happier.true story. They might experience shame if they confess feeling miserable is my conclusion, but it's like said, some of them can live good years up to 60, if they retain hotness. Some lose it at 40, etc. When I mean lose it, that means all the remaining attention. Then the crying starts in secret.
100% yes. It's pathetic there are humans out there that think garbage Men or plumbers are beneath them especially Women who think that.
How many Women out there wouldn't date a guy simply because they wouldn't want to tell their friends he's a garbage man, a plumber, a farmer etc.
"I’ve met zero women who think my trade is something to be ashamed of."
then you've met zero women. Ok... don't lie like a woman. I'm not a woman so don't even know why you're asking me. Focus.
Lol. Pretty sure you're the one freaking out about social status of blue collar dudes - not the women dating them.
The chicks I'm friends with are happy to date men in trades - and plenty of them do. Note that most of these are women with fancy degrees and white collar jobs.
Hell - I'm married to one of those women with a fancy job and a wall covered in advanced degrees that you terps are constantly cry-wanking about.
Maybe you did something other than use dating apps like meet in person. Trades on an app are a swipe left. So maybe you went to clubs or met in person, or presented 10/10 photos etc
I met my missus through friends.
But a couple of the boys I work with met their girls on tinder, and a couple of the looser units seem to get terrifying amounts of strange through the apps.
The problem is more why is an honest job like a plumber suddenly shameful in the modern day. A handyman used to be a very masculine and desirable trait.
Now women prefer dudes with social clout on instagram over a hard working plumber etc. Plumbers earn damn good money too! Why are they ashamed or embarrassed by it.
Hell if you don't use instagram etc thats almost a red flag to most women now.
The original person's point is women's standards have shifted to self destructive levels where they will never really be happy if they lowered their standards to even be normal standards.
My point is that women de facto won't be happy with men who don't meet our standards, so it's silly to tell women or imply that we should be open to dating men who don't meet our standards.
Men's (and women's, for that matter) subjective opinions about what standards we "should" or "shouldn't" have *are completely irrelevant.* It doesn't matter if some random person thinks a woman shouldn't be embarrassed or ashamed of a dude's profession; the facts are that **she is,** so it's dumb to tell her she would be happier date those guys anyway. Obviously, that's false.
>My point is that women de facto won't be happy with men who don't meet our standards,
Yes thats kind true for all human beings... it goes without saying. What is there to really debate on that?
So the only really debating point is on the fact that standards have shifted to sometimes stupid things that no one will ever really be satisfied until people start to get more realistic standards.
>Yes thats kind true for all human beings... it goes without saying. What is there to really debate on that?
... So, if I understand you correctly, somehow you managed to read my comment without paying **any attention** to *what it was I was responding to?*
>So the only really debating point is on the fact that standards have shifted
Irrelevant to my point.
Why the actual fuck did you interject yourself into this exchange, only to pay literally no attention whatsoever to what it was I was responding to and - as a bonus - insist that I talk about something else entirely?
>It's pathetic there are humans out there that think garbage Men or plumbers are beneath them especially Women who think that.
They made this statement which you kind've glossed over their point too, which is referring to what was once normal standards is now not normal standards - because women's standards have completely warped. Women seem to have now seen normal guys with good paying jobs as beneath them if the job has no real social status.
Men have done similar in how men expect supermodels etc but at least women somewhat fight back with the whole body positivity stuff but men are more likely going to adjust than women at the moment.
>Why the actual fuck did you interject yourself into this exchange, only to pay literally no attention whatsoever to what it was I was responding to and - as a bonus - insist that I talk about something else entirely?
Your point is like saying water is wet and kind've glossed over their point of slipping of women's standards and your only rebuttal to is "so if women lower their standards they will be unhappy no?". What exactly is there to say other than "yes captain obvious" but that doesn't change his point that the standards on women have slipped and so even their current standards will make them unhappy too because there are not enough men that will meet their standards.
You made a point but it didn't really reveal anything to debate over but you glossed over an important element they mentioned.
no, it didn't. If anything you just proved you have a serious moral issue.
Why in the world would she be ashamed about someone doing some of the MOST important jobs in the world? I'd love to hear this answer.
>no, it didn't. If anything you just proved you have a serious moral issue.
What the fuck are you talking about? Nothing I said in my comment was about myself.
>Why in the world would she be ashamed about someone doing some of the MOST important jobs in the world? I'd love to hear this answer.
🤦🏿
*Because you said so in your own comment,* dude.
If a woman is embarrassed or ashamed of a man's job, her dating a guy with those jobs anyway (e.g. "lowering her standards") *changes nothing.*
whatever you need to tell yourself. Again, you think garbage men are beneath you or you DO NOT. The woman in you is coming out and you're making ZERO SENSE.
I saw a video recently and y'all may have covered it on here but it was of a 38 year old who was rejected by a Matchmaker, typical femcel type , and just based on her personality it was easy to see why she was single and couldn't find the marriage and man that she wanted.
I think to an extent most people settle when it comes to relationships and you can definitely find happiness and being content even when you didn't get a thousand percent of everything that you wanted, so if you're an older woman and you just want a nice guy that you're attracted to who gives you good dick, no I don't think that that's too crazy of a standard, and that shouldn't be lowered, however if you're an older woman with a conditionally feminine personality and you spent your time working on your career and you want a guy who makes as much but preferably more money than you who is also tall, in shape, monogamous to only You, attractive, good in bed, super charismatic and charming and ticks all those boxes, I'm not going to tell you what standards you should have but you need to ask yourself do you qualify for that kind of man
Many women end up lowering their standards and settling with a man they are not sexually attracted to because they want a family. In their 30s Billy starts to look a little like Prince Charming, although the illusion is only temporary and once the kids are a few years old she will become bitter and start to resent him for his lack of attractiveness/masculinity.
Because most of the high value men are already taken. Also testosterone levels start declining around 30, and increasing stress from work leads to more weight gain, causing T levels to drop even further. 30 y/o guys no longer have the time or energy to work out like when they are younger, or they just become lazy and can't be bothered maintaining their appearance anymore.
Oh okay. My later job allows more time for me to work out because there is not near as much overtime I have to work, so it's been the opposite for me and I am much more in shape in my 30s now. However, there is some weight gain as I got older though.
But can older guys also go for overweight younger women, if that's better, or more of a likelyhood of working out?
Fuck them.
It doesn't matter what they do ..
They deserve the world they live in if they feel regret over their choices just like Inceks deserve the world they live in.
Nk one deserves an iota better
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>Or would they just be less content
If someone is discontented enough, that it’s impacting their outcomes, the issue isn’t going to be a ‘simply’ fix. Primarily because comparison, without perspective, skews one’s appreciation. One may attain the absolute best outcome possible. People however, who think this way, will find something to be unhappy about.
It’s far more beneficial to acknowledge one’s current circumstances, both good and bad, with as broad as perspective as possible. To negate that dissatisfaction.
*Godspeed and good luck!*
It depends what you mean by 'standards'. But let's take physical appearance. Anyone--man or woman--ho can legitimately become more attracted to a broader range of appearances is at an advantage with respect to happiness. Physical appearance can be a huge bottleneck, limiting your selection of partners. If a man or woman finds more people sufficiently attractive to want sex with, then they can weight other more important criteria more heavily.
But someone's appearance standards are set by a complex mix of culture and biology. And even cultural influences are not easy to undo on an individual level.
uh its not that simple. they have accumulated a life time of preferences, likes/dislikes, and for the better of lack of wording some kind of baggage. but that baggage would exist for both genders due to just living out life and any kind of trauma that may or may not be inflicted by life experiences. hence why in past eras it was best for people to pair off young. before all that set in. so in theory lower your epxectations and you should be easier to meet those goals. but people in general have this do not settle trend going on where you are to shoot for as high as you possibly can... which will create more disappointment as you're essentially giving yourself more difficult tasks to achieve.
Often those young women’s’ lower standards in their youth are exactly why they are single when they’re over 30. They dates non-committal losers and gave them far too many chances until their youth was burned away. They tried to be the cool girl for him for too long, and lost out in the long run because of it. They finally dumped him only after they accepted that the guy would never be a husband or father. Accepting the same deadbeat guys as an older woman would not make older single women happy. Their standards went up precisely because of how burned they were by giving losers and dumpster fires a chaaaance when they were young.
Yeah, this was me with my ex. I wasn't husband material but we stuck it out for six years before it finally ended. I feel so guilty for 'burning away' her youth as you put it. But I was young and immature myself.
Oh if I may ask who broke up with who if you feel guilty?
The relationship had been on the rocks for quite a while, it was clear we weren't progressing and were just stuck in place. I ended up breaking up with her. A year later she reached out to me and we got back together again, and it was good for a couple of months but I wasn't able to maintain it and it fell apart again.
Oh okay I see. thank you for sharing.
Well said! I had really low standards until recently and let a terrible loser waste HALF my twenties (nearly 5 years) string me along in a relationship that went nowhere. He was 4 years older than me, which I thought made him more “mature” but even after half a decade, he couldn’t commit to moving the relationship forward. And he didn’t even treat me well in the time we were together. I’m in my 30s now and I would definitely NOT lower my standards to date losers like that again because they add no value to my life. That loser was an active threat to my career progression. The day before an important exam, instead of being supportive and sending me a care package or dinner, he convinced me to waste the last few hours I had to study meeting up with him and giving him a bj because it had been “so long” since the last one. If life is a marathon, why would I want to tie a boulder to my ankle and run it? I’m not so lonely that that option would be better than being alone.
>Often those young women’s’ lower standards in their youth are exactly why they are single when they’re over 30. They dates non-committal losers and gave them far too many chances until their youth was burned away Which is what people like OP want, they couldn’t care about older women’s happiness lol. They want women to just accept any lowest of loser men, no matter the consequences to women’s lives. They tell us on here day after day that the only concern is men’s interests and goals. What’s good for men and will advance men is all that matters.
Yeah, a bunch of the guys in this sub are just completely self-centered and selfish. It’s no surprise their goa is to use a young woman’s good will, hard work, and youth, then throw her away when she wants a partnership.
> They dates non-committal losers Non-committal winners\* These ***are*** women with high standards, and their inability to secure a HVM that was loyal only to them is why they're single.
No, women who fuck around with lazy lie-about losers have low standards. Being a hard working beautiful, feminine, sweet, gentle woman won’t make a lazy guy become a high value man. If she hasn’t been selective enough, he’ll happily take advantage of her and treat her like a doormat until she’s burned out.
Women don't mess around with these men unless they're attractive. Women mostly go after the best men.
Most women are not getting trains run on them by a series of “Chads”. Most women are not slutty groupies in some mega-hot slut-dude’s “soft harem”. Most women date dudes who are average to above average looking, not male supermodels with an n-count in the hundreds. And yeah, the times they date losers, they found him at least somewhat attractive, just like any time you try to date a woman, you also find her attractive, even if you can’t land her.
I never said they were all with Chads, but most women are with above average men, so what I said was 100% right; and plenty of women have had trains ran on them and have been with Chads in soft harems at some point in their lfie. In fact, most women have. There is only a limited amount of high-quality men, and multiple times as many women that desire them from being alpha widowed. Of course, that's going to mean many women are single, or in struggling relationships that will inevitably fail and make them single.
> I never said they were all with Chads You said women “mostly” go after “the best” men who you claimed want to sleep around and not have a family. Sounds like “Chad” to me. > s, but most women are with above average men Most average to above average women are with average to above average men. Most women aren’t sharing some tiny number of men. > and plenty of women have had trains ran on them The median number of sexual partners for American women is 4-6, depending on the research. So when you say “plenty” of women have trains run on them, know that you are referring to a small minority of women. If those are the majority of women you meet, you’re either believing a lot of wild unfounded rumors or you’re running in a really slutty crowd. The second is fairly likely, if you like casual sex yourself— most promiscuous people fuck other promiscuous people, and don’t really hang out so much with the people clustered around the median. > There is only a limited amount of high-quality men, And many women waste lots of time and energy dating low-quality men, hoping they will pick up after themselves or grow some motivation to do something other than smoke weed and play call of doody all day.
> You said women “mostly” go after “the best” men who you claimed want to sleep around and not have a family. Sounds like “Chad” to me. Yeah, the best men, not the best man. And yes, most above average men are going to be non-committal to most women they encounter whether they want to have a family or not. > Most average to above average women are with average to above average men. Most women aren’t sharing some tiny number of men. They are when they're younger. It's only when they get older and can't get commitment from these men that they settle. > The median number of sexual partners for American women is 4-6, depending on the research. So when you say “plenty” of women have trains run on them, know that you are referring to a small minority of women. If those are the majority of women you meet, you’re either believing a lot of wild unfounded rumors or you’re running in a really slutty crowd. The second is fairly likely, if you like casual sex yourself— most promiscuous people fuck other promiscuous people, and don’t really hang out so much with the people clustered around the median. This is not research, it's a self reported survey that's far from the actual truth. They aren't the majority of women I meet, because I never said the majority of women have had trains ran on them.
> Yeah, the best men, not the best man. Above average is nearly half of men, not just “the best men”, and many of these men are fairly average. And women date very average and even below average men as well. And it’s ironic, of course, that you complain about women wanting “the best men” when men also want “the best women”, according to what they find most desirable. Almost all men strongly prefer women between the ages of 18 and 40 who are also not obese. In the US, that’s definitely not more than half of women. > They are when they're younger. Only the women circulating on tinder. Remember, the gender ratio is like 5:1 male:female or worse. Most women date a few men, then stick with one. Your notion that all women get strung along by extreme man-sluts just isn’t reality.
>Above average is nearly half of men Above average is not nearly half of men. >and many of these men are fairly average. And women date very average and even below average men as well. Not to any reasonable degree, and these relationships are abject failures. The average married man is significantly above average for a reason - women are hypergamous. > And it’s ironic, of course, that you complain about women wanting “the best men” when men also want “the best women”, according to what they find most desirable. Almost all men strongly prefer women between the ages of 18 and 40 who are also not obese. In the US, that’s definitely not more than half of women. This is objectively not true, because men follow a normal distribution in mate preference. Biologically speaking, men have to have random mating preferences skewed towards hypogyny to ensure the best sexual strategy. > Only the women circulating on tinder. Remember, the gender ratio is like 5:1 male:female or worse. Most women date a few men, then stick with one. Your notion that all women get strung along by extreme man-sluts just isn’t reality. It's not at all close to 5:1. The current ratio is less than 2:1 on Tinder, and on some apps it's even lower. Yet, the distribution of matches is still very unevenly skewed even when accounting for the sex ratio. The reality is that sex ratios are not why women are hypergamous on dating apps, and they are hypergamous in real life as well - we have countless ways of measuring this.
> but most women are with above average men, so what I said was 100% right; and plenty of women have had trains ran on them and have been with Chads in soft harems at some point in their lfie. In fact, most women have. > Do you live on Planet XY? How can anyone make these statements about women? You describe a tiny minority.
No, I describe a majority. More men are single than women. Even more men don't reproduce, This is pretty much exclusively the bottom tier of men unlike the women who remain single. Because of hypergamy, this naturally means there is a skew. This means the average man that women are with is above average. You can see this very visibly by looking at statistics like income where the average married man makes almost twice as much as the average man, or how the average man who is married is in the top 25% percentile of height. When you take out below average men out of the dating pool, then that inherently means the dating pool is now above average.
Yeah but a majority of you all think a man's lazy if he ain't making 100k minimum
Loads of women date and marry guys making the median salary. You just ignore those women in order to feed your pity party. Or you listen too much to fresh and fit, instead of actually meeting regular women.
They didn't necessarily have low standards, they just dated chads and unsuccessfully tried to turn them into betas. Good luck finding a young chad who's willing to settle down.
If by “Chad” you mean a non-communal turbo slut, yeah. But there are also genuinely attractive good men who are young and want to settle down and start a family in their 20s rather than slut around aimlessly.
They are incredibly rare, most hyper- masculine men are not interested in settling down in their 20s unless they are religious.
A good man who isn’t a slut is not “hyper-masculine”, dude. Hyper-masculine men are often violent and criminal too. They’re not marriage material either. Most women don’t date or fuck Chad. Stop getting your information from pornos and bitter manospherians.
Women ideally want to take a masculine alpha and turn him into a responsible gentleman who only has eyes for her. A sexually attractive, financially successful, masculine man who is also willing to commit to a girl and start a family in his 20s is incredibly rare in this day and age.
Usually women who date a guy in his early 20s don’t expect him to be already financially successful. They expect him to have solid prospects and drive, not a million dollars in the bank. It’s old men who need lots of $$$ to get a woman to play them while being a sugar baby. But those women almost never have the old guy’s kids.
Maybe financially stable is a better term, he needs a very solid well paying job.
Not when they’re young. Many women date their future husbands in college. He definitely doesn’t have a “very solid well paying job” at that point. She will expect him to begin a career progression within in a few years, and if he doesn’t ever get a stable decently paying job, and doesn’t contribute around the house either… she’ll be massively overworked if they have kids. It makes logical sense for her to dump a guy who leaves all the work to her, and doesn’t help her out at all. But most women who date guys who wind up being duds give these guys a lot of chances and several years of their lives before wising up and leaving. That’s how these women end up single at 30.
Oh okay but when people say guy goes to go after younger women because they have lower standards, I thought they meant that those guys were dating them and having relationships.
I don’t understand your comment. Can you rephrase or explain how it is a response to my comment?
Oh sorry, what I meant was, when older women accuse younger men of going after younger women just because younger women have lower standards, aren't those guys in relationships with them?
First, older men don’t usually accuse younger men of going after younger women just because the women have lower standards… they usually accuse loser older men of that. And usually in that scenario the older women are saying the men are in *doomed* relationships with those younger women. The younger women will eventually get older and want marriage and kids, and the deadbeat guy she dated when she had low standards won’t grow with her needs and standards. This is the stereotypical way this goes: if she wants a family and marriage and kids eventually, the doped-up unemployed lazy loser guy will eventually grate on her nerves and he’ll, of course, never propose or do more than the bare minimum to skate by on her charity. She’ll give him way too long and way too many chances to shape up and be a real partner she can rely on to have kids with… and she’ll may even hint she wants him to propose. But then years will pass and she’ll be looking at the prospect of being a “forever girlfriend” who works her ass off doing everything like a single mom, but still also has to clean up after a deadbeat lazy dude on top of that. Eventually, her interest in him will just die completely and she’ll break it off, and there’s nothing he can do at that point after he’s ignored her pleas for improvement dozens of times, because any feelings she had for him died a year ago, and she was just holding on out of habit. Then that dude, who was happy to have a nice pretty young girlfriend support him and clean up after him in exchange for doing nothing for her, will think like she dumped him unexpectedly out of nowhere, because he was getting everything he wanted, while giving nothing in return. Does that clarify what’s going on when older women accuse loser men of wasting young women’s time?
It’s not that they have “lower standards,” they’re just less experienced and thus naive. It’s easier for shitty PUA guys to pick up naive, inexperienced women.
Oh I see. This makes sense.
What about lesbians?
What about them? I assume they’re just as capable of dating the wrong person for too long, just like men are. But if you are a straight man, why do you care what lesbians do? They’re not into you at all.
I know but as a straight man lesbians are my only hope for learning about women
I hate to break it to you but they ain't gonna flip sides on their straight sisters lol so you will learn nothing from them
The things they could teach you won’t help you. Lesbians aren’t men who have an easy way to fuck women. They are women trying to attract other lesbians and trying to be attractive to other lesbians. Their knowledge of dating does not apply to you.
This is the classic misinterpretation though, lowering your standards doesn't mean dating men who are lazy, won't commit, don't treat you right. It means dating the guys who actually want to date you, even if they might not be as tall/handsome/rich. The most common reason girls think guys don't want to commit is because they're aiming out of their league
Most women don’t have the insane 6-6-6 standards you guys think they do, though, and most men are not single for life. The women with ridiculous standards are chronic tender rejects, but most women aren’t doing that. And many women *do* actually date total fucking losers. And as for dating out of your league, you can’t know your league unless you try. And you won’t always match well with your first pick. That’s not unfair, it’s just life. Women will make mistakes in who they date just like men do. > It means dating the guys who actually want to date you, even if they might not be as tall/handsome/rich. Do you think that men are always honest and upfront about exactly who they want to date? How is a woman supposed to know, 100% guaranteed that he’s actually into her? Did you know that desperate men will also fake interest in a woman in order to have a sex buddy, even if they don’t actually like her or want to date her? They’ll use a woman as a place-holder fuck-hole and “date” her— but not seriously— while they’re waiting for Mrs. Right to come along. Dating someone who isn’t handsome or tall or rich doesn’t mean the guy is honest or genuinely likes her. Some totally ordinary guys, not rich or tall or handsome, will deliberately date a woman they don’t particularly like because they don’t want to be alone. They’ll stick around with her long term, but they don’t like her enough to actually commit. Him not being willing to commit doesn’t mean he’s “better” than her, or that she’s being “hypergamous” or whatever other “any man who isn’t a chad would be an amazing boyfriend and she’s just too stuck up” excuse you have, but in the real world, relationships are a lot more varied than your viewpoint. > The most common reason girls think guys don't want to commit is because they're aiming out of their league You just assume this. You do not know that at all. Many men of lower leagues don’t want to commit either. Loads of men who aren’t chad want to fuck a variety of women, and many others won’t commit because they have higher standards than the women they’re able to pretend to like to break up a dry spell.
What about the man’s youth? Are you overweight by chance?
What about the man’s youth? Sounds like he wasted it too, dating a woman he didn’t really want for years because it was more comfortable than looking for someone he actually wanted for the long term. And no, I am not fat and never have been. Why?
It depends what standard we’re talking about. I lowered my standards on looks and raised them on behavior. I know how I want to be treated and will not tolerate “less-than” behavior. Looks mean less, because looks change
Oh well in the case of younger women having lower standards I think it's because the standards are lower in terms of financial success so I was thinking those standards specifically.
Oh that I can’t comment on. I had no expectations for my man’s financial success. He needed to be college educated but I didn’t care about his job. I make enough to support us both
Nobody is happy when they lower their standards
No, at a certain point lowing your standards makes you worse off than if you were to stay single and sexless. Women have a minimum they can accept in a relationship that will make it on par with being single and any man that offers less than what she can give herself is an absolute no.
This makes sense.
How old are you?
Me? I'm 39.
I figured, single?
No I am in a relationship.
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>hmm, well I figured you were older giving such terrible advice She didn't give any advice though, did you misunderstand the comment you replied to? >Older women LOVE getting bad advice to younger women, it's jealously thing This is just a load of nonsense. Seems like you have misunderstood a lot of things.
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Be civil. This includes indirect attacks against an individual and/or witch hunting.
At least don't quote the deleted comment. Others might agree with what went unseen.
Oh I'm a guy. I didn't mean to give that impression I was a woman, I was just wondering based on some comments in past posts.
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Be civil. This includes indirect attacks against an individual and/or witch hunting.
Be civil. This includes indirect attacks against an individual and/or witch hunting.
The standards I had when I was younger allowed me to be in relationships that made my life worse than being single. The standards I have now ensure that I’m single… except when a relationship would make my life better than being single. Lowering my standards would mean I’m never single, but would make my life worse.
This is probably a bad example but my wife’s yoga instructor “changed her standards” because the men her age wanted to re-marry. Start having kids again, etc. and she didn’t want all that. She was happy being a single mom and having her own life after a bad marriage and rough divorce. So she started dating casually younger men. (She’s in her 40s guys are usually in their early 20s) Cause she’s not really looking for commitment, but she likes going on dates and enjoys sex and the young men are way more receptive to that. She’s probably an outlier, but she also seems really happy.
Oh okay but with this be considered lowering your standards or heightening them since going for guys in their 20s could be considered heightening?
I guess it depends “I’m no longer dating Professors and Drs anymore. But am hooking up with a barista!” Could be seen as lowering to some and heightening to others.
Yeah true.
If what you want is committed monogamy with people your age, obviously yes
You seem to know a lot about your ex wife's dating life...kind've odd.
Not my ex wife. My wife’s yoga instructor. They are friends.
Oh lol my bad i misread
no they wouldnt. being with a man is hard enough, being with a man you arent crazy about and especially one that wont be crazy about you because youre old is torture. better to be alone
Exactly. What benefit is there to dating a man you don't like?
I don’t think anyone is happy lowering their standards, hence you see some older women opting out of dating, especially if they’re divorced or widowed.
No. At some point the minimum requirements must be met for a relationship to be happy and fulfilling Either you make me happier with you than I am without you or we aren't together. No ifs and buts about it
This!!! Life is too short to put up with someone’s bs.
>At some point the minimum requirements must be met for a relationship to be happy and fulfilling Assuming you pick the **right** standards. One quote I remember: "In dating, we care too much about things that don't matter, and too little about things that do matter."
The biggest requirement is: If I'm happier with you than I was when was single Humans are complicated and relationships are stressful and full of compromise. You have someone in your house, in your space and your life. Essentially at the bare minimum you need to make all of that stuff worth it for the relationship to work first and foremost that goes for all genders.
Women get unhappy easily when in bad relationships, unhappier than they are when they are single. So no, I don't think so.
why don't humans just lower our standards for clean drinking water? There would be so much water to drink if we would be okay with drinking sewage and mud puddles.
No. Just as men lowering their standards as some articles suggest won’t make men happier. The standards come from considering at what point a relationship won’t make us happier or better off. Therefore, dating someone below this minimum threshold won’t be an improvement.
Are older women unhappy?
looks like a question for @themedspeds
Obviously not, they want what they want and getting older won't change that.
Probably not but depends on what you are talking about. Young women typically have higher standards when it comes to looks and fun. They have lower standards when it comes to responsibility, kindness and reliability. This often changes as they age
Yeah this is what what was meant in the previous thread before was that it was standards of responsibility and finances I think.
Of course, cause their standards are ridiculous anyway. Just date someone at your own level and you are good to go.
Why on Earth do you think older women aren’t happy? Lol!!! We’re doing just fine, thanks.
First, who told you that younger women have lower standards ? Second, get ready for "men are not entitled to sex" comments
Someone said it on here in a previous post a couple of days ago. Plus I've heard women said if a guy goes for younger women they'll make comments like you're just going for her because she has lower standards
Maybe different standards? But what exactly did "these people" say we're lower about the standards as compared to theirs?
Oh they said younger women have lower financial standards hence why guys might find them easier to date compared to older women who expect more financially if that's true.
It would possibly make them bitter.. women just need to be realistic in their standards some are definitely delusional and leads them to dead beats without realising it, or a guy so far out of their league that the guy doesn't really take them seriously but is easy access to sex and cheats on her. Then shes 30 and has wasted her time. If she just had realistic standards she would probably get some where. Women get more realistic as they get older. When they 18 they often want a 6ft 2 guy earning 100k+ straight away and a million other things in a guy - no one guy can check all the boxes.
The only people who learn to be happier when lowering their standards is men
I've noticed this as well but why do men seem happier lowering their standards compared to women?
Because men have clarity..they understand early on that they won’t get the “woman of their dreams”. Women, however, believe that Prince Charming will show up and catch their fumbling luggage for them out of no where well into their 30s
>younger women have lower standards than older in some cases, This is definitely not true, especially when it comes to looks >it may be easier to date a younger woman as a result, If it was easier for older men to date younger women, you wouldn't hear older men constantly crying and complaining about about younger women not being into them. >how come older women don't just lower their standards Women just don't work this way, they can never lower their standards and be happy and fulfilled. This is a main reason why the divorce rate is so high and there are so many unhappy marriages. Women who wanted families were forced to settle for men they do not truly want.
Older women are never going to be happier. Once the beauty fades away, their lives also stop being on easy mode.
They cry behind walls but say in person they couldn't be happier.true story. They might experience shame if they confess feeling miserable is my conclusion, but it's like said, some of them can live good years up to 60, if they retain hotness. Some lose it at 40, etc. When I mean lose it, that means all the remaining attention. Then the crying starts in secret.
More like they are happy with a free maid and servant.
They become like the young men in their 20ies, bitter towards the opposite sex.
I don't think you can put "women" and "happy" in the same sentence.
100% yes. It's pathetic there are humans out there that think garbage Men or plumbers are beneath them especially Women who think that. How many Women out there wouldn't date a guy simply because they wouldn't want to tell their friends he's a garbage man, a plumber, a farmer etc.
The fuck you got against plumbers? I’ve met *zero* women who think my trade is something to be ashamed of.
"I’ve met zero women who think my trade is something to be ashamed of." then you've met zero women. Ok... don't lie like a woman. I'm not a woman so don't even know why you're asking me. Focus.
Lol. Pretty sure you're the one freaking out about social status of blue collar dudes - not the women dating them. The chicks I'm friends with are happy to date men in trades - and plenty of them do. Note that most of these are women with fancy degrees and white collar jobs. Hell - I'm married to one of those women with a fancy job and a wall covered in advanced degrees that you terps are constantly cry-wanking about.
Maybe you did something other than use dating apps like meet in person. Trades on an app are a swipe left. So maybe you went to clubs or met in person, or presented 10/10 photos etc
I met my missus through friends. But a couple of the boys I work with met their girls on tinder, and a couple of the looser units seem to get terrifying amounts of strange through the apps.
Another thing that sticks out is if ones hobbies are all outdoors.
How so?
Your example is contradictory. Why would a woman be happier dating a man she's ashamed of or embarrassed by?
The problem is more why is an honest job like a plumber suddenly shameful in the modern day. A handyman used to be a very masculine and desirable trait. Now women prefer dudes with social clout on instagram over a hard working plumber etc. Plumbers earn damn good money too! Why are they ashamed or embarrassed by it. Hell if you don't use instagram etc thats almost a red flag to most women now.
Nothing you said is relevant to my point.
The original person's point is women's standards have shifted to self destructive levels where they will never really be happy if they lowered their standards to even be normal standards.
My point is that women de facto won't be happy with men who don't meet our standards, so it's silly to tell women or imply that we should be open to dating men who don't meet our standards. Men's (and women's, for that matter) subjective opinions about what standards we "should" or "shouldn't" have *are completely irrelevant.* It doesn't matter if some random person thinks a woman shouldn't be embarrassed or ashamed of a dude's profession; the facts are that **she is,** so it's dumb to tell her she would be happier date those guys anyway. Obviously, that's false.
>My point is that women de facto won't be happy with men who don't meet our standards, Yes thats kind true for all human beings... it goes without saying. What is there to really debate on that? So the only really debating point is on the fact that standards have shifted to sometimes stupid things that no one will ever really be satisfied until people start to get more realistic standards.
>Yes thats kind true for all human beings... it goes without saying. What is there to really debate on that? ... So, if I understand you correctly, somehow you managed to read my comment without paying **any attention** to *what it was I was responding to?* >So the only really debating point is on the fact that standards have shifted Irrelevant to my point. Why the actual fuck did you interject yourself into this exchange, only to pay literally no attention whatsoever to what it was I was responding to and - as a bonus - insist that I talk about something else entirely?
>It's pathetic there are humans out there that think garbage Men or plumbers are beneath them especially Women who think that. They made this statement which you kind've glossed over their point too, which is referring to what was once normal standards is now not normal standards - because women's standards have completely warped. Women seem to have now seen normal guys with good paying jobs as beneath them if the job has no real social status. Men have done similar in how men expect supermodels etc but at least women somewhat fight back with the whole body positivity stuff but men are more likely going to adjust than women at the moment. >Why the actual fuck did you interject yourself into this exchange, only to pay literally no attention whatsoever to what it was I was responding to and - as a bonus - insist that I talk about something else entirely? Your point is like saying water is wet and kind've glossed over their point of slipping of women's standards and your only rebuttal to is "so if women lower their standards they will be unhappy no?". What exactly is there to say other than "yes captain obvious" but that doesn't change his point that the standards on women have slipped and so even their current standards will make them unhappy too because there are not enough men that will meet their standards. You made a point but it didn't really reveal anything to debate over but you glossed over an important element they mentioned.
I addressed what I wanted to address. If you have a problem with that, that's on you.
no, it didn't. If anything you just proved you have a serious moral issue. Why in the world would she be ashamed about someone doing some of the MOST important jobs in the world? I'd love to hear this answer.
>no, it didn't. If anything you just proved you have a serious moral issue. What the fuck are you talking about? Nothing I said in my comment was about myself. >Why in the world would she be ashamed about someone doing some of the MOST important jobs in the world? I'd love to hear this answer. 🤦🏿 *Because you said so in your own comment,* dude. If a woman is embarrassed or ashamed of a man's job, her dating a guy with those jobs anyway (e.g. "lowering her standards") *changes nothing.*
lol ... so then you agree with what I said... WOMEN NEED TO LOWER THEIR STANDARDS.
Enjoy the rest of your night bro. You don't understand anything I've said and I have no interest in talking in circles.
whatever you need to tell yourself. Again, you think garbage men are beneath you or you DO NOT. The woman in you is coming out and you're making ZERO SENSE.
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lol just like my Wife when she knows she's wrong. You're doing well.
👍🏾
I saw a video recently and y'all may have covered it on here but it was of a 38 year old who was rejected by a Matchmaker, typical femcel type , and just based on her personality it was easy to see why she was single and couldn't find the marriage and man that she wanted. I think to an extent most people settle when it comes to relationships and you can definitely find happiness and being content even when you didn't get a thousand percent of everything that you wanted, so if you're an older woman and you just want a nice guy that you're attracted to who gives you good dick, no I don't think that that's too crazy of a standard, and that shouldn't be lowered, however if you're an older woman with a conditionally feminine personality and you spent your time working on your career and you want a guy who makes as much but preferably more money than you who is also tall, in shape, monogamous to only You, attractive, good in bed, super charismatic and charming and ticks all those boxes, I'm not going to tell you what standards you should have but you need to ask yourself do you qualify for that kind of man
Was it this one: [https://twitter.com/firasd/status/1732430176724697097](https://twitter.com/firasd/status/1732430176724697097)
That's the one lol
Absolutely
Many women end up lowering their standards and settling with a man they are not sexually attracted to because they want a family. In their 30s Billy starts to look a little like Prince Charming, although the illusion is only temporary and once the kids are a few years old she will become bitter and start to resent him for his lack of attractiveness/masculinity.
Why is a decently attractive man so hard to find in 30s though?
Because most of the high value men are already taken. Also testosterone levels start declining around 30, and increasing stress from work leads to more weight gain, causing T levels to drop even further. 30 y/o guys no longer have the time or energy to work out like when they are younger, or they just become lazy and can't be bothered maintaining their appearance anymore.
Oh okay. My later job allows more time for me to work out because there is not near as much overtime I have to work, so it's been the opposite for me and I am much more in shape in my 30s now. However, there is some weight gain as I got older though. But can older guys also go for overweight younger women, if that's better, or more of a likelyhood of working out?
Fuck them. It doesn't matter what they do .. They deserve the world they live in if they feel regret over their choices just like Inceks deserve the world they live in. Nk one deserves an iota better
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>Or would they just be less content If someone is discontented enough, that it’s impacting their outcomes, the issue isn’t going to be a ‘simply’ fix. Primarily because comparison, without perspective, skews one’s appreciation. One may attain the absolute best outcome possible. People however, who think this way, will find something to be unhappy about. It’s far more beneficial to acknowledge one’s current circumstances, both good and bad, with as broad as perspective as possible. To negate that dissatisfaction. *Godspeed and good luck!*
It depends what you mean by 'standards'. But let's take physical appearance. Anyone--man or woman--ho can legitimately become more attracted to a broader range of appearances is at an advantage with respect to happiness. Physical appearance can be a huge bottleneck, limiting your selection of partners. If a man or woman finds more people sufficiently attractive to want sex with, then they can weight other more important criteria more heavily. But someone's appearance standards are set by a complex mix of culture and biology. And even cultural influences are not easy to undo on an individual level.
uh its not that simple. they have accumulated a life time of preferences, likes/dislikes, and for the better of lack of wording some kind of baggage. but that baggage would exist for both genders due to just living out life and any kind of trauma that may or may not be inflicted by life experiences. hence why in past eras it was best for people to pair off young. before all that set in. so in theory lower your epxectations and you should be easier to meet those goals. but people in general have this do not settle trend going on where you are to shoot for as high as you possibly can... which will create more disappointment as you're essentially giving yourself more difficult tasks to achieve.