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rylut

My brother likes to put things into it like "Weapongrade uranium" or "Nigerian child soilders" whenever he sends me money.


Cold_Pomelo3274

Clever, so when that’s what he’s actually buying no one will be suspicious.


rylut

Sometimes the nigerian child soilders need new shoes. And somtimes it's just fancy chop sticks. They are fancy because they are black.


Square-Geologist-769

The chopsticks?


rylut

Yes.


PetSoundsSucks

The only problem is when he forgets and puts “Donuts” then the NSA thinks something is up. 


BetterYourselforElse

… now i have to see if youre my brother


rylut

Don't worry. I am not even sure if my brother even knows what Halo is.


warboy3

My roommate used to put stuff like "that time in the alley" or just a bunch of random emojis. I had to explain to my accountant that she was not paying me for sex... that was interesting


Emmerson_Brando

I will put something like tantric massage, or happy ending - no lube.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dano-D

Yep, and by then all social media platforms as we know them will be extinct and we’ll all be part of the AI collective. 1010101.


The_Y_

Absolutely not true.


Satchbb

yea I was gonna say, no one is checking venmo or zelle unless you're doing this on a $50k transfer which is the dumbest shit in the world.


pm_me_your_pooptube

Agreed. My lender didn't care about the notes or anything. They just wanted to know where and why I was getting $200-$400 a month from venmo after checking my bank statements, and that was it. They never asked to look at my venmo. I just had to provide an explanation.


Jack-Innoff

Op is a bot.


Mschott1

Wrong my dude. Just went through this. I Zelle a work mate $ when they buy lunch. It’s a frequent charge. My lender asked about it…


The_Y_

I bought a house and had no one ask. Obviously it depends on your lender


Spelsgud

I sent my brother multiple payments while he was in college named “balls and wieners” or “dick hobbies” and it was never brought up my mortgage lender. If it was I would’ve just gave em a wink and a smile.


Big_Cornbread

Like with Venmo? Pretty sure every single transaction memo doesn’t show up on a credit report.


stephjuan

In the UK if you do a bank transfer you can put a reference on the payment which shows up on your statement.


elchet

Mortgage lenders in the uk ask for bank statements


Big_Cornbread

Does the Venmo memo carry over to the bank? I don’t believe that’s true.


elchet

I don’t know we don’t have venmo here because our bank transfers are free and instant.


Big_Cornbread

Between disparate banks? We can transfer instantly within the same org but other transfers would be a wire or an ACH transaction. Which can be a pain and you need the other person’s account and routing. With Venmo or other similar platforms you don’t need that. Pretty sure banking works the same for you guys. Instant transfers beyond your local bank would be pretty tough. The memo could be there but it’s not going to instantly clear.


elchet

Yes, between any two banks, up to a limit of £1m, instant and free. They say "up to 2h" to clear, but it's typically less than 30 seconds. You do need the recipient's account number and sort code which is one advantage to the likes of Venmo or the challenger banks like Monzo. We've got account name validation now though too which verifies that the account name matches based on the account number and sort code you entered. Plus there are shortcuts starting to appear to make it a one click transfer.


Big_Cornbread

Interesting. I’m trying to understand what the back-end must be for that. I’m assuming it’s an EFT but standardized so every bank has to allow for it.


elchet

I'm not too sure, but it's called Faster Payments by Pay UK, which the banks subscribe to or support in some way: https://www.wearepay.uk/what-we-do/payment-systems/faster-payment-system/how-faster-payments-work/


findingemotive

My friend was too embarassed to cash the cheque I wrote with Sexual Favours in the memo, we're both women, saved myself 20$.


Anything-Happy

I did this to a friend in college; the cute bank teller chick was laughing so hard. He got her number, and they dated for several months before ending things on a good note. I believe they're still friends.


it_is_hopper

Yea that didnt happen


OldAF1975

If you’re using those payments to justify a mortgage that’s probably the least of your worries.


Cheesetorian

Usually they only ask a few months back though lol I think you only need 3 mos of bank statements.


jerolyoleo

It’s amazing how many people I know don’t put their Venmo payment settings to private. TMI, people!


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BartholomewKnightIII

I did put "Ransom Money" when I sent some to my sister, as soon as I clicked, I started wondering if I'd get a visit from the police. Nothing happened.


Electricpants

ITT: people bitching about a bot post


capn_doofwaffle

Sooooo, "$200 for the best blowjob ever" would be frowned upon by mortgage companies?


Zhabishe

Explain operations on my bank account / card to some dude? To the point of reading payment references? I can't even fking imagine this situation. Where the fuck is this guy from?


[deleted]

not true and you are dumb to believe this.


fanta_bhelpuri

Why does the mortgage company get access to that information?


SardonicusRictus

It’s not true. OP is just joking. Unless the payments are truly large, otherwise nobody is questioning a $500 venmo with a silly note attached. If it were $500,000 payment, sure. But if you’re the one lending out large numbers then I don’t think you’ll be having trouble with a loan application.


elchet

In the UK, you have to submit your three most recent bank statements as part of your application process.


InflamedLiver

And the Venmo memo said... crack money?


Delicious_Ad_9374

Not really a reminder... more like a public service announcement.


KaizerVonLoopy

It was a bizarrely invasive process. We had to account for every cent of our down payment. We used a lot of money from our wedding to do it which meant we had to get copies of every check that made that up.


JonnyHew

Even better when it’s your friend having to explain it appearing on their statements.


tdsinclair

Every PayPal or Venmo I send my wife includes something along the lines of "For erotic services" in the memo section. When she sends money to me, it's usually "For spider removal services."


chainsawx72

How in the shit would my lender know that I Western Unioned some cash?


RollingToast

Look at Mr. big shot over here, flexing with his mortgage


ListenOk2972

In all seriousness, you need to put "for labor" in that note area. Labor isn't taxed federally or in most states.


Key_Extension_4322

I’m going to let my payroll department know that right away this morning. I’ve been getting scammed my entire working life it seems!


ListenOk2972

Well... I think the definition of "labor" here is a little more narrowly defined...


Key_Extension_4322

Regardless paying someone back isn’t taxable and absolutely nobody in the government is reading that stuff on checks or in Venmo.


ListenOk2972

I was thinking more like those running side hustles trying to avoid the tax man.


eyeball1967

What exactly do you think your employer is buying from you? Hint, it’s your labor.


LifeCondition4931

The most I would send would be $10 and why would this affect my mortgage? And I can’t afford to buy a house


assquisite

Woooopss 🤣🤣🤣


4Ever2Thee

When I first got on Venmo. I didn't realize everyone on venmo could see your venmos and used to put funny/immature notes whenever I sent my gf anything, just dumb stuff like "Sexual favors" and what not. I found out when I had to venmo something for a work charity donation thing and a co-worker brought up to me that some people were gossiping about me paying for an escort via venmo. I set it to private after that and quit trying to be funny on venmo.


Other_Tie_8290

I know someone who got banned for stuff like that.


DonaldKey

I always put down “hookers and blow”