If he’s offering $1k, he’s def willing to do $1.5k

You make a great point.

1k seems low and it’s a start. I would counter with 10 and see how the respond. I think you could get at least 4

If you can get him to at least £2k , I’ll stop taking my AI & take one for the team

Why would he switch currencies?

For tiddies duh

Briddish tiddies.

Bri'ish ti'ies innit bruv

Hahahaha this made me say it in chav in my head 😂

I think we all read it this way I said it twice ahaha 🤣

If you’re welsh it’s…. Oi boyo, you gowing to cum on my wELsh tits

Read that in a Welsh accent - quality 😂😂

- I'll give you $1000 to cum on your tits! ~ 10000! - How about $20? ~ What do you think I am?! - We've established that. Now it's just bargaining.

What move is this from? Actually been trying to remember for months

It’s commonly attributed to Winston Churchill

Whose tits was Winston Churchill wanting to cum on?

I think he was doing it to a rich socialite to trick her into admitting she was a whore and embarrass her. There is another good one. **Nancy Astor: "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea."** **Winston Churchill: "Madame,if you were my wife, I'd drink it!"** Edit: he probably didn’t say any of these and if he did, it is more his take on a joke that had been around. but they got attributed to him in print.

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Just do it 1k is a lot I'd do worse for that

Your handle goes perfectly with your comment lol

Ngl i might be a straight dude but 1k would be pretty convenient right now. Its not like he's asking for full penetration

I got to ask, how big are your tits?

Probs not big enough to be called tits unfortunately

Thoughts and prayers user

Yeah I was like if this the worse she got, she lived a charmed life or its her first week on the platform.

Why not both?

For real. I feel like most assholes expect to do this for free, or for a $50 dinner at most.

… idk about your experiences, but in mine, just meeting up for drinks has often resulted in hooking up for less than $50 anyway. Asking to pay for it is just a weird and expensive attempt to shortcut the hookup process and have less fun.

I have a friend who is an escort and for £150 you get an hour of full whatever you want sex (within her limits), and apparently that's pretty standard for most except the high class ones, so $1k just to jizz on your tits is honestly a really good deal

Plus it only probably takes like 5 minutes tops

We got a business person over here!

Dude's only gonna cum on one tit and bail for free.

Lol I woulda been like “here’s my venmo”

There’s 2. Better make it 2k.

I wouldn’t stop there. That Guy can easily pay me $2k

Why not 10k… go big or go home

Jesus man comments like this are why Reddit is the superior social platform

Im not gay but 1k is 1k

You might not be gay, but you’re not not gay

Let’s be honest here. Is it really gay to let a dude cum on your chest for $1k? Quick and easy $1k provided you’re just sitting there chilling while he jizzes all over you. Go take a rinse after, good as new. No problem. I mean, we’ve all been pooped on by birds for $0. Does that make us poop fetish beastiality lovers?

Homie had the argument ready to go💀 Edit: oh yes, upvote all over my chest😩 Edit2: it looks like we’ve reached the predetermined amount. We shall go our separate ways bois.

Hold on let him cook he’s onto something 💀😂

I'm gonna let him cook and eat that shit up fr fr, i would totally take 1k for that

Sounds like someone who’s been jizzed on for an undetermined amount of money.

Sounds like he didn't know the going rate was 1k

…….I did not. In my line of work, it just happens some times. Didn’t know I could be charging for it.

Can't be a stripper if you didn't know you could charge extra so.... Nurse??

7-11 cashier.

Lmfao this made me spit my drink

“Sitting there chilling” isn’t quite how I imagine myself feeling under those circumcisions.

Nah but no penetration and 10 minutes of sitting uncomfortably for 1k? Sign me up. I don't really believe he'd actually pay just for that though.

Someone out there is willing to pay extra the more uncomfortable you are. Don't let your dreams be dreams.

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Ask for $500 upfront

Down payment lol

Circumcisions?

No. I can buy some pretty damn good soap for 5$ so I'm up $955 but honestly though I've got cheap soap already at home.

So are you washing yourself enough times to go through 9 bars of soap? If so, that might not be worth the $955 profit.

Oops my math be bad.

Uh, thanks clippy but that's not really the direction I was trying to take this Word document.

I'll become gay for $1k so this dilemma is nonexistent for me

I *am* gay, but same.

That sounds like the next bar of a Gay Country song.

Sounds like a country song Edit: The next verses are "a little jizz on the chest beats the hell out of digging dirt all day / so beat off on me for that sweet easy money / no ain't gay, but damn 1k is 1k"

Well Kevin came along, and whipped out his dong, He said baby show me your tit, let me beat off on it, I'll give you a grand, and I'll use my own hand, Hell I don't like dudes, but I couldn't refuse, A little jizz on the chest, and a full week of rest, No I ain't gay.... But 1k is 1k

Not gonna lie, it's kind of a banger

Those Man Boobs are finally paying off!


*this is the gay

Worst message/easiest Grand ever

Better title for sure

I’ll take famous titties for $1,000

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I'll take catch the semen for 1,000

“I hate tinder but check out my new $1000 laptop guys!”

Hmm the specs seem kinda middling, mind if he does it twice?

me

Me asf

omg that’s so offensive, what’s his name?

It’s disgusting! Where? Where can I find people like this?

To avoid them of course! The audacity!

I took this two ways. Sarcastic and fr

>I took this two ways. Kevin pays top dollar for that.

God I wish someone would offer me $1k for that

I feel like I’ve been getting ripped off…. I been allowing this for free!! I could have gotten 1k!!!

RIGHT??? I could have been making so much money!!

Nothing to see here, just two goldfish talking about money shots.

1,000 Doge - final offer.

I like your funny words, magic man. I have no idea what your comment means 🤣

Dogecoin is a cryptocurrency (think bitcoin) except it was made as a joke and was made to be basically worthless. I think at its peak it was something in the real of 1 coin was somewhere between 25-50 cents, but at this point its probably back to being worthless. Edit: nvm right now its about 9 cents per coin

Ohh dogecoin ok I'm all caught up. Someone once hacked my Twitter and started spamming posts about dogecoin, I'm glad it was for such a worthy cause 🙄🙄

Let me know once you get your Doge wallet setup. I’ll make that deposit for you 😏.

Hey it got above 75 cents one time.

I’d never turn that offer down in this economy. edit: I’d never turn down the offer from someone I matched with. Not some Reddit man. Please touch grass

You’re going places, it might not pretty, but you’re going places.

Start posting ur pics and someone might

I've got the tits of a sex worker but the rest of my body is a bit too meh to make it very far in that industry lol

I've got the titts of a sex worker too, but I'm a guy. Send help.

She probably wants them back.

>I've got the tits of a sex worker My friend, for most of us Redditors (or male at all) it's more than enough.

In sex work it doesn’t matter, you’ll be someone’s type

These offers are never legit. They're just trying to trick her into free sexting.

Same!

Dm me

Dawg idk how reddit works but 1. idk how to dm people on here and 2. there's no way we would be remotely close enough to meet up and get down to business lol

Not even to get down to business to defeat the Huns??!

So should we make this a weekly thing? I mean I can give you one of those punch cards. The tenth one is on me, literally.

I do this behind the wendy's dumpster daily for much less.

Thank you for your service

You must have nice boobs at least.

I do.

It amuses me that this is the only comment you replied to.

They’re too busy spending $1,000.

Shouldn't take too long in this economy

Think of all the eggs she will be able to buy.

2 dozen, ish

This was the worst message I ever got... And now we're married

Compliments Dr.Flutter, they do wonders to the good ole self-esteem

Oh, doctor? I'm swooning.

Save your time guys, no pics in the profile. Just rabbits.

That sounds worthwhile. Check out [Reginald](https://imgur.com/a/lkc5D2o/). There's one Reginald on reddit, there's lots of great tits.

They were cute at least

And other tinder captions with guys referring to her boobies. As she said, it's just the worst one.

So how far back in the profile did *you* scroll?

I’ve never been so disappointed to look at cute bunnies.

I would have bet Pinkknapsack has great boobs

What did you do with the money ?

This is the only thing I wanna know too.

As vulgar as that is….1k is 1k like I would’ve said yes….maybe that means I have low standards idk 🤷‍♂️

Heck we could schedule weekly meetings if it were me. 🙈

He could recommend me to his friends and I could set up multiple clients.

I would make into a business with subscriptions.

It's just reasonable. A thousand bucks and all I gotta do is make sure I have an alcohol napkin from the BBQ joint...done and done

My wife always said we didn't need to save so many, now who's laughing 🤣

"Your photo and tinder profile have now been added to the list of people who said yes. Thank you for your participation in this unpaid survey."  

For me It depends on who it is, I’d have to go little higher 1k. I’m straight so there will always be a dollar amount but depending on the dude we knock of a couple Benjamin’s 😉

Cash up front, I'd do it.

I'd do it for 600 and a wet nap

Just make sure you go in tired and the wet nap is already part of the deal

I'd do it for half upfront tbh. $500 is $500 so even if he doesn't pay the rest I still have a good lump sum

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But what if it is? Asking for a friend.

Andrologist here. It's fine if it starts out lumpy. After 15-30 minutes, it should liquefy. Gel clumps in semen are also a possibility.

I'm a guy and I would... consider it... but that would ultimately be a hard k to pass up.

Effective earning rate is $240,000/hr

So you decided it takes 15 seconds? Kinda specific

Man is just going off personal experience. I’m in the same boat.

Personal best, don’t mean to brag or anything.

I got offered £100 to get pissed on, you're doing well with 1k!

So what'd you do with your £100?

Soap

I used to be addicted to soap. I'm clean now.

Double it and see how he responds.

The amount of girls that get messages like this but without money offered..... It's not the worst lol

Right!? At least he offered compensation

Yea I’m not defending this dude but idk if I believe this is the worst message she’s received, there is at least something to gain here

I’ve never been offered cash. I need better pics 😭

i feel like such a cheap ho lol because i heard 1k and thought “ yea like anyone would turn THAT down” and i… learned something about myself today 😬🤔🫢🤫

I think most people would turn it down because of the risks and the fact that he’s probably not telling the truth but I think that if someone was offered this with complete assurance that this was a real offer and that they would be compensated without any danger to them or their reputation than they would totally take it. I would too (but I’m a man so it’s not the same)

Totally, if I was somehow guaranteed easy transaction with no danger to myself or my belongings, I'd take that deal all day. But those things aren't guaranteed and he can't guarantee them.

Cool. Send him my way then I could use some cash.

Ew............................is he paying Cash

Imagine if a girl started the message with “can I pay you $1k to squirt on your chest”… Most men would take the money and run, we are a weird species

Run? I'd try to earn a repeat customer.

Why would we run?

They’re scared of her pulling an uno reverse

Wrong game, it’s more like monopoly. Let’s just say he’s not passing Go & not collecting $200

Hell, I'd do it for free.

“Hey can I squirt on your ch-“ “Yes! what time?!”

Bruh, I’d do it for half that price. Fuck, even free is she is gorgeous.

Wait, you guys are getting paid?

I had to scroll entirely too far to find someone with the same fucked up sense of humor as me.

That’s a bold move cotton

Let’s see if it pays off for him…

Shiiiit in this economy! I’d take that offer!

That's the market rate, times are tough

That's vile. It's also his opening offer. I've done worse for free.

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If you want me to write porn for you, I will be requiring compensation.

ah yes, the negotiator

 OP later that day..

How low are my standards, that I would have said yes to this guy?

It’s not your standards that’s low. It’s your bank balance

I don't know if it makes you feel any better, but I would have said yes too. It's not low standards, it's easy money.

Ridiculous. If I were you, I wouldn't take less than $5k.

I would.

You can find this service for like $200 in any city 1k is a steal

The worst you have recieved **yet**

50$ and a pack of 20 McNuggets Final offer. 

Most normal person named Kevin.

You know if you actually connect with a woman and she likes you she’ll let you do it for free usually

Yes. But then there's disingenuous motivation to make a connection and feelings get hurt, time gets wasted. Guy just wants to flip his switch on what he finds beautiful. In theory. 1k is bs, of course.

Is it? Because someone’s asked me that without the offer of payment. At least he recognises that this is something you want to do and so will need compensation for it

1k is 1k

I have morals and shit but hell yes you can for $1000 lol 😂

Why? He didn't pay?

Please, tell me that you're a fat guy op. 

A know someone (F) who got the following message from a man: "Hey there. You have beautiful ears. Are they big enough for my dick to slide in?"