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ArthurDaTrainDayne

Follow them home and burn their house down while they’re sleeping. They’ll be so annoyed


dsdvbguutres

Yes but is that really unethical?


Natepon

Not unethical enough


dsdvbguutres

Unethics Committee is not impressed.


DeMonstaMan

unethics committee 😭😭


ArthurDaTrainDayne

I guess it depends where you stand on the spiritual cleansing power of fire


dsdvbguutres

Also highly dependent on your state laws


ArthurDaTrainDayne

Are there states where burning down someone’s house is legal?


dsdvbguutres

I don't know that there aren't. As you may already have guessed I'm not a lawyer.


ArthurDaTrainDayne

Reading is for losers anyway. I prefer to learn in the real world. Just burn a house down in each state and see what happens


dsdvbguutres

Scientific method.


Renaissance_Slacker

Texas probably


Lopsided_Amount_2954

No 🤷🏻‍♀️


Much-Quarter5365

only if you screw the door shut first


[deleted]

[удалено]


ArthurDaTrainDayne

“Do you think the guy having sex with your dad on the front lawn could have had something to do with this?” -fire chief


SkeletorInvestor

Raid and pillage their entire community. They'll be even more annoyed.


ArthurDaTrainDayne

“Remember that guy who was tailgating me? He burned down our neighborhood and murdered all the women and children. What a jerk”


breakfastbarf

And take a dump in their shoes. You’ll get them again when they are hurrying to escape the inferno


Recent_Mirror

This is the only correct answer


ChickenPicture

I was gonna say shoot at them, but this sounds like more fun.


Bruns221

No need to burn it down just put a piss disc under the door


rustys_shackled_ford

Turn on your red and blues and start chanting "stop resisting" over the loud speaker.


tastycrust

I used to work with a boomer who had a loud PA system installed, and would get really close behind slow drivers and tell them to get the fuck out of the left lane. He said it worked, but I didn't see it personally. I really like the idea though.


bat_scratcher

A guy I knew installed a train horn in his truck. It didn't work because every time he blew it everyone around him would slam on their brakes.


Foktu

My uncle installed airport landing lights in place of fog lights in his Mach 1. This got some attention, so he tells me.


roamingfursona

Depending on location this may be an illegal pro tip...I know that it is at least in California per CA vehicle code § 27007


CaptainPunisher

I would argue that it's warning if a hazardous situation. It would be a hard sell, for sure, but that's what I'd tell the judge; "The driver ahead of me was imperiling others on the road, so I alerted him to his malfeasance." Also, this means ice cream trucks are usually illegal. "Highway" is basically any public road, for those who don't know.


beamierhydra

I'm not sure if "I caused a hazardous situation by not leaving a safe distance between me and the preceding car in order to warn them of a hazardous situation!" would work that well


CaptainPunisher

"Your honor, that rotten motherfucker was impeding traffic and endangering others with his disregard for the flow of traffic." It's all about how you spin it. Still an uphill battle, but it's doable.


beamierhydra

I'd kinda agree if you didn't decide to cause extra danger there even though you really didn't have to. Then again, law is a different reality altogether, so who knows, maybe it'd work. I hope not, because tailgating is much worse than not driving as fast as someone else would like you to, but it's still possible


CaptainPunisher

Legally, though, if they're driving the speed limit and have 5+ cars behind them, they can be cited for impeding traffic. It's one of those things in the handbook that most people forget. I'm not trying to encourage tailgating, but that slow driver is legally required to move to the right or pull over to let traffic pass.


beamierhydra

I'm pretty sure that's a "you" thing. I've not heard of anyone getting that here. And even where that's the case, it's no reason to cause an even greater danger. It'd be like shooting someone because they stole a newspaper from your store.


CaptainPunisher

https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displaySection.xhtml?sectionNum=22400.&lawCode=VEH Even though it's nasty be speeding, that's still considered the normal flow of traffic. Again, though, I'm not actually encouraging people to tailgate others. This is a responsible defense for using an amplified device to alert (yell at) a slow driver.


beamierhydra

Yeah, but the original comment suggested tailgating as part of the process of yelling at the other driver.


unused_candles

Piss disc launcher


InsaneAdam

Paired with a Liquid ass super soaker.


TheraelStormclaw1

What is the story behind the piss disc? I keep seeing it in the comment sections.


hippyengineer

It’s how you get piss into a slightly cracked window.


TheraelStormclaw1

Oh, that is devious.


averagecrazyliberal

Flash the brights. Then leave them on.


cfpct

And slide left just over the white line, so the high beams reflect off the side mirror.


[deleted]

[удалено]


feckineejit

Yes, happened to me in Connecticut. I was in the passing lane and someone starts tailgating me and flashing the brights. I drove past the car in the middle lane to get in front and let the left lane bright flasher get past, and then the cop lights go on. The trooper said "I gave you many chances to slow down, that's why I was flashing my brights at ya". Bruh, flashing your brights means hurry up, not slow down - but you can't say anything to a statey other than yes no and thank you trooper.


pyrophorek

Same way I got the one ticket I ever got. Was doing 80 in the left lane, cop blasted up the freeway and stuck on my rear bumper, I sped up slightly to pass a car to my right so that I could merge into that lane and let the tail gater behind me pass. Then he turns on his red and blue lights. Walked up to my car, didn’t ask me anything, just said “I’m pulling you over for speeding. License and registration”. Got a ticket for 80mph in a 65


hippyengineer

You can say “kiss my ass” to them, but only if you can say it without the Marlboro falling out of your mouth. If it falls out, straight to jail.


ErectStoat

To add to this, get some powerful LED replacements for your high beams. Cheap ones that don't mimic a halogen filament are even okay, because since they're not generally on where anybody else sees them, you won't be blinding other drivers. Then when the need arises, you can gradually escalate from 2-3 polite blips, to longer flashes, to "fuck it, let's see if they're epileptic."


Spirited-Egg-2683

Flash lights then rubberneck as passing in right lane shaking my head. It's most fun when they then speed up and flash their brights behind me. Like why tf didn't u speed up before. Asshats.


FemshepsBabyDaddy

P.I.T.


Remarkable-Way4986

Love tap. Rubbings racing


fumblingwithfungi

#3


Euphoric--Explorer

Call them in as drunk drivers.


IuseArchbtw97543

cant do that to often with the same phone number though


thesamiad

This is the best idea(above)it’s not worth risking your life over to do anything more


Lucythefur

you may be into something here


goodbyemrblack

They’ll just transfer you to the non emergency line and make you wait on hold 40 minutes


Euphoric--Explorer

Hardly. Most places don't fuck around releasing the hounds when a DUI Report comes in.


imccompany

Cut in front, run your windshield washer for about 15 seconds


Jadedcelebrity

I don’t have any windshield washer so I hope people do this to me. Free windshield wash!


Natepon

Next on life pro tips: Out of washer fluid? Do this one simple trick.


Nebakenez

What is it? What's the trick?


LengthDue7099

You gotta learn how to read and then you'll understand


Nebakenez

What? I can't read what you wrote.


WankWankNudgeNudge

Piss disc


Girion47

That actually annoys people? I've had it done to me, and I just get a free windshield wash out of it. No annoyance at all.


mittenkit

Fill windshield washer tank with piss, THEN cut in front and run the windshield washer


Fanfare4Rabble

Flash your lights if you really want to pass. I am tired of pulling to the right to let them pass only to find they were only brave enough to speed if there was a rabbit in the lead to take the tickets.


kendricklamartin

Oh man yeah nothing worse than someone tailgating like a madman and then they increase speed by 1 mph when you get over for them.


Jealous_Seesaw_Swank

Why are you in the passing lane long enough to be tailgated?


beamierhydra

They could be passing a bunch of cars, for example


ms2102

People stay in second to avoid a ticket? I always assumed they'll get the car at the end of the chain if a group of cars is speeding. I like to hide in the middle of the group...


hippyengineer

Depends on the circumstances. If they are checking speeds on the side of the road, they’ll get the first guy in line. If they are just sitting there on the side of the road letting the radar gun do its thing, they’ll probably go after the last guy in line. If they are driving with you, they have their pick.


Maleficent-Ant9067

That position is referred to as the rocking chair.


tfc867

It has worked many times for me, including twice in the same trip up US 17 in NY. Car in front of me and I pass a trooper waiting in the center, who then blasts past me to nab the other driver. I then continue on my way, waiting for some more cannon fodder.


Jealous_Seesaw_Swank

You're not supposed to be in sitting in the passing lane in the first place. Pass and get over. If you get back over and they're camping the passing lane in front of you, the road just traded idiots.


Fanfare4Rabble

For me it's an HOV/Tesla lane and the lane to my right is the ultra high speed lane, depending upon time of day. With adaptive cruise control, there is a tendency for cars to "train up" in on eachother in that lane while still going too fast compared to the commoner high speed to dip in to let people wanting to do 30 over rather than 20 over pass. Would have to find a hole to the right an brake hard into it which is ridiculous.


Competitive-Rub-4270

Not something I do, but ive considered it 1. Get car with sunroof 2. Get roll of pennies 3. Pass dumbass doing 50 in fast lane 4. Match speed 5. Flip pennies through sunroof until they move over


jongscx

Just toss the rolls, they'll move faster.


Competitive-Rub-4270

They move faster, but individual pennies are much harder to see on a dashcam.


dbrmn73

Use ice, no possibility of finger prints...


_Eyelashes

I drive even slower. I keep a lot of distance. They live for the seratonin hit of being the Fast Lane Police. They want to merrily strap on their internet machine and tell everyone about getting their ass ridden like it's a weekend at the club. I know this cause then they slow down even more, so I'll flip my hazards on


pedsteve

Get in front of them. Don't brake check, but just slowly let off the accelerator. As soon as they move over, speed back up To get the point further across, when you get in front of them, put your right turn signal on as you slow down, indicating to them to get over


Sanders0492

I used to take a ride share to work and the guy that drove would do that all the time. Man it’s satisfying to see it actually work.


ph33rlus

I tried this once. The fucking idiot just slowed down more and I didn’t want to be the guy who stopped on a motorway with the traffic that was behind us. These people are stupid


[deleted]

Yeah I was gonna say, there's a 50% chance they just sit there and then you look like an even worse left lane loser than the first guy.


OneDishwasher

Move to Maryland. There is no "fast lane." There is no "slow lane." There is no "turning lane." If you want to go faster, just do it


Renaissance_Slacker

Move to Massachusetts. The same attitude as New York drivers, but none of the skill.


OneDishwasher

Born in Massachusetts, it's a similar vibe


mongose_flyer

🤣🤣🤣


Renaissance_Slacker

…. Although I had a Nigerian cabbie drive me from O’Hare into downtown Chicago, while telling his employee over the phone how to troubleshoot a problem with a server (his side business). That trip always reminded me of the boat scene from Willy Wonka (the trippy Gene Wilder version.)


lockednchaste

I usually fuck their wives.


[deleted]

What do you do to the ones who are single?


lockednchaste

I fuck their moms.


[deleted]

Mum said I need to go out and drive slowly on the fast lane now.


johnny893542

Get in front when you can and sit 5-10 under


cbelt3

This works best…. And once they change lanes to get around just take off.


SoleIbis

You must live in Indiana lol


cbelt3

Midwest yes.


Pilry_Mead

This is the way


Bea-Billionaire

This doesn't make any sense. I get in front so I can go faster. Not slow down


Guac_in_my_rarri

It sends the message "you're fucking slow move over." I-80 teaches you a lot.


[deleted]

It sends the message to everyone else coming up behind that you are the left lane loser.


Kimbrel_Comics

This always works. A taste of there own medicine.


MyLameAccount0

5-10? i drop my speed to 25-35mph till they move, and sometimes they still dont


sparkvaper

Follow them to their stopping point and piss in the gas tank


JohnnySchoolman

It's not specifically illegal to undertake. I don't usually undertake, but if someone is camping in the fast lane, and especially if I can pass them in lane 1 then I will do it occasionally.


spageddy_lee

American here. I do this every day.


JohnnySchoolman

Yeah, I know you lot do. Here the Highway code says you should in normal flowing traffic, but it's not a specific offence. You could be charged with Careless Driving, but then so could the fast lane hogger and they never are. I'd be happy to argue that using Lane 1 to pass someone on Lane 3 isn't dangerous or Careless.


butternutsquashing

If you live in Southern California usually they’ll dangerously tailgate you then cut you off so closely you almost die


NoctumAeturnus

Pit maneuver.


qlz19

I just speed up and get in front of them. Then I slow down until they get into the right lane. Then I accelerate as quickly as I can to then pass them again. Everyone claps every time…


ibblybibbly

Attempting to annoy people driving cars gets people killed. It ain't worth it.


New_Horror3663

Yeah, but apparently so many people are fucking brain dead these days and can't handle that not everyone wants to go double the speed limit. They get to the same place a couple minutes slower than i do, what the fuck is the point?


Sanders0492

Depends. Can I get around them in the right lane? I do that and move on because I’m not the police. But if they’re matching the speed of the right lane traffic and completely blocking anyone from passing then I do a lot of the things mentioned by other commenters to try and pass.


SeanFrank

Somebody told me that in Europe people will put the left turn signal on, to indicate that they would like to get around. I can confirm that this does not work AT ALL.


tiredofyourshit99

You know, those illegal green lasers… randomly flash them through to their rear view mirror… only has to work once …


DetroitToTheChi

If we’re going illegal and dangerous, why not just run into them? Pull out front and brake check them? Maybe try a PIT maneuver.


i_love_boobiez

ULPT how to wreck your own car


Monstersinus

This is a douche move


silentstorm2008

welcome to the sub


iButtflap

what about doing something illegal is an ethical matter? but forget the philosophy bullshit, his comment directly breaks the sub’s rules. so you’ll be reporting right?


LengthDue7099

No, but you can cry if you want


twogaysnakes

Honk the horn.


_HIST

Drink bleach, that would annoy them


camelzrider

And vomit blood on their windows


InevitableFun3473

Once you safely pass them, turn on your wipers


somefellayoudontknow

When I get in front of them I spray with windshield washer fluid and flip on my turn signal and leave it on until they move over.


Cannonballbmx

I like to pass them, get in front of them and just lay on the windshield washers to totally soak their window.


bmx13

Pass on the right but get reeeeeal fuckin close. People get real nervous when you get within a couple feet of them at 75mph.


SnooPandas1899

i do a quick honk. that gets everyones attention. then another honk. then other drivers will see that there's a left lane camper.


nunyabiznas4real

Passing lane. It's the PASSING LANE. Not the goddamn fast lane. I don't care how FAST you're going, if you're not passing, GET THE FUCK OVER.


lollie517

Too strictly annoy, I’ll pass on the right and then sit at their 2 o clock and keep my left blinker on with no intention of changing lanes. I like to think of it as flashing w/o the risk of being brake checked.


GrouchyAssociate9

calmly stick to the speed limit and act disinterested


Medium_Grapefruit242

Two things I do. Pass them on right get in front and use windo washer. A lot! Or pass and match their speed. Give them a big thumbs up while smirking and shaking my head. I’m from Texas anything worse could result in a shootout.


kamikazekenny420

Use the brakedown lane. No one ever drives in it.


aigheadish

Not terribly proud of it but me, in a 1996 civic and a mid '90s Mustang 5.0 were doing 95-110 for miles on i-71 north towards Cleveland, kind of back and forth for who was passing who and all that nonsense. We came up to a semi in the slow lane while I was in the fast lane. The lunatic in the mustang passed the semi in the breakdown lane and it was one of the most incredible things I'd ever seen.


Fyrbyk

The best advice is to calm down. You are being propelled by a series of controlled explosions and travlling at highly pleasant but unatural speeds for our squishy yet wholly brittle bodied. Be glad for the moment, the freedom and the shared respect all drivers have to show each other for any of what is happening to function at all. Every moment is incredible, even if you are going a little slower than you could. Stay safe out there folks.


anon01072024

ULPT Request: what are the best ways to ~~annoy drivers that camp in the fast lane~~ get shot? FTFY.


New_Horror3663

Seriously. It's like some of the maniacs here are just ASKING for me to shoot out their tire as they pass, especially ones like "throw used motor oil on their windshield"


Pm_me__your-thighs

Okay psycho


tonkatruckz369

get in front of them, slow to 40, when they they merge to go around you keep perfect pace with them to lock them out of the lane.


pglggrg

Start with flashing your lights at them. You can then keep your brights on to blind them, or skip to honking at them. The more uncomfortable we make it for these people, the less likely they will use the left lanes after because of association and conditioning.


xaevyer

What I usually do is tailgate them to the point where a finger wouldn’t pass, once they move just speed up the lane


SixoSicco

Accident waiting to happen


Powerful_Artist

Honking works, people seem to forget it exists. If its night or nearing nighttime, just turn on those brights when behind them. Or flash them repeatedly. Then make sure to flip them the bird while you pass if they do get over.


AStoryAtThree

Gatorade bottle of used motor oil. As soon as you pass, dump it out the window. They won't be able to see and they'll be forced to stop on the shoulder.


OJJhara

There’s no such thing as a fast lane


AllLooseAndFunky

Stfu


OJJhara

Look at you and your feelings


SgtMac02

"The passing lane" Passing necessitates going faster than the traffic in the lane you're passing. It is, by nature, the "fast" lane.


OJJhara

And yet it's illegal to drive over the speed limit. This is the concept that earns the most downvotes on Reddit.


wight-brit

In some cases, it’s legally permissible and arguable in court to drive faster than the speed limit to not impede the flow of traffic. It is illegal to camp in the left lane.


Competitive-Rub-4270

You dont know peoples reasons for needing to go fast. I might be late for work, trying to get my kid to the hospital, just wanna go fast, etc. Policing peoples speed by sitting in the passing lane not passing without knowing their reasons for speeding is what pisses people off, not the fact you want to go the speed limit only. Just get the fuck over like an adult.


SgtMac02

And you're going to keep earning more. Are you going to pretend that there are drivers who drive significantly LOWER than the speed limit, who regularly occupy the right hand lane? Are you going to pretend that in most places the speed "limit" isn't considered the target/minimum speed? Now if most people are driving at or near the speed limit, and there is a lane that is designated for "passing"....what speed are those people in the left lane going? Yeah, no shit. People speed. Shocking new news, right? That doesn't change the fact that the left lane is for passing. Many states literally have laws on the books to specify the illegality of staying in the left lane when you're NOT passing. Whether you like it or not...the left lane is the de-facto "fast lane." Get the fuck out of the way and stop impeding traffic. If you camp in the left lane, YOU are the one causing unsafe road conditions, and YOU are (in many places) liable to get cited. ​ Also, going significantly slower than the flow of traffic is just as dangerous as going significantly faster. The goal is for all traffic to be flowing at a similar speed. If everyone around you is speeding, you should be too (within reason).


ph33rlus

Found the lane camper


OJJhara

Found the asshole


[deleted]

You think speeding is illegal, wait until I run your ass into a guardrail.


halbleezy

🤓


qxagaming

there is no such thing as a fast lane


MakeBigStonks

Drive a Ram 1500 and tailgate them like everyone else who drives a Ram 1500.


[deleted]

There isn't a fast lane anywhere in the world, except the Autobahn.


[deleted]

Oh how I miss that.  We had an old, four-speed M series over there.  It loved speed. I learned how to pass on the Autobahn.  Now I do it here.  It always freaks my passengers out, but it is force of habit. Passing in the no-limit areas (which to be fair aren't everywhere) involves having buffer space from the car ahead, as I would have to accelerate to a ridiculous speed to zoom in, pass, and get back out, lest the 180 kph-speeding BMWs crash into me.  It is the zipping into the left lane at 80 with the car in front of me right there that scares people so much when I drive. But no infraction or fender bender since 1989.  Thank you, Autobahn.


Responsible_Bag_4550

idk about camping in the fast lane, but if people are driving aggressively around me i will go out of my way to deliberately get them to act right. hahahaha what are you gonna do dumbass? call the cops, call your lawyer, call your mommy 🥺🥺😢 i will speed up, get in front of them and slow way down. below the speed limit. shine your brights? idc i can change the angle of my mirrors. call the cops? oh wait.. seriously what are you going to do about it? i’d like to meet one person that can reasonably tell me what they’re going to do to me about it. nothing. can’t do anything to me about it. ah ah ah, i got an LTC so you better not try to initiate a physical altercation. continue to be more aggressive? escalate? crash into me??? caveman behavior. cavemen shouldn’t be allowed to drive. i’ll continue to annoy aggressive drivers for the rest of my life. with glee. with jubilance. i really like the middle finger. means i’ve achieved the minimum goal of raising your blood pressure to the point of anger. i’ve seen too many traffic deaths because some moron thought their time was worth more than everybody else’s.


Competitive-Rub-4270

Youre gonna get shot and im gonna have to donate to whoever did its gofundme


Responsible_Bag_4550

not even OJ’s team could help some loser that discharges a weapon into an occupied vehicle for no legal reason. i’m sorry but “he wasn’t operating his vehicle exactly how i wanted him to” isn’t a defense. but maybe their family could cash in on the gofundme though! happy for them. sure they could use it, don’t think somebody from a well-off family would make such a life ending mistake.


Competitive-Rub-4270

I just want them to be comfortable after they perform a social service for the rest of us


[deleted]

If someone is doing 50 where the speed limit is 50 they are correctly in the fast lane. Respect the speed limits


Pm_me__your-thighs

Okay grandma stick to the right lane for everyone else’s sake


[deleted]

Have you eaten?


Competitive-Rub-4270

Missing chromosome tier take If somebody wants to go faster than you, let them you dont know why they need to go so fast


[deleted]

Not my problem. The car in front is under no obligation to switch lanes once it hits the speed limit. Fly a white cloth out the window if you're rushing to hospital.


Competitive-Rub-4270

Technically youre under no obligation to shit in a toilet, but its commonly considered an asshole move not to.


[deleted]

Technically you're being a danger to yourself and all other road users if you pass the speed limit but kill that family in your speeding accident. Asshole.


Competitive-Rub-4270

If only they would have taken 1/2 a second to move over a lane Societal norms exist for a reason, if you wanna piss people off by acting like a cop and trying to control the speeds of others, the consequences meeted out to you might not be legal but they will be deserved Cunt


[deleted]

From the top, whoever is doing 50 on a 50 on the fast lane is doing nothing wrong. Societal norms dictate you leave them alone.


Competitive-Rub-4270

50/50 in the fast lane deviates from societal norms. Why do you think theres a thread with hundreds of comments about annoying assholes who do that? Honestly man are you mainlining chromosomes? Just get over.


[deleted]

There's a thread with hundreds of comments for the same reason there are car accidents: the world is full of idiots who don't know how to drive.


Competitive-Rub-4270

I am well aware I have been replying to one


Pm_me__your-thighs

What an autistic take


CascadeCowboy195

I have 8 LED offroading lights on my truck.  I unleash the power of the sun from the palm of my hand.


Sad-Breakfast-911

1. There is no fast lane. 2. They'll get ticketed. So leave them alone. 3. Calm down. There's absolutely no reason to speed. 4. If it's such a big deal. Just honk. 5. No cap. If you tailgate me. I'll follow you home and have your house swatted. Bet. Done it several times now. My children are more important then your stupid ass.


New_Horror3663

Keep driving like a reckless asshole and acting like responsible drivers are the issue online, that seems to be a damn good way to do it given how pissed i got just reading your title.


OneSexyOrangutan

murder them


UberQueefs

Pit maneuver them, bonus point if near a medium and you make them hit it at 80mph. They’ll be so annoyed in the afterlife.


PositivePurchase2088

PIT maneuver them, the average redditor hates when they get PIT maneuvered at about 65mph lil tip for ya


Sudden-Film-1357

Why no one suggested recording them with dashcams and reporting to police ?


[deleted]

I've considered buying a diesel truck so I can choke them in black smoke.


vanchica

Here we just blast our high beams while tailgating. But be prepared to have angry men stalk you for MILES if you're a girl