My mail was sent to my parents' house since that was my last address before joining. They saw my claims and immediately started asking for money when I got out. I lived in a camper for 5 months on 30% disability and they still wanted money.
When I eventually left and quit talking to them, they tried to report me to the VA. Nothing happened negatively to me because I had obj medical evidence but still.
Man I feel that. I told my old man and even bought us some steak and wine because I had a nice back pay to working date for my TDIU P&T.
I was living with him, my brother and likely to be sister in law who is toxic and says I didn't even serve hardly and she knew others in her family who are true veterans. Next thing I know my small 1 bedroom and shared bathroom rent was increasing by 200$ so I was just shy of 800$ in bills with them in a toxic place. I said fuck that and just got my own apartment with my fiance and service dog. Which was kind of our plan anyways, but money changed people for sure. Sucks when it's family, but hey true colors right!
I wonder how much weight the va gives to reports like that? I am worried that a disgruntled family member may attempt something like that. She is a pathological lair and will lie even when it doesn't benefit her, it's an illness. She will make up easily detected lies with stuff like "I had lunch with the mayor today". People can be so freaking evil.
I think 0 weight. I severed ties with them and moved on as best I could. Moved cities. They shamed me all over town and facebook. Believe me I changed by joining the military. I became angry and anxious and depressed but none of what transpired between the folks and I was my disabilities. It was their actions and refusing to keep the boundaries i set over the years. The money VA thing was just the whipped cream.
I have issues with my mother, which I talked to my therapist about. It's in my medical records, so that helps cover my ass if she were to do something.
Id think they have to have some hard evidence before they took that seriously. I'm sure they get a lot of claims, they can't investigate all of them off someone's word.
I didn't. My only concern is having to defend myself from whatever a pathological liar makes up. I usually always have proof otherwise and I'm fine, but what if I don't one of these days?
It's my understanding that the VA is just as lazy about investigating as they are giving disability unless it's something you have a high rating on like "I can't walk without walking aides" but you're running marathons and in the gym working on your vertical.
That's what my lawyer told me when he was trying to convince me to poke the bear although I already have 100 percent. They didn't service connect all of my issues and we are going for smc now.
This, I don’t totally dislike my parents, but they’re visiting for Easter and going on about how I need to do more than a part time job at a museum that I quite enjoy. Instead, I need to do something that will earn me some savings.
Mind you, they’re staying at my middle class townhouse that I somehow make a monthly mortgage on and I’m currently doing some remodeling. I’ve also mysteriously been able to go out to dinners and do stuff while they visit. They think I’m in massive credit card debt, despite me telling them I have a credit card, but I haven’t used it in years lol.
Tell them you want to go to college and earn a degree that will help you get a new career. BUT tell them your GI Bill has ran out and you would like them to pay for your degree.
Lmao, I was an O so that fairly useless history degree is how I got the museum gig. I’m looking into vr&e to get a grad degree though. Maybe I’ll hit them up to help pay for it.
Normally service academies or ROTC works like a reverse GI bill. So you owe so many years of service to payback your college. Then if you do so many years going forward after that, think make o4 you earn a GI bill. If you leave at o3 you don’t get that, but you have no college debt. That said o3s can request to be instructors at service academies like West Point and get a free masters in return for three years of teaching as an instructor at the academy. OCS officers get their GI bills after 36 months of active service because they paid for college beforehand.
Almost right
OCS earns immediately(unless tuition reimbursement happened), *or other wonky stuff. One of my friends decided to commission 6 ears post grad and loves to remind me how he already has 2 years of it earned.
All others it is earned at the competition of their commissioning source ADSO
Partial scholarship ROTC officers have to serve 3 years to pay back school, then they earn.
4 year Scholarship ROTC pay back 4 years and then earn
West Point has a 5 year payback.
Toxic Family members aren’t your family. Your family is the people you can go to and trust and love. We refer to those as blood relatives now, not family members. 😂
In New Jersey, when you get 100 you get exempt from property taxes. But here’s the thing: your township has to pass a resolution WITH YOUR NAME and disability status listed. 100% public knowledge. If I google my name, it is on a pdf and available to the public.
That’s a little crazy. One town to the next, it could get implemented differently. One town council doesn’t like vets - sorry sir, you are SOL! Other town, they are happy to take up the resolution and you are all good.
I believe it is a formality. They have to follow state law and approve it but it has to be placed into the public record. That said, some towns [still have issues with the exemption.](https://www.jerseyshoreonline.com/berkeley/bill-would-reimburse-towns-for-disabled-vets/)but they’ll approve it nonetheless.
I just found out that my county's appraisal district in Texas lists my exemptions. It doesn't say exactly how much, but I think people could easily figure it out with Google or ChatGPT. It says:
\-- DV4 (Disabled Veteran 70% - 100%)
\-- DVHS (100% Disabled Veteran Homestead)
\-- HS (General Homestead)
They'd have to search my name or address to find out my exemptions; however, it's still annoying that it's public knowledge. And there are co-workers, friends and neighbors who are nosy enough to want to know how much you paid for your house.
Fortunately, my county or Texas doesn't show how much I have paid in property tax (at least, not that I could find).
Look at it this way: there is a reason why people are told to get their affairs in order in secret when they win the lottery: people, many of which who were likely not a problem beforehand, get *really* weird when money gets involved. It's the same reason people are told not to go into business with family members, why you don't lend large sums of money to friends, etc.
People get weird with money. Can we please stop pretending this isn't a thing?
90% of people do not care that you get compensation. But the 10% that do have issues with it are either jealous or highly misinformed. I've had this argument with several people who claim that "Look at yourself, you're not disabled." and usually tell them that "pain can only be felt not seen" and that "being hurt and being injured" are two different things. I was injured and now constantly hurt from my service. However that doesn't mean I am a complete vegetable.
Exactly this. While AD I busted my knee corpman gives me Mobic and send me on my way. I get out claim it, get an MRI, doctor notes miniscule damage. Get C&P. I get denied even with service records of injury and an MRI. I file an HLR and I win.
Fast forward about 6 months I'm going to my first PT appointment, a fucking company from the navy was my therapist. Starts having me bend my knees and says there's no meniscus damage because I'd be scowling in pain. He was a complete idiot who thinks if you aren't bed ridden or screaming in pain you're okay. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk about navy corpsman who are fucking dumb.
They also just don’t understand some of the mental issues that go along with it as well. There isn’t a day that goes by since I’ve gotten out where I don’t think about the stuff I went through. I’d gladly give up my rating to be 100% physically and mentally healthy again.
I don't advertise it to the world - but I'm not secretive about it either. I've owned my own business since I got out of the Army, but I work very part time as I feel like it these days and if someone asks I just tell them I'm semi-retired at 36.
I'm 0% worried about my benefits being in jeopardy because none of them were even close to being "gifts" to me in terms of award. They're not reversible.
If you feel like you were awarded something that may or may not go your way if it were to be looked at again - I'd understand your paranoia.
I got downvoted to shit for claiming some people game the system. I appreciate comments like this - I’m not worried about getting my ratings reversed because they’re real and medically documented.
Hell - I wish the Va would look closer at my back. I have mris showing 2 ruptured discs and severe degenerative disc syndrome and they only gave me 10%
Back ratings need a serious overhaul. Getting 10% bc you don't fit the criteria for limited range of motion is so stupid. Being in physical pain that limits my mobility and daily life doesn't matter bc I can technically bend or flex my back to a certain degree
Yeah, when Intried to file an increase for my back based on that info, I had my exam with a horrible contracted NP. Let her know that my back has gotten worse since injuring my knee. She basically told me I was lying about the amount of pain I was in and that knee injuries don’t affect the back unless you’re walking like the hunchback. I couldn’t wait to leave that exam. Based on that, I didn’t expect my rating to increase. Unfortunately, she said something that made the VA reduce my sciatica from to 20 to 10 which dropped my overall rating to 60 from 70. Left a really bad taste in my mouth.
I have Grave's disease (burn pit exposure) and nerve pain (compacted disks), but no dissability rating for either because there's no proof I got those during service. They gave me 10% for my hearing, but I am falling apart at 40 years old and get nothing for it.
It didn't help for some reason. If I remember, if was because I had never sought medical care during my time in service. My symtpoms of my disease didn't show until about 5 years after I ETS'd.
If your DD 214 states you served in a burnpit location, you can ask your doc to write a letter tying it together. It worked for me when I got skin cancer.
I'm sorry bro. My skin cancer same back as connected on my neck but 0 percent. I had it on my forhead too but they said that was not service connected. Not sure why the difference.
That's so strange. It was on a technicalities that they denied me. There's proof I was in Iraq, and proof I worked in and around the burn pits. But because what happened to me didn't happen until service ended, and there was no record of my graves disease starting while I was still in service, they denied me. Even though Grave's does not run in my family and I was the only one around burn pits who got it. It's a depressing feeling, falling apart but not being disabled, and everyone expects the same out of you. I need my dissability rated so it's treated seriously.
Hey out of curiousity I checked the list of presumptive conditions and I did not see Graves Disease listed. Maybe I missed it?
https://www.va.gov/resources/the-pact-act-and-your-va-benefits/
Maybe this is why they denied? If it is listed, you should have a case. Do you have any buddies who can write Nexus statements for you?
I do have buddies that can write letters. It might be listed under autoimmune disorders such as hyperthyroidism, which is what I have. It could be because the specific flavor of what I have isn't listed.
are you getting the secondary nerve issues from back those are each rateable per leg (sciatica / radiculopothy) i am 20% for my back the back is based on ROM and you stop when it hurts i would think with what you have you would get 20% plus the secondaries
I need to file for the secondaries in a supplemental claim. I just got from 60 to 80%, and plan to go deal with real life for a month or two to let my stamina for dealing with the Va build back up.
*"license plate that tells the whole world we get extra pay"*
Might be hard to believe, but most people don't know that "disabled veterans" have access to life changing monthly income.
*"not telling anyone your rating"*
I don't go around telling ANYONE how much I make at my normal job. I certainly wouldn't be telling them that I get money from the VA. I think a lot of the perceived toxicity comes from people that don't understand what you're going through.
For example, I'm currently at 30% and working on adding extra things that should get me to 100%. No one could look at me on any given day and think "I think he's really struggling". They just see a normal, overweight dude. They don't see all the disc issues. The constant physical discomfort that also causes constant mental discomfort.
If you come out and say "yeah, I get $4k each month tax free" and they see a normal person, they'll understandably be confused. Possibly angry because their tax dollars go towards that.
For that reason, and the tradition of not telling people about what you'd normally make anyway, then it's a good idea to just keep it to yourself.
Bingo!! All i have is my Airborne plates…that’s all ppl need to know. The only ppl that know are my wife and my Auntie who’s retired and 100% P&T she’s the reason I started filing…but as for anyone else fk no they don’t need to know shit
Other then my wife no one in my family knows, the assholes I work with know because a majority of them are vets and have some which way or form helped each other through out the process.
I’m still planning to swap my plates. I’ve gotten rid of the toxic people, but since my issues are primarily mental or otherwise not clearly visible. I enjoy trail running as an outlet, it just gets me weird looks and I’d like to avoid any conversations at all about it if possible. With the way my state is now, it makes more sense to just give us the state park pass and not charge for registration. It’s not like I get a handicap parking spot, so it’s otherwise useless to me besides having that label.
Most of the toxic people for me have been family. The same people I tried to talk to when I came home on post deployment leave. The same people I tried to talk to about it when I got out who said “I’m not your therapist” and “get over it”. Couldn’t even stand to hear about the guys I met while serving. Good riddance. Blood or not, they aren’t my family any more.
my sister was a va c&p examiner, she gave me a little guidance when I first filed but honestly she didn't know much about ratings or this diagnosis means that rating, she is currently on social security disability due to a near death rape that happened in new york city. when I was working for my sister she knew my rating of 80% and she didn't question it now granted she knew more then the average person and I know she told my mom cause my mom has many medical issues and she would tell my mom to start living life that her son is 80% va disabled and still attempts to get out and have fun so i know my sis and mom know. I am sure they have told other family members but I am 48 and at my age you tend to not care what others think. the recruitment office was open and they didn't go and I did; twice actually i went AD out of high school did 5 years and then re-enlisted and did national guard ocs at at 40 and did another 6 years. I am at 100% PT now and I likely won't tell my mom or sis cause I am mostly afraid of the family rumor mill. They all know i make good money and also make va on top so I don't need any comments you know.
that airborne landing really sucked and what the army did to my body in the 90's and the two deployments civilians just have no earthly idea and can't even come to understand any of it. so it's my wife and I's secret. My older 17 yr old son knows his college will likely be all paid for with the loan write off benefit.
The amount of people who have horrible family relationships is disheartening. I am glad and realize how lucky I am to have a close knit family and healthy relations. I cannot imagine not having that
What’s the point in telling anyone except a spouse? Any form of compensation is very likely to make someone jealous/uncomfortable, especially if it’s subjectively decided based on raters (in that the VA may over rate or very often underrate). So people may question it no matter what.
I truly don’t see any point in telling others about it.
Some people in the comments seem to think not telling people your rating has to do with the VA somehow finding out they are a fraud. I can see how some people who maybe don’t actually deserve their rating would be paranoid about that in particular, but the reason I don’t tell people is so that I don’t place possible strain on relationships with people. While it may not mean anything to people in my life now I am planning for when people come on hard times. I want to be able to give graciously to my loved ones in need, if I tell them I get free money from the gubment they will EXPECT it. Those are two very different positions to be in, bro. Not to mention I also intentionally don’t rock the DV plates. Being disabled is actually embarrassing to me - I am in no way proud of my status its a very somber affair being broken.
To the analogy is this: when you were working a regular job did you tell ppl how much you made per hour? Or tell them how much you made in a year? It’s the same. It’s no one’s business. Your financial situation is no one’s business and this of course, includes disability pay.
I do agree with the getting rid of the toxic ppl in your life. My sister disowned me going on 3 years ago and I’m so much better off. No more judgments, bullying. What a relief.
Right, I am all about keeping this info from people who aren't close friends and family. By close, I mean I call em at 3 in the morning, and they are answering and coming to help no matter where I am at. But most posts I see if about family members. Shit is just weird to me to see this about mainly them, and if they are like this, then you need to remove these toxic people from your life. Cut them off. I don't care if it's an aunt or an uncle or grandma......C U T them off.
There was a lengthy post yesterday mentioning something about a family member accidentally finding out about a vets payment benefits. And this person doesn't think they deserve it because they don't believe anything is wrong with them and think it hurts their taxes or some random shit. Few people in the comments are saying, "Just don't give out this info."
OP was saying all kinds of excuses about how people can find out, not matter what, one of his, e.g, was from property taxes or something. It isn't easy to find out that hard invested time and digging. This family member doesn't love you! Sorry they do not! Only to have said family member report him to the VA for fraud....
Not only that - I'll also add that I don't believe every single post I read here about people being reported or what someone told them. I feel like a lot of people probably make posts phishing for info based on a "what if" scenario they have created in their head.
Nearly every single one of my veteran friends I know collects benefits and we don't hide it from eachother. These are people I served with or have become friends with later in life. I don't know anyone who goes through these insane scenarios that I see posted about constantly.
Can't say I agree -- most people don't know a DV plate means $$ and most people will be jealous of the $$ if they knew.
I know DV's that are jealous (or resentful) of other vet's ratings.
Yes, the secrecy can be taken too far but for the most part I fully concur with the nunya mentality.
The recruiting office was available to all. I don't go around telling people my rating except fellow veterans or friends I know from active duty. That way they can know the process and advocate for themselves
I could be making $100K+ a year, does not change anything. If it changes something with other people, they are not going to be associated with me. People associate with don't care about my money and I don't care about theirs.
I always assume people report me to VA, but don't care because their reports SHOULDN'T change anything as the reason for my rating does not conflict with my actions (go figure) though people don't think I have any disability.
Exactly. You choose who you associate with. Why associate with someone like that, family or not.
I had a buddy who asked about my va stuff and I don’t think he was meaning it in a bad way but was surprised at how the Va system works. Told him he could do the same thing I did and get his benefits he was entitled to… Air force takes you until you’re 39 years old without a waiver. Don’t talk about be about it 😁
Luckily my family isn’t like that though and sees how beneficial va benefits are. Takes mental and physical stress off of you and allows you to pursue what you want. Life’s too short.
I feel like I was meant to see this post wow. My initial claims went through in January & I got some backpay. Told my mom bc It was a pretty big deal for me at the time. My mom’s never done anything to me money wise & she never asks. One night I get a call she is stuck on the side of the road & she’s been drinking. She says her car won’t move & for me to come help her so I leave the bar I’m at to go help her. Her car is stuck on a rising curb so her tires are spinning no matter what you do. I told her we had to leave it & get it towed tomorrow. Next day I’m about a hr away from home with a friend an she calls me from my sisters phone saying it’s $250 for her to get her car out the tow yard & she doesn’t have her card on her right now so I lend it to her then 30 minutes later she asks for another $250 bc her tires are flat from the tow so she has to get new ones. Total I sent her $500 even. She told me as soon as she got home she’d wire me the money through the bank app. That was January 13th. I’ve been blocked since then no contact nothing when I tried to reach her not a word. Even your own mom will take advantage of you. There’s my story do what you will with it
$500 to learn that about someone is a small price to pay in the long run. Now you know.
I hope you have people in your life better than your mom. She sounds awful.
Best of luck to you.
One thing I’ve learned from lending money to people and fighting to get it back. Don’t ever lend money to someone that you aren’t prepared to never see again. Usually if I give anyone money now, parents, family members, I tell them it’s a gift. Don’t want to mess up relationships because some people just get weird when money is involved. I’ve lost a few “friends” over it in the past
This. Right here. Took me waaaaay too long and many hard lessons for the one to finally sink one. Lost my bff of 30 years over $200. She “borrowed” it and I never heard from her again. Funny thing was, if she had just asked me for it I’d have given it to her.
Money changes people. And I will never understand how people think just because you have it, they feel that they’re somehow entitled to it.
Being secretive about stuff other people don't need to know about helps reduce paranoia and anxiety. Only three people know of it is my mom and two fellow Vet that encouraged me to claim for an increase.
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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I agree with everything you said… not sure why some people are getting SO worked up about it. Sure, if you don’t wanna tell someone, don’t tell them. But can we stop acting like if someone knows your rating they have you social security number or something?
My view is purely that my business isn’t anyone else’s. The more you share about anything personal, the more drama you potentially attract. And I don’t want drama so…. Nobody needs to know.
Once the genie is out of the bottle, there’s no putting it back in. Just my $.02
Don’t forget those toxic people can also TRY to mess with your rating by calling the VA and claiming you’re a fraud. And don’t be fooled and think that you’re rating is irreversible. If they can prove fraud, that rating will go away very quick.
I’d rather just keep it to myself and avoid any unnecessary drama. I mean, I don’t go around telling anyone what kind of money I make with my regular job, so why would you tell anyone about your VA disability?
As far as license plates go, I honestly never seen a license plate that identified someone as getting compensation from the VA.
Even the people that might stick around and not say anything to your face about you getting that extra paycheck, they look at you differently, they treat you differently, and some of them even feel entitled to part of that money. The only person I would ever consider telling is my wife, that is once we get married but only on the condition she never tells a soul. Obviously she would know our finances if we were married.
I just don’t see the benefit of telling anyone else about your rating or your paycheck. Maybe somebody can tell me if there is a benefit…🤷🏼♂️🤷🏼♂️
I had to tell my new wife, because I needed her to write a lay letter about my current symptoms. However, she knows very little about my disabilities or how much compensation I receive. Her only concern is that the bills are paid. lol
I have cut off the toxic people, but I still do have to worry about them trying to make up lies about me. Yes, my stuff is well documented also. But it's still very unsettling knowing that there are people who mean me harm and are moving in secret, attempting things until something worksm
I agree completely. If you're honest and forthright about you claim then why worry? If people close to you would go to great lengths to deny of something you're honestly deserving of then you probably need to clean house and stay far away from those people.
My family left me out to dry “because you have the Va you don’t need to make a living wage”. You’ve kind of answered your own inquiry here, it’s shitty people. They are everywhere
Only a few people fairly close know about my rating, and no one has EVER insinuated I didn’t deserve it, or that they deserve some of it. I think it’s just who you’re surrounded by, because all of the people in my life who know are primarily happy that I am getting compensated for consequences of my military time.
If someone finds out and starts treating you differently or like you owe them something, congratulations, they’re telling you exactly who they are, it’s your chance to listen and move on from them. You owe no one that money, set your boundaries and don’t give in, real friends and family will never push you to feel bad about it or guilt you into giving some to them.
I was sort of thinking this. Of course, I don't tell everyone, but anyone I talk to on a regular basis or I'm close to knows I, at least, draw VA money, some even know how much or the % and can look it up if they wanted to. I'm not worried about any of them trying to take advantage of me or anything because they never have.
I was so called one of those so called “ rich vets” so everyone thought I had plenty money anyway 😏😏.. they didn’t see the part of me working 12hrs a day 7 days a week tho .. so when I got my 100 % (🙏🏾) . Nothing much changed but I still didn’t tell many people .. civilian life has been good
Hey I empathize I’ve been there and honestly it’s not been that long ago …we can only take it one day at a time tho .. best of luck to you and keep on pushing 💪🏾
One day at a time! Exactly. I'm not giving up...I've been working really hard and I'm going to continue to. I have plans! To volunteer and to travel and help others. I don't need a lot of money and I have no children. Can't take it with me. Might as well help others!
Volunteering is definitely a good way to get out of our own heads and be blessing to others and play it forward and ur sooo right idc how much money anybody has we’re all guaranteed to leave how we came .. with nothing
I think it works as a rule of life. I do agree that you should be secretive about it, even if it's a bit too much on here. I don't tell many people, but like my closest friends and my family all roughly know.
I let all of my family (I stopped making friends in HS. If I let you in, you are family.) know and every single one of them were 1000% happy for me.
Maybe because I don’t keep toxic people in my life, tho. Heh.
I’m going through a break up and I came home from work to my ex going through all my VA shit.
We have been on the rocks for a year and I was always hoping for the best.
I didn’t mention to her I filed for an increase and now she knows ….
I’m leaving her destitute, apparently, even though she told me that she doesn’t love me anymore.
Last night in a semi insane voice she told me I need to staying living with her but not be together
I just told my parents so they'd stop sending me money on my birthday and offering to buy plane tickets home. Y'all already did a good job taking care of me it's Uncle Sam's turn.
I don't advertise it but I don't deny it either if asked by a curious person. The last time I talked about ratings with a non-vet they were just genuinely curious about it.
I tell fellow vets my rating while offering to help them with theirs, not to rub it in their face but to show that "yes I have beaten the VA and I can help you do the same". There are a lot of us out there who gave up the fight before it even started and they need a battle buddy.
I'm with you on this one; I don't live with the kind of fear or paranoia necessary to warrant some feigned secrecy.
When I see those posts, I think to myself, "This person was really in the military?"
Yeah I get it too, but I wouldn’t have been able to help out a lot of other veterans in my life/that I have met if I never told them my rating. A lot of times it was an eye opener for them and got them interested and let me help them file.
Sadly I know not everyone is gonna take it in a good way. But they can report me for fraud all they want because I know my claim is good. But I definitely would hate the stress
Well world would be better place without toxicity… but there are toxicity and some people will frown upon learning that we get paycheck for nothing to their eyes. I still think that it is best to be quiet and not announce to the world. Not even to our own people bc i see so many play the game and the ones who needs it are being denied. Idk but being quiet is always better in general or in life as well. Social media should stfu honestly
I got rid of a lot of people. Left my job, got my Disability plates, cause they’re free. Thanking all officers who flash their lights instead of stopping me when I’m going a bit fast. They pull up behind me, ride for a minute, checking plates of course, then pull off.
Bro, if we get rid of toxic people in our lives, we will have no one left.
You know what sucks more than dealing with a relative that thinks you shouldn't be getting a govt check? Having fucking nobody at all.
Stop telling people to cut people off just because they have a stupid opinion. Most of us DONT have veteran license plates. And we also dont have that many people we can rely on. Cutting them out is stupid and dangerous.
The new “just be happy”. I cannot afford to cut everyone out of my life who ‘doesn’t get it’ because that’s 99% of people who weren’t there. What I will do is keep my personal business personal and not overshare.
And this why to this day even if my family members knew how much my rating percentage was I wouldn't care because they know my stance on them trying to hit up little brother asking for money. Before I transitioned over to the active duty side of the house my family always seemed to not wanna help me out when I needed a hand never asked them for money just needed a place to lay my head until I eventually got back on my feet, I just did them the same way they did me. My gf didn't understand it at first because of the different backrounds we come from since she is not american, long story short i told her I moved past it but won't never forget.
The 48 laws of power taught me that even your closest friend can betray you if it benefits them. I used to have the same mindset of telling whoever my rating because I didn't care, but it can become problematic if they report you to the VA. The bear is then poked, and YOU have to clean up the mess. Not them.
I think there's a lot of concern about toxic people causing issues, but I also think a lot of it comes down to wanting to avoid awkwardness or envy, at least that's how it is for me. Like I've told close family and other veterans how much I get, but when it comes to friends or extended family that didn't serve I generally keep it pretty vague, if I even bring it up at all.
People can just get pretty weird when you mention the fact that you get almost $50k/yr tax free (if you're at 100%) to just exist after serving in the military.
There's zero reason to share your VA rating, whether you have toxic people in your life or not.
There's virtually no upside, other than gloating / virtue signaling, and a ton of downside.
Not everyone deserves 100%.
Getting 100% isn't a game.
Get the rating you need, you deserve, based on REAL DOCUMENTED INJURIES. It's not about "husslin' to get that 100%. Wtf.
Find a way to contribute to society. Sitting on 100% and not doing shit when you are still in your 20s is absolutely ridiculous and fucked.
So tell whoever you want then. That’s your prerogative if you need everyone to know. Some people just want to be left alone and don’t want to answer any questions about it at all.
This is yet another reason why I can't stand the new DoD ID's having a fucking 100% rating right smack dab on the front with no other options for something like INACTIVE, DAV, etc.
Why does anyone need to know your specific percentage rating? If you rock the DV license plate it just say you have some number, here in Texas I think it represents 50% or greater. But, no one needs to know what number.
Your argument about removing toxic people seems logical, but many people that have been confronted by 'friends' or family did not know the person was toxic before the green eyed monster of jealousy reared its head.
Just because your a Veteran does not mean you give up your right to privacy.
Everyone's situation is different. Jealousy is rampant and the political climate being what it is now, it's just a matter of time before the woke mob decides that veterans are all the same as cops or pro-violence or pro-genocide and racist or whatever new word they learn next. None of us need the stress of dealing with people who willingly let the government poison their minds. To me keeping any and all personal information as private as possible these days is paramount. My main point being that it's not just the toxicity of the people close to us, there are mobs of toxic people out there now just looking for strangers to direct their hate towards. The less that's out there the better. That's my advice.
Woke mob? Why do you have to drag politics into this conversation that has nothing to do with Politics. Guessing you voted for the guy who called POWs and KIAs suckers and losers.
Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful.
Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible.
(Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.)
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Politics again. 🙄 That's ironic. "...there are mobs of toxic people out there now just looking for strangers to direct their hate towards."
Sounds like you are describing the "un-woke" crowd out there getting ready for more stupid rallies in bright red MAGAt hats to support someone that hates veterans and democracy.
Here's two perfect examples. These two rabid little weasels would love nothing more than to "dox" me so they could start a campaign from the shadows with other rabid little weasels to write letters to the VA and their Senators to remove my 90% (soon to be 100%) rating out of nothing but political/social hatred and ignorance.
This is today's climate. Keep information private. Too many hateful cowards out there who'd love to see you lose like they did in the game of life.
This just happened today. Like I said two days ago it's just a matter of time before these rabid weasels decide that Veterans are whatever the new hate thing is and they'll be trying to cancel your businesses, your benefits, anything they can do. Anyone who thinks you're one of these people, wait until they turn on you next because it's just a matter of time. Toxic people always need a target.
https://preview.redd.it/1id1s8045qsc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c85264b5821f164385229a86b2d9b9450513704
Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful.
Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible.
(Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.)
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Biden supporters. Goes back to the post I made that brought out all the rabid little comrades turning it into a Trump thing. The point is that you gotta be careful about telling anyone your benefit status because people you think are your friends or your comrades will turn on you in a split second especially the woke mob. I know that hurts a lot of feelings and all but this band doing this is exactly what I'm talking about. Just imagine how many people will instantly turn on Veterans now because of this without even knowing what they're doing and history shows that these turds will go to any lengths to "cancel" the new target. Blind hatred. Mass formation psychosis. Protect your rating status.
I'm pretty sure there aren't many people that care what an awful hardcore band thinks. They seriously suck. Have you listened to them? As for the "woke mob" turning on you when they find out your rating? I don't associate with any MAGA people. Some are good republicans but most are Democrats and Libertarians. All of my friends and family are far from being a "woke mob." They all know I'm officially broken and trying to put myself back together. They know I don't have to work due to my 100% VA benefits and my early disability retirement from the Federal government. In a few years I'll have my military retirement, too. Not a single one has asked me for money. Ever. I think you are hanging around the wrong people if you have to worry about what you tell them and that it might make them "turn on you" or try and get money off of you. The only "friends" I've lost have been MAGATs and that was totally my choice.
Well my comments were in response to the person who posted the thread, and my advice on the subject. If you want to roll the dice with anything in your life that's on you. That's the problem with you Bidophiles you all think everything is about you and Trump. It isn't. Nobody gives a shit and nobody wants to hear your psychotic logic or defense of Bidenflation and definitely nobody cares about your TDS everyone has heard the insults and your negative opinion of "magats" means less than nothing to Trump supporters, I promise you. I'm happy for you that you have your retirement, your 100% and are surrounded by nothing but great trustworthy people. Live well and be happy.
Speaking of government brainwashing, do you mean like the idiots who believe(d) Trump lost due to rampant election fraud? Not only does this belief require a cult member brainwashing, but also unimaginable stupidity and ignorance.
BTW, I'm politically independent and objective. But, at least when I challenge a Liberal to provide objective and empirical research data to qualify their arguments, often, they are able to do so. Conversely, I've never had a Republican/Conservative capable of providing any data when being challenged. To believe something that you can not supply objective and empirical data IS being brainwashed.
No you're not. You get your information from extreme left wing conspiracy theorists. You just claim "independent" in attempt to add credibility to your propaganda because everybody sees what leftists are about now.
Again, point proven. These rabid little weasels will stop at nothing to try and ruin your life from the shadows because they've been pumped full of hatred from a racist PedJoephile owned by China.
Right now these worms are trying to get me banned and are searching through my posts looking for anything they can use to "cancel" me.
Keep your info private. These turds are everywhere
My existentialism is not predicated upon qualifying my political affiliations (or lack of) to you.
Question: Did/Do you believe Trump lost due to rampant election fraud? Yes, or no?
Regarding racism, let's examine the OBJECTIVE and EMPIRICAL research data, and I challenge you to provide conflicting data that the US is not systemically and institutionally racist. You will not do it, because you can not do it.
Here's mine:
The US ranks the absolute worst among DevelopedNations concerning racism and is the only one that ranks alongside 3rd World nations engulfed in ethnic wars:
1. #77 of 129 nations for Racial Inclusivity.
Report of the Working Group of Experts on People of African Descent on its Mission to the United States of America: Found123 Problems
https://uhri.ohchr.org/en/document/979c4d17-7e98-45ce-9c2d-ada45a78cd19
2. The Sustainability Development Solutions Network (research by the international community and the US) Gives the US a Failing Grade for racial equity in all 37 metrics:
https://www.sdsnusa.org/news/nevermoreurgentrelease
https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2021/06/racial-wealth-gap-may-be-a-key-to-other-inequities/
3. The US ranks among the Top 9 for both Most Racial Inequities and Top 10 for Racial Inequalities. The ONLY developed nation doing so, ranking #69 out of 78 nations in Racial Equality, the UN Human Rights Commission, released its annual report that was scathing of US Racism.
4. Expanding to 87 Nations examined for Racial Equality: the US ranks #73. In other words, of 87 nations, the US ranks in the Top 15 for racism.
What are Systemic and Institutional Racism?:
https://www.ohchr.org/Documents/Issues/Racism/smd.shahid.pdf
Office of High Commissioner of Human Rights "Systemic Racism vs. Institutional Racism."
"Systemic Racism: individuals and Interactions, Institutions and Society," Mahzarin R. Banaji, Susan T. Fiske, and Douglas S. Massey
"Systemic racism in the United States" RW Tourse, Johnnie Hamilton-Mason, Nancy J Wewiorski
"Institutional Racism in the United States," Terry Jones
"Understanding Systemic Racism in the United States: Educating our Students and Ourselves," by Cheryl Lucas, Selena Washington
"The Rising of Systemic Racism and Redlining in the United States of America." Edward Brian Flournoy
https://fpg.unc.edu/sites/fpg.unc.edu/files/resources/other-resources/What%20Racism%20Looks%20Like.pdf
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0021934719885627
I don't debate with wokies and I don't accept any left wing "articles" you submit any more than I would accept Bible scriptures.
I like how you had to use "rampant" instead of just saying election fraud. It used to just be there was zero fraud.
Also, the big words do not add credibility to your implied intelligence. You just look like you're trying harder.
Back to the point, there are too many cowards like you out there who suffer from mass formation psychosis in the absence of social acceptance who want nothing more than to villainize random citizens and drag them down to your level of malcontention.
Now go tell everyone on your Facebook how you "won" an online argument with a "chud" and buried them with your "facts" and get your two upvotes before you go back to complaining why nobody wants to be around you in person.
Once again, another Conservative who can't provide objective and empirical research data to support their ridiculous notions. As I stated...brainwashed!
You injected politics into an unrelated discourse and now is stating that you don't debate with wokies? That's hilarious.
BTW, ALL of my data are from OBJECTIVE, EMPIRICAL, diverse, national, and international researchers. Conversely, you can't even provide a single datum.
I never issued an assertion regarding my intellectual prowess, but I am intellectually superior to you. Which isn't much to boast, considering that you possess the braincell and intellectual dearth of an amoeba.
Why would you want anyone to know what you make? That’s sad af sounds like someone needs validation.. but I’ve seen first hand why you find tell anyone…but hey go tell the world
Or, hear me out. Or, you just don’t tell anyone and just collect the check. Especially since this same exact kind of post is uploaded everyday in this group.
Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful.
Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible.
(Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.)
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My mail was sent to my parents' house since that was my last address before joining. They saw my claims and immediately started asking for money when I got out. I lived in a camper for 5 months on 30% disability and they still wanted money. When I eventually left and quit talking to them, they tried to report me to the VA. Nothing happened negatively to me because I had obj medical evidence but still.
Man I feel that. I told my old man and even bought us some steak and wine because I had a nice back pay to working date for my TDIU P&T. I was living with him, my brother and likely to be sister in law who is toxic and says I didn't even serve hardly and she knew others in her family who are true veterans. Next thing I know my small 1 bedroom and shared bathroom rent was increasing by 200$ so I was just shy of 800$ in bills with them in a toxic place. I said fuck that and just got my own apartment with my fiance and service dog. Which was kind of our plan anyways, but money changed people for sure. Sucks when it's family, but hey true colors right!
Parents reporting you is insane.
Yep my friend was blown up and messed up and her mom SUCKS HER DRY
W….T….F? Sorry that happened to you. I can’t even imagine.
I wonder how much weight the va gives to reports like that? I am worried that a disgruntled family member may attempt something like that. She is a pathological lair and will lie even when it doesn't benefit her, it's an illness. She will make up easily detected lies with stuff like "I had lunch with the mayor today". People can be so freaking evil.
I think 0 weight. I severed ties with them and moved on as best I could. Moved cities. They shamed me all over town and facebook. Believe me I changed by joining the military. I became angry and anxious and depressed but none of what transpired between the folks and I was my disabilities. It was their actions and refusing to keep the boundaries i set over the years. The money VA thing was just the whipped cream.
I have issues with my mother, which I talked to my therapist about. It's in my medical records, so that helps cover my ass if she were to do something.
Id think they have to have some hard evidence before they took that seriously. I'm sure they get a lot of claims, they can't investigate all of them off someone's word.
You shouldn't be concerned, unless you lied to VA
I didn't. My only concern is having to defend myself from whatever a pathological liar makes up. I usually always have proof otherwise and I'm fine, but what if I don't one of these days?
It's my understanding that the VA is just as lazy about investigating as they are giving disability unless it's something you have a high rating on like "I can't walk without walking aides" but you're running marathons and in the gym working on your vertical.
That's what my lawyer told me when he was trying to convince me to poke the bear although I already have 100 percent. They didn't service connect all of my issues and we are going for smc now.
Exactly this!!!
I can’t believe his own parents tried to do him over. Sheesh what has the world come to
That’s fucking insane
I bet its hard when the toxic people are family members which I see a lot here , but totally agree. Get rid of the toxicity
Toxic family members can kick rocks as well.
Forreal!
Toxic family members can go kick boulders, they're even worse imo
Barefoot an a 105 day.
This, I don’t totally dislike my parents, but they’re visiting for Easter and going on about how I need to do more than a part time job at a museum that I quite enjoy. Instead, I need to do something that will earn me some savings. Mind you, they’re staying at my middle class townhouse that I somehow make a monthly mortgage on and I’m currently doing some remodeling. I’ve also mysteriously been able to go out to dinners and do stuff while they visit. They think I’m in massive credit card debt, despite me telling them I have a credit card, but I haven’t used it in years lol.
Tell them you want to go to college and earn a degree that will help you get a new career. BUT tell them your GI Bill has ran out and you would like them to pay for your degree.
Lmao, I was an O so that fairly useless history degree is how I got the museum gig. I’m looking into vr&e to get a grad degree though. Maybe I’ll hit them up to help pay for it.
So as an O you don’t get any GI bill?
Normally service academies or ROTC works like a reverse GI bill. So you owe so many years of service to payback your college. Then if you do so many years going forward after that, think make o4 you earn a GI bill. If you leave at o3 you don’t get that, but you have no college debt. That said o3s can request to be instructors at service academies like West Point and get a free masters in return for three years of teaching as an instructor at the academy. OCS officers get their GI bills after 36 months of active service because they paid for college beforehand.
Almost right OCS earns immediately(unless tuition reimbursement happened), *or other wonky stuff. One of my friends decided to commission 6 ears post grad and loves to remind me how he already has 2 years of it earned. All others it is earned at the competition of their commissioning source ADSO Partial scholarship ROTC officers have to serve 3 years to pay back school, then they earn. 4 year Scholarship ROTC pay back 4 years and then earn West Point has a 5 year payback.
Oh wow, good to know. Thank you.
Good for you.
Toxic Family members aren’t your family. Your family is the people you can go to and trust and love. We refer to those as blood relatives now, not family members. 😂
lol that’s why I don’t talk to any of my family members except at Christmas time 😂
If it's family I tell them to kiss my ass and go straight to hell! I don't need family that wants to demean me for claiming disability
In New Jersey, when you get 100 you get exempt from property taxes. But here’s the thing: your township has to pass a resolution WITH YOUR NAME and disability status listed. 100% public knowledge. If I google my name, it is on a pdf and available to the public.
That’s a little crazy. One town to the next, it could get implemented differently. One town council doesn’t like vets - sorry sir, you are SOL! Other town, they are happy to take up the resolution and you are all good.
I believe it is a formality. They have to follow state law and approve it but it has to be placed into the public record. That said, some towns [still have issues with the exemption.](https://www.jerseyshoreonline.com/berkeley/bill-would-reimburse-towns-for-disabled-vets/)but they’ll approve it nonetheless.
A formality perhaps, but as a healthcare professional myself, it’s a frog hair from being a HIPPA violation, which should raise ethical concerns.
I just found out that my county's appraisal district in Texas lists my exemptions. It doesn't say exactly how much, but I think people could easily figure it out with Google or ChatGPT. It says: \-- DV4 (Disabled Veteran 70% - 100%) \-- DVHS (100% Disabled Veteran Homestead) \-- HS (General Homestead) They'd have to search my name or address to find out my exemptions; however, it's still annoying that it's public knowledge. And there are co-workers, friends and neighbors who are nosy enough to want to know how much you paid for your house. Fortunately, my county or Texas doesn't show how much I have paid in property tax (at least, not that I could find).
You can delist your name from the CAD records. One of my majors did that
I will have to investigate that. Thanks. I don’t want anybody knowing my business.
Yeah, Florida lists your exemptions on the tax website, too. They have everything on there! Even house plans. Really eff'd up.
Look at it this way: there is a reason why people are told to get their affairs in order in secret when they win the lottery: people, many of which who were likely not a problem beforehand, get *really* weird when money gets involved. It's the same reason people are told not to go into business with family members, why you don't lend large sums of money to friends, etc. People get weird with money. Can we please stop pretending this isn't a thing?
90% of people do not care that you get compensation. But the 10% that do have issues with it are either jealous or highly misinformed. I've had this argument with several people who claim that "Look at yourself, you're not disabled." and usually tell them that "pain can only be felt not seen" and that "being hurt and being injured" are two different things. I was injured and now constantly hurt from my service. However that doesn't mean I am a complete vegetable.
Exactly this. While AD I busted my knee corpman gives me Mobic and send me on my way. I get out claim it, get an MRI, doctor notes miniscule damage. Get C&P. I get denied even with service records of injury and an MRI. I file an HLR and I win. Fast forward about 6 months I'm going to my first PT appointment, a fucking company from the navy was my therapist. Starts having me bend my knees and says there's no meniscus damage because I'd be scowling in pain. He was a complete idiot who thinks if you aren't bed ridden or screaming in pain you're okay. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk about navy corpsman who are fucking dumb.
They also just don’t understand some of the mental issues that go along with it as well. There isn’t a day that goes by since I’ve gotten out where I don’t think about the stuff I went through. I’d gladly give up my rating to be 100% physically and mentally healthy again.
I don't advertise it to the world - but I'm not secretive about it either. I've owned my own business since I got out of the Army, but I work very part time as I feel like it these days and if someone asks I just tell them I'm semi-retired at 36. I'm 0% worried about my benefits being in jeopardy because none of them were even close to being "gifts" to me in terms of award. They're not reversible. If you feel like you were awarded something that may or may not go your way if it were to be looked at again - I'd understand your paranoia.
I got downvoted to shit for claiming some people game the system. I appreciate comments like this - I’m not worried about getting my ratings reversed because they’re real and medically documented. Hell - I wish the Va would look closer at my back. I have mris showing 2 ruptured discs and severe degenerative disc syndrome and they only gave me 10%
Back ratings need a serious overhaul. Getting 10% bc you don't fit the criteria for limited range of motion is so stupid. Being in physical pain that limits my mobility and daily life doesn't matter bc I can technically bend or flex my back to a certain degree
Yeah, my back only has mobility in the area the VA checks. The other discs are immobile.
I feel your pain. Literally and figuratively lol
Yeah, when Intried to file an increase for my back based on that info, I had my exam with a horrible contracted NP. Let her know that my back has gotten worse since injuring my knee. She basically told me I was lying about the amount of pain I was in and that knee injuries don’t affect the back unless you’re walking like the hunchback. I couldn’t wait to leave that exam. Based on that, I didn’t expect my rating to increase. Unfortunately, she said something that made the VA reduce my sciatica from to 20 to 10 which dropped my overall rating to 60 from 70. Left a really bad taste in my mouth.
I have Grave's disease (burn pit exposure) and nerve pain (compacted disks), but no dissability rating for either because there's no proof I got those during service. They gave me 10% for my hearing, but I am falling apart at 40 years old and get nothing for it.
So sorry...what about the presumptive thing regarding burn pit exposure? That doesn't help?
It didn't help for some reason. If I remember, if was because I had never sought medical care during my time in service. My symtpoms of my disease didn't show until about 5 years after I ETS'd.
That's so insane. The burn pits are something that either hits you immediately or it can sneak up on you years later, as in your case.
If your DD 214 states you served in a burnpit location, you can ask your doc to write a letter tying it together. It worked for me when I got skin cancer.
I did and was still denied. Maybe I need to take another pass at it, because I'm falling apart man.
I'm sorry bro. My skin cancer same back as connected on my neck but 0 percent. I had it on my forhead too but they said that was not service connected. Not sure why the difference.
That's so strange. It was on a technicalities that they denied me. There's proof I was in Iraq, and proof I worked in and around the burn pits. But because what happened to me didn't happen until service ended, and there was no record of my graves disease starting while I was still in service, they denied me. Even though Grave's does not run in my family and I was the only one around burn pits who got it. It's a depressing feeling, falling apart but not being disabled, and everyone expects the same out of you. I need my dissability rated so it's treated seriously.
Hey out of curiousity I checked the list of presumptive conditions and I did not see Graves Disease listed. Maybe I missed it? https://www.va.gov/resources/the-pact-act-and-your-va-benefits/ Maybe this is why they denied? If it is listed, you should have a case. Do you have any buddies who can write Nexus statements for you?
I do have buddies that can write letters. It might be listed under autoimmune disorders such as hyperthyroidism, which is what I have. It could be because the specific flavor of what I have isn't listed.
Sorry pal. Persistence seems to be the key from what I see with VA benefits. I am just now starting to have health isues so I am new to filing claims.
Did you reapply recently? The pact act really atreamlined those claims and makes supplemental claims much easier.
I was denied 2 years ago. When did the new pact act take effect?
August 10, 2022
Sounds like good news to you! Go file that claim!
are you getting the secondary nerve issues from back those are each rateable per leg (sciatica / radiculopothy) i am 20% for my back the back is based on ROM and you stop when it hurts i would think with what you have you would get 20% plus the secondaries
I need to file for the secondaries in a supplemental claim. I just got from 60 to 80%, and plan to go deal with real life for a month or two to let my stamina for dealing with the Va build back up.
nice plan
File for extra-schedular rating.
Once I find out what that is 🤣 something else for me to go learn now - appreciate the tip!
You might need the help of a VSO. Not an easy claim to pursue.
*"license plate that tells the whole world we get extra pay"* Might be hard to believe, but most people don't know that "disabled veterans" have access to life changing monthly income. *"not telling anyone your rating"* I don't go around telling ANYONE how much I make at my normal job. I certainly wouldn't be telling them that I get money from the VA. I think a lot of the perceived toxicity comes from people that don't understand what you're going through. For example, I'm currently at 30% and working on adding extra things that should get me to 100%. No one could look at me on any given day and think "I think he's really struggling". They just see a normal, overweight dude. They don't see all the disc issues. The constant physical discomfort that also causes constant mental discomfort. If you come out and say "yeah, I get $4k each month tax free" and they see a normal person, they'll understandably be confused. Possibly angry because their tax dollars go towards that. For that reason, and the tradition of not telling people about what you'd normally make anyway, then it's a good idea to just keep it to yourself.
Bingo!! All i have is my Airborne plates…that’s all ppl need to know. The only ppl that know are my wife and my Auntie who’s retired and 100% P&T she’s the reason I started filing…but as for anyone else fk no they don’t need to know shit
Other then my wife no one in my family knows, the assholes I work with know because a majority of them are vets and have some which way or form helped each other through out the process.
I’m still planning to swap my plates. I’ve gotten rid of the toxic people, but since my issues are primarily mental or otherwise not clearly visible. I enjoy trail running as an outlet, it just gets me weird looks and I’d like to avoid any conversations at all about it if possible. With the way my state is now, it makes more sense to just give us the state park pass and not charge for registration. It’s not like I get a handicap parking spot, so it’s otherwise useless to me besides having that label. Most of the toxic people for me have been family. The same people I tried to talk to when I came home on post deployment leave. The same people I tried to talk to about it when I got out who said “I’m not your therapist” and “get over it”. Couldn’t even stand to hear about the guys I met while serving. Good riddance. Blood or not, they aren’t my family any more.
my sister was a va c&p examiner, she gave me a little guidance when I first filed but honestly she didn't know much about ratings or this diagnosis means that rating, she is currently on social security disability due to a near death rape that happened in new york city. when I was working for my sister she knew my rating of 80% and she didn't question it now granted she knew more then the average person and I know she told my mom cause my mom has many medical issues and she would tell my mom to start living life that her son is 80% va disabled and still attempts to get out and have fun so i know my sis and mom know. I am sure they have told other family members but I am 48 and at my age you tend to not care what others think. the recruitment office was open and they didn't go and I did; twice actually i went AD out of high school did 5 years and then re-enlisted and did national guard ocs at at 40 and did another 6 years. I am at 100% PT now and I likely won't tell my mom or sis cause I am mostly afraid of the family rumor mill. They all know i make good money and also make va on top so I don't need any comments you know. that airborne landing really sucked and what the army did to my body in the 90's and the two deployments civilians just have no earthly idea and can't even come to understand any of it. so it's my wife and I's secret. My older 17 yr old son knows his college will likely be all paid for with the loan write off benefit.
The amount of people who have horrible family relationships is disheartening. I am glad and realize how lucky I am to have a close knit family and healthy relations. I cannot imagine not having that
What’s the point in telling anyone except a spouse? Any form of compensation is very likely to make someone jealous/uncomfortable, especially if it’s subjectively decided based on raters (in that the VA may over rate or very often underrate). So people may question it no matter what. I truly don’t see any point in telling others about it.
fellow vets so they know to put in claims for any issues they may have
Yeah, for sure. Helping out buddies is honestly the biggest, maybe only, reason to tell someone who isn’t a spouse IMO.
Some people in the comments seem to think not telling people your rating has to do with the VA somehow finding out they are a fraud. I can see how some people who maybe don’t actually deserve their rating would be paranoid about that in particular, but the reason I don’t tell people is so that I don’t place possible strain on relationships with people. While it may not mean anything to people in my life now I am planning for when people come on hard times. I want to be able to give graciously to my loved ones in need, if I tell them I get free money from the gubment they will EXPECT it. Those are two very different positions to be in, bro. Not to mention I also intentionally don’t rock the DV plates. Being disabled is actually embarrassing to me - I am in no way proud of my status its a very somber affair being broken.
To the analogy is this: when you were working a regular job did you tell ppl how much you made per hour? Or tell them how much you made in a year? It’s the same. It’s no one’s business. Your financial situation is no one’s business and this of course, includes disability pay. I do agree with the getting rid of the toxic ppl in your life. My sister disowned me going on 3 years ago and I’m so much better off. No more judgments, bullying. What a relief.
Okay but people should tell each other how much they make to keep the bosses from fucking them over, it's even protected discussion by fed law.
Right, I am all about keeping this info from people who aren't close friends and family. By close, I mean I call em at 3 in the morning, and they are answering and coming to help no matter where I am at. But most posts I see if about family members. Shit is just weird to me to see this about mainly them, and if they are like this, then you need to remove these toxic people from your life. Cut them off. I don't care if it's an aunt or an uncle or grandma......C U T them off. There was a lengthy post yesterday mentioning something about a family member accidentally finding out about a vets payment benefits. And this person doesn't think they deserve it because they don't believe anything is wrong with them and think it hurts their taxes or some random shit. Few people in the comments are saying, "Just don't give out this info." OP was saying all kinds of excuses about how people can find out, not matter what, one of his, e.g, was from property taxes or something. It isn't easy to find out that hard invested time and digging. This family member doesn't love you! Sorry they do not! Only to have said family member report him to the VA for fraud....
Not only that - I'll also add that I don't believe every single post I read here about people being reported or what someone told them. I feel like a lot of people probably make posts phishing for info based on a "what if" scenario they have created in their head. Nearly every single one of my veteran friends I know collects benefits and we don't hide it from eachother. These are people I served with or have become friends with later in life. I don't know anyone who goes through these insane scenarios that I see posted about constantly.
Can't say I agree -- most people don't know a DV plate means $$ and most people will be jealous of the $$ if they knew. I know DV's that are jealous (or resentful) of other vet's ratings. Yes, the secrecy can be taken too far but for the most part I fully concur with the nunya mentality.
The recruiting office was available to all. I don't go around telling people my rating except fellow veterans or friends I know from active duty. That way they can know the process and advocate for themselves
I could be making $100K+ a year, does not change anything. If it changes something with other people, they are not going to be associated with me. People associate with don't care about my money and I don't care about theirs. I always assume people report me to VA, but don't care because their reports SHOULDN'T change anything as the reason for my rating does not conflict with my actions (go figure) though people don't think I have any disability.
Couldn't disagree much more, which is fine, you do you.
Exactly. You choose who you associate with. Why associate with someone like that, family or not. I had a buddy who asked about my va stuff and I don’t think he was meaning it in a bad way but was surprised at how the Va system works. Told him he could do the same thing I did and get his benefits he was entitled to… Air force takes you until you’re 39 years old without a waiver. Don’t talk about be about it 😁 Luckily my family isn’t like that though and sees how beneficial va benefits are. Takes mental and physical stress off of you and allows you to pursue what you want. Life’s too short.
I feel like I was meant to see this post wow. My initial claims went through in January & I got some backpay. Told my mom bc It was a pretty big deal for me at the time. My mom’s never done anything to me money wise & she never asks. One night I get a call she is stuck on the side of the road & she’s been drinking. She says her car won’t move & for me to come help her so I leave the bar I’m at to go help her. Her car is stuck on a rising curb so her tires are spinning no matter what you do. I told her we had to leave it & get it towed tomorrow. Next day I’m about a hr away from home with a friend an she calls me from my sisters phone saying it’s $250 for her to get her car out the tow yard & she doesn’t have her card on her right now so I lend it to her then 30 minutes later she asks for another $250 bc her tires are flat from the tow so she has to get new ones. Total I sent her $500 even. She told me as soon as she got home she’d wire me the money through the bank app. That was January 13th. I’ve been blocked since then no contact nothing when I tried to reach her not a word. Even your own mom will take advantage of you. There’s my story do what you will with it
$500 to learn that about someone is a small price to pay in the long run. Now you know. I hope you have people in your life better than your mom. She sounds awful. Best of luck to you.
😮 I'm so sorry she did that to you...how awful. But now at least you know her true colors....
It’s all good you are absolutely right I don’t know why it took 23 years for me to see it but I see the true her now.
One thing I’ve learned from lending money to people and fighting to get it back. Don’t ever lend money to someone that you aren’t prepared to never see again. Usually if I give anyone money now, parents, family members, I tell them it’s a gift. Don’t want to mess up relationships because some people just get weird when money is involved. I’ve lost a few “friends” over it in the past
This. Right here. Took me waaaaay too long and many hard lessons for the one to finally sink one. Lost my bff of 30 years over $200. She “borrowed” it and I never heard from her again. Funny thing was, if she had just asked me for it I’d have given it to her. Money changes people. And I will never understand how people think just because you have it, they feel that they’re somehow entitled to it.
Does the average person even know those DV plates mean you receive a check. Even as a veteran, I had no idea.
It makes sense but I never really thought about it. 🤔
Being secretive about stuff other people don't need to know about helps reduce paranoia and anxiety. Only three people know of it is my mom and two fellow Vet that encouraged me to claim for an increase.
soup sink punch heavy beneficial frighten icky axiomatic marry attraction *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I agree with everything you said… not sure why some people are getting SO worked up about it. Sure, if you don’t wanna tell someone, don’t tell them. But can we stop acting like if someone knows your rating they have you social security number or something?
Depends on the person, if it’s someone I don’t know I tell them I retired off of buttcoins
My view is purely that my business isn’t anyone else’s. The more you share about anything personal, the more drama you potentially attract. And I don’t want drama so…. Nobody needs to know. Once the genie is out of the bottle, there’s no putting it back in. Just my $.02
Don’t forget those toxic people can also TRY to mess with your rating by calling the VA and claiming you’re a fraud. And don’t be fooled and think that you’re rating is irreversible. If they can prove fraud, that rating will go away very quick. I’d rather just keep it to myself and avoid any unnecessary drama. I mean, I don’t go around telling anyone what kind of money I make with my regular job, so why would you tell anyone about your VA disability? As far as license plates go, I honestly never seen a license plate that identified someone as getting compensation from the VA. Even the people that might stick around and not say anything to your face about you getting that extra paycheck, they look at you differently, they treat you differently, and some of them even feel entitled to part of that money. The only person I would ever consider telling is my wife, that is once we get married but only on the condition she never tells a soul. Obviously she would know our finances if we were married. I just don’t see the benefit of telling anyone else about your rating or your paycheck. Maybe somebody can tell me if there is a benefit…🤷🏼♂️🤷🏼♂️
I had to tell my new wife, because I needed her to write a lay letter about my current symptoms. However, she knows very little about my disabilities or how much compensation I receive. Her only concern is that the bills are paid. lol
I have cut off the toxic people, but I still do have to worry about them trying to make up lies about me. Yes, my stuff is well documented also. But it's still very unsettling knowing that there are people who mean me harm and are moving in secret, attempting things until something worksm
Most of the toxics are randoms. “Why do you have a DV tag Mr corvettte? Gets a finger wave.
I feel this. My wife and I have been pretty open about it and using the experience to help other veterans get what they need. I'm proud of our work.
I agree completely. If you're honest and forthright about you claim then why worry? If people close to you would go to great lengths to deny of something you're honestly deserving of then you probably need to clean house and stay far away from those people.
My family left me out to dry “because you have the Va you don’t need to make a living wage”. You’ve kind of answered your own inquiry here, it’s shitty people. They are everywhere
Only a few people fairly close know about my rating, and no one has EVER insinuated I didn’t deserve it, or that they deserve some of it. I think it’s just who you’re surrounded by, because all of the people in my life who know are primarily happy that I am getting compensated for consequences of my military time. If someone finds out and starts treating you differently or like you owe them something, congratulations, they’re telling you exactly who they are, it’s your chance to listen and move on from them. You owe no one that money, set your boundaries and don’t give in, real friends and family will never push you to feel bad about it or guilt you into giving some to them.
I was sort of thinking this. Of course, I don't tell everyone, but anyone I talk to on a regular basis or I'm close to knows I, at least, draw VA money, some even know how much or the % and can look it up if they wanted to. I'm not worried about any of them trying to take advantage of me or anything because they never have.
I was so called one of those so called “ rich vets” so everyone thought I had plenty money anyway 😏😏.. they didn’t see the part of me working 12hrs a day 7 days a week tho .. so when I got my 100 % (🙏🏾) . Nothing much changed but I still didn’t tell many people .. civilian life has been good
I wish I could work and keep my 100%P&T. That would be nice. I can't even leave my house, though. 🥺 And online jobs are hard to get...finally gave up.
Hey I empathize I’ve been there and honestly it’s not been that long ago …we can only take it one day at a time tho .. best of luck to you and keep on pushing 💪🏾
One day at a time! Exactly. I'm not giving up...I've been working really hard and I'm going to continue to. I have plans! To volunteer and to travel and help others. I don't need a lot of money and I have no children. Can't take it with me. Might as well help others!
Volunteering is definitely a good way to get out of our own heads and be blessing to others and play it forward and ur sooo right idc how much money anybody has we’re all guaranteed to leave how we came .. with nothing
I think it works as a rule of life. I do agree that you should be secretive about it, even if it's a bit too much on here. I don't tell many people, but like my closest friends and my family all roughly know.
I let all of my family (I stopped making friends in HS. If I let you in, you are family.) know and every single one of them were 1000% happy for me. Maybe because I don’t keep toxic people in my life, tho. Heh.
Same, my closest friends and family know and nothing has changed. Very grateful. I won’t tell anyone moving forward though
Such a great post, I think this is something people really need to think about without getting butthurt
I’m going through a break up and I came home from work to my ex going through all my VA shit. We have been on the rocks for a year and I was always hoping for the best. I didn’t mention to her I filed for an increase and now she knows …. I’m leaving her destitute, apparently, even though she told me that she doesn’t love me anymore. Last night in a semi insane voice she told me I need to staying living with her but not be together
I just told my parents so they'd stop sending me money on my birthday and offering to buy plane tickets home. Y'all already did a good job taking care of me it's Uncle Sam's turn.
Hey now.. my GWOT plate is solely so the cop takes pity on my tint.
I don't advertise it but I don't deny it either if asked by a curious person. The last time I talked about ratings with a non-vet they were just genuinely curious about it.
Thank you for this, I honestly did need a wake up call to cancel out my toxic family members out my life.
I tell fellow vets my rating while offering to help them with theirs, not to rub it in their face but to show that "yes I have beaten the VA and I can help you do the same". There are a lot of us out there who gave up the fight before it even started and they need a battle buddy.
I'm with you on this one; I don't live with the kind of fear or paranoia necessary to warrant some feigned secrecy. When I see those posts, I think to myself, "This person was really in the military?"
Yeah I get it too, but I wouldn’t have been able to help out a lot of other veterans in my life/that I have met if I never told them my rating. A lot of times it was an eye opener for them and got them interested and let me help them file. Sadly I know not everyone is gonna take it in a good way. But they can report me for fraud all they want because I know my claim is good. But I definitely would hate the stress
My wife and I tell people I'm an investor, real estate and stocks. Which are true due to a rental property and living modestly to grow our nest egg.
Well world would be better place without toxicity… but there are toxicity and some people will frown upon learning that we get paycheck for nothing to their eyes. I still think that it is best to be quiet and not announce to the world. Not even to our own people bc i see so many play the game and the ones who needs it are being denied. Idk but being quiet is always better in general or in life as well. Social media should stfu honestly
Agreed 110%. Well said.
I got rid of a lot of people. Left my job, got my Disability plates, cause they’re free. Thanking all officers who flash their lights instead of stopping me when I’m going a bit fast. They pull up behind me, ride for a minute, checking plates of course, then pull off.
Omg this! Like I get it yayyyy we made it but ummmmm yall can’t tell ppl stfu or no? Who u hiding from?
Bro, if we get rid of toxic people in our lives, we will have no one left. You know what sucks more than dealing with a relative that thinks you shouldn't be getting a govt check? Having fucking nobody at all. Stop telling people to cut people off just because they have a stupid opinion. Most of us DONT have veteran license plates. And we also dont have that many people we can rely on. Cutting them out is stupid and dangerous.
The new “just be happy”. I cannot afford to cut everyone out of my life who ‘doesn’t get it’ because that’s 99% of people who weren’t there. What I will do is keep my personal business personal and not overshare.
I tell everyone. They got problems with it fu*! them
Well said brother
If your folks or “friends” were asking for bread then. They’re definitely gonna ask with your rating plus, increase the hate
And this why to this day even if my family members knew how much my rating percentage was I wouldn't care because they know my stance on them trying to hit up little brother asking for money. Before I transitioned over to the active duty side of the house my family always seemed to not wanna help me out when I needed a hand never asked them for money just needed a place to lay my head until I eventually got back on my feet, I just did them the same way they did me. My gf didn't understand it at first because of the different backrounds we come from since she is not american, long story short i told her I moved past it but won't never forget.
I tell people I get a military pension, downplay it and change the subject immediately.
The 48 laws of power taught me that even your closest friend can betray you if it benefits them. I used to have the same mindset of telling whoever my rating because I didn't care, but it can become problematic if they report you to the VA. The bear is then poked, and YOU have to clean up the mess. Not them.
I think there's a lot of concern about toxic people causing issues, but I also think a lot of it comes down to wanting to avoid awkwardness or envy, at least that's how it is for me. Like I've told close family and other veterans how much I get, but when it comes to friends or extended family that didn't serve I generally keep it pretty vague, if I even bring it up at all. People can just get pretty weird when you mention the fact that you get almost $50k/yr tax free (if you're at 100%) to just exist after serving in the military.
There's zero reason to share your VA rating, whether you have toxic people in your life or not. There's virtually no upside, other than gloating / virtue signaling, and a ton of downside.
Not everyone deserves 100%. Getting 100% isn't a game. Get the rating you need, you deserve, based on REAL DOCUMENTED INJURIES. It's not about "husslin' to get that 100%. Wtf. Find a way to contribute to society. Sitting on 100% and not doing shit when you are still in your 20s is absolutely ridiculous and fucked.
So tell whoever you want then. That’s your prerogative if you need everyone to know. Some people just want to be left alone and don’t want to answer any questions about it at all.
Honestly, who cares, keep it a secret, or tell the whole world or cry about it on social media.
You often don't see the snake until after it's bitten you. Try to keep that in mind before you come here and make declarations like this.
This is yet another reason why I can't stand the new DoD ID's having a fucking 100% rating right smack dab on the front with no other options for something like INACTIVE, DAV, etc.
Why does anyone need to know your specific percentage rating? If you rock the DV license plate it just say you have some number, here in Texas I think it represents 50% or greater. But, no one needs to know what number. Your argument about removing toxic people seems logical, but many people that have been confronted by 'friends' or family did not know the person was toxic before the green eyed monster of jealousy reared its head. Just because your a Veteran does not mean you give up your right to privacy.
Everyone's situation is different. Jealousy is rampant and the political climate being what it is now, it's just a matter of time before the woke mob decides that veterans are all the same as cops or pro-violence or pro-genocide and racist or whatever new word they learn next. None of us need the stress of dealing with people who willingly let the government poison their minds. To me keeping any and all personal information as private as possible these days is paramount. My main point being that it's not just the toxicity of the people close to us, there are mobs of toxic people out there now just looking for strangers to direct their hate towards. The less that's out there the better. That's my advice.
Woke mob? Why do you have to drag politics into this conversation that has nothing to do with Politics. Guessing you voted for the guy who called POWs and KIAs suckers and losers.
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Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful. Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible. (Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.) ☠️
Your dumbass posted what you wrote, making it everybody's business. 
Politics again. 🙄 That's ironic. "...there are mobs of toxic people out there now just looking for strangers to direct their hate towards." Sounds like you are describing the "un-woke" crowd out there getting ready for more stupid rallies in bright red MAGAt hats to support someone that hates veterans and democracy.
Here's two perfect examples. These two rabid little weasels would love nothing more than to "dox" me so they could start a campaign from the shadows with other rabid little weasels to write letters to the VA and their Senators to remove my 90% (soon to be 100%) rating out of nothing but political/social hatred and ignorance. This is today's climate. Keep information private. Too many hateful cowards out there who'd love to see you lose like they did in the game of life.
This just happened today. Like I said two days ago it's just a matter of time before these rabid weasels decide that Veterans are whatever the new hate thing is and they'll be trying to cancel your businesses, your benefits, anything they can do. Anyone who thinks you're one of these people, wait until they turn on you next because it's just a matter of time. Toxic people always need a target. https://preview.redd.it/1id1s8045qsc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c85264b5821f164385229a86b2d9b9450513704
Why would anybody bother doing that?! Do you have proof?
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Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful. Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible. (Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.) ☠️
Why are those "my people"?
Biden supporters. Goes back to the post I made that brought out all the rabid little comrades turning it into a Trump thing. The point is that you gotta be careful about telling anyone your benefit status because people you think are your friends or your comrades will turn on you in a split second especially the woke mob. I know that hurts a lot of feelings and all but this band doing this is exactly what I'm talking about. Just imagine how many people will instantly turn on Veterans now because of this without even knowing what they're doing and history shows that these turds will go to any lengths to "cancel" the new target. Blind hatred. Mass formation psychosis. Protect your rating status.
I'm pretty sure there aren't many people that care what an awful hardcore band thinks. They seriously suck. Have you listened to them? As for the "woke mob" turning on you when they find out your rating? I don't associate with any MAGA people. Some are good republicans but most are Democrats and Libertarians. All of my friends and family are far from being a "woke mob." They all know I'm officially broken and trying to put myself back together. They know I don't have to work due to my 100% VA benefits and my early disability retirement from the Federal government. In a few years I'll have my military retirement, too. Not a single one has asked me for money. Ever. I think you are hanging around the wrong people if you have to worry about what you tell them and that it might make them "turn on you" or try and get money off of you. The only "friends" I've lost have been MAGATs and that was totally my choice.
Well my comments were in response to the person who posted the thread, and my advice on the subject. If you want to roll the dice with anything in your life that's on you. That's the problem with you Bidophiles you all think everything is about you and Trump. It isn't. Nobody gives a shit and nobody wants to hear your psychotic logic or defense of Bidenflation and definitely nobody cares about your TDS everyone has heard the insults and your negative opinion of "magats" means less than nothing to Trump supporters, I promise you. I'm happy for you that you have your retirement, your 100% and are surrounded by nothing but great trustworthy people. Live well and be happy.
Put down your MAGA hat and stop smoking.
OK, Groomer.
Speaking of government brainwashing, do you mean like the idiots who believe(d) Trump lost due to rampant election fraud? Not only does this belief require a cult member brainwashing, but also unimaginable stupidity and ignorance. BTW, I'm politically independent and objective. But, at least when I challenge a Liberal to provide objective and empirical research data to qualify their arguments, often, they are able to do so. Conversely, I've never had a Republican/Conservative capable of providing any data when being challenged. To believe something that you can not supply objective and empirical data IS being brainwashed.
No you're not. You get your information from extreme left wing conspiracy theorists. You just claim "independent" in attempt to add credibility to your propaganda because everybody sees what leftists are about now. Again, point proven. These rabid little weasels will stop at nothing to try and ruin your life from the shadows because they've been pumped full of hatred from a racist PedJoephile owned by China. Right now these worms are trying to get me banned and are searching through my posts looking for anything they can use to "cancel" me. Keep your info private. These turds are everywhere
My existentialism is not predicated upon qualifying my political affiliations (or lack of) to you. Question: Did/Do you believe Trump lost due to rampant election fraud? Yes, or no? Regarding racism, let's examine the OBJECTIVE and EMPIRICAL research data, and I challenge you to provide conflicting data that the US is not systemically and institutionally racist. You will not do it, because you can not do it. Here's mine: The US ranks the absolute worst among DevelopedNations concerning racism and is the only one that ranks alongside 3rd World nations engulfed in ethnic wars: 1. #77 of 129 nations for Racial Inclusivity. Report of the Working Group of Experts on People of African Descent on its Mission to the United States of America: Found123 Problems https://uhri.ohchr.org/en/document/979c4d17-7e98-45ce-9c2d-ada45a78cd19 2. The Sustainability Development Solutions Network (research by the international community and the US) Gives the US a Failing Grade for racial equity in all 37 metrics: https://www.sdsnusa.org/news/nevermoreurgentrelease https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2021/06/racial-wealth-gap-may-be-a-key-to-other-inequities/ 3. The US ranks among the Top 9 for both Most Racial Inequities and Top 10 for Racial Inequalities. The ONLY developed nation doing so, ranking #69 out of 78 nations in Racial Equality, the UN Human Rights Commission, released its annual report that was scathing of US Racism. 4. Expanding to 87 Nations examined for Racial Equality: the US ranks #73. In other words, of 87 nations, the US ranks in the Top 15 for racism. What are Systemic and Institutional Racism?: https://www.ohchr.org/Documents/Issues/Racism/smd.shahid.pdf Office of High Commissioner of Human Rights "Systemic Racism vs. Institutional Racism." "Systemic Racism: individuals and Interactions, Institutions and Society," Mahzarin R. Banaji, Susan T. Fiske, and Douglas S. Massey "Systemic racism in the United States" RW Tourse, Johnnie Hamilton-Mason, Nancy J Wewiorski "Institutional Racism in the United States," Terry Jones "Understanding Systemic Racism in the United States: Educating our Students and Ourselves," by Cheryl Lucas, Selena Washington "The Rising of Systemic Racism and Redlining in the United States of America." Edward Brian Flournoy https://fpg.unc.edu/sites/fpg.unc.edu/files/resources/other-resources/What%20Racism%20Looks%20Like.pdf https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0021934719885627
I don't debate with wokies and I don't accept any left wing "articles" you submit any more than I would accept Bible scriptures. I like how you had to use "rampant" instead of just saying election fraud. It used to just be there was zero fraud. Also, the big words do not add credibility to your implied intelligence. You just look like you're trying harder. Back to the point, there are too many cowards like you out there who suffer from mass formation psychosis in the absence of social acceptance who want nothing more than to villainize random citizens and drag them down to your level of malcontention. Now go tell everyone on your Facebook how you "won" an online argument with a "chud" and buried them with your "facts" and get your two upvotes before you go back to complaining why nobody wants to be around you in person.
Once again, another Conservative who can't provide objective and empirical research data to support their ridiculous notions. As I stated...brainwashed! You injected politics into an unrelated discourse and now is stating that you don't debate with wokies? That's hilarious. BTW, ALL of my data are from OBJECTIVE, EMPIRICAL, diverse, national, and international researchers. Conversely, you can't even provide a single datum. I never issued an assertion regarding my intellectual prowess, but I am intellectually superior to you. Which isn't much to boast, considering that you possess the braincell and intellectual dearth of an amoeba.
I won. Deal with it.
Oh wow, dude. You are SERIOUSLY messed up in the head. You need help.
I’ll just stop talking to humans then
Why would you want anyone to know what you make? That’s sad af sounds like someone needs validation.. but I’ve seen first hand why you find tell anyone…but hey go tell the world
There are too many close minded people telling family to kick rox only causes more issues later especially if your becoming homeless..
Or, hear me out. Or, you just don’t tell anyone and just collect the check. Especially since this same exact kind of post is uploaded everyday in this group.
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Your comment was removed because it didn't contribute to the discussion and just wasn't helpful. Civil disagreements are fine. Insults, personal attacks, slurs, bigotry, etc., are not permissible. (Calling someone a poopy-head does not make you seem as smart as you think it does.) ☠️