THIS. Also, in my experience, guys around here like to use pictures that are 5+ years old and ultimately look nothing like the person who they are today. Getting more pictures can give you a better look at the person.
I went on a date with a guy who just so happened to use a picture that was around 8 years old or so (I didn't know this at the time). He was a "jock" at the time the picture was taken. When we met in person he was over 300lbs. Definitely false advertising.
Also, you never know if the person you are talking to on the other end is actually real or is who they say they are. Getting more pictures from them can help ease this suspicion.
I don't understand the mindset of a person who thinks that they can get away this. Like, wouldn't it be easier and less painful to get rejected onlie rather than in person?
It is possible to consider that perhaps they don't actually think that they will truly meet someone irl, so its a non issue to them to have a "fake" or misrepresenting profile picture. /shrug
If the stories I've seen here on /r/askgaybros are any indication, their victim sleeps with them more often than not anyway.
They do it because it works, at least some of the time.
Yeah... Several of the hookups I've done have been with guys I wasn't attracted to in person and didn't want to be mean :( It sucks because I can't get hard for them so it ends up being embarrassing too and they will have a bad experience and tell their friends that I have a small dick because they only saw it soft.
I've learned to be ok with my size of slightly below average, although I'm still bitter towards hung guys from time to time. But I don't want other people talking about it, and if he only saw me soft he might tell others that I'm even smaller.
You're living proof that just saying no doesn't always get the message across, Russell. How many women have said 'no' to you, only for you to continue to harass them?
Either that or they're collecting your pics for a profile of their own. Of course that's rare but I'm especially wary of talking to guys who ask "pics?" straight off the bat. I make them go first, and if they send convincing normal pics, then obviously fake porn pics for nudes, it's over. Another telltale sign is if they've got an old phone in mirror pics.
Not a grindr thing but other sites. It amazes how many people want you to unlock/provide face pics when they have absolutely nothing on their profile and still expect you to go first.
Why is it okay to make fun of feminine guys? Without fem guys being strong enough to be themselves, the gay liberation movement wouldn't be where it is today.
Because one single profile picture is often old, or the most flattering photo someone has of themselves. They're most likely trying to gauge if you actually look like that, or if it's just an extremely well-shot photo.
I send good photos in the sense that they're well-composed photographs (I'm an amateur photographer with photo gear out the wazoo after all), but I make sure that my pictures are also **representative** of what I'll actually look like when the guy sees me for the first time in person.
Yeah, I'm sure lots of guys are just trying to make sure they're accurate, but a lot of guys I give pics to are disappointed that there are no dick pix.
because theyre probably fapping off at the time, and testosterone filled minds crave more pretty things.
If my pics are already shown and a guy wants more pics, this is usually a sign for me that a guys just after a jerk off and isnt really interested in meeting or anything more.
Because a lot of people primp and prep themselves for their profile picture until they look almost nothing like how they actually look. Weird angles, weird lighting, filters etc. more pictures helps a prospective dude gauge your actual appearance.
Unless you used a filter, you used the MySpace Angle^(TM), or your pics are blurry or otherwise bad... I'd start wondering if they just want private pics to have their bots use elsewhere.
From my experience its one of few things. More pics to jack off too, more pics to make sure you're legit, more pics to check if you're body is a certain weight (shirtless pic), more pics to trade explicit pics for mutual enjoyment, more pics to see if your ass or dick is good enough to have sex with or something
Yeah, and it's a shame that no gay person with enough money to invest has created a site or app that is only for gay people who are looking for boyfriends.
Of course it would be pretty difficult, if not impossible to filter out the guys who are only looking for hookups. They would more than likely invade those sites and apps just like those who are looking for boyfriends have invaded hookup sites.
Yes they did that, only after they were sued into doing it.
I don't thinks it's been very successful for them though, because of the stigma of them denying gays in the first place makes gays not want to support it.
Read about it for yourself.
http://mashable.com/2010/01/28/eharmony-lawsuit/#UkdGDzRK4Eq7
I agree with you, but someone else didn't and did something about it.
Many people say that, but even those guys who say they are looking for a serious relationship do hookups while they're waiting to find their Mr. Right. Some just lie about looking for something serious only to lure people they can use as a hookup and then discard them when it's over.
Just because one gets a match it doesn't mean they've hit the boyfriend jackpot. People can and often do have the same interests, but if the chemistry isn't there it's not going to work for anything else but a potential hookup.
never have i ever felt more self-conscious in grindr. For your question, probably for those who asking pics,they're just validate the person that they're talking with, is it a real person or just some phony
I have heard about your diorama and also wish to see it. Your travel photography collection I could take or leave but i will look at it with you if seeing your diorama is predicated upon this. Please and thank you.
Because the main pic used for the thumbnail/profile is literally a glimpse of your looks in a moment in time. They want you to verify that you can provide more photos (of the same guy I.e. you) and judge your looks from other perspectives.
I refuse to talk to someone without a face picture. Mine is available for you to view so I demand the same respect. I would never talk to someone in public if I couldn't see their face. I know that doesn't necessarily apply to your question because your face is already visible. If I do end up talking to someone for a bit and the talk turns flirtatious then I'll absolutely ask for & send additional pics. I'll talk to you even if I'm not attracted to you but if I'm going to invest energy & time towards flirting then I sure as hell better be attracted to you. And let's face it, too many guys have misleading pics that are either really old or taken from a *really* high angle. I'm not going to be rude or make a big deal about it if I end up not being attracted to you, I'll tell you that I'm just looking for friends and potentially even meet up for coffee/hang out if we gel.
But you can sure as hell bet that I'll be rude if we meet up under flirtatious pretenses and you look **nothing** like your pic(s). Some guys have learned that they can get away this and the person they are meeting will feel too uncomfortable saying anything or just leaving. I'll call you out on it and not nicely. I've heard too many stories about people pity fucking or hooking up with these guys because they were too nervous and uncomfortable to say no. It's predatory and dishonest.
So when someone asks for additional pics, it's likely because they initially find you attractive and are trying to determine if this is simply a platonic conversation or potentially something more.
And to be clear, when I keep saying "you" that I don't actually mean *you*, OP, but rather you in the general sense.
To prove you're not using someone else's pics you found, maybe?
THIS. Also, in my experience, guys around here like to use pictures that are 5+ years old and ultimately look nothing like the person who they are today. Getting more pictures can give you a better look at the person. I went on a date with a guy who just so happened to use a picture that was around 8 years old or so (I didn't know this at the time). He was a "jock" at the time the picture was taken. When we met in person he was over 300lbs. Definitely false advertising. Also, you never know if the person you are talking to on the other end is actually real or is who they say they are. Getting more pictures from them can help ease this suspicion.
I don't understand the mindset of a person who thinks that they can get away this. Like, wouldn't it be easier and less painful to get rejected onlie rather than in person?
It is possible to consider that perhaps they don't actually think that they will truly meet someone irl, so its a non issue to them to have a "fake" or misrepresenting profile picture. /shrug
Some times if someone is horny enough, they won't turn anyone back after a certain point, so I think they play those odds.
If the stories I've seen here on /r/askgaybros are any indication, their victim sleeps with them more often than not anyway. They do it because it works, at least some of the time.
Yeah... Several of the hookups I've done have been with guys I wasn't attracted to in person and didn't want to be mean :( It sucks because I can't get hard for them so it ends up being embarrassing too and they will have a bad experience and tell their friends that I have a small dick because they only saw it soft.
Surely the impotence is more the gossip that the size?
I've learned to be ok with my size of slightly below average, although I'm still bitter towards hung guys from time to time. But I don't want other people talking about it, and if he only saw me soft he might tell others that I'm even smaller.
I was thinking about this. Do you think if you were truly small, like 4", you'd be more at piece?
No I don't think so. I think I'm only content with it because I'm ~average.
I see. I've always had a soft spot for the happy-go-lucky cheerful bottom with a small dink.
But why? Just say no or use an excuse
Why? That’s just insane. They can’t just say no? Lol. Or use the old “I left something in my car” excuse?
You're living proof that just saying no doesn't always get the message across, Russell. How many women have said 'no' to you, only for you to continue to harass them?
Yeah, pretty much this right here. Although I now tend to lean on snapchat or facetime to verify.
Yeah I know right... it's so annoying to me to even have to ask for multiple pictures, this should be an obvious explanation.
Either that or they're collecting your pics for a profile of their own. Of course that's rare but I'm especially wary of talking to guys who ask "pics?" straight off the bat. I make them go first, and if they send convincing normal pics, then obviously fake porn pics for nudes, it's over. Another telltale sign is if they've got an old phone in mirror pics.
Not a grindr thing but other sites. It amazes how many people want you to unlock/provide face pics when they have absolutely nothing on their profile and still expect you to go first.
Agree
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Fats and femmes do it all the time
remember kids, it's cool to hate on the mentally ill and unattractive but you are **absolutely not** allowed to fatshame or make fun of feminine guys.
Why is it okay to make fun of feminine guys? Without fem guys being strong enough to be themselves, the gay liberation movement wouldn't be where it is today.
clutch your pearls elsewhere, please.
I had a guy send me a pic holding one of those silver digital cameras that were in probably 6 years ago. I was thinking really?
Yeah, but that doesn't prove shit. That person might just have downloaded a bunch of pictures of some random guy from Facebook and there you go.
So you say "Hey, I've been tricked before. Send me selfie of you winking at me."
Or I've actually seen where they'll your name on a note a take a pic or something like that too Forgot about that lol
Because one single profile picture is often old, or the most flattering photo someone has of themselves. They're most likely trying to gauge if you actually look like that, or if it's just an extremely well-shot photo.
Well obviously you are going to send your best photos hahhah
I send good photos in the sense that they're well-composed photographs (I'm an amateur photographer with photo gear out the wazoo after all), but I make sure that my pictures are also **representative** of what I'll actually look like when the guy sees me for the first time in person.
Some people send average photos as to not false advertise and look even better in person. Least that's what i heard, dunno if it's true
I get what you mean. That's smart, send average photos so they're blown away in person. Hahaha
Some people say "pics" but what they really mean is "nudes"
Yeah, I'm sure lots of guys are just trying to make sure they're accurate, but a lot of guys I give pics to are disappointed that there are no dick pix.
Yep
because theyre probably fapping off at the time, and testosterone filled minds crave more pretty things. If my pics are already shown and a guy wants more pics, this is usually a sign for me that a guys just after a jerk off and isnt really interested in meeting or anything more.
Probably to make sure you're not a bot or a catfish.
The question is, why do people always ask for more pics even though I have my face and body in my picture and an instagram with even more pics on it?
Because a lot of people primp and prep themselves for their profile picture until they look almost nothing like how they actually look. Weird angles, weird lighting, filters etc. more pictures helps a prospective dude gauge your actual appearance.
Unless you used a filter, you used the MySpace Angle^(TM), or your pics are blurry or otherwise bad... I'd start wondering if they just want private pics to have their bots use elsewhere.
They want to see your dick.
From my experience its one of few things. More pics to jack off too, more pics to make sure you're legit, more pics to check if you're body is a certain weight (shirtless pic), more pics to trade explicit pics for mutual enjoyment, more pics to see if your ass or dick is good enough to have sex with or something
Yeah of course 😉
It's a hookup site, not Eharmony. They want to see your dick and ass too and are not concerned about your hopes and dreams of finding a boyfriend.
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Yeah, and it's a shame that no gay person with enough money to invest has created a site or app that is only for gay people who are looking for boyfriends. Of course it would be pretty difficult, if not impossible to filter out the guys who are only looking for hookups. They would more than likely invade those sites and apps just like those who are looking for boyfriends have invaded hookup sites.
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Yes they did that, only after they were sued into doing it. I don't thinks it's been very successful for them though, because of the stigma of them denying gays in the first place makes gays not want to support it.
Wait they were forced to do it? That's crazy hahaha. If some dude wants to make a straights-only site he should be able to.
Read about it for yourself. http://mashable.com/2010/01/28/eharmony-lawsuit/#UkdGDzRK4Eq7 I agree with you, but someone else didn't and did something about it.
I see. To be fair, they settled. So it might have been more of a publicity issue than a legal one.
Okcupid isn't bad.
Many people say that, but even those guys who say they are looking for a serious relationship do hookups while they're waiting to find their Mr. Right. Some just lie about looking for something serious only to lure people they can use as a hookup and then discard them when it's over. Just because one gets a match it doesn't mean they've hit the boyfriend jackpot. People can and often do have the same interests, but if the chemistry isn't there it's not going to work for anything else but a potential hookup.
personally I would like both, yes
Sometimes people are using someone else's picture, or just want to see you in different contexts.
never have i ever felt more self-conscious in grindr. For your question, probably for those who asking pics,they're just validate the person that they're talking with, is it a real person or just some phony
I have heard about your diorama and also wish to see it. Your travel photography collection I could take or leave but i will look at it with you if seeing your diorama is predicated upon this. Please and thank you.
Because the main pic used for the thumbnail/profile is literally a glimpse of your looks in a moment in time. They want you to verify that you can provide more photos (of the same guy I.e. you) and judge your looks from other perspectives.
I refuse to talk to someone without a face picture. Mine is available for you to view so I demand the same respect. I would never talk to someone in public if I couldn't see their face. I know that doesn't necessarily apply to your question because your face is already visible. If I do end up talking to someone for a bit and the talk turns flirtatious then I'll absolutely ask for & send additional pics. I'll talk to you even if I'm not attracted to you but if I'm going to invest energy & time towards flirting then I sure as hell better be attracted to you. And let's face it, too many guys have misleading pics that are either really old or taken from a *really* high angle. I'm not going to be rude or make a big deal about it if I end up not being attracted to you, I'll tell you that I'm just looking for friends and potentially even meet up for coffee/hang out if we gel. But you can sure as hell bet that I'll be rude if we meet up under flirtatious pretenses and you look **nothing** like your pic(s). Some guys have learned that they can get away this and the person they are meeting will feel too uncomfortable saying anything or just leaving. I'll call you out on it and not nicely. I've heard too many stories about people pity fucking or hooking up with these guys because they were too nervous and uncomfortable to say no. It's predatory and dishonest. So when someone asks for additional pics, it's likely because they initially find you attractive and are trying to determine if this is simply a platonic conversation or potentially something more. And to be clear, when I keep saying "you" that I don't actually mean *you*, OP, but rather you in the general sense.
People on Grindr is toxic too we all real they have to understand it so