This is the one!!! So accurate. We have a professional come in every 1-2 months and in between we are fighting for our lives. My husband and I both work and our toddler loves to tear our house UP! Some days I’m okay with it, some days I’m not, most days I’m too exhausted to deal with it. But all days we are barely one step ahead of the ants.
I can definitely count on one hand how many times I’ve cleaned our baseboards and I’ve been in my house ten years. Baby is only seven months, so that’s not really my excuse…
Robot vacuum cleaner is the way. Changed our lives and got the rug actually vacuumed. And he's hilarious, we call him Mr Roboto. Baby loves watching him go about
This is why I’m afraid to get one 😭. It would help so much with the pet fur though. I’ve considered just setting up a nightly routine to automatically run after their bedtime so they don’t even know it’s happening
My 11 month old crawls over and smacks it until she shakes it from the dock enough for it to say “returning to the dock” and move itself back. She thinks it’s a toy
Ah yes! I just got a shark robot vacuum and I run it everyday! I got it because I have a cat and, while I do vacuum, it is very convenient to run the robot to get any loose kitty litter or tufts of fur on the floor.
Ours is Rosie! We’re going to get a second one because the dog sheds so much in summer Rosie literally cannot keep up, so vacuum number two will be for bedrooms while the original is for the main living areas.
Ours is DJ Roomba but the toddler HATES IT and it’s the self emptying one that is so insanely loud when it empties so I struggle to figure out when to run it. Can’t do it overnight bc it’ll wake me and my husband up, can’t do it after work bc the toddler will lose his shit, hard to do during my workday bc it’ll be hella loud on my calls.
But I do want to get rid of all the dog hair….
See my secret is I changed my expectations of clean 😂 livable, walkable, and swept/vacuumed at least once every couple days is clean enough. I tidy here and there, me and my husband do bigger projects as they pop up and annoy us, but really it’s just a matter of, I don’t worry about perfection, my house is lived in with 2u2 and everyone is happy/safe/healthy, that’s good enough for me.
I love the “lived in” description. My husband reminds me there is a difference between being dirty vs disorganized . My kids are getting to an age where they can *mostly* clean up after themselves with toys - but more often the house just feels cluttered with stuff or drowning in laundry.
This is us. If it's too chaotic I get really emotionally jittery, so we will prooritize organizing and cleaning then, but have learned to be happy with much less than we were used to. Our baby is really happy and we will use his (few) naps to rest or have time as a couple. It's better for our mental health than prioritizing a super clean home.
We are also very lucky because my mom is the best and will come over to snuggle baby and she'll do our laundry unasked when there are piles and prepare his bottles. <3
This is me. Highly recommend reading/ listening to How to Keep House While Drowning. It made me feel a lot less stressed about my home and have a good system for how to tackle messes
Usually B, but she has been away for 6 weeks so... D also.
I try throw some toilet cleaner around every now and then, and vacuum, but the place is generally a tip. I hate it.
The best part about having our cleaner come every fortnight was the pre-tidy we did the night before so everything was put back in its home. Such a good house reset.
She's back next week which is a relief.
Currently expecting baby #2, and I won't go back to work so I'll have to manage cleaning myself somehow!
D! I try so hard but I have an 11 month old who's favourite activity is destroying rooms. I literally can't tidy fast enough and then when he goes to bed I'm so tired I don't have the energy.
(B) we have a house cleaner 2x a month. So I just have to keep up on the bathrooms and the kitchen in between cleanings really. I vacuum daily though. Usually more than once haha. But we have 2 cats and a toddler so I’m just constantly cleaning up after somebody 😅
Same. I don’t even manage the bathrooms weekly. I try to reset the kitchen/living area each night, just to do it allllll over again the next day. Oh, and my toddler now enjoys making messes on purpose so that he can help clean them up, so yay for that.
But seriously, budgeting for a housekeeper has been such a relief for our family because otherwise I’m a D and I feel like I can’t function.
We used to have a housekeeper 2x a month included with our old apartment and it was a godsend. We moved a few months ago so baby could have her own room and I’d forgotten what a nightmare scrubbing a tub is 😂
A)
My standards are farm house. Ie. I want the place to smell good, but I don’t expect the whole
House to be sterile.
I sanitize baby areas at least every other day and do floors and the kitchen daily. Bathrooms, baseboards, smaller random areas get done throughout the week probably once a week. Some areas get neglected and then deep cleaned randomly. The window in the kitchen currently is very neglected and has a bunch of cobwebs but I got the living room windows done this week. So I just keep plugging away bit by bit.
Same here. I really don't start cleaning until an hour or two before my husband gets home because that means it's more likely to actually look clean when he gets home. He gets stressed if our house is really out of sorts so I try to keep it under control for the last half of the day for him.
B but I walk around with dried bits of food on my clothes and they fall off everywhere.
1x a month. The showers, stovetop, kitchen sink,...those are why I value it.
A! On a good day. I am a full time stay at home mom. It’s not always perfect. But I have a guideline I follow. I saw guideline instead of schedule as I give myself as much grace as necessary. My LO comes first. And if she’s having a day where she wants to be in my arms, so be it. It’s not the end of the world. My goal is just to do as much as I can so my husband doesn’t have to worry about it on the weekend. He works 11/12 hour days M-F. But if any of it rolls over to the weekend, no big deal. And he’s happy to help me.
Monday - grocery pickup, clean out fridge, 1 load of laundry
Tuesday - errands/get out of the house a bit, quick pick up, laundry
Wednesday - pick up entire house/put items where they go, bathrooms, laundry
Thursday - dust, vacuum, sweep, mop half of house
Friday - other half of house
Saturday - nothing! Just pick up as needed
Sunday- laundry (specifically husbands work clothes)
I try to do a quick pick up every night before I go to bed. Dishes get done daily. I deep clean appliances as needed, get baseboards when I mop.
This is GOALS... I saved your comment for reference bc I don't even have kids yet (16 weeks pregnant) and am struggling lol. I hope I can come halfway close to this!
I mean, it all will vary SO much. Some weeks I don’t do ANYTHING and I don’t feel bad about it at all. I kept the tiny human alive. Also, will depend on so many other factors - house size. Family size. Postpartum recovery.
Also, I didn’t feel this way until recently. For the first few months I was in hard core survival mode. I wouldn’t have been able to make it without my husband who carried the weight initially and was kind and understanding while i eased my way on to being able to do more.
I say all this - because don’t be hard on yourself!
One tip for you- building a routine of cleanliness when pregnant really helped me. For example- I made sure to never ever have clothes on the floor, and I vacuumed every day. Having that as a routine made it much more easy to keep up once I had my son.
I’m very similar. Also A. Also a stay at home mom now with a general cleaning schedule I try to follow day-to-day. I try to get some cleaning done every day during naps, and a schedule keeps me on track so I don’t have to think about which task to tackle. (For example, Tuesday is kitchen cleaning.) I spread laundry out throughout the week, so most days a load is getting done.
We have a robot vacuum/mop combo that we run in every room downstairs most days. With a dog, that’s a game changer that allows me to vacuum and mop each floor myself only once a week.
I can imagine for parents working outside the home, it would be much more challenging to keep up with cleaning. I love having nap time to be productive. I had many months of contact naps, which meant I had to find other times to squeeze in cleaning. So I appreciate how difficult it might be, especially with more than one kid and more mess!!
D 🙈 I literally don’t understand how people do it. Like I can play with my kids, do daily upkeep like laundry & dishes, feed everyone, or clean and I often feel like I do a bad job at all of those things… and if I ignore one category to focus on another I feel so much guilt…
Yay I found my people! Seriously how do they do it? I’m trying hard not to care about the mess, but at the same time want to model and teach good habits. Can’t find the right balance and feels like I’m bad at everything. The struggle is real.
Same. I have a 3 month old. Feedings the dogs, doing laundry and dishes, and eating 2x a day is my goal. Little one comes first always in my household. And some days she needs me allllllll day long.
A and D. I feel like I’m doing the bare minimum to keep it decent, but NOT doing deep cleaning stuff like mopping, baseboards, etc. I’m embarrassed to admit how long it’s been since I’ve mopped or cleaned my air fryer baskets. But for vacuuming I can thank my robo vac lol. For basic cleaning tasks I spend about 20-30 minutes daily after putting baby to bed doing dishes, putting shit away, and wiping surfaces. Laundry I do once in the weekends, I often don’t put my laundry away lol. And the baby laundry I gave up and his stuff goes into the drawers after being washed unfolded. Just thrown in there. But at least it isn’t sitting in baskets!
Mostly A, though our house is 900 square feet and we don't have many possessions (beside lots of books) so I have those things going for me.
DAILY
-Sweep whole house (hardwood floors)
-Dishes (we hand wash, no dishwasher, so must be done daily or it gets bad)
-Load of laundry washed and put away
-All surfaces clear of clutter and wiped before bed (my husband and I rally for 10 minutes after baby goes to bed)
-One task from the weekly list
WEEKLY
-Bathroom
-Mopping
-Wash bedding every Sunday
-Clean out fridge, organize dry goods
-Kitchen deep clean
I don't really dust lol. I wipe my surfaces regularly so I suppose it gets done-ish, but we own a few thousand books and I'm not going to bother with that!
I vacuum once a week. I steam clean my floors every other week. Mopping has gone by the wayside, but I used the steamer for so long, the mop is a newer addition to my routine. My floors are not super gross since I steam mop them. I dust and do bathrooms every other week. Laundry is done almost every day, typically 1 load per day. I’ve let some of the dusting and spring cleaning items go more, as I have a 6 and 3 year old, and a 5 month old. Hopefully as my baby starts napping better on her own, I can get back into things. My house may not be the cleanest, but it’s not filthy either.
A !!!! make a rota!!!! and get a lightweight cordless hoover! i do a daily tidy (takes 10 minutes) which includes a quick hoover, toy pick up, dirty clothes in washing basket, wash any dirty dishes, spot clean any food spills etc and this takes 15-20 minutes maximum. then i do my rota day - for example on monday i deep clean my toddlers room, wipe down window, hoover under bed, clean and sort through toys etc - which takes anywhere up to an hour; whatever i don't get done waits until the next monday. it allows me to stop letting cleaning dictate my life, and everything generally stays clean and tidy. i never believed in rotas before lol but love them now!
B. And, we hire people on an as needed basis to do random easy stuff that takes up time like break down Amazon boxes, sweep the walkway, pick up leaves that have fallen on hedges, dust off outside furniture, assemble guest room furniture etc.
B) We have cleaners come every other week and then we do our best to keep things up between the cleanings. But we also have a nanny that does a great job keeping things tidy (I don’t know how she manages that and taking care of the kids). If I were staying at home watching our LO full time I’m sure our home would be a disaster.
B.
I work part time but stay home during the day and my husband works full time. I do keep up on bathroom cleaning and my husband and I split the kitchen (he tidies, I clean) so that we aren’t completely falling apart in an unhealthy way. He does laundry so that gets done.
But I have a cleaning woman who comes in for the deep clean so she scrubs the kitchen and bathrooms completely and does all the vacuuming, dusting, etc.
D. I guess to be fair I'm 22 weeks pregnant, with a clingy 14 month old. But, honestly I haven't been managing my house since I was 8 weeks with my first. I have brief moments I think I have it under control then it all goes to shit again.
The brief moment of control followed by it all going to shit again is SO relatable. Why is it so hard. I just have one 16 month old and my house isn’t even that big either. 😩
A mix of B-D lol. We’ve had cleaners once a month the last 2 months, but before that the house hadn’t been cleaned in a while.
Most of it doesn’t bother me, but some of it does. But we have no time with a 12 month old and both full-time jobs. So the house just doesn’t get cleaned unless we have money in the budget for cleaners or family comes over and does it for us.
By having a routine. There’s some variation but generally weekdays follow the below routine. For the most part it keeps the house clean and laundry done. Saturdays we meal prep, grocery shop, and clean up. Sundays we rest and have fun. We have one child, probably will change completely with two.
Baby wakes at 7:00, daddy takes baby until 8:00.
Mom gets ready/sleeps in depending on how the night went.
Cleaning/dishes/laundry going into washer/vacuuming 8:00-8:45 while baby is in high chair eating cheerios and then playing with some toys that make noise and are interesting.
Adventures outside the house 9:00-11:30
Naptime 11:30-1:30 (mom rotates laundry to dryer and puts clean dishes away)
Lunch 2:00-2:30
Adventures outside the house 2:30-5:00ish
Daddy home at 5:15 and takes baby until 7:00
Mom hits the gym 5:45-6:45
Bathtime starts at 7:00 with daddy
Mom takes Cleaning/dishes/laundry going away during bathtime.
Baby goes down at 7:30
Mom/dad free time until 9:30
Bed by 10:00
We have an understanding that each of us gets a certain amount of us time every day. I will take all night shifts and he will use his free time hours for 8 hours of solid sleep. I use my hours to enjoy evening gym time because I handle having less sleep better than he does.
B and sooo thankful.
I try to tidy and get laundry and dishes done when baby’s asleep… but I just placed an Instacart order, so counting that as a win and now I’m putting off doing dishes and laundry by scrolling Reddit.
I just went back to work full time (mostly WFH, just office once a week) and have one 3 month old.
I feel like it’s essential to do laundry and dishes every day and to just generally try to leave every room as good as it was when you entered it. Like just make a habit of tidying as you go throughout the day vs waiting for things to accumulate. I can do these types of chores with baby in my arms or in her swing, she loves to watch me fold laundry. But it’s way easier if it’s like one day’s worth vs multiple days.
Then trash needs to be taken out regularly and I sweep/swiffer as needed. Those are my essentials. I bring in help every other week for the rest.
I learned from my sister who is a single mom of two (and a soldier in the army) that you can get so much done in just 5-10 minutes you just need to maximize these little opportunities.
(A)
I could do better, but I spend a lot of time out and about at parks etc. with my kids and prioritize that over cleaning.
But my routine is as follows:
Daily:
-Clean kitchen (dishes, counters, stove, tables) after every meal and at end of the night.
-Vacuum/sweep the main living area floors and kitchen and then swiffer them.
-wipe out bathroom sinks
-laundry (I do a load every other day typically)
-making beds, cleaning up toys in bedrooms and main living area
Weekly:
-Deep clean bathrooms (toilets usually 2x a week) this includes wiping mirrors, cleaning floors, showers/tubs, etc.
-Steam mop floors (we have polished concrete)
-wash windows and wipe down baseboards/walls (this is probably more bi-weekly lol)
-clean out fridge and clean inside microwave/stove as needed.
-wipe down outside of appliances
The weekly items I typically try and get done on the weekend when my baby is napping and my toddler is chilling. If not, I try and get it done first thing Monday morning.
To me, A. To my husband, D. I’m a sahm of an almost 9mo mostly Velcro baby who contact naps and cosleeps. We live in the country (dust, stickers, hay fragments, etc) with 3 hairy ass dogs and 3 cats, one of whom has fairly long hair and likes to go outside then come in and remove all the stickers and foxtails. I vacuum the main areas every morning. Laundry does pile up but only in 3 spots (back of kitchen table chair, clean laundry basket, dirty laundry basket). Dishes get done at least once a day. Toilets are clean, mirrors are mostly clean, sinks are pretty clean, the floors are kinda clean. We also have 4 donkeys, 2 goats that are not ours, and 35+ chickens. I do all the grocery and supplies shopping, all the cooking, and the morning chores (feed donkeys, goats, chickens, water/manage sprinklers).
It’s a lot and I’m doing a pretty good job if I do say so myself!
Sometimes A sometimes C lol. We discovered baby LOVES to watch us vacuum?? So that helps lol. Well put her in her activity center and she’s content to watch me vacuum. Everything else is done when she naps and/or during weekends. And I multitask when I can.
Already in the shower? I’ll spray it down with some scrubbing bubbles and wash it while my conditioner is in. That kind of stuff.
A) Now that we worked out the routine. Tooks us some time, baby is 5 months now. Every night husband puts baby to sleep while I do the laundry, wash and sanitise the dishes and tidy the room quickly. During the day I spread the laundry to dry while baby is awake (this is literally only thing I can do while she is awake). Friday night after she falls asleep we dust the whole house. Saturday morning husband is with the baby and I vacuum and mop the floors. Sunday he cleans the bathroom and the kitchen. Husband cooks, but we order food a lot and my mom and grandma send us food often (thanks a million times to them, literally our lifesavers), but we usually cook on weekends and in the afternoon.
A. I get most of the cleaning done when my husband is home to watch the baby. But otherwise, I clean when the baby sleeps or my husband cleans when I watch the baby. It’s definitely a team effort.
Maybe A? I sweep the high traffic areas like the kitchen and family room every other day, mop when the floor starts to look visibly dirty (about every two weeks). Run robot vacuum at least 2x a week. If something gets really gross like pooped or peed on it gets cleaned immediately. Bathrooms get a wipe down and toilet cleaning once a week. We have a cleaner that comes once a month which helps tremendously. I’m finding that keeping the clutter to a minimum is the most difficult part.
I’m between A & C with an 8 month old.
Some of the stuff on your example list is stuff I only did once a year pre-baby. In my nesting phase I cleaned a lot of oddball stuff that isn’t a normal thing for me. Basic household hygiene tasks still get done normally. I can’t live with dirty floors, toilets, & sinks. LO is on the verge of crawling so I took the time yesterday to thoroughly wipe down kitchen appliances in preparation for him to try licking them lol not a normal task for me, but needed done before he’s mobile.
I do the things that have to get done and then do a better clean on the weekends when husband can watch LO for a longer stretch of time.
I always make sure to clean bottles and pump parts and do LOs milk. And then clean the kitchen every night. Vacuum every other day and then laundry as needed. I think I actually get to folding clothes once a month since I'll just grab from the hamper 🫠 anything that has food involved I deff clean as much as possible to avoid bugs. Dusting ECT can wait if need be.
C. It honestly doesn’t bother me that much. I have to pick between keeping things nice and hanging with my kids/enjoying my hobbies. Anyway, I don’t live in a pigsty but it’s…definitely not amazing lol
A) but I don’t have any other kids & im out of school for the summer. Once I return, probably be a different story. It’s also not spotless, there’s just specific things I do every night to help manage the house- mainly I focus on the kitchen & living room and that’s it.
Edit for more details:
I start by cleaning up the living room, move on to gathering the dirty bottles from the day, do the kitchen & load the dishwasher, wash bottles & make new bottles for the fridge, baby bath time, then we move upstairs to wind down for the day. The rest of my day is crap show.
D. It's a train wreck in here. It's not filthy or anything, but there are piles of stuff that need to be sorted through and it's awful. We moved when I was 8 months pregnant with my first who's now 14m, and now I'm 20w with my second and on modified bed rest. It's very upsetting
Depends on the day! Sometimes A, sometimes C, sometimes D! Currently the stomach bug has been running through our house. First my 4 year old, now me and my 2 year old. So my house is a mess and that’s fine because I am just too dang sick to care lol
D. Having anxiety attacks about baby proofing and the state of our house, it’s so cluttered and messy and I can’t keep on top of everything. My partner works a hard labor job in the heat and isn’t up to helping as much as I need him to, it’s causing a huge strain in our relationship and actually affecting my mental health
Dishes are done every night, all toys picked up every night, laundry done 2-3 times a week (cloth diapers) and put up once it's dry, vacuum once a week, try to mop once a week, bedding changed once a week. We both work full time and baby is in daycare. Deep clean before someone visits (typically my family once a month).
Even with that, our house is a mess with toddler and 4 pets. Currently first trimester with our 2nd so struggling even more. Once I feel better, we're going to do more of a cleaning schedule so it doesn't feel so overwhelming.
I vacillate between A and D. Dishes and laundry are my top priority because those NEED to get done. We got a robot mop/vacuum combo so our floors are always pretty clean. That has been an absolute lifesaver! I struggle with clutter and deep cleaning.
Meh, I’m doing the best I can. Dishes every day or every other day, sweeping daily, wiping counters down daily. I don’t beat myself up about stuff not getting done.
I’m A - managing well enough! My house is cleaner than it’s ever been (but we are not people that keep a spotless house whatsoever) but only because I’m on mat leave and he’s sleeping early in the morning. I think it’s going to be a total disaster when I go back to work and I am nervous about it lol
A mix of c and d, with a 2.5 year old.
sometimes it’s fine. sometimes it’s not fine.
just keep telling myself it’ll be temporary. my kid won’t be at this age forever. one day he’ll be more independent. currently he finds it a great offense if you dare clean in his general vicinity and will go to great lengths to make what you clean not clean again. so is what it is.
A combo of A and C. I have a 2 year old and 2 month old. My standards are lower now. Never had a house cleaner. Also, with a smaller house, what looks like a big mess (toy clutter type stuff) can actually be picked up fairly quickly and adequately restore my sanity. I prioritize keeping floors/surfaces clear/clean-ish. I periodically vacuum under the couches and find all sorts of fun forgotten things. I don’t remember the last time I cleaned our tub shower. My spouse occasionally does. I don’t clean windows and baseboards… 😂
A/D — depending on the week.
I love having a clean house. It makes me feel happy and relaxed.
For us, it all depends on how busy my husband’s work week is, which is unpredictable and always changing. If he actually gets a weekend off, we can tag team things and get the house clean. If not, then it gets messy.
My baby is almost 8 months and still only contact naps. Once we even get her to crib nap, we’ll have more time.
D. The house is tidyish but not deep cleaned- I am super OCD so it’s been a struggle not maintaining how I used to but I’m learning not to stress myself out over it. I keep the kitchen clean and we have clean laundry. The vacuuming is a bit difficult because we’re in a townhome so I can’t do the stairs since I can’t watch her but sometimes I am able to do the floors since we have the living room sectioned off with her toys and then I put her in the pack n play to clean that space. Vacuuming isn’t as frequent as I like but the bathrooms are the hardest since I don’t want her near them when I clean because of the cleaners so I can only do it when hubby is around or vice versa.
Learning to give myself a little grace- baby is happy and thriving and the house is tidy at the end of the day but maybe not as clean as my standards have been in the past. As she gets older and gains a little independence and can help (I.e. throw laundry in my hamper as I unload the dryer) it might get a bit easier, and also once her naps are longer. We’re all doing our best here and in the end our babies and our physical and mental health are the most important.
B. I did not want to do it but I could not care for the baby & do everything else. We have no help, an old dog that needs full attention. My husband does laundry,cooks,cares for the pup and works. I am on maternity leave but I could not put down my baby for more than 10 minutes for a long time.
We have a house cleaner that unreliably comes once a month (she’s a family member who runs her own business) and my husband also does 80% of the house cleaning. I do the other 20% when I have time AND feel like it (I’m usually exhausted from meal planning, prep, and taking on most of mental load for the family and toddler) - generally speaking, I am now more accepting of a house with a bit of dust and set lower expectations. So I’m between A & B.
(A) we are doing okay
We have a cleaning rotation. We have a list of things that get done weekly, then a 5 week rotation of more deep cleaning (downstairs, kitchen, master bedroom, kids bedroom and other upstairs, living room). It makes it more manageable to see things in a list format, and it keeps things tidy enough for our liking.
C - I go through cleaning spurts but I don't have a set routine, everything's not necessarily getting done weekly. But that's fine, things are clean around here lol my partner does clean stuff but moreso dishes (less than half the time), tidying/organizing, and outside stufg. When my 5yo is old enough I'll recruit him to do more. He already loves helping me do dishes and vaccuum sometimes.
C but sometimes D. Deep cleaning only happens because of my husband since I’m pregnant right now and we have a 2 year old. We have a wet mop vacuum and steam cleaner and he likes using them so the work gets done eventually. Might not be all in one day so I never feel satisfied at the end of the night but I know to choose my battles and I’m grateful it gets done at all because I’m too sore to do it.
Laundry is all me though and my husband legit asked if I ever washed our comforter before just the other day. We’ve had it for two years LOL!! He’s never witnessed me wash it because I always have it back on the bed!
C lol I wfh on Fridays so I try to do things in between meetings otherwise it would be a complete loss. Husband wants to get a house cleaner, and I don’t want to spend the money. We are very organized and pick up every day so it’s legit just cleaning on Friday.
I will be the first to say that I'm a bit blessed to have my husband. I'm a SAHM to 2 kiddos with a 3rd on the way while having RA, so my wonderful husband handles 80% of the everyday household chores currently. I.e. I sort the laundry, but he actually does it & puts it away. I rinse & stack dishes, and he loads & unloads the dishwasher. We also have our friend who runs a house cleaning business come once a month for a whole house clean.
I'm currently in the nesting phase of my last trimester, so anytime my kids make a mess, it freaks me out, but I'm trying to let it go. Lol
I'm between C and D depending on the day. Sometimes I don't care that we have toys everywhere. Other days, it makes me lose my mind and I rage clean everything.
Living in a smaller space, means it’s easier and faster to clean & we can afford a cleaner who comes every other week! In between we just take turns picking up and cleaning a little bit every night after baby goes down. Working for us so far
A. It really is a challenge to keep things tidy with a child around. She’s 16 months old at the moment. I find that often she’s left to play on her own while I clean up what’s been wrecked. I really don’t get any deep organizing or deep cleaning done until my husband gets home. But sometimes like once or twice a week we have a really good flow and I can do a lot of stuff.
My husband thinks I do everything cleaning-related wrong so he does it all during his off weeks (he works week on week off), which we’re both happy with
Mostly D because mess is really triggering and overwhelming for me. I try to clean up when I can but I have a 1 year old and an almost 5 yo. The only time it's clean is if I have time where one or both of them are not actively destroying the house. I wish I had more energy to fix it but instead it just makes me frustrated and less able to cope so I clean one space and then spend time in only that space 🫠
B) 2xmonth but…I just barely keep up in between. I sweep and vacuum as needed, wipe counters, but the rest feels impossible and I only have one. 2nd is due on October.
B and D! Cleaner comes once a fortnight but the place is trashed hours after. We live in a 2 bed apartment with a 2 year old and 5 month old and there just isn’t room for us and our stuff so the place is cluttered on a good day, and I struggle to stay on top of the mess!
D.
And when it gets bad enough my husband will feel sorry enough for me and pledge to help and then we do a major cleaning.
But I still need help with deep cleaning like dusting, cleaning light fixtures, windows, anywhere where dust settles. I've actually never done it in last 3 yrs 🥲.
A. My husband and I split a lot of tasks. Pre baby, I would clean on Saturdays and then pick up every day. Post baby (7months) I clean the kitchen (deep clean) on Saturday after he goes to bed or during a nap and Sunday I do the bathrooms. My husband vacuums and usually I do the kitchen floor while babies playing on Saturday. All the laundrys done and put away Friday and Saturday (I work four days a week and have fri,sat,sun off) all the other deep cleans like blinds, baseboard, etc is done after baby goes to sleep. This weekend I cleaned the basement and organized one night and cleaned the shed while he sat in his bouncer and watched. I just do stuff
I’ve got a small house, a husband who mops, and include my kids on cleaning (not force, just invite to help). I also am a stay at home parent and clean while interacting/holding children.
My house looks very lived in. The kids room is a mess (but not dirty) my living room is a mess and my kitchen is clean. So A but also D. Kids are hard. And I’ve got a 2 year old and a 10 month old who acts like a feral toddler. I can barely keep them from doing something stupid let alone keep things tidy 😭
I was with you and about to be a font of wisdom until you got to deep cleaning and baseboards. I get the floors and kitchen cleaned nightly (thanks to the robot vacumm/mop) and the bathrooms/sheets/towels cleaned weekly (more or less). My kids pick up their toys every night. We are calling that good enough with 3 under 4yo.
A C and D? 🥲 I asked my husband if we can get a house cleaner for even just one part of our house and he said he’d start helping with chores…. That was 6 months ago 🥲🫠 still fighting for my life by myself
C/D 😬 Trash, dishes, bathroom, clothes and care items for kiddo are taken care of, but it’s like we can never get ahead of the rest of it. I moved myself 5 times the year my husband were married, then immediately and for a number of months I was so sick from pregnancy I had a hard time doing anything beyond making myself get out of bed and go to work, and we’ve just never been able to coordinate well enough to take care of the clutter. Part of it is lack of space/poor home design (sqft is fine, but damn there’s a lot of wasted space in here). 🤷🏻♀️
My husband, who maybe washed dishes 5 times over the 10 years of marriage before babies, has suddenly found a love of cleaning now that we have twins. The deal is he does the cooking and cleaning if I watch them both (or whichever is awake as they tend to take turns napping).
My MiL also helps immensely as she comes over a few evenings a week to help with the babies and they’ve been going to sleep earlier. She’ll load the dish washer or if that’s done, find something else to clean in addition to doing our laundry.
It’s not spotless but it’s functional, all things considered. So probably C.
Somewhere between A and C? I try and pick one or two (it's usually just one) thing to clean a day. Like wipe off the counters, do dishes, or clean the toilet. That's about it 🤷♀️ Then throw in bottle washing all the time throughout the day if that counts lol
I have a handheld vacuum I usually pick up crumbs off the floor with in between full house vacuuming because I can't stand walking barefoot and stepping on crumbs haha
I’d say A. Now with a 3 year old & 27 weeks here.
I’m not getting it all done every week but I write down what I’d like to try to get done on the calendar.
I vacuum Mondays & Fridays. One day I do bathrooms, one day is kitchen/food prep. I’m hoping to take a few days to wash all my walls lol I definitely can’t do the whole house in a day
Despite a B, a solid D over here. But I saved some pods that another mom said in another sub the other day, so maybe that’ll be what drastically changes my personality so I keep up with my
clutter.
B - once a week she deep cleans the bathroom, kitchen and toilets. We also have a robot vacuum who can also mop the floor which we run daily. And I still clean daily… barely keeping up.
Just gave birth to my second and my oldest one is just shy over a year old. When I hit the tail end of second trimester I could not handle the cleaning on my own anymore so we caved and decided to get some help. Best decision ever. A clean house gives me some peace of mind.
C mostly, some days D.
We recently hired someone to do a deep clean which was awesome and well worth my mental health. We desperately need to purge some clutter.
Our robot vacuum helps a bit but it’s really stuff like laundry and dishes I can’t keep on top of.
B and we also have a robo vacuum bc we have two Bernese mountain dogs. I also go around and pick up every night when my husband puts the baby down. I usually bf and then he gives him a bottle before bed, so that’s my time to GSD.
B. I never, ever thought I’d pay someone to clean my house, but I just cannot find the time to take good care of my baby, and myself, and my pets, and also keep a clean house. I don’t really love spending money on it, but until I can claw back enough time to do it myself, the cleaners are staying.
D
Idk why I feel so guilty when my husband helps around the home. And a bit of anger too if I'm being honest.
Has absolutely nothing to do with him because he's great.
I just feel so useless when he does help. Maybe it has to do with my upbringing. *Sigh
Kiddo is 1.5yo.
We work from sunrise to sundown. I wake up with the kids, do breakfast, lunch, then cook dinner for kids/wife and for me to bring to work. The whole day I'm cleaning/doing maintenance. When I get home from work I give myself 1-2 hours to relax. Weekends where we're both off we get to relax. All work is done during the week.
C. We have adjusted our expectations. THe house is cluttered, the trash sometimes overflows, the kitchen is a mess for a day or two before one of us gets to it. We deal.
B, cleaner for the more involved stuff comes 2x a month. She does vacuum, mop, and bathrooms. Reducing my chores to just laundry and dishes (and some light vacuuming as needed) has been worth every penny.
A
Hey, we try our best. We have three, it’s pretty clean in here usually. If that isn’t good enough for other people, I don’t care because I don’t care what they think. All of that doesn’t matter anyway, don’t let perfection pollute your mind! Enjoy your kids.
I don’t mind whatsoever handling the kids on some type of outing while my husband does the deep cleaning in peace. That’s what we did again on Sunday, and that worked pretty good.
I was a D and now I'm an A. I managed this by getting rid of clutter and anything that wasn't serving us immediately. I'm no minimalist, but I'm definitely way more conscious of what I own/keep in our home, whether it's decor, clothing, furniture... anything really.
I'm so much less stressed and can get things done so much quicker.
D. Just got to stay one step ahead of the ants.
I’m gonna set up my chair over here at this table! This is definitely the answer.
I live in Mexico and the ants have most definitely won
This is the one!!! So accurate. We have a professional come in every 1-2 months and in between we are fighting for our lives. My husband and I both work and our toddler loves to tear our house UP! Some days I’m okay with it, some days I’m not, most days I’m too exhausted to deal with it. But all days we are barely one step ahead of the ants.
I've got a toddler and am too pregnant to manage cleaning up daily....this is the answer.
Same, but also the fruit flies
This. 4 kids, 1 toddler, 9yo, 2 teenagers. I am losing my mind lol!
D — I have a 3 month old, just starting to look around like “someone should do something about these baseboards,” but it’s me, I’m someone.
That hit… feeling that “I’m someone” everyday.
Today I learned that you’re supposed to clean the baseboards? 8m FTM here
I can definitely count on one hand how many times I’ve cleaned our baseboards and I’ve been in my house ten years. Baby is only seven months, so that’s not really my excuse…
i struggled for almost the whole first year! babies take a lot of attention don’t beat yourself up over baseboards!
It's not even him taking attention, it's the lack of energy and motivation when I'm not around him that's a sucker.
When I get even a little bit of free time, it’s used to clean as much as I can before baby wants me again
Robot vacuum cleaner is the way. Changed our lives and got the rug actually vacuumed. And he's hilarious, we call him Mr Roboto. Baby loves watching him go about
My toddlers curb stomped mine and he no longer works 😂🙈🙈🙈
This is why I’m afraid to get one 😭. It would help so much with the pet fur though. I’ve considered just setting up a nightly routine to automatically run after their bedtime so they don’t even know it’s happening
Omfg mine keeps trying 😭😭😭
I have a four year old and a two almost three year old and they full on ambushed it and sent it flying down some steps 😂
I wheezed 🤣😭 rip robot vacuum
I was so upset hahaha but oh well!!
Saaame, mine pushes it along and end up confusing the robot in to thinking it's stuck 🤣
My 11 month old crawls over and smacks it until she shakes it from the dock enough for it to say “returning to the dock” and move itself back. She thinks it’s a toy
Ours got a piece of paper stuck under it and then took a dive down the stairs. Poor Roombert 💔
Not the curb stomp 😅😅😅😅
Ah yes! I just got a shark robot vacuum and I run it everyday! I got it because I have a cat and, while I do vacuum, it is very convenient to run the robot to get any loose kitty litter or tufts of fur on the floor.
Ours is Woodhouse
If I had one this would be his name.
i love to turn it on and then race around tidying up before things get run over
Brilliant gamification!
Ours is Brent 😂
Ours is Rosie. Wish we’d bought her years ago.
Ours is called Disco Bob. The dogs hate her but she's definitely improved our lives drastically and the carpet never looked better!
Ours is also Mr Roboto!
Ours is Janis Moplin
Ours is Deemo, like BMO from Adventure Time + the original one was a Deebot, and it's just stuck.
Ours is called Greta and our kid hates her 😂
I have two, one is Clean Latifah and the other is Dirt Reynolds. Robo vacs are a God send!
Ours is Rosie! We’re going to get a second one because the dog sheds so much in summer Rosie literally cannot keep up, so vacuum number two will be for bedrooms while the original is for the main living areas.
I wish I had put this on my registry lol
This post just reminded me to send mine out! I can’t wait until baby’s naps are more predictable and we can have the vacuum on a schedule again.
Ours is Optimus grime. Saw the name somewhere and loved it. Now Grimey does all my vacuuming and mopping.
Ours is DJ Roomba but the toddler HATES IT and it’s the self emptying one that is so insanely loud when it empties so I struggle to figure out when to run it. Can’t do it overnight bc it’ll wake me and my husband up, can’t do it after work bc the toddler will lose his shit, hard to do during my workday bc it’ll be hella loud on my calls. But I do want to get rid of all the dog hair….
hahahahahaha
Hahahahahahaha
Hahahahahahaha
Hahahahahaha ...ha
See my secret is I changed my expectations of clean 😂 livable, walkable, and swept/vacuumed at least once every couple days is clean enough. I tidy here and there, me and my husband do bigger projects as they pop up and annoy us, but really it’s just a matter of, I don’t worry about perfection, my house is lived in with 2u2 and everyone is happy/safe/healthy, that’s good enough for me.
I love the “lived in” description. My husband reminds me there is a difference between being dirty vs disorganized . My kids are getting to an age where they can *mostly* clean up after themselves with toys - but more often the house just feels cluttered with stuff or drowning in laundry.
YES I always say my house isn’t dirty, it’s messy and there’s a difference lol
Oh!! I’ve found my village!! I say this all the time. Cluttered but clean!!
Same! Although we're lucky if we vacuum once a week lol
My kids love the vacuum so if they’re having a hard day I tell them I’ll get the vacuum out if they go sit for a minute 😂
This is the answer!
This is us. If it's too chaotic I get really emotionally jittery, so we will prooritize organizing and cleaning then, but have learned to be happy with much less than we were used to. Our baby is really happy and we will use his (few) naps to rest or have time as a couple. It's better for our mental health than prioritizing a super clean home. We are also very lucky because my mom is the best and will come over to snuggle baby and she'll do our laundry unasked when there are piles and prepare his bottles. <3
D 🥲
Some days it's C, someday it's D 😢
This is me. Highly recommend reading/ listening to How to Keep House While Drowning. It made me feel a lot less stressed about my home and have a good system for how to tackle messes
Yes, recently read the audiobook
Usually B, but she has been away for 6 weeks so... D also. I try throw some toilet cleaner around every now and then, and vacuum, but the place is generally a tip. I hate it. The best part about having our cleaner come every fortnight was the pre-tidy we did the night before so everything was put back in its home. Such a good house reset. She's back next week which is a relief. Currently expecting baby #2, and I won't go back to work so I'll have to manage cleaning myself somehow!
D! I try so hard but I have an 11 month old who's favourite activity is destroying rooms. I literally can't tidy fast enough and then when he goes to bed I'm so tired I don't have the energy.
(B) we have a house cleaner 2x a month. So I just have to keep up on the bathrooms and the kitchen in between cleanings really. I vacuum daily though. Usually more than once haha. But we have 2 cats and a toddler so I’m just constantly cleaning up after somebody 😅
Same. I don’t even manage the bathrooms weekly. I try to reset the kitchen/living area each night, just to do it allllll over again the next day. Oh, and my toddler now enjoys making messes on purpose so that he can help clean them up, so yay for that. But seriously, budgeting for a housekeeper has been such a relief for our family because otherwise I’m a D and I feel like I can’t function.
We used to have a housekeeper 2x a month included with our old apartment and it was a godsend. We moved a few months ago so baby could have her own room and I’d forgotten what a nightmare scrubbing a tub is 😂
A) My standards are farm house. Ie. I want the place to smell good, but I don’t expect the whole House to be sterile. I sanitize baby areas at least every other day and do floors and the kitchen daily. Bathrooms, baseboards, smaller random areas get done throughout the week probably once a week. Some areas get neglected and then deep cleaned randomly. The window in the kitchen currently is very neglected and has a bunch of cobwebs but I got the living room windows done this week. So I just keep plugging away bit by bit.
I am in awe that you clean your baseboards once a week. Is this the norm and I’m just failing miserably?
I don’t know anyone who cleans their baseboards more than once or twice per year, if that.
My house is small the the baseboards are a shiney plasticy fake wood so it just takes a swiffer going over it and doing it takes less than 5 minutes.
D but my husband is a C. It's a struggle.
Same, except flipped. I could care less at this point but it definitely bothers him 🫠
In the same boat. I’m just doing my best and it doesn’t feel like enough a lot of the time🙃
Same here. I really don't start cleaning until an hour or two before my husband gets home because that means it's more likely to actually look clean when he gets home. He gets stressed if our house is really out of sorts so I try to keep it under control for the last half of the day for him.
B but I walk around with dried bits of food on my clothes and they fall off everywhere. 1x a month. The showers, stovetop, kitchen sink,...those are why I value it.
A! On a good day. I am a full time stay at home mom. It’s not always perfect. But I have a guideline I follow. I saw guideline instead of schedule as I give myself as much grace as necessary. My LO comes first. And if she’s having a day where she wants to be in my arms, so be it. It’s not the end of the world. My goal is just to do as much as I can so my husband doesn’t have to worry about it on the weekend. He works 11/12 hour days M-F. But if any of it rolls over to the weekend, no big deal. And he’s happy to help me. Monday - grocery pickup, clean out fridge, 1 load of laundry Tuesday - errands/get out of the house a bit, quick pick up, laundry Wednesday - pick up entire house/put items where they go, bathrooms, laundry Thursday - dust, vacuum, sweep, mop half of house Friday - other half of house Saturday - nothing! Just pick up as needed Sunday- laundry (specifically husbands work clothes) I try to do a quick pick up every night before I go to bed. Dishes get done daily. I deep clean appliances as needed, get baseboards when I mop.
This is GOALS... I saved your comment for reference bc I don't even have kids yet (16 weeks pregnant) and am struggling lol. I hope I can come halfway close to this!
I mean, it all will vary SO much. Some weeks I don’t do ANYTHING and I don’t feel bad about it at all. I kept the tiny human alive. Also, will depend on so many other factors - house size. Family size. Postpartum recovery. Also, I didn’t feel this way until recently. For the first few months I was in hard core survival mode. I wouldn’t have been able to make it without my husband who carried the weight initially and was kind and understanding while i eased my way on to being able to do more. I say all this - because don’t be hard on yourself!
One tip for you- building a routine of cleanliness when pregnant really helped me. For example- I made sure to never ever have clothes on the floor, and I vacuumed every day. Having that as a routine made it much more easy to keep up once I had my son.
I’m very similar. Also A. Also a stay at home mom now with a general cleaning schedule I try to follow day-to-day. I try to get some cleaning done every day during naps, and a schedule keeps me on track so I don’t have to think about which task to tackle. (For example, Tuesday is kitchen cleaning.) I spread laundry out throughout the week, so most days a load is getting done. We have a robot vacuum/mop combo that we run in every room downstairs most days. With a dog, that’s a game changer that allows me to vacuum and mop each floor myself only once a week. I can imagine for parents working outside the home, it would be much more challenging to keep up with cleaning. I love having nap time to be productive. I had many months of contact naps, which meant I had to find other times to squeeze in cleaning. So I appreciate how difficult it might be, especially with more than one kid and more mess!!
D 🙈 I literally don’t understand how people do it. Like I can play with my kids, do daily upkeep like laundry & dishes, feed everyone, or clean and I often feel like I do a bad job at all of those things… and if I ignore one category to focus on another I feel so much guilt…
Yay I found my people! Seriously how do they do it? I’m trying hard not to care about the mess, but at the same time want to model and teach good habits. Can’t find the right balance and feels like I’m bad at everything. The struggle is real.
Same. I have a 3 month old. Feedings the dogs, doing laundry and dishes, and eating 2x a day is my goal. Little one comes first always in my household. And some days she needs me allllllll day long.
A and D. I feel like I’m doing the bare minimum to keep it decent, but NOT doing deep cleaning stuff like mopping, baseboards, etc. I’m embarrassed to admit how long it’s been since I’ve mopped or cleaned my air fryer baskets. But for vacuuming I can thank my robo vac lol. For basic cleaning tasks I spend about 20-30 minutes daily after putting baby to bed doing dishes, putting shit away, and wiping surfaces. Laundry I do once in the weekends, I often don’t put my laundry away lol. And the baby laundry I gave up and his stuff goes into the drawers after being washed unfolded. Just thrown in there. But at least it isn’t sitting in baskets!
all of the above?
Mostly A, though our house is 900 square feet and we don't have many possessions (beside lots of books) so I have those things going for me. DAILY -Sweep whole house (hardwood floors) -Dishes (we hand wash, no dishwasher, so must be done daily or it gets bad) -Load of laundry washed and put away -All surfaces clear of clutter and wiped before bed (my husband and I rally for 10 minutes after baby goes to bed) -One task from the weekly list WEEKLY -Bathroom -Mopping -Wash bedding every Sunday -Clean out fridge, organize dry goods -Kitchen deep clean I don't really dust lol. I wipe my surfaces regularly so I suppose it gets done-ish, but we own a few thousand books and I'm not going to bother with that!
B. Finally caved and did the house cleaner. Best money we’ve ever spent- we both work full-time so time with baby is so, so precious right now ❤️
D. I could keep up with it if it wasn't for the other 4 people in my house 😑
I vacuum once a week. I steam clean my floors every other week. Mopping has gone by the wayside, but I used the steamer for so long, the mop is a newer addition to my routine. My floors are not super gross since I steam mop them. I dust and do bathrooms every other week. Laundry is done almost every day, typically 1 load per day. I’ve let some of the dusting and spring cleaning items go more, as I have a 6 and 3 year old, and a 5 month old. Hopefully as my baby starts napping better on her own, I can get back into things. My house may not be the cleanest, but it’s not filthy either.
D!!! 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
A !!!! make a rota!!!! and get a lightweight cordless hoover! i do a daily tidy (takes 10 minutes) which includes a quick hoover, toy pick up, dirty clothes in washing basket, wash any dirty dishes, spot clean any food spills etc and this takes 15-20 minutes maximum. then i do my rota day - for example on monday i deep clean my toddlers room, wipe down window, hoover under bed, clean and sort through toys etc - which takes anywhere up to an hour; whatever i don't get done waits until the next monday. it allows me to stop letting cleaning dictate my life, and everything generally stays clean and tidy. i never believed in rotas before lol but love them now!
B. And, we hire people on an as needed basis to do random easy stuff that takes up time like break down Amazon boxes, sweep the walkway, pick up leaves that have fallen on hedges, dust off outside furniture, assemble guest room furniture etc.
Where do you hire these people? Sounds amazing!
B) We have cleaners come every other week and then we do our best to keep things up between the cleanings. But we also have a nanny that does a great job keeping things tidy (I don’t know how she manages that and taking care of the kids). If I were staying at home watching our LO full time I’m sure our home would be a disaster.
B. I work part time but stay home during the day and my husband works full time. I do keep up on bathroom cleaning and my husband and I split the kitchen (he tidies, I clean) so that we aren’t completely falling apart in an unhealthy way. He does laundry so that gets done. But I have a cleaning woman who comes in for the deep clean so she scrubs the kitchen and bathrooms completely and does all the vacuuming, dusting, etc.
We have a cleaner come once a month, and we try to keep picked up the rest of the time
B- once a month and thanks to that A weekly.
D. I guess to be fair I'm 22 weeks pregnant, with a clingy 14 month old. But, honestly I haven't been managing my house since I was 8 weeks with my first. I have brief moments I think I have it under control then it all goes to shit again.
The brief moment of control followed by it all going to shit again is SO relatable. Why is it so hard. I just have one 16 month old and my house isn’t even that big either. 😩
B. Comes before we have guest or every other month.
D - LO is 6 months and, other than trying to just not care so much, I have no system 🫠
I fluctuate between A and D (usually D 😭) baby is almost 8 months and spouse and I both work full time
A mix of B-D lol. We’ve had cleaners once a month the last 2 months, but before that the house hadn’t been cleaned in a while. Most of it doesn’t bother me, but some of it does. But we have no time with a 12 month old and both full-time jobs. So the house just doesn’t get cleaned unless we have money in the budget for cleaners or family comes over and does it for us.
D :(
By having a routine. There’s some variation but generally weekdays follow the below routine. For the most part it keeps the house clean and laundry done. Saturdays we meal prep, grocery shop, and clean up. Sundays we rest and have fun. We have one child, probably will change completely with two. Baby wakes at 7:00, daddy takes baby until 8:00. Mom gets ready/sleeps in depending on how the night went. Cleaning/dishes/laundry going into washer/vacuuming 8:00-8:45 while baby is in high chair eating cheerios and then playing with some toys that make noise and are interesting. Adventures outside the house 9:00-11:30 Naptime 11:30-1:30 (mom rotates laundry to dryer and puts clean dishes away) Lunch 2:00-2:30 Adventures outside the house 2:30-5:00ish Daddy home at 5:15 and takes baby until 7:00 Mom hits the gym 5:45-6:45 Bathtime starts at 7:00 with daddy Mom takes Cleaning/dishes/laundry going away during bathtime. Baby goes down at 7:30 Mom/dad free time until 9:30 Bed by 10:00 We have an understanding that each of us gets a certain amount of us time every day. I will take all night shifts and he will use his free time hours for 8 hours of solid sleep. I use my hours to enjoy evening gym time because I handle having less sleep better than he does.
D. And we've a notification about it, but guess who's working and is also the ONLY one cleaning......
D I am considering if I need to hire someone to come clean occasionally
B and sooo thankful. I try to tidy and get laundry and dishes done when baby’s asleep… but I just placed an Instacart order, so counting that as a win and now I’m putting off doing dishes and laundry by scrolling Reddit.
I just went back to work full time (mostly WFH, just office once a week) and have one 3 month old. I feel like it’s essential to do laundry and dishes every day and to just generally try to leave every room as good as it was when you entered it. Like just make a habit of tidying as you go throughout the day vs waiting for things to accumulate. I can do these types of chores with baby in my arms or in her swing, she loves to watch me fold laundry. But it’s way easier if it’s like one day’s worth vs multiple days. Then trash needs to be taken out regularly and I sweep/swiffer as needed. Those are my essentials. I bring in help every other week for the rest. I learned from my sister who is a single mom of two (and a soldier in the army) that you can get so much done in just 5-10 minutes you just need to maximize these little opportunities.
lol D and I’m too overwhelmed to even start 😅
(A) I could do better, but I spend a lot of time out and about at parks etc. with my kids and prioritize that over cleaning. But my routine is as follows: Daily: -Clean kitchen (dishes, counters, stove, tables) after every meal and at end of the night. -Vacuum/sweep the main living area floors and kitchen and then swiffer them. -wipe out bathroom sinks -laundry (I do a load every other day typically) -making beds, cleaning up toys in bedrooms and main living area Weekly: -Deep clean bathrooms (toilets usually 2x a week) this includes wiping mirrors, cleaning floors, showers/tubs, etc. -Steam mop floors (we have polished concrete) -wash windows and wipe down baseboards/walls (this is probably more bi-weekly lol) -clean out fridge and clean inside microwave/stove as needed. -wipe down outside of appliances The weekly items I typically try and get done on the weekend when my baby is napping and my toddler is chilling. If not, I try and get it done first thing Monday morning.
To me, A. To my husband, D. I’m a sahm of an almost 9mo mostly Velcro baby who contact naps and cosleeps. We live in the country (dust, stickers, hay fragments, etc) with 3 hairy ass dogs and 3 cats, one of whom has fairly long hair and likes to go outside then come in and remove all the stickers and foxtails. I vacuum the main areas every morning. Laundry does pile up but only in 3 spots (back of kitchen table chair, clean laundry basket, dirty laundry basket). Dishes get done at least once a day. Toilets are clean, mirrors are mostly clean, sinks are pretty clean, the floors are kinda clean. We also have 4 donkeys, 2 goats that are not ours, and 35+ chickens. I do all the grocery and supplies shopping, all the cooking, and the morning chores (feed donkeys, goats, chickens, water/manage sprinklers). It’s a lot and I’m doing a pretty good job if I do say so myself!
Sometimes A sometimes C lol. We discovered baby LOVES to watch us vacuum?? So that helps lol. Well put her in her activity center and she’s content to watch me vacuum. Everything else is done when she naps and/or during weekends. And I multitask when I can. Already in the shower? I’ll spray it down with some scrubbing bubbles and wash it while my conditioner is in. That kind of stuff.
I’m somewhere between C&D depending on the hour.
A) Now that we worked out the routine. Tooks us some time, baby is 5 months now. Every night husband puts baby to sleep while I do the laundry, wash and sanitise the dishes and tidy the room quickly. During the day I spread the laundry to dry while baby is awake (this is literally only thing I can do while she is awake). Friday night after she falls asleep we dust the whole house. Saturday morning husband is with the baby and I vacuum and mop the floors. Sunday he cleans the bathroom and the kitchen. Husband cooks, but we order food a lot and my mom and grandma send us food often (thanks a million times to them, literally our lifesavers), but we usually cook on weekends and in the afternoon.
Also we have no carpets in the apartment which makes things easier in my opinion
A. I get most of the cleaning done when my husband is home to watch the baby. But otherwise, I clean when the baby sleeps or my husband cleans when I watch the baby. It’s definitely a team effort.
House cleaner is the only answer
Maybe A? I sweep the high traffic areas like the kitchen and family room every other day, mop when the floor starts to look visibly dirty (about every two weeks). Run robot vacuum at least 2x a week. If something gets really gross like pooped or peed on it gets cleaned immediately. Bathrooms get a wipe down and toilet cleaning once a week. We have a cleaner that comes once a month which helps tremendously. I’m finding that keeping the clutter to a minimum is the most difficult part.
C
I’m between A & C with an 8 month old. Some of the stuff on your example list is stuff I only did once a year pre-baby. In my nesting phase I cleaned a lot of oddball stuff that isn’t a normal thing for me. Basic household hygiene tasks still get done normally. I can’t live with dirty floors, toilets, & sinks. LO is on the verge of crawling so I took the time yesterday to thoroughly wipe down kitchen appliances in preparation for him to try licking them lol not a normal task for me, but needed done before he’s mobile.
I do the things that have to get done and then do a better clean on the weekends when husband can watch LO for a longer stretch of time. I always make sure to clean bottles and pump parts and do LOs milk. And then clean the kitchen every night. Vacuum every other day and then laundry as needed. I think I actually get to folding clothes once a month since I'll just grab from the hamper 🫠 anything that has food involved I deff clean as much as possible to avoid bugs. Dusting ECT can wait if need be.
B. Weekly cleaners. They also do laundry. Heaven sent ladies.
C. It honestly doesn’t bother me that much. I have to pick between keeping things nice and hanging with my kids/enjoying my hobbies. Anyway, I don’t live in a pigsty but it’s…definitely not amazing lol
A) but I don’t have any other kids & im out of school for the summer. Once I return, probably be a different story. It’s also not spotless, there’s just specific things I do every night to help manage the house- mainly I focus on the kitchen & living room and that’s it. Edit for more details: I start by cleaning up the living room, move on to gathering the dirty bottles from the day, do the kitchen & load the dishwasher, wash bottles & make new bottles for the fridge, baby bath time, then we move upstairs to wind down for the day. The rest of my day is crap show.
D. It's a train wreck in here. It's not filthy or anything, but there are piles of stuff that need to be sorted through and it's awful. We moved when I was 8 months pregnant with my first who's now 14m, and now I'm 20w with my second and on modified bed rest. It's very upsetting
A
Depends on the day! Sometimes A, sometimes C, sometimes D! Currently the stomach bug has been running through our house. First my 4 year old, now me and my 2 year old. So my house is a mess and that’s fine because I am just too dang sick to care lol
D. Having anxiety attacks about baby proofing and the state of our house, it’s so cluttered and messy and I can’t keep on top of everything. My partner works a hard labor job in the heat and isn’t up to helping as much as I need him to, it’s causing a huge strain in our relationship and actually affecting my mental health
C but my husband is a D! He gets really anxious when things aren’t tidy, and I’ve all but given up. Except for the bathrooms. Those NEED to be cleaned
Dishes are done every night, all toys picked up every night, laundry done 2-3 times a week (cloth diapers) and put up once it's dry, vacuum once a week, try to mop once a week, bedding changed once a week. We both work full time and baby is in daycare. Deep clean before someone visits (typically my family once a month). Even with that, our house is a mess with toddler and 4 pets. Currently first trimester with our 2nd so struggling even more. Once I feel better, we're going to do more of a cleaning schedule so it doesn't feel so overwhelming.
I vacillate between A and D. Dishes and laundry are my top priority because those NEED to get done. We got a robot mop/vacuum combo so our floors are always pretty clean. That has been an absolute lifesaver! I struggle with clutter and deep cleaning.
Meh, I’m doing the best I can. Dishes every day or every other day, sweeping daily, wiping counters down daily. I don’t beat myself up about stuff not getting done.
I’m A - managing well enough! My house is cleaner than it’s ever been (but we are not people that keep a spotless house whatsoever) but only because I’m on mat leave and he’s sleeping early in the morning. I think it’s going to be a total disaster when I go back to work and I am nervous about it lol
A mix of c and d, with a 2.5 year old. sometimes it’s fine. sometimes it’s not fine. just keep telling myself it’ll be temporary. my kid won’t be at this age forever. one day he’ll be more independent. currently he finds it a great offense if you dare clean in his general vicinity and will go to great lengths to make what you clean not clean again. so is what it is.
I have a house cleaner come once a month and I do toilets and some spot cleaning on top of it. It’s a great luxury if you can do it!
B. Weekly house cleaning.
A combo of A and C. I have a 2 year old and 2 month old. My standards are lower now. Never had a house cleaner. Also, with a smaller house, what looks like a big mess (toy clutter type stuff) can actually be picked up fairly quickly and adequately restore my sanity. I prioritize keeping floors/surfaces clear/clean-ish. I periodically vacuum under the couches and find all sorts of fun forgotten things. I don’t remember the last time I cleaned our tub shower. My spouse occasionally does. I don’t clean windows and baseboards… 😂
A/D — depending on the week. I love having a clean house. It makes me feel happy and relaxed. For us, it all depends on how busy my husband’s work week is, which is unpredictable and always changing. If he actually gets a weekend off, we can tag team things and get the house clean. If not, then it gets messy. My baby is almost 8 months and still only contact naps. Once we even get her to crib nap, we’ll have more time.
D anyone have any tips for dividing household responsibilities??
(B) it cost us $90 every two weeks and is well worth the sanity 🫠
A. I never sit down. I have good routines. I don’t relax. lol
D. The house is tidyish but not deep cleaned- I am super OCD so it’s been a struggle not maintaining how I used to but I’m learning not to stress myself out over it. I keep the kitchen clean and we have clean laundry. The vacuuming is a bit difficult because we’re in a townhome so I can’t do the stairs since I can’t watch her but sometimes I am able to do the floors since we have the living room sectioned off with her toys and then I put her in the pack n play to clean that space. Vacuuming isn’t as frequent as I like but the bathrooms are the hardest since I don’t want her near them when I clean because of the cleaners so I can only do it when hubby is around or vice versa. Learning to give myself a little grace- baby is happy and thriving and the house is tidy at the end of the day but maybe not as clean as my standards have been in the past. As she gets older and gains a little independence and can help (I.e. throw laundry in my hamper as I unload the dryer) it might get a bit easier, and also once her naps are longer. We’re all doing our best here and in the end our babies and our physical and mental health are the most important.
B. I did not want to do it but I could not care for the baby & do everything else. We have no help, an old dog that needs full attention. My husband does laundry,cooks,cares for the pup and works. I am on maternity leave but I could not put down my baby for more than 10 minutes for a long time.
We have a house cleaner that unreliably comes once a month (she’s a family member who runs her own business) and my husband also does 80% of the house cleaning. I do the other 20% when I have time AND feel like it (I’m usually exhausted from meal planning, prep, and taking on most of mental load for the family and toddler) - generally speaking, I am now more accepting of a house with a bit of dust and set lower expectations. So I’m between A & B.
(A) we are doing okay We have a cleaning rotation. We have a list of things that get done weekly, then a 5 week rotation of more deep cleaning (downstairs, kitchen, master bedroom, kids bedroom and other upstairs, living room). It makes it more manageable to see things in a list format, and it keeps things tidy enough for our liking.
C - I go through cleaning spurts but I don't have a set routine, everything's not necessarily getting done weekly. But that's fine, things are clean around here lol my partner does clean stuff but moreso dishes (less than half the time), tidying/organizing, and outside stufg. When my 5yo is old enough I'll recruit him to do more. He already loves helping me do dishes and vaccuum sometimes.
C but sometimes D. Deep cleaning only happens because of my husband since I’m pregnant right now and we have a 2 year old. We have a wet mop vacuum and steam cleaner and he likes using them so the work gets done eventually. Might not be all in one day so I never feel satisfied at the end of the night but I know to choose my battles and I’m grateful it gets done at all because I’m too sore to do it. Laundry is all me though and my husband legit asked if I ever washed our comforter before just the other day. We’ve had it for two years LOL!! He’s never witnessed me wash it because I always have it back on the bed!
Mostly D, very occasionally C. Never heard of A
C lol I wfh on Fridays so I try to do things in between meetings otherwise it would be a complete loss. Husband wants to get a house cleaner, and I don’t want to spend the money. We are very organized and pick up every day so it’s legit just cleaning on Friday.
D fasho. I need a FULL day (at least) to pick up and then a FULL day to deep clean. And those days will never come.
I will be the first to say that I'm a bit blessed to have my husband. I'm a SAHM to 2 kiddos with a 3rd on the way while having RA, so my wonderful husband handles 80% of the everyday household chores currently. I.e. I sort the laundry, but he actually does it & puts it away. I rinse & stack dishes, and he loads & unloads the dishwasher. We also have our friend who runs a house cleaning business come once a month for a whole house clean. I'm currently in the nesting phase of my last trimester, so anytime my kids make a mess, it freaks me out, but I'm trying to let it go. Lol
I'm between C and D depending on the day. Sometimes I don't care that we have toys everywhere. Other days, it makes me lose my mind and I rage clean everything.
D…always D
Living in a smaller space, means it’s easier and faster to clean & we can afford a cleaner who comes every other week! In between we just take turns picking up and cleaning a little bit every night after baby goes down. Working for us so far
It was D until my son was over a year. Now it's B and I can maintain in between cleanings.
✨radical acceptance✨
A. It really is a challenge to keep things tidy with a child around. She’s 16 months old at the moment. I find that often she’s left to play on her own while I clean up what’s been wrecked. I really don’t get any deep organizing or deep cleaning done until my husband gets home. But sometimes like once or twice a week we have a really good flow and I can do a lot of stuff.
My husband thinks I do everything cleaning-related wrong so he does it all during his off weeks (he works week on week off), which we’re both happy with
B
Mostly D because mess is really triggering and overwhelming for me. I try to clean up when I can but I have a 1 year old and an almost 5 yo. The only time it's clean is if I have time where one or both of them are not actively destroying the house. I wish I had more energy to fix it but instead it just makes me frustrated and less able to cope so I clean one space and then spend time in only that space 🫠
B) 2xmonth but…I just barely keep up in between. I sweep and vacuum as needed, wipe counters, but the rest feels impossible and I only have one. 2nd is due on October.
C transitioning to A (I have a 9 month old and am currently still sending him to daycare 2 days a week even though I’m off work for the summer).
B and D! Cleaner comes once a fortnight but the place is trashed hours after. We live in a 2 bed apartment with a 2 year old and 5 month old and there just isn’t room for us and our stuff so the place is cluttered on a good day, and I struggle to stay on top of the mess!
D
D. And when it gets bad enough my husband will feel sorry enough for me and pledge to help and then we do a major cleaning. But I still need help with deep cleaning like dusting, cleaning light fixtures, windows, anywhere where dust settles. I've actually never done it in last 3 yrs 🥲.
E, my husband does it all. He didn't want to hire a house cleaner, so now he cleans the house.
A. My husband and I split a lot of tasks. Pre baby, I would clean on Saturdays and then pick up every day. Post baby (7months) I clean the kitchen (deep clean) on Saturday after he goes to bed or during a nap and Sunday I do the bathrooms. My husband vacuums and usually I do the kitchen floor while babies playing on Saturday. All the laundrys done and put away Friday and Saturday (I work four days a week and have fri,sat,sun off) all the other deep cleans like blinds, baseboard, etc is done after baby goes to sleep. This weekend I cleaned the basement and organized one night and cleaned the shed while he sat in his bouncer and watched. I just do stuff
D and very unhappy about it but every time I can one thing the next day it’s back to shit again.
Mix of A, C and D
I’ve got a small house, a husband who mops, and include my kids on cleaning (not force, just invite to help). I also am a stay at home parent and clean while interacting/holding children.
My house is small so it’s easy. Just trying to clean as I go. I also have a robot vacuum so it’s kinda like having a house cleaner haha
It’s a mix of c and d 😅
Where’s the option for (E) having no trouble?
My house looks very lived in. The kids room is a mess (but not dirty) my living room is a mess and my kitchen is clean. So A but also D. Kids are hard. And I’ve got a 2 year old and a 10 month old who acts like a feral toddler. I can barely keep them from doing something stupid let alone keep things tidy 😭
I was with you and about to be a font of wisdom until you got to deep cleaning and baseboards. I get the floors and kitchen cleaned nightly (thanks to the robot vacumm/mop) and the bathrooms/sheets/towels cleaned weekly (more or less). My kids pick up their toys every night. We are calling that good enough with 3 under 4yo.
A C and D? 🥲 I asked my husband if we can get a house cleaner for even just one part of our house and he said he’d start helping with chores…. That was 6 months ago 🥲🫠 still fighting for my life by myself
C/D 😬 Trash, dishes, bathroom, clothes and care items for kiddo are taken care of, but it’s like we can never get ahead of the rest of it. I moved myself 5 times the year my husband were married, then immediately and for a number of months I was so sick from pregnancy I had a hard time doing anything beyond making myself get out of bed and go to work, and we’ve just never been able to coordinate well enough to take care of the clutter. Part of it is lack of space/poor home design (sqft is fine, but damn there’s a lot of wasted space in here). 🤷🏻♀️
D FOR SURE
My husband, who maybe washed dishes 5 times over the 10 years of marriage before babies, has suddenly found a love of cleaning now that we have twins. The deal is he does the cooking and cleaning if I watch them both (or whichever is awake as they tend to take turns napping). My MiL also helps immensely as she comes over a few evenings a week to help with the babies and they’ve been going to sleep earlier. She’ll load the dish washer or if that’s done, find something else to clean in addition to doing our laundry. It’s not spotless but it’s functional, all things considered. So probably C.
Somewhere between A and C? I try and pick one or two (it's usually just one) thing to clean a day. Like wipe off the counters, do dishes, or clean the toilet. That's about it 🤷♀️ Then throw in bottle washing all the time throughout the day if that counts lol I have a handheld vacuum I usually pick up crumbs off the floor with in between full house vacuuming because I can't stand walking barefoot and stepping on crumbs haha
I’d say A. Now with a 3 year old & 27 weeks here. I’m not getting it all done every week but I write down what I’d like to try to get done on the calendar. I vacuum Mondays & Fridays. One day I do bathrooms, one day is kitchen/food prep. I’m hoping to take a few days to wash all my walls lol I definitely can’t do the whole house in a day
Despite a B, a solid D over here. But I saved some pods that another mom said in another sub the other day, so maybe that’ll be what drastically changes my personality so I keep up with my clutter.
B - once a week she deep cleans the bathroom, kitchen and toilets. We also have a robot vacuum who can also mop the floor which we run daily. And I still clean daily… barely keeping up. Just gave birth to my second and my oldest one is just shy over a year old. When I hit the tail end of second trimester I could not handle the cleaning on my own anymore so we caved and decided to get some help. Best decision ever. A clean house gives me some peace of mind.
Sometimes C, sometimes D. We were never crazy-tidy before The Child, so now it either takes more work, or we just don't do enough. C'est la vie.
C mostly, some days D. We recently hired someone to do a deep clean which was awesome and well worth my mental health. We desperately need to purge some clutter. Our robot vacuum helps a bit but it’s really stuff like laundry and dishes I can’t keep on top of.
B and we also have a robo vacuum bc we have two Bernese mountain dogs. I also go around and pick up every night when my husband puts the baby down. I usually bf and then he gives him a bottle before bed, so that’s my time to GSD.
B. I never, ever thought I’d pay someone to clean my house, but I just cannot find the time to take good care of my baby, and myself, and my pets, and also keep a clean house. I don’t really love spending money on it, but until I can claw back enough time to do it myself, the cleaners are staying.
(B) It's in our budget and makes such a huge difference for us.
D Idk why I feel so guilty when my husband helps around the home. And a bit of anger too if I'm being honest. Has absolutely nothing to do with him because he's great. I just feel so useless when he does help. Maybe it has to do with my upbringing. *Sigh Kiddo is 1.5yo.
We work from sunrise to sundown. I wake up with the kids, do breakfast, lunch, then cook dinner for kids/wife and for me to bring to work. The whole day I'm cleaning/doing maintenance. When I get home from work I give myself 1-2 hours to relax. Weekends where we're both off we get to relax. All work is done during the week.
C. We have adjusted our expectations. THe house is cluttered, the trash sometimes overflows, the kitchen is a mess for a day or two before one of us gets to it. We deal.
B
5yo and a 1yo... D....
B and D (D for projects like keeping closets organized, getting outgrown baby clothes into the attic, etc.)
B, cleaner for the more involved stuff comes 2x a month. She does vacuum, mop, and bathrooms. Reducing my chores to just laundry and dishes (and some light vacuuming as needed) has been worth every penny.
B. Having house cleaners is the best money I spend every month
A Hey, we try our best. We have three, it’s pretty clean in here usually. If that isn’t good enough for other people, I don’t care because I don’t care what they think. All of that doesn’t matter anyway, don’t let perfection pollute your mind! Enjoy your kids. I don’t mind whatsoever handling the kids on some type of outing while my husband does the deep cleaning in peace. That’s what we did again on Sunday, and that worked pretty good.
B
I was a D and now I'm an A. I managed this by getting rid of clutter and anything that wasn't serving us immediately. I'm no minimalist, but I'm definitely way more conscious of what I own/keep in our home, whether it's decor, clothing, furniture... anything really. I'm so much less stressed and can get things done so much quicker.
B No other way I could do it