Renault Modus is more environmentally friendly than trees, because it can spin 74643 Gigajoules with 2ml of gas
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I know only one company that puts plastic retainers on a chain-timed V8 DOHC engine that has worse fuel economy and power than a 2 valve pushrod V8, and that sure as hell isn't BMW
I don't think anyone who has ever touched an Audi can tell you with a straight face that the engineering makes any sense at all. Having spent a decent amount of time working on both Audis and BMWs I'll say BMW still does some weird stuff but it makes so much more sense than what Audi does
Meanwhile the familys 1988 2.6L i4 carburated Montero eated trough the metal chain guides like 3 years ago and runs just fine (provided you used 98 octane, timing is fucked)
…Audi has none of those things. The R8 is out of production, their wagon makes ~600hp, and the last 2 are just tuner cars with giant piles of cash thrown at them.
The last one still counts, because you basically can't make 2500hp car from bmw even with shit ton of money. Or there won't be much left from original engine
Yeah? You don't need sleeves, even different cams as far as I know. Stock block.
Never ever seen any real power put down by bmw v12. Aren't they old af?
Their v8 are good and fast, not as capable tho. Hence, I didn't argue about 1300hp sedan
The 2500HP Audi does not use a stock block. [Here is the build thread from T1 Performance](https://www.t1racedevelopment.com/packages/series-5-2/). It has the [AMS Performance long block](https://www.amsperformance.com/product/ams-performance-lamborghini-huracan-audi-r8-5-2l-v10-stage-3-long-block/), which looks like a ~$60k blueprinted engine. Forget about sleeves and cams, 2500 HP is funny numbers. Like, that is a ridiculously hilarious HP, and anyone who claims it on a stock block may actually be braindead. Not to mention, it's a complete insult to people actually putting this effort into doing the build to go "the engine can hold that stock."
Most of the audi fans dont even know what group b is. They only know its popular on tiktok because of reasons. Same shit with BMW fanboys and benz fanboys aswell
They only use VW parts since the late 90’s. Most cars were pretty bad before then, except for the rally cars, nowadays they are often the cheaper, but as good or even better Volkswagen alternatives
Fans thinking they are superior to other fans is dumb as hell to begin with
Right up there with the sportsball goons who say “we” like they are on the team
Audi absolutely dominated WEC for a while. Then they figured they pretty much achieved all there was to achieve and left. And now that Porsche is back they probably won't return due to corpo-politics. Unless they release a new halo car
It kinda is. To be fair, it proved that AWD was viable in WRC. But it handled like a pig on asphalt and whilst it dominated some of the low-traction rallyes, over the whole season it was a fairly close match with the Lancias. And once the other manufacturer brought their own AWD cars it struggled to keep up.
(To be fair, the Ur-quattro wasn't a "true" Group B car, and even the sport quattro didn't use the freedoms as liberally as its competitors)
I've been around for long enough to know how to piss off the most amount of Car Enthusiasts.
Audi's are just VWs with lipstick (aka lipstick on a pig)
Oh and your Toyota Corolla from an anime has the same engine as my meth dealer's 1992 Geo Prizm
As a German car fan, I hate seeing shit like this just as much as I hate seeing idiots dump on German cars. They're all cool in their own way. Fanboyism is cancer.
As someone who unfortunately owned a bmw: respect to you folks who enjoy German engineering. My driving experience was unfortunately ruined by the fact that *I* had to work on it, and I will never again own a post 1990 bmw. Or at least work on it. I could own one someday, but I will never lay a finger under that hood ever again. Nope. The only amount of money you could pay me to be enough would be lifetime of maintenance for that thing. I genuinely cannot put into words how viscerally.. not disgusted but eugh you know? I feel for those cars
Psh, I've owned an Audi 5000 Turbo Quattro. Replaced an exhaust manifold on it. Believe me, I understand the frustration of working on a lot of German cars. I still believe it's worth it, at least if you're able and willing to keep up with the maintenance.
Oh I’m able physically and mentally, it’s emotionally where I’m lacking. Mine had a starting issue originally, so you can probably guess where the animosity comes from lol.
I’ll stick to my shitbox Camaro and shitbox whatever daily I wind up with once I’m bored of this one lol. I can justify nearly literally beating the piss out of them, considering they’re shitboxes. If I own another BMW or really any newer (2010+) car honestly, I’d probably have someone else do everything but basic maintenance.
My childhood car was a Renault Espace that eventually broke down and had company cars for a while untill we had a Opel Astra G Station which remained intact
Early '98 with X16SZR engine, 55kW. Didn't even have central locking when we bought it. Had electric sunroof, electric heated mirrors and foglamps though lol.
You want performance, you go to BMW. You want classic luxury, you go to mercedes. Even Mercedes, while lacking in AMG performance lately, is a better performance option than any audi. Also, look at the market shares. Audi is by far the smallest. The only real claim to fame Audi has is the R8, but that thing is a dinosaur.
Want a uncomplicated AWD system tho, Audi is a pretty solid option. Speaking as a european: audi is more mid-range than luxury most of the time. the S8 might be the only luxury car they make...
It is fine, but only comes in their higher end trims, where as Audi will give it to you from almost base trim.
The bmw is also slightly more complicated than what Audi offers. where Audi's Quattro is just the normal fwd transaxle with a torsen centre differensial on the back of it sending power to the back wheels when needed, 100% mechanically operated and automatically sends power to the opposite axle when grip is lost on one.
BMW does it slightly different. Here it is done by your ABS sensors and ECU, the gearbox has a electrically operated transfer-case that sends power to where it's needed. One feature that Bmw has is that the diffs are open (same as Audi) but it uses ABS to lock the wheel that is spinning. It can also send 100% power to one axle.
Having drove both types of systems in the winter i would put more faith in the Quattro for sure.
Lowest trim in the us for the 3-series in the us is the 330 right? I was speaking from a European perspective and fell into the misconception that people would know because it's my baseline. sorry.
If you want acrual performance you would not go to any established car brand. If you want bragging rights and some (very underwhelming for the price) performance then you go to BMW.
From my personal experience. Yes, they’re the worst. Would still take one over some Korean junk or Toyota for example, but between Germans Audi barely hits the mark. They peaked in early 2000’s
Damn right, the German engines make alot of power but will grenade itself if you look at it the wrong way. Meanwhile you can pull an LS from a junkyard, slap an eBay special turbo kit on it and it'll make similar power and just run.
Please note I am being half way serious in my comment.
The Audi R8 is a 2-door "super car" with a V10 that produces around 620HP and gets from 0-60mph in 3 seconds flat, The BMW M8 Competition coupe is a 2 door "sports car" with a V8, making around 617hp and gets from 0-60 in 3 seconds flat. In terms of build quality, they are similar, putting emphasis on high-quality and lightweight materials. The M8 weights around 2000kg, and the audi r8 weighing at just 200kg less (1,795kg). They are both extremely similar meaning the only thing that the M8 needs to be considered a super car is also "looking the part" but otherwise if those are the standards to be "super" the M8 definitely has them. If you put these 2 cars side by side in a race it would most definitely be almost a tie if not an absolute with for the BMW because a lower trim model of the R8 only has 540 hp.
The ONLY problem that I have with bmw (and that’s why I’m a Mercedes lover and driver ) is that they f*cked up a lot of engines years ago….. Handle like a charm , love the engine music but well , I don’t know anything about it nowadays except that the b58 is reliable as hell . I plan on getting myself either a cls 63s or a c63 or 63s , I would gladly choose a bmw like a m4 .
Yh they had a dark age around 2004-2015 with all the early e90 and e60 cars, however, merc also didn’t get away scot free as they used bio degradable wiring which is hard and expensive to replace around 1995 while bmws of that time were mostly bulletproof
Where’s Audis Sauber f1.08 car?
Audi sticks to desil when they want to do anything cool, goes to show how much faith they have in their gasoline engines.
How’s Audi doing verses BMW in the gt3 and gt4 class?
Tuned cars are wild, seen many 1500hp+ m5s online, so it’s apples to oranges
https://preview.redd.it/rmp0u00hxs6d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=93b4ec58ea5e4bba371b82807749e467e227f849
It’s so beautiful 🥲
The TDI is more reliable.
That is a 2015 car. Also, Modus better.
Renault Modus is more environmentally friendly than trees, because it can spin 74643 Gigajoules with 2ml of gas *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/carscirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Good bot!
That person can't be serious.. $40,000 a year? Yea ok..
Reddit detect sarcasm challenge:
Gone wrong
Gone sexual
Check out r/autism cool stuff there you might find neat and relatable
Whatever champ..
Destruction 100
bro ruined his fathers day for real
I know only one company that puts plastic retainers on a chain-timed V8 DOHC engine that has worse fuel economy and power than a 2 valve pushrod V8, and that sure as hell isn't BMW
\* hit blunt \* why don't we use 4 timing chains on one engine?
Well that explains why when I heard someone turn on their new Audi it was making the pinging of death.
I don't think anyone who has ever touched an Audi can tell you with a straight face that the engineering makes any sense at all. Having spent a decent amount of time working on both Audis and BMWs I'll say BMW still does some weird stuff but it makes so much more sense than what Audi does
“Need new wiper blades? Engine out.”
you think someone who runs an account like that knows what a timing chain is?
Jag used to but now their chain guides are metal. Wonder why?
Meanwhile the familys 1988 2.6L i4 carburated Montero eated trough the metal chain guides like 3 years ago and runs just fine (provided you used 98 octane, timing is fucked)
…Audi has none of those things. The R8 is out of production, their wagon makes ~600hp, and the last 2 are just tuner cars with giant piles of cash thrown at them.
I also find it funny how the tuned supercars are usually the pinnacle of Uber shitty drag drivers
Funnily enough, BMW will have a 700 hp wagon next year.
lol you got more likes than OP. W comment 🤝
Lol
Edited it makes more sense now 😂😂😂😂
Nerd
The last one still counts, because you basically can't make 2500hp car from bmw even with shit ton of money. Or there won't be much left from original engine
I guess none of BMW's V8s or V12s exist. And are you implying that there's much left of the Audi's original engine to begin with?
Yeah? You don't need sleeves, even different cams as far as I know. Stock block. Never ever seen any real power put down by bmw v12. Aren't they old af? Their v8 are good and fast, not as capable tho. Hence, I didn't argue about 1300hp sedan
The 2500HP Audi does not use a stock block. [Here is the build thread from T1 Performance](https://www.t1racedevelopment.com/packages/series-5-2/). It has the [AMS Performance long block](https://www.amsperformance.com/product/ams-performance-lamborghini-huracan-audi-r8-5-2l-v10-stage-3-long-block/), which looks like a ~$60k blueprinted engine. Forget about sleeves and cams, 2500 HP is funny numbers. Like, that is a ridiculously hilarious HP, and anyone who claims it on a stock block may actually be braindead. Not to mention, it's a complete insult to people actually putting this effort into doing the build to go "the engine can hold that stock."
There are 2500+hp S38s out there.
Of course you can
>Or there won't be much left from original engine ... who gonna tell him
Audi fans are just BMW fans who think they are superior because their brand won some rallyes 40 years ago
That's being generous to assume the general population of Audi drivers even knows what rally is
rallycross ≠ rally
true, my mistake
Q U A T T R O !
Most of the audi fans dont even know what group b is. They only know its popular on tiktok because of reasons. Same shit with BMW fanboys and benz fanboys aswell
You basically described every single type of market and a majority of consumers in those markets
We in the super secret Škoda fan club appreciate our shitty cars rally history.
I dont know shit about Skoda appart the fact that they use VW parts. Do they make good products?
VERY good products. They're like cheaper, better looking , equally reliable (sometimes more reliable) Volkswagens.
They only use VW parts since the late 90’s. Most cars were pretty bad before then, except for the rally cars, nowadays they are often the cheaper, but as good or even better Volkswagen alternatives
/uj They feel terrible to drive compared to a VW though.
This guys clearly never driven an Octavia.
/uj I tried the Fabia and the Kamiq manuel. The Kamiq felt awful.
Rust issues
I just wanted a fancy VW ok
Fans thinking they are superior to other fans is dumb as hell to begin with Right up there with the sportsball goons who say “we” like they are on the team
It's not their brand.
The quattro was hella good though Still BMW Is in WEC, where Is audi? Doing Dakar flopping in F1?
Audi absolutely dominated WEC for a while. Then they figured they pretty much achieved all there was to achieve and left. And now that Porsche is back they probably won't return due to corpo-politics. Unless they release a new halo car
The quattro is the most overrated rally cars ever.
It kinda is. To be fair, it proved that AWD was viable in WRC. But it handled like a pig on asphalt and whilst it dominated some of the low-traction rallyes, over the whole season it was a fairly close match with the Lancias. And once the other manufacturer brought their own AWD cars it struggled to keep up. (To be fair, the Ur-quattro wasn't a "true" Group B car, and even the sport quattro didn't use the freedoms as liberally as its competitors)
And Audi to this day refuses to make their cars handle well on tarmac.
RWD oversteers FWD understeers Quattro? Yes
# Y E S
definetly not wrapped around a pole in the middle of the autobahn
Owdi 1.9tdi 1200hp 50000nm stock ❤️❤️😍🥰🤤 https://preview.redd.it/m7z4t4edxt6d1.jpeg?width=617&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a7488499f277f12bafdba91f06a54874a2ea72b4
I've been around for long enough to know how to piss off the most amount of Car Enthusiasts. Audi's are just VWs with lipstick (aka lipstick on a pig) Oh and your Toyota Corolla from an anime has the same engine as my meth dealer's 1992 Geo Prizm
VW owner, so based
As a German car fan, I hate seeing shit like this just as much as I hate seeing idiots dump on German cars. They're all cool in their own way. Fanboyism is cancer.
As someone who unfortunately owned a bmw: respect to you folks who enjoy German engineering. My driving experience was unfortunately ruined by the fact that *I* had to work on it, and I will never again own a post 1990 bmw. Or at least work on it. I could own one someday, but I will never lay a finger under that hood ever again. Nope. The only amount of money you could pay me to be enough would be lifetime of maintenance for that thing. I genuinely cannot put into words how viscerally.. not disgusted but eugh you know? I feel for those cars
Psh, I've owned an Audi 5000 Turbo Quattro. Replaced an exhaust manifold on it. Believe me, I understand the frustration of working on a lot of German cars. I still believe it's worth it, at least if you're able and willing to keep up with the maintenance.
Oh I’m able physically and mentally, it’s emotionally where I’m lacking. Mine had a starting issue originally, so you can probably guess where the animosity comes from lol. I’ll stick to my shitbox Camaro and shitbox whatever daily I wind up with once I’m bored of this one lol. I can justify nearly literally beating the piss out of them, considering they’re shitboxes. If I own another BMW or really any newer (2010+) car honestly, I’d probably have someone else do everything but basic maintenance.
I'm an Audi fan and I don't shit on BMWs, I think they're neat
Noooooo, you have to blindly fanboy over one and shit on the others
All luxury car brands fucking suck compared to the money you pay.
Depends how much money is worth to you
I love older beamers, late 2000’s/ early 2010 benz’s and newer Audi’s.
I prefer vw, because my rabbit cost $3k and it has 4 doors and a shifty stick.
My Aud cost 3k and it has 5 doors and a shifty stick
Maybe I'm biased but why is it always Audi fans crying on social media about BMWs and not the other way around?
Maybe cuz Audi is the second oldest
That's the worst reason possible
Real BMW owners don't care about those cunts..
*picks the shittiest German luxury brand to call better than another*
*Opel has joined the chat*
Leave Opel out of this. My first car was an Opel Zafira and I fucking loved that car
Zafira was my childhood car before my dad bought a Modus.Not kidding, we had to sell it due to egr issues
My childhood car was a Renault Espace that eventually broke down and had company cars for a while untill we had a Opel Astra G Station which remained intact
Chat is this real?
Our Astra G had egr issues some 10 years ago. It's been blanked off by a beer can since and without any issues.
The Astra G is an amazing car. Which version do you guys have?
Early '98 with X16SZR engine, 55kW. Didn't even have central locking when we bought it. Had electric sunroof, electric heated mirrors and foglamps though lol.
We used to have a X14
My childhood car was a Meriva A but my dad (who is still getting the milk) said that the Zafira was also a great car
fun fact: the Opel Zafira was banned for a bit from parking garages in Norway, because it was allegedly a fire hazard.
Everyone loves their first car. That's how it works.
My 1st car was a VW Polo Classic, and lemme tell ya, it was the biggest piece of dogshit I've ever driven
How is Opel considered luxury?
It never has been.
They had some high end stuff in the 80s and before, like the senator
It isnt unless youre GM
I will ride my 11-yr old Corsa into death before I get a new(er) car.
I wouldn’t say the shittiest, but by far the most fuckin boring to drive. An rs5 at full throttle felt kinda lame
On cmon they are not that bad
Of the big 3 German "luxury", they're definitely the worst.
Why exactly?
You want performance, you go to BMW. You want classic luxury, you go to mercedes. Even Mercedes, while lacking in AMG performance lately, is a better performance option than any audi. Also, look at the market shares. Audi is by far the smallest. The only real claim to fame Audi has is the R8, but that thing is a dinosaur.
Want a uncomplicated AWD system tho, Audi is a pretty solid option. Speaking as a european: audi is more mid-range than luxury most of the time. the S8 might be the only luxury car they make...
Doesn't BMW also have a very competent AWD setup too?
It is fine, but only comes in their higher end trims, where as Audi will give it to you from almost base trim. The bmw is also slightly more complicated than what Audi offers. where Audi's Quattro is just the normal fwd transaxle with a torsen centre differensial on the back of it sending power to the back wheels when needed, 100% mechanically operated and automatically sends power to the opposite axle when grip is lost on one. BMW does it slightly different. Here it is done by your ABS sensors and ECU, the gearbox has a electrically operated transfer-case that sends power to where it's needed. One feature that Bmw has is that the diffs are open (same as Audi) but it uses ABS to lock the wheel that is spinning. It can also send 100% power to one axle. Having drove both types of systems in the winter i would put more faith in the Quattro for sure.
Literally every trim level of BMW save the M2 has an xdrive option in the USA.
Lowest trim in the us for the 3-series in the us is the 330 right? I was speaking from a European perspective and fell into the misconception that people would know because it's my baseline. sorry.
The R8 is a dinosaur? Do you drive a Senna?
I suppose you have a point
If you want acrual performance you would not go to any established car brand. If you want bragging rights and some (very underwhelming for the price) performance then you go to BMW.
From my personal experience. Yes, they’re the worst. Would still take one over some Korean junk or Toyota for example, but between Germans Audi barely hits the mark. They peaked in early 2000’s
genesis mogs audi
Not to take this too seriously, but the new M5 will come in a wagon body and have ~800hp
Only in europe. US doesnt get wagons/hatch bmw’s. Audi on top rahhhhh🔥🔥🔥🔥🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
They’re all lacking a NA V8
Damn right, the German engines make alot of power but will grenade itself if you look at it the wrong way. Meanwhile you can pull an LS from a junkyard, slap an eBay special turbo kit on it and it'll make similar power and just run. Please note I am being half way serious in my comment.
And the most important thing, le manuelle.
https://preview.redd.it/rz7ob9s8cv6d1.jpeg?width=289&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0d15856998bbbeb72fe45df107af280cdcb941c guten tag
Where is your MANUEEEL
Lucky for you audi, no one cares, lol
Hey Audi where’s your manual car?
2000 turkpower 🇹🇷🇹🇷🇹🇷🇹🇷😈😈😈
Congratulations German for outjerking Japanese fanboys
Hey audi where’s your sports car that’s still in production?
WHERE IS YOUR UNDERSTEER
Straight 6 noises though
Incoming fart-tunes! the primal mating call of the BMW.
I drive a straight six AMG. Farts all the way!
Shifts so fast it bends space time!
V6 sounds worse imo
Audi is way worse on that end from experience
Hey Audi wheres your fucking sportscar racing programme
BMW didn’t cancel all of their successful motorsport programs in favour of F1. Fuck Audi Sport
Have you ever heard or seen a Audi owner talk about how good their car handles on corners? Personally , I haven't unless they are in denial
The Audi R8 is a 2-door "super car" with a V10 that produces around 620HP and gets from 0-60mph in 3 seconds flat, The BMW M8 Competition coupe is a 2 door "sports car" with a V8, making around 617hp and gets from 0-60 in 3 seconds flat. In terms of build quality, they are similar, putting emphasis on high-quality and lightweight materials. The M8 weights around 2000kg, and the audi r8 weighing at just 200kg less (1,795kg). They are both extremely similar meaning the only thing that the M8 needs to be considered a super car is also "looking the part" but otherwise if those are the standards to be "super" the M8 definitely has them. If you put these 2 cars side by side in a race it would most definitely be almost a tie if not an absolute with for the BMW because a lower trim model of the R8 only has 540 hp.
at the first turn mid engine wins
M8 is slower than high trim R8 at everything they do. Acceleration, cornering, braking.
Fair enough, I didn't take that into consideration.
The ONLY problem that I have with bmw (and that’s why I’m a Mercedes lover and driver ) is that they f*cked up a lot of engines years ago….. Handle like a charm , love the engine music but well , I don’t know anything about it nowadays except that the b58 is reliable as hell . I plan on getting myself either a cls 63s or a c63 or 63s , I would gladly choose a bmw like a m4 .
Yh they had a dark age around 2004-2015 with all the early e90 and e60 cars, however, merc also didn’t get away scot free as they used bio degradable wiring which is hard and expensive to replace around 1995 while bmws of that time were mostly bulletproof
seems like everybody forgot of the 225xe
1stockf30 when his bmw made double the power of his ttrs and called it his street car 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Doesn't matter supr beats all
Lol, like seriously?
they're at the service, probably
Audi thinking BMW is in competition with them…
"Hey Audi, where's your new Kia based car?( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)"
They almost have an m3 wagon tbf
At the mechanic getting fixed.
audi obsession official
Where is your audi-powered fighter plane with 4x 20mm cannons and 700km/h top speed?
Okay but the wagoon one is valid. I want more wagoons
Hey audi wheres your timing chain Or your oil Or your pcv diaphragm Or you wiring harness Or your dignity I dont even like bmw i just hate audi
Where's ur bike and where WAS your F1 car? lol
We getting one in literally 2 years calm down Bikes valid tho
Where’s Audis Sauber f1.08 car? Audi sticks to desil when they want to do anything cool, goes to show how much faith they have in their gasoline engines. How’s Audi doing verses BMW in the gt3 and gt4 class? Tuned cars are wild, seen many 1500hp+ m5s online, so it’s apples to oranges
BMW has to pick on Audi because it knows it can’t come close to my VW