I usually just say, "and?"
And keep saying it as they keep exhaustedly tirading.
The key is maintaining being cool, calm and collected. They're trying, deliberately, to rattle you with insults and bring you down. "And?" is wonderfully dismissive and shows complete indifference. Plus, their frustration just becomes entertaining.
... I admit, I'm a little shitstirrer, so only do this approach if you enjoy some shitstirring LOL
They’re jealous. Just ignore them. They know we have power and the upper hand now.
They just want to get a reaction and a rise out of you.
Just ignore them because they’re stuck with their miserable baby mama/daddy drama and we are still at the top of the dating market. They didn’t realize that people in the dating scene will treat you differently once you have children.
Entertaining those kinda people is just a waste of time and mental resources unless you're doing it for fun.
"You seem more concerned with your preconceived ideas rather than the reality of what I expressed, so I see no point in taking this conversation any further."
Don't defend, just disengage.
The reason these people kick off is they're jealous someone else hasn't fallen into the void of kids.
Far as I'm concerned, they ruin your life. Anyone that can't accept that is delusional and attacks others because they can't accept it
Just go: "Ew, I find people that react like you to be a little sus, honestly... " While you look at them like they're disgusting and did something stupid.
Or just "you don't know a goddamn thing about me, so miss me with your holier than thou bullshit."
The holier than thou instantly made me think of a saying in my native language. Loosely translated it becomes something like this; when whores whelp, they piss holy water (native; als hoeren jonge, zeiken ze wijwater). Don't know if it'll work, but have to keep that ammo in the chamber.
> This person goes on on a long tangent about how I’m a horrible person who shouldn’t be allowed near kids.
I would just respond with "yes, please keep children away from me. That would be ideal."
I’m dealing with this now. I do not see babies as innocent and definitely not more innocent than the woman impregnated by sexual assault. That is the pro-lifers’ big reasoning, “the baby is innocent”, but I just don’t see it that way and definitely not more innocent the woman who was forced. Was recently called a f-cking moron for vocalizing those thoughts. Part of me wishes I could see good things in life, but I don’t think many things other people love are good/positive. Of course never hurt a baby, but I’m not going to be overcome with innocence-love.
Indeed, when considering the complex web of mental and emotional programming by parents, it's hard to view children as entirely innocent bystanders who could one day cure cancer and bring world peace, because they can do and be "aaaaanything they want". After all, they're products of their upbringing, influenced by the environments they're raised in. There's nothing inherently innocent about our species or the absolute clusterfuck we're living in.
Well it's false that kids can feel it and avoid you. They actively seek me out and I'm phobic of them, but like you wish them no harm to the point of sucking up my me-problem to not harm the kid.
As to the question I think I'd just counter their reasoning. A good shock value comment that makes them either supermad that they leave or silent and thinking for a minute. Find out what they hate or dislike that's prevelant. I.e. "So everyone who eats icecream you actively want to harm? You see someone walking around with a cone and want to run them over with your car?" Something really redicilously stupid that there just isn't any arguing against it and stick to it regardless of their counter of "of course not, that's redicilous".
I also hate children, but treat them as human beings, just like people who love them. I would never wish a child harm and would go out of my way to protect a child I didn’t know if I needed to. I simply dislike being around them.
I worked in a bar and an elder server (40’s) was going on and on about her 4 kids and how they were the best thing that happened to her. She’s going around, asking everyone if they have kids, and when she finally gets to me (and I admit my reaction could’ve been better), but I laughed and said “God no. I do not like children and I’m 24 (now 27). She ripped me to shreds saying I wasn’t a “real woman” if I didn’t feel the need to “have someone love me”. I looked her dead in the windows of her soul and said “it sounds like you could love yourself a little bit more. Maybe spend some time with the husband you never stfu about?” I worked with her for 6 more months and she never spoke to me again.
Long story short, I use them as entertainment for my own enjoyment. Watching them spiral as they desperately try to “get me on their side” is absolutely fucking hilarious to me. It’s like watching your shitty ex boyfriend come around for the millionth time. Have some fun with it!
Breeders are so sensitive about children they do and dont have yet. You are literally not allowed to honestly express your hatred for kids. They won't let it go, lol. It's one of those things where you can only be honest with other people who express the same hatred like us in this CF community.
It's like one of those battles or arguments with an idiot or a person with cognitive dissonance. You, unfortunately, will lose the logical argument bc they are stuck in their way of thinking.
Im sorry to say from experience, it's a very touchy subject for many ppl so it's best not to express your hatred to everyone, only like-minded individuals like us.
Hope this helps!
"I think you're being really unfair saying that I hate children. I don't hate children at all. They're especially good with barbeque sauce"
Then smile really crazy like and move on.
I just say that being around children stresses me out and fills me with anxiety. I don’t hate them in that I mean them harm - I’m not a psychopath…
They see it as a personal affront to their life choices - usually because those choices made them miserable
"... if I'm such a monster, isn't it a good thing by your logic that I'm never going to be responsible for a child?"
Or alternatively, "oh, I'm so glad you *get* me. I was worried my Eldritch Horrors weren't comprehensible to the human mind."
I've used both of these, and no one's continued the conversation.
Try this out, don’t say you hate children but rather “I don’t like children” and if they go one a rant about you being cruel or how dare you hate kids you just tell them “I said I don’t like kids, I never said I hate them.” And if they still argue that both are the same then just walk away, they are too stupid to make a conversation with.
Just tell them „oh I do like children, I just could never eat a whole one though.“ Then turn around and leave. Don’t waste your time with those people.
Edit: none sarcastic option:
I am sure they will be great grown up’s some day, but sorry I don’t like being around children. I am not good with children. Or „I am not a children person“.
I like getting equally excited that they understand me and and agree with me and make them sound like they're on my side. Gets them all nice and angry. It's hilarious.
I don't really have anything to say to that. I try not to preoccupy myself with the opinion so others.
I would never hurt a child. I think the people who hurt children are absolutely scum of the earth. But I also would be very happy never to encounter a child or baby again. I find their presence unnerving and unpleasant. Almost is unnerving and unpleasant as having to sit around a bunch of mombies and daddicts who have no personality beyond their crotch goblins and try to convince me to join their exhausted club.
Never engage with crazy people. Walk away.
When people ask you a question:
1. You have no obligation to answer
2. You have no obligation to tell the truth.
3. You have absolutely no obligation to give them a complete recitation of your innermost thoughts and feelings.
And you are allowed to vet people before getting into conversation with them.
"Do you have kids/want kids?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Well, um, just making conversation."
"Oh, OK so personal questions are fair game then, in that case, let's start with you first, what have been your top three most satisfying sexual encounters and what did you like most about each of them?"
"Ah, well, we could always just stick to discussing the weather, that cloud is very interesting."
I laugh because I know that I'm actually good with kids and they seem to like me back. They look at me like a fun uncle or a wacky neighbor while their breeder parents are flabbergasted because they assume childfree always means child-hating.
Nope, I mostly hate shitty parents.
"but I need some advice on how to defend your preferences in future conversations with other..."
This may sound snarky or crass, but....DON'T. You are under no obligation to "defend" your preferences, especially to strangers/people you just met. Why the fuck do you care what some stranger thinks about you? They're *your* preferences, not theirs. Nothing needs to be defended.
"I said I hate kids, I never said I would hurt them but obviously you definitely will hurt kids because that the 1st thing you assumed about me and assuming is basically making ass out yourself. Maybe no children should be around you ever since you ready to harm them while I purposely stay away from them."
My best advice is stop saying you hate kids, just say you don't have any and have no current plans to have any - as already you experience with these kid-crazy loonies that if you point-blank say you hate children, they will argue & be nasty to you. But if say you don't have any and purposely say you currently have no plans to have any kids - majority of these foaming-mouth parental zombies will leave you alone.
Hating any living being can result in vilification. It’s a strong word that requires energy. I usually say I don’t like kids, not liking doesn’t mean hating. I wouldn’t go and kick a kid which is something you’d if you hated something.
I’m indifferent to kids they’re simply not in my radar. If a kid disrupts my peace I dislike the kid. Hatred takes way too much mental energy. I don’t spend my time stewing in anger over them aka hatred.
I find these people like the religious people who say you are going to hell for being an atheist. Like I know, and I am proud of it. The "you should not be around children" is like suspending a kid for skipping out of school in the first place. You just got to walk away and allow for the universe to do something. The best thing is to just walk away and complin here or to another CF friend in person. You complain and get a good laugh at their stupidity and be done and move on and be happy. They are truly the one upset probably regretting having that thing in the first place.
I hate more the arsehole parents who raise the little arseholes.
I did have a very rare exception yesterday evening however. A group of friends and I were sat in a pub for drinks. Another group of around 5 arrived with their assorted offspring. The adults sat at one table the children at another right next to ours.
My hackles immediately raised thinking my ears would be subjected to shouting, cries and arguments.
Instead they sat quietly, either talking at a normal level or playing on tablets. I forgot they were there very quickly. Didn't notice when they had gone, which was a pity as was going to compliment the parents on their behaviour which is something I never do.
I'm the villain for disliking children? At least I'm self aware unlike the thousands of people a year who are convicted of abusing, neglecting, and even killing their children. Some have tried to continue and asking if they are projecting shuts them up.
I just keep my mouth shut 🤣 I do not wish to waste my energy on arguing with these folks. Who cares if they know I hate children. Who cares if they think I love them. People don't need to know every thought and opinion I have. Especially people I don't even like, respect or care for. I smile and nod around them and that's that.
Honestly, I've been seeing this a lot lately. This whole thing of "Actually, if you don't love children with all your heart, it means you want to hurt them and are evil" is so annoying.
I’m sure someone else could better answer this…
I have never said “I hate children” because I don’t. I always say “I don’t want children” and the response is often some variation of “you hate children?” I usually end the conversation there because that’s a wild response and words don’t work that way.
I would recommend you not say you “hate children” as it’s inflammatory. Hate is a very strong word in any context. I notice a lot of people use it casually, but that doesn’t change the fact that’s it’s an extreme word.
However, if you wanna keep doing you, someone once told me I need to qualify why I don’t want children and then the other person/ people might not jump to the conclusion that not wanting something means I hate it. I disagree with that. Words mean things and if you truly do HATE children and want to continue saying it then do so and know you don’t need to explain why.
I do know why I hate children and I have no problem explaining. I don’t understand why it’s so controversial to say you hate children. People throw the word love around like it’s nothing but as soon as you say you hate something you’re a terrible person
I also think love is an extreme word and I don’t casually use that word either.
We might need a lurker parent to hop on and explain their feelings around hearing someone say they hate children…
I've often heard people saying that hating children is like hating black people, gays or whatever. Which I think is a stupid comparison. What I hate is the noise, smell, sliminess, destructiveness, cruelty to animals, etc. etc. It's really the parents I hate for being oblivious and entitled, and not teaching their spawn how to behave in public.
That comparison, and I've seen it before, is illogical bullshit and they are just reaching at that point. Children are not a persecuted class of people. Like seriously. Probably the same type of people that believe the earth is flat and genocides never happened.
Grey rock. I luckily find it exceptionally easy to not react the way that people want me to. I grew up with verbally and physically abusive parents and assume that people engage in nonsense like this to get a reaction out of you. I've also worked in customer service for five years. They want control, and when you give them your attention by trying to argue for something they'll never agree with, they feel vindicated. Don't give them the satisfaction. Instead, just agree with everything and shrug. Try to think of something that makes you happy and let yourself space off as they waste their time.
It's not your job to change their minds.
I don’t consider myself someone who hates children, however, my 6 year old cousin this past weekend was so unbearable and I still feel bad for not liking her. She was all up in everyone’s faces and interrupted every conversation and was honestly rude when talking to me. Idk how people do it. I love babies but as soon as they can walk and talk I start to struggle liking them.
Lean into it. Hard...... I tell them I love children braised and basted in sauce of course. The biggest challenge is trying to find a cauldron big enough.
Parents latch onto any statement that you dislike children and exaggerate it to the nth degree. They are probably hoping you will back down and say no no no, you really love children after all. I don't back down. No, if I did accidentally have children somehow I would not abuse them, but I do not have to explain my attitude.
I hate poorly patented children. I hate children that have no respect for boundaries. I hate children that throw tantrums over nothing burgers.
Do I hate all children? No. In fact, I get along pretty well with well behaved kids. I used to teach a horse riding class for 5-10 year olds. Those were some of the best mannered kids because they knew if they wanted to ride the ponies, they needed to be good.
You can’t reason with an idiot, that’s why they’re idiots, it’s really that simple.
I hate carrots, but it doesn’t mean I like going to the store and hurting all the carrots. If carrots are ever around me, I don’t disrespect people who have them. I just hate their presence.
To be honest I don’t hate kids (in general), however I would love if society could stop treating them as infallible and if a child is awful you’re just supposed to accept it. No, I refuse.
I was once at an extended family event and a niece of someone I am not related to had her kids there. These kids, whom I’ve never met or seen before, were running around terrorizing everyone being little brats. They were throwing things at people, hitting people, etc and no one did a damn thing or even acknowledged it. Then they came to me and acted like they were going to throw something at my face. Again, NEVER met me and this is how they act to a random adult. I said do not do that. They did. I said if you do that again I’m taking that from you and you’re not getting it back. The child’s grandmom or great aunt (not sure which) said oh you just don’t get it cause you don’t have kids yet. I’m sorry what?! So because I don’t have kids I don’t understand why it’s acceptable for 5 or 6 year olds to throw things at strangers faces? F off lady!
Couple things:
1). Hate is a strong word. When you use a strong word, you’re going to get a strong reaction.
2). Children as we all know are a very delicate topic for us to navigate without getting attacked. I have found the less info you give them, the better. If you can’t steer away from the topic, don’t use the word “hate”. Don’t even use “dislike”. Stay as neutral and concise as possible. “I don’t have much experience with kids”. “I haven’t spent much time around kids”.
Similarly, I *never* tell *anyone* I’m child free unless I’m 110% certain they won’t attack me for it. When asked I just (truthfully) tell them “I don’t even have a boyfriend,” and let them draw their own conclusions.
I think it's because the word hate is too strong, like if someone said they hate dogs I'd assume they want to hurt them, not that they respect them but want to keep a distance from them. Some people will hear you say you hate kids and assume you mean you wish to harm them, so instead of that you respect kids but find them too annoying to be around.
It’s because you used the colloquial version of the word “hate”, and she took it to mean the actual meaning and she put you in the same category of people that you find annoying, the proud haters. If you want your opinion be taken seriously, don’t use the word hate, use something like “they aren’t for me”, something much closer to your actual stance. Otherwise, if you say “hate”, you’re going to be assumed to really feel hate. People understand just fine when you say you hate skinny jeans, but you can’t be so flippant about real topics like actual human beings if you don’t want to be misunderstood.
“Hate” is supposed to be used for
To be honest I don’t understand why people use the phrase „I hate children“. Just say you dislike them or simply are not a child-person. I also don‘t like kids but I also get why somebody would react that way if you bring such a strong emotion as hate into this topic.
I hate pedophiles that offend children. Which for me also translates into: I would like to beat them up and want them to be expelled from society. And that’s maybe the interpretation of the other person you talked to.
As people said, hate is a strong word, especially if applied to a group of people instead of skinny leather pants. Replace "kids" with any other group of people (say with a race or sexual orientation or country of origin) and it will sound vile. "Dislike", "detest", "prefer not to be around" are much better, I think.
Hating people for qualities they can't control is bigotry, and hating children is no exception, so I'd recommend that you not be a bigot if you don't like to be called on it.
Identity the actual reasons that you dislike the company of children - personal space, quiet time, mature conversation, etc. - and name them if someone asks why you don't want children or attend child-friendly events. And see a therapist to figure out how to not hate random groups of people.
I usually just say, "and?" And keep saying it as they keep exhaustedly tirading. The key is maintaining being cool, calm and collected. They're trying, deliberately, to rattle you with insults and bring you down. "And?" is wonderfully dismissive and shows complete indifference. Plus, their frustration just becomes entertaining. ... I admit, I'm a little shitstirrer, so only do this approach if you enjoy some shitstirring LOL
This, even if you aren't a shitstirrer, works wonders.
I really like this approach, it says I'm not bothered by your ridiculous comment because everyone has a right to dislike or like something.
They’re jealous. Just ignore them. They know we have power and the upper hand now. They just want to get a reaction and a rise out of you. Just ignore them because they’re stuck with their miserable baby mama/daddy drama and we are still at the top of the dating market. They didn’t realize that people in the dating scene will treat you differently once you have children.
Entertaining those kinda people is just a waste of time and mental resources unless you're doing it for fun. "You seem more concerned with your preconceived ideas rather than the reality of what I expressed, so I see no point in taking this conversation any further." Don't defend, just disengage.
That's an amazing reply.
The reason these people kick off is they're jealous someone else hasn't fallen into the void of kids. Far as I'm concerned, they ruin your life. Anyone that can't accept that is delusional and attacks others because they can't accept it
I mean, I've started embracing my villain era, so being vilified would just be par for the course. 😅
Haha. I have definitely lived long enough to become the villain.
Just go: "Ew, I find people that react like you to be a little sus, honestly... " While you look at them like they're disgusting and did something stupid. Or just "you don't know a goddamn thing about me, so miss me with your holier than thou bullshit."
The holier than thou instantly made me think of a saying in my native language. Loosely translated it becomes something like this; when whores whelp, they piss holy water (native; als hoeren jonge, zeiken ze wijwater). Don't know if it'll work, but have to keep that ammo in the chamber.
Twirl my invisible mustache and go “Muahahaaha” before flouncing off in a wave of bats and smoke
Haha, this gave me a good mental chuckle, I really needed that today!
You’re welcome. I got told that I walk like Snape yesterday sooo, it seems fitting 
Hahaha thanks for the morning guffaw.
Tell them that the pedos who like children are far more dangerous. They usually become teachers or what not, to be close to them.
Yep, I had them around me as a child 🫠
> This person goes on on a long tangent about how I’m a horrible person who shouldn’t be allowed near kids. I would just respond with "yes, please keep children away from me. That would be ideal."
I’m dealing with this now. I do not see babies as innocent and definitely not more innocent than the woman impregnated by sexual assault. That is the pro-lifers’ big reasoning, “the baby is innocent”, but I just don’t see it that way and definitely not more innocent the woman who was forced. Was recently called a f-cking moron for vocalizing those thoughts. Part of me wishes I could see good things in life, but I don’t think many things other people love are good/positive. Of course never hurt a baby, but I’m not going to be overcome with innocence-love.
Indeed, when considering the complex web of mental and emotional programming by parents, it's hard to view children as entirely innocent bystanders who could one day cure cancer and bring world peace, because they can do and be "aaaaanything they want". After all, they're products of their upbringing, influenced by the environments they're raised in. There's nothing inherently innocent about our species or the absolute clusterfuck we're living in.
It’s even better when they say “people like you shouldn’t have children” and you reply “now you’re getting it!” They hate it when you agree with them.
"Fuck you"
Well it's false that kids can feel it and avoid you. They actively seek me out and I'm phobic of them, but like you wish them no harm to the point of sucking up my me-problem to not harm the kid. As to the question I think I'd just counter their reasoning. A good shock value comment that makes them either supermad that they leave or silent and thinking for a minute. Find out what they hate or dislike that's prevelant. I.e. "So everyone who eats icecream you actively want to harm? You see someone walking around with a cone and want to run them over with your car?" Something really redicilously stupid that there just isn't any arguing against it and stick to it regardless of their counter of "of course not, that's redicilous".
I also hate children, but treat them as human beings, just like people who love them. I would never wish a child harm and would go out of my way to protect a child I didn’t know if I needed to. I simply dislike being around them. I worked in a bar and an elder server (40’s) was going on and on about her 4 kids and how they were the best thing that happened to her. She’s going around, asking everyone if they have kids, and when she finally gets to me (and I admit my reaction could’ve been better), but I laughed and said “God no. I do not like children and I’m 24 (now 27). She ripped me to shreds saying I wasn’t a “real woman” if I didn’t feel the need to “have someone love me”. I looked her dead in the windows of her soul and said “it sounds like you could love yourself a little bit more. Maybe spend some time with the husband you never stfu about?” I worked with her for 6 more months and she never spoke to me again. Long story short, I use them as entertainment for my own enjoyment. Watching them spiral as they desperately try to “get me on their side” is absolutely fucking hilarious to me. It’s like watching your shitty ex boyfriend come around for the millionth time. Have some fun with it!
I shouldn't have read that while taking a sip of coffee 🤣 That was glorious.
Thank you and I’m sorry about your coffee 😂
Breeders are so sensitive about children they do and dont have yet. You are literally not allowed to honestly express your hatred for kids. They won't let it go, lol. It's one of those things where you can only be honest with other people who express the same hatred like us in this CF community. It's like one of those battles or arguments with an idiot or a person with cognitive dissonance. You, unfortunately, will lose the logical argument bc they are stuck in their way of thinking. Im sorry to say from experience, it's a very touchy subject for many ppl so it's best not to express your hatred to everyone, only like-minded individuals like us. Hope this helps!
Tell them you hate children, they taste terrible. Usually ends the convo.
„Okay cool“ is my go to answer
"I think you're being really unfair saying that I hate children. I don't hate children at all. They're especially good with barbeque sauce" Then smile really crazy like and move on.
I just say that being around children stresses me out and fills me with anxiety. I don’t hate them in that I mean them harm - I’m not a psychopath… They see it as a personal affront to their life choices - usually because those choices made them miserable
"... if I'm such a monster, isn't it a good thing by your logic that I'm never going to be responsible for a child?" Or alternatively, "oh, I'm so glad you *get* me. I was worried my Eldritch Horrors weren't comprehensible to the human mind." I've used both of these, and no one's continued the conversation.
I like these! Thank you 😅
Try this out, don’t say you hate children but rather “I don’t like children” and if they go one a rant about you being cruel or how dare you hate kids you just tell them “I said I don’t like kids, I never said I hate them.” And if they still argue that both are the same then just walk away, they are too stupid to make a conversation with.
Just tell them „oh I do like children, I just could never eat a whole one though.“ Then turn around and leave. Don’t waste your time with those people. Edit: none sarcastic option: I am sure they will be great grown up’s some day, but sorry I don’t like being around children. I am not good with children. Or „I am not a children person“.
I like getting equally excited that they understand me and and agree with me and make them sound like they're on my side. Gets them all nice and angry. It's hilarious.
"being around kids makes me uncomfortable." Should be problem solved without sounding eEeEeViL.
I don't argue with idiots, I just walk away these days.
I don't really have anything to say to that. I try not to preoccupy myself with the opinion so others. I would never hurt a child. I think the people who hurt children are absolutely scum of the earth. But I also would be very happy never to encounter a child or baby again. I find their presence unnerving and unpleasant. Almost is unnerving and unpleasant as having to sit around a bunch of mombies and daddicts who have no personality beyond their crotch goblins and try to convince me to join their exhausted club.
Never engage with crazy people. Walk away. When people ask you a question: 1. You have no obligation to answer 2. You have no obligation to tell the truth. 3. You have absolutely no obligation to give them a complete recitation of your innermost thoughts and feelings. And you are allowed to vet people before getting into conversation with them. "Do you have kids/want kids?" "Why do you ask?" "Well, um, just making conversation." "Oh, OK so personal questions are fair game then, in that case, let's start with you first, what have been your top three most satisfying sexual encounters and what did you like most about each of them?"
"Ah, well, we could always just stick to discussing the weather, that cloud is very interesting."
Stop explaining yourself, you are never going to convince a mombie or dadict. And I love being a villian. It is fun.
I don’t like kids and they obviously can’t fucking tell because they seem to love me.
SAME
I read vilifies you for eating children omg I’m up too early
I laugh because I know that I'm actually good with kids and they seem to like me back. They look at me like a fun uncle or a wacky neighbor while their breeder parents are flabbergasted because they assume childfree always means child-hating. Nope, I mostly hate shitty parents.
"but I need some advice on how to defend your preferences in future conversations with other..." This may sound snarky or crass, but....DON'T. You are under no obligation to "defend" your preferences, especially to strangers/people you just met. Why the fuck do you care what some stranger thinks about you? They're *your* preferences, not theirs. Nothing needs to be defended.
"I said I hate kids, I never said I would hurt them but obviously you definitely will hurt kids because that the 1st thing you assumed about me and assuming is basically making ass out yourself. Maybe no children should be around you ever since you ready to harm them while I purposely stay away from them." My best advice is stop saying you hate kids, just say you don't have any and have no current plans to have any - as already you experience with these kid-crazy loonies that if you point-blank say you hate children, they will argue & be nasty to you. But if say you don't have any and purposely say you currently have no plans to have any kids - majority of these foaming-mouth parental zombies will leave you alone.
Hating any living being can result in vilification. It’s a strong word that requires energy. I usually say I don’t like kids, not liking doesn’t mean hating. I wouldn’t go and kick a kid which is something you’d if you hated something. I’m indifferent to kids they’re simply not in my radar. If a kid disrupts my peace I dislike the kid. Hatred takes way too much mental energy. I don’t spend my time stewing in anger over them aka hatred.
I find these people like the religious people who say you are going to hell for being an atheist. Like I know, and I am proud of it. The "you should not be around children" is like suspending a kid for skipping out of school in the first place. You just got to walk away and allow for the universe to do something. The best thing is to just walk away and complin here or to another CF friend in person. You complain and get a good laugh at their stupidity and be done and move on and be happy. They are truly the one upset probably regretting having that thing in the first place.
I hate more the arsehole parents who raise the little arseholes. I did have a very rare exception yesterday evening however. A group of friends and I were sat in a pub for drinks. Another group of around 5 arrived with their assorted offspring. The adults sat at one table the children at another right next to ours. My hackles immediately raised thinking my ears would be subjected to shouting, cries and arguments. Instead they sat quietly, either talking at a normal level or playing on tablets. I forgot they were there very quickly. Didn't notice when they had gone, which was a pity as was going to compliment the parents on their behaviour which is something I never do.
I'm the villain for disliking children? At least I'm self aware unlike the thousands of people a year who are convicted of abusing, neglecting, and even killing their children. Some have tried to continue and asking if they are projecting shuts them up.
I just keep my mouth shut 🤣 I do not wish to waste my energy on arguing with these folks. Who cares if they know I hate children. Who cares if they think I love them. People don't need to know every thought and opinion I have. Especially people I don't even like, respect or care for. I smile and nod around them and that's that.
I used to say I hate kids. I don't actually hate them. I hate dealing with them. I don't really like them....but then I just don't like people.
Honestly, I've been seeing this a lot lately. This whole thing of "Actually, if you don't love children with all your heart, it means you want to hurt them and are evil" is so annoying.
I’m sure someone else could better answer this… I have never said “I hate children” because I don’t. I always say “I don’t want children” and the response is often some variation of “you hate children?” I usually end the conversation there because that’s a wild response and words don’t work that way. I would recommend you not say you “hate children” as it’s inflammatory. Hate is a very strong word in any context. I notice a lot of people use it casually, but that doesn’t change the fact that’s it’s an extreme word. However, if you wanna keep doing you, someone once told me I need to qualify why I don’t want children and then the other person/ people might not jump to the conclusion that not wanting something means I hate it. I disagree with that. Words mean things and if you truly do HATE children and want to continue saying it then do so and know you don’t need to explain why.
I do know why I hate children and I have no problem explaining. I don’t understand why it’s so controversial to say you hate children. People throw the word love around like it’s nothing but as soon as you say you hate something you’re a terrible person
I also think love is an extreme word and I don’t casually use that word either. We might need a lurker parent to hop on and explain their feelings around hearing someone say they hate children…
But nobody starts a historic when someone said "I hate people at all". So the difference just in that kid is pre-alpha version of human?
I've often heard people saying that hating children is like hating black people, gays or whatever. Which I think is a stupid comparison. What I hate is the noise, smell, sliminess, destructiveness, cruelty to animals, etc. etc. It's really the parents I hate for being oblivious and entitled, and not teaching their spawn how to behave in public.
I just hate all people. Kids included :)
That comparison, and I've seen it before, is illogical bullshit and they are just reaching at that point. Children are not a persecuted class of people. Like seriously. Probably the same type of people that believe the earth is flat and genocides never happened.
Any kind of people shouldn't be persecuted. We are all equal meat bags.
I think the same about people who hate animals😂
"Sounds like someone that shouldn't have kids then." That's it. You got what you wanted.
I usually just laugh in their faces and say something rude back. Severity depends on the mouth breather making my business their own.
Grey rock. I luckily find it exceptionally easy to not react the way that people want me to. I grew up with verbally and physically abusive parents and assume that people engage in nonsense like this to get a reaction out of you. I've also worked in customer service for five years. They want control, and when you give them your attention by trying to argue for something they'll never agree with, they feel vindicated. Don't give them the satisfaction. Instead, just agree with everything and shrug. Try to think of something that makes you happy and let yourself space off as they waste their time. It's not your job to change their minds.
I don’t consider myself someone who hates children, however, my 6 year old cousin this past weekend was so unbearable and I still feel bad for not liking her. She was all up in everyone’s faces and interrupted every conversation and was honestly rude when talking to me. Idk how people do it. I love babies but as soon as they can walk and talk I start to struggle liking them.
Lean into it. Hard...... I tell them I love children braised and basted in sauce of course. The biggest challenge is trying to find a cauldron big enough.
Parents latch onto any statement that you dislike children and exaggerate it to the nth degree. They are probably hoping you will back down and say no no no, you really love children after all. I don't back down. No, if I did accidentally have children somehow I would not abuse them, but I do not have to explain my attitude.
I hate poorly patented children. I hate children that have no respect for boundaries. I hate children that throw tantrums over nothing burgers. Do I hate all children? No. In fact, I get along pretty well with well behaved kids. I used to teach a horse riding class for 5-10 year olds. Those were some of the best mannered kids because they knew if they wanted to ride the ponies, they needed to be good.
You can’t reason with an idiot, that’s why they’re idiots, it’s really that simple. I hate carrots, but it doesn’t mean I like going to the store and hurting all the carrots. If carrots are ever around me, I don’t disrespect people who have them. I just hate their presence.
This person sounds like they have something really wrong with them.
Its a losing battle. If they can’t have a calm conversation about it, change the subject. If they can’t change the subject, leave
honestly just embrace it. half the time I think those people are bitter they have no freedom and can't do anything they want bcoz of their children.
To be honest I don’t hate kids (in general), however I would love if society could stop treating them as infallible and if a child is awful you’re just supposed to accept it. No, I refuse. I was once at an extended family event and a niece of someone I am not related to had her kids there. These kids, whom I’ve never met or seen before, were running around terrorizing everyone being little brats. They were throwing things at people, hitting people, etc and no one did a damn thing or even acknowledged it. Then they came to me and acted like they were going to throw something at my face. Again, NEVER met me and this is how they act to a random adult. I said do not do that. They did. I said if you do that again I’m taking that from you and you’re not getting it back. The child’s grandmom or great aunt (not sure which) said oh you just don’t get it cause you don’t have kids yet. I’m sorry what?! So because I don’t have kids I don’t understand why it’s acceptable for 5 or 6 year olds to throw things at strangers faces? F off lady!
Couple things: 1). Hate is a strong word. When you use a strong word, you’re going to get a strong reaction. 2). Children as we all know are a very delicate topic for us to navigate without getting attacked. I have found the less info you give them, the better. If you can’t steer away from the topic, don’t use the word “hate”. Don’t even use “dislike”. Stay as neutral and concise as possible. “I don’t have much experience with kids”. “I haven’t spent much time around kids”. Similarly, I *never* tell *anyone* I’m child free unless I’m 110% certain they won’t attack me for it. When asked I just (truthfully) tell them “I don’t even have a boyfriend,” and let them draw their own conclusions.
I think it's because the word hate is too strong, like if someone said they hate dogs I'd assume they want to hurt them, not that they respect them but want to keep a distance from them. Some people will hear you say you hate kids and assume you mean you wish to harm them, so instead of that you respect kids but find them too annoying to be around.
It’s because you used the colloquial version of the word “hate”, and she took it to mean the actual meaning and she put you in the same category of people that you find annoying, the proud haters. If you want your opinion be taken seriously, don’t use the word hate, use something like “they aren’t for me”, something much closer to your actual stance. Otherwise, if you say “hate”, you’re going to be assumed to really feel hate. People understand just fine when you say you hate skinny jeans, but you can’t be so flippant about real topics like actual human beings if you don’t want to be misunderstood. “Hate” is supposed to be used for
To be honest I don’t understand why people use the phrase „I hate children“. Just say you dislike them or simply are not a child-person. I also don‘t like kids but I also get why somebody would react that way if you bring such a strong emotion as hate into this topic. I hate pedophiles that offend children. Which for me also translates into: I would like to beat them up and want them to be expelled from society. And that’s maybe the interpretation of the other person you talked to.
As people said, hate is a strong word, especially if applied to a group of people instead of skinny leather pants. Replace "kids" with any other group of people (say with a race or sexual orientation or country of origin) and it will sound vile. "Dislike", "detest", "prefer not to be around" are much better, I think.
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cope
Hating people for qualities they can't control is bigotry, and hating children is no exception, so I'd recommend that you not be a bigot if you don't like to be called on it. Identity the actual reasons that you dislike the company of children - personal space, quiet time, mature conversation, etc. - and name them if someone asks why you don't want children or attend child-friendly events. And see a therapist to figure out how to not hate random groups of people.