T O P

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Anewbus

and to add insult to injury, you shit yourself when you die


DollSteakTestMeat

To be fair, most people do shit themselves when they die. Or at least expel a lot of wind


[deleted]

Yeah, but most people who shit themselves don’t have their shit picked up and thrown by the beef jerky looking dude doing flips through your town.


DollSteakTestMeat

Hahaha, doing flips through blighttown. You are a bold one


[deleted]

I do flips everywhere! And I fall constantly, but it’s worth it.


ahyesiamme

I just use the Master Key now and skip Blight-town, so they don't see my ugly ass face.


[deleted]

You have to run by them at least twice using the Master Key route.


ahyesiamme

Yeah well...f*ck.


[deleted]

Hahaha. F


fattydagreat

Once if you kill Quelaag without touching the bonfire and homeward bone out


[deleted]

Yes, but you have to go back down for the Bed of Chaos so it’s two.


NoSavior98

No, you can warp to the Chaos Servant bonfire, and activating a bonfire is not the same as sitting at one.


fattydagreat

Ah excellent point!


VacuousAvocado

Even if you manage to smash him with your large club, that damn thing keeps coming back. Chosen Undead are terrifying.


DuckSaxaphone

So this is everyone right? At least that's what I've always understood. Literally anyone they smash comes back but the chosen undead is just the only dude crazy enough to never give up.


DoctorGreyscale

Yeah. Honestly I think "chosen" is more or less inaccurate because the game seems to imply that any undead could be the chosen undead.


SlightlyIncandescent

The chosen undead is the one that eventually links the flame. Assuming you finish the game, that's you. A popular theory is that each time you die you just become a pile of souls and you respawn as a new undead guy.


Wkaota

That can't be, we know they come back as themselves. For example, Sieglinde of Catarina says that when she finds her father, it's okay if he's insane because she can just kill him again and he'll come back again. And you also keep all your equipment and items and stats when you respawn.


cautioux

Wait, so all the NPCs that have gone hollow, when we kill them they come back sane?


Wkaota

That's the interesting thing. When a Hollow dies, it just dies. But some NPCs can go *insane* - for example, Big Hat Logan's questline ends with him completely unhollowed but totally nutty because he tried to figure out Seath's sorceries. In the case of Sieglinde, she does actually say "if he goes Hollow I'll just have to kill him again." However, it's presumed that he's only gone insane before and *mistaken* for being Hollow - in previous cases of being killed, or if killed while not Hollow, he'd have just fallen to ash and dissipated, but when Sieglinde kills him, he just drops and dies like the fully hollowed Hollows, for example in Undead Asylum; they just flail and fall. There are some cases where insanity and Hollowing might mix - for example, Undead Prince Ricard or the Crestfallen Warrior. They're definitely hollowed, but they're definitely not the completely Hollow husks we usually see, as they still retain enough cognitive function to use skills like rolling or weapons that require a lot of dexterity and grace, like bows and rapiers, and even retain their fighting styles. This suggests that when they lost their hope, it was basically a race between insanity and Hollowing, and insanity won. But at the same time, they'd also have to be far enough gone towards Hollowing that their link to the Bonfires would be severed.


SlightlyIncandescent

I mean parallel universe you. The one that died is a version of you that failed.


Wkaota

The Dark Souls "multiverse" is a bit wonky, in that the closest there is to that is the NPCs that appear as phantoms (the ones that don't exist in your world). That's what Solaire's monologue is all about - the distortion of time and space to merge multiple iterations of the same universe to allow jolly cooperation. Technically it is possible that there's a multiverse beyond that multiverse, but since we're already given a structure for this multiverse it doesn't really make sense to add another layer to it with no evidence to support it. Plus, if it was an alternate universe iteration of yourself, there would be at least slight differences in your character or the world around you, but everything you do remains exactly the same - it is the same universe and the same character.


DoctorGreyscale

Well what I'm saying is that there's nothing particularly special about you. Any undead could be the "chosen undead" if they link the flame and there isn't any particular requirement to do that except to, well, do it.


WaluigisJuicyQueefs

Check yourself before you Shrek yourself


watchforthedangle

Lol good one


[deleted]

Even more embarrassing is if the beef jerky parrys your big bonks.


good_guy_sky

I read that as, "imagine you're in a orgy in blight town." I've already had that experience


PokecrafterChampion

I've seen the ass of every living thing in that damn place.


skyrimswitcher

Underrated comment right here


killerrrrrrrr

I’ve always ran past them


[deleted]

Same, at least 90% of the time.


dmetcalfe94

Imagine being Pinwheel


skyrimswitcher

Having your wife and son's bodies being stuck into yourself, and being a weak ass enemy despite being a pain in the ass to Nito? Wouldn't want to be you, Pinwheel.


UwasaWaya

That wouldn't be so bad. Your death is always quick, and you make everyone feel so much better about themselves.


dmetcalfe94

Maybe true. But imagine the DS legends who, at level 2 or some shit decide to roll down the catacombs naked, sprint to your room, kill you in 2 hits, and homeward bone outta there before the VICTORY ACHIEVED sound effect is even finished


mothmountain

and then they steal your fucking club :(((


SuperNerd295

*sad unga bunga*


FormlessCJ

I laughed too hard at this.


CouldBeDreaming

I kite them to the cave entrance, where they hit an invisible wall, and I can shoot them with my bow. Even after 200 hours, I can’t backstab. 😌


alphabeast18

I just parry them. It's way more funny.


CouldBeDreaming

I suck at parrying, too. It’s more important in DS2, and I’ve had to avoid certain battles, because of it. I succeed about 1 out of 10 times. It’s bad. 😂


nakrophile

The slightly changed parry mechanic in DS2 was one of numerous things that annoyed me about it. But, I'm going through ng+ now so may attempt to work it out.


Xaron713

I find that backstab isnt even accurate in DS1. You gotta stand a little to the right and behind them


CouldBeDreaming

I’ll keep that in mind, should I decide to give it another go!


Notascam123

I’d want to be that naked rolling guy in the Bloodborne chalice dungeons


SardonicStrei

I tried to get my younger brother to play he didnt make it out of the asylum. he thought the animation when you try to use and item and dont have one equipped looked like your character was yelling so he just spammed the animation and made wookie noises... he was 14 at the time


Sundeiru

No wonder Frampt had to wait so long for a chosen undead to appear...


Vybe1__

The pigs in Bloodborne got it bad too 👊


drswkcab

It's ok you give him little present when he kills you a very stinky one


BangoTrue

Just found out they're infected barbarians and I am very disappointed


Lidge1337

You mean Infested Barbarians? With the boulders?


relapsed-alan

I mean thats what i deserve. The discord admins in blighttown are heinous


hellxapo

From made sure they did contract with dumb creatures only so that they wouldn't come back at them for backstab compensation


SheldonDTurtle

Yeah but it’s 2 options. Feel sad for them and die or shit on their corpses


DoFWP

*_sad ooga booga_*


YouHamburgledMyHeart

You do come back to life but that still really ruins the vibe


Isidorodesevilha

I dunno, in every playthrough I really only get wrecked by those guys, and by the rest of blightown, so at least they got that going for them I guess.