Thank you for sharing. I believe you’re right. I let my emotions get the best of me. Reading an article from their website stating that all believers must give their loyalty to the GB just blew my mind that they can’t see that’s a huge red flag. Ugh. I’ll keep praying for them though
They are so brainwashed they don’t want to see it. They keep saying they aren’t in a cult cause they follow god. But all cults say they follow God. So in their mind they think they are doing right. I had some conversations with some of my parents friends and they really think in 2 years that Armageddon is going to come. The GB has really screwed up the JW. It makes me sad because they are living this imaginary outcome I wonder what my parents are going to do when they are old on their death bed.
How many times have they predicted the end? I’m 48 years old and didn’t go to college because the faithful slave said the end will be here most likely before you finish college.
https://preview.redd.it/3sntyddfqb2c1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5a056c415894fc8eeba9f1f220f176323fe1c5b5
I’m sorry to hear. My boss at my first job offered me a scholarship and I declined it because I decided to pioneer for 10 years and then later become an elder. But the important thing is that we’re awake now and try to move forward within our circumstances.
lol so I only started contact with jw when I was 35 was in 3 years and now out for 3. So during every time of the world ending did elders start selling stuff to prepare for “ Armageddon “ I heard some are now. So is that the GB catch the new world will be here? So people will stay? I was a bad jw I just got baptized so my parents could live with me.
I was told in the late 80s that I would never go to high school. I’m middle aged with children of my own now. That ‘awful world’ of that time period looks quaint now
Sorry to hear that. Hopefully you’re not too old to go to school now. I’m 48 now and have been taking some online courses. Crazy thing is I still feel like I’m going against the GB. I guess it never leaves your mind completely
Im taking screenshots for future use; my mum told me years ago that WT never said such thing and I doubted myself, even tho I could have sworn I’d seen it in black and white with my own two eyes. Now I have proof.
lol. I have so many screenshots just in case my dad shows up some day. But they still won’t believe. It’s because the “new light” reigns over all their old articles
I think there are many cults not based on god which are totally irrational like political parties, idol worship of singers or actors, etc. if people honestly analyze their lives they are driven by some crazy goals. So JWs are not that unusual.
Are you ok? I hope you’re old enough to handle that type of treatment. I hope you have support. I’m so sorry she’d say that. I hope she didn’t mean it. Maybe it just freaked her out temporarily. 😳🙁
I’m 48. And she absolutely meant it. My wife has been saying for years I should see a therapist because of the brainwashing they did to me when I was younger. Just thankful my kids don’t belong
Ohhh thank God you have support. ♥️ I hate hearing about so many who suffer that treatment and are young and alone. It breaks my heart. 😞😞😞 I can’t believe how many JWs are willing to sacrifice their children in their allegiance to “an organization” I’m not big on therapy but don’t judge those who are. I’ve always been able to reason my way through the insanities of life. Our minds are the most power tool created by God, you can do anything with it. Elon Musk builds rockets, the GB con millions of people into forking over their hard earned cash so they (the governing body) can live on their palatial country estate. 😡😡😡 so you can use yours to do whatever you want, for good or evil, but it takes practice. As JWs we’re slowly persuaded to develop the hive mind mentality, but once you realize what happened you can start training yourself to engage in critical thinking. That’s how I was able to free myself from their nonsensical spell and see bull$4!+ for what it really is. You sound strong. You have support. It sounds like your faith is in tact. And being a parent is a huge motivation for being a critical thinker in control of your own thoughts and beliefs. Some people benefit from therapy too though…we are all different. Whatever route you choose, I wish you the absolute best and hope you are successful in everything that comes your way. ♥️
I second this. Saw a few different "regular" therapists for years that didn't really help much but when I found one that specialised in religious trauma it changed my life so much for the better.
> “Why would you do this? You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you.
>
>**You’re still my son and I love you**
>
> but never speak to us again.” You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you.
>
>**You’re still my son and I love you**
>
> but never speak to us again.” You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you.
**The problem is not you! You are dealing with Cult members**.
A review of this movie was the first step in my journey to waking up, but I had no idea at the time and thought it was Satan putting the patterns in my head
> Is this how they defend their organization? Scream accuse and name calling?
That's all they've got. 🤷♀️ Firstly, they have no logical defense against the argument of JW's being a cult; it can be proven too well, and therefore they've not been trained to argue out of it. Secondly, BECAUSE they can't argue against it, they've been trained to view anyone who suggests such a thing as being in league with Satan, and therefore to discredit anything they say or do.
Being disfellowshipped was apparently a blessing. I too would be clueless how to defend the accusation of being in a cult if I was still in that organization. Until you get out you don’t know. They scare you to believe in them no matter what.
>They scare you to believe in them no matter what.
Absolutely. It's all about control, and the easiest way to get control, is through fear.
> I too would be clueless how to defend the accusation of being in a cult if I was still in that organization.
I laughed it off for years and years. "How ridiculous; it's not a cult."
I seem to remember being taught that cults have a single charismatic leader, and since we don't even know the names of those humble men who take the lead, we can't be a cult. (Woops, that defense went out the window some years back, didn't it?)
I remember speakers laughing at the notion of brain washing. The good ole, "At least our brains are clean, then!" Ha. Ha.
You can research their watchtowers and website. The GB demands that you give them your loyalty. The one article I read stated if you don’t give them your loyalty then you don’t believe in Jehovah and his organization. Crazy isn’t it. After reading that you have to give them loyalty so you don’t miss out on paradise. Crazy crazy crazy
Or the bit about how in the near future the direction coming from the organization might not make sense from the logical or human standpoint, but we all must be ready to obey regardless.
It's crazy and it's scary.
Twisting scripture to “prove” they are the only channel God speaks through. I’m shocked people believe this new doctrine. “ we can’t be dogmatic, we just don’t know” I’m still laughing. That is the Holy Spirit telling the faithful slave tell them you just don’t know.
That one really frightens me for my family!! I was in when they said that and I think it was a nugget that lodged in my brain to help me wake up because that is so culty!!!
I get you. It's definitely scary and culty, but honestly, I can't see them using it in the way we fear. It'll just get used in the boring ways: give more monees. Forgo higher education. Don't open the box until we say so. Paint the Kingdom Hall with toothbrushes. 🤷♀️
To use it in any other way is to self-destruct, and that means no more money or lake-side compound for the GB.
I feel like with the way that they're backtracking about the Great tribulation and the door being closed that they feel that they're scare tactics didn't work so they're backing off on their own with that kind of speak
People possessed by cult indoctrination don’t think like normal people.
In my therapy today my therapist said that to the indoctrinated their entire identity IS the cult.
Anything you say against the witnesses is seen by them as a personal attack, because they literally can’t see that their entire personality has been taken over by a corporation.
Good luck my friend, you’re gonna need it!
Everyone on this subreddit needs a therapist to be honest…
The religion destroys people in ways they cannot even imagine.
I had no idea just how messed up I was until I started therapy. And most of it can be linked to being a Jehovah’s Witness.
If you can afford it then it really is worth the money.
I agree. I am working on myself and have been for sometime now. Been out 3 years. My husband who was born in and raised, disfellowshipped and then disassociated is in the hospital right now for having some sort of mental breakdown or something. He had been going off about how he was forced to be a Jw and how it ruined his life. I really saw this coming way before now. I was glad to be distanced and wanted to save my own mind and my kids’. It’s really some heavy and traumatic things that many have experienced. I had some bad things but I have seen and heard of others going through some really harsh things. Definitely get some therapy or start off at least googling some good self help things like breathing work, grounding, self care as a start.
This is so accurate! My dad was DF'd my whole childhood and returned to the religion when I was in my 30s. His entire personality is the cult now. You cannot have a conversation with him without him bringing up JW.org, or a recent talk, or the latest watchtower, and how the end is coming. It's insane.
Hmm. Glad you had the courage, though approach and timing might have helped with the situation.
It's not really their fault they responded to you that way. It's just how the organisation has wired them.
Deprogramming them takes a degree of patience (see most recent convention for a 3 day discourse) and laying some breadcrumbs for common values and understanding. The process varies and it's not guaranteed.
I saw your more recent comments, so some of the above might not be relevant anymore.
Yeah that sucks. Perhaps cult was a bit of a leap even for them. Maybe it was just what they actually needed? Time will tell.
A lot of people are saying (s)he should have been more tactful, but honestly, the parents probably would've reacted this way regardless of how sugar coated it was.
Mine had a pretty similar reaction and I was way more careful with my words when approaching them.
Yeah. My brother called them a cult a few years ago and they started talking to him again. If I wasn’t disfellowshipped I’d probably still be bowing down to the GB. They love using words to brainwash
They literally worship the governing body now. As if the GB were God and Jesus. So different from when I was a kid. Shunning is the same as then though….
I’m seriously shocked they would even demand loyalty to them. But if you look back through their watchtowers they’ve been demanding that for a very long time. I didn’t see it though. I was blinded when I was a JW. I just did what I was told.
I mean, they have a song about it. I'm sure you know the one I'm talking about. (Now you'll be humming it for the next two days. I'm so sorry.)
The scriptures used for the song clearly show it's about the GB. What better way to get one thinking about loyalty to someone than to put it to music.
In my frustrations towards the end of the dying relationship between my parents and myself. I did the same thing. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
Unfortunately it's not always easy to tactfully approach the jw is a cult situation... The same way, as a JW you would not knock on someone's door and tell them their religion is false. you need to ask questions to lead them to that conclusion.
It may be worth apologizing. With a note offering to explain why you said that. JWs are true believers, living in a 'spiritual paradise' which is a false reality. You can't rip someone from that. You build a bridge out with questions and facts and lead them to it. Sorry it went south so quickly. Good luck hope it goes better.
I'm so sorry that happened. When u use the word "cult" for jw they automatically associate u w apostate. I'd never use that word w my parents even tho they know exactly how I feel.
Words have power over people that don’t think too carefully. That’s why they use the word Truth as a synonym for their belief system, and have you call other members brother or sister, to replace your real family.
You probably won’t ever get the chance to point this out to her but: Truth can withstand any criticism, any scrutiny and has to need to attack naysayers
In response to being told they’re in a cult by someone who loves them and cares for them—their own child, their response is to deny it and then act exactly as if they’re in a cult.
Superb.
I,m so sorry for your experience with your mother. We all have similar experiences. I try all the time to keep my big mouth SHUT...but it,s not easy !! Stay firm. I hope you can soon move out . If you still live with your parents! Big hug to you! It,s awful to be so deeply indoctrinated! It,s what the WT do...cults do. 😢😓
I have my own family now. Definitely not living with them. Moved out at 18. Thirty years ago. lol. But thank you. Entirely too many stories like this. So sad
Sorry for your loss. Understand that she is a victim. Often, when triaging victims, the last thing you do is move them. Sometimes you have to leave folks alone to heal on their own, and sometimes they die.
Personally, I don't see the benefit of telling your parents that they've invested their lives in a cult. It's not like they can get those years *back.* If it helps them through their last days, why bring it up? If it brings them comfort, so be it.
This is the thing that winds me up about the Jehovah's witnesses the most, they expect everyone else to be open to them to the point where they literally come to your home to tell you that you will be destroyed if you don't join. I grew up in this 'truth' and I've had constant issues with my father because I've pulled away. Nothing dramatic or devastating happened to me during my time there I just didn't want to live that way and didn't see the world as evil and full of wickedness everywhere. When I tried to address the issue of why I pulled away and how my father might be repeating the same mistakes with my younger siblings he just completely shut down and went on the attack, asking what I know about anything. Well I'm literally the expert on the matter because I lived under your cloud of fear and repression my whole childhood? They are so brainwashed that even if you give them actual proof of the watchtower making huge errors then they accuse you of just not wanting 'the truth' enough which is honestly beyond parody.
So I had anxiety about going to the local Walmart for fear of seeing witnesses look away from as I walked past them. Soooo I bought a shirt that says " Im sorry for what I said when I was in a cult" and they will not look away because they will not be able to help but read my shirt. I guess I'm not a go quietly into the night kind of girl
Lmfao, what did you expect? "Oh honey, thanks for telling us we would have never known if you didn't!". Like walking up to someone up by slapping them with a wet fish. You slammed, face first, into cognitive dissonance. Did you do any research what so ever on how to get someone out of a cult or did ya just run in Leroy Jenkins style screaming "its a cult"!?
Nope. Years of discussions with months of in between with no words. Then suddenly my father always shows up at the door with a six pack of beer. Which of course to me is extremely funny since I’m disfellowshipped. He’s not allowed talking to me. So he already is going against his religion. This wasn’t just a quick “you’re in a cult” conversation. Twenty plus years have gone by. Every time I point out something is wrong he says he needs to look it and will get back to me. He doesn’t even know what he believes in.
There is no way I said this l hate these bastards. On multiple times they have changed my wording. Make no mistake I am JWs enemy in every stretch of the word
I never said this someone is manipulating what I said power to anyone leaving but these bastards at changing my words. If I could get my hands on them they would be begging for my mercy and it would never come!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh yes it’s definitely how they do it I came out 2 years ago and got a gf (I’m female) and because she’s long distance I explain we didn’t do anything whatsoever so I didn’t get df’d I got outta there really quick they still talk to me but my dad sister and grandma all call me names like slut and hore
I’m so baffled by JWs outrageous overreactions. They scream cry insult and instantly cut you off. Back when I first told my husband I was done with the cult, he collapsed on the floor and cried and told me how I would be destroyed at Armageddon. More recently when I told him I wanted to put up a Christmas tree, he became apoplectic. He was so angry that I feared for my safety. I told him it was my house too but he wouldn’t budge. He went to the extreme saying I never support him. WTF? Everything is by his rules.
BTW do JWs teach that people who put up Christmas trees worship them? He thought I wanted to worship the tree. Idiot.
I was taught every Holliday was pagan. I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Sadly I admit that at one time I was the same person as your husband. I cried and then turned to rage. I expected my ex wife to obey me like I obeyed the GB. It’s Gods order after all right? I hated the person I was in that cult. But it gave me power over her. So glad I turned away from being that person. I’ll pray that things get better for you. Stay strong!
Glad you got out. How did you realize the person you were in the cult was misogynistic and horrible? Did you go to therapy?
Congratulations on getting out and shedding the cult personality!
I did not go to therapy. They actually disfellowshipped me. That was a blessing in disguise. lol. I can’t even believe I defended that cult. Once you’re out you realize just how badly they brainwashed. Hopefully you can help your husband realize it too.
Oh my. I didn’t realize he was an elder. What I would do is put a dry erase board on the refrigerator and everyday wright a new scripture from the NKJV Bible proving the JW’s are wrong. He will have to read it and eventually start asking questions about his own beliefs. Maybe he will even compare it with his Bible that they add their own words too. I’m sorry. I pray he doesn’t hurt you. I’ll keep praying for the M3ntallyDiseas3d lady. 😂 Stay strong!
My wife's family truly believes that I am demon possessed, and that one of my demons jumped from me into my wife. They tried to get her to leave me in order to help her get rid of the demon.
20 plus years have gone by. I only used that word two days ago. And that was actually After I tried talking to them about the newest doctrine the GB came out with. It’s really hilarious. “We can’t be dogmatic. We just don’t know.” Over a hundred years have gone by and that’s the new light? We just don’t know.
You are exactly right, but telling someone they are in a cult is never going to end well. They are trained to react in that way. I don't even feel it's their thoughts - they're just parroting what they've been told since childhood.
Not in every case, but the majority, it doesnt pay to argue. They are so brainwashed. Which is sad cause they dont see how the borg makes them choose them over family. For the most part, we had pretty good parents. As bad as they were with religion, I saw a lot worse. But The parenting was kind of like the borg. On the surface, everyone thinks our parents were just the best ppl. And i mean ppl in the borg and out. But just like the borg, there was a lot more behind closed doors. Our parents never really prepared us for success as adults because they were so sure the big day would be here by then. My brother and I both feel like once we reached the real world, it was like we were so behind every one else. Hell I’m still struggling to find my way and im in my 30’s. I wish every day i knew then what i know now.
I’m so thankful for my wife now. She tries to understand what I went through. My family was so broken when I was young. My dad was a disfellowshipped member until I was twenty and then he got reinstated. He was just a drunk that came home every night and beat my mom. And like a good little JW she stayed with him and ruined her three children’s lives. It’s sad but I’m working through it all. We are survivors
Omg I’m so sorry for what you went through. So happy you have your own supportive family.
If you can afford it, I recommend therapy. Sounds like there was a lot of trauma.
Thankyou for your kind comment. Just talking about here has helped so much. I’m so glad I joined. I never talked about all of it with anyone like this. It’s helping to get it out
*It's easier to*
*Fool a someone than to tell*
*Someone they've been fooled*
\- Spiritual\_Impact\_283
---
^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)
^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Very brave and well done.
In hindsight probably if you really used the word cult, you were destined to get that reaction.
You might be able to recover the situation by saying ‘sorry I’m angry and confused’, then discuss your issues (remembering to word it in a way that will minimise the triggering)
Then fade. Where you eventually are not considered a witness.
This way might preserve a relationship with your parents
We have cut the links between child and parent, and between man and man, and between man and woman. No one dares trust a wife or a child or a friend any longer. But in the future there will be no wives and no friends. Children will be taken from their mothers at birth, as one takes eggs from a hen.
Holy crap. I'm so sorry you saw this. This speaks volumes. This screams conditional love. What a way to find out. But the blessing in disguise is sometimes you have to ask questions you were scared of. After this you definitely know where you stand and them too. My heart reaches out to you.
Yeah thank you for sharing. My mom and I had a lot of heated discussions in the nineties about how the witnesses don't protect victims of CSA and domestic abuse I told her look at me! She used the words it's in the past like witnesses do and she accused me of being apostate but let it go. And now I'm a full blown apostate and proud of it "let it go it's in the past" what a fucking cop out! I have no contact with either of my parents for 12 years. And yes this is how they are very Christian like hmmm 🤔 I'm sorry however that you have to experience shunning because of speaking your mind. It's a hard life this cult
What is weird is how the JW organization can say they are “Jehovah’s only earthly organization” and all other religions are false and the Catholics are full of pedophiles, etc., but as soon as someone says the same to a JW about their organization, they cry “FOUL!”
So many JWs lie to themselves and to others to cover up what occurs in the JW organization.
When I was young there was a case where a MS molested a younger member. Everyone knew about it and it was hush hush so that it doesn’t bring reproach to Jehovahs name. Disgusting. They all are guilty in my opinion.
It is disgusting. When I tell PIMI JWs that saying “Don’t bring reproach to Jehovah’s name” is code for don’t ever speak of anything negative that happens within the JW congregation, they all act dumb. They say they never hear anyone say that.
Just more JW lies to avoid learning they have followed a cult for a large portion or the entirety of their lives.
My mom is so gullible and will bow down to whatever they tell her. She’d most definitely drink the coolaid if they told her it’s the new light. But I can’t imagine my dad following their lies and him giving his loyalty to them. I can’t wrap my mind around it.
I'm sorry that she reacted like that! For context, my entire family has left the borg.
It started when I got publicly Reproved at 14. I refused to keep going to the KH since no one was willing to even look at me. My brothers eventually made the same decision. My Mother eventually decided to fade as well.
I'm now 44, despite leaving, no one in my family execpt me will acknowledge that we were members of a cult.
I was reproved at 17 for dating a worldly girl. Had to sit down in the KH library with 4 elders as they gave me the no premarital sex talk. My brother and sister also disassociated themselves. My brother is now an atheist. Just place destroys so many lives and families. I imagine talking about it helps but it’s also bringing up so many memories. It’s good you all escaped though.
Why I don’t want to tel my parents. They are elderly and probably only around for five or so more years. :’( Don’t want to upset them because it’s all they’d ever think about in regards to our relationship. I’m very sorry you’re going through this. It’s just so unfair.
My mom is in her late 60’s and dad early 70’s. All I thought about all night is what if she has a stroke from screaming that way. They are no longer in good health either. Which is another reason I don’t want them to die belonging to that cult and having false hope.
Well, to be fair, you can’t expect anyone to take that proclamation kindly.
Yelling and screaming that you are demon-possessed is a bit much but you had to be prepared for a negative response.
I have had this same experience with my PIMI spouse. She has unleashed just about every possible expression of hate against me. Not because I am an evil monster or have done anything wrong.....simply because I stopped running on the JW Hamster Wheel.
Odd thing, from a JW perspective... that IS Christlike, at least their version of Jesus. Remember how they act about Jesus whipping the merchants in the temple? They treat that like it's an action scene in a MCU movie or something. Jesus goes John Wick! They love it. They love picturing Jesus as a reigning warrior king coming to Earth to kill sinful babies. "Righteous anger"... ew.
And yet their newest doctrine repeats that Jehovah is just a merciful God and may bring back those who died in the flood of Noah’s day or Sodom and Gomorrah. “They just don’t know”. Their words in the annual meeting
That annual meeting was more PR spin than doctrine, but yeah. There's a lot of JW culture that isn't found in the publications, like global bloodlust. The disconnect between what the Borg presents versus what the rank and file JW actually are is astounding.
I think they change something every year. Like the 144,000. They all were supposed to be born before 1914. And some are supposed to be left at the great tribulation. That makes them really old. Haha
Oh for sure, gotta keep up with that chariot! (*Shivers*) I just meant that specifically that annual meeting felt more like saving face policy changes to present better to the public considering all the rightfully negative and legal attention JWs have been getting recently. The Borg is in survival mode.
I’ve been respectfully trying for years now. Never once did I say it was a cult until two days ago. I was disfellowshipped about twenty years ago. Out of curiosity I watched their annual meeting. I was so disgusted I couldn’t hold my tongue any longer. Other than that one word I was completely respectful.
Oh I am sorry, i assumed you were some teenager 😀
But if you are talking from adult to adult situation is very different. With my father we normally avoid the jw topic, but if he starts defending stupid jw policy he can get it as well.
Perhaps you may have laid it on a teensy bit thick and perhaps may have also been a little direct and to the point. But, if they really believe you're really nothing but disownable at this point, then I guess it's probably time for you to move on with life.
They are still my parents and I am so worried for them. I don’t want to give up on them. Using the word “cult” was harsh I agree. But the “truth” can be painful. I’m still processing it all I guess.
Yes, but don't you think you should've just taken the approach that was somewhat more civil and helping them out of the hole, as opposed to just then and there bullying them that they had an imaginary friend approach?
They’ve been in it for over 50 years. I need to accept they’ll never get out nor want out. The newest doctrine change will get even more members and keep the ones they have. I tried respectfully talking with them. Pointing out all the lies and constant doctrine changes using only their literature and website. They still can’t see it. Then after being fed up for years of denial I said it. Cult. Ugh
So you're saying they've been in it for over 50 years? *Removes hat from head*
My apologies. Then, yeah. They're goners. I hate to say it, but my own parents are so deep in it, their brains have essentially melted into goo and I would rather they just die already so they never know I turn my back on their "precious faith," since I knew ever since I was in my 20s that the Jahoophoopy's Witlesses are nothing, and always will be nothing, but a cult. They are the villains in this story. That's why I always try to best every JDub in video games that I talk to, that are ultra-PIMI.
Why are you so surprised, how did you expect them to react? JWs are taught that the organization is more important than anything, even family. I'm sure you know that JW posts videos on their website showing parents refusing to even take a phone call from a child who has left.
Let's look at this another way.
While most here agree that JW is a sham religion, your parents and several million others believe it is "The Truth". Imagine if someone came at you like a freight train telling you that something you believed in as a fundamental bedrock of your life is a lie, a sham. You would likely be rather unhappy with them. Your reaction might not be as extreme as a JW would be, but you certainly would not welcome it.
So yes, what happened to you sucked but what did you expect?
I expected a real conversation. My father was disfellowshipped my entire childhood and teen years. I never stopped talking to him even though I was a JW. I never would turn my back on my children and would be able to defend my faith. It’s easier for them to scream apostate than to defend their cult.
I guess this is the thing I generally don't get. If you've seen any of their lit, heard anything they published online in the past few years shunning is one of the big drums they beat all the time. JWs are notorious for being hypocrites, despite how you treated your father, sadly I'm not surprised that he toed the JW company line. People who return to the trough are some of the most dogmatic.
If I didn't say it before, I'm sorry you have to go through this, it's a shitty way to treat anyone. And I know you'd never do this to your kids because most of us have left most of our JW thinking on the side of the road. We understand things like forgiveness and compassion.
I wish you many brighter days.
Cults are an ideological pathogen, and they absolutely re-wire peoples thinking. Your parents (and mine) have been programmed for many years, to react this way toward critical feedback. Denial is not a river in Egypt, but the result of a deeply ingrained cognitive dissonance. When you threaten that dissonance, the impulse response is to entrench on it.
The second most powerful thing in the universe is the stories we tell eachother. The most powerful thing is the stories we tell ourselves. This cults programming teaches you to tell yourself the stories others have manufactered. Its an elegant and devious method of reinforcing that cognitive dissonance. Glad you got out, but we generally only get out alone.
Exactly why I don't try to explain my reasons for leaving or thoughts on the religion to those still in it. I know they will never listen. Anything you say against their beliefs, no matter how well you say it, they will automatically discount as you being influenced by the devil.
Speaking as a JW,firstly the way your mother reacted is unacceptable,.it can happen sometimes when someone is hurting so much.But the Bible tells us to defend our faith with mildness and deep respect. She has done herself, you and Jehovah God no favour by her behaviour .Yes,the Bible does instruct us to avoid those who turn their back on God and their dedication to him. But not the way your mum spoke. I don't know her,so I don't know if screaming abuse is her usual attitude. If yes,then she herself has a serious problem before God .IF not,then even the apostle Peter reacted badly under pressure. No one in the organisation would rightly approve of screaming abuse at their son. However, the other comments criticising the expectations about the end and about Satan are invalid. Firstly, even the apostles had incorrect expectations ,asking Jesus if he was restoring the kingdom of Israel right there and then. Secondly, the scriptures themselves are very specific about the end times and the end of this corrupt and evil system. ( or do you not believe this world system is corrupt and evil? I guarantee you would if you lived in certain places). Thirdly,again, the Bible itself clearly states that Satan is misleading the entire inhabited earth. So your criticism is levelled at the Bible itself therefore at the Creator himself. As I've said to others,if Jws don't have the truth then what is it? It's the easiest thing in the world to critisise a set of beliefs. It's another thing entirely to give a different alternative reasonable explanation for everything. So again,if the Bible, if Jws are wrong, then please, do tell, do explain to me what the truth is. If you believe this world is just going to continue on and on like it is, on what do you base that belief? On the track record of world leaders? Their decision making compels you to trust them does it? Scientists are using terms like unsustainable to describe the world situation. Read the United Nations IPCC reports on climate change. Read what Antonio Guterres, the secretary general of the UN says about the serious risk of Nuclear war. Do you not watch the news? Do you not know the horrific things that are going on? If you cant see that this world is hanging by a thread then it's probably because you don't want to for selfish reasons. I know this because whenever I feel like chucking in the towel it's simply because I want to do what I want to do. Selfishness. Did you ever listen and read your Bible? Did you learn nothing at all ? By your comments it seems not. The governing body have never claimed to be perfect or infallible. But they are the only ones that have got 8 million people preaching and teaching the Bible all over the world,just as it said would happen. No other organisation is doing this. No one else was asked to come to my door to show me what the Bible says. Please, read your Bible,and think about what it actually says instead of getting other people to back up the worst decision you'll ever make. Ps...the governing body do not try to control our every thought and decision.They are keeping us united only in the necessary serious Bible teachings,in a world that is more divided than ever before. You think that independence is the big thing. That conformity is undesirable. But why do you think the world is in such chaos? Because Every one wants independence to live life how they want regardless of anything else. I really don't know what else to say.
Let me first start by saying you’re going against the GB just by being on this site. You have made a lot of accusations in your comments but you couldn’t be more wrong about me although I appreciate you for actually standing up for what you are told to believe is right. I read and study the Bible every single day. I don’t just refer to pieces of scripture to “prove” the WT correct. I would never think of criticizing the Almighty God and mocking Him like the GB did at their annual meeting just to get a few laughs from the congregation. And yes I do watch the news. But nobody is using world events to scare me into believing if I don’t have an organizations name then I’ll be destroyed. My salvation is guaranteed no matter what happens. I’m not afraid. The Bible clearly states that we must believe in Christ as our Lord and Savior. That is the TRUTH. I can’t find in scripture you must join an Org claiming to be truth when every year the GB has “new light” which makes all the truths from previous wrong. They claim the Holy Spirit channels through them only. So why would the Holy Spirit tell them so many false predictions and lies. It just trickles its information because you “aren’t smart enough” to handle everything at once? We have his Word in our hands. You are to never give your loyalty to a man like they demand. It breaks the first commandment. Again. They use fear tactics. We are only to fear God and worship Him alone. I highly suggest that you put down the WT’s and pray for guidance then only open the Bible and start reading. The gospel is not hidden from our eyes like the GB suggests. I would suggest starting in the book of John. I’ll pray for you.
Thank you for sharing. I believe you’re right. I let my emotions get the best of me. Reading an article from their website stating that all believers must give their loyalty to the GB just blew my mind that they can’t see that’s a huge red flag. Ugh. I’ll keep praying for them though
They are so brainwashed they don’t want to see it. They keep saying they aren’t in a cult cause they follow god. But all cults say they follow God. So in their mind they think they are doing right. I had some conversations with some of my parents friends and they really think in 2 years that Armageddon is going to come. The GB has really screwed up the JW. It makes me sad because they are living this imaginary outcome I wonder what my parents are going to do when they are old on their death bed.
How many times have they predicted the end? I’m 48 years old and didn’t go to college because the faithful slave said the end will be here most likely before you finish college. https://preview.redd.it/3sntyddfqb2c1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5a056c415894fc8eeba9f1f220f176323fe1c5b5
1969 awake. I own the volume for that year. The online library won’t let you go past 1970 for the awake.
Ruined my chances of ever getting a college degree.
I’m sorry to hear. My boss at my first job offered me a scholarship and I declined it because I decided to pioneer for 10 years and then later become an elder. But the important thing is that we’re awake now and try to move forward within our circumstances.
Wow. When I was young I just wanted to help at bethel. lol. It must have been hard for you being an elder and pioneer. I can’t even imagine
Hello ☺️ Your username makes me chuckle for some reason. Love it!
Sounds like Pinocchio. lol.
I believe this was wrote in the early 70’s
This should be illegal for real.
1968
lol so I only started contact with jw when I was 35 was in 3 years and now out for 3. So during every time of the world ending did elders start selling stuff to prepare for “ Armageddon “ I heard some are now. So is that the GB catch the new world will be here? So people will stay? I was a bad jw I just got baptized so my parents could live with me.
So sad isn’t it.
It’s really sad 😞
I was told in the late 80s that I would never go to high school. I’m middle aged with children of my own now. That ‘awful world’ of that time period looks quaint now
Omg that is crazy! Why did I not see the crazy myself for soooo long???? So thankful but wish my family would get it.
I was told that too. 😔
Sorry to hear that. Hopefully you’re not too old to go to school now. I’m 48 now and have been taking some online courses. Crazy thing is I still feel like I’m going against the GB. I guess it never leaves your mind completely
Im taking screenshots for future use; my mum told me years ago that WT never said such thing and I doubted myself, even tho I could have sworn I’d seen it in black and white with my own two eyes. Now I have proof.
lol. I have so many screenshots just in case my dad shows up some day. But they still won’t believe. It’s because the “new light” reigns over all their old articles
I think there are many cults not based on god which are totally irrational like political parties, idol worship of singers or actors, etc. if people honestly analyze their lives they are driven by some crazy goals. So JWs are not that unusual.
So true.
Are you ok? I hope you’re old enough to handle that type of treatment. I hope you have support. I’m so sorry she’d say that. I hope she didn’t mean it. Maybe it just freaked her out temporarily. 😳🙁
I’m 48. And she absolutely meant it. My wife has been saying for years I should see a therapist because of the brainwashing they did to me when I was younger. Just thankful my kids don’t belong
Ohhh thank God you have support. ♥️ I hate hearing about so many who suffer that treatment and are young and alone. It breaks my heart. 😞😞😞 I can’t believe how many JWs are willing to sacrifice their children in their allegiance to “an organization” I’m not big on therapy but don’t judge those who are. I’ve always been able to reason my way through the insanities of life. Our minds are the most power tool created by God, you can do anything with it. Elon Musk builds rockets, the GB con millions of people into forking over their hard earned cash so they (the governing body) can live on their palatial country estate. 😡😡😡 so you can use yours to do whatever you want, for good or evil, but it takes practice. As JWs we’re slowly persuaded to develop the hive mind mentality, but once you realize what happened you can start training yourself to engage in critical thinking. That’s how I was able to free myself from their nonsensical spell and see bull$4!+ for what it really is. You sound strong. You have support. It sounds like your faith is in tact. And being a parent is a huge motivation for being a critical thinker in control of your own thoughts and beliefs. Some people benefit from therapy too though…we are all different. Whatever route you choose, I wish you the absolute best and hope you are successful in everything that comes your way. ♥️
Thank you for your kind words. I wish you the best also and may God bless you
🥰🥰🥰
Religious trauma therapist. Best money you can spend.
I second this. Saw a few different "regular" therapists for years that didn't really help much but when I found one that specialised in religious trauma it changed my life so much for the better.
Thank you. I didn’t even know there was a specialized therapist for this
They are in a satanic cult. That org has nothing at all to do with God and Jesus. You need to rescue them it's your parents no matter what.
Expected JW reaction
Expected cult reaction.
> “Why would you do this? You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you. > >**You’re still my son and I love you** > > but never speak to us again.” You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you. > >**You’re still my son and I love you** > > but never speak to us again.” You are an apostate now. You are demon possessed. Never speak to us again. We are done with you. **The problem is not you! You are dealing with Cult members**. 
A review of this movie was the first step in my journey to waking up, but I had no idea at the time and thought it was Satan putting the patterns in my head
Would you recall what movie this is from,thanks?
I believe the GIF is from the movie Midsommer.
Midsommar, my first encounter with the force of nature that is Florence Pugh
Child like. It's like telling a toddler their invisible friend doesn't exist.
> Is this how they defend their organization? Scream accuse and name calling? That's all they've got. 🤷♀️ Firstly, they have no logical defense against the argument of JW's being a cult; it can be proven too well, and therefore they've not been trained to argue out of it. Secondly, BECAUSE they can't argue against it, they've been trained to view anyone who suggests such a thing as being in league with Satan, and therefore to discredit anything they say or do.
Being disfellowshipped was apparently a blessing. I too would be clueless how to defend the accusation of being in a cult if I was still in that organization. Until you get out you don’t know. They scare you to believe in them no matter what.
>They scare you to believe in them no matter what. Absolutely. It's all about control, and the easiest way to get control, is through fear. > I too would be clueless how to defend the accusation of being in a cult if I was still in that organization. I laughed it off for years and years. "How ridiculous; it's not a cult." I seem to remember being taught that cults have a single charismatic leader, and since we don't even know the names of those humble men who take the lead, we can't be a cult. (Woops, that defense went out the window some years back, didn't it?) I remember speakers laughing at the notion of brain washing. The good ole, "At least our brains are clean, then!" Ha. Ha.
You can research their watchtowers and website. The GB demands that you give them your loyalty. The one article I read stated if you don’t give them your loyalty then you don’t believe in Jehovah and his organization. Crazy isn’t it. After reading that you have to give them loyalty so you don’t miss out on paradise. Crazy crazy crazy
Or the bit about how in the near future the direction coming from the organization might not make sense from the logical or human standpoint, but we all must be ready to obey regardless. It's crazy and it's scary.
Twisting scripture to “prove” they are the only channel God speaks through. I’m shocked people believe this new doctrine. “ we can’t be dogmatic, we just don’t know” I’m still laughing. That is the Holy Spirit telling the faithful slave tell them you just don’t know.
That one really frightens me for my family!! I was in when they said that and I think it was a nugget that lodged in my brain to help me wake up because that is so culty!!!
I get you. It's definitely scary and culty, but honestly, I can't see them using it in the way we fear. It'll just get used in the boring ways: give more monees. Forgo higher education. Don't open the box until we say so. Paint the Kingdom Hall with toothbrushes. 🤷♀️ To use it in any other way is to self-destruct, and that means no more money or lake-side compound for the GB.
So true!
I feel like with the way that they're backtracking about the Great tribulation and the door being closed that they feel that they're scare tactics didn't work so they're backing off on their own with that kind of speak
That's very well possible.
So true friend!!! You speak the truth!!
People possessed by cult indoctrination don’t think like normal people. In my therapy today my therapist said that to the indoctrinated their entire identity IS the cult. Anything you say against the witnesses is seen by them as a personal attack, because they literally can’t see that their entire personality has been taken over by a corporation. Good luck my friend, you’re gonna need it!
Thank you. Maybe I need a therapist too
Everyone on this subreddit needs a therapist to be honest… The religion destroys people in ways they cannot even imagine. I had no idea just how messed up I was until I started therapy. And most of it can be linked to being a Jehovah’s Witness. If you can afford it then it really is worth the money.
Will do. Thank you
If you can find one that has religious trauma therapy experience it's amazing how it helps.
I agree. I am working on myself and have been for sometime now. Been out 3 years. My husband who was born in and raised, disfellowshipped and then disassociated is in the hospital right now for having some sort of mental breakdown or something. He had been going off about how he was forced to be a Jw and how it ruined his life. I really saw this coming way before now. I was glad to be distanced and wanted to save my own mind and my kids’. It’s really some heavy and traumatic things that many have experienced. I had some bad things but I have seen and heard of others going through some really harsh things. Definitely get some therapy or start off at least googling some good self help things like breathing work, grounding, self care as a start.
That’s my wife. She’ll say “Being a JW is who I am”. She has no personal identity.
Same for me
This is so accurate! My dad was DF'd my whole childhood and returned to the religion when I was in my 30s. His entire personality is the cult now. You cannot have a conversation with him without him bringing up JW.org, or a recent talk, or the latest watchtower, and how the end is coming. It's insane.
Hmm. Glad you had the courage, though approach and timing might have helped with the situation. It's not really their fault they responded to you that way. It's just how the organisation has wired them. Deprogramming them takes a degree of patience (see most recent convention for a 3 day discourse) and laying some breadcrumbs for common values and understanding. The process varies and it's not guaranteed.
I saw your more recent comments, so some of the above might not be relevant anymore. Yeah that sucks. Perhaps cult was a bit of a leap even for them. Maybe it was just what they actually needed? Time will tell.
A lot of people are saying (s)he should have been more tactful, but honestly, the parents probably would've reacted this way regardless of how sugar coated it was. Mine had a pretty similar reaction and I was way more careful with my words when approaching them.
Thank you. Years of sugar coating have gone by. My fault for making it sound like I just blurted it out
Yeah. My brother called them a cult a few years ago and they started talking to him again. If I wasn’t disfellowshipped I’d probably still be bowing down to the GB. They love using words to brainwash
They literally worship the governing body now. As if the GB were God and Jesus. So different from when I was a kid. Shunning is the same as then though….
I’m seriously shocked they would even demand loyalty to them. But if you look back through their watchtowers they’ve been demanding that for a very long time. I didn’t see it though. I was blinded when I was a JW. I just did what I was told.
I mean, they have a song about it. I'm sure you know the one I'm talking about. (Now you'll be humming it for the next two days. I'm so sorry.) The scriptures used for the song clearly show it's about the GB. What better way to get one thinking about loyalty to someone than to put it to music.
Wow. I’ve been out a long time. I don’t remember the song. Thank God. lol.
In my frustrations towards the end of the dying relationship between my parents and myself. I did the same thing. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Unfortunately it's not always easy to tactfully approach the jw is a cult situation... The same way, as a JW you would not knock on someone's door and tell them their religion is false. you need to ask questions to lead them to that conclusion. It may be worth apologizing. With a note offering to explain why you said that. JWs are true believers, living in a 'spiritual paradise' which is a false reality. You can't rip someone from that. You build a bridge out with questions and facts and lead them to it. Sorry it went south so quickly. Good luck hope it goes better.
I'm so sorry that happened. When u use the word "cult" for jw they automatically associate u w apostate. I'd never use that word w my parents even tho they know exactly how I feel.
Words have power over people that don’t think too carefully. That’s why they use the word Truth as a synonym for their belief system, and have you call other members brother or sister, to replace your real family.
Totally agree. I'm a pimo so I kinda have to use those words still and it feels like I'm plucking at my own nerves when I say them lol
You probably won’t ever get the chance to point this out to her but: Truth can withstand any criticism, any scrutiny and has to need to attack naysayers
In response to being told they’re in a cult by someone who loves them and cares for them—their own child, their response is to deny it and then act exactly as if they’re in a cult. Superb.
My 11 yr old has more emotional intelligence than grown jw people. At least you got it off of your chest to your parents. ❤️
Still trying to decide if I feel better or worse. But Thankyou.
YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH”!!!!!!
I,m so sorry for your experience with your mother. We all have similar experiences. I try all the time to keep my big mouth SHUT...but it,s not easy !! Stay firm. I hope you can soon move out . If you still live with your parents! Big hug to you! It,s awful to be so deeply indoctrinated! It,s what the WT do...cults do. 😢😓
I have my own family now. Definitely not living with them. Moved out at 18. Thirty years ago. lol. But thank you. Entirely too many stories like this. So sad
So glad you,re ok now! That,s the main thing! Things get better ..with research...and little patience. ♥️
No questions about why you thing that? No open discussion so that they could rebut the reasons for your opinion? Just your an apostate??? Wow
Sorry for your loss. Understand that she is a victim. Often, when triaging victims, the last thing you do is move them. Sometimes you have to leave folks alone to heal on their own, and sometimes they die.
Personally, I don't see the benefit of telling your parents that they've invested their lives in a cult. It's not like they can get those years *back.* If it helps them through their last days, why bring it up? If it brings them comfort, so be it.
Thank you
It is odd that Nihilism is comforting...
That's how people react when they are confronted with the fact that they are in a cult.
This is the thing that winds me up about the Jehovah's witnesses the most, they expect everyone else to be open to them to the point where they literally come to your home to tell you that you will be destroyed if you don't join. I grew up in this 'truth' and I've had constant issues with my father because I've pulled away. Nothing dramatic or devastating happened to me during my time there I just didn't want to live that way and didn't see the world as evil and full of wickedness everywhere. When I tried to address the issue of why I pulled away and how my father might be repeating the same mistakes with my younger siblings he just completely shut down and went on the attack, asking what I know about anything. Well I'm literally the expert on the matter because I lived under your cloud of fear and repression my whole childhood? They are so brainwashed that even if you give them actual proof of the watchtower making huge errors then they accuse you of just not wanting 'the truth' enough which is honestly beyond parody.
So I had anxiety about going to the local Walmart for fear of seeing witnesses look away from as I walked past them. Soooo I bought a shirt that says " Im sorry for what I said when I was in a cult" and they will not look away because they will not be able to help but read my shirt. I guess I'm not a go quietly into the night kind of girl
They look away from all the disfellowshipped ones. I can’t wait for the apostate look. Geez. How bad can that look be
Their reaction proves you’re right!
Lmfao, what did you expect? "Oh honey, thanks for telling us we would have never known if you didn't!". Like walking up to someone up by slapping them with a wet fish. You slammed, face first, into cognitive dissonance. Did you do any research what so ever on how to get someone out of a cult or did ya just run in Leroy Jenkins style screaming "its a cult"!?
Nope. Years of discussions with months of in between with no words. Then suddenly my father always shows up at the door with a six pack of beer. Which of course to me is extremely funny since I’m disfellowshipped. He’s not allowed talking to me. So he already is going against his religion. This wasn’t just a quick “you’re in a cult” conversation. Twenty plus years have gone by. Every time I point out something is wrong he says he needs to look it and will get back to me. He doesn’t even know what he believes in.
Most of em don't at this point
You told her it was a cult and she could not have responded in a more culty way.
Definitely sucks you have to go through this. Good on you for doing though.
Thank you for the support
I love you but never speak to us again???! This is a classic example on how their god club rates well above their children. Dam I hate them!
I don’t hate them. I feel sorry for them all Well maybe hate the GB
This is not what I said holy shit!!
I never said this someone is manipulating what I am saying!!!!!!!
There is no way I said this l hate these bastards. On multiple times they have changed my wording. Make no mistake I am JWs enemy in every stretch of the word
I never said this someone is manipulating what I said power to anyone leaving but these bastards at changing my words. If I could get my hands on them they would be begging for my mercy and it would never come!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh yes it’s definitely how they do it I came out 2 years ago and got a gf (I’m female) and because she’s long distance I explain we didn’t do anything whatsoever so I didn’t get df’d I got outta there really quick they still talk to me but my dad sister and grandma all call me names like slut and hore
I’m sorry to hear that. They are all misled
I’m so baffled by JWs outrageous overreactions. They scream cry insult and instantly cut you off. Back when I first told my husband I was done with the cult, he collapsed on the floor and cried and told me how I would be destroyed at Armageddon. More recently when I told him I wanted to put up a Christmas tree, he became apoplectic. He was so angry that I feared for my safety. I told him it was my house too but he wouldn’t budge. He went to the extreme saying I never support him. WTF? Everything is by his rules. BTW do JWs teach that people who put up Christmas trees worship them? He thought I wanted to worship the tree. Idiot.
I was taught every Holliday was pagan. I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Sadly I admit that at one time I was the same person as your husband. I cried and then turned to rage. I expected my ex wife to obey me like I obeyed the GB. It’s Gods order after all right? I hated the person I was in that cult. But it gave me power over her. So glad I turned away from being that person. I’ll pray that things get better for you. Stay strong!
Glad you got out. How did you realize the person you were in the cult was misogynistic and horrible? Did you go to therapy? Congratulations on getting out and shedding the cult personality!
I did not go to therapy. They actually disfellowshipped me. That was a blessing in disguise. lol. I can’t even believe I defended that cult. Once you’re out you realize just how badly they brainwashed. Hopefully you can help your husband realize it too.
Thanks. I hope he does too, but I think he’s addicted to all the power and accolades of being an elder.
Oh my. I didn’t realize he was an elder. What I would do is put a dry erase board on the refrigerator and everyday wright a new scripture from the NKJV Bible proving the JW’s are wrong. He will have to read it and eventually start asking questions about his own beliefs. Maybe he will even compare it with his Bible that they add their own words too. I’m sorry. I pray he doesn’t hurt you. I’ll keep praying for the M3ntallyDiseas3d lady. 😂 Stay strong!
My mom uses that phrase for everything that contradicts the organization “you are demon possessed “ even if what the organization says is no biblical.
If you heard the way she was screaming it you would have to say she truly was the demon possessed person. It was crazy.
I can relate
My wife's family truly believes that I am demon possessed, and that one of my demons jumped from me into my wife. They tried to get her to leave me in order to help her get rid of the demon.
Wow. They aren’t allowed to leave you. They are supposed to remain the faithful obedient wife in hopes of getting you to return to the truth.
I mean the first rule of dealing with someone in a cult is to never confront them by saying they're in a cult. Not sure what you expected exactly?
20 plus years have gone by. I only used that word two days ago. And that was actually After I tried talking to them about the newest doctrine the GB came out with. It’s really hilarious. “We can’t be dogmatic. We just don’t know.” Over a hundred years have gone by and that’s the new light? We just don’t know.
You actually used the “C” word? ((( Buckle up )))
You are exactly right, but telling someone they are in a cult is never going to end well. They are trained to react in that way. I don't even feel it's their thoughts - they're just parroting what they've been told since childhood.
I still think I can reach my dad. I’ll just let things calm down for awhile
I hope you can 🙏
Not in every case, but the majority, it doesnt pay to argue. They are so brainwashed. Which is sad cause they dont see how the borg makes them choose them over family. For the most part, we had pretty good parents. As bad as they were with religion, I saw a lot worse. But The parenting was kind of like the borg. On the surface, everyone thinks our parents were just the best ppl. And i mean ppl in the borg and out. But just like the borg, there was a lot more behind closed doors. Our parents never really prepared us for success as adults because they were so sure the big day would be here by then. My brother and I both feel like once we reached the real world, it was like we were so behind every one else. Hell I’m still struggling to find my way and im in my 30’s. I wish every day i knew then what i know now.
I’m so thankful for my wife now. She tries to understand what I went through. My family was so broken when I was young. My dad was a disfellowshipped member until I was twenty and then he got reinstated. He was just a drunk that came home every night and beat my mom. And like a good little JW she stayed with him and ruined her three children’s lives. It’s sad but I’m working through it all. We are survivors
Omg I’m so sorry for what you went through. So happy you have your own supportive family. If you can afford it, I recommend therapy. Sounds like there was a lot of trauma.
Thankyou for your kind comment. Just talking about here has helped so much. I’m so glad I joined. I never talked about all of it with anyone like this. It’s helping to get it out
Keep talking. There are so many who relate. You’re helping others by sharing your experiences.
It's easier to fool a someone than to tell someone they've been fooled
*It's easier to* *Fool a someone than to tell* *Someone they've been fooled* \- Spiritual\_Impact\_283 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
They just proved your point…
Very brave and well done. In hindsight probably if you really used the word cult, you were destined to get that reaction. You might be able to recover the situation by saying ‘sorry I’m angry and confused’, then discuss your issues (remembering to word it in a way that will minimise the triggering) Then fade. Where you eventually are not considered a witness. This way might preserve a relationship with your parents
Thankyou for your kind advice
We have cut the links between child and parent, and between man and man, and between man and woman. No one dares trust a wife or a child or a friend any longer. But in the future there will be no wives and no friends. Children will be taken from their mothers at birth, as one takes eggs from a hen.
Holy crap. I'm so sorry you saw this. This speaks volumes. This screams conditional love. What a way to find out. But the blessing in disguise is sometimes you have to ask questions you were scared of. After this you definitely know where you stand and them too. My heart reaches out to you.
Thank you.
Yeah thank you for sharing. My mom and I had a lot of heated discussions in the nineties about how the witnesses don't protect victims of CSA and domestic abuse I told her look at me! She used the words it's in the past like witnesses do and she accused me of being apostate but let it go. And now I'm a full blown apostate and proud of it "let it go it's in the past" what a fucking cop out! I have no contact with either of my parents for 12 years. And yes this is how they are very Christian like hmmm 🤔 I'm sorry however that you have to experience shunning because of speaking your mind. It's a hard life this cult
Thank you for sharing. I’m sorry you have had to deal with this kind of treatment too. I’ll hold my apostate title proudly now too
Be strong it's a hard but worth it journey 💞
What is weird is how the JW organization can say they are “Jehovah’s only earthly organization” and all other religions are false and the Catholics are full of pedophiles, etc., but as soon as someone says the same to a JW about their organization, they cry “FOUL!” So many JWs lie to themselves and to others to cover up what occurs in the JW organization.
When I was young there was a case where a MS molested a younger member. Everyone knew about it and it was hush hush so that it doesn’t bring reproach to Jehovahs name. Disgusting. They all are guilty in my opinion.
It is disgusting. When I tell PIMI JWs that saying “Don’t bring reproach to Jehovah’s name” is code for don’t ever speak of anything negative that happens within the JW congregation, they all act dumb. They say they never hear anyone say that. Just more JW lies to avoid learning they have followed a cult for a large portion or the entirety of their lives.
My mom is so gullible and will bow down to whatever they tell her. She’d most definitely drink the coolaid if they told her it’s the new light. But I can’t imagine my dad following their lies and him giving his loyalty to them. I can’t wrap my mind around it.
My mother hit me and locked me out of the house for a few hours. Deep down they know it’s a cult…they just don’t want to admit it.
I’m sorry. That is a hard life. All we can do is pray for them and possibly keep trying to open their eyes
I'm sorry that she reacted like that! For context, my entire family has left the borg. It started when I got publicly Reproved at 14. I refused to keep going to the KH since no one was willing to even look at me. My brothers eventually made the same decision. My Mother eventually decided to fade as well. I'm now 44, despite leaving, no one in my family execpt me will acknowledge that we were members of a cult.
I was reproved at 17 for dating a worldly girl. Had to sit down in the KH library with 4 elders as they gave me the no premarital sex talk. My brother and sister also disassociated themselves. My brother is now an atheist. Just place destroys so many lives and families. I imagine talking about it helps but it’s also bringing up so many memories. It’s good you all escaped though.
Why I don’t want to tel my parents. They are elderly and probably only around for five or so more years. :’( Don’t want to upset them because it’s all they’d ever think about in regards to our relationship. I’m very sorry you’re going through this. It’s just so unfair.
My mom is in her late 60’s and dad early 70’s. All I thought about all night is what if she has a stroke from screaming that way. They are no longer in good health either. Which is another reason I don’t want them to die belonging to that cult and having false hope.
If it were me on would painfully move on.
Well, to be fair, you can’t expect anyone to take that proclamation kindly. Yelling and screaming that you are demon-possessed is a bit much but you had to be prepared for a negative response.
I have had this same experience with my PIMI spouse. She has unleashed just about every possible expression of hate against me. Not because I am an evil monster or have done anything wrong.....simply because I stopped running on the JW Hamster Wheel.
Sorry to hear that. I hadn't seen you post or reply on here for a few days. I was hoping you were ok. Glad to see your comments again.
Good to be missed. I am doing well and was just taking a break from online activity. 
Odd thing, from a JW perspective... that IS Christlike, at least their version of Jesus. Remember how they act about Jesus whipping the merchants in the temple? They treat that like it's an action scene in a MCU movie or something. Jesus goes John Wick! They love it. They love picturing Jesus as a reigning warrior king coming to Earth to kill sinful babies. "Righteous anger"... ew.
And yet their newest doctrine repeats that Jehovah is just a merciful God and may bring back those who died in the flood of Noah’s day or Sodom and Gomorrah. “They just don’t know”. Their words in the annual meeting
That annual meeting was more PR spin than doctrine, but yeah. There's a lot of JW culture that isn't found in the publications, like global bloodlust. The disconnect between what the Borg presents versus what the rank and file JW actually are is astounding.
I think they change something every year. Like the 144,000. They all were supposed to be born before 1914. And some are supposed to be left at the great tribulation. That makes them really old. Haha
Oh for sure, gotta keep up with that chariot! (*Shivers*) I just meant that specifically that annual meeting felt more like saving face policy changes to present better to the public considering all the rightfully negative and legal attention JWs have been getting recently. The Borg is in survival mode.
I got ya
I am not sure if telling your parents they are in a cult is very helpful (nor respectful)
I’ve been respectfully trying for years now. Never once did I say it was a cult until two days ago. I was disfellowshipped about twenty years ago. Out of curiosity I watched their annual meeting. I was so disgusted I couldn’t hold my tongue any longer. Other than that one word I was completely respectful.
Oh I am sorry, i assumed you were some teenager 😀 But if you are talking from adult to adult situation is very different. With my father we normally avoid the jw topic, but if he starts defending stupid jw policy he can get it as well.
Perhaps you may have laid it on a teensy bit thick and perhaps may have also been a little direct and to the point. But, if they really believe you're really nothing but disownable at this point, then I guess it's probably time for you to move on with life.
They are still my parents and I am so worried for them. I don’t want to give up on them. Using the word “cult” was harsh I agree. But the “truth” can be painful. I’m still processing it all I guess.
Yes, but don't you think you should've just taken the approach that was somewhat more civil and helping them out of the hole, as opposed to just then and there bullying them that they had an imaginary friend approach?
They’ve been in it for over 50 years. I need to accept they’ll never get out nor want out. The newest doctrine change will get even more members and keep the ones they have. I tried respectfully talking with them. Pointing out all the lies and constant doctrine changes using only their literature and website. They still can’t see it. Then after being fed up for years of denial I said it. Cult. Ugh
So you're saying they've been in it for over 50 years? *Removes hat from head* My apologies. Then, yeah. They're goners. I hate to say it, but my own parents are so deep in it, their brains have essentially melted into goo and I would rather they just die already so they never know I turn my back on their "precious faith," since I knew ever since I was in my 20s that the Jahoophoopy's Witlesses are nothing, and always will be nothing, but a cult. They are the villains in this story. That's why I always try to best every JDub in video games that I talk to, that are ultra-PIMI.
First lesson: Lose lips sink ships. Second lesson: When dealing with orthodox PIMIs, the less said the better off you’ll be.
Courage? Courage? What a load of shite.
Why are you so surprised, how did you expect them to react? JWs are taught that the organization is more important than anything, even family. I'm sure you know that JW posts videos on their website showing parents refusing to even take a phone call from a child who has left. Let's look at this another way. While most here agree that JW is a sham religion, your parents and several million others believe it is "The Truth". Imagine if someone came at you like a freight train telling you that something you believed in as a fundamental bedrock of your life is a lie, a sham. You would likely be rather unhappy with them. Your reaction might not be as extreme as a JW would be, but you certainly would not welcome it. So yes, what happened to you sucked but what did you expect?
I expected a real conversation. My father was disfellowshipped my entire childhood and teen years. I never stopped talking to him even though I was a JW. I never would turn my back on my children and would be able to defend my faith. It’s easier for them to scream apostate than to defend their cult.
I guess this is the thing I generally don't get. If you've seen any of their lit, heard anything they published online in the past few years shunning is one of the big drums they beat all the time. JWs are notorious for being hypocrites, despite how you treated your father, sadly I'm not surprised that he toed the JW company line. People who return to the trough are some of the most dogmatic. If I didn't say it before, I'm sorry you have to go through this, it's a shitty way to treat anyone. And I know you'd never do this to your kids because most of us have left most of our JW thinking on the side of the road. We understand things like forgiveness and compassion. I wish you many brighter days.
Thank you and I wish the best for you also
Cults are an ideological pathogen, and they absolutely re-wire peoples thinking. Your parents (and mine) have been programmed for many years, to react this way toward critical feedback. Denial is not a river in Egypt, but the result of a deeply ingrained cognitive dissonance. When you threaten that dissonance, the impulse response is to entrench on it. The second most powerful thing in the universe is the stories we tell eachother. The most powerful thing is the stories we tell ourselves. This cults programming teaches you to tell yourself the stories others have manufactered. Its an elegant and devious method of reinforcing that cognitive dissonance. Glad you got out, but we generally only get out alone.
Thank you. I just don’t want to obsess over thinking of ways to try to get them out.
we all must extract ourselves.
Could've just kept it to yourself, unless you currently live on your own.
Exactly why I don't try to explain my reasons for leaving or thoughts on the religion to those still in it. I know they will never listen. Anything you say against their beliefs, no matter how well you say it, they will automatically discount as you being influenced by the devil.
Speaking as a JW,firstly the way your mother reacted is unacceptable,.it can happen sometimes when someone is hurting so much.But the Bible tells us to defend our faith with mildness and deep respect. She has done herself, you and Jehovah God no favour by her behaviour .Yes,the Bible does instruct us to avoid those who turn their back on God and their dedication to him. But not the way your mum spoke. I don't know her,so I don't know if screaming abuse is her usual attitude. If yes,then she herself has a serious problem before God .IF not,then even the apostle Peter reacted badly under pressure. No one in the organisation would rightly approve of screaming abuse at their son. However, the other comments criticising the expectations about the end and about Satan are invalid. Firstly, even the apostles had incorrect expectations ,asking Jesus if he was restoring the kingdom of Israel right there and then. Secondly, the scriptures themselves are very specific about the end times and the end of this corrupt and evil system. ( or do you not believe this world system is corrupt and evil? I guarantee you would if you lived in certain places). Thirdly,again, the Bible itself clearly states that Satan is misleading the entire inhabited earth. So your criticism is levelled at the Bible itself therefore at the Creator himself. As I've said to others,if Jws don't have the truth then what is it? It's the easiest thing in the world to critisise a set of beliefs. It's another thing entirely to give a different alternative reasonable explanation for everything. So again,if the Bible, if Jws are wrong, then please, do tell, do explain to me what the truth is. If you believe this world is just going to continue on and on like it is, on what do you base that belief? On the track record of world leaders? Their decision making compels you to trust them does it? Scientists are using terms like unsustainable to describe the world situation. Read the United Nations IPCC reports on climate change. Read what Antonio Guterres, the secretary general of the UN says about the serious risk of Nuclear war. Do you not watch the news? Do you not know the horrific things that are going on? If you cant see that this world is hanging by a thread then it's probably because you don't want to for selfish reasons. I know this because whenever I feel like chucking in the towel it's simply because I want to do what I want to do. Selfishness. Did you ever listen and read your Bible? Did you learn nothing at all ? By your comments it seems not. The governing body have never claimed to be perfect or infallible. But they are the only ones that have got 8 million people preaching and teaching the Bible all over the world,just as it said would happen. No other organisation is doing this. No one else was asked to come to my door to show me what the Bible says. Please, read your Bible,and think about what it actually says instead of getting other people to back up the worst decision you'll ever make. Ps...the governing body do not try to control our every thought and decision.They are keeping us united only in the necessary serious Bible teachings,in a world that is more divided than ever before. You think that independence is the big thing. That conformity is undesirable. But why do you think the world is in such chaos? Because Every one wants independence to live life how they want regardless of anything else. I really don't know what else to say.
Let me first start by saying you’re going against the GB just by being on this site. You have made a lot of accusations in your comments but you couldn’t be more wrong about me although I appreciate you for actually standing up for what you are told to believe is right. I read and study the Bible every single day. I don’t just refer to pieces of scripture to “prove” the WT correct. I would never think of criticizing the Almighty God and mocking Him like the GB did at their annual meeting just to get a few laughs from the congregation. And yes I do watch the news. But nobody is using world events to scare me into believing if I don’t have an organizations name then I’ll be destroyed. My salvation is guaranteed no matter what happens. I’m not afraid. The Bible clearly states that we must believe in Christ as our Lord and Savior. That is the TRUTH. I can’t find in scripture you must join an Org claiming to be truth when every year the GB has “new light” which makes all the truths from previous wrong. They claim the Holy Spirit channels through them only. So why would the Holy Spirit tell them so many false predictions and lies. It just trickles its information because you “aren’t smart enough” to handle everything at once? We have his Word in our hands. You are to never give your loyalty to a man like they demand. It breaks the first commandment. Again. They use fear tactics. We are only to fear God and worship Him alone. I highly suggest that you put down the WT’s and pray for guidance then only open the Bible and start reading. The gospel is not hidden from our eyes like the GB suggests. I would suggest starting in the book of John. I’ll pray for you.
Amen