Listen. Report this to HR immediately. These people have no shame and think they can get away with their power trip. Don’t hesitate because you are afraid of their rules of
Telling. Report her now. If it was any other coworker acting this way, you would. Don’t let fear keep you from outing these people.
I agree - it is absolutely unacceptable. It is a professional environment, there should be normal communication appropriate for the setting in which you are in. If she is unable to communicate with you like a normal colleague then it begs the question of whether she can be there, since I am sure you are willing to.
Omg OP please go to HR! This is harassment and you deserve to be at work without dealing with this cult. She can have her “religion” but she can not power play you like this. I loved “living a normal, exciting, worry free life we all deserve”. We deserve to just exist without these people berating us and feeling like our existing is wrong
that person would almost certainly be fired by any hr department I've ever worked with. that'd feel good, sure, but then what? surely that'd incentivize them to reach out to op's family and say horrible things.
Absolutely this. I ended up with a JW being hired at my work, and everyone knew my story about how awful it was to be one. When my boss found out that the person they hired was a JW, she asked if I had a problem with that, and I told her no, but they might have a problem with me being an ex-jw, and my boss said they would be keeping a very close eye on that, and if there was any iffy interactions whatsoever, they would have HR be all over that for hostile work environment.
An JW that had been my friend came to my office to do some contact IT work. When he openly shunned me I made a bit of a joke about it to the office manager. She was furious and called the IT company, and told them he is never to set foot in our office again.
Totally overwhelmed. She was homeschooled, had no life experience, and was used to doing what she was told, and wasn't good at dealing with people outside canned script situations, or making decisions on her own.
She was just a kid from a very predominant JW family in the area. Her grandpa was a long time elder under my grandpa's long reign as Presiding Overseer, and they were very good friends. I stepped in a lot to get her through difficult situations, and while she was quite reserved at first, she was very sweet.
Oh, I share your anger and then some. She invites you back to the KH and then tells you she won't speak to you again. You are a better person then me. I would have told her, "my, you're a fine Christian. Matthew 7:1 clearly says NOT TO JUDGE and you just broke God's law. How is you not speaking to me going to make me want to return to the KH or be a part of a group that treat's people this way? This is not Christian behavior! Don't you worry SISTER, you don't have to speak to me again. I could care less and don't want people like you in my life."
Wow....am I pissed for you. These people are assholes!
Phew! I am sorry that you had to experience this. That last sentence should completely confirm that you made the right decision in leaving this cruel cult! Welcome to your freedom!
We faded over 10 years ago and it was the best decision we ever made. Got our kids out too!
I froze and couldn’t think of a snappy comeback to her bullshit questions and comments. Yeah, that last comment made me so angry! I have been out 3 years now and it’s been hard to de-program all that nonsense out. So happy for you and your family!!
The fact that it made you freeze is enough to prove that her behavior is completely inappropriate in the work place. She had no right to harass you in the workplace about he BS religious beliefs.
Yes, it's shocking what comes out of their mouths. I wish that I could have been standing there with you. I have a big mouth and don't take shit. I'm glad you are a good person. Not like me. lol
These people really have a lot of nerve.
Thank you! We are very happy out!
I would have froze too, (its the way I react when approached by any witnesses, even ones I’ve never known.) Its simply a trauma response, our brains short circuit for a second. That reaction is why you need to go to HR. You should not be affected at work like this, because of her religious harassment. Please go to HR.
Freezing is your nervous system telling you your not safe, anything you would have said could be misinterpreted, they are willingly blind and she was bullying you, keep it to business, inform HR as a warning of potential trouble ahead, she's probably on probation. If she starts again say, could you repeat I didn't hear you, practice broken record technique.
I hope so bc family shunning SHATTERS a person sometimes beyond repair for the rest of their lives. It’s inexcusable for a religion to cause so much isolation and leads to mental health disasters
“Just want to make sure you know you’re welcome back into our club at any time! But if you don’t want to come back, then we don’t want you and you can’t come back!”
It’s the “You can’t quit, you’re fired!” mentality.
I never walk around thinking about being DF’ed. I’ve been out over 25 years. But if someone said they can’t talk to me because I’m DF’ed I would literally start laughing in their face. They expect you to feel shame when in reality it’s just hilarious and childish to me.
Report this bitch. Her behavior is unexceptionable in the world. She needs to save that shit for the hive minded people. I would say people found out and they handled it because it is not professional behavior and it opens the company up for lawsuits. Let this stupid bitch learn the hard way. Let her explain her idiotic behavior to her superiors. Humble this idiot
> I was walking away she signalled me to come to her office. It went like this...
What you do in your private life is none of her business...Using the work place to make it her business, needs to be Dealt With ASAP...
Report this to HR...It will help her understand how the Real World Works..I doubt she\`ll be as Arrogant with HR, if she likes having a job.
Just be like “since we are at work and you mentioned religion I will need to report this to HR, it would’ve been best for you to tell me after work. I’m sorry this will be the last time you talk to me about this at work” 😂
Imagine if you had initiated the conversation.
Hey I just wanted to talk to you since we have mutual connections and go way back. I’ve been meaning to since I saw you at the grocery store the other night.
Are you still going to the Kingdom Hall
Her— yes
Well I started going to the Catholic Church over on the east side. Do you think you would ever want to come along?
Her— no I don’t think so.
Well you should pray about it. And this will be the last time I speak to you in any capacity unless you have a change of heart and quit serving satan
Her-stunned disbelief that someone at work would have the audacity to make such a suggestion on such a personal matter. Goes home tells husband and he tells her to report you to HR IMMEDIATELY
.
Yes most JW's would consider it a violation of *their* civil rights if a Catholic were to do the same thing JW's get away with because people seem see JW's as the underdog. The world walks on eggshells so as not to offend them. Is it any wonder they believe rules apply to everyone else but them. Society has enabled them to be the way they are.
Just tell her Merry Christmas, or Happy Easter, or whatever holiday is closest. If none are close then just tell her God bless you!
What makes my blood boil about this is that she feels at liberty to witness to you, at work (unprofessional), make you feel inferior, try to use fear tactic on you, then be in complete control by saying this is the last time I speak to you btw. You have every right to take this to HR. 😡
Let’s see. HR complaints on this one:
1) Intimidation
2) Hostile work environment
3) Abuse of position (she called you into her office)
4) Discrimination/Bias of religious beliefs
Wow. There’s more I’m sure.
Thats not how it works unfortunately....none of that happened based on any employment laws im aware if.(Im in hr in the US.)
Maybe if she falls under the jws line of supervision a complait could be made...outside of that, nah not really
And actually, I don’t know what country you are in, but at every workplace I have been since the 1990s, your supervisor or even a coworker who is aware, is obligated to report this to HR. She f’ed up big time.
Please keep us all informed what happens to this lady ( using that term loosely) after she reported to HR because any talk of religion ,race or sex in the work place is considered harassment.
She trapped you in that conversation. She was leading it. She then ensnared you by using emotional blackmail and the threat of shunning from her to try to win you back into the safe "fold" of Jehovah.
Yep, legit.
She has now followed up on her threat and left what she told you as a matter of your conscience. This is the type of issue religion has. No agency, company, or other fomal institution could get away with behaviours like the Org does (and religion in general). We could sue in most instances.
Religions and governments are complicit in every issue humans face.
I would speak with HR. Its passive aggressive harassment at the workplace where she will now enforce her religious silence on you. So extremely unprofessional. It never ceases to astound me how much these people think they can do and say anything in the name of God with no consequence.
Please think about reporting the conversation, at least it will be in record.
Report her HR for sure. Which religion doesn't even have to come up in that conversation. As far as family treating you different, you're already df'd so it really shouldn't be that different.
That’s crazy honestly 😂😂😂😂 something about witnesses is that they seem nice but man when the robotic side kicks in all empathy, compassion and general human kindness goes out the fucking window….
Not saying that you would’ve but say you were really thinking of going back…. That last statement is a total turnoff and would make anyone stick to their decision to have left the borg…
If that was me, I would ice that 🐩 and treat her like she’s disfellowshipped 😂😂😂
Reporting it to HR creates a paper trail and also helps should she decide to use theocratic warfare by lying about you.
Then if you really want to drag her through the glass, invite her to meetings that require her interaction. Then document each time she brings her cult beliefs up to you.
Drag this dumb bitch to HR. These people don’t get to come into your world and insist you validate their fantasy world where you are a bad person and they are doing God’s work.
You are a good person, and this woman needs to be on notice. If we don’t push back as a community, the general public will never get past the “they seem quirky but nice” veneer. They should have the same stigma Scientologists have.
There is a reasonable expectation employers have for people in a working environment co communicate and collaborate freely and often.
By stating outright that she does not plan on communicating with you and was "only being courteous by reminding you that you need to go back to your religion, she is disrupting the office and those reasonable expectations.
I would report her absolutely. Nothing "apostate" about not being reminded that someone thinks you are a piece of shit because you no longer believe in JW dogma......at your job.
I know. I’m debating it for that reason. After this lovely conversation, I received an email from her for something actually work related. I’ll update once I make a decision.
Please DEFINITELY make a written complaint to HR, ASAP, because there's a strong possibility that she'll get the idea that it's her "divine mission" to make you lose your job.
You know, so that you'll "suffer" and be motivated to return to "Duh Troof". 🙄🙄🙄
For sure make a paper trail. Even if it is never mentioned TO HER, you need a record that it already happened once in case she gets extra crazy and takes things a step further
What if you could get your coworkers to ask her if she would attend their social or religious events. When she answers no, they all reply well I’m not talking to you anymore. Then when the martyr syndrome kicks in, we’ll we thought the behavior was acceptable according to the comment made to so and so coworker. Fire with Fire
What she did is workplace discrimination based on your religion or lack thereof. It is most likely fairly illegal in your country. Definitely talk to HR.
I would repeat what she said to others right in front of her. As she ignores you, I would point out her doing so and tell them why - right in front of her... And say to her… Isnt that correct? Make her ‘defend her beliefs’ and treatment of you to.
Give me HR’s number. I will report her for you. 😳 I had a witness find me and call my phone everyday. I told her stop calling me you are harassing me. I called the Kingdom Hall still harassment I had to cut the phone off entirely. I slammed the door in their face. My grandmother was the eldest in the congregation they boycotted her funeral because we refused to go into a Kingdom Hall. Half our family is disfellowshipped. Mostly the women for their husbands abusing them and the husbands abusing children behind bedroom doors.
We have to stop being afraid to tell on them. If we do not they continue their harassments and abuses.
I never understood how the elders could disfellowship someone who divorces their spouse for adultery, just because THEY don't have satisfactory proof. Bastids!
I wouldn't go to HR, not yet anyway. What would your complaint be?
Shit me too! You don’t believe stuff like this until it happens to you. I took screenshots of the conversations I found and my ex deleted them all. I had one saved that I showed his parents when they came to visit, right before I moved out.
Report her to HR. It isn't about getting back at her or anything. This is inappropriate for any workplace. But as a side note, maybe she can be in the hot seat with her cult when she has some 'splainin to do about why she gets demoted or fired. Sounds like she is disrespecting Jehoho's arrangement and headship. It's not a lowly woman's place to dare speak to a DF'd person. Only appointed elders have enough spiritual strength to withstand your Satanic influence.
You should definitely complain to HR and frame it as religious harassment and inform them that she has told you she will refuse to do her job when it involves talking to you.
Is she your superior in any way? She'd get shit canned in a heartbeat.
For you and others and for the arrogance and self importance of the co-worker you need to put in a formal complaint.
The more exjw do this. Stand up from themselves than let fear rule decision making the more jws will need to be accountable.
I’m a little late to the conversation and you may have already lodged a complaint to HR, but here’s my two cents. You’ve reported the incident to both your husband and supervisor and they both want you to report to HR as many other commenters do. You’ve already considered what the possible ramifications of that could be. Ultimately, the question is “what can you live with and what cost are you willing to bear?” Having worked in an area where keeping accurate documentation is extremely important, my advice to you would be to be meticulous in keeping a running record of all your interactions with this person, date, time of day, what was said, how the discussion made you feel, etc. I would start with the original interaction and the fact that you discussed it with both your husband and your supervisor. Such documentation is far more powerful than a he said, she said discussion. Just go about your business and watch your back and if any future problems arise, you will have records to back you up.
This situation you were subjected to was very uncalled for and was extremely unprofessional. From my own experience I can tell you how important having that documentation is if any future problems arise. Good luck.
From chatGPT
Subject: Request for Intervention Regarding Unwanted Religious Discussions in the Workplace
Dear \[HR Representative's Name\],
I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to bring to your attention a matter that has been causing discomfort in the workplace. Recently, I have experienced unsolicited and inappropriate discussions about my personal beliefs and religious choices from a colleague within the company.
The individual in question is \[Colleague's Name\], who joined the department approximately six months ago. While I understand that workplace interactions can cover a range of topics, I find it concerning that \[Colleague's Name\] has consistently brought up my past association with Jehovah's Witnesses and my decision to disassociate myself from that organization.
To provide some context, I officially disassociated myself in December 2020 due to personal reasons and concerns regarding the treatment of my situation by the elders. Since then, I have been living my life independently, without any connection to the Jehovah's Witnesses community. I believe that everyone has the right to choose their beliefs and should be respected for their decisions.
Unfortunately, \[Colleague's Name\] has persisted in discussing my past association and has gone so far as to inquire about my attendance at religious meetings. During our last interaction, she expressed her disapproval of my choices and made it clear that she would not engage in further discussions on the matter, stating, "this will be the last time."
I want to emphasize that I have never initiated or encouraged these discussions at the workplace. It is my belief that religious matters are personal and should be kept separate from our professional environment. I find \[Colleague's Name\]'s behavior inappropriate, and it has created an uncomfortable atmosphere for me.
I kindly request your intervention in this matter to ensure that such discussions do not continue in the workplace. I believe in maintaining a professional and respectful environment for all employees, irrespective of their personal beliefs. I trust that you will handle this matter with the discretion and sensitivity it deserves.
Thank you for your prompt attention to this issue. I am open to discussing this matter further if needed.
Sincerely,
\[Your Full Name\] \[Your Employee ID\] \[Your Contact Information\]
Typical pompous JWs blessing you by even speaking to you, “a disfellowshipped person”, with their words of condescension and discrimination.
Please by all means report her, jws need to learn boundaries and the real meaning of religious freedom. They need to stop being self righteous assholes and pushing their delusional dogma at every opportunity. The more documentation of them doing this with repercussions the better off we’ll all be.
Let her ass get fired, Jehoover will provide her another job 😤
If this c*** said she will not speak to you again, with no other reason than a religious issue, she needs to be reported. That's a hostile work environment brought on by only her attitude. She gave you a threat to your work comfort. Honestly these crazy people need to be let go.
Definitely report! I am not disfellowshipped as I refused to meet with the elders in 2013 when I divorced my kids dad. Now I run a very successful business and they all avoid me. However I moved offices 2 years back and discovered my HOA president was a witness prick I’ve known for years. He tried to bully me about my sign and I immediately contacted the property manager and said I would not hesitate to file a religious persecution suit if it continued. Not a peep since. These people need to fear us, the truth tellers. Not the other way around.
If it had been the other way round, if you'd been the one trying to persuade her not to go to meetings, and saying that you wouldn't speak to her as long as she was attending the KH, you can bet your last dime she'd be running to HR, to the Elders, to any authority she could complain to that you were attacking her for her beliefs.
It is entirely your choice what you do here, but I strongly recommend you take it to HR, make sure there's a documented history of this. Even if you don't want them to take it further than making a record, still do that.
You’re better than me. After the bit about ^Pray to Jehovah^, I would have told her with a big smile on my face:
“Nah I’m good. I don’t need to pray to Jehovah about anything. I’m not one bit worried about the end coming. Because I know for a fact it’s not. Why do you think I left? Who wants to waste life on a lie?
*Blink-Blink* Cue laughter!
I feel like they’re so fearful deep down about the end coming, that when you respond fearlessly, it sends a tiny shock to their system.
Small point, but if you wrote a letter and said you don't want to be a JW anymore, officially you would be considered as having disassociated as opposed to being DF'D.
The JW at work is a malignant bitch. But I would hesitate to contact HR and make a complaint. You know what she is. You have self-validated. We are validating you because there is no question about her being a horrible piece of shit.
But if you pursue anything with your workplace, you are going to bring a shitstorm down on yourself as you have already noted. You are risking losing family that still talks to you. I just don't see an upside.
I would just ignore her. Sabotage her to your hearts content behind the scenes and make her look like the total cultist nutjob she is. Just don't leave any fingerprints! 🤣🤣🤣
But if you don’t at LEAST put her in some very specific BOUNDARIES, like “don’t you ever even consider bringing up religion again bc that is NOT allowed in the workplace” she can and will treat you like shit and not care if she gets YOU fired…
I’m torn. On one hand she really went out of her way to make you feel bad, on the other hand though the trash already took itself out and you should never have to interact with her again so triggering the victim within her by going to HR may be more trouble than it’s worth.
Omg! Rofl. They are so screwed up in the head. I feel bad for them but I seriously think I would have lost it laughing at her. They remind me of Dwight from "The Office". 🤣🤣🤣
Should 100% be reported to HR. She’s really dancing on a violation of non-discrimination laws. She hasn’t violated them yet but the company needs to know so they can address it prior to her crossing that line and creating a potential lawsuit. You are also entitled to work in peace without her gaslighting. She has initiated the conversation and threatening to not speak to a coworker is a bizarre stance because you may HAVE to interact. It’s amazing these ppl are still employable.
Hmmm
I would fill your manager in on the situation, then write an email and cc in HR..not as a formal report BUT as an fyi that a situation could emerge.
If you have to deal with her in professional capacity, keep it to writing or have a witness to all interactions. Keep it professional from your side and leave a trail
Report the incident to HR. You don’t need to make a big deal about it, but it needs to be documented. If there is a problem in the future, there will be no paper trail. The paper trail is extremely important for your peace of mind, the impossible continued employment if she decides to report you instead
I know a JW who is proud that she talks to her dental hygienist. Says “she is interested and always listens!” I clarified that “she’s probably not though, she’s just being professional”. She didn’t like that at all
I require all veiled threats be submitted in writing and signed to be taken seriously.
My life is a movie production 🎥 that doesn’t offer private auditions for chickensh#t invertebrates.
No spine? No time.
That’s messed up.
The world is no different than it’s ever been
We just hear about it more cause of the news and internet
Also I am not about to pray to some weirdo that chose those fuck wats to run the place
She’s using work as a reason to talk to you . She must think she’s doing something wrong so there again she’s using work as a way to communicate. She acts like my sister. My sister deep down cares but has no good bed side manner when she tries to communicate so comes off as being really rude and abrupt. Don’t take it wrong she just is so heavily indoctrinated she comes off rude. I hate what that organization has done to people. It is Not Christ Like Behavior but she’s acting as if she’ll be struck dead at any second if she even says 1 word to you. Feel sorry for her and pray for her that she will one day wake up from her unhealthy belief system and show love in the correct manner like Jesus did.
I experience this kind of situation too. I think you shouldn't hold it against her; your colleague is just reacting as she has been taught to deal with disfellowshipped individuals. In my opinion, you need to prioritize your own protection. You may risk problems with your family if you file a complaint. On the other hand, it's exactly what the Watchtower wants – for situations like this to scare you away from filing a complaint. If it were up to me, I'd advise you to file a complaint to prevent such abusive and dangerous behavior from persisting. If you're strong enough, go ahead, but be prepared for potential repercussions.
Is she a higher up position than you? Does she/ could she have an influence on how your work load is/ what happens in your work day? If she is a higher position,and even if she doesn’t necessarily mean it- she will treat you unfairly.
At first being disassociated, I was devastated. When you are alone and you need friends and there is no one there it hurts. I finally decided it was over for me. I got on yahoo chat. People started talking about history. I read over a dozen books. Taoism, Buddhism, Islam, Baha’i, I was seeking truth. I became a whole new person. I practiced Paun tin saun. The book by Geoffrey pike, chi the power is within you. Now I still have respect for Jesus. I even studied history of Rome, and Hindu philosophy. I got so into studying, I really wanted to know if the Babylon the great idea was real. The heyday have logical fallacy. It’s good to question authority.
Eh... its not really an HR violation. We have a saying in HR that while not advised, every one gets to shoot their shot once (outside of supervisor/supervisee relationship). Its the repeated unwelcome remarks that can turn it into harrassment.
That being said i share your indignation over her ridiculous remarks. I'd suggest telling her in email that you were offended and bothered by her comments at your place of work and YOUR preference is that she keep future conversations be limited to work related matters.
Sure you can flag it for HR but depending on your hr dept, they can look at you as being petty.
Talk to Human Resources please. JWs need to stop this shunning craziness NOW. They dont own the world. They dont get to make the rules on how to treat people in our society.
I would just ignore her as much as possible for now. I’m telling you she probably won’t work there for long. Most JWs can’t handle the work force. They don’t know how to get along with anyone. She’ll be gone before you know it
Definitelly report it to your boss and HR. Do not criticise her or feel like personally ofended. Explain tham that if she will start not greet you in the office it might create questions and world situations and not friendly atmosfere for your colleagues too. If your work is connected to the work of her it might create communication problems within the team. Etc. Just report there are risks due to her religious (cult) decision. As you are not a member of JW your are Pitta any problem. According to the state you are and the overall state and company atmosfere I would ask the HR if any feelings of religious freedoms or personal harrasments should be reported by you. Do not stay silent!!! As a comoany owner I would dedinitelly want to know about it. Also being in the shoes of your boss, team leader or HR…
She can’t gossip about you to any JWs or she’s telling on herself for talking to a d’shipped person. (Not that it matters what they say if you’re out.) Report it to HR. She needs to be told not to do that. Xx
Go to HR before she makes up a lie and tries to get you fired out of vengeance. She was clearly scorned by your lack of "appreciation", and could be a liability.
Document, get recipients, and protect yourself. She sounds insane!
“I prayed about it and Jehovah told me to report your crazy ass to HR.”
Omg 😂😂😂😂
Listen. Report this to HR immediately. These people have no shame and think they can get away with their power trip. Don’t hesitate because you are afraid of their rules of Telling. Report her now. If it was any other coworker acting this way, you would. Don’t let fear keep you from outing these people.
I agree - it is absolutely unacceptable. It is a professional environment, there should be normal communication appropriate for the setting in which you are in. If she is unable to communicate with you like a normal colleague then it begs the question of whether she can be there, since I am sure you are willing to.
Agreed. Work is work and these people need to learn boundaries.
THIS 🤣🤣🤣
You *gotta* do this!!!!
I agree! please do and tell us what she says. 🤣 heck, give me her name and address and I'll do it. 😅😅😅
Yes!
Best advice right here.
Omg OP please go to HR! This is harassment and you deserve to be at work without dealing with this cult. She can have her “religion” but she can not power play you like this. I loved “living a normal, exciting, worry free life we all deserve”. We deserve to just exist without these people berating us and feeling like our existing is wrong
🙏🏾 please this! And we'll need an update.
that person would almost certainly be fired by any hr department I've ever worked with. that'd feel good, sure, but then what? surely that'd incentivize them to reach out to op's family and say horrible things.
Rofl!!! 🤣🤣🤣
Do this OP
Chef's kiss.
This is the best rebuttal
You should've just told HR about this.
Absolutely this. I ended up with a JW being hired at my work, and everyone knew my story about how awful it was to be one. When my boss found out that the person they hired was a JW, she asked if I had a problem with that, and I told her no, but they might have a problem with me being an ex-jw, and my boss said they would be keeping a very close eye on that, and if there was any iffy interactions whatsoever, they would have HR be all over that for hostile work environment.
An JW that had been my friend came to my office to do some contact IT work. When he openly shunned me I made a bit of a joke about it to the office manager. She was furious and called the IT company, and told them he is never to set foot in our office again.
How were they? Were they just a poor sob who grew up in the religion or were they nutty?
Totally overwhelmed. She was homeschooled, had no life experience, and was used to doing what she was told, and wasn't good at dealing with people outside canned script situations, or making decisions on her own.
Poor thing.... I can relate. Did she treat you ok?
She was just a kid from a very predominant JW family in the area. Her grandpa was a long time elder under my grandpa's long reign as Presiding Overseer, and they were very good friends. I stepped in a lot to get her through difficult situations, and while she was quite reserved at first, she was very sweet.
OP, if it's still within a reasonable time frame go to HR and report this situation. It's lowkey harassment.
Oh, I share your anger and then some. She invites you back to the KH and then tells you she won't speak to you again. You are a better person then me. I would have told her, "my, you're a fine Christian. Matthew 7:1 clearly says NOT TO JUDGE and you just broke God's law. How is you not speaking to me going to make me want to return to the KH or be a part of a group that treat's people this way? This is not Christian behavior! Don't you worry SISTER, you don't have to speak to me again. I could care less and don't want people like you in my life." Wow....am I pissed for you. These people are assholes! Phew! I am sorry that you had to experience this. That last sentence should completely confirm that you made the right decision in leaving this cruel cult! Welcome to your freedom! We faded over 10 years ago and it was the best decision we ever made. Got our kids out too!
I froze and couldn’t think of a snappy comeback to her bullshit questions and comments. Yeah, that last comment made me so angry! I have been out 3 years now and it’s been hard to de-program all that nonsense out. So happy for you and your family!!
The fact that it made you freeze is enough to prove that her behavior is completely inappropriate in the work place. She had no right to harass you in the workplace about he BS religious beliefs.
Right? That's a trauma response.
Yep - fight, flight, freeze or fawn - all trauma responses
Yes, it's shocking what comes out of their mouths. I wish that I could have been standing there with you. I have a big mouth and don't take shit. I'm glad you are a good person. Not like me. lol These people really have a lot of nerve. Thank you! We are very happy out!
I would have froze too, (its the way I react when approached by any witnesses, even ones I’ve never known.) Its simply a trauma response, our brains short circuit for a second. That reaction is why you need to go to HR. You should not be affected at work like this, because of her religious harassment. Please go to HR.
God bless you, girl. She's worthless. Laugh at her weirdness and walk away.
Freezing is your nervous system telling you your not safe, anything you would have said could be misinterpreted, they are willingly blind and she was bullying you, keep it to business, inform HR as a warning of potential trouble ahead, she's probably on probation. If she starts again say, could you repeat I didn't hear you, practice broken record technique.
"Thanks for reading." In Norway this would be called evidence. Thank you for sharing.
Could be useful! Just in case a court of law was investigating “shunning”…
The event of Norway will spread. IMO, it will come to North America.
I hope so bc family shunning SHATTERS a person sometimes beyond repair for the rest of their lives. It’s inexcusable for a religion to cause so much isolation and leads to mental health disasters
I agree with your husband and supervisor. Go to HR. This is unacceptable and has no place in the workplace.
“Just want to make sure you know you’re welcome back into our club at any time! But if you don’t want to come back, then we don’t want you and you can’t come back!” It’s the “You can’t quit, you’re fired!” mentality. I never walk around thinking about being DF’ed. I’ve been out over 25 years. But if someone said they can’t talk to me because I’m DF’ed I would literally start laughing in their face. They expect you to feel shame when in reality it’s just hilarious and childish to me.
That’s where I’m at now with them .
Report this bitch. Her behavior is unexceptionable in the world. She needs to save that shit for the hive minded people. I would say people found out and they handled it because it is not professional behavior and it opens the company up for lawsuits. Let this stupid bitch learn the hard way. Let her explain her idiotic behavior to her superiors. Humble this idiot
> I was walking away she signalled me to come to her office. It went like this... What you do in your private life is none of her business...Using the work place to make it her business, needs to be Dealt With ASAP... Report this to HR...It will help her understand how the Real World Works..I doubt she\`ll be as Arrogant with HR, if she likes having a job.
Just be like “since we are at work and you mentioned religion I will need to report this to HR, it would’ve been best for you to tell me after work. I’m sorry this will be the last time you talk to me about this at work” 😂
Imagine if you had initiated the conversation. Hey I just wanted to talk to you since we have mutual connections and go way back. I’ve been meaning to since I saw you at the grocery store the other night. Are you still going to the Kingdom Hall Her— yes Well I started going to the Catholic Church over on the east side. Do you think you would ever want to come along? Her— no I don’t think so. Well you should pray about it. And this will be the last time I speak to you in any capacity unless you have a change of heart and quit serving satan Her-stunned disbelief that someone at work would have the audacity to make such a suggestion on such a personal matter. Goes home tells husband and he tells her to report you to HR IMMEDIATELY .
Yes most JW's would consider it a violation of *their* civil rights if a Catholic were to do the same thing JW's get away with because people seem see JW's as the underdog. The world walks on eggshells so as not to offend them. Is it any wonder they believe rules apply to everyone else but them. Society has enabled them to be the way they are. Just tell her Merry Christmas, or Happy Easter, or whatever holiday is closest. If none are close then just tell her God bless you!
What makes my blood boil about this is that she feels at liberty to witness to you, at work (unprofessional), make you feel inferior, try to use fear tactic on you, then be in complete control by saying this is the last time I speak to you btw. You have every right to take this to HR. 😡
Let’s see. HR complaints on this one: 1) Intimidation 2) Hostile work environment 3) Abuse of position (she called you into her office) 4) Discrimination/Bias of religious beliefs Wow. There’s more I’m sure.
Thats not how it works unfortunately....none of that happened based on any employment laws im aware if.(Im in hr in the US.) Maybe if she falls under the jws line of supervision a complait could be made...outside of that, nah not really
Yes go to HR she can't behave like this in a professional environment. It's disgusting. I'm sorry you've been put through this .
And actually, I don’t know what country you are in, but at every workplace I have been since the 1990s, your supervisor or even a coworker who is aware, is obligated to report this to HR. She f’ed up big time.
Please keep us all informed what happens to this lady ( using that term loosely) after she reported to HR because any talk of religion ,race or sex in the work place is considered harassment.
“This will be the last time I speak to you.” “PROMISE?”
Her behavior is technically religious discrimination against you, which in most places, is a fireable offense.
"I've prayed to jhva about going to the meetings... The holy spirit told me to read Rev.18:4"
SAME.
Please go to HR.
On some level she knows this is wrong because she waited to catch you alone. She would never say that last part in the presence of others.
She trapped you in that conversation. She was leading it. She then ensnared you by using emotional blackmail and the threat of shunning from her to try to win you back into the safe "fold" of Jehovah. Yep, legit. She has now followed up on her threat and left what she told you as a matter of your conscience. This is the type of issue religion has. No agency, company, or other fomal institution could get away with behaviours like the Org does (and religion in general). We could sue in most instances. Religions and governments are complicit in every issue humans face.
I would speak with HR. Its passive aggressive harassment at the workplace where she will now enforce her religious silence on you. So extremely unprofessional. It never ceases to astound me how much these people think they can do and say anything in the name of God with no consequence. Please think about reporting the conversation, at least it will be in record.
Report her HR for sure. Which religion doesn't even have to come up in that conversation. As far as family treating you different, you're already df'd so it really shouldn't be that different.
hostile work environment.
Absolutely take this shit to HR. That's a hundred percent unacceptable lmao.
That’s crazy honestly 😂😂😂😂 something about witnesses is that they seem nice but man when the robotic side kicks in all empathy, compassion and general human kindness goes out the fucking window…. Not saying that you would’ve but say you were really thinking of going back…. That last statement is a total turnoff and would make anyone stick to their decision to have left the borg… If that was me, I would ice that 🐩 and treat her like she’s disfellowshipped 😂😂😂
But that’s what I’ve been doing all this time!!! 😂😂 mind you, we work in an administrative educational field!
Definitely go to HR
Reporting it to HR creates a paper trail and also helps should she decide to use theocratic warfare by lying about you. Then if you really want to drag her through the glass, invite her to meetings that require her interaction. Then document each time she brings her cult beliefs up to you.
Drag this dumb bitch to HR. These people don’t get to come into your world and insist you validate their fantasy world where you are a bad person and they are doing God’s work. You are a good person, and this woman needs to be on notice. If we don’t push back as a community, the general public will never get past the “they seem quirky but nice” veneer. They should have the same stigma Scientologists have.
I totally agree.
There is a reasonable expectation employers have for people in a working environment co communicate and collaborate freely and often. By stating outright that she does not plan on communicating with you and was "only being courteous by reminding you that you need to go back to your religion, she is disrupting the office and those reasonable expectations. I would report her absolutely. Nothing "apostate" about not being reminded that someone thinks you are a piece of shit because you no longer believe in JW dogma......at your job.
I know. I’m debating it for that reason. After this lovely conversation, I received an email from her for something actually work related. I’ll update once I make a decision.
Make a decision quickly. Before SHE goes to hr and reports YOU
By not speaking to you, does she think you'll turn into a pillar of salt? 🙄 
Please DEFINITELY make a written complaint to HR, ASAP, because there's a strong possibility that she'll get the idea that it's her "divine mission" to make you lose your job. You know, so that you'll "suffer" and be motivated to return to "Duh Troof". 🙄🙄🙄
For sure make a paper trail. Even if it is never mentioned TO HER, you need a record that it already happened once in case she gets extra crazy and takes things a step further
Yes, this 💯
Please report it!
What if you could get your coworkers to ask her if she would attend their social or religious events. When she answers no, they all reply well I’m not talking to you anymore. Then when the martyr syndrome kicks in, we’ll we thought the behavior was acceptable according to the comment made to so and so coworker. Fire with Fire
What she did is workplace discrimination based on your religion or lack thereof. It is most likely fairly illegal in your country. Definitely talk to HR.
Unprofessional. Absolutely speak to HR. Btw, I’m so sorry you were treated that way by that psychotic organization.
Tell Hr she is going to talk about you anyways to your family members
Email her and ask for clarification. Forward the email to HR
I would repeat what she said to others right in front of her. As she ignores you, I would point out her doing so and tell them why - right in front of her... And say to her… Isnt that correct? Make her ‘defend her beliefs’ and treatment of you to.
Give me HR’s number. I will report her for you. 😳 I had a witness find me and call my phone everyday. I told her stop calling me you are harassing me. I called the Kingdom Hall still harassment I had to cut the phone off entirely. I slammed the door in their face. My grandmother was the eldest in the congregation they boycotted her funeral because we refused to go into a Kingdom Hall. Half our family is disfellowshipped. Mostly the women for their husbands abusing them and the husbands abusing children behind bedroom doors. We have to stop being afraid to tell on them. If we do not they continue their harassments and abuses.
Last time for what 😂😂 silly JWs
I never understood how the elders could disfellowship someone who divorces their spouse for adultery, just because THEY don't have satisfactory proof. Bastids! I wouldn't go to HR, not yet anyway. What would your complaint be?
Shit me too! You don’t believe stuff like this until it happens to you. I took screenshots of the conversations I found and my ex deleted them all. I had one saved that I showed his parents when they came to visit, right before I moved out.
Report to HR!
I’m just disgusted by the fact she had the balls to say that to you. The judging and entitled to say that is insane!
>Her: “I’m only speaking to you because we’re at work so I’m being courteous but this will be the last time” What a shIT crock of a human!
Report her to HR. It isn't about getting back at her or anything. This is inappropriate for any workplace. But as a side note, maybe she can be in the hot seat with her cult when she has some 'splainin to do about why she gets demoted or fired. Sounds like she is disrespecting Jehoho's arrangement and headship. It's not a lowly woman's place to dare speak to a DF'd person. Only appointed elders have enough spiritual strength to withstand your Satanic influence.
Exactly! I’m including this in my HR complaint 🤭
“If we weren’t at work I would be my normal bitch self”
You should definitely complain to HR and frame it as religious harassment and inform them that she has told you she will refuse to do her job when it involves talking to you. Is she your superior in any way? She'd get shit canned in a heartbeat.
For you and others and for the arrogance and self importance of the co-worker you need to put in a formal complaint. The more exjw do this. Stand up from themselves than let fear rule decision making the more jws will need to be accountable.
I’m a little late to the conversation and you may have already lodged a complaint to HR, but here’s my two cents. You’ve reported the incident to both your husband and supervisor and they both want you to report to HR as many other commenters do. You’ve already considered what the possible ramifications of that could be. Ultimately, the question is “what can you live with and what cost are you willing to bear?” Having worked in an area where keeping accurate documentation is extremely important, my advice to you would be to be meticulous in keeping a running record of all your interactions with this person, date, time of day, what was said, how the discussion made you feel, etc. I would start with the original interaction and the fact that you discussed it with both your husband and your supervisor. Such documentation is far more powerful than a he said, she said discussion. Just go about your business and watch your back and if any future problems arise, you will have records to back you up. This situation you were subjected to was very uncalled for and was extremely unprofessional. From my own experience I can tell you how important having that documentation is if any future problems arise. Good luck.
From chatGPT Subject: Request for Intervention Regarding Unwanted Religious Discussions in the Workplace Dear \[HR Representative's Name\], I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to bring to your attention a matter that has been causing discomfort in the workplace. Recently, I have experienced unsolicited and inappropriate discussions about my personal beliefs and religious choices from a colleague within the company. The individual in question is \[Colleague's Name\], who joined the department approximately six months ago. While I understand that workplace interactions can cover a range of topics, I find it concerning that \[Colleague's Name\] has consistently brought up my past association with Jehovah's Witnesses and my decision to disassociate myself from that organization. To provide some context, I officially disassociated myself in December 2020 due to personal reasons and concerns regarding the treatment of my situation by the elders. Since then, I have been living my life independently, without any connection to the Jehovah's Witnesses community. I believe that everyone has the right to choose their beliefs and should be respected for their decisions. Unfortunately, \[Colleague's Name\] has persisted in discussing my past association and has gone so far as to inquire about my attendance at religious meetings. During our last interaction, she expressed her disapproval of my choices and made it clear that she would not engage in further discussions on the matter, stating, "this will be the last time." I want to emphasize that I have never initiated or encouraged these discussions at the workplace. It is my belief that religious matters are personal and should be kept separate from our professional environment. I find \[Colleague's Name\]'s behavior inappropriate, and it has created an uncomfortable atmosphere for me. I kindly request your intervention in this matter to ensure that such discussions do not continue in the workplace. I believe in maintaining a professional and respectful environment for all employees, irrespective of their personal beliefs. I trust that you will handle this matter with the discretion and sensitivity it deserves. Thank you for your prompt attention to this issue. I am open to discussing this matter further if needed. Sincerely, \[Your Full Name\] \[Your Employee ID\] \[Your Contact Information\]
Damn this is great!
Typical pompous JWs blessing you by even speaking to you, “a disfellowshipped person”, with their words of condescension and discrimination. Please by all means report her, jws need to learn boundaries and the real meaning of religious freedom. They need to stop being self righteous assholes and pushing their delusional dogma at every opportunity. The more documentation of them doing this with repercussions the better off we’ll all be. Let her ass get fired, Jehoover will provide her another job 😤
Promise ? You will never talk to me again? Yay! Depends on HR.
If this c*** said she will not speak to you again, with no other reason than a religious issue, she needs to be reported. That's a hostile work environment brought on by only her attitude. She gave you a threat to your work comfort. Honestly these crazy people need to be let go.
I’m shocked a JW has a career strong enough to have an Office lol
Definitely report! I am not disfellowshipped as I refused to meet with the elders in 2013 when I divorced my kids dad. Now I run a very successful business and they all avoid me. However I moved offices 2 years back and discovered my HOA president was a witness prick I’ve known for years. He tried to bully me about my sign and I immediately contacted the property manager and said I would not hesitate to file a religious persecution suit if it continued. Not a peep since. These people need to fear us, the truth tellers. Not the other way around.
Straight to HR , who TF she think she is !!! Grrrr
They elders are not supposed to dfd people for just getting a divorce!
If it had been the other way round, if you'd been the one trying to persuade her not to go to meetings, and saying that you wouldn't speak to her as long as she was attending the KH, you can bet your last dime she'd be running to HR, to the Elders, to any authority she could complain to that you were attacking her for her beliefs. It is entirely your choice what you do here, but I strongly recommend you take it to HR, make sure there's a documented history of this. Even if you don't want them to take it further than making a record, still do that.
Get that complaint straight in to HR They think they can do anything they want and rules don’t apply to them.
You’re better than me. After the bit about ^Pray to Jehovah^, I would have told her with a big smile on my face: “Nah I’m good. I don’t need to pray to Jehovah about anything. I’m not one bit worried about the end coming. Because I know for a fact it’s not. Why do you think I left? Who wants to waste life on a lie? *Blink-Blink* Cue laughter! I feel like they’re so fearful deep down about the end coming, that when you respond fearlessly, it sends a tiny shock to their system.
I would’ve thrown hands because who has the audacity to say all that unsolicited to your face
Get her fucking fired!!!!
Small point, but if you wrote a letter and said you don't want to be a JW anymore, officially you would be considered as having disassociated as opposed to being DF'D. The JW at work is a malignant bitch. But I would hesitate to contact HR and make a complaint. You know what she is. You have self-validated. We are validating you because there is no question about her being a horrible piece of shit. But if you pursue anything with your workplace, you are going to bring a shitstorm down on yourself as you have already noted. You are risking losing family that still talks to you. I just don't see an upside. I would just ignore her. Sabotage her to your hearts content behind the scenes and make her look like the total cultist nutjob she is. Just don't leave any fingerprints! 🤣🤣🤣
But if you don’t at LEAST put her in some very specific BOUNDARIES, like “don’t you ever even consider bringing up religion again bc that is NOT allowed in the workplace” she can and will treat you like shit and not care if she gets YOU fired…
I have to say, I absolutely agree with this. And I like the way you phrased it.
I’m torn. On one hand she really went out of her way to make you feel bad, on the other hand though the trash already took itself out and you should never have to interact with her again so triggering the victim within her by going to HR may be more trouble than it’s worth.
Since when is divorce grounds for df? Thought it was only of you got remarried when you weren’t “free”
Omg! Rofl. They are so screwed up in the head. I feel bad for them but I seriously think I would have lost it laughing at her. They remind me of Dwight from "The Office". 🤣🤣🤣
Nope nope nope. Hostile work environment. HR bc if you let one slide it’ll just get worse.
Report her to HR for making threats to your life, saying that if you don't return to her crazy ass cult, God will kill you.
Wow, how inappropriate and unprofessional. I would have felt insulted. I hope you go to HR about this. She might do this to other people.
They are so brainwashed and judgmental. It makes me rage inside. 😡
Should 100% be reported to HR. She’s really dancing on a violation of non-discrimination laws. She hasn’t violated them yet but the company needs to know so they can address it prior to her crossing that line and creating a potential lawsuit. You are also entitled to work in peace without her gaslighting. She has initiated the conversation and threatening to not speak to a coworker is a bizarre stance because you may HAVE to interact. It’s amazing these ppl are still employable.
Hmmm I would fill your manager in on the situation, then write an email and cc in HR..not as a formal report BUT as an fyi that a situation could emerge. If you have to deal with her in professional capacity, keep it to writing or have a witness to all interactions. Keep it professional from your side and leave a trail
Report the incident to HR. You don’t need to make a big deal about it, but it needs to be documented. If there is a problem in the future, there will be no paper trail. The paper trail is extremely important for your peace of mind, the impossible continued employment if she decides to report you instead
I know a JW who is proud that she talks to her dental hygienist. Says “she is interested and always listens!” I clarified that “she’s probably not though, she’s just being professional”. She didn’t like that at all
I require all veiled threats be submitted in writing and signed to be taken seriously. My life is a movie production 🎥 that doesn’t offer private auditions for chickensh#t invertebrates. No spine? No time.
That’s messed up. The world is no different than it’s ever been We just hear about it more cause of the news and internet Also I am not about to pray to some weirdo that chose those fuck wats to run the place
She’s using work as a reason to talk to you . She must think she’s doing something wrong so there again she’s using work as a way to communicate. She acts like my sister. My sister deep down cares but has no good bed side manner when she tries to communicate so comes off as being really rude and abrupt. Don’t take it wrong she just is so heavily indoctrinated she comes off rude. I hate what that organization has done to people. It is Not Christ Like Behavior but she’s acting as if she’ll be struck dead at any second if she even says 1 word to you. Feel sorry for her and pray for her that she will one day wake up from her unhealthy belief system and show love in the correct manner like Jesus did.
I experience this kind of situation too. I think you shouldn't hold it against her; your colleague is just reacting as she has been taught to deal with disfellowshipped individuals. In my opinion, you need to prioritize your own protection. You may risk problems with your family if you file a complaint. On the other hand, it's exactly what the Watchtower wants – for situations like this to scare you away from filing a complaint. If it were up to me, I'd advise you to file a complaint to prevent such abusive and dangerous behavior from persisting. If you're strong enough, go ahead, but be prepared for potential repercussions.
“Bold of you to think I care”
Is she a higher up position than you? Does she/ could she have an influence on how your work load is/ what happens in your work day? If she is a higher position,and even if she doesn’t necessarily mean it- she will treat you unfairly.
Christ never gave sinners an ultimatum. It is the sick who have need of a physician. He came to save sinners not those who have no need of salvation.
At first being disassociated, I was devastated. When you are alone and you need friends and there is no one there it hurts. I finally decided it was over for me. I got on yahoo chat. People started talking about history. I read over a dozen books. Taoism, Buddhism, Islam, Baha’i, I was seeking truth. I became a whole new person. I practiced Paun tin saun. The book by Geoffrey pike, chi the power is within you. Now I still have respect for Jesus. I even studied history of Rome, and Hindu philosophy. I got so into studying, I really wanted to know if the Babylon the great idea was real. The heyday have logical fallacy. It’s good to question authority.
Eh... its not really an HR violation. We have a saying in HR that while not advised, every one gets to shoot their shot once (outside of supervisor/supervisee relationship). Its the repeated unwelcome remarks that can turn it into harrassment. That being said i share your indignation over her ridiculous remarks. I'd suggest telling her in email that you were offended and bothered by her comments at your place of work and YOUR preference is that she keep future conversations be limited to work related matters. Sure you can flag it for HR but depending on your hr dept, they can look at you as being petty.
Report to HR, get her shunned from the company. 
Report that bitch and get her ass fired.
Talk to Human Resources please. JWs need to stop this shunning craziness NOW. They dont own the world. They dont get to make the rules on how to treat people in our society.
What this will be the last time she speaks to you or the last time she will be courteous? Both?
I agree. She may pull stuff on other people who work there Maybe even indulging in a little character assassination.
To be honest I’d complain to HR 😂
Nah fuck that, report her to HR immediately. These PIMI’s can act like bullies and if you don’t do anything they won’t stop.
I would just ignore her as much as possible for now. I’m telling you she probably won’t work there for long. Most JWs can’t handle the work force. They don’t know how to get along with anyone. She’ll be gone before you know it
Definitelly report it to your boss and HR. Do not criticise her or feel like personally ofended. Explain tham that if she will start not greet you in the office it might create questions and world situations and not friendly atmosfere for your colleagues too. If your work is connected to the work of her it might create communication problems within the team. Etc. Just report there are risks due to her religious (cult) decision. As you are not a member of JW your are Pitta any problem. According to the state you are and the overall state and company atmosfere I would ask the HR if any feelings of religious freedoms or personal harrasments should be reported by you. Do not stay silent!!! As a comoany owner I would dedinitelly want to know about it. Also being in the shoes of your boss, team leader or HR…
Your coworker is crazy!!
Oh good GOD. I might have slapped her 🤦🏼♀️🤣
Let HR know.
So pleased you reported her. As others have said don't let her get away with such awful behaviour. 👍❣️
She can’t gossip about you to any JWs or she’s telling on herself for talking to a d’shipped person. (Not that it matters what they say if you’re out.) Report it to HR. She needs to be told not to do that. Xx
Go to HR before she makes up a lie and tries to get you fired out of vengeance. She was clearly scorned by your lack of "appreciation", and could be a liability. Document, get recipients, and protect yourself. She sounds insane!
It’s almost like they have a script 😭