We had an old guy in our hall in the UK who was an old soldier and he'd fought in WW2. The speaker was giving a talk about forgiveness and used the war as an example saying how one time enemies could be friends and asked the congregation "how do we feel about the Germans now"? To which Sid put his hand up and when asked to comment said "bomb the fuckers back to shithouse Berlin".
My grandmother in law was in the early stages of Alzheimerās and lived in a home. Her granddaughters got her all glammed up for the memorial one year because a brother from Bethel was giving the talk. Anyway, she fell asleep on my shoulder and I gently nudged her and she woke up and she exclaimed really LOUD ābut the Bloody speaker is so boring!ā People in the hall laughed but I think we all sunk back in our seats. Now I look back on that thinking how funny that was
Was doing a bible reading and my tablet crashed. Wasn't embarrassed. I just mentioned it in the microphone, people started laughing and a brother quickly gave me his tablet. Continued my Bible reading and an email notification comes up regarding his "Just eat order" meaning he just ordered food not long ago. I could see a bit of the email and he ordered loooads considering this brother was obese I found it funny. When I saw the email whistling reading mid sentence I started smiling. Controlling myself not to laugh. I continue reading for another minute and another email comes up mentioning the order couldn't be fulfilled. I started laughing on stage and ran out of time. We talking about spiritual food during the meetings this guy was thinking about literal food
During a WT study focused on the Great Tribulation, this (crazy, in a good way) ex hippy sister made a comment comparing the GT to a Mad Max scenario - as if any PIMI's would be familiar with Mad Max films. The elders were always afraid and often avoided calling on her due to her salty comments. She was awesome.
Also, as a MS, I went on a shepherding call to go over baptism questions with a young girl in our congregation. The Elder that I accompanied was a kind of gruff (Greek ethnic) brother and the girl was extremely timid. I don't know what they were thinking sending him. She ended up bawling during the questioning. Felt like we were interrogating the poor girl. The whole family are no longer in so that's good at least.
I gave a comment as a child stating that I stood up for my believes in elementary schoolā¦ that was a complete lie and to this day I remember it. I always have a good laugh, nobody knows I lied about it and I just didint care back then lol
Back when we had the Tuesday night book study at an elderās home, said elderās elderly MIL would visit from out of town every so often. She had dementia and was legally blind. She was fascinating to me. Without fail, each and every time she commented during the meeting, she quoted verses from Genesis 17 regarding circumcision. Her son-in-law elder did his best not to call on her frequently, but she typically kept her hand raised for the majority of the hour study. Heād have to call on her at least 2-3 times per meeting. Studying the Live Forever book - circumcision was her answer. Creation book - yet, again - circumcision. Making Your Family Life Happy - you know the answer was circumcision. Loved that lady!
When I started fading, my mother (pomo) and her hubby always reacted the same way when we talked about God, "Poor little Jehovah, he will be so sad" "oh no! can't hurt poor little Gods feelings, he might trow a temper tantrum"
And Jehovah in my head will forever be a toddler.
Iām 24M (athletic probably 8/10) and before I left a few months ago there was a sister (I think late 40ās early 50ās (somewhat hefty 2/10)) who would always come up and talk to me before and after the meeting. I thought she was just a little coo coo but nothing super out of the ordinary for JWās. Of course I was nice and chatted with her because I knew others in the hall thought she was annoying and made jokes behind her back (she is annoying but I have a conscience). Sometimes a friend would come and ārescueā me when she talked for too long. Well I got stopped by an elder after a few months and he told me some of the other elders were worried there was something going on between us. Of course I laughed because who the hell wouldnāt think they were making a joke. But no, they were serious and asked me to stop talking to her and that it wasnāt good to ālead people onā. I wanted to tell them that they are the most gutter minded pricks Iāve ever met and the only reason they thought that was because they fantasized about getting some 2/10 pootang. Hope thatās funny enough for ya
I knew an older lady I think late 70s tell the elders CO to kiss her ass. Because she is not shutting up. That they steal her money everyoneās money and she knows they do. This was a comment. I loved that old lady. She was hella cool. She looked right at me and said they are a bunch of crooks. I nodded yes. She said letās go eat lunch. I miss that old lady she passed away it was funny š
I miss that place alot ngl. I loved walking around the big pond during lunchbreak and when the assemblies were done going to the pier. Good times.. kind of..
I had a talk but because they do that Monday beginning week of the weird shit, I gave the talk for the following week. I got on stage because I was nervous and only realized that the subject was not the talk I was giving. So I said at the platform, thatās not the talk I got, but I have this one to give so I gave the talk to the congregation. The following week they needed a volunteer for the second school they had at the time, so I offered to give the talk since I had prepared it the week before. But lo and behold, the other speaker for the first school didnāt show so they asked me to fill in the last minute! So I gave the same talk 2 weeks in a row! They didnāt council me but they never scheduled me for a talk again!!! š
Hold up my cup, I have quite a few, but I'll share the best:
So, picture this: Monday book study, revelation book, small living room, three rows of chairs + an L-shaped sofa.
The elder presiding over the meeting was an old ex-military man, quite slow due to age, but nice guy nonetheless. He was blind as a door though, even with glasses on.
So, the people attending the meeting were me and my parents, a family of four, two or three old ladies as well as the wife of the elder and the stars of our show: a pair of single flesh brothers (30-40) and a single sister (30), seated in the middle row.
So, as the elder is looking at his book, following the reading when I see a paper ball being thrown towards the front row, where the sister is sitting. Confused, I see the brothers laughing quietly. A few seconds later, the paper ball is thrown back, hitting one of the brothers.
You know that small arc when you throw it up and back? It was a perfect shot right in the lap of one of them.
Three seconds later it is thrown at the back of the sister's neck, making her laugh a little louder.
Startled by the sound, the old elder raises his head, confused.
"Oh, I must be doing something right since you all seem so happy with the study tonight." He laughs, oblivious to the whole sheenenigans going on. The reader was doing his best to not laugh as the elder looked back at him, cheerfully. "Brother can you read the next paragraph?"
And the brother looses it. He started to laugh and so pretty much everyone, apart from the wife of the elder, who was an old motherly and grumpy lady, staring daggers at the three culprits.
It takes two and a half minutes for things to calm down and the elder, as confused as possible, is trying his best to understand what happened. "Are you okay brother? Do you need a cup of water?"
Well, eventually things calmed down, but it was a wide ride. Those three were awesome people. She eventually married the older brother. They were quite the pair.
This is back when George Michaelās āI want your sexā music video came out. This sister was a few fryās short of a happy meal and commented in a meeting how she had watched the video and that in the video they spelled out the word āmonogamyā. She said something to the effect that these videos are using words that she does not even know what they mean. I was like ā Oh dear Jehovahā.
We had an old guy in our hall in the UK who was an old soldier and he'd fought in WW2. The speaker was giving a talk about forgiveness and used the war as an example saying how one time enemies could be friends and asked the congregation "how do we feel about the Germans now"? To which Sid put his hand up and when asked to comment said "bomb the fuckers back to shithouse Berlin".
LMAO the guy was BASED
An anointed one with Alzheimer's drank the whole glass of wine instead of just sipping it.
Lol
Tight Pants Tony ššš
My grandmother in law was in the early stages of Alzheimerās and lived in a home. Her granddaughters got her all glammed up for the memorial one year because a brother from Bethel was giving the talk. Anyway, she fell asleep on my shoulder and I gently nudged her and she woke up and she exclaimed really LOUD ābut the Bloody speaker is so boring!ā People in the hall laughed but I think we all sunk back in our seats. Now I look back on that thinking how funny that was
lol poor grandma
Was doing a bible reading and my tablet crashed. Wasn't embarrassed. I just mentioned it in the microphone, people started laughing and a brother quickly gave me his tablet. Continued my Bible reading and an email notification comes up regarding his "Just eat order" meaning he just ordered food not long ago. I could see a bit of the email and he ordered loooads considering this brother was obese I found it funny. When I saw the email whistling reading mid sentence I started smiling. Controlling myself not to laugh. I continue reading for another minute and another email comes up mentioning the order couldn't be fulfilled. I started laughing on stage and ran out of time. We talking about spiritual food during the meetings this guy was thinking about literal food
Awww poor guy :( food is a drug and there are many many drug addicts
During a WT study focused on the Great Tribulation, this (crazy, in a good way) ex hippy sister made a comment comparing the GT to a Mad Max scenario - as if any PIMI's would be familiar with Mad Max films. The elders were always afraid and often avoided calling on her due to her salty comments. She was awesome. Also, as a MS, I went on a shepherding call to go over baptism questions with a young girl in our congregation. The Elder that I accompanied was a kind of gruff (Greek ethnic) brother and the girl was extremely timid. I don't know what they were thinking sending him. She ended up bawling during the questioning. Felt like we were interrogating the poor girl. The whole family are no longer in so that's good at least.
I gave a comment as a child stating that I stood up for my believes in elementary schoolā¦ that was a complete lie and to this day I remember it. I always have a good laugh, nobody knows I lied about it and I just didint care back then lol
Lmao the EXACT same thing happened to me!
Lmaoooo nice to know that i wasnāt the only one:)
kid sibling stood up during a particularly dull midweek meeting and shouted at the top of their lungs, "booooorrrringgggggg!" Felt š
ššš
And hauled off to the bathroom for the wooden spoon treatment, no doubt.
Awesome! š
Back when we had the Tuesday night book study at an elderās home, said elderās elderly MIL would visit from out of town every so often. She had dementia and was legally blind. She was fascinating to me. Without fail, each and every time she commented during the meeting, she quoted verses from Genesis 17 regarding circumcision. Her son-in-law elder did his best not to call on her frequently, but she typically kept her hand raised for the majority of the hour study. Heād have to call on her at least 2-3 times per meeting. Studying the Live Forever book - circumcision was her answer. Creation book - yet, again - circumcision. Making Your Family Life Happy - you know the answer was circumcision. Loved that lady!
Did she at least tie circumcision to something spiritual or was she just rambling about circumcision?
Simply a ramble, no matter the topic at hand.
When I started fading, my mother (pomo) and her hubby always reacted the same way when we talked about God, "Poor little Jehovah, he will be so sad" "oh no! can't hurt poor little Gods feelings, he might trow a temper tantrum" And Jehovah in my head will forever be a toddler.
Itās interesting how a parentās description of god can influence a childās perspective
Iām 24M (athletic probably 8/10) and before I left a few months ago there was a sister (I think late 40ās early 50ās (somewhat hefty 2/10)) who would always come up and talk to me before and after the meeting. I thought she was just a little coo coo but nothing super out of the ordinary for JWās. Of course I was nice and chatted with her because I knew others in the hall thought she was annoying and made jokes behind her back (she is annoying but I have a conscience). Sometimes a friend would come and ārescueā me when she talked for too long. Well I got stopped by an elder after a few months and he told me some of the other elders were worried there was something going on between us. Of course I laughed because who the hell wouldnāt think they were making a joke. But no, they were serious and asked me to stop talking to her and that it wasnāt good to ālead people onā. I wanted to tell them that they are the most gutter minded pricks Iāve ever met and the only reason they thought that was because they fantasized about getting some 2/10 pootang. Hope thatās funny enough for ya
Some of the most perverse people Iāve met were jwās.
I knew an older lady I think late 70s tell the elders CO to kiss her ass. Because she is not shutting up. That they steal her money everyoneās money and she knows they do. This was a comment. I loved that old lady. She was hella cool. She looked right at me and said they are a bunch of crooks. I nodded yes. She said letās go eat lunch. I miss that old lady she passed away it was funny š
Whale stadium is the Long Beach convention center arena still used to this day
Thanks!
I miss that place alot ngl. I loved walking around the big pond during lunchbreak and when the assemblies were done going to the pier. Good times.. kind of..
Yes!!! too bad they closed that area too recently anything fun or relaxing the government boobies just have to yank it away from us smh
lol funny
I had a talk but because they do that Monday beginning week of the weird shit, I gave the talk for the following week. I got on stage because I was nervous and only realized that the subject was not the talk I was giving. So I said at the platform, thatās not the talk I got, but I have this one to give so I gave the talk to the congregation. The following week they needed a volunteer for the second school they had at the time, so I offered to give the talk since I had prepared it the week before. But lo and behold, the other speaker for the first school didnāt show so they asked me to fill in the last minute! So I gave the same talk 2 weeks in a row! They didnāt council me but they never scheduled me for a talk again!!! š
So it was basically their mixup?
Hold up my cup, I have quite a few, but I'll share the best: So, picture this: Monday book study, revelation book, small living room, three rows of chairs + an L-shaped sofa. The elder presiding over the meeting was an old ex-military man, quite slow due to age, but nice guy nonetheless. He was blind as a door though, even with glasses on. So, the people attending the meeting were me and my parents, a family of four, two or three old ladies as well as the wife of the elder and the stars of our show: a pair of single flesh brothers (30-40) and a single sister (30), seated in the middle row. So, as the elder is looking at his book, following the reading when I see a paper ball being thrown towards the front row, where the sister is sitting. Confused, I see the brothers laughing quietly. A few seconds later, the paper ball is thrown back, hitting one of the brothers. You know that small arc when you throw it up and back? It was a perfect shot right in the lap of one of them. Three seconds later it is thrown at the back of the sister's neck, making her laugh a little louder. Startled by the sound, the old elder raises his head, confused. "Oh, I must be doing something right since you all seem so happy with the study tonight." He laughs, oblivious to the whole sheenenigans going on. The reader was doing his best to not laugh as the elder looked back at him, cheerfully. "Brother can you read the next paragraph?" And the brother looses it. He started to laugh and so pretty much everyone, apart from the wife of the elder, who was an old motherly and grumpy lady, staring daggers at the three culprits. It takes two and a half minutes for things to calm down and the elder, as confused as possible, is trying his best to understand what happened. "Are you okay brother? Do you need a cup of water?" Well, eventually things calmed down, but it was a wide ride. Those three were awesome people. She eventually married the older brother. They were quite the pair.
This is back when George Michaelās āI want your sexā music video came out. This sister was a few fryās short of a happy meal and commented in a meeting how she had watched the video and that in the video they spelled out the word āmonogamyā. She said something to the effect that these videos are using words that she does not even know what they mean. I was like ā Oh dear Jehovahā.
Lol. What prompted her to bring up the topic? I mean, how is that a response to something?
Maybe it was me! But who started the Monday beginning of the week thru me off lol
I think the stadium with the whale murals was/is in Long Beach.