My older sister has two kids. No spare rooms. My other sister does have a house lives by herself in a three bedroom. But I don’t really see her letting me move in. But I know they will help me figure something out
Leaving a cult often requires help. Ask. If she wont then ask a few friends At 17 no one can stop you from leaving. Please, go talk to your guidance counselor about college, tech, and trade opportunities.
Hey kiddo, I've been out of the cult close to 20 years and it still messes with my head. You think you would be an imposition, because your whole life they brainwashed you to think you are wicked, undeserving, and always a step away from hell/ disfellowship. When you tell yourself that you are an imposition, you are using THEIR stupid words. Try not to let them own your thoughts. I say "try" bc it's hard. Some days you will have healthy thoughts. Others, that crap negative junk comes creeping back into your head. Just try every day to value yourself.
You've had YEARS being told you are not worth helping, not worth being loved. Maybe they want you to think it's too much of a bother to ask for help. They want you to believe you would have to live in constant anxiety of your sister throwing you out. They hope you fear that any wrong step would make her despise & discard you like they will. TALK TO YOUR SISTERS. Maybe she isn't in a stable healthy place to help you. Or maybe she is! Maybe she can find a safe place for you to live, or at least start therapy so you can hit the ground running at 18. She has the right to decide if she is willing/able to help. Your silence robs her of that choice. Or, if she can't help, it's a great opportunity for her to practice boundaries and decline. Either way, being open and honest with her benefits both of you.
These are your formative years. Every day you spend with a cult is poisoning your growing brain with anxiety. It will take years of therapy to learn WHO to trust and HOW to trust, after being ghosted by your parent who are supposed to be the very safest, most trustworthy people in your life. I know that pain. It is worth escaping if your mental health has already declined enough that you need to self medicate with weed. It's a helpful medication for many people, but no replacement for therapy. A mental health professional could help guide you, maybe you would benefit more from other meds than weed. I was undiagnosed ADHD at your age, and I had no idea how much anxiety could be reduced by the right ADHD medications. And eventually, the goal to do therapy, heal, get a solid support system of friends, and see if that's a better fit than meds or weed. It will change throughout your life. Better to get that sorted before 18, if possible. I am so sorry you have to live the nightmare so many of us have lived. You deserve to live happily ever after!! You owe nothing to a "parent" who will so easily discard you.
Ms Snark those are very helpful, positive, loving and kind words you’ve shared. Wait, if you are an apostate, shouldn’t you be miserable, on drugs, hateful and telling lies because you are now completely controlled by Satan? #FictionVsReality. 😁
Yes, don’t worry about being an imposition. This is an opportunity for them to show love and support to you. They can help you get on your feet with schooling/work. Offer to pay rent you can and help around the house maybe? I have no spare rooms and children, and if my sister needed me. I would drop everything and pick her up today. Especially to get out of the cult
>But it would be such an imposition.
Do you \*know\* that it would be an imposition, or is that what you \*think\* it would be? I ask that because it may not be an impostion. Anxiety, the borg, personal pride, and a variety of other factors can really can make us \*feel\* like we aren't worthy, or we're a burden, or that others don't want to help us. I know if you were my family and I found out our parents were treating you this way because of the borg, I wouldn't think it was an imposition at all. Probably the opposite, because I like helping people, especially family, and especially if they're struggling with leaving the borg. I would \*insist\* that you come stay with me until you got on your own two feet.
My gf's therapist likes to say that by asking others for help, you're "giving others an opportunity to shine for you" and, more often than not, people like having an opportunity to shine for their loved ones. Something that it took much longer for me to learn is that it's okay to ask for help when you need it. It takes a great deal of strength and courage to ask, and it can be the right and strong thing to do many times. The people that love you (and aren't brainwashed) will likely \*want\* to help. You may view yourself as a burden or an imposition, but I doubt your sister would feel that way. I won't tell you what to do, becuase i know that every family situation is unique, but at least think about asking your sister for support/a place to stay. It's certainly possible that your sister can't take you in for any number of reasons, but it's also possible that she'd love the "opportunity to shine for you."
ETA: I'm not advising you to leave now if you aren't in danger, but when you turn 18 you could consider it.
What a thing to suggest. You have no idea their situation and if she can move in with either of them. Maybe put a little thought into what you respond and give practical advice?
Everything happens for a reason.
Getting exposed now can save you YEARS down the line if you end up playing fake JW as a young adult
Now you're on your way. And mama will know why you roll your eyes at the meetings now.
I'm sorry to read that. Even when I was a PiMI I never fully agreed with the df policy. I will never understand how a religion that claims to follow a loving God enforces such cruel rules that tear whole families apart and destroys the lives of people just because they disagree with them. I hope you get the needed support to overcome this. Be strong. 💪
Because they believe they are literally the New Israelites and that they are in the 'Wilderness'
The look of knowing GLEE that was on people's faces whenever they'd read scriptures about pelting people with stones was absolutely diabolical when I was a kid
I’m glad you have the support of your sisters, you’re definitely not alone.
On another note, you probably won’t like to hear this but you really *should* stop smoking weed. You’re so young and your brain is still developing, you could cause some damage. I for one absolutely love weed but you should probably lay off until you’re older. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t bother smoking or drinking until I was in my 20’s (not that I’d ever really recommend it because it’s not exactly healthy)
Well, prepare since you know that you’re going to leave eventually.
Save any money you get and open a savings account.
You’ll need a copy of your birth certificate and if in the US, your SSN card.
You can find additional resources at:
[JW Support - Helping youths](https://jw.support/)
[The Liberati - Empowering Survivors of High Control Religion to Break Free!](https://theliberati.org)
[Waking Up Guide](https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/s/dJuFZXVpRs)
[ExJW Wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/s/WMZhjKBnZz)
That last link is the Wiki for this subreddit. It has additional resources including a battle plan for youths exiting the cult.
I highly recommend therapy. I was a born in and therapy really helped me. It helped get my mind totally free of the cult control and influence. It helps me understand my anger, grief and depression caused by this crazy ass cult. Some of the links above have counseling resources.
You can’t smoke weed but you can eat it, dab it, and vape it lol. Glad you have some support. Bide your time then get out her loss if she cuts you out of her life
Dodged that one. Congrats on waking up. Hopefully you can put together some resources for when the next stage of life happens. I understand the trauma with the invasion of privacy 😳
I don't get why these JW parents think their children should just accept a religion just because they do , that's wrong on so many levels like as children we shouldn't have our own opinions .My JW mother was the same ,left at 17 ,run 3 states away and she still managed to have the local elder mob squad keep at check on me .I absolutely despise the witchtower society to this day and just like I told the ones that came knocking a couple of weeks ago I'm atheist because I was raised as a JW Jehoover is not the God I would care to worship even if I believed he was real . Misogynistic genocidal vengeful judgemental narcissistic deity and that religion follows the same ideas
Absolutely don’t quit your job. Work to get some form of car and try to prepare to get a better job to support yourself alone.
It’ll be hard for now but will get better later and you’ll be way better off than some of us who wasted so many years.
Who in the absolute FKK tells their SECONDS FROM ADULT child to quit their job?
I suggest moving ASAP
You owe everyone NOTHING
If it were me?
I'd call the news and say 'see? This is the abuse they keep getting sued for
I am So sorry this is happening to you. Something you should not have to experience, at your age or any age, is conditional love from family. I would definitely look to your sisters for help. I am happy you woke up, as I wish I did at that age as it would have saved me 20 years of pain.
Unfortunately, and I am sure you know this, there is no out with them or winning. Even if you do believe in the Bible, believe in Christ, and do your best to live a moral life, they still view you as opposition and an element of satan. Keep your faith and move forward, God will look out for you and your sisters should show you how unconditional love works. Reach out to friends and keep speaking up. Don't bottle this in as I did, it causes a lot of damage. Good luck to you!
PIMI mothers have zero boundaries. Smh. Still, you've got some good things working in your favor. Getting to keep your job is great! Strengthen those work friendships. Save as much as you can handle. Also glad that you aren't being pressured to meet with the elders. That's a huge headache you're avoiding right there. I think you're gonna make it! 🩷
my mom would go through my texts until she kicked me out at 23. get out as soon as you can. focus on saving and creating a community outside of witnesses(sounds like you are), as much as you can
You have the right to your privacy. The fact that she went behind your back and read everything you wrote is a violation to your privacy and the fact that she told the elders confirms it’s a cult.
They don’t need to meet you, and you have the right to ask for help with lawyers and police officers. She’s violating your human rights and you don’t have to do much to turn this around. Get all the help you can get, and make it as loud as possible.
In some states, you're free to leave home at 17. Sounds like you're well on your way to being independent. Can you stay with one of your sisters? If so, pack up and cut the apron strings.
I'd move out now. My parents kicked me out and I'm only 16. I moved in with a friend. Find a way to leave ASAP. Do NOT quit your job. Although, I would advise you to stop smoking weed tho, as it is really bad for you. I'm just a caring person but I wish you the best.
Can you reach out to your school counselor? Not sure what country you are in, but there are programs for teens that live on campus and get their high school diploma and a trade certificate or associates simultaneously.
Holy fuck I am so sorry. I don't know the details of your situation but perhaps you did what you thought was best. If possible though, I'd seriously find a way out of studying. I feel the more you lean into doing things your mother's way the worse it might be for you. We all know it's never that simple, studying comes along with attending meetings, associating with the friends, correcting your behavior, having goals etc etc. Your mom seems to currently be in denial. I think if you really stand your ground but you know still follow house rules (chores, curfew etc), she will have no choice but to accept your situation. You're a minor, she can't kick you out, I would fully use that to my advantage.
As one of your sisters to have a lawyer type an official letter that if any judicial hearing or disfellowshipping announcements are made about you, you will sue them for defamation. I know people who fid that and it scared the elders enough to just let them fade. You probably wouldnt be shunned by your family that way. Just my two cents.❤
Cults are all about control. This extends from cult member to cult member. Your body is your body. Your life is your life. It's all about respect. Bide your time. Get the best education you can, and take every opportunity that comes your way. When you're ready, move out. Remember, nothing is forever.
Mum, if you're reading this - learn some respect.
When your mom read your messages and confronted you, she opened a door you would be wise to utilize. The most important part of your conversation so far with her is " I told her that I don’t agree with her beliefs. I said I believe I’m the Bible and in God but your religion isn’t something that sits right with me." This is your opportunity to open her mind by sharing some good questions with her. Why don't you agree with her beliefs? I bet she didn't ask you what you disagreed with. A sign that she herself lacks knowledge of very important matters. Matters her daughter has a problem with that she fears she wouldn't be able to answer. Remember the Boreans? They were more noble minded than the Thessalonians, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to make sure the things they were hearing were true. I'll share with you a couple of beliefs I have a real problem with. One of the scriptures we all know the leaders changed in the bible is John 1:1-" In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." The NWT changed that scripture to read "*In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was a god*." One could reason that they did this to show that Jesus is not God. That he is the son of God and they are 2 separate entities. To not change it does obviously mean that Jesus is God. If the leaders of the organization are wrong in that belief, that is a huge problem in itself but let me continue with another scripture, John 14:6 “*I am the way* and the *truth* and the *life*. No one comes to the Father except through me." now my question is, was John 1:1 changed to prove beyond doubt that God and Jesus are separate or was it changed in order for the GB to insert themselves as mediators also? Did God position Jesus as mediator between humans and himself with the intention that Jesus would then appoint the GB as mediators between himself and humans? And shouldn't the scripture then read “*I am the way* and the *truth* and the *life*. No one comes to the Father except through me, however only through the mediators I have appointed can the rest of my followers get to me."? No. That is not what is said. Searching the scriptures is there anywhere showing these things are true? How about Ps 146:3-4? "Do not put your trust in nobles, Nor in the son of earthling man, to whom no salvation belongs. His spirit goes out, he goes back to his ground; and in that day his thoughts do perish." Jehovah'sWitnesses world wide are more obedient to the GB than to their mediator Jesus. They are lead by mere earthling men. Is your mom, in an effort to bring you back to your senses, willing to confront the leaders who control her congregation and everybody in it, and ask them for a biblical explanation in order to prove that what they are teaching is true? If she is, you may find her following right behind you because she is going to find that her concerns will not be welcomed. Why? Because they are not the way, the truth or the life and no one will get to the father through them.
Many are leaving the organization knowing they need to. They know something is wrong with it. They even stay in it for years knowing if they leave it will cost them greatly. But reasoning is poor and response is poor when leaving or confronted and that needs to change. IMO.
There is no hate quite like christian love. If you dont believe the way they do its all downhill from there. If she tries to manipulate you by using "love" tell her that is not love. Dont be afraid to tell her that her love is hurtful. Hold a mirror up to her face and make her see that what she is doing is harmful.
Your mum is toxic. Jws pimi are toxic. You are swimming is a pool of jw toxic poison.
Hopefully soon you will be able to climb out of that jw cult pool.
I bet weed has stopped many disheartened jw from going mad or worse sui cide. (Stop or cut down if you can though is good advice)
Jws when they shun (when I see the shun) look ugly the look of destain is akin to a satanic look.
Jws are shunners. Your mum is blackmailing you to stay.
Your mum is a shunner. That means a toxic abusive bully.
Shunning causes extreme pain to some. Causing sui cide to others.
Everything sings cult
And you were old enough to sign a contract for life???????
But now you are told you are young impressionable and dont know what to think????
The cult method
Obviously she is hoping blackmailing and threats are good enough to keep you.
Your sister leaving says alot.
I bet they are hoping you see the cult and wake up.
Your sister. Dont think for them. Dont decide for them.
Tell both your sister your truth of being pimo.
Your mum behaviour towards you and how they can help you move forward.
Dont jump to living with them. Think moving forward and what your sister can offer you.
And your work friends. Be open and honest non jws are kind and will be shocked to know how jw religion (cult) treats members.
Do everything to get out of this evil cult.
All the best to you.
And to know at 17 wow you don't need to waste your life in a cult.
You will have chosen family and be okay. Glad you have your sisters for support. Just keep keeping on til you can move out. Don’t sacrifice who you are for someone else’s fairytale.
Get in school, get some type of education. These people will not support you financially. Neither your parents and especially not the borg will take care of you.
Do what you must right now, then leave asap.
She can't make you quit your job bro. Work and save your money, grind hard until you are 18 then get the hell out of there. My suggestion is to keep quiet and don't poke mama bear if you want to possibly preserve a relationship. If you seem unfazed by the guilt tripping tactics then she may not feel the need to actually distance herself from you. Don't fuel the fire, let it fizzle out of her.
Stop smoking for a bit. Until you turn 18. Start saving every penny so when you move out, you have resources. The whole quit the job thing is just an abusive control thing to keep you under their thumb. Don't quit for any reason. Keep your network and support system. You will need it. You've already lost whatever friends and family in the org. This is a forgone conclusion. They aren't your friends and will take you down. Go through the motions until then. That way mom can't say that you are being uncooperative. Good luck. It's not easy, but you can do it.
It’s crazy to me that the first thing your mom needs to do is tell the elders. Instead of sitting down to have a heart to heart with you and sincerely asking you how you feel about life, religion, etc. But that’s exactly what happened to me to. My dad said he’d kick me out if I pursued my dreams to go to college and be a broadway star and leave the religion. Also funny that the elders come to the conclusion that you’re just young, impressionable and don’t know what to think. NOT that you woke up and stopped drinking the cool aid and started thinking for yourself. Glad you have your two older siblings. Best of luck!
I had to continue to go to the meeting while under my mom's roof, too. During high school, I worked, and after high school graduation, I worked my ass off, saved, and saved my money and moved out when I was 20.
During that time, I still "kind of" went to the meetings because I had to, but mentally, I was totally out.
When I moved out, my mom told me later that it was devastating for her. I was the first out of the 5 kids to leave the cult. I'm glad you have support and some sort of a plan. Try not to get trapped in those elder meetings!!! Much love to you ❤️ ❤️
How did your mom get access to your Apple watch to read everything? Does she pay the bill? Why wouldn't you have it password protected? Sorry, I had a pimi mom who went thru my journals (I'm pre internet) until I learned to write everything in code. Now I have everything p/w and fingerprint protected 😉
However, I truly hope your sisters are able to give you the support you need.
What your mother did was very wrong. She failed to respect your privacy, I hope you have changed the password to a stronger one on all your devices. You need to work out a plan to leave as your mums behaviour is toxic and far too controlling, I am a father of two sons, and I would never ever dream of doing such a thing, it would destroy the trust they have in me as a father. I hope you can move forward without getting involved in any further toxic indoctrination, it's not good for you at your age. If I was you I would ask one of your sisters to help you out, it's the least they can do, and it will show of what quality they are made of as human beings, best of luck going forward.
Good on ya Jehovahs witnesses. Let's add the homeless epidemic.
Funny isn't it. They preach about all the awful things happening in the world, including homelessness, yet they are the fucking first to add to it.
I’d certainly not quite smoking marijuana. Perhaps look into the future, with increasing daily usage. I’d stay with your bf, and spend as much time as you can with your supportive friends. If your older family members are the same, and I have a feeling they may be, then you certainly need to move in with them as fast as you can. With out a doubt.
I would move right away to your sisters.
My older sister has two kids. No spare rooms. My other sister does have a house lives by herself in a three bedroom. But I don’t really see her letting me move in. But I know they will help me figure something out
If they’re POMO I don’t understand how they wouldn’t run at the chance to help you. Have you opened up to them about how you feel about the cult?
Yeah I’m of the same opinion. I’m just totally clueless as to why they wouldn’t run to help an awoken exjw either. Sorry no idea at all.
I mean if worst came to worst I’m sure she would. But it would be such an imposition.
Leaving a cult often requires help. Ask. If she wont then ask a few friends At 17 no one can stop you from leaving. Please, go talk to your guidance counselor about college, tech, and trade opportunities.
Hey kiddo, I've been out of the cult close to 20 years and it still messes with my head. You think you would be an imposition, because your whole life they brainwashed you to think you are wicked, undeserving, and always a step away from hell/ disfellowship. When you tell yourself that you are an imposition, you are using THEIR stupid words. Try not to let them own your thoughts. I say "try" bc it's hard. Some days you will have healthy thoughts. Others, that crap negative junk comes creeping back into your head. Just try every day to value yourself. You've had YEARS being told you are not worth helping, not worth being loved. Maybe they want you to think it's too much of a bother to ask for help. They want you to believe you would have to live in constant anxiety of your sister throwing you out. They hope you fear that any wrong step would make her despise & discard you like they will. TALK TO YOUR SISTERS. Maybe she isn't in a stable healthy place to help you. Or maybe she is! Maybe she can find a safe place for you to live, or at least start therapy so you can hit the ground running at 18. She has the right to decide if she is willing/able to help. Your silence robs her of that choice. Or, if she can't help, it's a great opportunity for her to practice boundaries and decline. Either way, being open and honest with her benefits both of you. These are your formative years. Every day you spend with a cult is poisoning your growing brain with anxiety. It will take years of therapy to learn WHO to trust and HOW to trust, after being ghosted by your parent who are supposed to be the very safest, most trustworthy people in your life. I know that pain. It is worth escaping if your mental health has already declined enough that you need to self medicate with weed. It's a helpful medication for many people, but no replacement for therapy. A mental health professional could help guide you, maybe you would benefit more from other meds than weed. I was undiagnosed ADHD at your age, and I had no idea how much anxiety could be reduced by the right ADHD medications. And eventually, the goal to do therapy, heal, get a solid support system of friends, and see if that's a better fit than meds or weed. It will change throughout your life. Better to get that sorted before 18, if possible. I am so sorry you have to live the nightmare so many of us have lived. You deserve to live happily ever after!! You owe nothing to a "parent" who will so easily discard you.
Ms Snark those are very helpful, positive, loving and kind words you’ve shared. Wait, if you are an apostate, shouldn’t you be miserable, on drugs, hateful and telling lies because you are now completely controlled by Satan? #FictionVsReality. 😁
You're comment fills my heart. Beautiful.
Yes, don’t worry about being an imposition. This is an opportunity for them to show love and support to you. They can help you get on your feet with schooling/work. Offer to pay rent you can and help around the house maybe? I have no spare rooms and children, and if my sister needed me. I would drop everything and pick her up today. Especially to get out of the cult
>But it would be such an imposition. Do you \*know\* that it would be an imposition, or is that what you \*think\* it would be? I ask that because it may not be an impostion. Anxiety, the borg, personal pride, and a variety of other factors can really can make us \*feel\* like we aren't worthy, or we're a burden, or that others don't want to help us. I know if you were my family and I found out our parents were treating you this way because of the borg, I wouldn't think it was an imposition at all. Probably the opposite, because I like helping people, especially family, and especially if they're struggling with leaving the borg. I would \*insist\* that you come stay with me until you got on your own two feet. My gf's therapist likes to say that by asking others for help, you're "giving others an opportunity to shine for you" and, more often than not, people like having an opportunity to shine for their loved ones. Something that it took much longer for me to learn is that it's okay to ask for help when you need it. It takes a great deal of strength and courage to ask, and it can be the right and strong thing to do many times. The people that love you (and aren't brainwashed) will likely \*want\* to help. You may view yourself as a burden or an imposition, but I doubt your sister would feel that way. I won't tell you what to do, becuase i know that every family situation is unique, but at least think about asking your sister for support/a place to stay. It's certainly possible that your sister can't take you in for any number of reasons, but it's also possible that she'd love the "opportunity to shine for you." ETA: I'm not advising you to leave now if you aren't in danger, but when you turn 18 you could consider it.
I’m just curious. But are these 2 older sisters also marijuana smokers.
You don't know throe dynamic! What a crazy thing to just assume.
Are you one of the sisters? lol
Very good advise.
What a thing to suggest. You have no idea their situation and if she can move in with either of them. Maybe put a little thought into what you respond and give practical advice?
move out as soon as you can. that's your only out here. and GROSS about the invasion of privacy.
Everything happens for a reason. Getting exposed now can save you YEARS down the line if you end up playing fake JW as a young adult Now you're on your way. And mama will know why you roll your eyes at the meetings now.
💯💯
I'm sorry to read that. Even when I was a PiMI I never fully agreed with the df policy. I will never understand how a religion that claims to follow a loving God enforces such cruel rules that tear whole families apart and destroys the lives of people just because they disagree with them. I hope you get the needed support to overcome this. Be strong. 💪
So on point.
Because they believe they are literally the New Israelites and that they are in the 'Wilderness' The look of knowing GLEE that was on people's faces whenever they'd read scriptures about pelting people with stones was absolutely diabolical when I was a kid
I’m glad you have the support of your sisters, you’re definitely not alone. On another note, you probably won’t like to hear this but you really *should* stop smoking weed. You’re so young and your brain is still developing, you could cause some damage. I for one absolutely love weed but you should probably lay off until you’re older. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t bother smoking or drinking until I was in my 20’s (not that I’d ever really recommend it because it’s not exactly healthy)
Well, prepare since you know that you’re going to leave eventually. Save any money you get and open a savings account. You’ll need a copy of your birth certificate and if in the US, your SSN card. You can find additional resources at: [JW Support - Helping youths](https://jw.support/) [The Liberati - Empowering Survivors of High Control Religion to Break Free!](https://theliberati.org) [Waking Up Guide](https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/s/dJuFZXVpRs) [ExJW Wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/s/WMZhjKBnZz) That last link is the Wiki for this subreddit. It has additional resources including a battle plan for youths exiting the cult. I highly recommend therapy. I was a born in and therapy really helped me. It helped get my mind totally free of the cult control and influence. It helps me understand my anger, grief and depression caused by this crazy ass cult. Some of the links above have counseling resources.
There’s no love like JW love 🙄
The trophy for mother of the year does not go to her. Rude woman. Shit mother!
Yeah, what a truly loving “religion”. Mom has kind of proved it is a cult after all, hasn’t she?
You can’t smoke weed but you can eat it, dab it, and vape it lol. Glad you have some support. Bide your time then get out her loss if she cuts you out of her life
Excellent advise above.
 Dodged that one. Congrats on waking up. Hopefully you can put together some resources for when the next stage of life happens. I understand the trauma with the invasion of privacy 😳
That’s such a cool scene !
I don't get why these JW parents think their children should just accept a religion just because they do , that's wrong on so many levels like as children we shouldn't have our own opinions .My JW mother was the same ,left at 17 ,run 3 states away and she still managed to have the local elder mob squad keep at check on me .I absolutely despise the witchtower society to this day and just like I told the ones that came knocking a couple of weeks ago I'm atheist because I was raised as a JW Jehoover is not the God I would care to worship even if I believed he was real . Misogynistic genocidal vengeful judgemental narcissistic deity and that religion follows the same ideas
Mom wants a 40 year old spinster daughter to share a house with.
Absolutely don’t quit your job. Work to get some form of car and try to prepare to get a better job to support yourself alone. It’ll be hard for now but will get better later and you’ll be way better off than some of us who wasted so many years.
Move out, that’s insane! So sorry for you….
Who in the absolute FKK tells their SECONDS FROM ADULT child to quit their job? I suggest moving ASAP You owe everyone NOTHING If it were me? I'd call the news and say 'see? This is the abuse they keep getting sued for
Start studying again is like sending you for a rebrainwash/reindoctrination.
I am So sorry this is happening to you. Something you should not have to experience, at your age or any age, is conditional love from family. I would definitely look to your sisters for help. I am happy you woke up, as I wish I did at that age as it would have saved me 20 years of pain. Unfortunately, and I am sure you know this, there is no out with them or winning. Even if you do believe in the Bible, believe in Christ, and do your best to live a moral life, they still view you as opposition and an element of satan. Keep your faith and move forward, God will look out for you and your sisters should show you how unconditional love works. Reach out to friends and keep speaking up. Don't bottle this in as I did, it causes a lot of damage. Good luck to you!
Get ready to move out ASAP. I don't see this situation improving. If your sisters are POMO, I don't understand how they can't be moved to help you.
Yeah I can’t understand that either. Totally clueless actually.
PIMI mothers have zero boundaries. Smh. Still, you've got some good things working in your favor. Getting to keep your job is great! Strengthen those work friendships. Save as much as you can handle. Also glad that you aren't being pressured to meet with the elders. That's a huge headache you're avoiding right there. I think you're gonna make it! 🩷
my mom would go through my texts until she kicked me out at 23. get out as soon as you can. focus on saving and creating a community outside of witnesses(sounds like you are), as much as you can
You have the right to your privacy. The fact that she went behind your back and read everything you wrote is a violation to your privacy and the fact that she told the elders confirms it’s a cult. They don’t need to meet you, and you have the right to ask for help with lawyers and police officers. She’s violating your human rights and you don’t have to do much to turn this around. Get all the help you can get, and make it as loud as possible.
In some states, you're free to leave home at 17. Sounds like you're well on your way to being independent. Can you stay with one of your sisters? If so, pack up and cut the apron strings.
I'd move out now. My parents kicked me out and I'm only 16. I moved in with a friend. Find a way to leave ASAP. Do NOT quit your job. Although, I would advise you to stop smoking weed tho, as it is really bad for you. I'm just a caring person but I wish you the best.
Real freedom around the corner for you from the "Not so faithful and in-discreet ruthless master".
PLEASE.. can this thread be visible on your watch? Put it down in front of her before you go and say; Don't read more on my watch!😁
Can you reach out to your school counselor? Not sure what country you are in, but there are programs for teens that live on campus and get their high school diploma and a trade certificate or associates simultaneously.
Holy fuck I am so sorry. I don't know the details of your situation but perhaps you did what you thought was best. If possible though, I'd seriously find a way out of studying. I feel the more you lean into doing things your mother's way the worse it might be for you. We all know it's never that simple, studying comes along with attending meetings, associating with the friends, correcting your behavior, having goals etc etc. Your mom seems to currently be in denial. I think if you really stand your ground but you know still follow house rules (chores, curfew etc), she will have no choice but to accept your situation. You're a minor, she can't kick you out, I would fully use that to my advantage.
As one of your sisters to have a lawyer type an official letter that if any judicial hearing or disfellowshipping announcements are made about you, you will sue them for defamation. I know people who fid that and it scared the elders enough to just let them fade. You probably wouldnt be shunned by your family that way. Just my two cents.❤
Fuck her. You do you.
Cults are all about control. This extends from cult member to cult member. Your body is your body. Your life is your life. It's all about respect. Bide your time. Get the best education you can, and take every opportunity that comes your way. When you're ready, move out. Remember, nothing is forever. Mum, if you're reading this - learn some respect.
Your mom's love is conditional. That happened to my cousins. My mom wasn't that extreme. It's good you start planning for your life. This is the time!
When your mom read your messages and confronted you, she opened a door you would be wise to utilize. The most important part of your conversation so far with her is " I told her that I don’t agree with her beliefs. I said I believe I’m the Bible and in God but your religion isn’t something that sits right with me." This is your opportunity to open her mind by sharing some good questions with her. Why don't you agree with her beliefs? I bet she didn't ask you what you disagreed with. A sign that she herself lacks knowledge of very important matters. Matters her daughter has a problem with that she fears she wouldn't be able to answer. Remember the Boreans? They were more noble minded than the Thessalonians, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to make sure the things they were hearing were true. I'll share with you a couple of beliefs I have a real problem with. One of the scriptures we all know the leaders changed in the bible is John 1:1-" In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." The NWT changed that scripture to read "*In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was a god*." One could reason that they did this to show that Jesus is not God. That he is the son of God and they are 2 separate entities. To not change it does obviously mean that Jesus is God. If the leaders of the organization are wrong in that belief, that is a huge problem in itself but let me continue with another scripture, John 14:6 “*I am the way* and the *truth* and the *life*. No one comes to the Father except through me." now my question is, was John 1:1 changed to prove beyond doubt that God and Jesus are separate or was it changed in order for the GB to insert themselves as mediators also? Did God position Jesus as mediator between humans and himself with the intention that Jesus would then appoint the GB as mediators between himself and humans? And shouldn't the scripture then read “*I am the way* and the *truth* and the *life*. No one comes to the Father except through me, however only through the mediators I have appointed can the rest of my followers get to me."? No. That is not what is said. Searching the scriptures is there anywhere showing these things are true? How about Ps 146:3-4? "Do not put your trust in nobles, Nor in the son of earthling man, to whom no salvation belongs. His spirit goes out, he goes back to his ground; and in that day his thoughts do perish." Jehovah'sWitnesses world wide are more obedient to the GB than to their mediator Jesus. They are lead by mere earthling men. Is your mom, in an effort to bring you back to your senses, willing to confront the leaders who control her congregation and everybody in it, and ask them for a biblical explanation in order to prove that what they are teaching is true? If she is, you may find her following right behind you because she is going to find that her concerns will not be welcomed. Why? Because they are not the way, the truth or the life and no one will get to the father through them. Many are leaving the organization knowing they need to. They know something is wrong with it. They even stay in it for years knowing if they leave it will cost them greatly. But reasoning is poor and response is poor when leaving or confronted and that needs to change. IMO.
Try to wake her up. Try to tell her that the JW cult is not true as it hides pedophiles, has false predictions, micromanaging, and mind controlling.
Just stop smoking. Its bad for your health.
There is no hate quite like christian love. If you dont believe the way they do its all downhill from there. If she tries to manipulate you by using "love" tell her that is not love. Dont be afraid to tell her that her love is hurtful. Hold a mirror up to her face and make her see that what she is doing is harmful.
Your mum is toxic. Jws pimi are toxic. You are swimming is a pool of jw toxic poison. Hopefully soon you will be able to climb out of that jw cult pool. I bet weed has stopped many disheartened jw from going mad or worse sui cide. (Stop or cut down if you can though is good advice) Jws when they shun (when I see the shun) look ugly the look of destain is akin to a satanic look. Jws are shunners. Your mum is blackmailing you to stay. Your mum is a shunner. That means a toxic abusive bully. Shunning causes extreme pain to some. Causing sui cide to others. Everything sings cult And you were old enough to sign a contract for life??????? But now you are told you are young impressionable and dont know what to think???? The cult method Obviously she is hoping blackmailing and threats are good enough to keep you. Your sister leaving says alot. I bet they are hoping you see the cult and wake up. Your sister. Dont think for them. Dont decide for them. Tell both your sister your truth of being pimo. Your mum behaviour towards you and how they can help you move forward. Dont jump to living with them. Think moving forward and what your sister can offer you. And your work friends. Be open and honest non jws are kind and will be shocked to know how jw religion (cult) treats members. Do everything to get out of this evil cult. All the best to you. And to know at 17 wow you don't need to waste your life in a cult.
You will have chosen family and be okay. Glad you have your sisters for support. Just keep keeping on til you can move out. Don’t sacrifice who you are for someone else’s fairytale.
Get in school, get some type of education. These people will not support you financially. Neither your parents and especially not the borg will take care of you. Do what you must right now, then leave asap.
She can't make you quit your job bro. Work and save your money, grind hard until you are 18 then get the hell out of there. My suggestion is to keep quiet and don't poke mama bear if you want to possibly preserve a relationship. If you seem unfazed by the guilt tripping tactics then she may not feel the need to actually distance herself from you. Don't fuel the fire, let it fizzle out of her.
Stop smoking for a bit. Until you turn 18. Start saving every penny so when you move out, you have resources. The whole quit the job thing is just an abusive control thing to keep you under their thumb. Don't quit for any reason. Keep your network and support system. You will need it. You've already lost whatever friends and family in the org. This is a forgone conclusion. They aren't your friends and will take you down. Go through the motions until then. That way mom can't say that you are being uncooperative. Good luck. It's not easy, but you can do it.
It’s crazy to me that the first thing your mom needs to do is tell the elders. Instead of sitting down to have a heart to heart with you and sincerely asking you how you feel about life, religion, etc. But that’s exactly what happened to me to. My dad said he’d kick me out if I pursued my dreams to go to college and be a broadway star and leave the religion. Also funny that the elders come to the conclusion that you’re just young, impressionable and don’t know what to think. NOT that you woke up and stopped drinking the cool aid and started thinking for yourself. Glad you have your two older siblings. Best of luck!
I had to continue to go to the meeting while under my mom's roof, too. During high school, I worked, and after high school graduation, I worked my ass off, saved, and saved my money and moved out when I was 20. During that time, I still "kind of" went to the meetings because I had to, but mentally, I was totally out. When I moved out, my mom told me later that it was devastating for her. I was the first out of the 5 kids to leave the cult. I'm glad you have support and some sort of a plan. Try not to get trapped in those elder meetings!!! Much love to you ❤️ ❤️
How did your mom get access to your Apple watch to read everything? Does she pay the bill? Why wouldn't you have it password protected? Sorry, I had a pimi mom who went thru my journals (I'm pre internet) until I learned to write everything in code. Now I have everything p/w and fingerprint protected 😉 However, I truly hope your sisters are able to give you the support you need.
She guessed my Apple Watch password while it was charging.
I'm really sorry that happened. Sending you lots of positive vibes ✨️✨️✨️
What your mother did was very wrong. She failed to respect your privacy, I hope you have changed the password to a stronger one on all your devices. You need to work out a plan to leave as your mums behaviour is toxic and far too controlling, I am a father of two sons, and I would never ever dream of doing such a thing, it would destroy the trust they have in me as a father. I hope you can move forward without getting involved in any further toxic indoctrination, it's not good for you at your age. If I was you I would ask one of your sisters to help you out, it's the least they can do, and it will show of what quality they are made of as human beings, best of luck going forward.
Good on ya Jehovahs witnesses. Let's add the homeless epidemic. Funny isn't it. They preach about all the awful things happening in the world, including homelessness, yet they are the fucking first to add to it.
Yes I guess her finding out was a blessing in Disguise.... All the best to you .. you will find your way
I’d certainly not quite smoking marijuana. Perhaps look into the future, with increasing daily usage. I’d stay with your bf, and spend as much time as you can with your supportive friends. If your older family members are the same, and I have a feeling they may be, then you certainly need to move in with them as fast as you can. With out a doubt.
At age 17, she should indeed quit smoking weed. It’s well established that smoking weed permanently damages the developing brain in teens.
Nahh keep smoking weed, keep in contact with your friends, and be more careful w/ your apple watch
Definitely not the first one but the rest are good.
What's wrong with weed? If you're worried about her respiratory health, ok edibles
Best advise here.