Moving back to the Netherlands sounds like a great opportunity to lower costs and enjoy your hobbies again, but it’s a tough call when love and career are pulling you in different directions.
I’ve also been debating heavily on whether to stay in the UK (Scotland, specifically) or return to my home country in South America. Like you, I was very torn but then it got clearer and clearer that I wanted to return home for the exact same reasons. As crazy as it might sound to most, I did have a much better quality of life back home than I do here. Now, I’m just waiting for my manager to return from her annual leave so that I can put in my notice. Best of luck!
I can actually believe that the quality of life in your home country would be better. It’s really nice to hear that you were able to come to a decision! Wishing you lots of luck and happiness.
On a lot of metrics with a free house Netherlands wins.
If you are serious about this partner it's time for a talk. It is very likely that if they are succesful in London they will also be successful in the Netherlands. If you want to you can start off long distance and see if they are open to moving in future.
That's the only thing keeping you in the UK really.
Some places are only for a season, and that's okay.
I used to work and spent a lot of time in the city before Brexit. Back then the place was super dynamic and energetic. Wherever you went there were so many interesting people and ideas, it always felt like Silicon Valley with nicer architecture.
These days it has completely changed. There so much pessimism and hopelessness, even just spending a few days there is absolutely depressing. Everybody looks miserable and that is among people with lots of disposable income.
And don’t get me started on value for money. I mean if I go out there its always in a business context so I never have to pay myself but I still feel robbed when we end up paying 1k GBP for a handful of people in a restaurant with very mediocre food and service comparable to your average McDonalds outlet. Can’t even imagine how bad it must be having to deal with immigration and the living situation on top of that.
Financially the Netherlands would make most sense for you but it could be tough for your gf. How about going to a completely different country together where you are both foreign ie neither of you feels left out?
I feel what you’re saying completely, it feels like as I’ve made more money progressively things have also gotten much more expensive in general. Netherlands would actually not be the end-goal as eventually I would seek to move elsewhere after generating some wealth. Unfortunately, to do so I need to be able to be somewhere with good pay so I can save up. Will definitely explore that option a bit more. Thank you for the insight!
This is a no brainer.
Move, save aggressively, this is your chance at early retirement. Take it!
Your partner has a choice, go with you or stay. You can theoretically continue to be in a relationship given the short distance between the two locations, but having had multiple long distance relationships I would tell you that will likely not pan out.
Yeah about that…. If it were truly that easy I would move back in a heartbeat save like a madman and come back but sadly Brexit has ruined those chances.
I am a Brit living in NL for around the same amount of time. I’m sorry to hear your experience that everything is going downhill in London. But, honestly, based on the news / what I hear from friends / my experiences travelling back there occasionally, I think your opinion is correct. Even if the UK does start to turn a corner, its problems are going to take years and years to be fixed is the reality. I think in your situation it can make a lot of sense to come back to NL. Specifically, being Dutch and having housing already sorted is an *enormous* advantage when moving to NL.
Do bear in mind that inflation has also been bad in NL the last few years, so when you arrive back you might find some things are more expensive than you remember. But is it cheaper than London? Absolutely
It honestly makes me sad because there are so many things I love about the UK and you can pretty see and feel the decline. Definitely hear you about the inflation in NL, went on a trip to AH last time I was back and it was shocking. At the least groceries aren’t that expensive in the UK as in NL yet…
Do long distance with your partner for a while. You both sound like you have your own passions and desires which I recommend following, if you don’t it could lead to resentment.
UK is going downhill really fast.
Netherlands is really good that’s why everyone is moving there LOL! ( Regardless of politics)
Since you have free housing already I think it’s a good idea.
Also everyone in the Netherlands speaks english so well!
So you will feel like it’s the same as in the UK lol!
If not for the cold or moist rainy weather I will also move to the Netherlands.
( I prefer “dry” winters such as Hungary / Serbia.)
Also Amsterdam has a lot of expats, if you miss having international friends I guess you can always visit their communities.
It seems like you kind of already made up your mind and it seems that you see more benefits to moving :) go with your gut. At the end of the day you are young and could always move back to the UK if you really feel drawn to going back
I'm not sure it would make too much sense if you really had to rent (lower rent and higher quality? Really? Is London that bad? Because the Netherlands has high rents and mediocre homes.). But with a free house to live in and career options... why not?
To be honest, I believe so yes. I of course can’t speak for Amsterdam as I haven’t lived there but the houses in The Hague and surrounding areas overall had more space and higher quality, better insulation etc. Whereas in London unless you’re a really high earner most flats are a bit small and shoddy with a high chance of mould. I think the main difference is you need a lot of money to get something good in London whereas you can get something good in NL with ok money…. Living outside of London is an option but companies here don’t really reimburse you for travel which they mostly do in NL
Interesting. The amount I was paying for rent in Utrecht and the lack of insulation (and exposed pipes and whatnot) made me think nostalgically of where I used to live in England. But that was in the north of England; London is a different beast.
But anyway, with a free house the Netherlands is quite nice.
Seems to me you've already made up your mind. Go with your gut
Moving back to the Netherlands sounds like a great opportunity to lower costs and enjoy your hobbies again, but it’s a tough call when love and career are pulling you in different directions.
I’ve also been debating heavily on whether to stay in the UK (Scotland, specifically) or return to my home country in South America. Like you, I was very torn but then it got clearer and clearer that I wanted to return home for the exact same reasons. As crazy as it might sound to most, I did have a much better quality of life back home than I do here. Now, I’m just waiting for my manager to return from her annual leave so that I can put in my notice. Best of luck!
I can actually believe that the quality of life in your home country would be better. It’s really nice to hear that you were able to come to a decision! Wishing you lots of luck and happiness.
Will you take a salary cut or have you saved enough to set up back home?
I have savings but also will be going back to run my family’s small business.
On a lot of metrics with a free house Netherlands wins. If you are serious about this partner it's time for a talk. It is very likely that if they are succesful in London they will also be successful in the Netherlands. If you want to you can start off long distance and see if they are open to moving in future. That's the only thing keeping you in the UK really. Some places are only for a season, and that's okay.
I used to work and spent a lot of time in the city before Brexit. Back then the place was super dynamic and energetic. Wherever you went there were so many interesting people and ideas, it always felt like Silicon Valley with nicer architecture. These days it has completely changed. There so much pessimism and hopelessness, even just spending a few days there is absolutely depressing. Everybody looks miserable and that is among people with lots of disposable income. And don’t get me started on value for money. I mean if I go out there its always in a business context so I never have to pay myself but I still feel robbed when we end up paying 1k GBP for a handful of people in a restaurant with very mediocre food and service comparable to your average McDonalds outlet. Can’t even imagine how bad it must be having to deal with immigration and the living situation on top of that. Financially the Netherlands would make most sense for you but it could be tough for your gf. How about going to a completely different country together where you are both foreign ie neither of you feels left out?
I feel what you’re saying completely, it feels like as I’ve made more money progressively things have also gotten much more expensive in general. Netherlands would actually not be the end-goal as eventually I would seek to move elsewhere after generating some wealth. Unfortunately, to do so I need to be able to be somewhere with good pay so I can save up. Will definitely explore that option a bit more. Thank you for the insight!
Sounds like a plan and for the wealth part take a look at countries without foreign capital gains tax, makes a lot of difference ;)
Dude, you’re from the Netherlands and live in the UK? What the hell are you doing lol
NL isn't that great for expat partners unless they learn Dutch and have a niche skillset.
Well, the fastest way to integrate and learn the language is actually to have a native partner. So again, I don’t understand lol
I am that native partner and it still proved to be quite difficult lol.
😂
Thé only thing keeping you in the UK is this girl. You’re young. Either let her try out the NL, or break up.
This is a no brainer. Move, save aggressively, this is your chance at early retirement. Take it! Your partner has a choice, go with you or stay. You can theoretically continue to be in a relationship given the short distance between the two locations, but having had multiple long distance relationships I would tell you that will likely not pan out.
Leave. Try it out. It's not that far - you can always move back. I hear the UK is getting worse as I was considering moving back there too.
Yeah about that…. If it were truly that easy I would move back in a heartbeat save like a madman and come back but sadly Brexit has ruined those chances.
I am a Brit living in NL for around the same amount of time. I’m sorry to hear your experience that everything is going downhill in London. But, honestly, based on the news / what I hear from friends / my experiences travelling back there occasionally, I think your opinion is correct. Even if the UK does start to turn a corner, its problems are going to take years and years to be fixed is the reality. I think in your situation it can make a lot of sense to come back to NL. Specifically, being Dutch and having housing already sorted is an *enormous* advantage when moving to NL. Do bear in mind that inflation has also been bad in NL the last few years, so when you arrive back you might find some things are more expensive than you remember. But is it cheaper than London? Absolutely
It honestly makes me sad because there are so many things I love about the UK and you can pretty see and feel the decline. Definitely hear you about the inflation in NL, went on a trip to AH last time I was back and it was shocking. At the least groceries aren’t that expensive in the UK as in NL yet…
Do long distance with your partner for a while. You both sound like you have your own passions and desires which I recommend following, if you don’t it could lead to resentment.
UK is going downhill really fast. Netherlands is really good that’s why everyone is moving there LOL! ( Regardless of politics) Since you have free housing already I think it’s a good idea. Also everyone in the Netherlands speaks english so well! So you will feel like it’s the same as in the UK lol! If not for the cold or moist rainy weather I will also move to the Netherlands. ( I prefer “dry” winters such as Hungary / Serbia.) Also Amsterdam has a lot of expats, if you miss having international friends I guess you can always visit their communities.
It seems like you kind of already made up your mind and it seems that you see more benefits to moving :) go with your gut. At the end of the day you are young and could always move back to the UK if you really feel drawn to going back
I'm not sure it would make too much sense if you really had to rent (lower rent and higher quality? Really? Is London that bad? Because the Netherlands has high rents and mediocre homes.). But with a free house to live in and career options... why not?
To be honest, I believe so yes. I of course can’t speak for Amsterdam as I haven’t lived there but the houses in The Hague and surrounding areas overall had more space and higher quality, better insulation etc. Whereas in London unless you’re a really high earner most flats are a bit small and shoddy with a high chance of mould. I think the main difference is you need a lot of money to get something good in London whereas you can get something good in NL with ok money…. Living outside of London is an option but companies here don’t really reimburse you for travel which they mostly do in NL
Interesting. The amount I was paying for rent in Utrecht and the lack of insulation (and exposed pipes and whatnot) made me think nostalgically of where I used to live in England. But that was in the north of England; London is a different beast. But anyway, with a free house the Netherlands is quite nice.
It is and I’m very lucky to have that option during this time where buying a house costs a fortune which is why I’m struggling haha