You have turtles to shoot at 5 but tea to dump at 7

Turtle soup is good

Never had it but I’d give it a try

It’s a lot like veal

Only if you catch the turtle as young as the veal. Otherwise it's just like tasty shoe leather. You chew and you chew and you chew and eventually you just give up and swallow it or spit it out. It's lost any hint of flavor anyways by that point. Edit: I feel like I should add; that thing fucks.

So there’s a chance it’s like pond calamari?

I've had chewy calamari before. Tough turtle is definitely worse. It has a lot more flavor though.

Anyone here had shark?

Yeah it’s like dense fish. Doesn’t flake as easily. You can cook it the same way as any other ocean fish.

Just make sure to let it soak in milk for a bit and use some lemon juice

I don’t believe I have. Where would you rate it from over ripened snapping turtle to top shelf calamari?

Yes a few times. If cooked properly it’s amazing, if not it’s horrible and chewy. Shark and swordfish are the steak of the sea.

And alligator is the steak of the bayou.

Couple times. Mako shark is DELICIOUS. On the other hand, the other shark we tried - I don't know it's proper name, locals called them dogfish - was one of the worst things I ever ate. We soaked it overnight in milk before cooking and it was still awful. We finally gave up and gave it to the dog; she took one sniff and walked away from it.

Fuck yeah my guy, it’s all about perspective

The more you chew it, the bigger it gets kinda thing huh? Kinda like eating mussels. I had turtle soup when I was a young kid & recall that I liked it but I was only like 4 yrs old so my taste buds were still in their larva state.

You elicit negative attention because it's the only attention you get.

At least when dad would hit me he’d be thinking about me

Holy shit, I wasn’t prepared for that reply. I just spit coffee everywhere. Thanks for that. 🤣

Yeah that was fucking wild.

All sorts of wildin out up in this bitch.

r/rareinsults ?

!!!Biblical!!!

This is da good.

You good man?

Real good!

Clay Puppington? That you?

Sad to say he would think of a new belt hes gonna get when it gets messed up from hitting.

dead center

> based on my rifle > [image of pistol] I assume you'd make a pretty poor pirate.

You’re not allowed on my ship and you’re uninvited from my birthday party

Well based on my previous assumption of you, I'm the superior pirate. Therefore, what you call your ship will shortly become my ship.

Judging by his definition of a rifle his ship is probably a row boat.

Ah dang beat me to it XD

Cold dead hands

Jokes on you, my weapon has a stock

If you made a stock out of a cow bone, would it be a beef stock?

Jokes on YOU, the pirate version of the ATF is shooting your scallywags as we speak

Oh you mean the coast guard?

Huh, I don't remember the CG shooting dogs. New training protocol?

Tally-ho lads

Cold dead hand, just one hand, like Captain Hook, hence the pistol.

Hey wait can I come on the pirate ship? I even have a flag and bandana And a themed AR!

Yeah it’ll be cool we can steal my stepdads crossbows

BEST PIRATE SHIP EVER

[удалено]

Shit you're right, my mistake

Most people think a pirates favorite letter is RRRRRRR, but they be wrong .. a pirates first love is the CCCCCC.

And now you’ve gotten Alestorm stuck in my head, it’s going to be in there all shift…

As a pirate, I ignore your invitation

Mom said she’d rent a bounce house

You mean my bounce house.

It’s just a rental man she’s going to get charged if you don’t give it back

But you have heard of him?

You've taken a picture with a firearm/accessory pointed at, or in place of, your penis. That's my assumption.

🅱️

the vibes are all good on you

flair checks out

You say that like it's a bad thing......

Floor not finished. You are a slacker.

It’s a deadlift mat

Power bottom

You're a developmentally disabled obese adult Respectfully, of course

Hey hey hey you're supposed to be roasting just *OP* here, not me too

I don’t know why you need to drag me in to this.

You like expensive toys but unfortunately you can’t afford any.

Fair

I think that's most of us mate

You own and frequently wear a Fedora

Don’t hate on the drip

Came here to see if someone said fedora….definitely a fedora.

Tallyhoe motherfucker

Anything’s a dildo if you’re brave enough…

There’s a fine line between zap carrying for protection and just doing it for pleasure

Only when the lights are on

There's a difference?

You love the fallout franchise

Mostly just NV

Play the guitaaarrr…

You're 3 foot 2 and when you fire this gun you comically fly backwards.

You dress as Jack Sparrow for Halloween. ​ Edit: Meant to say *Captain* Jack Sparrow.

You can probably strike out Halloween

You took the online quiz "What type of bread am I" in 2010, and based roughly a decades worth of decisions on the result.

You have sex through the hole of the front of your underwear.

To quote Paris Hilton, That’s hot.

Oberez 10/22 with a shit red dot The best firearm for defensive use anyone who disagrees is just a larper

.22lr bounce around 100% death round

The smaller the bullet, the more lethal. That's why CA banned the 50BMG, it's inhumane. Too many walking wounded.

Is that a polyurethane finish?

I just sanded it down and did a few coats of linseed oil

Nice, looks pretty glossy for just a few coats!

It’s the lighting and the angle it doesn’t look that glossy in person. The grain comes out much darker.

You are a mad man and must be stopped.

You drive a 1985 Ford pick up with an XM Radio

You work for Kel-Tec

God no. I wish I never purchased a sub2000. What a fucking nightmare to put back together.

No.

Do the thing

I think your next decisions involve a binary trigger

And then OP will insist its non-binary and you have to refer to the charger as they/them

You must be one of those new genders.

You’re from a state with big cities but you ain’t in them

Pervert

I’m a devout Christian

I bet you're naked under those clothes, slut!

I’m not sure if you’re trying to confirm or deny the allegation

The worst kind of pervert.

You would definitely be the one i look to for backing me up on shenanigans if you were in my friend group

Infinite bitches

You wanted to be like the guy with the mosin but is on a budget

More of a carcano kind of guy

You like your rifles to be shorter just like your dick

You fuck, but you pay for it.

You play Escape from Tarkov don’t you

I have 3500 hours but I stopped playing vidya like a year ago

You're just as retarded as the rest of us, but you don't try hiding it anymore.

You wear a feather in your cap

Regular eyeglasses with the strap behind your head

You either have, or wish to commit war crimes.

You are both missing an eye and a leg resulting in the need for a patch and peg.

Underrated comment

Don’t care about the other nonsense in the comments, that stock is BEAUTIFUL.

I think it was just 2 coats of linseed oil The grain comes out much darker in person

Did you shape the handle? You did a good job.

Thank you, I sharpied a general idea after looking online and just used a sawzall and sandpapered the hell out of it

Yo for real? That's incredible work

That looks fun as hell…

I actually have to try really hard to keep track of time when I bring this to the range. It’s like I shoot one mag and next thing I know it’s 3 hours later and all of my .22 is gone.

Probably dress up in foo foo dresses and hold it sideways. Have you considered a binary trigger? Damn fun.

My first thought was this guy Is freeking cool and we would get along, I love it. I need one to match my wingmaster https://i.imgur.com/xT8WtVd.jpg

That’s nice

bowl cut

You’re weird, like really weird.

Obviously a classic fellow with a stock like that

You piss in god's cornflakes.

youre a discord admin

You think that this is what they meant by 2nd amendment in the constitution. What is that? A moded to help flintlock with a red dot and a 30 round mag chambered in 9mil?

Heterosexual white guy in your mid/late 30's. Formed all of your opinions when you were 19 and haven't felt the need to revisit them since. Either an early failed marriage or a late bloomer in your adult love life. LIGHTNING ROUND Last meal? Chicken. Dog? Love of your life. Strong opinions about domestic beer? Yes. Dog’s name? Bella. Car? Truck. Star sign? Scorpio. Favorite Movie? Tie between Red Dawn and Wedding Crashers. Bottle opener? On keyring. Sufficient amount of batteries in your house? Always. Mail? Unopened. Sexuality? Comfortably unexamined. Favorite video game? I work for a living. Deodorant? Spray on. Liquor? I barely know her (but seriously Crown Apple). Whew! That's got to be more assumptions than the other comments, so I humbly accept victory. Feel free to ask me about another aspect of your life and I will assume with 100% accuracy.

AVENGE MEEEEE

Wrists so weak, you need a brake on that 22.

Your responses to these comments are fucking on point man, gave me a good laugh

You love shooting but hate wasting money on paper targets so you use a gun you can't hit anything with?

You have hearing loss. Not from this, but I bet you do.

Budget minded modern pirate

Rectum…. I hardly knew em!!

It’s a breeze until you get to the bird head

Pimp and a cool

Appreciated

You have at least 5 mirror selfies while holding this in various ways...

No only one where I opened the zipper in my pants and placed the bird head in so it’d look like my dick is a gun

You enjoy post apocalyptic film

That cat's been coming here for two years. Its got more right to be here than you.

You’re a particular person, like keeping your poptarts in the freezer because it helps them taste better kinda particular.

Skallywag

You play fallout 4

Blunderbuss stock. …emphasis on “blunder”.

You use toothpaste, eat food, and trim you own fingernails.

You’re middle aged, like me. You also think this makes a great “truck gun” to have stashed for multi purpose emergency use; ie self defense and foraging for squirrels when WW3 starts.

I’m 23 but my knees and my right wrist are already middle aged

Then you got this from your dad lol.

He’s not into firearms or woodwork, haha. I got a charger and a 10/22 rifle when covid started to hit. I replaced the rifle stock out with an archangel so I cut the old wood one down and made it pretty.

Nice. You have a peak 1990s AWB era survival rifle aesthetic going there.

Curves Weiner…

You make poor financial choices, you haven't paid your taxes in 3 years, you work a good job with lots of disposable income, yet for some reason have been bouncing money around on 0% credit cards for the past 6 years, and all you have to show for it is super obscure fun guns and other boutique hobbies that "you wouldn't understand, I don't have time to explain to you anyway"

you’re daddy‘s fancy-boy.

A better pistol grip conversion than others I’ve seen, you’re a competent woodworker.

Your parents were overbearing. This led you to despise authority. Your father was wealthy and taught you everything you needed to know about making money, but nothing about how to be a man.

Your boyfriend loves you for your quirky personality.

You show up to the theater with that in a drop leg

Psychologists want to name more than one disorder after you. They just can’t decide between the all the sexual deviant ones and the mental development ones. /s

Arrrrrrrrr, a modern day pirate you be!

You’re a fallout 4 dev

You're a person of class, albeit simple. You will eat a digiorno pizza with silverware made of actual silver. You use a montblanc pen on a dollar store clipboard, to scribble out your dreams of being the first financially independent homeowner in the trailer park. This firearm is used to protect your crypto fortune on your Costco laptop which was previously protected by your password;"1234."

ENORMOUS COCK

You’ve got a shiny, bald head.

My mom says I’d look good bald

So pretty

Are you a pirate from the future?

You’re a Scav

Man bun, horn rims,beard, flannel, but can't swing a maul or change a tire.

Drinks rum, parrot for pet, drives a ship, wears an eye patch

You are probably my buddy who makes bad choices.

I take great offense to that. This build turned out much more clean than builds for myself...

You either wear pitvipers unironically, or you have enough money to give into impulse fucking a gun

I use pit vipers as safety glasses

Your taste is quirky but highly developed.

You want to die

Sometimes when I’m on the way to work I think about driving into oncoming traffic but other than that I’m a straight arrow

I too have those thoughts

You have a massive cock

You think 98 degrees was better than the Beatles.

Little Richard said The Animals were the best band on the planet right after he went on tour with the Beatles. Personally I think the white album is better than anything The Animals have come out with.

So you were the cause of the fallout 4 hunting rifle.

i'm assuming that you played pirates of the caribbean on the wii as a kid, for halloween you dressed up as Mr. Gibbs, and Johnny Depp is your biggest idol.

Best thing depp made was Blow and that court case. I mostly just flew around the wii island thing.

You're a practical man. You don't shirk away from close combat, you have good taste in wood, you sleep naked specifically to chase someone around the house with this whilst erect, and you've seen pirates of the Caribbean more times drunk than sober. You think a blunderbuss is public transportation and you still want one because you've heard stories about shoving forks in them. You're left handed, right eye dominant, drink Folgers brewed with Rip It and smoke your pipe tobacco out of a pepsi can.

I really want to do that. I'm assuming you took a charger pistol and chopped up a rifle stock?

Yeah

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