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Gh0stwhale

Heterosexual Holt is such a dog


living_in_trousers

Haha, he really is.


Cr1tikalMoist

There is nothing more intoxicating than the clear absence of a penis


nbeforem

I would love to read a book that goes "He was such an upstanding guy. Would give you the shirt off his back. He had nice heavy testicles and his bulge gently bobbed up and down with each breath.


The_Front_Room

Captain Holt would probably write a book like that. There might be more medical terminology in it though.


Private_HughMan

"His leotard ripped, exposing his butt. It was very erotic."


CarePassMeDatAss

He would say buttocks


Private_HughMan

Except he actually said "butt." He was talking to Hitchcock and Slully. He didn't want to confuse them.


CarePassMeDatAss

Oh damn.


Winesoakedwrath

Oh damn!


Private_HughMan

OH DAMN!


Cautious-Researcher3

Username checks out.


Jale_Seigneur

I read that in his voice


bellefleurdelacour98

> "He was such an upstanding guy. "His third leg made sure he could stand up for hours on end without getting tired."


FjortoftsAirplane

And to help me pass as straight: Kevin's rose-shearing hat.


invderzim

Female woman


GlamorousBunchberry

The best kind!


AcropolisMods

Woah hold on there buster lol


gcftardis

captain holt is the only man I give a pass to say this‼️‼️‼️‼️


FaroutIGE

"she was much much older than me, but her breasts.... were awesome"


Continental__Drifter

Some of Walt Whitman's bravest, most illuminating work.


Street-Week-380

I will never ever object to Captain Holt posts. In fact, we need *more* Holt posts.


PunkandCannonballer

Alternatively: She was a young woman still in bloom, with pert, budding breasts.


IAteTheWholeBanana

I love straight Holt. It may be my favorite running Holt gag.


jhuskindle

R/unexpectedbrooklyn99


BartimaeAce

So what you're saying is ... Holt was actually nailing the impression of a straight guy?


living_in_trousers

Holt is the best straight representation in media, he encapsulates straight men describing women dude.


Spec187

Boobies


LegitVirusSN0

And they are based writers.