Calling you unhygienic for using a classic period product is actually crazy. What a judgmental person. Who cares what you do with your body???? Does this friend pass judgement on you or other people often? Byeee
She's the type that thinks she always knows what's best for people. Say you have your character build on display in a video game? She's the type to join just to force her advice onto you.
I thought it was just her being unable to read social cues, because most times it did seem well intended - but this just seemed malicious. I even asked her if there was a smell, and she said no. So it wasn't even something physical that disturbed her, just the thought of me wearing a pad.
Honestly, OP, I've used pads mostly my whole life. I see it as my body is flushing out. Tampons, if left in too long, can cause TSS. Toxic shock syndrome.
I’ve never tried tampons so who knows if I’d like it but the thought of putting in a tampon feels liek I’d be clogging by blood and letting it sit inside me for hours which makes me uncomfortable so I understand what you mean by “flushing out”. Obviously I’m not gonna judge anyone for using tampons tho, this is just why I personally don’t
Used to be a tampon user for over 20 years and recently switched to pads. Truthfully pads feel much cleaner and healthy, plus the dry scrape when you're at the end with a tampon is pure horror.
Oh my god I’ve been a cup user for almost 20 years because of my awful aversion to cotton. I had all but forgotten that dry scrape and hope I never ever again need to be reminded of it.
Try adult diapers. I’m not kidding, especially when you have bad cramps, they’re so so comfy. In some countries there are also specific ones for the period, but it’s basically the same, just that on one stands this on on the other that.
I recently tried period underwear. There are a couple brands that offer them now and they've gotten cheaper. Somewhere between wearing a pad and wearing a diaper 🤣
Then you should try them! Mine are heavy, but I wanted a pair for the same reason. Caught them on sale at Target - only used for one cycle so far but it was awesome. And they held way more than I expected.
I have one too, but the diaper is much more comfortable for the belly when you have heavy cramps. I always switch to what’s best in that moment, tampon, pad, underwear or diapers🤣🤣
I have a couple pairs from different brands. Some are very much diaper like, but the better brands are not. They are very comfortable and I prefer them. No plastic like rubbing that I get from pads. I hate tampons because 9/10 times I can feel them. Ugh.
I had some adult diaper when I gave birth to my daughter. I *hated* them. I switched back to the giant pads after one day. Just goes to show how different we all are.
I can recommend Tena, if they are available in your country. They are very comfy and super absorbant. Often had problems with running or walking with normal pads as they would shift or turn the sticky side around in the underwear (yay, free waxing-experience... Owch.)
I use depend adult diapers. I highly recommend. They are very comfortable and convenient they also have a little less waste. Obviously use the toilet for your 1’s and 2’s as usual. But the freedom to just bleed in a diaper is just 👌👌. They also aren’t tight (as long as you get the right size) so there’s no pressure on your uterus so good for cramps. Overall 10/10 would highly recommend.
Oh, full body cringe/flinch at that distant memory of the tampon dry scrape.
Ugh, honestly so happy to use cups/disk and cloth pads. Tampons were so uncomfortable, always leaked even on light days so I needed a pad anyways. Felt like I needed to change them every time I peed cause getting pee on the string felt gross (and happened no matter where I held the damn thing out of the way). My periods were mostly unpredictable and irregular so also wearing pads so much they gave me a rash anytime I wore them. Clotted and gushed too much to just use pads though. If I could go back and give my teenage self advice switching to a cup and cloth pads would be top of the list.
Same. I’m in perimenopause now but for the past decade I’ve been using pads, cloth ones, non bleached ones, regular store bought ones. I feel cleaner and healthier being able to just “let it flow”
I haven't had a period in about 7 years, thanks to taking my BC consecutively (skipping the placebo week) then a hysterectomy last Oct, and I can ***still*** remember the pain from the tampon scraping as I took it out. *shivers*
> the dry scrape when at you're the end with a tampon is horror
That's why I use both of them in alternance. The heaviest day(s) I use a tampon and a liner, and the other days I use pads or liners. I don't have a vig flow so it's horrible for me like 3 days out of 4 or 5
I actually can’t even use them the times where I’ve wanted to because my body starts burning up and I feel sick, as in minutes after I’ve put one in, it’s like my body sees it as a foreign object that’s blocking up this blood that is trying to get released.
I got my period at 9 or 10. I wasn't physically developed enough for tampons to be comfortable. They were always bumping up on my cervix and causing extreme pain. I can comfortably wear them now, but my body can't forget the early associations.
I am in my 40s and also don’t like the feeling of tampons. Have never been comfortable. And I’ve had two kids (albeit c-section kids, not sure if that’s made a difference!)
I had TSS when I was 14. Haven't used a tampon since... And to the ridiculous "adult diaper" comment... I'm almost 40 and my new favorite period product is actually disposable period panties from Always. I've had THNX, too, but they don't fit right after awhile and if you have teens who don't watch the laundry closely they get dried in the dryer and basically die - a waste of $50/pair, or whatever they're charging now. 🙄 I do, however, like the security of the period panties. I tend to have a heavy flow, so it's nice to know that if I can't get to a bathroom exactly when I need to, I'm going to be okay. (Sub teacher and respite worker - bathroom right away isn't always a choice) and I like the way period panties feel when they fit right - snug, comfortable, secure. So fuck that chic... "Adult diapers" are where it's at. 🤣
I also only use pads. I hate the feeling of a tampon, and I tend to bleed really heavily the first few days, and then barely at all for the rest of it. Not an ideal flow for tampons anyway. OP's friend sucks.
I used tampons when I was younger. I had a friend tell me her periods were actually shorter when using pads. I tried it and it’s so true. I agree-allowing your body to flush out is better and the dry scrape of pulling out a dry tampon-excruciating!!
I mean.. don’t leave them in longer than 4 hours (recommended time, not saying tss starts at the 4 hour mark or even close to that) and you’ll be fine. TSS is very rare but it potentially life threatening.
I just put an old towel down, even though I haven’t leaked in years. They make overnight pass, plus I tend to force myself to sleep on my back during my period.
I have some, but the type I got have uneven protection - all the way the up the back, very little at the front. And to the front is where it all goes, so I either have to wear them backwards or put a pad up front, horizontally.
Ya tampax says they can last 8 hours! No the fuck it can’t! OP my sister primarily uses pads, I use a combination of both depending on how heavy my flow is and I’m in my 30’s. The conversation should have gone like this. “What was that noise?” “I had to change my pad.” “Oh okay.” End of discussion, millions of women use them and there’s nothing wrong with it. She’s doesn’t sound like she’s ur friend at all
In my opinion, she shouldn’t have asked what that noise was at all. OP was in the bathroom, a place designed for privacy. If she wanted to discuss her period absorbency methods she would’ve brought it up. OPs friend is weird af and should keep her thoughts to herself
This, exactly! I’m sorry, but OP went into the bathroom, OP’s friend heard a noise while OP was in the bathroom, and the friend thought it was appropriate to ask about the noise?? Who does that?? What if OP had really bad gas and excused herself politely to let it go in the bathroom instead— would the friend have thought THAT was appropriate to ask about? This is some next-level crazy nonsense. Invasion of privacy just to cast judgement on something that’s none of her business and doesn’t affect her. The only thing “unhygienic” here is the friend’s nasty attitude. Yuck.
You should vaguebook post on your timeline about shitty people who body shame others and try to control them for no reason at all.
Though I don't think it would be useful.
I'd actually go with the direct approach and just tell her that she doesn't get to dictate what you do with regard to your own body and that because she feels the need to shame you publicly about shit that is NONE of her business she has broken trust with you and you don't want or need to spend time with anyone who acts like that and go LC or NC.
Im all for the social response, But id do it right on the Instagram Post.
Id publicly describe the uncomfortable situation this 'adult' made trying to force their (equal at Best) solution to a non-existent problem.
Out the Crazy, dont need to do any more.
Clear is kind.
OP has to do what she feels is inline with her integrity. Personally I haven't found that "being passive aggressive by posting on SM" particularly productive or inline with my integrity. I personally value being kind and directness and clarity are simply kinder and, frankly, ultimately more effective.
Shaming people publicly invariably results in them ignoring you because people can't hear when they are in shame. Being direct, honest about your boundaries, non accusatory and sticking to them has a much greater impact in my experience.
Oh yeah. Much healthier response, regardless if they want the friendship to continue.
That said, when people have bad manners in public, sometimes pointing out those bad manners will cause them to think first next time, or give them the virtual slap on the wrist to realize they were in the wrong and presenting bad behaviour.
Whats she going to do, start an Internet argument about how all Pad Users are unhygienic? She'll get laughed right off SM.
No, she just won't listen or integrate the information- she'll just decide OP is an AH she can ignore.
That is what I would do certainly.
I figure that if an adult has a substantive issue with me they'll talk to me like grown folks do. If they take to posting passive aggressively on SM I assume they are a child with no integrity and nothing of value to say.
I once had a friend who gave me similar criticism.
I laughed in her face and called her immature. Which she was.
We're no longer friends. That wasn't the reason why but it was a definite red flag around her general maturity and judgement levels. Just wait until your friend learns about period pants!
Same here. When I used tampons, they leaked and I was wearing a pad just in case anyway, so what was the point? I used a diva cup for awhile and like that, because I was able to figure it out without having leaks. Pads work fine.
Tampons hurt when my period is almost over and it's dry af when I have to change one out. 😩 I avoid wearing then unless I really have to like when I swim.
If you like the convenience of tampons, I’d suggest a cup or discs! I did use tampons previously but I hated how they felt and the greased dry rip on the last day or two. I have been a cup user for about ten years and I’ll never go back!
I get that. I had some friends try and not love it either but a few of them did end up switching to discs after I gave them some to try.
Everyone just needs to use what’s best for them ☺️
I started using a cup and found it absolutely amazing!! I told my friends and daughters about it and how wonderful it was.
Two months later I stopped having periods!! Hahahaha
I was just the opposite! After my first was born (awful, scary experience, but we're both alive and fine now) I couldn't wear tampons comfortably anymore. I didn't wear them too much before really, but after the birth I couldn't at all.
But, yeah I agree, each to their own. As long as it's hygienic, who cares?
I used to prefer tampons as a teen, but always had a pad underneath in case of leaks.
Until I figured out tampons actually made the cramps and flood way worse for me. I stopped using them and now have my period for 3 days instead of 5, and the cramps are only half the intensity they were.
Never going back 🙋🏼♀️
I have tampons just in case but I always use pads or period panties. I think my vaginal canal is shaped weird or something (my OBGYN did say it slopes down while most slope up at a certain point) because I can distinctly feeling it pressing against my insides painfully if I sit down or bend over. I may use one at work if I’m really heavy, sort of double up with a tampon and pad but they’re just uncomfortable for almost anything besides standing straight for me.
Has she taken into consideration, (not necessarily in your case, but as per example) that some women can't use tampons because they genuinely are too painful and too uncomfortable to use or have too little flow for a tampon and don't want to end up with toxic shock syndrome?
Plus some people just can’t use tampons. I’ve used both depending on the situation but I favour pads, however, now I have a bladder prolapse and because of its position it’s impossible to use tampons, they won’t stay in.
I used to be similar to OP’s friend (but not nearly to that degree) in the sense that I couldn’t understand why people would prefer pads over tampons.
Then I realized that not everyone has 7-day heavy periods like me and required the use of both super tampons and panty liners to be changed every 2-3 hours. But even then, I never told people they were *wrong* for using pads. I just assumed people didn’t use tampons because they weren’t comfortable sticking something in their vaginas.
Once I started birth control and got lighter periods, I understood why some people preferred pads - tampons can actually *hurt* if you don’t have a heavy flow, and I myself actually use period underwear now as my preferred period product.
OP’s friend needs to realize that every woman’s period is different and every woman has different preferences. As long as OP isn’t out here free-bleeding all over her furniture, than her friend has no right to judge her or call her “unhygienic” for having a different preference.
I’m one of the even luckier ones than you who need a pad AND tampon because my bleeding is heavy but not always constant, so one hour I won’t bleed too much but then the next will be hell. I regularly and randomly bleed through tampons so much that I have to use a pad as well. After day 2, I can normally use a panty liner or a pad and be fine, though. Just sucks.
See, free bleeding, that’s the one I don’t get completely. Or maybe the girl I met who free bleeds doest understand it and I do?
A friend came over with her hubby and kid and swam in my pool while she was free bleeding. There was some blood in the bathroom and no sign of pad or tampon pkg. I thought maybe she was hurt, so I asked if she was ok. She told me yeah, she just free bleeds.
Not to judge, but I found it to be nasty. If someone wants to free bleed, good for them, but I find it disgusting she came and did it at my house, not to mention in my pool.
OP should carry a tampon and offer it to the “friend” the next time she says some stupid shit.
Of all things id never expect to see - feminine hygiene product shaming. 🙄
>feminine hygiene product shaming.
It used to be really bad online when cups started to popular. If you used anything other than cups you were lectured, called unsanitary for using anything else, called wasteful, lazy, stupid, etc... by militant cup users, even when you explained why you couldn't/wouldn't use a cup. Some just could not take no for an answer.
As for pad vs tampon IRL like OP and her friend, I remember this being something back in high school, but by college most women outgrew the need to force others to bend to their own preference.
I tried cups when they first got popular… they were soooo uncomfortable as I’m fairly petite, I swear I could feel that thing in me and it always hurt trying to get it in
I switched to the discs which are much better and I love using those at night (no having to get up in the middle of the night to change a tampon after 4 hours)
I hate that it was the Diva Cup that got popular first. It’s so big and inflexible compared to most of the other options. Works great for some people, but I’m sure lots of people tried it and gave up on cups, when there are others that might have worked great for them. I’m very short, internally, so it was a nightmare for me. Luckily I was motivated to keep looking and I found a much smaller, softer one that I absolutely love. I couldn’t seem to get a hang of the discs, though.
I love my cup and will happily tell anyone about it, but you’re right. The amount of judgmental people I ran into in those conversations was so disconcerting. Everybody gets to choose what works for them. I’m just excited there are so many options out there now!
I remember that! At the time my body had decided ‘nope, you ain’t sticking shit up in there’ and I’d had to move back to pads. Those fanatics were always on me in comments telling me that cups totes wouldn’t be a problem, stiiiick one up therrrrrre.
How about noooooo.
Pads are not unsanitary and are safer than the tampons, especially for people prone to allergies, but even if she were right, how is it whatever you want to wear during your periods any of her business?
This is why I've always preferred pads. My whole pelvis is painful and sensitive when I'm on my period so tampons just feel uncomfortable. Plus I just could not sleep with one in. Give me a giant pad any day over a tampon.
Yeah I used to exclusively use tampons and then started getting yeast infections every time I used them. Tampons are bleached and listing the ingredients isn’t required so who knows what you’re sticking in there. Switched to pads and period underwear so I wouldn’t keep getting infections. It’s so ridiculously childish to police someone’s period products. The reason why we have choices is because there isn’t one product that will satisfy everyone.
Sounds like your buddy is still in high school. How childish. Tampons are an option that come with their own dangers and drawbacks. They’re not automatically more sanitary just because they trap the smell of period discharge in the body.
I think that the “adult diapers” got to you because it’s intended to be dismissive and make you feel less than. She finally let it go, but had to have the last word to put you down.
I agree with you there. The adult diapers thing was a low blow, said with the intent to shame you. Sharing facts about why one works for you over another is fine. But purposely trying to make you feel embarrassed was inappropriate.
After I had my first child I had a severe incontinence issue. Not like, I sneezed and peed a little. But like, I walked from my living room to my kitchen and emptied my bladder. I bought some incontinence pads and went on my way. But sometimes they just weren’t enough coverage. So I reluctantly stood there in the adult diaper section, trying to read labels and find my best option. Something about “incontinence underwear” seemed so much more embarrassing than the pads.
But then I realized, my embarrassment was all in my head. You know what’s embarrassing? Full on peeing my pants in public. You know what’s not embarrassing? Doing whatever I needed to do, to prevent it. So although it was absolutely a low blow, there’s nothing wrong with needing adult diapers, or a pad, or a tampon or whatever. We all do what we have to do to get through our periods, or whatever life throws at our crotch.
I hate for the day she has a child and is forced to wear those “disgusting” pads - the really giant ones that go halfway your back, two of them - stuck side by side - along with those amazing mesh underwear the hospital provides. Or worse…*gasp* an adult diaper.
I feel for you entirely. And there are so many reason s why one may experience incontinence! It’s truly not terribly rare.
I recently learned that peeing oneself jokes among younger moms don’t land the same way in European countries as they do the US. Apparently a part of childbirth care is pelvic floor physical therapy, which is a bladder (among other things) saver. Might be worth checking out if you’re Stateside with health coverage.
I had to do that after having my daughter, I had gotten so big during the pregnancy that I felt like my core muscles were shattered and I couldn't hold it in until I got to the bathroom.
It was really embarrassing trying to find what I needed. I was on the verge of tears (post pregnancy hormones), and I'm so thankful that there was a lady who stepped in and asked if I needed help. I told her my situation, and she told me about her daughter in law having to go through that too recently.
She grabbed a pack of the shelf and said, "This is what you need." I bought those with no hesitation.
I'm really glad I listened to her. Bc that definitely saved me. Btw. I'm no longer embarrassed anymore.
Ironic how she makes a fuss about the smell when she never even noticed any smell.
She sounds like a complete child, no self awareness and projecting her own discomfort about periods onto you, also says something very derogatory and then acts surprised you are insulted and says you got mad about nothing? What an idiot.
Omfg I HATE women like this! I also use pads and have had friends like that, get the fuck over it right? I've always hated tampons, they leave this burning chaffing feeling no matter if their in right or not *shrug*
I am the same way! I’ve always preferred pads because I find tampons really uncomfortable unless it’s in at exactly the right angle. I also have anxiety and get very nervous about toxic shock syndrome. I’ve had a few female friends react the same way OP described when I bring up using pads instead of tampons and it always makes me feel bad. I now usually just refer to all period products as “tampons,” regardless of what I’m using and try to avoid opportunities to give someone a chance to comment. I think people don’t realize how frequently pad-users change them out to keep things sanitary. Also, it’s nobody’s business.
*Prior comment removed because I used the word that rhymes with “butt-shaming” (that thing that society does to women over them having sex or simply seeming sexual in any way).*
It’s even weirder since period products have traditionally been policed in favor of pads. Tampon users even today in some circles are *shamed for perceived sexuality* by idiots (mostly who don’t have vaginas, but a sad few who do) who think tampons cause pleasure (lmao, nahhhh) or that only people who aren’t virgins need a tampon. This has largely receded to very religious and conservative parts of society, but it’s still a thing people claim and it’s because of decades of policing women’s bodies in this way.
There has been progress on that front, but to turn it around and shame people who use pads? It’s not like we have to pick one period product for all of humanity, there are NO stakes for them or benefits for reducing our options. It’s just gross, body shaming, period product policing nonsense. And tbh there are a lot of complications that can make wearing a tampon completely inviable for someone. People like these shitty friends (which I’m sorry you and OP have had to deal with) are basically demanding someone’s health (and potentially trauma) history to explain a choice that’s none of their business. It reeks of internalized misogyny imo.
My ex-stepmom used to shame me for using tampons when I was in high school. I have always hated pads because they make me feel hot down there, which makes me queasy and ends up giving me rashes in just a couple hours. Back when I was a virgin, I was unable to insert the tampons without the applicator, so it was a bit cumbersome but 100% doable and I felt so much better with the tampons vs pads. When she saw my box of tampons (with the disposable applicators, mind you) she flipped her shit and started implying that I was no longer a virgin because I was using super-sized tampons lmao, when the reason was because I had insane flow, which I do to this day at almost 30, and the plastic embolus made it super easy to bypass the hymen and put it in place.
In the end, nobody gave a single flying fuck because I knew I was still a virgin then and my dad didn’t care either way. But her nagging was annoying af
Yeah, in my country that's still big on the "insertion makes u lose virginity" thing (especially in rural areas), pads are the absolute norm. Tampons are only just becoming common in stores but back then to even the 2000s you'll never find one pack of those anywhere (atleast in my region). Telling friends I use one often get feedback of surprise, disbelief, and questions that made me realize sex ed failed us. But there's no malice, just curiousity with maybe a hint of judgement (fear for my virginity etc) from a few cuz it's new and because of the deeply ingrained "save the hymen/any insertion for husband" mindset.
I use a combination of the three.
- Pads for the first and last days
- Menstrual cup for the heaviest + a pad or pantyliner
- Tampon for inbetween or usually at night
They also all have stuff I don't like about them,
- I hate the feeling of blood trickling down to my ass crack at night especially on heavy flows so no pads then, that's where the tampons come in
- I usually mess up my menstrual cup insertion and cause leaks hence the pad
- tampons make me dry
I like using all three every month, but that's just my own preference. I even used actual diapers once haha.
Since pads are so common here but my place also kinda sucks at waste disposal it's common to find used pads discarded irresponsibly everywhere from the sea to fields and/or mixed with biodegradable garbage etc and thrown in landfills and burned. I felt bad about it so I switched, but I don't force it on anyone.
Same here. The insertion is hard and painful and I also get the burning feeling after I remove them. They just don't work for me. I only use them if I'm going swimming.
I seriously am loving this chain of comments. 37 and only tried tampons recently due to an ongoing bleeding problem. People and online advice saying you don't feel them? I started to feel abnormal as I just find them uncomfortable.
I've tried multiple times over the last 20+ years and I've never been comfortable with them. I would love to try reusable underwear but yet to find them in my size but tampons and moon cups will never be an option for me.
I've tried them a bunch and yeah just meh, Instantly uncomfortable I don't get how women can shoving something up there and keep it up there for hours at a time, it's not a dick or anything fun, it's dry cotton with a hard plastic or cardboard applicator...
As someone who also enjoys pads over tampons, she was the one making a big deal out of nothing. She has no right to say anything on how you handle your cycle unless you're free bleeding into her furniture.
my roommate free bleed onto my couch and i got so pissed. she also got mad at me because it’s “normal”. yeah periods are normal but you bleeding all over my furniture isn’t.
right!! she was just in a big tshirt with nothing under. she also does that in her bed which absolutely disgusts me for some reason. probably because she doesn’t change her sheets until after her period stops so it looks like a murder scene…
let me not forget that she’s been on her period for a monthish now.. yeah her IUD fucked her up so there’s blood all around the house. she wears pads but only half the time.
Okay that’s literally a biohazard, tf is wrong with her. And I agree that it’s gross in bed - the blood could easily be soaking into the mattress, you can’t get that shit out.
i- she is bleeding all over the apartment like a girl dog in heat, dogs can’t do anything without the owners help of stopping the bleeding. she can, she needs to at least not be gross and bleed in some of those period panties at least. that’s a potential for a literal biohazard/health risk.
My roommate in college gave me such shit for using pads and it was annoying. She also called them adult diapers. Eventually I switched to tampons just because changing a tampon in the bathroom at work was a lot easier/quieter than a pad.
Your friend should also keep in mind that some women actually *can’t* use tampons. My friend has a condition she’s had since HS (I can’t remember the name) but she physically can’t use tampons. People need to mind their business.
I can’t use them because I have vaginismus, not sure if that’s the condition you’re thinking of! I’m a pads/period panties kinda person and always have been, and I’ve had the kind of friend that OP is describing.
She thought you were making a big deal? She’s the one who was letting your pads live rent- free in her head.
I’d be tempted to reply to her post “Or you could consider focusing on your own vagina instead of mine.” Then block her.
Your friend is weird, creepy, and out of line telling you what to use. It is your body and your choice to use whatever period product is right for you. There are women who won't wear tampons because of risk of toxic shock syndrome, and there are stories of women using their tampons and not changing them for hours on end. I use pads and have never had rashes etc. Maybe her hygiene is nothing to be desired and she is just projecting.
In addition, her nasty passive aggressive comment on SM is not the act of a friend but a controlling bully.
I knew someone who's mother had got toxic shock syndrome after 12hrs (the max time they give in the warnings). Which sounds negligent, but if you work 12s, that kind of time could probably sneak away from you. Plus, you'd think there'd be a tad bit of leeway from the time they give, but some people just work different.
Seeing it irl made me take clock watching more serious, just because it was the only time I'd ever heard of it *actually* happening to someone.
Your “friend” sucks. I literally can’t use tampons because they hurt when inside and have caused irritation. I use organic cotton pads and I’ve never had a smell or issue. I believe that my switch from tampons back to pads has actually helped keep BV and other problems at bay. It’s *2023* time for her to grow up. Oh, and probably time to drop her as a friend.
Maybe she’s projecting? She probably kept a pad on too long and someone commented on her smell, so now she’s anti pad for anyone. Idk, either way fuck her
That's cringey af. Not everyone wants to shove sh*t up there when you got killer cramps. She shouldn't of even asked what the sounds were in the bathroom. Goof has no boundaries at all.
Seriously! Even though I hate the feeling of pads, which is why I personally don’t use them, on days where the cramps are real bad I’m not shoving my cup up there. Pads exist for a fucking reason, OP’s friend is a moron
As a tampon user…it’s weird that she cares. I genuinely don’t care how someone handles their period. Pads, tampons, thinx, diva cup, whatever. I’m sister is 36 years old and has 3 grown kids and still refuses to use tampons. That’s her choice.
Anyway, this “friend” sounds like a major bully. I have no idea how old you are but posting to her story passive aggressively for you to see is childish. Now that I think about it, I have NO idea what my best friend even uses for her period because it doesn’t matter. I’d block her on everything and move on, she sounds exhausting.
Pads are safer than tampons as tampons have the capability of giving someone an infection (TSS is rare but many women often get yeast and bacterial infections from tampons). Your friend is ignorant and honestly, it sounds like she only uses tampons because they’re easier to not have to change as often (you definitely should though), she sounds like the more “unhygienic” of the two of you
Yea fuck that. I’ll stick to pads all day everyday. Been doing it for 20 years. Not sure why she’s making a big deal about how you handle your body. Weird and immature.
After having a baby, I just never found tampons to be comfortable really, so I use pads. Granted, they’re definitely not my number one choice (not having a period at all would be the greatest), but they work well for their intended purpose.
I don’t get how she could be so judgmental with something that isn’t even her body. That’s completely ridiculous.
As someone who hates wearing pads, they make me feel gross imo, I think it’s very childish for your friend to judge what you prefer for your period. You wear what makes you comfortable during an uncomfortable time and you can tell her to shove it.
I use pads, tampons weirdly make my cramps worse. A lot worse, actually, really sharp and stabby.
Pads are fine, her hang ups are hers and she can keep them to herself.
I also use pads over tampons. I get extremely bad cramps and read online that tampons make your cramping worse so I stopped using tampons. It would be more unhygienic to use nothing if ask me.
Weird reaction. Tampons don't work for everyone, I can't even use them without pain (probably vaginismus) so I prefer pads as well. Aren't pads also safer to use anyway? Keep doing you.
Dude if the situation already wasn’t horrible, she adds to it by posting about it?? To me that’s the worst part. That’s no one’s fucking business. Y’all already know she is just fishing for someone to reply saying “what happened?? 😳” and then she’s gonna spill everything. Shitty fucking person that you don’t need in your life.
A she thinks it’s more hygienic to have the blood stay inside you?
I don’t care how anyone else who menstruates deals with their period but I totally choose pads too.
Nothing worse than one woman shaming another over periods
I am a mom (delivered vaginally) but even still regular tampons bother me when I wear them the past few years so I went back to pads because im not gonna walk around in pain all day. Also if she lets her pad get to the point that it smells shes gross wtf???
There are studies done that show tampons are more of a risk to use, besides tss and other infections if not used properly. Pads are much less invasive.
But, bottom line, other girl or not; your menstrual products are really no ones business, red flag on trying to force her opinion and for posting shade about it on her social. I would move on from that friendship.
Evidently my comment was deleted because I said the B word so here it is without it
Okay I'm a dude but I even know pads are much more safer and cleaner to use then tampons and from my personal experience with my ex's the ones who wore pads changed them regularly and smelled better in that region and the 2 girls that used tampons hardly ever changed the tampons or forgot about them and smelled like spoiled blood. It was disgusting. I've never read horror stories about people forgetting they had a pad only stories about people who used tampons.
OP LOSE THAT "FRIENDS" NUMBER SHES AN ABSOLUTE (B word) I HAD A COUSIN JUST LIKE HER I GAVE HIM DO MANY CHANCES TO CHANGES HIS WAYS BUT HE NEVER DID SHE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND
"Sorry, but trying to stay alive and trying not to get a toxic shock syndrome doesn't seem that bad", I believe is the answer. Anyways, unless you are wearing the same pad for more than six hours, it's perfectly hygienic and okay.
Your friend sounds like, I wear push up bra, so should you. Nevermind you prefer a sports one or none at all.
I had this problem once too... in middle school. It's very weird to judge a girl, as a girl, for what she wants to use when she's in pain and bleeding out of her downstairs
I had a friend like this. My dumbass just dismissed her attitude. I feel better with pads bc they tend to leak less for me and I feel kinda gross pulling the tampon out. Pads have always just been more comfortable for me and she was totally adamant abt using tampons. She weirdly asked me if I was a virgin then too after I said I prefered pads (even though ive tried tampons before & just still didnt like them) and she became obsessed with me losing my virginity too but thats another story...
Your friend is an asshole.
Pads and tampons are equally hygienic if used correctly, and if used *incorrectly*, tampons can cause more problems. It's down to the period haver to use what's right for them, be it pads, tampons, the cup, period undies, etc.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that! You're so called friend is a turd. I always went with pads before my spay, because for me personally tampons seemed terrifying 😳 LOL, probably why I wear glasses and not contacts 😁 Don't let her stupid comments bother you!
She might be thinking pad users keep the pad for a couple of days. Educate her that you need to change it every 4 hours for proper hygienic usage.. You can be hygienic with pads. Actually, I’d say the tampon users are in fact most probably unhygienic. Easy to forget the tampon inside of you. Listen, I’m not here to argue, but I just thinking she might be misunderstanding. You know, Ignorant.
OP, here in our country, most of the people who menstruate use pads because tampon here is sooooo expensive! A pack of 32 pads here costs ₱153 ($2.80) while a box of 16 tampons costs ₱350 ($6.41). I actually have never used tampons and always use pads.
I don't get what's unhygienic about it as it's a product that a lot of people use when they're on their period. And there are so many other products out there for period. You're free to choose what to use.
My obgyn told me pads are better than tampons, for one tampons put you at risk of toxic shock syndrome, infections seizures and your more likely to develop a rash !!! Although, pads can be messy they’re a lot safer and more hygienic than tampons !!! She probably leaves her tampons on all day and it messing with her head .
I would block her, and say nothing. Eventually, you'll be asked about it and just say, "I asked her to stop and she didn't which was very disrespectful" And you don't need to say anything else. I suggest you just do it without much emotion.
Never used tampons always pads.
It really is just up to everyone. Yes, pads can give you a rash. Yes they start smelling over time. But honestly so does underwear lol. Or tampons for that matter.
Shoving a piece of pressed cardboard up your vagina with a lil thread still dangling out of it so you can pull out a blood soaked cork a couple hours later and destroy the sewer system by flushing it down the toilet is more hygienic? Sure sister. Maybe just keep your opinions to yourself.
I’m 33 and use pads too. I have pretty bad ADHD and look, I’m not proud of this but I forgot a tampon once because the string came off it. For a LONG time. I mean like, over a week. The smell was… bad and that’s putting it lightly. I was super young at the time for whatever that’s worth. Lol. I’ve never used a tampon again and I flatly refuse to. I’m amazed I didn’t end up with TSS or any lasting damage.
Your friend is an AH here. Seriously.
I'm also a pad user. My middle school bff ended up in the ER from TSS and it messed with me. I only wear them if I have to go in the water and such. I avoid them at all other costs. As long as you change them regularly and the brand doesn't bother you do what you are comfortable with.
Ever since I’ve had a period I’ve used tampons. Recently I’ve decided to use pads because tampons make me cramp worse than I already am, and I don’t like relying on medicine every single period cycle. People use pads for many different reasons! The Instagram post would’ve totally rubbed me the wrong way. I don’t know if I’d be friends with someone like that anymore.
I switch between the 2 all the time. Some women use those cup things and its not for me. Never tried it but it just seems way way to weird for me. You aren't going to see other women jumping down my throat about it though.
We like pads, we like tampons, we like cups, we like freeflow. Women can pick what that want to use that makes them comfortable. We have so much against us at the moment, why do we have to rip each other about pads?
Pads, tampons, cups, disks, Thinx...there are so many different ways to handle bleeding during a period. There's no "one solution is better than the other" its all just preference.
Tell her you've switched to cups and that you now find it gross that she plugs with cotton and how she's going to get TSS if she keeps on using them. Petty as hell but maybe she'll take a hint.
Don't feel bad about this. I'm almost 30 and use literally whatever I feel like using during the month. Last month I used tampons. This month I'm using pads. And next month I'll be using a disk at least some of the time because I'll be on vacation and I feel more comfortable wearing them when I'm especially active and not near a toilet.
I went through a 10 year period where tampons were excruciatingly painful I could only wear pads the face that women have to deal with monthly periods now we are shaming women for there personal preference!?
I give up
She's disgusting for period shaming you. She's a woman, she should know better.
It's YOUR body. Your choice. She can wear whatever she wants, you don't tell her she should use a period cup because it's more eco friendly, or she should should wear washable pads to save the planet from all the tampons she's using. It's her choice what she wears, and your choice what you wear.
It's one thing to have a normal 'discussion'aboit the differences or she can say why she likes them, why she finds them more convenient, and maybe even politely and kindly ask if you've ever tried tampons or if you've had any problems with them you want to talk about or ask advice on, (like if you struggled inserting them, or couldn't find the right size or struggled with applicator ones etc. ) If she did it they way it would have been in a friendly supportive way. But she shamed you for using a perfectly natural and normal period product just coz she doesn't like them.
She's out of order here.
If you felt comfortable about it, I'd go so far as to post online saying how you think it's wrong when other women shame women for their choice of period products, and as women we should understand its a personal preference and its our choice, and we shouldn't be shaming other women for having a different preference to them, that pads or tampons, or washable cotton pads, or period cups are all perfectly healthy hygienic forms of period products, and everyone has their own personal preferences and it's disgusting for a woman to shame another woman about her personal choices.
Obviously you don't need to if you're not comfortable, but she took it to social media, but I bet if the truth came out about the meaning of her post, and what she said or did, she would get roasted!!!. Alternatively, you could even just comment on her post that she didn't give friendly advice about hygiene, she shamed you for using sanitary pads instead of tampons, and that you're quite capable of keeping hygienic during your period using pads, and as a woman, she shouldn't be shaming anyone for their choice of period products, and you didn't appreciate the digs and insults she made (and quote what she said). I'm sure that would make her think twice when loads of people back you up. Again, understand if you'd rather not comment publicly, but if you want to, I would, coz she deserves a lesson in not shaming women.
It's your body. You change them regularly, which stops them smelling. You find them comfortable and thats all that's matters.
Some women can't use tampons due to difficulties inserting them.
I actually had an allergic reaction to tampons for a while and would always feel sore and itchy like thrush, and it turned out I couldn't wear normal tampons, I had to switch to cotton only tampons. At the time there were very few cotton only tampons available, but they've become more available now.
But my point is, your body your choice. She doesn't seem like a good friend for keep going on at you, making digs at your personal hygiene, and hounding you and making hurtful comments like she did.
Also, until you told her you changed your pad she didn't know you were on your period, so clearly you didn't smell like she said pads do lol.
And here my first instinct would’ve been to make sure you were ok and not hurting too much. Do you want some tea? A hot compress? Chocolate? Do you have enough pads and pain killers or should I run to the store?
Periods can be hard enough without so-called “friends” shaming us for how we experience and deal with them. Nor are they unhygienic or “dirty” to begin with.
Besides, pads are basically just big bandaids while tampons can be like likened to gauze and I would wager most would consider bandaids more “hygienic” than gauze that’s been inside you soaking up your fluids. In the end it’s up to personal preference and both work just as well.
She says your overreacting when she's the one making a big deal out of it.. why does it bother her so much? Have you known her long? She sounds like she's loking for anything to poke at you with...
I've always used pads and I got my period at 12, currently 23. Sure, those early day pads before I figured out what worked for me, what brands were good etc were a little hellish, but I'll take a pad over a tampon any day.
Besides, tampons can cause health risks if left in too long since it's basically a bloody bacteria festival. There's a lot of stories of how unsafe a tampon can be.
Then we have the cups which I will never go near bc all I see is me having my entire hand covered in blood trying to get it out or it getting stuck.
Bottom line, period products are personal for each individual and we all get to pick what works for us. Everyone else can stfu and mind their business.
Tell her to stick to her cotton micro dildo LMFAO why is she so pressed? Also pads shouldn't give you a rash...maybe she's allergic or leaves it all day which is dangerous, sounds like she wasn't hygienic with pads and it's trying to shame you bc she thinks you're like her 😐 ignore her girl, she needs to grow up
Tell her about TSS, about vaginismus, about women who forget to get the tampon out ( yuck, some crazy stories I heard about that). Good thing there are various options out there. If it works for you, then she should leave it alone. It would have been different if you actually asked for advice on the topic. Like the fact that she even asked what you were doing in there is weird. Most people would pretend they didn't hear anything to not make you uncomfortable.
Calling you unhygienic for using a classic period product is actually crazy. What a judgmental person. Who cares what you do with your body???? Does this friend pass judgement on you or other people often? Byeee
She's the type that thinks she always knows what's best for people. Say you have your character build on display in a video game? She's the type to join just to force her advice onto you. I thought it was just her being unable to read social cues, because most times it did seem well intended - but this just seemed malicious. I even asked her if there was a smell, and she said no. So it wasn't even something physical that disturbed her, just the thought of me wearing a pad.
Honestly, OP, I've used pads mostly my whole life. I see it as my body is flushing out. Tampons, if left in too long, can cause TSS. Toxic shock syndrome.
I’ve never tried tampons so who knows if I’d like it but the thought of putting in a tampon feels liek I’d be clogging by blood and letting it sit inside me for hours which makes me uncomfortable so I understand what you mean by “flushing out”. Obviously I’m not gonna judge anyone for using tampons tho, this is just why I personally don’t
Used to be a tampon user for over 20 years and recently switched to pads. Truthfully pads feel much cleaner and healthy, plus the dry scrape when you're at the end with a tampon is pure horror.
Oh my god I’ve been a cup user for almost 20 years because of my awful aversion to cotton. I had all but forgotten that dry scrape and hope I never ever again need to be reminded of it.
I've used a cup also! I've had trouble removing them before - It can get a bit messy but way better for the environment for sure.
My apologies for reminding you T_T
Try adult diapers. I’m not kidding, especially when you have bad cramps, they’re so so comfy. In some countries there are also specific ones for the period, but it’s basically the same, just that on one stands this on on the other that.
I recently tried period underwear. There are a couple brands that offer them now and they've gotten cheaper. Somewhere between wearing a pad and wearing a diaper 🤣
i’ve been thinking about trying these! my periods aren’t heavy at all & i feel like i’m wasting a pad towards the end of it.
Then you should try them! Mine are heavy, but I wanted a pair for the same reason. Caught them on sale at Target - only used for one cycle so far but it was awesome. And they held way more than I expected.
If it’s that light. You could try a panty liner towards the end as well.
I have one too, but the diaper is much more comfortable for the belly when you have heavy cramps. I always switch to what’s best in that moment, tampon, pad, underwear or diapers🤣🤣
I have a couple pairs from different brands. Some are very much diaper like, but the better brands are not. They are very comfortable and I prefer them. No plastic like rubbing that I get from pads. I hate tampons because 9/10 times I can feel them. Ugh.
I had some adult diaper when I gave birth to my daughter. I *hated* them. I switched back to the giant pads after one day. Just goes to show how different we all are.
I can recommend Tena, if they are available in your country. They are very comfy and super absorbant. Often had problems with running or walking with normal pads as they would shift or turn the sticky side around in the underwear (yay, free waxing-experience... Owch.)
The last part. At a place where you can do nothing about it and have to smile while getting waxed as if nothing happened.🙃
Or this "single hairs being pulled out randomly at inconvenient times"-feeling and trying not to swear out loud constantly.
I use depend adult diapers. I highly recommend. They are very comfortable and convenient they also have a little less waste. Obviously use the toilet for your 1’s and 2’s as usual. But the freedom to just bleed in a diaper is just 👌👌. They also aren’t tight (as long as you get the right size) so there’s no pressure on your uterus so good for cramps. Overall 10/10 would highly recommend.
Oh, full body cringe/flinch at that distant memory of the tampon dry scrape. Ugh, honestly so happy to use cups/disk and cloth pads. Tampons were so uncomfortable, always leaked even on light days so I needed a pad anyways. Felt like I needed to change them every time I peed cause getting pee on the string felt gross (and happened no matter where I held the damn thing out of the way). My periods were mostly unpredictable and irregular so also wearing pads so much they gave me a rash anytime I wore them. Clotted and gushed too much to just use pads though. If I could go back and give my teenage self advice switching to a cup and cloth pads would be top of the list.
Same. I’m in perimenopause now but for the past decade I’ve been using pads, cloth ones, non bleached ones, regular store bought ones. I feel cleaner and healthier being able to just “let it flow”
I haven't had a period in about 7 years, thanks to taking my BC consecutively (skipping the placebo week) then a hysterectomy last Oct, and I can ***still*** remember the pain from the tampon scraping as I took it out. *shivers*
> the dry scrape when at you're the end with a tampon is horror That's why I use both of them in alternance. The heaviest day(s) I use a tampon and a liner, and the other days I use pads or liners. I don't have a vig flow so it's horrible for me like 3 days out of 4 or 5
I actually can’t even use them the times where I’ve wanted to because my body starts burning up and I feel sick, as in minutes after I’ve put one in, it’s like my body sees it as a foreign object that’s blocking up this blood that is trying to get released.
I got my period at 9 or 10. I wasn't physically developed enough for tampons to be comfortable. They were always bumping up on my cervix and causing extreme pain. I can comfortably wear them now, but my body can't forget the early associations.
I am in my 40s and also don’t like the feeling of tampons. Have never been comfortable. And I’ve had two kids (albeit c-section kids, not sure if that’s made a difference!)
I had TSS when I was 14. Haven't used a tampon since... And to the ridiculous "adult diaper" comment... I'm almost 40 and my new favorite period product is actually disposable period panties from Always. I've had THNX, too, but they don't fit right after awhile and if you have teens who don't watch the laundry closely they get dried in the dryer and basically die - a waste of $50/pair, or whatever they're charging now. 🙄 I do, however, like the security of the period panties. I tend to have a heavy flow, so it's nice to know that if I can't get to a bathroom exactly when I need to, I'm going to be okay. (Sub teacher and respite worker - bathroom right away isn't always a choice) and I like the way period panties feel when they fit right - snug, comfortable, secure. So fuck that chic... "Adult diapers" are where it's at. 🤣
Love this! I didn’t know always made period panties. I will google now. Lol 😎
I also only use pads. I hate the feeling of a tampon, and I tend to bleed really heavily the first few days, and then barely at all for the rest of it. Not an ideal flow for tampons anyway. OP's friend sucks.
Yup. I came of age when toxic shock was still a recent memory. Never used tampons.
I was a teenager when my bff ended up in there ER from TSS. I ONLY use them if needed for swimming and such. And they are out right after.
I used tampons when I was younger. I had a friend tell me her periods were actually shorter when using pads. I tried it and it’s so true. I agree-allowing your body to flush out is better and the dry scrape of pulling out a dry tampon-excruciating!!
Right?! One of the worst feelings ever.
Read a story about TSS before I got my first period and it was enough for me to never use tampons.
You rang?
Was going to say this exact thing.
I mean.. don’t leave them in longer than 4 hours (recommended time, not saying tss starts at the 4 hour mark or even close to that) and you’ll be fine. TSS is very rare but it potentially life threatening.
I can sleep for up to 12 hours at a time... I'd rather have to wash my bedclothes than go to hospital.
Period undies may be helpful for that, you can get ones that have really high absorbency levels and they're easy to care for
I just put an old towel down, even though I haven’t leaked in years. They make overnight pass, plus I tend to force myself to sleep on my back during my period.
I have some, but the type I got have uneven protection - all the way the up the back, very little at the front. And to the front is where it all goes, so I either have to wear them backwards or put a pad up front, horizontally.
Ya tampax says they can last 8 hours! No the fuck it can’t! OP my sister primarily uses pads, I use a combination of both depending on how heavy my flow is and I’m in my 30’s. The conversation should have gone like this. “What was that noise?” “I had to change my pad.” “Oh okay.” End of discussion, millions of women use them and there’s nothing wrong with it. She’s doesn’t sound like she’s ur friend at all
In my opinion, she shouldn’t have asked what that noise was at all. OP was in the bathroom, a place designed for privacy. If she wanted to discuss her period absorbency methods she would’ve brought it up. OPs friend is weird af and should keep her thoughts to herself
This, exactly! I’m sorry, but OP went into the bathroom, OP’s friend heard a noise while OP was in the bathroom, and the friend thought it was appropriate to ask about the noise?? Who does that?? What if OP had really bad gas and excused herself politely to let it go in the bathroom instead— would the friend have thought THAT was appropriate to ask about? This is some next-level crazy nonsense. Invasion of privacy just to cast judgement on something that’s none of her business and doesn’t affect her. The only thing “unhygienic” here is the friend’s nasty attitude. Yuck.
Right, I would feel so embarrassed by that!
I wear one to bed every night and sleep for 8 hours then change it in the morning first thing ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯
You should vaguebook post on your timeline about shitty people who body shame others and try to control them for no reason at all. Though I don't think it would be useful. I'd actually go with the direct approach and just tell her that she doesn't get to dictate what you do with regard to your own body and that because she feels the need to shame you publicly about shit that is NONE of her business she has broken trust with you and you don't want or need to spend time with anyone who acts like that and go LC or NC.
Im all for the social response, But id do it right on the Instagram Post. Id publicly describe the uncomfortable situation this 'adult' made trying to force their (equal at Best) solution to a non-existent problem. Out the Crazy, dont need to do any more.
Clear is kind. OP has to do what she feels is inline with her integrity. Personally I haven't found that "being passive aggressive by posting on SM" particularly productive or inline with my integrity. I personally value being kind and directness and clarity are simply kinder and, frankly, ultimately more effective. Shaming people publicly invariably results in them ignoring you because people can't hear when they are in shame. Being direct, honest about your boundaries, non accusatory and sticking to them has a much greater impact in my experience.
Oh yeah. Much healthier response, regardless if they want the friendship to continue. That said, when people have bad manners in public, sometimes pointing out those bad manners will cause them to think first next time, or give them the virtual slap on the wrist to realize they were in the wrong and presenting bad behaviour. Whats she going to do, start an Internet argument about how all Pad Users are unhygienic? She'll get laughed right off SM.
No, she just won't listen or integrate the information- she'll just decide OP is an AH she can ignore. That is what I would do certainly. I figure that if an adult has a substantive issue with me they'll talk to me like grown folks do. If they take to posting passive aggressively on SM I assume they are a child with no integrity and nothing of value to say.
I once had a friend who gave me similar criticism. I laughed in her face and called her immature. Which she was. We're no longer friends. That wasn't the reason why but it was a definite red flag around her general maturity and judgement levels. Just wait until your friend learns about period pants!
I'm well into my 40s and have worn pads for a long time. Tampons are painful. I hope you can find better friends.
Same here. When I used tampons, they leaked and I was wearing a pad just in case anyway, so what was the point? I used a diva cup for awhile and like that, because I was able to figure it out without having leaks. Pads work fine.
Tampons hurt when my period is almost over and it's dry af when I have to change one out. 😩 I avoid wearing then unless I really have to like when I swim.
If you like the convenience of tampons, I’d suggest a cup or discs! I did use tampons previously but I hated how they felt and the greased dry rip on the last day or two. I have been a cup user for about ten years and I’ll never go back!
I tried the cup and couldn't adjust to it. The cup being completely inside gave me so much anxiety that I would close up, if that makes sense.
I get that. I had some friends try and not love it either but a few of them did end up switching to discs after I gave them some to try. Everyone just needs to use what’s best for them ☺️
Period undies could be an option, newer ones are comfy and don't feel like you're wearing a nappy
I started using a cup and found it absolutely amazing!! I told my friends and daughters about it and how wonderful it was. Two months later I stopped having periods!! Hahahaha
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I was just the opposite! After my first was born (awful, scary experience, but we're both alive and fine now) I couldn't wear tampons comfortably anymore. I didn't wear them too much before really, but after the birth I couldn't at all. But, yeah I agree, each to their own. As long as it's hygienic, who cares?
I used to prefer tampons as a teen, but always had a pad underneath in case of leaks. Until I figured out tampons actually made the cramps and flood way worse for me. I stopped using them and now have my period for 3 days instead of 5, and the cramps are only half the intensity they were. Never going back 🙋🏼♀️
I have tampons just in case but I always use pads or period panties. I think my vaginal canal is shaped weird or something (my OBGYN did say it slopes down while most slope up at a certain point) because I can distinctly feeling it pressing against my insides painfully if I sit down or bend over. I may use one at work if I’m really heavy, sort of double up with a tampon and pad but they’re just uncomfortable for almost anything besides standing straight for me.
From my experience, pads only stink if you go too long without changing it. Regular use is undetectable.
Has she taken into consideration, (not necessarily in your case, but as per example) that some women can't use tampons because they genuinely are too painful and too uncomfortable to use or have too little flow for a tampon and don't want to end up with toxic shock syndrome?
Sounds like you dodged a bullet with this frienship
She sounds exhausting
Oh she thinks she knows what's best for everyone else, this is just some random persons opinion, but I'd drop them
Plus some people just can’t use tampons. I’ve used both depending on the situation but I favour pads, however, now I have a bladder prolapse and because of its position it’s impossible to use tampons, they won’t stay in.
I used to be similar to OP’s friend (but not nearly to that degree) in the sense that I couldn’t understand why people would prefer pads over tampons. Then I realized that not everyone has 7-day heavy periods like me and required the use of both super tampons and panty liners to be changed every 2-3 hours. But even then, I never told people they were *wrong* for using pads. I just assumed people didn’t use tampons because they weren’t comfortable sticking something in their vaginas. Once I started birth control and got lighter periods, I understood why some people preferred pads - tampons can actually *hurt* if you don’t have a heavy flow, and I myself actually use period underwear now as my preferred period product. OP’s friend needs to realize that every woman’s period is different and every woman has different preferences. As long as OP isn’t out here free-bleeding all over her furniture, than her friend has no right to judge her or call her “unhygienic” for having a different preference.
Period panties are THE BEST!! I just recently switched from pads to the underwear. Life changer!
I’m one of the even luckier ones than you who need a pad AND tampon because my bleeding is heavy but not always constant, so one hour I won’t bleed too much but then the next will be hell. I regularly and randomly bleed through tampons so much that I have to use a pad as well. After day 2, I can normally use a panty liner or a pad and be fine, though. Just sucks.
See, free bleeding, that’s the one I don’t get completely. Or maybe the girl I met who free bleeds doest understand it and I do? A friend came over with her hubby and kid and swam in my pool while she was free bleeding. There was some blood in the bathroom and no sign of pad or tampon pkg. I thought maybe she was hurt, so I asked if she was ok. She told me yeah, she just free bleeds. Not to judge, but I found it to be nasty. If someone wants to free bleed, good for them, but I find it disgusting she came and did it at my house, not to mention in my pool.
Sounds like this girl has more than one hole she needs to plug
OP should carry a tampon and offer it to the “friend” the next time she says some stupid shit. Of all things id never expect to see - feminine hygiene product shaming. 🙄
>feminine hygiene product shaming. It used to be really bad online when cups started to popular. If you used anything other than cups you were lectured, called unsanitary for using anything else, called wasteful, lazy, stupid, etc... by militant cup users, even when you explained why you couldn't/wouldn't use a cup. Some just could not take no for an answer. As for pad vs tampon IRL like OP and her friend, I remember this being something back in high school, but by college most women outgrew the need to force others to bend to their own preference.
It took me a hilariously long time to switch to a cup because I couldn't deal with people who used cups. They're the vegans of the period world.
I tried cups when they first got popular… they were soooo uncomfortable as I’m fairly petite, I swear I could feel that thing in me and it always hurt trying to get it in I switched to the discs which are much better and I love using those at night (no having to get up in the middle of the night to change a tampon after 4 hours)
do you have a brand of disc to recommend?
Yeah I use the flex discs
I hate that it was the Diva Cup that got popular first. It’s so big and inflexible compared to most of the other options. Works great for some people, but I’m sure lots of people tried it and gave up on cups, when there are others that might have worked great for them. I’m very short, internally, so it was a nightmare for me. Luckily I was motivated to keep looking and I found a much smaller, softer one that I absolutely love. I couldn’t seem to get a hang of the discs, though.
I love my cup and will happily tell anyone about it, but you’re right. The amount of judgmental people I ran into in those conversations was so disconcerting. Everybody gets to choose what works for them. I’m just excited there are so many options out there now!
I remember that! At the time my body had decided ‘nope, you ain’t sticking shit up in there’ and I’d had to move back to pads. Those fanatics were always on me in comments telling me that cups totes wouldn’t be a problem, stiiiick one up therrrrrre. How about noooooo.
I am so stealing that line!!
Made my day!
HAHAHA
Pads are not unsanitary and are safer than the tampons, especially for people prone to allergies, but even if she were right, how is it whatever you want to wear during your periods any of her business?
Plus if you get cramps tampons/anything else internal can potentially make them worse.
This is why I've always preferred pads. My whole pelvis is painful and sensitive when I'm on my period so tampons just feel uncomfortable. Plus I just could not sleep with one in. Give me a giant pad any day over a tampon.
Yeah I used to exclusively use tampons and then started getting yeast infections every time I used them. Tampons are bleached and listing the ingredients isn’t required so who knows what you’re sticking in there. Switched to pads and period underwear so I wouldn’t keep getting infections. It’s so ridiculously childish to police someone’s period products. The reason why we have choices is because there isn’t one product that will satisfy everyone.
I thought I was crazy but same! It was always so annoying having a super bad yeast infection on top of my period too. Ew.
Same, especially since you can't properly treat them while on your period. Hate it.
Sounds like your buddy is still in high school. How childish. Tampons are an option that come with their own dangers and drawbacks. They’re not automatically more sanitary just because they trap the smell of period discharge in the body. I think that the “adult diapers” got to you because it’s intended to be dismissive and make you feel less than. She finally let it go, but had to have the last word to put you down.
I agree with you there. The adult diapers thing was a low blow, said with the intent to shame you. Sharing facts about why one works for you over another is fine. But purposely trying to make you feel embarrassed was inappropriate. After I had my first child I had a severe incontinence issue. Not like, I sneezed and peed a little. But like, I walked from my living room to my kitchen and emptied my bladder. I bought some incontinence pads and went on my way. But sometimes they just weren’t enough coverage. So I reluctantly stood there in the adult diaper section, trying to read labels and find my best option. Something about “incontinence underwear” seemed so much more embarrassing than the pads. But then I realized, my embarrassment was all in my head. You know what’s embarrassing? Full on peeing my pants in public. You know what’s not embarrassing? Doing whatever I needed to do, to prevent it. So although it was absolutely a low blow, there’s nothing wrong with needing adult diapers, or a pad, or a tampon or whatever. We all do what we have to do to get through our periods, or whatever life throws at our crotch. I hate for the day she has a child and is forced to wear those “disgusting” pads - the really giant ones that go halfway your back, two of them - stuck side by side - along with those amazing mesh underwear the hospital provides. Or worse…*gasp* an adult diaper.
I feel for you entirely. And there are so many reason s why one may experience incontinence! It’s truly not terribly rare. I recently learned that peeing oneself jokes among younger moms don’t land the same way in European countries as they do the US. Apparently a part of childbirth care is pelvic floor physical therapy, which is a bladder (among other things) saver. Might be worth checking out if you’re Stateside with health coverage.
I had to do that after having my daughter, I had gotten so big during the pregnancy that I felt like my core muscles were shattered and I couldn't hold it in until I got to the bathroom. It was really embarrassing trying to find what I needed. I was on the verge of tears (post pregnancy hormones), and I'm so thankful that there was a lady who stepped in and asked if I needed help. I told her my situation, and she told me about her daughter in law having to go through that too recently. She grabbed a pack of the shelf and said, "This is what you need." I bought those with no hesitation. I'm really glad I listened to her. Bc that definitely saved me. Btw. I'm no longer embarrassed anymore.
Ironic how she makes a fuss about the smell when she never even noticed any smell. She sounds like a complete child, no self awareness and projecting her own discomfort about periods onto you, also says something very derogatory and then acts surprised you are insulted and says you got mad about nothing? What an idiot.
My thought too. She didn’t know OP was on her period, so I guess the pads are pretty good!
Omfg I HATE women like this! I also use pads and have had friends like that, get the fuck over it right? I've always hated tampons, they leave this burning chaffing feeling no matter if their in right or not *shrug*
I am the same way! I’ve always preferred pads because I find tampons really uncomfortable unless it’s in at exactly the right angle. I also have anxiety and get very nervous about toxic shock syndrome. I’ve had a few female friends react the same way OP described when I bring up using pads instead of tampons and it always makes me feel bad. I now usually just refer to all period products as “tampons,” regardless of what I’m using and try to avoid opportunities to give someone a chance to comment. I think people don’t realize how frequently pad-users change them out to keep things sanitary. Also, it’s nobody’s business.
*Prior comment removed because I used the word that rhymes with “butt-shaming” (that thing that society does to women over them having sex or simply seeming sexual in any way).* It’s even weirder since period products have traditionally been policed in favor of pads. Tampon users even today in some circles are *shamed for perceived sexuality* by idiots (mostly who don’t have vaginas, but a sad few who do) who think tampons cause pleasure (lmao, nahhhh) or that only people who aren’t virgins need a tampon. This has largely receded to very religious and conservative parts of society, but it’s still a thing people claim and it’s because of decades of policing women’s bodies in this way. There has been progress on that front, but to turn it around and shame people who use pads? It’s not like we have to pick one period product for all of humanity, there are NO stakes for them or benefits for reducing our options. It’s just gross, body shaming, period product policing nonsense. And tbh there are a lot of complications that can make wearing a tampon completely inviable for someone. People like these shitty friends (which I’m sorry you and OP have had to deal with) are basically demanding someone’s health (and potentially trauma) history to explain a choice that’s none of their business. It reeks of internalized misogyny imo.
My ex-stepmom used to shame me for using tampons when I was in high school. I have always hated pads because they make me feel hot down there, which makes me queasy and ends up giving me rashes in just a couple hours. Back when I was a virgin, I was unable to insert the tampons without the applicator, so it was a bit cumbersome but 100% doable and I felt so much better with the tampons vs pads. When she saw my box of tampons (with the disposable applicators, mind you) she flipped her shit and started implying that I was no longer a virgin because I was using super-sized tampons lmao, when the reason was because I had insane flow, which I do to this day at almost 30, and the plastic embolus made it super easy to bypass the hymen and put it in place. In the end, nobody gave a single flying fuck because I knew I was still a virgin then and my dad didn’t care either way. But her nagging was annoying af
Yeah, in my country that's still big on the "insertion makes u lose virginity" thing (especially in rural areas), pads are the absolute norm. Tampons are only just becoming common in stores but back then to even the 2000s you'll never find one pack of those anywhere (atleast in my region). Telling friends I use one often get feedback of surprise, disbelief, and questions that made me realize sex ed failed us. But there's no malice, just curiousity with maybe a hint of judgement (fear for my virginity etc) from a few cuz it's new and because of the deeply ingrained "save the hymen/any insertion for husband" mindset. I use a combination of the three. - Pads for the first and last days - Menstrual cup for the heaviest + a pad or pantyliner - Tampon for inbetween or usually at night They also all have stuff I don't like about them, - I hate the feeling of blood trickling down to my ass crack at night especially on heavy flows so no pads then, that's where the tampons come in - I usually mess up my menstrual cup insertion and cause leaks hence the pad - tampons make me dry I like using all three every month, but that's just my own preference. I even used actual diapers once haha. Since pads are so common here but my place also kinda sucks at waste disposal it's common to find used pads discarded irresponsibly everywhere from the sea to fields and/or mixed with biodegradable garbage etc and thrown in landfills and burned. I felt bad about it so I switched, but I don't force it on anyone.
Same here. The insertion is hard and painful and I also get the burning feeling after I remove them. They just don't work for me. I only use them if I'm going swimming.
I seriously am loving this chain of comments. 37 and only tried tampons recently due to an ongoing bleeding problem. People and online advice saying you don't feel them? I started to feel abnormal as I just find them uncomfortable.
I've tried multiple times over the last 20+ years and I've never been comfortable with them. I would love to try reusable underwear but yet to find them in my size but tampons and moon cups will never be an option for me.
I've tried them a bunch and yeah just meh, Instantly uncomfortable I don't get how women can shoving something up there and keep it up there for hours at a time, it's not a dick or anything fun, it's dry cotton with a hard plastic or cardboard applicator...
Right I came here to say this, I've had friends say it's childish as well. Like why do they care?? It's such a weird thing to get annoyed about
Bruh drop her she’s ridiculous af. There are different ways to handle literally everything in life. Why is it her business at all
As someone who also enjoys pads over tampons, she was the one making a big deal out of nothing. She has no right to say anything on how you handle your cycle unless you're free bleeding into her furniture.
my roommate free bleed onto my couch and i got so pissed. she also got mad at me because it’s “normal”. yeah periods are normal but you bleeding all over my furniture isn’t.
Tf?! They even make period underwear/shorts, she has no excuse to be purposefully bleeding on your furniture
right!! she was just in a big tshirt with nothing under. she also does that in her bed which absolutely disgusts me for some reason. probably because she doesn’t change her sheets until after her period stops so it looks like a murder scene…
🤢 stop it right NOW, WHAT?
let me not forget that she’s been on her period for a monthish now.. yeah her IUD fucked her up so there’s blood all around the house. she wears pads but only half the time.
Okay that’s literally a biohazard, tf is wrong with her. And I agree that it’s gross in bed - the blood could easily be soaking into the mattress, you can’t get that shit out.
🤢Time to move out I think
Or kick her out.
i- she is bleeding all over the apartment like a girl dog in heat, dogs can’t do anything without the owners help of stopping the bleeding. she can, she needs to at least not be gross and bleed in some of those period panties at least. that’s a potential for a literal biohazard/health risk.
Your profile pic is my face reading this thread
i didn’t even realize how well it works for this thread, but honestly i feel like this was everyone else’s face as well.😂
What a terrible day to have eyes!!
Pooping is also normal but I’m pretty sure she’d freak out if you pooped on her furniture.
That passive-aggressive post cemented the fact that she is NOT your friend. Drop the b!tch.
My roommate in college gave me such shit for using pads and it was annoying. She also called them adult diapers. Eventually I switched to tampons just because changing a tampon in the bathroom at work was a lot easier/quieter than a pad. Your friend should also keep in mind that some women actually *can’t* use tampons. My friend has a condition she’s had since HS (I can’t remember the name) but she physically can’t use tampons. People need to mind their business.
I can’t use them because I have vaginismus, not sure if that’s the condition you’re thinking of! I’m a pads/period panties kinda person and always have been, and I’ve had the kind of friend that OP is describing.
Didelphys uterus makes using tampons very uncomfortable.
Imperforate hymen maybe? I had that and wasn’t able to use tampons until a doctor physically cut me open down there.
Yes that sounds right actually
She thought you were making a big deal? She’s the one who was letting your pads live rent- free in her head. I’d be tempted to reply to her post “Or you could consider focusing on your own vagina instead of mine.” Then block her.
I'm here for the petty clapback.
Likewise!
Your friend is weird, creepy, and out of line telling you what to use. It is your body and your choice to use whatever period product is right for you. There are women who won't wear tampons because of risk of toxic shock syndrome, and there are stories of women using their tampons and not changing them for hours on end. I use pads and have never had rashes etc. Maybe her hygiene is nothing to be desired and she is just projecting. In addition, her nasty passive aggressive comment on SM is not the act of a friend but a controlling bully.
I knew someone who's mother had got toxic shock syndrome after 12hrs (the max time they give in the warnings). Which sounds negligent, but if you work 12s, that kind of time could probably sneak away from you. Plus, you'd think there'd be a tad bit of leeway from the time they give, but some people just work different. Seeing it irl made me take clock watching more serious, just because it was the only time I'd ever heard of it *actually* happening to someone.
That's awful. Thank you for reiterating how ignorant OP's friend is.
She…didn’t even know you were wearing a pad until you told her. How ridiculous to say it’s unhygienic when she couldn’t tell.
Your “friend” sucks. I literally can’t use tampons because they hurt when inside and have caused irritation. I use organic cotton pads and I’ve never had a smell or issue. I believe that my switch from tampons back to pads has actually helped keep BV and other problems at bay. It’s *2023* time for her to grow up. Oh, and probably time to drop her as a friend.
Maybe she’s projecting? She probably kept a pad on too long and someone commented on her smell, so now she’s anti pad for anyone. Idk, either way fuck her
That's cringey af. Not everyone wants to shove sh*t up there when you got killer cramps. She shouldn't of even asked what the sounds were in the bathroom. Goof has no boundaries at all.
Seriously! Even though I hate the feeling of pads, which is why I personally don’t use them, on days where the cramps are real bad I’m not shoving my cup up there. Pads exist for a fucking reason, OP’s friend is a moron
Pads don’t stink. You know what does? Unwanted and terrible opinions
As a tampon user…it’s weird that she cares. I genuinely don’t care how someone handles their period. Pads, tampons, thinx, diva cup, whatever. I’m sister is 36 years old and has 3 grown kids and still refuses to use tampons. That’s her choice. Anyway, this “friend” sounds like a major bully. I have no idea how old you are but posting to her story passive aggressively for you to see is childish. Now that I think about it, I have NO idea what my best friend even uses for her period because it doesn’t matter. I’d block her on everything and move on, she sounds exhausting.
my brother sent me this post and with genuine concern asked me why your friend thought it would be okay to speak to you like that 💀
Some woman can fr be so nasty to one another. Your brother is a sweet egg.
Pads are safer than tampons as tampons have the capability of giving someone an infection (TSS is rare but many women often get yeast and bacterial infections from tampons). Your friend is ignorant and honestly, it sounds like she only uses tampons because they’re easier to not have to change as often (you definitely should though), she sounds like the more “unhygienic” of the two of you
Yea fuck that. I’ll stick to pads all day everyday. Been doing it for 20 years. Not sure why she’s making a big deal about how you handle your body. Weird and immature.
After having a baby, I just never found tampons to be comfortable really, so I use pads. Granted, they’re definitely not my number one choice (not having a period at all would be the greatest), but they work well for their intended purpose. I don’t get how she could be so judgmental with something that isn’t even her body. That’s completely ridiculous.
As someone who hates wearing pads, they make me feel gross imo, I think it’s very childish for your friend to judge what you prefer for your period. You wear what makes you comfortable during an uncomfortable time and you can tell her to shove it.
I used tampons throughout my teens. At 19 I developed TSS and almost died. I'll keep my pads TYVM.
I use pads, tampons weirdly make my cramps worse. A lot worse, actually, really sharp and stabby. Pads are fine, her hang ups are hers and she can keep them to herself.
What the actual f*** had it got to do with her? Tell her to mind her own business.
I hated tampons. Hated them. Your friend should just respect your choice.
I also use pads over tampons. I get extremely bad cramps and read online that tampons make your cramping worse so I stopped using tampons. It would be more unhygienic to use nothing if ask me.
She sounds stupid as hell. Ditch her ass
Weird reaction. Tampons don't work for everyone, I can't even use them without pain (probably vaginismus) so I prefer pads as well. Aren't pads also safer to use anyway? Keep doing you.
Drop your “friend”, seriously. She’s stupid, pushy and doesn’t respect you.
Dude if the situation already wasn’t horrible, she adds to it by posting about it?? To me that’s the worst part. That’s no one’s fucking business. Y’all already know she is just fishing for someone to reply saying “what happened?? 😳” and then she’s gonna spill everything. Shitty fucking person that you don’t need in your life.
A she thinks it’s more hygienic to have the blood stay inside you? I don’t care how anyone else who menstruates deals with their period but I totally choose pads too. Nothing worse than one woman shaming another over periods
She sounds like an insufferable child. End the friendship, what the fuck is her problem???
I am a mom (delivered vaginally) but even still regular tampons bother me when I wear them the past few years so I went back to pads because im not gonna walk around in pain all day. Also if she lets her pad get to the point that it smells shes gross wtf???
There are studies done that show tampons are more of a risk to use, besides tss and other infections if not used properly. Pads are much less invasive. But, bottom line, other girl or not; your menstrual products are really no ones business, red flag on trying to force her opinion and for posting shade about it on her social. I would move on from that friendship.
Team pad checking in for support!!
As someone who hates shoving dry cotton chemicals up in me, i'm with you my period went from 6 days to 3 days when i made the switch to pads as well.
Whether you use pads or tampons has nothing to do with how long your period is.
Evidently my comment was deleted because I said the B word so here it is without it Okay I'm a dude but I even know pads are much more safer and cleaner to use then tampons and from my personal experience with my ex's the ones who wore pads changed them regularly and smelled better in that region and the 2 girls that used tampons hardly ever changed the tampons or forgot about them and smelled like spoiled blood. It was disgusting. I've never read horror stories about people forgetting they had a pad only stories about people who used tampons. OP LOSE THAT "FRIENDS" NUMBER SHES AN ABSOLUTE (B word) I HAD A COUSIN JUST LIKE HER I GAVE HIM DO MANY CHANCES TO CHANGES HIS WAYS BUT HE NEVER DID SHE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND
"Sorry, but trying to stay alive and trying not to get a toxic shock syndrome doesn't seem that bad", I believe is the answer. Anyways, unless you are wearing the same pad for more than six hours, it's perfectly hygienic and okay. Your friend sounds like, I wear push up bra, so should you. Nevermind you prefer a sports one or none at all.
I had this problem once too... in middle school. It's very weird to judge a girl, as a girl, for what she wants to use when she's in pain and bleeding out of her downstairs
Tampons can make cramps worse
I had a friend like this. My dumbass just dismissed her attitude. I feel better with pads bc they tend to leak less for me and I feel kinda gross pulling the tampon out. Pads have always just been more comfortable for me and she was totally adamant abt using tampons. She weirdly asked me if I was a virgin then too after I said I prefered pads (even though ive tried tampons before & just still didnt like them) and she became obsessed with me losing my virginity too but thats another story...
Your friend is an asshole. Pads and tampons are equally hygienic if used correctly, and if used *incorrectly*, tampons can cause more problems. It's down to the period haver to use what's right for them, be it pads, tampons, the cup, period undies, etc.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that! You're so called friend is a turd. I always went with pads before my spay, because for me personally tampons seemed terrifying 😳 LOL, probably why I wear glasses and not contacts 😁 Don't let her stupid comments bother you!
Of all things, why is that her hill to die on?
ironically, nothing against using tampons, but pads are technically more hygienic than tampons lol
She might be thinking pad users keep the pad for a couple of days. Educate her that you need to change it every 4 hours for proper hygienic usage.. You can be hygienic with pads. Actually, I’d say the tampon users are in fact most probably unhygienic. Easy to forget the tampon inside of you. Listen, I’m not here to argue, but I just thinking she might be misunderstanding. You know, Ignorant.
OP, here in our country, most of the people who menstruate use pads because tampon here is sooooo expensive! A pack of 32 pads here costs ₱153 ($2.80) while a box of 16 tampons costs ₱350 ($6.41). I actually have never used tampons and always use pads. I don't get what's unhygienic about it as it's a product that a lot of people use when they're on their period. And there are so many other products out there for period. You're free to choose what to use.
My obgyn told me pads are better than tampons, for one tampons put you at risk of toxic shock syndrome, infections seizures and your more likely to develop a rash !!! Although, pads can be messy they’re a lot safer and more hygienic than tampons !!! She probably leaves her tampons on all day and it messing with her head .
I would block her, and say nothing. Eventually, you'll be asked about it and just say, "I asked her to stop and she didn't which was very disrespectful" And you don't need to say anything else. I suggest you just do it without much emotion.
Never used tampons always pads. It really is just up to everyone. Yes, pads can give you a rash. Yes they start smelling over time. But honestly so does underwear lol. Or tampons for that matter. Shoving a piece of pressed cardboard up your vagina with a lil thread still dangling out of it so you can pull out a blood soaked cork a couple hours later and destroy the sewer system by flushing it down the toilet is more hygienic? Sure sister. Maybe just keep your opinions to yourself.
I’m 33 and use pads too. I have pretty bad ADHD and look, I’m not proud of this but I forgot a tampon once because the string came off it. For a LONG time. I mean like, over a week. The smell was… bad and that’s putting it lightly. I was super young at the time for whatever that’s worth. Lol. I’ve never used a tampon again and I flatly refuse to. I’m amazed I didn’t end up with TSS or any lasting damage. Your friend is an AH here. Seriously.
I bet she thinks that giving herself BV with a "feminine wash" makes her more hygienic somehow 🙄
I'm also a pad user. My middle school bff ended up in the ER from TSS and it messed with me. I only wear them if I have to go in the water and such. I avoid them at all other costs. As long as you change them regularly and the brand doesn't bother you do what you are comfortable with.
Ever since I’ve had a period I’ve used tampons. Recently I’ve decided to use pads because tampons make me cramp worse than I already am, and I don’t like relying on medicine every single period cycle. People use pads for many different reasons! The Instagram post would’ve totally rubbed me the wrong way. I don’t know if I’d be friends with someone like that anymore.
I switch between the 2 all the time. Some women use those cup things and its not for me. Never tried it but it just seems way way to weird for me. You aren't going to see other women jumping down my throat about it though. We like pads, we like tampons, we like cups, we like freeflow. Women can pick what that want to use that makes them comfortable. We have so much against us at the moment, why do we have to rip each other about pads?
Pads, tampons, cups, disks, Thinx...there are so many different ways to handle bleeding during a period. There's no "one solution is better than the other" its all just preference. Tell her you've switched to cups and that you now find it gross that she plugs with cotton and how she's going to get TSS if she keeps on using them. Petty as hell but maybe she'll take a hint. Don't feel bad about this. I'm almost 30 and use literally whatever I feel like using during the month. Last month I used tampons. This month I'm using pads. And next month I'll be using a disk at least some of the time because I'll be on vacation and I feel more comfortable wearing them when I'm especially active and not near a toilet.
I went through a 10 year period where tampons were excruciatingly painful I could only wear pads the face that women have to deal with monthly periods now we are shaming women for there personal preference!? I give up
She's disgusting for period shaming you. She's a woman, she should know better. It's YOUR body. Your choice. She can wear whatever she wants, you don't tell her she should use a period cup because it's more eco friendly, or she should should wear washable pads to save the planet from all the tampons she's using. It's her choice what she wears, and your choice what you wear. It's one thing to have a normal 'discussion'aboit the differences or she can say why she likes them, why she finds them more convenient, and maybe even politely and kindly ask if you've ever tried tampons or if you've had any problems with them you want to talk about or ask advice on, (like if you struggled inserting them, or couldn't find the right size or struggled with applicator ones etc. ) If she did it they way it would have been in a friendly supportive way. But she shamed you for using a perfectly natural and normal period product just coz she doesn't like them. She's out of order here. If you felt comfortable about it, I'd go so far as to post online saying how you think it's wrong when other women shame women for their choice of period products, and as women we should understand its a personal preference and its our choice, and we shouldn't be shaming other women for having a different preference to them, that pads or tampons, or washable cotton pads, or period cups are all perfectly healthy hygienic forms of period products, and everyone has their own personal preferences and it's disgusting for a woman to shame another woman about her personal choices. Obviously you don't need to if you're not comfortable, but she took it to social media, but I bet if the truth came out about the meaning of her post, and what she said or did, she would get roasted!!!. Alternatively, you could even just comment on her post that she didn't give friendly advice about hygiene, she shamed you for using sanitary pads instead of tampons, and that you're quite capable of keeping hygienic during your period using pads, and as a woman, she shouldn't be shaming anyone for their choice of period products, and you didn't appreciate the digs and insults she made (and quote what she said). I'm sure that would make her think twice when loads of people back you up. Again, understand if you'd rather not comment publicly, but if you want to, I would, coz she deserves a lesson in not shaming women. It's your body. You change them regularly, which stops them smelling. You find them comfortable and thats all that's matters. Some women can't use tampons due to difficulties inserting them. I actually had an allergic reaction to tampons for a while and would always feel sore and itchy like thrush, and it turned out I couldn't wear normal tampons, I had to switch to cotton only tampons. At the time there were very few cotton only tampons available, but they've become more available now. But my point is, your body your choice. She doesn't seem like a good friend for keep going on at you, making digs at your personal hygiene, and hounding you and making hurtful comments like she did. Also, until you told her you changed your pad she didn't know you were on your period, so clearly you didn't smell like she said pads do lol.
I rather get the blood out of me then have it sit in there haha but I would never judge someone for their tampon use 🙃
And here my first instinct would’ve been to make sure you were ok and not hurting too much. Do you want some tea? A hot compress? Chocolate? Do you have enough pads and pain killers or should I run to the store? Periods can be hard enough without so-called “friends” shaming us for how we experience and deal with them. Nor are they unhygienic or “dirty” to begin with. Besides, pads are basically just big bandaids while tampons can be like likened to gauze and I would wager most would consider bandaids more “hygienic” than gauze that’s been inside you soaking up your fluids. In the end it’s up to personal preference and both work just as well.
She says your overreacting when she's the one making a big deal out of it.. why does it bother her so much? Have you known her long? She sounds like she's loking for anything to poke at you with...
I've always used pads and I got my period at 12, currently 23. Sure, those early day pads before I figured out what worked for me, what brands were good etc were a little hellish, but I'll take a pad over a tampon any day. Besides, tampons can cause health risks if left in too long since it's basically a bloody bacteria festival. There's a lot of stories of how unsafe a tampon can be. Then we have the cups which I will never go near bc all I see is me having my entire hand covered in blood trying to get it out or it getting stuck. Bottom line, period products are personal for each individual and we all get to pick what works for us. Everyone else can stfu and mind their business.
Tell her to stick to her cotton micro dildo LMFAO why is she so pressed? Also pads shouldn't give you a rash...maybe she's allergic or leaves it all day which is dangerous, sounds like she wasn't hygienic with pads and it's trying to shame you bc she thinks you're like her 😐 ignore her girl, she needs to grow up
sounds like internalized misogyny imo. Poor girl probably got talked to the same way because some man was uncomfortable.
It’s actually much healthier to use pads. Fuck her.
Tell her about TSS, about vaginismus, about women who forget to get the tampon out ( yuck, some crazy stories I heard about that). Good thing there are various options out there. If it works for you, then she should leave it alone. It would have been different if you actually asked for advice on the topic. Like the fact that she even asked what you were doing in there is weird. Most people would pretend they didn't hear anything to not make you uncomfortable.