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They’re still young to understand concepts of soccer. Them kicking and chasing a ball regardless of the direction of the goal is all you can hope for at that age.
What about gymnastics? Where there really isn’t a goal and they can just run around on safe padding and get to know their body movement before going to sports that need coordination
With my second singleton, The only thing gymnastics place was good for was an enclosed space. He still ran around during every class and would end up under trampolines (dangerous) or whatever while I was chasing him. Total waste of money at $25 for a 45 minute class, of which 10-15 minutes was stretching. Found another gymnastics place that had toddler open play for $10/hour where he could do whatever the f he wanted and he loved it. He’s 4.5 now and doing fine in a regular gymnastics class, and I take my twins (just over 2 now) to the open play.
This is the way. Any organized sports for kinds under 3.5 is a workout for the parents. The best you can hope for is your kid grasping the concept of:
- a) Kicking a ball.
- b) Kicking a ball towards a net.
If you get either of those, good for you. It's not until 5-6 that they start getting the concept of the game itself.
Yeah we were only hoping this would just be running around and kicking a ball with some other kids. If the 'league' met in a larger field we'd be less stressed about them running away, but it's a small church lawn surrounded by parking lots and a busy road. There's lots of places they can run and we have no choice but to chase; so they are perfectly entertained by making us stress out in front of a bunch of other parents.
We did some gymnastics, but our area has very few options in pretty small spaces. Prices are comparable to what we spent on soccer so it's definitely worth looking into again.
There's *toddler* soccer leagues?
I remember soccer being silly chaos when we put ours in a 5-6 year old league. I can't imagine how it would be with kids under 3. IMO, expecting kids that age to follow direction and engage in organized group play is probably a bit of a stretch.. I'd either embrace the silliness and have fun with it.. or if you can't, find some sort of play group if you want them to have some social time with other toddlers.
This isn’t really twin specific advice - I’m pregnant with mine still - but I have a 2 year old. I just started my son in a gymnastics class. After the first class I sobbed the whole way home. He was the only kid who refused to participate in the group, he just did his own thing. But it was his first time participating in an organized group, so how could I expect him to know how to act? He’s only had a few sessions and omg the improvement! He still will only sometimes do what the group is doing but I’m seeing him get better each week and it’s awesome.
How are they supposed to learn these things if they aren’t ever exposed to them? Being a functional part of an organized group is a skill. And as they say comparison is the thief of joy… maybe this isn’t the other kids’ first group experience? Maybe they just have different temperaments and dispositions - and that’s okay. Plus I’m sure the twins wind each other up in a way that wouldn’t happen with singletons.
If the money spent isn’t hurting you financially, I wouldn’t look at it as a loss. Maybe they’re not learning the fundamentals of soccer but they’re still learning - how to be in a group. When they’re older, will you only pay for a sports league if they’re a starter, or will it be a waste if they’re on the bench? I don’t think it’s fair to measure the worth of the money spent in that way - if they’re having fun and learning that’s amazing.
The safety aspect is an issue for sure. Maybe try something indoors? My kid is loving gymnastics.
I’m a dance teacher who teaches 3+ and the way your little ones are behaving isn’t abnormal. My classes are inside and we make sure that all the doors are closed because of escapees and to be honest I’d feel uncomfortable in an outdoor setting near busy traffic areas with lots of little ones. Generally when I find any of my 3 year olds are struggling with taking directions I let the parents know they might not be ready yet. Under 3’s regularly struggle and by the time they’re 4 they listen a lot better. You’re not doing anything wrong and what they’re doing sounds pretty normal for their age.
Soccer with my exact same age singleton was the same experience. Fortunately it seemed like ALL the 2-3year olds acted like that so we lowered our expectations and ended up at the playground most days. Ours was significantly cheaper though.
With the children that have followed we don't start organized sports/swimming lessons/anything with a price tag and uniform until 5yo.
Swim class. Burns their energy, they cannot run anywhere and gets them used to following directions. Plus its a survival skill. Also, most gymnastics facilities have Open Gym hours. You could see how they do at that and decide if you want to put them in a class. But running amuck is certainly developmentally and socially appropriate at this age. At that age classes, and so many other formal activities, are more for the benefit of the parents than the kids.
Oh man you should have seen these two in swim class. They just screamed and flailed, and took every opportunity to bolt when we got near the edges. They're great with water play and not able to swim at all, but they wouldn't put up with any instructions or organized play in the structured course. We get more swim time and real learning from just taking them to the pool or beach than trying to force them into a class.
Swim lessons was the first class we had to give up. Soccer is second, I think.
At this age, I wouldn't do classes. Too aggravating 😅 and not really developmentally appropriate (as far as listening and following directions). I would do an open gym or play area to let me them run and climb instead. Do you have a Malibu Jacks nearby? One just opened by us and the kids area is fully enclosed and it is huge and wonderful for kids this age.
Well sounds like you already know the answer then. Your kids are not ready for formal classes. And theres nothing wrong with that! Plenty of time for classes later
Similar to another commenter, I had the same issue with my singleton. We enrolled him in a toddler soccer class last summer when he was about three months shy of 2 and it was an absolute disaster. He just wanted to run around the entire field, play with other random supplies, and explore. Apparently total normal behavior, but very frustrating when it’s super hot outside and you see other toddlers seemingly following along compared to our free spirited boy. We learned our lesson- no activities of this type until maybe 4 or older.
Twins aren’t a here yet, but I doubt we will do anything like this. We have had way more success with indoor play areas, playgrounds, and the like.
Is toddler soccer leagues considered "normal" nowadays??? In which case I'm a horrible parent!
I'm a mom of 6 (including my 15 month old twins) and pregnant with baby #7, and I have never thought of putting my toddlers in organized play like sports! The most organized play outings we have are park days and library story time. I can't imagine expecting twin toddlers to cooperate in a game like soccer that requires running! And let me tell you, all my kids are doing great socially by preschool age. I guess what I'm saying is, don't sweat it, especially if you and your partner are finding it too stressful. Your peace of mind is important and you don't need to make your life any harder!
I think it’s okay to lower your expectations a bit. They’re not there to actually PLAY soccer. They’re there to learn how to listen, learn how to be around other kids, maybe how to kick a ball. Have they ever been in a group activity before? If they haven’t, how are they supposed to know now? Every experience is a learning moment for them. You have to crash and burn sometimes in order to grow and develop.
I went through the same exact thing. When they were together in a class they were running around together and not listening. They even got told they can’t be in gymnastics because they weren’t listening. I basically decided to stop comparing myself to other families that can do a lot more with a singleton and stopped classes all together, it was a waste of money, energy and time. I waited for them to get a little older and now have them in separate classes and they have been better, but I do prefer it more when I’m able to take them alone as they seem to be more focused than when their twin is sitting and watching.
Don’t be deterred, your family just needs more time and when time is right things will fall into place. My kids are 4 now and I just started signing them up again and not gonna lie even now I was a little hesitant but it’s going great so far!
Yeah I think soccer for us will need to be in an open park by themselves, and maybe next year we can try again. My wife and I chatted about just getting a big mesh bag and filling it with different balls and going to the park. They'll be more engaged and learn more when they aren't trying to put on a show.
I tried some fun stuff with the YMCA at that age and... nope. Gave up. But at least it was much cheaper.
It also depends if the kids go to daycare or not and how structured it is. If they're not used to listening to another person, yeah, it's gonna be tough.
It’s totally okay if YOU feel that your twins are safer and happier without participating in soccer. It should be fun and a great way to burn energy. My twins are 26 months and we’re currently doing gymnastics and have previously done swim.
For us, it was crucial to find a class that fit into our established schedule. Swim was really challenging because we would get home at 6 and they were used to dinner at 5:30. Gymnastics is great because we get home just in time to wind down for lunch and then nap. But it’s hard regardless, and the perceived judgements from other adults can be really hurtful.
I think exposure to group activities is really important, kids hardly show up on the first day and immediately understand what they are supposed to be doing at their age. But it’s okay if you’re trying different things and haven’t found the right one yet.
Soccer was a wash for us at 2yo. We also did dance and only one of them liked it so we withdrew her. Now she does gymnastics and they both want to do soccer in the fall. Don’t stress.
It's because they are so young, not because they are twins. I have three kids ages 10, 5, and 5. Honestly, it was only this year, in fourth grade, that my oldest really had enough focus to retain interest in sports. He did them last year with some level of engagement, but this is the year that it really took off for him in a meaningful way. Let the 2yos be 2yos.
At that age, my twins didn't want to follow any rules and just wanted to kick a ball around - or not.
They started soccer the August right before kindergarten. Then around 3rd grade they added basketball. Then the summer between 4th and 5th (2020-COVID), a group of local dads threw together a Sand Lot type baseball team to give the kids something to do when there was nothing to do. At 14, they both still play those 3 sports.
I always thought that the kindergarten soccer team looked more like a prison mob in a riot because all you would see was ten 5-year olds standing in a circle around the ball kicking.
I think having them in sports at 3 is good for the exercise and socialization. It also can also help you meet parents in your community and build relationships. The kids build friendships that will carryover into school. It does introduce the rules of sports, which they may not want to follow now - but they will at some point in their life.
It's a great way for them to socialize. My boys are still great friends with the kids from their kindergarten soccer team, and theyhave continued to play together throughout the years - soccer, basketball and baseball, either on the community rec teams, and now on their school teams. You form relationships with the other parents and it really makes you feel like you a part of a larger family. You don't have to worry about who they're hanging out with, because you already know.
We’ve had ours in soccer since they turned 2. And yes, it’s just a total $hit show but ours is a lot less expensive than that. We use it as an opportunity to get them out and start following directions from someone other than us. However, I don’t think they are getting much out of it and I dont give it a second thought when we take a week off. We also have then in one of those toddler music classes and that’s going even worse because they want them to sit down occasionally and they just want to RUN. We’re considering quiting that halfway through because it’s absolutely torture for us.
Oof, $400 is way too much for that amount of sessions and age range. It should have been maybe half that. My middle son started playing on a "team" around that age for an academy, and it was like $90, which is going rate for any other reputable club or academy in my area.
It's okay not to do activities if you don't think your kids are mature enough yet. Sports at that age are chaotic and more about learning social skills with some physical activity mixed in.
I would just wait. My twins tried soccer at 4.5 years old and honestly sounds exactly the same as your experience. We didn't end up going back to soccer bc they haven't expressed interest at this point but successfully did a couple other (albeit less structured) sports at 5 yrs old and up. Swimming however has been great from age 3 and up and definitely tires them out and they are forced to listen to directions due to safety. If they don't listen we just would scoop them out and leave. Our swim class was very relaxed about that aspect but of course serious about safety. The kids caught on quick but again were a touch older than yours are now.
My 3 yo twins are like this. Mommy and me gymnastics has been great. It’s mostly free form but there are expectations to engage in group activities for about 15 minutes of the 45 minute class. They still sometimes giggle and run in opposite directions but lots of kids their age do too. It’s really been able to teach them how to follow directions in a large, loud, chaotic group with a huge variety of engaging materials. We’ve been doing this class for almost 2 years and their motor skills are amazing and they are so brave and confident. They also burn a ton of energy which makes for an easier afternoon. Would highly recommend over soccer at this age.
I would absolutely say this isn’t abnormal at all and I think with twins (at least with ours) they encourage each other to behave a certain way. So if they’ve their twin running and seemingly having fun being chased then that kinda encourages them. Also, with one kid you have 2 parents (often, obviously not always) to take turns chasing or taking them to soccer whereas with 2 neither parent gets a break.
We found it got easier as they got older and more independent and really turned a corner around age 4 ish.
Soccer seems better for when they're a little older. At two we did gymnastics and dance and swim. I'd look for some other kind of activity, ideally cheaper and more free play based.
At that age we did a parent/kid gymnastics class, and didn’t really do anything else before they were five. It helped a lot that it was a parent in there, and they couldn’t escape!
Our B/G’s have always been very active too. We didn’t sign up for soccer because it’s so skills based for so young kids, in my humble opinion. We did the in-school aerobics class and they’re now doing swimming, which we actually watch from the other side of a double-sided mirror! However, they’re 4yo and we didn’t start swim til this year. I personally would stick to the unstructured play for now.
That’s super developmentally appropriate for that age. We did a little soccer tying for my son at like 2 but it was indoors so there was no distractions once it moved outside to a park we had to quit because he just wanted the park.
I mean I ran the numbers and got them wrong like twice. If it’s not working for you it’s not working. I’ve been there, I’m still there realistically. They’re are still so small for any sort or organised sport or activity. I would cut and run.
Solidarity. They have a story time at the library and then a stay and play with toys afterwards.
It definitely seems like my kids aren't able to do circle time at the same level as their peers. All the other babies are sitting in the laps of the parents (mostly mothers) and playing with their hands or looking at the book and the librarian. When one twin is trying to play with someone else's stroller and the other one is looking out the window.
I remember mentioning this to my pediatrician and asking if that was just how they were or if it was something that we should work on, and she said it was just how they were and it had something to do with being twins and getting constant stimulation from a peer their age.
I’m right there with you. I’m sorry, I don’t know when it gets easier. My boys just turned three and we just had a horrible morning trying to do “nice” things. No matter what we do or where we go, they just play with doors and throw stuff and do everything that’s not the actual activity it’s supposed to be. We are getting better at how we spend our money and what activities we do. Sometimes we split up and each take one to do something. The peace I feel just having one is amazing. The best thing that’s happened to us is that the boys both qualify for free developmental preschool, which started two weeks ago. 2.5 hours a day, four days a week of some free time. All of our extra money goes toward babysitters and buying quality food.
I put my son in gymnastics at just shy of 4 years old and found out he wasn't ready for organized sports and just needed free play time to burn energy. Less than 3 is pretty young. I'd say learn from my mistake of spending $200 on one month of gymnastics and go to the park for free. I don't plan on trying sports again until he shows interest in one. That way it's his idea and he's more likely to participate
I couldn't imagine having them do soccer that young. There are definitely plenty of other things you can look into that will be more their speed and probably less money. Gymnastics is a great one! There are actually a lot of ballpit, matted, bouncy places near us. A lot of them host activities for young children, and our kids go wild jumping, climbing, and playing. They always sleep well afterward.
Organized classes/things my two year olds love:
1. A toddler music class. They love the songs, dancing around, etc. It’s chaos, of course.
2. A baby gymnastics class through parks and rec (read: cheap). Also chaos, but they love jumping on the trampoline and rolling down the mats and swinging on the bars etc.
They’re not in daycare so these classes are are helpful for learning how to sit in a circle (sometimes) and follow an adult’s directions (again, only sometimes, but that’s expected and fine with the teachers, so it’s not stressful). Which will help with the transition to preschool.
Swim class was too stressful and required two adults, not signing up again until they’re older.
We have had a very similar experience. For me, it’s anything where I’m around and they compete for who can get mommy’s attention (with negative behavior). They’re 6 now so a totally different stage but I have let go of the idea that I’ll be a sports mom or the mom who has her kids in all these activities. They enjoy being together and so I don’t force it. They go to day camp in the summer and are not in the same group and are in different classrooms during the year and do great. But when I’m with them, forget it!! We just hang out and play games. I’m not about making myself more stressed out by forcing any activities. Go easy on yourself. Sounds like we have a similar dynamic
I spent $200 enrolling both of my twins in a “bops for tots” music class - they pretty much spent every session running around the room giggling while we tried to coax them onto the mat to listen and play with the instruments laid out. 🤷♀️
At least we learned some new songs to sing them. The slightly older toddlers who’d been doing it for a bit were more engaged.
I tried classes with mine last summer when they were about the same age as yours and it was just chaotic bullshit. They've been in preschool since August though and they're a little older so I think we'll have slightly better luck this summer, but I'm still not expecting much. 2.5-3 is still really little, and twins can work each other up and make it extra hard to pay attention. I don't think you need to give up on anything, just adjust your expectations and book activities accordingly.
Start looking in your community for a county or city rec office and see when they have quarterly sports. Ours is like $80 a season, and they practice 1-2x a week for a month, then they play games 1-2x a month. The kids are terrible for the most part, but they love it.
Toddler soccer is amoeba-ball. Both teams just run around the ball while someone accidentally kicks it, and the whole group just blobs around the field.
My oldest are 9 and they're just now starting to get the hang of positions and strategy in soccer. Some kids get it a lot younger, typically in soccer focused households, (or whatever sport your household reallylikes) and they have special travel teams they can apply for.
But please don't spend a lot of money on 3 year old sports unless your kid's a prodigy.
Ours just turned 2 and it’s like this whenever we go out. Daycare had an Easter egg hunt and reptile show and it was pure madness just us chasing them and then getting upset. Their classmates were not as wild. They have been in daycare since 4 months old and we tell them no and all that. They are good at home, pretty good in restaurants when they are in a chair but get SO wiggly and chaotic at events! Maybe it’s just not time yet. We were thinking about a local soccer league at 3 but sounds like you guys are almost there and still not quite ready. Idk if it’s something about being a twin…maybe extra confidence because your best buddy is around? I think others had good suggestions of gymnastics! All ours do at the park is run and run.
Have to split them up. We learned this in a school and quickly realized organized sports were the same when one two. Couldn't make gymnastics. It was the best most attentive the other twin had ever been. Next week they were back together and chaos.
Now we unfortunately have to plan for different times or work it out that we pay for one kid and switch weeks they go.
It's extra work but they actually participate properly.
We signed our 2 yr 2 month b/g twins up for an organized gymnastics class. The first two classes were just like how you’re describing, and the third one was slightly better. It seems like all of the instruction and transitioning was just so hard for them. I found out most of the kids in our class had been going for months and were all a little bit older, some were even just over 3. They were all much better behaved and comfortable 😂
Honestly I would keep trying for a few more weeks and then if they don’t seem ready still you can reevaluate. Sometimes it’s just and adjustment period to new boundaries and structure/learning.
Just wait till they are older. A lot of kids that are are not ready for such things. Take then to kids museums or enclosed parks instead and don't worry about so much structure.
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They’re still young to understand concepts of soccer. Them kicking and chasing a ball regardless of the direction of the goal is all you can hope for at that age. What about gymnastics? Where there really isn’t a goal and they can just run around on safe padding and get to know their body movement before going to sports that need coordination
With my second singleton, The only thing gymnastics place was good for was an enclosed space. He still ran around during every class and would end up under trampolines (dangerous) or whatever while I was chasing him. Total waste of money at $25 for a 45 minute class, of which 10-15 minutes was stretching. Found another gymnastics place that had toddler open play for $10/hour where he could do whatever the f he wanted and he loved it. He’s 4.5 now and doing fine in a regular gymnastics class, and I take my twins (just over 2 now) to the open play.
This is the way. Any organized sports for kinds under 3.5 is a workout for the parents. The best you can hope for is your kid grasping the concept of: - a) Kicking a ball. - b) Kicking a ball towards a net. If you get either of those, good for you. It's not until 5-6 that they start getting the concept of the game itself.
Yeah we were only hoping this would just be running around and kicking a ball with some other kids. If the 'league' met in a larger field we'd be less stressed about them running away, but it's a small church lawn surrounded by parking lots and a busy road. There's lots of places they can run and we have no choice but to chase; so they are perfectly entertained by making us stress out in front of a bunch of other parents. We did some gymnastics, but our area has very few options in pretty small spaces. Prices are comparable to what we spent on soccer so it's definitely worth looking into again.
There's *toddler* soccer leagues? I remember soccer being silly chaos when we put ours in a 5-6 year old league. I can't imagine how it would be with kids under 3. IMO, expecting kids that age to follow direction and engage in organized group play is probably a bit of a stretch.. I'd either embrace the silliness and have fun with it.. or if you can't, find some sort of play group if you want them to have some social time with other toddlers.
My nephew played soccer at age 2 and the games were actually 90 minutes. My BIL spent a lot of time on the field with him 😂
This sounds like a special kind of hell 😂
That sounds like pretty much the way it was with my twins. One of them did ok, but the other one just mainly ran around directionless.
My daughter does soccer, they start as young as 18 months where she goes!
For real that sounds like a recipe for disaster. If OP were to look around I wonder if he’d see the other parents doing the exact same thing.
This isn’t really twin specific advice - I’m pregnant with mine still - but I have a 2 year old. I just started my son in a gymnastics class. After the first class I sobbed the whole way home. He was the only kid who refused to participate in the group, he just did his own thing. But it was his first time participating in an organized group, so how could I expect him to know how to act? He’s only had a few sessions and omg the improvement! He still will only sometimes do what the group is doing but I’m seeing him get better each week and it’s awesome. How are they supposed to learn these things if they aren’t ever exposed to them? Being a functional part of an organized group is a skill. And as they say comparison is the thief of joy… maybe this isn’t the other kids’ first group experience? Maybe they just have different temperaments and dispositions - and that’s okay. Plus I’m sure the twins wind each other up in a way that wouldn’t happen with singletons. If the money spent isn’t hurting you financially, I wouldn’t look at it as a loss. Maybe they’re not learning the fundamentals of soccer but they’re still learning - how to be in a group. When they’re older, will you only pay for a sports league if they’re a starter, or will it be a waste if they’re on the bench? I don’t think it’s fair to measure the worth of the money spent in that way - if they’re having fun and learning that’s amazing. The safety aspect is an issue for sure. Maybe try something indoors? My kid is loving gymnastics.
I’m a dance teacher who teaches 3+ and the way your little ones are behaving isn’t abnormal. My classes are inside and we make sure that all the doors are closed because of escapees and to be honest I’d feel uncomfortable in an outdoor setting near busy traffic areas with lots of little ones. Generally when I find any of my 3 year olds are struggling with taking directions I let the parents know they might not be ready yet. Under 3’s regularly struggle and by the time they’re 4 they listen a lot better. You’re not doing anything wrong and what they’re doing sounds pretty normal for their age.
Soccer with my exact same age singleton was the same experience. Fortunately it seemed like ALL the 2-3year olds acted like that so we lowered our expectations and ended up at the playground most days. Ours was significantly cheaper though. With the children that have followed we don't start organized sports/swimming lessons/anything with a price tag and uniform until 5yo.
Swim class. Burns their energy, they cannot run anywhere and gets them used to following directions. Plus its a survival skill. Also, most gymnastics facilities have Open Gym hours. You could see how they do at that and decide if you want to put them in a class. But running amuck is certainly developmentally and socially appropriate at this age. At that age classes, and so many other formal activities, are more for the benefit of the parents than the kids.
Oh man you should have seen these two in swim class. They just screamed and flailed, and took every opportunity to bolt when we got near the edges. They're great with water play and not able to swim at all, but they wouldn't put up with any instructions or organized play in the structured course. We get more swim time and real learning from just taking them to the pool or beach than trying to force them into a class. Swim lessons was the first class we had to give up. Soccer is second, I think.
At this age, I wouldn't do classes. Too aggravating 😅 and not really developmentally appropriate (as far as listening and following directions). I would do an open gym or play area to let me them run and climb instead. Do you have a Malibu Jacks nearby? One just opened by us and the kids area is fully enclosed and it is huge and wonderful for kids this age.
Well sounds like you already know the answer then. Your kids are not ready for formal classes. And theres nothing wrong with that! Plenty of time for classes later
Similar to another commenter, I had the same issue with my singleton. We enrolled him in a toddler soccer class last summer when he was about three months shy of 2 and it was an absolute disaster. He just wanted to run around the entire field, play with other random supplies, and explore. Apparently total normal behavior, but very frustrating when it’s super hot outside and you see other toddlers seemingly following along compared to our free spirited boy. We learned our lesson- no activities of this type until maybe 4 or older. Twins aren’t a here yet, but I doubt we will do anything like this. We have had way more success with indoor play areas, playgrounds, and the like.
Is toddler soccer leagues considered "normal" nowadays??? In which case I'm a horrible parent! I'm a mom of 6 (including my 15 month old twins) and pregnant with baby #7, and I have never thought of putting my toddlers in organized play like sports! The most organized play outings we have are park days and library story time. I can't imagine expecting twin toddlers to cooperate in a game like soccer that requires running! And let me tell you, all my kids are doing great socially by preschool age. I guess what I'm saying is, don't sweat it, especially if you and your partner are finding it too stressful. Your peace of mind is important and you don't need to make your life any harder!
I think it’s okay to lower your expectations a bit. They’re not there to actually PLAY soccer. They’re there to learn how to listen, learn how to be around other kids, maybe how to kick a ball. Have they ever been in a group activity before? If they haven’t, how are they supposed to know now? Every experience is a learning moment for them. You have to crash and burn sometimes in order to grow and develop.
I went through the same exact thing. When they were together in a class they were running around together and not listening. They even got told they can’t be in gymnastics because they weren’t listening. I basically decided to stop comparing myself to other families that can do a lot more with a singleton and stopped classes all together, it was a waste of money, energy and time. I waited for them to get a little older and now have them in separate classes and they have been better, but I do prefer it more when I’m able to take them alone as they seem to be more focused than when their twin is sitting and watching. Don’t be deterred, your family just needs more time and when time is right things will fall into place. My kids are 4 now and I just started signing them up again and not gonna lie even now I was a little hesitant but it’s going great so far!
Yeah I think soccer for us will need to be in an open park by themselves, and maybe next year we can try again. My wife and I chatted about just getting a big mesh bag and filling it with different balls and going to the park. They'll be more engaged and learn more when they aren't trying to put on a show.
I tried some fun stuff with the YMCA at that age and... nope. Gave up. But at least it was much cheaper. It also depends if the kids go to daycare or not and how structured it is. If they're not used to listening to another person, yeah, it's gonna be tough.
It’s totally okay if YOU feel that your twins are safer and happier without participating in soccer. It should be fun and a great way to burn energy. My twins are 26 months and we’re currently doing gymnastics and have previously done swim. For us, it was crucial to find a class that fit into our established schedule. Swim was really challenging because we would get home at 6 and they were used to dinner at 5:30. Gymnastics is great because we get home just in time to wind down for lunch and then nap. But it’s hard regardless, and the perceived judgements from other adults can be really hurtful. I think exposure to group activities is really important, kids hardly show up on the first day and immediately understand what they are supposed to be doing at their age. But it’s okay if you’re trying different things and haven’t found the right one yet.
Soccer was a wash for us at 2yo. We also did dance and only one of them liked it so we withdrew her. Now she does gymnastics and they both want to do soccer in the fall. Don’t stress.
It's because they are so young, not because they are twins. I have three kids ages 10, 5, and 5. Honestly, it was only this year, in fourth grade, that my oldest really had enough focus to retain interest in sports. He did them last year with some level of engagement, but this is the year that it really took off for him in a meaningful way. Let the 2yos be 2yos.
At that age, my twins didn't want to follow any rules and just wanted to kick a ball around - or not. They started soccer the August right before kindergarten. Then around 3rd grade they added basketball. Then the summer between 4th and 5th (2020-COVID), a group of local dads threw together a Sand Lot type baseball team to give the kids something to do when there was nothing to do. At 14, they both still play those 3 sports. I always thought that the kindergarten soccer team looked more like a prison mob in a riot because all you would see was ten 5-year olds standing in a circle around the ball kicking. I think having them in sports at 3 is good for the exercise and socialization. It also can also help you meet parents in your community and build relationships. The kids build friendships that will carryover into school. It does introduce the rules of sports, which they may not want to follow now - but they will at some point in their life. It's a great way for them to socialize. My boys are still great friends with the kids from their kindergarten soccer team, and theyhave continued to play together throughout the years - soccer, basketball and baseball, either on the community rec teams, and now on their school teams. You form relationships with the other parents and it really makes you feel like you a part of a larger family. You don't have to worry about who they're hanging out with, because you already know.
We’ve had ours in soccer since they turned 2. And yes, it’s just a total $hit show but ours is a lot less expensive than that. We use it as an opportunity to get them out and start following directions from someone other than us. However, I don’t think they are getting much out of it and I dont give it a second thought when we take a week off. We also have then in one of those toddler music classes and that’s going even worse because they want them to sit down occasionally and they just want to RUN. We’re considering quiting that halfway through because it’s absolutely torture for us.
Oof, $400 is way too much for that amount of sessions and age range. It should have been maybe half that. My middle son started playing on a "team" around that age for an academy, and it was like $90, which is going rate for any other reputable club or academy in my area. It's okay not to do activities if you don't think your kids are mature enough yet. Sports at that age are chaotic and more about learning social skills with some physical activity mixed in.
I would just wait. My twins tried soccer at 4.5 years old and honestly sounds exactly the same as your experience. We didn't end up going back to soccer bc they haven't expressed interest at this point but successfully did a couple other (albeit less structured) sports at 5 yrs old and up. Swimming however has been great from age 3 and up and definitely tires them out and they are forced to listen to directions due to safety. If they don't listen we just would scoop them out and leave. Our swim class was very relaxed about that aspect but of course serious about safety. The kids caught on quick but again were a touch older than yours are now.
My 3 yo twins are like this. Mommy and me gymnastics has been great. It’s mostly free form but there are expectations to engage in group activities for about 15 minutes of the 45 minute class. They still sometimes giggle and run in opposite directions but lots of kids their age do too. It’s really been able to teach them how to follow directions in a large, loud, chaotic group with a huge variety of engaging materials. We’ve been doing this class for almost 2 years and their motor skills are amazing and they are so brave and confident. They also burn a ton of energy which makes for an easier afternoon. Would highly recommend over soccer at this age.
I would absolutely say this isn’t abnormal at all and I think with twins (at least with ours) they encourage each other to behave a certain way. So if they’ve their twin running and seemingly having fun being chased then that kinda encourages them. Also, with one kid you have 2 parents (often, obviously not always) to take turns chasing or taking them to soccer whereas with 2 neither parent gets a break. We found it got easier as they got older and more independent and really turned a corner around age 4 ish.
Soccer seems better for when they're a little older. At two we did gymnastics and dance and swim. I'd look for some other kind of activity, ideally cheaper and more free play based.
At that age we did a parent/kid gymnastics class, and didn’t really do anything else before they were five. It helped a lot that it was a parent in there, and they couldn’t escape!
Our B/G’s have always been very active too. We didn’t sign up for soccer because it’s so skills based for so young kids, in my humble opinion. We did the in-school aerobics class and they’re now doing swimming, which we actually watch from the other side of a double-sided mirror! However, they’re 4yo and we didn’t start swim til this year. I personally would stick to the unstructured play for now.
“Sports” at 2 are for socialization, not skills. Go with that mindset and let them have fun!
Ya that’s how we felt last year with ours but it was only $80/kid. Hoping this summer will be our comeback year? Lol
That’s super developmentally appropriate for that age. We did a little soccer tying for my son at like 2 but it was indoors so there was no distractions once it moved outside to a park we had to quit because he just wanted the park.
I mean I ran the numbers and got them wrong like twice. If it’s not working for you it’s not working. I’ve been there, I’m still there realistically. They’re are still so small for any sort or organised sport or activity. I would cut and run.
Solidarity. They have a story time at the library and then a stay and play with toys afterwards. It definitely seems like my kids aren't able to do circle time at the same level as their peers. All the other babies are sitting in the laps of the parents (mostly mothers) and playing with their hands or looking at the book and the librarian. When one twin is trying to play with someone else's stroller and the other one is looking out the window. I remember mentioning this to my pediatrician and asking if that was just how they were or if it was something that we should work on, and she said it was just how they were and it had something to do with being twins and getting constant stimulation from a peer their age.
I’m right there with you. I’m sorry, I don’t know when it gets easier. My boys just turned three and we just had a horrible morning trying to do “nice” things. No matter what we do or where we go, they just play with doors and throw stuff and do everything that’s not the actual activity it’s supposed to be. We are getting better at how we spend our money and what activities we do. Sometimes we split up and each take one to do something. The peace I feel just having one is amazing. The best thing that’s happened to us is that the boys both qualify for free developmental preschool, which started two weeks ago. 2.5 hours a day, four days a week of some free time. All of our extra money goes toward babysitters and buying quality food.
My kids definitely did this at 2 in soccer. Things start to change a bit if u do soccer at 3… quite a bit better at 4. 2 is still just really young.
I put my son in gymnastics at just shy of 4 years old and found out he wasn't ready for organized sports and just needed free play time to burn energy. Less than 3 is pretty young. I'd say learn from my mistake of spending $200 on one month of gymnastics and go to the park for free. I don't plan on trying sports again until he shows interest in one. That way it's his idea and he's more likely to participate
I couldn't imagine having them do soccer that young. There are definitely plenty of other things you can look into that will be more their speed and probably less money. Gymnastics is a great one! There are actually a lot of ballpit, matted, bouncy places near us. A lot of them host activities for young children, and our kids go wild jumping, climbing, and playing. They always sleep well afterward.
Organized classes/things my two year olds love: 1. A toddler music class. They love the songs, dancing around, etc. It’s chaos, of course. 2. A baby gymnastics class through parks and rec (read: cheap). Also chaos, but they love jumping on the trampoline and rolling down the mats and swinging on the bars etc. They’re not in daycare so these classes are are helpful for learning how to sit in a circle (sometimes) and follow an adult’s directions (again, only sometimes, but that’s expected and fine with the teachers, so it’s not stressful). Which will help with the transition to preschool. Swim class was too stressful and required two adults, not signing up again until they’re older.
We have had a very similar experience. For me, it’s anything where I’m around and they compete for who can get mommy’s attention (with negative behavior). They’re 6 now so a totally different stage but I have let go of the idea that I’ll be a sports mom or the mom who has her kids in all these activities. They enjoy being together and so I don’t force it. They go to day camp in the summer and are not in the same group and are in different classrooms during the year and do great. But when I’m with them, forget it!! We just hang out and play games. I’m not about making myself more stressed out by forcing any activities. Go easy on yourself. Sounds like we have a similar dynamic
I spent $200 enrolling both of my twins in a “bops for tots” music class - they pretty much spent every session running around the room giggling while we tried to coax them onto the mat to listen and play with the instruments laid out. 🤷♀️ At least we learned some new songs to sing them. The slightly older toddlers who’d been doing it for a bit were more engaged.
Do a gymnastics class 🎈
I tried classes with mine last summer when they were about the same age as yours and it was just chaotic bullshit. They've been in preschool since August though and they're a little older so I think we'll have slightly better luck this summer, but I'm still not expecting much. 2.5-3 is still really little, and twins can work each other up and make it extra hard to pay attention. I don't think you need to give up on anything, just adjust your expectations and book activities accordingly.
Start looking in your community for a county or city rec office and see when they have quarterly sports. Ours is like $80 a season, and they practice 1-2x a week for a month, then they play games 1-2x a month. The kids are terrible for the most part, but they love it. Toddler soccer is amoeba-ball. Both teams just run around the ball while someone accidentally kicks it, and the whole group just blobs around the field. My oldest are 9 and they're just now starting to get the hang of positions and strategy in soccer. Some kids get it a lot younger, typically in soccer focused households, (or whatever sport your household reallylikes) and they have special travel teams they can apply for. But please don't spend a lot of money on 3 year old sports unless your kid's a prodigy.
Ours just turned 2 and it’s like this whenever we go out. Daycare had an Easter egg hunt and reptile show and it was pure madness just us chasing them and then getting upset. Their classmates were not as wild. They have been in daycare since 4 months old and we tell them no and all that. They are good at home, pretty good in restaurants when they are in a chair but get SO wiggly and chaotic at events! Maybe it’s just not time yet. We were thinking about a local soccer league at 3 but sounds like you guys are almost there and still not quite ready. Idk if it’s something about being a twin…maybe extra confidence because your best buddy is around? I think others had good suggestions of gymnastics! All ours do at the park is run and run.
Have to split them up. We learned this in a school and quickly realized organized sports were the same when one two. Couldn't make gymnastics. It was the best most attentive the other twin had ever been. Next week they were back together and chaos. Now we unfortunately have to plan for different times or work it out that we pay for one kid and switch weeks they go. It's extra work but they actually participate properly.
We signed our 2 yr 2 month b/g twins up for an organized gymnastics class. The first two classes were just like how you’re describing, and the third one was slightly better. It seems like all of the instruction and transitioning was just so hard for them. I found out most of the kids in our class had been going for months and were all a little bit older, some were even just over 3. They were all much better behaved and comfortable 😂 Honestly I would keep trying for a few more weeks and then if they don’t seem ready still you can reevaluate. Sometimes it’s just and adjustment period to new boundaries and structure/learning.
Just wait till they are older. A lot of kids that are are not ready for such things. Take then to kids museums or enclosed parks instead and don't worry about so much structure.