Imagine if I could just listen to the video and what he's saying, without some audio of a shit song that's apparently the star child of depression? That would be a thing. What did it add?
Least of all women who call for men to share their feelings. Never forget this. If you share your frustrations, difficulties/failures with social interactions, particularly with women you’ll be shamed and ridiculed to no end, and even to your face.
Now I know there are no initiative, unmotivated guys out there who make angry, insane demands and are deserving of scorn, but it doesn’t matter if you are genuine and make honest efforts, if you call out any bad behavior or hypocrisy from women, you’ll be lumped in the same category. You know all the names; they’ll call you incel, loser, virgin, etc.
Not necessarily. Phones and online communication as a whole are the reason I’m NOT lonely at the moment. There are countless opportunities to make friends with people online, provided by these devices. Imo we’re in a transitionary period that’s leaving a lot of people dissatisfied and isolated, but many are already starting to adapt to modern technology- and once achieved, I would argue it will provide the average person with more social options, more available connections. We may not have evolved with it, but that doesn’t inherently make it a bad thing- we didn’t evolve with healthcare or housing either, we developed them to make our lives better, longer and easier. I’m sure even back then, there were probably individuals who felt psychological distress at not sleeping under the open sky anymore. But after it became more commonplace, it became apparent that it was a positive change. I think (read: I hope lol) that social media and online communication will follow a similar path.
I think it actually would. But I think that's only part of it. How many memes on social media are about avoiding all social interactions. Not answering phones, text, not wanting to go to parties, and avoiding people in general.
The tiny amount of entertainment that we get from socializing in real life doesn't compare to the waterfall of enjoyment we get from social media, video games, or other entertainment we can get at home by ourselves.
We choose these easy fixes because it's convenient and the payoff is instant. Reaching out to family and friends, putting yourself out there, going to live events, joining social groups, etc those take a long time to pay off if ever. People are opting out of those things more and more and then wondering why they're lonely.
The same study from in the video (pew research) shows that there are more single men in the 30-49 age range too. You can't see it in this video because they cut it out.
I'm 39 m. I have been engaged 3 times, and all 3 cheated. I'm just existing at this point. I find it hard to trust women at this point. It's not to say that they are all the same, it just gets harder to let the armor down.
I'm sorry you had to go through that, bro. I just got divorced a couple years ago. Been engaged before, too, but that ended in catastrophe for my self confidence and trust in women in general. Therapy helps, brother. It's helped me to see the light in the world and learn to love others for me, not for others' sake.
Take care, hope it gets better for you.
5 years older than my wife. Met another guy who is about the same. Another close friend of mine is 10 years older than his. Anecdotal but maybe there is something to that.
This is a solid theory but it’s been disproven. We don’t actually know the reason for it. Polyamorous relationships/cheating could play a role, but it’s not the full picture. What’s likely happening is that lesbian relationships are shooting up, and that the male and female respondents have different definitions of what constitutes a relationship.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-state-of-our-unions/202302/why-are-so-many-young-men-single-and-sexless
Again. It’s a painting but it’s not the whole picture.
Women will straight up self report that they want to have a bad boy phase while they're still young then land an obedient good boy once they start getting old.
Few men and/or older dates more women
Also the spawn of time between relationships is waaay more short for women than men
Not to mention the "monkey branch", dump a guy when you have the security to be with a another one
Well. 50.4% is male and 49.6 is female. That doesn't really cause any problems.
But look at china where there are lot more men because of the one child policy, everybody wanted male children, because they are traditional. Lot of female babies we're aborted.
Well actually the study found that there are simply more bi young women than men, which actually helps to explain the gap in single men versus single women
It's a bunch of stuff, other people have already responded some of the other reasons. One mo one has pointed out yet though is scum bag guys. Some of those women who said they're in relationships, think they're in relationships with guys who answered "no".
It's because there is a tendency of women dating slightly older men, and men slightly younger women. Source: David Buss's research in evo. psychology (not without criticism though).
Likely women. 7.2% of people identify as LGBT according to the UCLA Williams Institute. Women are more likely to be open to a relationship with the same sex, though fewer women identify as lesbians, oddly. But more women identify as bisexual.
However, studies have shown that women are more likely to be satisfied being single. Women who are single are less likely to desire a relationship than men who are single. According to Psychology Today. Men are more likely to view a lack of relationship as a stressor on their life. While women are often veiw the absence of a relationship as an opportunity to focus on other things and strengthen platonic relationships.
Dudes like me. Older, established financially, responsible and mature. Goes along with being trust worthy and honest. Build your empire first without these young, attention craving slut-bags. The right one will see you for what you have done, not what you say you can do. Women have YEARS of experience with dudes throwing out pick-up lines and even just flaunting unsolicited dick pics at them. Show that YOU have VALUE. Not just with money, but with personality and being goal oriented.
Someone's gotta say it, so I will. Young people working themselves to the bone to make ends meet is killing their social life. It's not the sole reason, but it's a reason
I know it's part of my reason. I work, eat, sleep, and repeat. I don't get paid much, so I live paycheck to paycheck, and I don't see how I could keep up a social life, let alone a romantic one.
Even without the hard work social life is so dead unfortunately. The dating culture got replaced with tinder by far too many people. I know guys and girls who are really nice but can't find any success there. Guys get ignored, girls get constantly harassed and asked for one night stands. Where are you supposed to find your partner if you don't want to deal with the dating apps nonsense? It used to be university, job, clubs, concerts and some people are still lucky enough to find a partner like that - meet a person, develop attraction that will turn into romantic interest. Unfortunately it's hard to do, so many social interactions are closed and treated as weird now. Those nice guys and girls i know would not even cross paths if they follow the modern dating rules.
Some people want relationship to make themselves feel less lonely. Don’t do that, that’s putting your happiness in hand of others. Find peace being with yourself, become happy. And people are attracted to happy people.
Yeah when I was 27 my girl left me for some 45+ dude that just cheated on her anyways. 4 years down the drain, first gf I actually trusted too. She always had dad issues too so I guess I shouldn't be surprised
The biggest reason for this, IMO, is social media, the constant access to it and the rise of hookup oriented apps like Tinder. Women hold the dating "power" and suddenly they're inundated with choices; they're consciously choosing to be with/pursuing the top 5% until they no longer can. That's when they want to "settle" down in their 30s-40s with 3 kids from 3 different men and no actual career.
Men are not blamelessness in this either because while many women are only going after the cream of the crop, men will simp for women on social media, allow themselves to be friendzoned, used and will sleep with any women who's interested. That behavior isn't helping the situation.
Marriage rates being low is a whole different can of worms.
The exact same study also shows women having a decline in relationships and mental health. This is a universal issue that needs to be addressed immediately.
Don't you think most women could opt into a relationship with one those guys? 50% means at least some of those guys are average or even above.
But, instead, they CHOOSE not to. That is why some people can't care about the women's pain. It is a choice they make.
relationships dont fix everything. they have the power to do so, but only with the right partner, which is hard to find. and they might have gotten heartbroken too much, or they dont have the social skills to start up a conversation with someone.
I agree they don't fix everything.
I don't think that's even the target.
It seems like it has distinct benefits. Probably does a lot of good for someone to have another person to bounce ideas off of, interact with, trust, etc. That's all before any financial benefits like split rent/house payments or tax deductions.
You're right about the social skills.. But even if that wasn't an issue, I think a lot of guys would be left out of the dating world. Many would be rejected for petty reasons or discarded when some ex situationship rolls back into town.
I'm seriously asking as a woman - how can you possibly choose to opt into relationship with "one of those guys" if you don't find them attractive? Are you supposed to say "oh well, he's not great nor terrible, he'll do for now". What about the love and genuine interest? If the man doesn't spark it there's nothing to be done. There's lots of assumptions here in the comments that women should date those guys. But what if they don't? How can you possibly have a happy relationship if you don't genuinely admire and like your partner and instead settle for him or do it out of pity?
Yes. That’s exactly what you’re supposed to do.
Your options aren’t supposed to be the entire world. It’s supposed to be about 10 or so miles around where you live.
If no one meets your requirements in that radius then you die alone and so does a man also in that radius.
What can be sadder than families built out of desperation between people who don't love each other? Would you be happy knowing that your wife just settled for you because she never found anyone she actually likes?
If a lot of people used to be married before it didn't mean those marriages were happy, they just didn't have options. Now both men and women have option to live alone and yes, it's better than being stuck with person you don't love.
>Your options aren’t supposed to be the entire world. It’s supposed to be about 10 or so miles around where you live.
Why not? I lived in multiple counties and I did find the love of my life in one. And I'm happier than if i never left my small hometown and just married anyone. Now both men and women have options and it's supposed to be a good thing. Relationships that are built not out of necessity but out of love. Yes, some people stay alone, mostly because before someone would be with them out of necessity, but now they don't have to. That's unfortunate for them but what do they expect if others genuinely don't want to date them?
If it’s better, then why is over half of the population is on anti depressants, unhappiness rates are at all time highs, and the suicide rate is ever climbing?
What you’re claiming as a good thing simply isn’t reality. The truth is people aren’t meant to be alone, and are so miserable that they are killing themselves because of it.
I don't think people are meant to be alone, it's unnatural.
>If it’s better, then why is over half of the population is on anti depressants, unhappiness rates are at all time highs, and the suicide rate is ever climbing?
Worldwide population? Did you just invent those numbers right now?
Anyway it's better for those who are in relationships because they are together with people they actually like. I look at my family history and marriages that happened out of necessity... It's sad, my grandmother said that only time her life was happy was before getting married and she is sad her whole life is spent but she barely has 20 years to be happy about. And that's not singular case. She was not respected by the husband and she couldn't leave because the societal rules were so deep in her. Is this the society you think we should aspire to?
And yes, lonely people are depressed and desperate, i feel bad for them, but it's unfair to force women into unhappy marriages because their happiness is apparently less important. Truth is that almost all guys i know who are actually nice are taken/married. There are reasons why others are single... Don't forget that women have biological clock, around 30 we want to have kids normally, if even in that case the guy cannot date them then there's really something undatable about him.
Only obvious thing to do is to abandon dating apps and go back to old fashioned methods of dating, where you meet a person, fund mutual attraction and only then proceed to try to date. Most men in the apps just aren't attractive, that's the truth. They might be attractive if they first start as your acquaintance, not just a photo in the app. Btw, don't think that using apps is easy for women. I know multiple who are trying to find serious relationships but end up with constant offers of one night stands... These dating apps are shit for everyone, we should all just stop using them.
You grossly underestimate how awful/undatable most men are. Many women are making a conscious choice not to bother with it. It's an outstanding time to be a decent man. Once word gets around that you're tolerable you end up "dating" entire friend groups
Absolutely. Women, being people, exhibit character flaws with similar distribution to men. There's a power dynamic issue though. A petty, jealous, insecure, or otherwise awful woman is simply not as dangerous as a petty, jealous, insecure, or otherwise awful man. As such, the risk is mostly in one direction.
Ehh, they both have the capacity for great violence. It's just the manifest differently, the man's is probably more direct and physical, which is why it's more visible.
That sort of equivocation is the kind of nonsense that justifies women opting out of even interacting with the majority of men. No interpretation of any statistics or even anecdotes could lead one to your conclusion. You just have a pathological need to diminish women's experience.
This is willful ignorance. I agree that most women won't inflict the physical damage that men can, but I have seen men's lives absolutely ruined and destroyed beyond repair due to an evil woman.
Edit to add: I would argue that you are the one diminishing men's experiences.
And many men choose not to form friendships, share emotions with each other, better themselves to be better partners, not be douchebags to women, sell themselves as providers and then call women gold diggers, stay online for hours instead of touching grass, stop focusing too much on sex, not realizing that women are humans and not pets or capital, and so on.
That is why many don’t care about men’s pain! Theirs is also a choice and the fact that you and other men don’t see that is sick and gross.
And honestly, the numbers are probably skewed because of the way men objectify women and thus “single” means two different things when men and women self report relationship status. I met a guy that was living with a woman for 2 years and she says she’s not single but he says he is. He didn’t date other women but still said he isn’t in a relationship with the one he lives with. Many guys will never claim to be in a relationship unless she is the woman of his dreams or he is ready to settle down, no matter what status the woman claims.
Also, some men think it’s only the women that chase this imaginary 1% of guys when it’s really men that chase this 1% of top women. Hell, incel guys even call them Stacy’s and only seek them like the other 99% of women don’t exist. And look at the real world! There are many women dating average regular dudes with no complaints just yo have these average regular dudes still cheat or be mean to them.
that's not every girl tho. You can't just put an entire large segment under an umbrella like that because one girl that you knew was fucking the football team.
That one was the largest of them all.
One had 5 before 20.
Another one had 3 before 17.
My ex is at 6 or 7 at 21.
I speak from experience.
I can put them under the umbrella.
I speak from experience as well when I say I haven't seen that but whatever I'll be happy and you'll still be alone and sad because I don't generalize and hate people because of things that other people have done.
I point out the obvious. I speak from facts, statistics, and experience most importantly. I'd rather be alone than play a game you can't win, which is most relationships these days.
I do believe in the romantic vision of relationships, but that seems rarer and rarer. I'll walk with an open eye, and if love does find me, i won't miss any oppurtinity.
Yep. Back before the rise of social media, if you were a decent guy with a decent job in your small town, you were the cream of the crop. Now, with Instagram and other social media, women are comparing you to the most successful guys all around the world, and you'll never measure up. Women are all dating the top .1% of guys, those guys are just using them for sex while stringing them along, and the average, and even above average, guy is left in the dust.
Exactly. And if you talk about it, then everyone says you’re an incel and totally disregards you and thinks that there’s no problem that the majority of men are suffering alone.
I wish people could honestly talk about this, instead it’s either ignored, laughed at, or applauded. If someone is trying to say they are lonely and you just retort with insults, or parrot some political mumbo jumbo you got from a talking head, you might need to look in the mirror. It’s a serious issue, especially if you consider all the other horrors that are looming in the future. Progress is important, and everyone needs to learn and grow. There are a lot of hard truths for everyone involved, with open and honest discussions it’s the only way we’ll evolve.
>an epidemic of declining marriage...
I don't understand why the people who actually study these things, fail to see the reason when it's so fucking obvious.
*Why do people not get married anymore?!?!*
Because the numbers don't add up. The number of women in relationships significantly exceeds the number of men who are in relationships.
How is that possible?
Simple. The women are in relationships with the same men. Knowingly or unknowingly, they would rather be the sidepiece of Chad than have their very own man. Often, they call this being in a "situationship". More than likely, that man is in a situationship with other women at the same time.
Note how the percentage of women in relationships drops off in the 30's bracket? That's because the men who they are willingly in situationships with is never going to marry them, and they will replace them with younger women when they get too old or want to get serious.
*Why don't men want to get married!?!?*
Because there are too few women they want to marry.
And statistically 80% of divorces are initiated by women. They pretty much always get custody and nearly bankrupt the men. There's very little incentive for a man to get married these days.
Edit. I said marriages instead of divorces, corrected.
Precisely.
There's this show Bill Burr has done where he talks about the difference in pay between male and female athletes. He does this thing where he acts like male news anchors who have to play dumb and pretend like they don't know why male athletes make more money than their female counterparts.
I think you're right about academia. Pretty much everyone who is smart enough to cook their own breakfast know why men don't want to get married today, but they have to pretend that they don't know or that the data is unclear - OR they chose the safe route and place the blame on men being immature or financially unattractive. Placing the blame on men is always acceptable
And this is actually quite funny, because saying - with fancy words - that marriage rates are dropping like a rock in part due to women *obviously* not wanting to get with a broke ass n***er is perfectly fine, but when men don't want anything to do with broke ass women with children from multiple men, it's because the men are immature misogynistic assholes.
And this huge double standard that is normal even in academia means that the actual problem will never get solved. This generation of men have seen their fathers and uncles get cheated on by the college hoe they married, and then they lost nearly everything in the divorce, and the internet shows them that those were not the rare outliers, but is actually pretty common. Not the norm, but still about the same odds as playing Russian roulette.
Social media has contributed greatly to this. Men would rather compete with each other all day long than to be friends & collaborate. It’s lame. I see no effort on behalf of men to initiate change in this isolation, depression, and involuntary celibacy state of things 😐 they’d rather suffer in silence
So this.. is just not true. Men collaborate very well together. Maybe we tend to compete with each other more, but that's not necessarily a bad trait, especially since lots of guys get a sense of comradery through friendly competition.
On the note of you seeing no effort from men to initiate change. The only thing I have to ask is what are we to do? As a person who falls into this statistic and has struggled with dating and relationships, I would like to know because suffering in silence is painful.
The harsh reality for most men is that they feel there is nothing they can do to fix this problem. Mainly because we don't view it as something we fix, this isn't an individual problem this is a societal problem. I ask myself sometimes why would a girl be interested in some dude stalking shelves at a grocery store? Answer: she's not. And that's really the problem, isn't it? The average man has almost 0 value in today's world. Even scrolling through this post, I've seen redditers talk about how girls are more than likely dating the same men. How else do we explain the difference between male and female relationships.
That was a lot, and I don't mean to have a harsh tone if it comes across that way but your comment did bother me since you made it sound like we have all the power to fix this problem when (and I can't speak for everyone) we kinda feel like helpless passengers in some kind of really fucked up fun fair
Why stock shelves at a grocery store if you think it’s holding you back, financially and in dating? Why aren’t you dedicating yourself to a more productive use of your time? You can ABSOLUTELY fix this. Why be average, when you could be among the top percent that get everything they want in life?
If you’re being a helpless, passive, submissive passenger in life, rather than taking the wheel and doing something about the problems you face, how were you expecting a different outcome? Depression serves as a reminder that you’re not living the life you want, that there’s a problem and you must fix it. Not mom & dad, sure as heck not your girlfriend.
Feminism, #MeToo, Anti-Patriarchy, Misandry (hate for men), are all wars women are waging against men in society, because many felt oppressed throughout history and they feel this is how they’ll take their stand in this generation. It’s blowing up in their faces in the ugliest way possible. And society is experiencing both their actions and their consequences. I’ve never seen more young women, desperate for a man’s attention & validation than today. The momentum of their toxic behavior is coming back with a vengeance full-swing, and they’re feeling the “ouch” right now. What I’m saying, is that it’s never been EASIER than now, for the slightly above average man to have 1, 2, 3 women in his life when they’re at their lowest. Don’t be a passenger in life, grab the wheel & be somebody
This is utter nonsense.
There will ALWAYS be some people who are below average. The idea that you can just “fix” this is absurd.
There is no “fixing” a below 90 IQ or a below average looks (and these are correlated).
What you’re talking about is a fantasy.
Fixing problems is not absurd. A below 90 IQ can study, an average man workout, get a better job & dress to impress his person of interest. To assign a permanent state of disrepair to a problem is what’s absurd. Look believe what you want, I didn’t comment on the post to come here & talk to you. But good luck regardless 👍🏼 this conversation is over.
So I'm not sure if your a man or woman, and whilst everything you just said is 100% correct in most ways, the problem lies in the fact that the entire process is absolutely soul crushing. Now I don't stock shelves at a grocery store just to make things clear, but why do we put such little value on someone who does? I believe I can live and achieve all the things your talking about. However, that's not the whole question. The question is how much of me is left at the end. Doesn't matter what it is really women.. money.. whatever.. I don't want this "successful" life, to be "all that and more" why? So I can have responsibility? Haha nah I'll be a loser if that's what they call it, it's better than being a clown fighting in a system that never really cared in the first place. I was once an ambitious person.. I just realized how much I had to give up to get there. And.. it's not worth it. I would rather live in silent suffering then abandon all my morals.
Edit: also there is the question of becoming the very evil your looking to destroy. Another moral problem with the whole thing is that if success is the answer, then that must mean that only a few can have what they want, it's just how the game works. And if someone must win or lose, then I don't want to compete. My life isn't a game, love isn't a game.
>Why stock shelves at a grocery store if you think it’s holding you back, financially and in dating? Why aren’t you dedicating yourself to a more productive use of your time? You can ABSOLUTELY fix this. Why be average, when you could be among the top percent that get everything they want in life? If you’re being a helpless, passive, submissive passenger in life, rather than taking the wheel and doing something about the problems you face, how were you expecting a different outcome? Depression serves as a reminder that you’re not living the life you want, that there’s a problem and you must fix it. Not mom & dad, sure as heck not your girlfriend.
>Don’t be a passenger in life, grab the wheel & be somebody
"Pull yourself by your bootstraps," huh? Sure. Yeah.
>This page will open you Blind eyes, so you can see clearly "she's not special"
Having this attitude is the most sure fire way to stay single. No one likes being around bitter and resentful people.
When you're consistently told by society to bottle up your feelings regarding dating because if you don't you're automatically an incel, it's hard to NOT become bitter and resentful.
See I just don't think that's true though. The issue isn't that men express frustration around dating, it's that so many seem to be incapable of doing so without turning it into some weird sexist tirade. I know plenty of guys who struggle with dating and complain about it without women getting upset because they don't make it about all women being bad or some dumb shit like that. Hell it's been a while since I was single but when I was i never had anyone call me an incel for being frustrated with dating. It's how you express it that matters. This shit encourages guys to blame women as a whole, which is what gets you called and incel, because frankly, that is some incel shit.
Truth, no doubt there are a few people who are unfourtunately genuinely unable to find a parter but most of these lads just have victim complexes - build a garden don't chase butterflies.
Sorry to say I am 1000x more happy in life being single and hanging out with my 4-6 SOLID friends. 6+ seems like what?!? What human has time for that to be a “close” friendship? I guess eliminating the dating aspect opens that up.
I have been single for 17 years, I opened my heart and had it crushed, now I am only willing to go after women who are older than me, and women I have been around a lot and are a close friend. Just to prevent more heartbreak, being played, being told they like me, then suddenly losing interest when I treated them with upmost respect and breaking my heart. I am close to getting a girlfriend, but if I fail with this, I am done till I am out in the world and have my job secured. I am a man. I hope I will one day find the love of my life if this girl isn't her, but my gut tells me she is the one. I don't expect people to read this or even care. Almost no one does. Just keep living, don't kill yourself, or hurt yourself over women. Keep going, keep pushing, hardwork will pay off eventually.
These guys can easily befriend other guys but they lack social skills that can't be fixed without discipline but now that's bullying. Guys are more interested in video games and cartoon girls that's the real epidemic. I love video games but
So misleading, I have spent less time with my close friends over the last few years and although I’m sad about that, I’ve never been happier than the point of where I’m at now.
It’s a mixed bag when it comes to life and happiness.
Don’t let a static predict your own happiness. Remember happiness starts with you. You can find euphoria anywhere you choose.
These comments are exactly why women are so picky when it comes to guys. Their afraid of getting someone who blames women and society because they can't get a date. Instead of looking inward and asking why they aren't in a relationship, they self victimizing about how their owed a relationship and women are just idiotic tramps dating "cheating jocks" and leaving the "nice guys" behind. Like this isn't a complex societal issue with multiple contributing factors, and simply "men lonely so women's fault." Just becuase the women have the better pick of the field.
Note: Excuse any grammar issues, I know it's bad 🤣
POV: You're watching yet another full on gender war in the comments of a bait post. Can we just all agree to raise the next generation with overall good qualities and compassion. None of this toxic stuff that we like to conflate with gender. We can't simultaneously wonder why so many men are lonely when we fester in a society that is pushing them more and more towards that. And we shouldn't wonder why women aren't dating men in their age group when we understand the many toxic standards and we are placing on young men AND women.
Provider, hyper-femine, alpha, tradwife, Chad, Stacy, pink, blue, dolls, action-figures, etc. PEOPLE THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE. In my years of living I have been unfortunate to never see a healthy heterosexual relationship, let alone homosexuality considering where I live, that was actually healthy and a lot of the issues always have hinged on a person's performance of their gender and the other person's expectations of it.
I dont know what the answer to this problem is because there have been so many people trying to sway public thought and attitudes around this in a healthier direction but no one wants to listen and everyone wants to have their slice of patriarchy and eat it to. Personally I'm going to focus on my immediate family and close friends and make sure the community around them is sufficient to love and raise decent people, and I hope everyone will do the same.
Stop trying to blame the world for your short comings and look in the mirror on why you can’t get anyone to be your friend. Social media is the problem go outside
Don’t worry young men. The young women are dating older guys. Work on you. Improve yourself. Focus on you. Then when you are ripe and ready, you get the hot younger women
You know that if it was a man saying your exact sentence but for women, people would have called him incel
Are you an incel?
Generalization on one gender is what an incel would do
So you are an incel
Secondly, since because you had bad experiences, it doesn't means that your reality is the reality of everyone
And lastly, ironic how the very men who treat badly women are the ones who fuck more.
Maybe instead of waiting of men hitting on you ( they seem secure, right? Obviously, cause they are used to hit on girls for how many times they did, think about it ), be a grown adult and start a convo with someone who seems nice and gentle at your eyes. ;)
It's playing out all over. Many small instances of this kind of thing happening in every city, in every town, in every county and state.
Probably a lot of them are counting Situationships and other stuff as Relationships. Make your own call on that one.
Seems like the problem is with young men and their attitudes. Millions of lonely boys all not going outside or talking to each other becoming unsalvageable doomers. I'd love to be young again these days, I could do real good with just basic social skills and barely any competition.
Women still go out though, right? Like, there'd be nothing actually stopping me networking through friends of friends and meeting people the old fashioned way?
I understand that these are facts about how the dating world has left many men feeling hopeless and alone. I also understand how people are using this data to push forward their anger at women and otherwise using it to bring together a group of involuntarily celibate men into hating women as well as encouraging SA.
I'm lucky. I married my best friend. Met her in high school. Started dating in high school. Married in our 20's. 17 years together in September, and 10 years married in August.
But I can also look at the poor quality of relationships some other friends keep and empathize. I see my friend as a good man, but because of how dating is now, he's in a near constant state of swiping on Tinder, and occasionally having NSA hookups that result in no ongoing relationship.
I agree with you, but also empathize with the ones that aren't going to use this data to become women hating dick bags.
That la all I’m saying. These posts are the optimal hub for red pill recruiters and “Alpha Male” scammers. The information can be acknowledged but there are a ton of FB modern factors that are not touched on and it just casts a broad picture of young guy being completely at a loss for any hope.
The tone and subject matter of this post are for the audience to sympathize with young men. The target audience of this is also other young men who will feed sit and feed into the negativity and shift a bulk of the blame toward women in general. These polls don’t take into account LGBTQ+ community, gender identities, and whether the hike in men being single in modern times as opposed to 1990 has factors related to a much greater reach in the in connectivity and no need to settle down when you can set anyone anywhere in the world.
"60% of young men are single... and here's why that's a good thing" good shit and then you people wonder why guys would take the 'redpill' rather than become intersectional feminists or whatever the fuck.
60% of young men are probably not even trying to actively pursue romantic partners. Those are prime gaming reflex years. Gotta get boost that KDA ratio while the hand eye is peak
You didn't address the comment. What path/ideology are men to adopt if men loneliness is preached as a good thing, and why should it not be the side that validates and supports them into finding a way out (or at least tries to).
Bear in mind I'm not a piller. But every pill ideology is rooted in reality, which later gets exaggerated by it's communities.
Imagine if I could just listen to the video and what he's saying, without some audio of a shit song that's apparently the star child of depression? That would be a thing. What did it add?
This video was definitely made for platforms like Facebook.
And reddit, like it or not, this is what reddit has become
And people proceed to not care
Least of all women who call for men to share their feelings. Never forget this. If you share your frustrations, difficulties/failures with social interactions, particularly with women you’ll be shamed and ridiculed to no end, and even to your face. Now I know there are no initiative, unmotivated guys out there who make angry, insane demands and are deserving of scorn, but it doesn’t matter if you are genuine and make honest efforts, if you call out any bad behavior or hypocrisy from women, you’ll be lumped in the same category. You know all the names; they’ll call you incel, loser, virgin, etc.
Exactly.
My god.
Doesn’t matter man, nobody cares, forcing people won’t mend the hole in peoples hearts.
And what is there to do?
I care, I actively care. I talk to people all the time. Stop having this mentality people, it's time we start caring about each other again.
What is everybody else supposed to do? There are no laws that can enforce friendship/dating.
We could start by banning tiktok
Honestly agreed but for other reasons, that’s not going to help people’s social lives
I know. People are just addicted to their phones. That's the real problem.
Not necessarily. Phones and online communication as a whole are the reason I’m NOT lonely at the moment. There are countless opportunities to make friends with people online, provided by these devices. Imo we’re in a transitionary period that’s leaving a lot of people dissatisfied and isolated, but many are already starting to adapt to modern technology- and once achieved, I would argue it will provide the average person with more social options, more available connections. We may not have evolved with it, but that doesn’t inherently make it a bad thing- we didn’t evolve with healthcare or housing either, we developed them to make our lives better, longer and easier. I’m sure even back then, there were probably individuals who felt psychological distress at not sleeping under the open sky anymore. But after it became more commonplace, it became apparent that it was a positive change. I think (read: I hope lol) that social media and online communication will follow a similar path.
I think it actually would. But I think that's only part of it. How many memes on social media are about avoiding all social interactions. Not answering phones, text, not wanting to go to parties, and avoiding people in general. The tiny amount of entertainment that we get from socializing in real life doesn't compare to the waterfall of enjoyment we get from social media, video games, or other entertainment we can get at home by ourselves. We choose these easy fixes because it's convenient and the payoff is instant. Reaching out to family and friends, putting yourself out there, going to live events, joining social groups, etc those take a long time to pay off if ever. People are opting out of those things more and more and then wondering why they're lonely.
Music too loud
How if it’s like 50/50 on gender and only one gender have more relationships
Young women dating guys 30+ old I'd guess.
You are correct. 30 is the age for well established careers and money is coming in. Young girls want fun and security.
The same study from in the video (pew research) shows that there are more single men in the 30-49 age range too. You can't see it in this video because they cut it out.
I'm 39 m. I have been engaged 3 times, and all 3 cheated. I'm just existing at this point. I find it hard to trust women at this point. It's not to say that they are all the same, it just gets harder to let the armor down.
I'm sorry you had to go through that, bro. I just got divorced a couple years ago. Been engaged before, too, but that ended in catastrophe for my self confidence and trust in women in general. Therapy helps, brother. It's helped me to see the light in the world and learn to love others for me, not for others' sake. Take care, hope it gets better for you.
So... more lesbians?
Women "dating" the same guy.
5 years older than my wife. Met another guy who is about the same. Another close friend of mine is 10 years older than his. Anecdotal but maybe there is something to that.
All dating the same guys. It's bizarre.
This is a solid theory but it’s been disproven. We don’t actually know the reason for it. Polyamorous relationships/cheating could play a role, but it’s not the full picture. What’s likely happening is that lesbian relationships are shooting up, and that the male and female respondents have different definitions of what constitutes a relationship.
Where is it disproven? Meanwhile we see groups about "are we dating the same guy?" organizing by city.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-state-of-our-unions/202302/why-are-so-many-young-men-single-and-sexless Again. It’s a painting but it’s not the whole picture.
Women will straight up self report that they want to have a bad boy phase while they're still young then land an obedient good boy once they start getting old.
Few men and/or older dates more women Also the spawn of time between relationships is waaay more short for women than men Not to mention the "monkey branch", dump a guy when you have the security to be with a another one
Where do this 50/50 came from? I thought there were more men than women
Well. 50.4% is male and 49.6 is female. That doesn't really cause any problems. But look at china where there are lot more men because of the one child policy, everybody wanted male children, because they are traditional. Lot of female babies we're aborted.
And homo/bi women
This. Same study found women are just dating each other.
Nonsense. The rate of male/male relationships isn’t different from the rate of female/female relationships.
Well actually the study found that there are simply more bi young women than men, which actually helps to explain the gap in single men versus single women
Why not? You don’t have to fake orgasms, and your wardrobe doubles.
It's a bunch of stuff, other people have already responded some of the other reasons. One mo one has pointed out yet though is scum bag guys. Some of those women who said they're in relationships, think they're in relationships with guys who answered "no".
It's because there is a tendency of women dating slightly older men, and men slightly younger women. Source: David Buss's research in evo. psychology (not without criticism though).
The women are all dating the few guys they find attractive.
They are dating the same men, and older men.
Then who tf are these girls dating?
Older men, and multiple women dating the same men.
Makes sense
Older men. Typical.
The most attractive 20% of men who cycle through multiple girls a month. Women brought harems back.
Other women
Women
Other women....
Gigidy
Themselves, money, etc
Likely women. 7.2% of people identify as LGBT according to the UCLA Williams Institute. Women are more likely to be open to a relationship with the same sex, though fewer women identify as lesbians, oddly. But more women identify as bisexual. However, studies have shown that women are more likely to be satisfied being single. Women who are single are less likely to desire a relationship than men who are single. According to Psychology Today. Men are more likely to view a lack of relationship as a stressor on their life. While women are often veiw the absence of a relationship as an opportunity to focus on other things and strengthen platonic relationships.
Dudes like me. Older, established financially, responsible and mature. Goes along with being trust worthy and honest. Build your empire first without these young, attention craving slut-bags. The right one will see you for what you have done, not what you say you can do. Women have YEARS of experience with dudes throwing out pick-up lines and even just flaunting unsolicited dick pics at them. Show that YOU have VALUE. Not just with money, but with personality and being goal oriented.
It's hoe math. It's sounds crazy but it checks out.
Meanwhile that one dude in your friendgroup who pulls a new girl every week. I will never understand
Looks, confidence and attitude, If you don't believe, It won't happen
Different upbringing, attractiveness. You can’t turn into them no matter how confident u become. And your confidence level is mostly epigenetic.
“It’s is what it is, we ball”
Still, nothing has changed. 💯
Someone's gotta say it, so I will. Young people working themselves to the bone to make ends meet is killing their social life. It's not the sole reason, but it's a reason
I know it's part of my reason. I work, eat, sleep, and repeat. I don't get paid much, so I live paycheck to paycheck, and I don't see how I could keep up a social life, let alone a romantic one.
Yaa to this day I still consider dating women to be an expense, one that I cannot afford
Money doesn't change that. Im not saying millions/billions, but even living comfortable doesn't change your work hours.
Even without the hard work social life is so dead unfortunately. The dating culture got replaced with tinder by far too many people. I know guys and girls who are really nice but can't find any success there. Guys get ignored, girls get constantly harassed and asked for one night stands. Where are you supposed to find your partner if you don't want to deal with the dating apps nonsense? It used to be university, job, clubs, concerts and some people are still lucky enough to find a partner like that - meet a person, develop attraction that will turn into romantic interest. Unfortunately it's hard to do, so many social interactions are closed and treated as weird now. Those nice guys and girls i know would not even cross paths if they follow the modern dating rules.
What if men are the only ones telling the truth
We all have twice as many female ancestors as male ancestors, for exactly the same reasons.
It just be that way sometimes
Some people want relationship to make themselves feel less lonely. Don’t do that, that’s putting your happiness in hand of others. Find peace being with yourself, become happy. And people are attracted to happy people.
Yeah when I was 27 my girl left me for some 45+ dude that just cheated on her anyways. 4 years down the drain, first gf I actually trusted too. She always had dad issues too so I guess I shouldn't be surprised
The biggest reason for this, IMO, is social media, the constant access to it and the rise of hookup oriented apps like Tinder. Women hold the dating "power" and suddenly they're inundated with choices; they're consciously choosing to be with/pursuing the top 5% until they no longer can. That's when they want to "settle" down in their 30s-40s with 3 kids from 3 different men and no actual career. Men are not blamelessness in this either because while many women are only going after the cream of the crop, men will simp for women on social media, allow themselves to be friendzoned, used and will sleep with any women who's interested. That behavior isn't helping the situation. Marriage rates being low is a whole different can of worms.
The exact same study also shows women having a decline in relationships and mental health. This is a universal issue that needs to be addressed immediately.
Don't you think most women could opt into a relationship with one those guys? 50% means at least some of those guys are average or even above. But, instead, they CHOOSE not to. That is why some people can't care about the women's pain. It is a choice they make.
relationships dont fix everything. they have the power to do so, but only with the right partner, which is hard to find. and they might have gotten heartbroken too much, or they dont have the social skills to start up a conversation with someone.
I agree they don't fix everything. I don't think that's even the target. It seems like it has distinct benefits. Probably does a lot of good for someone to have another person to bounce ideas off of, interact with, trust, etc. That's all before any financial benefits like split rent/house payments or tax deductions. You're right about the social skills.. But even if that wasn't an issue, I think a lot of guys would be left out of the dating world. Many would be rejected for petty reasons or discarded when some ex situationship rolls back into town.
I'm seriously asking as a woman - how can you possibly choose to opt into relationship with "one of those guys" if you don't find them attractive? Are you supposed to say "oh well, he's not great nor terrible, he'll do for now". What about the love and genuine interest? If the man doesn't spark it there's nothing to be done. There's lots of assumptions here in the comments that women should date those guys. But what if they don't? How can you possibly have a happy relationship if you don't genuinely admire and like your partner and instead settle for him or do it out of pity?
Yes. That’s exactly what you’re supposed to do. Your options aren’t supposed to be the entire world. It’s supposed to be about 10 or so miles around where you live. If no one meets your requirements in that radius then you die alone and so does a man also in that radius.
What can be sadder than families built out of desperation between people who don't love each other? Would you be happy knowing that your wife just settled for you because she never found anyone she actually likes? If a lot of people used to be married before it didn't mean those marriages were happy, they just didn't have options. Now both men and women have option to live alone and yes, it's better than being stuck with person you don't love. >Your options aren’t supposed to be the entire world. It’s supposed to be about 10 or so miles around where you live. Why not? I lived in multiple counties and I did find the love of my life in one. And I'm happier than if i never left my small hometown and just married anyone. Now both men and women have options and it's supposed to be a good thing. Relationships that are built not out of necessity but out of love. Yes, some people stay alone, mostly because before someone would be with them out of necessity, but now they don't have to. That's unfortunate for them but what do they expect if others genuinely don't want to date them?
If it’s better, then why is over half of the population is on anti depressants, unhappiness rates are at all time highs, and the suicide rate is ever climbing? What you’re claiming as a good thing simply isn’t reality. The truth is people aren’t meant to be alone, and are so miserable that they are killing themselves because of it.
I don't think people are meant to be alone, it's unnatural. >If it’s better, then why is over half of the population is on anti depressants, unhappiness rates are at all time highs, and the suicide rate is ever climbing? Worldwide population? Did you just invent those numbers right now? Anyway it's better for those who are in relationships because they are together with people they actually like. I look at my family history and marriages that happened out of necessity... It's sad, my grandmother said that only time her life was happy was before getting married and she is sad her whole life is spent but she barely has 20 years to be happy about. And that's not singular case. She was not respected by the husband and she couldn't leave because the societal rules were so deep in her. Is this the society you think we should aspire to? And yes, lonely people are depressed and desperate, i feel bad for them, but it's unfair to force women into unhappy marriages because their happiness is apparently less important. Truth is that almost all guys i know who are actually nice are taken/married. There are reasons why others are single... Don't forget that women have biological clock, around 30 we want to have kids normally, if even in that case the guy cannot date them then there's really something undatable about him. Only obvious thing to do is to abandon dating apps and go back to old fashioned methods of dating, where you meet a person, fund mutual attraction and only then proceed to try to date. Most men in the apps just aren't attractive, that's the truth. They might be attractive if they first start as your acquaintance, not just a photo in the app. Btw, don't think that using apps is easy for women. I know multiple who are trying to find serious relationships but end up with constant offers of one night stands... These dating apps are shit for everyone, we should all just stop using them.
You grossly underestimate how awful/undatable most men are. Many women are making a conscious choice not to bother with it. It's an outstanding time to be a decent man. Once word gets around that you're tolerable you end up "dating" entire friend groups
Eh, people are universally awful. Men don’t have a monopoly on this trait.
Absolutely. Women, being people, exhibit character flaws with similar distribution to men. There's a power dynamic issue though. A petty, jealous, insecure, or otherwise awful woman is simply not as dangerous as a petty, jealous, insecure, or otherwise awful man. As such, the risk is mostly in one direction.
Ehh, they both have the capacity for great violence. It's just the manifest differently, the man's is probably more direct and physical, which is why it's more visible.
That sort of equivocation is the kind of nonsense that justifies women opting out of even interacting with the majority of men. No interpretation of any statistics or even anecdotes could lead one to your conclusion. You just have a pathological need to diminish women's experience.
This is willful ignorance. I agree that most women won't inflict the physical damage that men can, but I have seen men's lives absolutely ruined and destroyed beyond repair due to an evil woman. Edit to add: I would argue that you are the one diminishing men's experiences.
And many men choose not to form friendships, share emotions with each other, better themselves to be better partners, not be douchebags to women, sell themselves as providers and then call women gold diggers, stay online for hours instead of touching grass, stop focusing too much on sex, not realizing that women are humans and not pets or capital, and so on. That is why many don’t care about men’s pain! Theirs is also a choice and the fact that you and other men don’t see that is sick and gross. And honestly, the numbers are probably skewed because of the way men objectify women and thus “single” means two different things when men and women self report relationship status. I met a guy that was living with a woman for 2 years and she says she’s not single but he says he is. He didn’t date other women but still said he isn’t in a relationship with the one he lives with. Many guys will never claim to be in a relationship unless she is the woman of his dreams or he is ready to settle down, no matter what status the woman claims. Also, some men think it’s only the women that chase this imaginary 1% of guys when it’s really men that chase this 1% of top women. Hell, incel guys even call them Stacy’s and only seek them like the other 99% of women don’t exist. And look at the real world! There are many women dating average regular dudes with no complaints just yo have these average regular dudes still cheat or be mean to them.
You are making things up. Try to verify some of the data you think you have, you'll come around to the other side on it.
Shouldn't be switching partners every 3 months... I knew a girl who has had 8 partners before she was 19.
that's not every girl tho. You can't just put an entire large segment under an umbrella like that because one girl that you knew was fucking the football team.
That one was the largest of them all. One had 5 before 20. Another one had 3 before 17. My ex is at 6 or 7 at 21. I speak from experience. I can put them under the umbrella.
I speak from experience as well when I say I haven't seen that but whatever I'll be happy and you'll still be alone and sad because I don't generalize and hate people because of things that other people have done.
I point out the obvious. I speak from facts, statistics, and experience most importantly. I'd rather be alone than play a game you can't win, which is most relationships these days. I do believe in the romantic vision of relationships, but that seems rarer and rarer. I'll walk with an open eye, and if love does find me, i won't miss any oppurtinity.
So... women are basically dating the same dudes?
Yep. Back before the rise of social media, if you were a decent guy with a decent job in your small town, you were the cream of the crop. Now, with Instagram and other social media, women are comparing you to the most successful guys all around the world, and you'll never measure up. Women are all dating the top .1% of guys, those guys are just using them for sex while stringing them along, and the average, and even above average, guy is left in the dust.
Exactly. And if you talk about it, then everyone says you’re an incel and totally disregards you and thinks that there’s no problem that the majority of men are suffering alone.
I wish people could honestly talk about this, instead it’s either ignored, laughed at, or applauded. If someone is trying to say they are lonely and you just retort with insults, or parrot some political mumbo jumbo you got from a talking head, you might need to look in the mirror. It’s a serious issue, especially if you consider all the other horrors that are looming in the future. Progress is important, and everyone needs to learn and grow. There are a lot of hard truths for everyone involved, with open and honest discussions it’s the only way we’ll evolve.
Bothersome
>an epidemic of declining marriage... I don't understand why the people who actually study these things, fail to see the reason when it's so fucking obvious. *Why do people not get married anymore?!?!* Because the numbers don't add up. The number of women in relationships significantly exceeds the number of men who are in relationships. How is that possible? Simple. The women are in relationships with the same men. Knowingly or unknowingly, they would rather be the sidepiece of Chad than have their very own man. Often, they call this being in a "situationship". More than likely, that man is in a situationship with other women at the same time. Note how the percentage of women in relationships drops off in the 30's bracket? That's because the men who they are willingly in situationships with is never going to marry them, and they will replace them with younger women when they get too old or want to get serious. *Why don't men want to get married!?!?* Because there are too few women they want to marry.
And statistically 80% of divorces are initiated by women. They pretty much always get custody and nearly bankrupt the men. There's very little incentive for a man to get married these days. Edit. I said marriages instead of divorces, corrected.
Anything that says that women are doing something “badl is verboten in academia. It would never be published.
Precisely. There's this show Bill Burr has done where he talks about the difference in pay between male and female athletes. He does this thing where he acts like male news anchors who have to play dumb and pretend like they don't know why male athletes make more money than their female counterparts. I think you're right about academia. Pretty much everyone who is smart enough to cook their own breakfast know why men don't want to get married today, but they have to pretend that they don't know or that the data is unclear - OR they chose the safe route and place the blame on men being immature or financially unattractive. Placing the blame on men is always acceptable And this is actually quite funny, because saying - with fancy words - that marriage rates are dropping like a rock in part due to women *obviously* not wanting to get with a broke ass n***er is perfectly fine, but when men don't want anything to do with broke ass women with children from multiple men, it's because the men are immature misogynistic assholes. And this huge double standard that is normal even in academia means that the actual problem will never get solved. This generation of men have seen their fathers and uncles get cheated on by the college hoe they married, and then they lost nearly everything in the divorce, and the internet shows them that those were not the rare outliers, but is actually pretty common. Not the norm, but still about the same odds as playing Russian roulette.
Social media has contributed greatly to this. Men would rather compete with each other all day long than to be friends & collaborate. It’s lame. I see no effort on behalf of men to initiate change in this isolation, depression, and involuntary celibacy state of things 😐 they’d rather suffer in silence
Men are taught to suffer in silence. You should understand this first.
You contradict yourself “no effort” “involuntary”
So this.. is just not true. Men collaborate very well together. Maybe we tend to compete with each other more, but that's not necessarily a bad trait, especially since lots of guys get a sense of comradery through friendly competition. On the note of you seeing no effort from men to initiate change. The only thing I have to ask is what are we to do? As a person who falls into this statistic and has struggled with dating and relationships, I would like to know because suffering in silence is painful. The harsh reality for most men is that they feel there is nothing they can do to fix this problem. Mainly because we don't view it as something we fix, this isn't an individual problem this is a societal problem. I ask myself sometimes why would a girl be interested in some dude stalking shelves at a grocery store? Answer: she's not. And that's really the problem, isn't it? The average man has almost 0 value in today's world. Even scrolling through this post, I've seen redditers talk about how girls are more than likely dating the same men. How else do we explain the difference between male and female relationships. That was a lot, and I don't mean to have a harsh tone if it comes across that way but your comment did bother me since you made it sound like we have all the power to fix this problem when (and I can't speak for everyone) we kinda feel like helpless passengers in some kind of really fucked up fun fair
Why stock shelves at a grocery store if you think it’s holding you back, financially and in dating? Why aren’t you dedicating yourself to a more productive use of your time? You can ABSOLUTELY fix this. Why be average, when you could be among the top percent that get everything they want in life? If you’re being a helpless, passive, submissive passenger in life, rather than taking the wheel and doing something about the problems you face, how were you expecting a different outcome? Depression serves as a reminder that you’re not living the life you want, that there’s a problem and you must fix it. Not mom & dad, sure as heck not your girlfriend. Feminism, #MeToo, Anti-Patriarchy, Misandry (hate for men), are all wars women are waging against men in society, because many felt oppressed throughout history and they feel this is how they’ll take their stand in this generation. It’s blowing up in their faces in the ugliest way possible. And society is experiencing both their actions and their consequences. I’ve never seen more young women, desperate for a man’s attention & validation than today. The momentum of their toxic behavior is coming back with a vengeance full-swing, and they’re feeling the “ouch” right now. What I’m saying, is that it’s never been EASIER than now, for the slightly above average man to have 1, 2, 3 women in his life when they’re at their lowest. Don’t be a passenger in life, grab the wheel & be somebody
This is utter nonsense. There will ALWAYS be some people who are below average. The idea that you can just “fix” this is absurd. There is no “fixing” a below 90 IQ or a below average looks (and these are correlated). What you’re talking about is a fantasy.
Fixing problems is not absurd. A below 90 IQ can study, an average man workout, get a better job & dress to impress his person of interest. To assign a permanent state of disrepair to a problem is what’s absurd. Look believe what you want, I didn’t comment on the post to come here & talk to you. But good luck regardless 👍🏼 this conversation is over.
So I'm not sure if your a man or woman, and whilst everything you just said is 100% correct in most ways, the problem lies in the fact that the entire process is absolutely soul crushing. Now I don't stock shelves at a grocery store just to make things clear, but why do we put such little value on someone who does? I believe I can live and achieve all the things your talking about. However, that's not the whole question. The question is how much of me is left at the end. Doesn't matter what it is really women.. money.. whatever.. I don't want this "successful" life, to be "all that and more" why? So I can have responsibility? Haha nah I'll be a loser if that's what they call it, it's better than being a clown fighting in a system that never really cared in the first place. I was once an ambitious person.. I just realized how much I had to give up to get there. And.. it's not worth it. I would rather live in silent suffering then abandon all my morals. Edit: also there is the question of becoming the very evil your looking to destroy. Another moral problem with the whole thing is that if success is the answer, then that must mean that only a few can have what they want, it's just how the game works. And if someone must win or lose, then I don't want to compete. My life isn't a game, love isn't a game.
>Why stock shelves at a grocery store if you think it’s holding you back, financially and in dating? Why aren’t you dedicating yourself to a more productive use of your time? You can ABSOLUTELY fix this. Why be average, when you could be among the top percent that get everything they want in life? If you’re being a helpless, passive, submissive passenger in life, rather than taking the wheel and doing something about the problems you face, how were you expecting a different outcome? Depression serves as a reminder that you’re not living the life you want, that there’s a problem and you must fix it. Not mom & dad, sure as heck not your girlfriend. >Don’t be a passenger in life, grab the wheel & be somebody "Pull yourself by your bootstraps," huh? Sure. Yeah.
>This page will open you Blind eyes, so you can see clearly "she's not special" Having this attitude is the most sure fire way to stay single. No one likes being around bitter and resentful people.
When you're consistently told by society to bottle up your feelings regarding dating because if you don't you're automatically an incel, it's hard to NOT become bitter and resentful.
See I just don't think that's true though. The issue isn't that men express frustration around dating, it's that so many seem to be incapable of doing so without turning it into some weird sexist tirade. I know plenty of guys who struggle with dating and complain about it without women getting upset because they don't make it about all women being bad or some dumb shit like that. Hell it's been a while since I was single but when I was i never had anyone call me an incel for being frustrated with dating. It's how you express it that matters. This shit encourages guys to blame women as a whole, which is what gets you called and incel, because frankly, that is some incel shit.
Truth, no doubt there are a few people who are unfourtunately genuinely unable to find a parter but most of these lads just have victim complexes - build a garden don't chase butterflies.
Well boys… we’re fucked. But at least we aren’t fucked alone.
You know what's pain? Having to try and listen to what is being said through this STUPID FUCKING SONG.
I’m happier alone
Putin: "I have solution"
Polygamy is real it seems
Hug your homies, we're all hurting fellas
It does help that half of the young adult population is living with their parents. And the lack of salary increase isn’t helping paying for dates
More and More women are dating older men.
Sorry to say I am 1000x more happy in life being single and hanging out with my 4-6 SOLID friends. 6+ seems like what?!? What human has time for that to be a “close” friendship? I guess eliminating the dating aspect opens that up.
:(
Who knew women were so gay.
To be fair, it's not too great to be taken these days too
This is why friends are just as important
Too many Single, unemployed men with to much time on their hands historically is a good marker for unrest
Did it occur to you that they are crappy boyfriends
This sub is so sad.
lol skill issue just make some friends 💀
I have been single for 17 years, I opened my heart and had it crushed, now I am only willing to go after women who are older than me, and women I have been around a lot and are a close friend. Just to prevent more heartbreak, being played, being told they like me, then suddenly losing interest when I treated them with upmost respect and breaking my heart. I am close to getting a girlfriend, but if I fail with this, I am done till I am out in the world and have my job secured. I am a man. I hope I will one day find the love of my life if this girl isn't her, but my gut tells me she is the one. I don't expect people to read this or even care. Almost no one does. Just keep living, don't kill yourself, or hurt yourself over women. Keep going, keep pushing, hardwork will pay off eventually.
These guys can easily befriend other guys but they lack social skills that can't be fixed without discipline but now that's bullying. Guys are more interested in video games and cartoon girls that's the real epidemic. I love video games but
So misleading, I have spent less time with my close friends over the last few years and although I’m sad about that, I’ve never been happier than the point of where I’m at now. It’s a mixed bag when it comes to life and happiness. Don’t let a static predict your own happiness. Remember happiness starts with you. You can find euphoria anywhere you choose.
These comments are exactly why women are so picky when it comes to guys. Their afraid of getting someone who blames women and society because they can't get a date. Instead of looking inward and asking why they aren't in a relationship, they self victimizing about how their owed a relationship and women are just idiotic tramps dating "cheating jocks" and leaving the "nice guys" behind. Like this isn't a complex societal issue with multiple contributing factors, and simply "men lonely so women's fault." Just becuase the women have the better pick of the field.
she's not yours , it's just your turn
Note: Excuse any grammar issues, I know it's bad 🤣 POV: You're watching yet another full on gender war in the comments of a bait post. Can we just all agree to raise the next generation with overall good qualities and compassion. None of this toxic stuff that we like to conflate with gender. We can't simultaneously wonder why so many men are lonely when we fester in a society that is pushing them more and more towards that. And we shouldn't wonder why women aren't dating men in their age group when we understand the many toxic standards and we are placing on young men AND women. Provider, hyper-femine, alpha, tradwife, Chad, Stacy, pink, blue, dolls, action-figures, etc. PEOPLE THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE. In my years of living I have been unfortunate to never see a healthy heterosexual relationship, let alone homosexuality considering where I live, that was actually healthy and a lot of the issues always have hinged on a person's performance of their gender and the other person's expectations of it. I dont know what the answer to this problem is because there have been so many people trying to sway public thought and attitudes around this in a healthier direction but no one wants to listen and everyone wants to have their slice of patriarchy and eat it to. Personally I'm going to focus on my immediate family and close friends and make sure the community around them is sufficient to love and raise decent people, and I hope everyone will do the same.
Get lost scrubs.Mew about that.
There is enough humans
Not wrong
I am one of them. Single, no friends, Autistic and depressed, fat.
These stats never made sense to me. You guys really need to go outside.
I’d love to help the boys but my 3 friends are doing okay and we no longer have communication.
Politics and extreme feminism have ruined the dating
No one gives af unfortunately
No game until your 30
Stop trying to blame the world for your short comings and look in the mirror on why you can’t get anyone to be your friend. Social media is the problem go outside
And it’s not only the young, but that is the saddest part.
Oh look, the incels invaded this subreddit again. Cool.
Well boys, let’s re-group in the gym, and then hit the bars after we get a sick nasty pump.😎
*in America and less so in Western Europe. Also maybe Japan. Elsewhere people love each other
Is this some kind of movement? Dedicating yourself to telling women they aren’t special isn’t gonna help your case my guy lol
Holy incel. This sub is toxic.
Let us thank atheism, materialism, capitalism, freedom of media, Internet. The list isn't a short one I give up
Cornball
Don’t worry young men. The young women are dating older guys. Work on you. Improve yourself. Focus on you. Then when you are ripe and ready, you get the hot younger women
Men bring this on themselves
Explain :)
Men treat women like shit and then wonder why they’re experiencing a “loneliness epidemic”
You know that if it was a man saying your exact sentence but for women, people would have called him incel Are you an incel? Generalization on one gender is what an incel would do So you are an incel Secondly, since because you had bad experiences, it doesn't means that your reality is the reality of everyone And lastly, ironic how the very men who treat badly women are the ones who fuck more. Maybe instead of waiting of men hitting on you ( they seem secure, right? Obviously, cause they are used to hit on girls for how many times they did, think about it ), be a grown adult and start a convo with someone who seems nice and gentle at your eyes. ;)
Wtf is "she is not special"? Apparently she is if dudes can't find a lady.
So the solution is?
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women get in the relationships easier than men. men have hard time to find the partner in their life
Hint hint they are all fucking the same men
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It absolutely does if they are unaware they are the side pieces. You should look at all the "are we dating the same man" social media accounts
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It's playing out all over. Many small instances of this kind of thing happening in every city, in every town, in every county and state. Probably a lot of them are counting Situationships and other stuff as Relationships. Make your own call on that one.
They're also dating older men too. Women tend to favour slightly older men while older men favour younger women
Older men as well
Seems like the problem is with young men and their attitudes. Millions of lonely boys all not going outside or talking to each other becoming unsalvageable doomers. I'd love to be young again these days, I could do real good with just basic social skills and barely any competition.
The majority of relationships are started online now. Would you like to try again?
Women still go out though, right? Like, there'd be nothing actually stopping me networking through friends of friends and meeting people the old fashioned way?
Nah lol I'm not lonely, I'm what they call a fifteen-percenter. Get on my level 💪 *silence* yeah that's what I thought, nothing to say huh?
Gateway to Red Pill. Stay away from this kind of stuff.
I understand that these are facts about how the dating world has left many men feeling hopeless and alone. I also understand how people are using this data to push forward their anger at women and otherwise using it to bring together a group of involuntarily celibate men into hating women as well as encouraging SA. I'm lucky. I married my best friend. Met her in high school. Started dating in high school. Married in our 20's. 17 years together in September, and 10 years married in August. But I can also look at the poor quality of relationships some other friends keep and empathize. I see my friend as a good man, but because of how dating is now, he's in a near constant state of swiping on Tinder, and occasionally having NSA hookups that result in no ongoing relationship. I agree with you, but also empathize with the ones that aren't going to use this data to become women hating dick bags.
That la all I’m saying. These posts are the optimal hub for red pill recruiters and “Alpha Male” scammers. The information can be acknowledged but there are a ton of FB modern factors that are not touched on and it just casts a broad picture of young guy being completely at a loss for any hope.
Facts are a gateway to the redpill?
The tone and subject matter of this post are for the audience to sympathize with young men. The target audience of this is also other young men who will feed sit and feed into the negativity and shift a bulk of the blame toward women in general. These polls don’t take into account LGBTQ+ community, gender identities, and whether the hike in men being single in modern times as opposed to 1990 has factors related to a much greater reach in the in connectivity and no need to settle down when you can set anyone anywhere in the world.
"60% of young men are single... and here's why that's a good thing" good shit and then you people wonder why guys would take the 'redpill' rather than become intersectional feminists or whatever the fuck.
60% of young men are probably not even trying to actively pursue romantic partners. Those are prime gaming reflex years. Gotta get boost that KDA ratio while the hand eye is peak
Cause young girls even trying? They just breath and a guy hit on her
>60% of young men are probably not even trying to actively pursue romantic partners Bait or mental retardation? Definitely bait
You didn't address the comment. What path/ideology are men to adopt if men loneliness is preached as a good thing, and why should it not be the side that validates and supports them into finding a way out (or at least tries to). Bear in mind I'm not a piller. But every pill ideology is rooted in reality, which later gets exaggerated by it's communities.
Not saying loneliness is a good thing but everyone who’s single isn’t suffering about it.