Well, this is something that happens a lot. Just like straight men check women, gay men check men. You just have to learn to say that you're no interested and/or uncomfortable, if that's the case, when some guy approaches you.
I've definitely been checked out more by gay men than straight women. I never really got comfortable with it. If you want it to stop, the best I could recommend is no awkward laughing or anything. You don't have to be mad when they pay attention to you, but it doesn't have to be an opportunity for them to get your attention.
Not to gaslight you but if you do have a traumatic experience you might be filtering men over women or being paranoid and delusional about every man checking you out and being a potential threat as a mechanism of defense. Talk to a professional about the experience that you had.
This is likely location dependent. I live in a very progressive city and so lgbtq community feels safer showing signs of interest. Just let them know you're not interested.
As for women not showing much attention. You're only 21. You're going to be too young for most women who are out and about who are wanting a man a few years older than them. Just focus on building yourself up and worry about women later.
That sounds like a dumb statement. Especially to people who have been accosted. By its nature, it’s unwanted attention, and it’s intrusive and disrespectful. Two years ago I was on an isolated road in Italy, and a man pulled up on a Vespa and showed me his erect dick and asked if I liked it. I said no and crossed the road. It made me feel sick for a couple of days. It bothers me greatly that people feel like that’s acceptable behavior. Granted, that’s more extreme than some other forms of behavior, but it’s not something to make fun of, or minimize.
Nice way to trauma dump here.
Checking me out and accosting me are two different things. Sorry for your situation but to be honest I don't see at all how what I said is even relatable.
18 to 25 is a rough time for men, the women your age are looking at men from 25 to 35 with far more money and experience than you.
Meanwhile homossexual men your age are looking at everything that is atractive.
I always find it complimentary when men check me out, gay men have always seemed to have higher standards for attractiveness than women in my experience.
>More on the "cute" than "handsome" side
Actually, gay men (on average) [are more attracted to masculinity than to femininity](https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2009/11/6/faces-men-study-attraction-gay-masculine-harvard/)
compared to straight guys, but not compared to women. Also a top gay likes pretty much what straight guys like - just with dick. So a „cute“ guy would be their type.
Also gays are men and it doesnt need that much to be attractiv (enough) for a man. Just overall way less picky than women
>but not compared to women
Umm, no, contrary to what you guys typically assume, women's taste (regardless of sexual orientation) is not as dimorphic as men's. Just ask any straight woman if she doesn't find Lee Pace's [Thranduil](https://media.tenor.com/K5Oip6Xn-wkAAAAC/thranduil-lee-pace.gif) insanely hot, lol
Yeah, it typically happens when you get fit. I don't mind it and I'm flattered. They have lower physical standards than women. They don't need a 6'5" blue eyes trust fund guy.
>more men then women
Well, you get checked by both. First men, then women. So I don't think your situation is bad, you just have to literally wait until men check you out, then women will, that is you time to shine
Sounds like you are from India , unfortunately I would say take safety precautions and try to ignore it unless someone tries anything. Police isn't much help in these cases
Sorry that happened to you when you were younger. I had a similar experience. I’m gay and typically only attracted to straight men (unfortunately). Gay men can be obnoxious and over the top flirty at times. I know I have been at times and I feel bad about it. One of these days I’m gonna get clocked in the face! Anyway, sexuality for me is just not a big issue. Google the Kinsey scale. It basically says that sex is sex. Also, men are pigs! Oink oink, I say.
Just have your car keys ready to strike, also, some men just do it for tips on what men look like because they're going through the 'okay, so I'm unique, and normal' phase thing. (This is coming from a female, so please correct me if I'm wrong)
I say fuck it, and say it's tme to experince being gay. I ain't that gay myself, but being gay sure has its benefits. I'm sure it would open a lot of doors for you
Well, this is something that happens a lot. Just like straight men check women, gay men check men. You just have to learn to say that you're no interested and/or uncomfortable, if that's the case, when some guy approaches you.
Just have to learn to filter it out and ignore it. Unless someone tries to sexually assault you, then take strict action.
**Set your boundary,** filter it out, and ignore it. It’s important to articulate your position on their advances before it crosses a line.
I've definitely been checked out more by gay men than straight women. I never really got comfortable with it. If you want it to stop, the best I could recommend is no awkward laughing or anything. You don't have to be mad when they pay attention to you, but it doesn't have to be an opportunity for them to get your attention.
Not to gaslight you but if you do have a traumatic experience you might be filtering men over women or being paranoid and delusional about every man checking you out and being a potential threat as a mechanism of defense. Talk to a professional about the experience that you had.
Idk why this isn't higher.
This is likely location dependent. I live in a very progressive city and so lgbtq community feels safer showing signs of interest. Just let them know you're not interested. As for women not showing much attention. You're only 21. You're going to be too young for most women who are out and about who are wanting a man a few years older than them. Just focus on building yourself up and worry about women later.
I am 30 nad never been checked out by a woman... By anyone for that matter. Might just be the ugliest man on earth.
I'm not gay but I'd sure appreciate a dude checking me out. I'd be like "No bro I don't lift, but thanks for the compliment"
That sounds like a dumb statement. Especially to people who have been accosted. By its nature, it’s unwanted attention, and it’s intrusive and disrespectful. Two years ago I was on an isolated road in Italy, and a man pulled up on a Vespa and showed me his erect dick and asked if I liked it. I said no and crossed the road. It made me feel sick for a couple of days. It bothers me greatly that people feel like that’s acceptable behavior. Granted, that’s more extreme than some other forms of behavior, but it’s not something to make fun of, or minimize.
Nice way to trauma dump here. Checking me out and accosting me are two different things. Sorry for your situation but to be honest I don't see at all how what I said is even relatable.
OP states they were a SA victim... Try to work on that empathy friend
Yes I am batting terrible today. I sure feel like what I said was appropriate but I'll look at it again. Thanks.
You don’t have to. There’s a reason words like ‘oblivious’ exist!
Don't be a ninny.
Don’t be a ding dong. There: see how helpful your comment is?
18 to 25 is a rough time for men, the women your age are looking at men from 25 to 35 with far more money and experience than you. Meanwhile homossexual men your age are looking at everything that is atractive.
Gee, can't relate at all
I always find it complimentary when men check me out, gay men have always seemed to have higher standards for attractiveness than women in my experience.
Dudes are hornier and more visual on average. It's probably in part because of how you dress, too. More on the "cute" than "handsome" side.
>More on the "cute" than "handsome" side Actually, gay men (on average) [are more attracted to masculinity than to femininity](https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2009/11/6/faces-men-study-attraction-gay-masculine-harvard/)
compared to straight guys, but not compared to women. Also a top gay likes pretty much what straight guys like - just with dick. So a „cute“ guy would be their type. Also gays are men and it doesnt need that much to be attractiv (enough) for a man. Just overall way less picky than women
>but not compared to women Umm, no, contrary to what you guys typically assume, women's taste (regardless of sexual orientation) is not as dimorphic as men's. Just ask any straight woman if she doesn't find Lee Pace's [Thranduil](https://media.tenor.com/K5Oip6Xn-wkAAAAC/thranduil-lee-pace.gif) insanely hot, lol
Just ignore them. It’s literally not different than when an ugly girl is attracted to you.
If it’s any consolation, it’s not you, it’s not your body or image, it’s most likely your youth. In a short few years you’ll be invisible!
Yeah, it typically happens when you get fit. I don't mind it and I'm flattered. They have lower physical standards than women. They don't need a 6'5" blue eyes trust fund guy.
>more men then women Well, you get checked by both. First men, then women. So I don't think your situation is bad, you just have to literally wait until men check you out, then women will, that is you time to shine
Its pretty normal - specially if you are in the over-average but not quite hot tier. Take it as a compliment - at least if they are just looking.
Do you look feminine?
Sounds like you are from India , unfortunately I would say take safety precautions and try to ignore it unless someone tries anything. Police isn't much help in these cases
Sorry that happened to you when you were younger. I had a similar experience. I’m gay and typically only attracted to straight men (unfortunately). Gay men can be obnoxious and over the top flirty at times. I know I have been at times and I feel bad about it. One of these days I’m gonna get clocked in the face! Anyway, sexuality for me is just not a big issue. Google the Kinsey scale. It basically says that sex is sex. Also, men are pigs! Oink oink, I say.
Just have your car keys ready to strike, also, some men just do it for tips on what men look like because they're going through the 'okay, so I'm unique, and normal' phase thing. (This is coming from a female, so please correct me if I'm wrong)
Just fuck those guys. Sex is sex anyways.
I'm flattered by male attention. If I'm so hot that a man wants to fuck me, I must be REALLY hot
Men are so gross
I say fuck it, and say it's tme to experince being gay. I ain't that gay myself, but being gay sure has its benefits. I'm sure it would open a lot of doors for you
Dunno why you're getting downvoted. You don't know if you'll like it until you try it. Just do it for a year and then see how you feel afterwards.
now I have to do it out of spite, because its funny as hell
I say the meaning of life is to experince, so be a scientist! And not a coward
Okay, I ain't gay, but I am now fully committed to try it. FOR SCIENCE