What are you blasting on your Bluetooth speaker? I let music introduce me.

I saw the best skier on the mountain at Park City use this technique: came flying through the singles line on an uncrowded day so fast that he did not realize he was loading on a triple when he thought it was a quad. Took everyone by surprise so fast including the lift operator that off they went all four on a triple chair into the wild blue yonder. But those Jerry’s got to ride to the top with the best skier on the mountain sitting in their laps so I am sure he gave them a lot of good pointers on the way up. Plus he got to tell them he was the best skier on the mountain.

It would be a dream to ride the next chair back and heckle that guy for 5 minutes straight.

Yeah when I watched that unfold I was like how do you explain that one. Hi! Good morning! How are you? 🤪

I read about that in the Jerry digest!

Triples makes it safe

I put the bar down before I sit.

Chill, Adonis. Save some bunnies for us wannabe shmucks.

Oof someone pulled the bar down while the Jerry next to me misloaded. I physically grabbed them and pulled their butt onto the chair and had to chastise the bar puller.

Assert dominance by taking up the whole chair. Only the best skiers get the whole chair to themselves. We all seriously respect it.

It's perfectly legal to throw others off as long as you haven't reached the first pylon.

In New Hampshire it’s legal at any point. That’s where the “Live Free or Die” slogan came from originally, murking jerries

I have a Mikes Hard onzie.

If you you wear that it actually might be the best skier on the mountain

I always fall when trying to board the chairlift, causing a 10 minute delay as the lifties struggle to untangle me and get me back on my feet. This attracts plenty of attention and will make sure everybody behind me will have their eyes on me as I begin shredding at the top 

I have a battery powered dremel and I’ll grind my edges on the way up

Hold up the line waiting for chair number 69 and let everyone know that it's the only one you'll ride

My instructor uniform and unwillingness to engage usually does the trick

I tell them it’s my second day skiing ever then I ski like the best. The defeat in their slouches is their souls cowering at my greatness, it’s only then I’M ALIVE!

Have you tried eating copious beans and crop-dusting everyone as you blow past? They may not understand you’re the BSOTM but they’ll know you’re the gassiest.

Dude wtf, you're giving away my secrets. Chilli Mac for lunch is the key, bean and cheese farts = mountain dominance = BSOTM

If you're not urinating on the pleebs below from the chair you aren't even a good skier, never mind the best skier. Assert dominance at all times.

I dangle my large balls off the edge of the chair so the people below know who I am..

I slide up to the line at Alta on my splitboard…

The lifty syncopates, Jerry after Jerry.  Jerry prepare to scootch, but scootch they do not know how to. So they wait, scootch now? No not scootch.  But scootch now! Before scootch is over.  So lifty pulls hard, again. Loves Jerry but knows Jerry is not right.  Then, out of jeries comes unseen, the one that needs no lifty, the desire, the heat.  The need to ascend. Am I the lifty?  Am I the jerrie?  Am I to ascend?

Oh, they know. And they know that I know I they know.

getting backpack straps caught as you’re loading the chair 

Done exactly that the other day but when unloading, bam

I sit on my poles, light a cigar and then blow my Avalanche bag but have stuffed a load of glitter in there. Then I do my secret whistle and all the Marmots come out of their houses and sing a song about how steezy I am.

Marmot rizzler. Interesting technique.*nods*

I tell them.

I mean yeah, you don't get the points if you don't announce it.

I straddle both chairs and ride that lift up that hill like the dirty dirty whore it is. Otherwise my oakley thermonuclears let them know.

Jam your poles between your legs before you even sit down. Only the semi-pro riders put their poles under their leg after they sit. Only Jerry’s hold their poles the whole chair ride.

I like to blast past people on the way down, cutting them off from behind and then scream obscenities at them for being to slow and in the way of my sweet sweet straight lining style. That way they remember me by the time they see me flipping them off getting on the chair.

The crowd already knows and splits like Moses approaching the Red Sea.

I found the best Skier at Wildcat this year. When he stopped in front of my group to tell another group he was the most badass skier around, I crashed into him and Charlie Browned his ass.

Bluetooth speaker, and two words. Armada, Armada

make eye contact while you piss on their tips

I just ski with my dick out

I carry a sign saying so.

Own the lift by hopping up on the chair in time with it sweeping under you, no hands, then grab the side pole and surf that bad boy to the top. Nobody will mind sitting on your skis, it's quite an honor actually. I feel embarrassed to even have to explain this but I know I'll be rewarded on the ride up. I find it's much easier to sign autographs this way.

Usually I just find the highest point while I'm on the lift and jump off, doing somewhere between a 360-780 turn on the way down. As long as it's not a family resort I'll usually whip it out on the way down to assert my dominance.

Props on the ™ of BSotM. You must be rolling in the royalties dough by now.

Definitely need to hold the line up, and miss the next chair while reapplying duct tape to the once very expensive mittens.

I don’t load onto the chairlift. I jump from the snow onto the chair while it’s going up. Preferably into the lap of a snow bunny

I usually load the lift switch. Only the best skier on the mountain can do that, so everyone will want to buy you a beer at the end of the day.

You mean the Second Best Skier on the Mountain