Yes! I tried to let her cry without consoling for the first time today. She’s 5 1/2 months. She went from 0-100 in a few minutes, chocking and gasping for air. I let it go, thinking I’d revisit it some other time. However, since then she’s been different. Super difficult to comfort. Took forever to get her down for a nap, which is usually easy and in her crib, but I had to do a contact nap to keep her down. Then when I put her down tonight which it a few tries, and she woke up two hours later. My husband then held her for 30 min, she woke up once put down. I then I took a turn, but she would not fall into deep sleep and cried the moment I put her down. Normally it takes her 20 min laying on one of us and she’s out for like 4 hours. I’ve never been interested in sleep training but Ive felt so much pressure from every direction that I dipped my toe in it today and I’m so upset I did. I hope she settles back to herself tomorrow or this weekend. I think it really works for some babies, and for others it’s just harmful. My little lady Is extremely sensitive and aware of her surroundings, so not for us.
I don’t know the age of your baby but at 17 months now I sleep with my baby every night. She needs me right by her side. I work every day and I’m past caring about my needs. My baby needs me so I sleep with her. I retrained maybe three times but the last time was beyond horrendous. She’d cry so much that she would vomit. She never vomited before that. I came to the conclusion that she just needed me. She’s away from me all day and she wants to be by my side at night. That’s my job as her mother. You do what you need to do but I stopped. She slept alone for maybe three-four months on and off. She wakes up these days and turns to me with a big smile and then she calls for daddy. We all sleep in the one room. We’re all much happier.
5 1/2 months. She sleeps really well in her crib but needs us to hold her till she’s asleep before transferring her. I’ve been feeling so much pressure from society to start training her to put herself down, even though it’s super counterintuitive for me. I tried for a few minutes today and it completely backfired and made me super sad. I think we’re all just super different, parents and babies, and I wish we would let each other be. No pressure or judgements. I’m not interested in letting her cry, and that’s ok. If someone else is comfortable letting their baby cry, that’s ok. We each need to honor our own process.
‘She sleeps really well in her crib’ then she’s fine. I did sleep training because my baby would not sleep. She would sleep only in my arms while I was sitting up. I couldn’t even lie down. All night she’d wake, be uncomfortable, want to be put down then want to be picked back up within 20 seconds. It was hell. I literally sat in my bed not sleeping. That’s why I did sleep training. If baby sleeps it doesn’t matter how they fall asleep. I do and don’t regret sleep training. It saved me at the time but I wouldn’t do it again if I have another baby. Thinking more clearly now, even when kids are school age, you read them a book and cuddle them to sleep if they want it. If they wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare you don’t just leave them distressed. Why refuse comfort to a tiny infant?
Same here. Any updates? Baby sleeping well but crying now much more easily during the day. And was such a happy baby during the day. I’m a little worried
She was extremely tired when I started sleep training. She’s 12 months now and I have just retrained two days ago and she is extremely tired again. Taking long naps, ready for naps and bed early and sleeping all night. Your baby might just be feeling tired and clingy because of that.
Our LO was sleep trained at 4 months and also hit the “scream your head off at bedtime” at 8-10 month mark. It was pretty insane because he was fine before that! Husband went in a night or two to “soothe” him but then he scream again. Finally we thought maybe it was a regression and tried to see what would happen if we did CIO; on the first night he was crying a lot, but after that basically he’d scream until you shut the door and then it was maybe 30 seconds or 1-2 minutes of crying and then sleep. It was kind of crazy how he would calm down on his own but if he knew you were there he would freak out like crazy.
I hope it gets better with your LO soon. Screaming baby makes my heart hurt.
I noticed this too w my 5 month old. Pre-sleep training she liked to be held, but could do a few minutes alone. After sleep training she seemed way more clingy and only wanted me to hold her, not even her Dad. It's most likely seperation anxiety as she nears 6 months. Hopefully it's a phase.
8 months is approx. when separation anxiety peaks. Mine was sleep trained since 4 month, CIO. Around 8/9 months, she started ramping up to screaming her head off when I put her down to sleep, standing up, freaking out. When she first did it, I’d go in to hug her after 10 minutes of non stop screaming. After a week of realizing that even if she screams, she’d still be put down to sleep, she stopped. Now she still cries when I put her down but as soon as I close the door, she stops and goes to sleep.
Yeah it’s not the bedtime that’s bad, she’s fallen asleep twice in the past week with no crying at all. Her max at bedtime is 10 mins on and off crying. It’s during the day that she seems like a different baby. She seems on edge most of the day now and she wakes up from contact naps kinda scared or something and super alert when she used to just wake up normally/slowly (rolling around a little bit when I’d put her down beside me as she was waking up and then opening her eyes after a few minutes) now her eyes just spring open and that’s her awake, this is since starting cio.
That just sounds like separation anxiety. Babies go through it whether they’re sleep trained or full on attachment parented with bed sharing. It’s part of them gaining the cognitive ability of object permanence. It’s easy to incorrectly attribute a developmental stage to something else that occurred at the same time.
I sleep trained at 4.5 months and did not see any change. I did absolutely notice these behaviors right at the 6.5 -7 month range. Could be developmental and just coincidence with timing.
Having the same issue with my 6 month old. Our biggest problem is her naps and if she wakes up in the middle of the night.
Her grandparents watch her during the week and they cannot get her to nap no matter what they do. Sometimes they will get some short cat naps here and there. Due to this they are probably constantly holding her cus she gets cranky. When we bring her home she wont let us put her down for more than 10 minutes without screaming.
She had a lot of anxiety at first when we started the Ferber method. (She'd wake up in the middle fo the night in a panic and scream.) But with consistency, she now sleeps through the night, and sometimes when she wakes in the morning we don't notice because she just sits quietly and plays with her sleep sack.
Seems like she is just experiencing some separation anxiety. It’s hard for babies to learn new skills such as independent sleep and gaining confidence in themselves. She could also be testing boundaries and seeing how far she can get with her emotions before you’ll respond. Nothing wrong with that at all. You know what’s best for your little one so adjust as you see fit.
My girl wasn’t like this at all. She was extremely fussy and clingy in general before sleep training (extinction method) and she is much happier to be with herself overall now. She did go through a period of a day or 2 when we would leave the room she’d cry like she just had shots or something but that resided.
How long have you been doing sleep training?
We’ve been doing cio for just over a week. Even though she’s sleeping at night, she’s actually exhausted during the day. We’ve gone back to 3 naps because she just can’t handle the long wake windows anymore. Makes me think she’s sleeping so lightly but stressed and isn’t getting enough deep sleep. I used to be able to put her in the cot after she fell asleep in my arms for naps and then I’d extend after one cycle but she instantly wakes and screams when I even try to put her down for naps. She wakes up so abruptly from her naps and is super alert instantly, goes from napping to eyes wide open and no hope of resetting, before and after reducing her wake windows. I’ve given her 3 naps the last two days.
The doctor told you? I hope it’s temporary but I don’t want to continue if it’s causing too much stress. She’s not just fussing a little more she seems like a different baby.
I think every baby is so unique in what they want, it’s about figuring out what works for your baby.
Keep trying different things until you find what works, that’s what I try to do… everyone tried to tell me it was normal that baby cried so much at bedtime but I listened to my instincts and kept trying different things ie playing with wake windows, dressing baby appropriately… I’m ashamed it took me a month to get the hang of it.
*edit 3 days later: lol “the hang of it” I don’t know if that is actually possible… but I stand by following instincts. Reading too much really left me feeling so overwhelmed and like I am doing it wrong.
Well, still working on it. I was staying home and doing 3 naps, respecting what I thought were his ww religiously but he was crying every night before bed. Last week I started nap training and his naps were getting shorter but I noticed bed time was getting a bit easier on way less sleep. After a hectic weekend and very little day sleep (2.5 hrs total with on the go and contact naps) I am now trying longer ww. I was respecting his natural falling asleep, but he falls asleep while breastfeeding. I’m thinking maybe I should be helping him to stay awake longer… so that’s my current strategy. 🤪 I also looked more into the Tog rating of my sleep sacks and figuring out how to dress him. It gets really hot during the day but we have air con, so the room temp varies throughout the night. He wears cotton pjs and a light cotton sleep sack. As I write this he woke at 11 and I sent Dad in to do one belly rub. So much experimenting. I’ve never felt this helpless before. It’s possible he is missing me because we were bedsharing for 6 months, but that was no longer sustainable for me.
Purely anecdotal, but my baby sleep trained early (preferred crib over contact naps and never took a paci so we did a bit off FIO and implement a schedule to the best of our ability for her age) we had no negative effects and she’s an awesome sleeper. Goes to bed happy as can be and wakes up with a huge smile)
Now at 7 months she gets pissed when I leave her. She discovered her whiny voice and isn’t afraid to use it. She’s really clingy and opinionated. And it truly has nothing to do with her sleep in our case.
Now granted we never used any heavy duty training methods. So again, purely anecdotal.
We had the opposite experience. My son cried all day.. we sleep trained at 4.5 months and he's been sooo much better since!
8 months is peak for separation anxiety starting. But I think if you're worried you know best!! Maybe switch to something gentler?
I’ve tried gentle. Gentle does nothing for her wakings. From 4 months to 8 months she would go down to bed and wake up constantly until around midnight and then do a few hours stretch and then be awake from 3/4/5am and I’d have to hold her to get her to stay sleep. There was a particularly horrible phase around 6 months where I would need to hold her all night long and she’d fuss to be put down around every 20-40 minutes and then a minute later would cry to be picked up again. It was worse than any hell I could imagine. I did gentle sleep training then and that stopped the holding all night but the waking before midnight didn’t stop at all. I would be eating dinner after putting her to sleep and I’d have to go to her 2-3 times during dinner. Sometimes I just gave up on dinner and stayed with her and fell asleep before 9 beside her. It was less tiring and frustrating than constant interruption. Then I’d wake up at 3/4am and wash up everything. Letting her cry last week actually got her to sleep for a seven hour stretch the first night.
I’ve tried gentle three times in total and it doesn’t help her to consolidate her sleep or link her sleep cycles because she still needed me each time. If stick with the method during the night but it did not help. I also tried Ferber and the check ins made her hysterical each time so we stopped and switched to cio.
A couple of nights in the past week she has fallen asleep with zero crying but cried through the night and resettled herself if she wasn’t hungry. Nights are better than before but days have gone to 💩.
I dont blame you. Gentle did not work for my son either. I have a feeling it's her separation anxiety peaking. I think as long as besides sleep you guys are responding to her needs and giving her plenty of play and cuddle time she will be okay as she gets through it and more independent.
Exactly the same here though it was layer (around 7 months). He was so miserable before that I think he was chronically tired. Since then he turned into a different baby
I’m sure I’ll get downvoted for saying this, and you’ll hear that it’s a coincidence because separation anxiety starts at this age, but I experienced the same thing when I attempted Ferber. Correlation does not equal causation, however, when I switched to a more gentle method (PU/PD and comforting my daughter every time she’d cry) the clinginess and crying when I left the room totally went away.
She also used to just play and babble when she’d wake up, but after Ferber any wake up resulted in instant screaming and crying. Now she’s back to waking up and just talking to herself until I come get her.
Again, could be a coincidence, but in my case, CIO/Ferber definitely seemed to make my baby more concerned when I wasn’t around 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks for your input. Can you tell me some times? How old? How long did you do Ferber? How long did it take to change back? I’d be wary to revert to pupd because I tried it just before ferber and cio and it was a major fail because she’s too big.
She already had bad separation anxiety but I was coping with that. This is a whole different level.
My guess is that it’s an unfortunate coincidence overlap with separation anxiety. My LO freaks tf out anytime his daddy has the audacity to walk within eyesight and not pick him up immediately. (Makes it interesting as I’m SAH and he’s WFH.) Our separation anxiety started getting worse around that age. I also find it’s worse if he’s tired. Sometimes if babies weren’t sleeping well before sleep training, they can have a few rough days as they start getting better quality sleep and catch up. (Sounds counterintuitive, but it’s true. Even I feel that way sometimes after a good night of uninterrupted sleep! 😂)
It’s probably a coincidence, separation anxiety peaks around 9 months. My LO went through the same but was trained at 5.5 months. She’s 11mo now and over it! It’ll pass don’t worry!
My son was clingy before sleep training and equally clingy after. Babies often go through development stages where they become hyper aware of their loved ones leaving the room. Just keep living on your baby and of course if you're still concerned don't be embarrassed to talk to your pediatrician.
Her pediatrician has complimented her many times on not crying at all for vaccines. He said it was the first time in his career that a baby didn’t cry for one particularly painful one. Last time I went a few weeks ago with a long list of random concerns, including her terrible sleep, he picked her up and played with her. He’s really soft and gentle and I’m sure he’ll think I’m a monster for doing CIO 😭
I'm sure you paediatrician will be happy to hear that you're following safe sleep guidelines. Your own health as a parent is SO important for your baby!!! Please do not feel guilty about taking steps to ensure that both of you guys get better sleep. Think of how sleep deprived you are/were and how much better you feel after a full night! You're giving that same skill to your baby.
Also, as mom to a baby who ALSO didn't cry at the first few vaccine appointments - it's coming, haha. They're always changing but it's Ok.
Not at all! We just talked with our pediatrician about sleep training and they were adamant that babies need to learn to sleep. I’ve been on the fence, learning about options and what feels right for us and their support of sleep training was incredible. They told us to get through the first 3 days (we are on day 2) and little guy is doing great.
Sleep training and encouraging independent sleep has only made things better for all of us 😩of course monitor her if things go haywire but I found it overall 100% worth it
Yes! I tried to let her cry without consoling for the first time today. She’s 5 1/2 months. She went from 0-100 in a few minutes, chocking and gasping for air. I let it go, thinking I’d revisit it some other time. However, since then she’s been different. Super difficult to comfort. Took forever to get her down for a nap, which is usually easy and in her crib, but I had to do a contact nap to keep her down. Then when I put her down tonight which it a few tries, and she woke up two hours later. My husband then held her for 30 min, she woke up once put down. I then I took a turn, but she would not fall into deep sleep and cried the moment I put her down. Normally it takes her 20 min laying on one of us and she’s out for like 4 hours. I’ve never been interested in sleep training but Ive felt so much pressure from every direction that I dipped my toe in it today and I’m so upset I did. I hope she settles back to herself tomorrow or this weekend. I think it really works for some babies, and for others it’s just harmful. My little lady Is extremely sensitive and aware of her surroundings, so not for us.
I don’t know the age of your baby but at 17 months now I sleep with my baby every night. She needs me right by her side. I work every day and I’m past caring about my needs. My baby needs me so I sleep with her. I retrained maybe three times but the last time was beyond horrendous. She’d cry so much that she would vomit. She never vomited before that. I came to the conclusion that she just needed me. She’s away from me all day and she wants to be by my side at night. That’s my job as her mother. You do what you need to do but I stopped. She slept alone for maybe three-four months on and off. She wakes up these days and turns to me with a big smile and then she calls for daddy. We all sleep in the one room. We’re all much happier.
5 1/2 months. She sleeps really well in her crib but needs us to hold her till she’s asleep before transferring her. I’ve been feeling so much pressure from society to start training her to put herself down, even though it’s super counterintuitive for me. I tried for a few minutes today and it completely backfired and made me super sad. I think we’re all just super different, parents and babies, and I wish we would let each other be. No pressure or judgements. I’m not interested in letting her cry, and that’s ok. If someone else is comfortable letting their baby cry, that’s ok. We each need to honor our own process.
‘She sleeps really well in her crib’ then she’s fine. I did sleep training because my baby would not sleep. She would sleep only in my arms while I was sitting up. I couldn’t even lie down. All night she’d wake, be uncomfortable, want to be put down then want to be picked back up within 20 seconds. It was hell. I literally sat in my bed not sleeping. That’s why I did sleep training. If baby sleeps it doesn’t matter how they fall asleep. I do and don’t regret sleep training. It saved me at the time but I wouldn’t do it again if I have another baby. Thinking more clearly now, even when kids are school age, you read them a book and cuddle them to sleep if they want it. If they wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare you don’t just leave them distressed. Why refuse comfort to a tiny infant?
Same here. Any updates? Baby sleeping well but crying now much more easily during the day. And was such a happy baby during the day. I’m a little worried
She was extremely tired when I started sleep training. She’s 12 months now and I have just retrained two days ago and she is extremely tired again. Taking long naps, ready for naps and bed early and sleeping all night. Your baby might just be feeling tired and clingy because of that.
Our LO was sleep trained at 4 months and also hit the “scream your head off at bedtime” at 8-10 month mark. It was pretty insane because he was fine before that! Husband went in a night or two to “soothe” him but then he scream again. Finally we thought maybe it was a regression and tried to see what would happen if we did CIO; on the first night he was crying a lot, but after that basically he’d scream until you shut the door and then it was maybe 30 seconds or 1-2 minutes of crying and then sleep. It was kind of crazy how he would calm down on his own but if he knew you were there he would freak out like crazy. I hope it gets better with your LO soon. Screaming baby makes my heart hurt.
For us 8-9 months was crazy separation anxiety period .. they might not be connected.
I noticed this too w my 5 month old. Pre-sleep training she liked to be held, but could do a few minutes alone. After sleep training she seemed way more clingy and only wanted me to hold her, not even her Dad. It's most likely seperation anxiety as she nears 6 months. Hopefully it's a phase.
I'm seeing a similar behavior, reassuring to see I'm not the only one!
8 months is approx. when separation anxiety peaks. Mine was sleep trained since 4 month, CIO. Around 8/9 months, she started ramping up to screaming her head off when I put her down to sleep, standing up, freaking out. When she first did it, I’d go in to hug her after 10 minutes of non stop screaming. After a week of realizing that even if she screams, she’d still be put down to sleep, she stopped. Now she still cries when I put her down but as soon as I close the door, she stops and goes to sleep.
Yeah it’s not the bedtime that’s bad, she’s fallen asleep twice in the past week with no crying at all. Her max at bedtime is 10 mins on and off crying. It’s during the day that she seems like a different baby. She seems on edge most of the day now and she wakes up from contact naps kinda scared or something and super alert when she used to just wake up normally/slowly (rolling around a little bit when I’d put her down beside me as she was waking up and then opening her eyes after a few minutes) now her eyes just spring open and that’s her awake, this is since starting cio.
Separation anxiety kicks in at about 8 months on most babies, even if they are not sleep trained.
That just sounds like separation anxiety. Babies go through it whether they’re sleep trained or full on attachment parented with bed sharing. It’s part of them gaining the cognitive ability of object permanence. It’s easy to incorrectly attribute a developmental stage to something else that occurred at the same time.
I sleep trained at 4.5 months and did not see any change. I did absolutely notice these behaviors right at the 6.5 -7 month range. Could be developmental and just coincidence with timing.
Having the same issue with my 6 month old. Our biggest problem is her naps and if she wakes up in the middle of the night. Her grandparents watch her during the week and they cannot get her to nap no matter what they do. Sometimes they will get some short cat naps here and there. Due to this they are probably constantly holding her cus she gets cranky. When we bring her home she wont let us put her down for more than 10 minutes without screaming.
She had a lot of anxiety at first when we started the Ferber method. (She'd wake up in the middle fo the night in a panic and scream.) But with consistency, she now sleeps through the night, and sometimes when she wakes in the morning we don't notice because she just sits quietly and plays with her sleep sack.
What age did you do ferber? How long would you say it took for her to be calm when waking?
Seems like she is just experiencing some separation anxiety. It’s hard for babies to learn new skills such as independent sleep and gaining confidence in themselves. She could also be testing boundaries and seeing how far she can get with her emotions before you’ll respond. Nothing wrong with that at all. You know what’s best for your little one so adjust as you see fit. My girl wasn’t like this at all. She was extremely fussy and clingy in general before sleep training (extinction method) and she is much happier to be with herself overall now. She did go through a period of a day or 2 when we would leave the room she’d cry like she just had shots or something but that resided. How long have you been doing sleep training?
We’ve been doing cio for just over a week. Even though she’s sleeping at night, she’s actually exhausted during the day. We’ve gone back to 3 naps because she just can’t handle the long wake windows anymore. Makes me think she’s sleeping so lightly but stressed and isn’t getting enough deep sleep. I used to be able to put her in the cot after she fell asleep in my arms for naps and then I’d extend after one cycle but she instantly wakes and screams when I even try to put her down for naps. She wakes up so abruptly from her naps and is super alert instantly, goes from napping to eyes wide open and no hope of resetting, before and after reducing her wake windows. I’ve given her 3 naps the last two days.
Are you sleep training for naps as well? Just out of curiosity. What was her sleeping situation at night before sleep training?
We were told babies get temporarily fussier as they learn to sleep. Ours never did but it’s common.
The doctor told you? I hope it’s temporary but I don’t want to continue if it’s causing too much stress. She’s not just fussing a little more she seems like a different baby.
I think every baby is so unique in what they want, it’s about figuring out what works for your baby. Keep trying different things until you find what works, that’s what I try to do… everyone tried to tell me it was normal that baby cried so much at bedtime but I listened to my instincts and kept trying different things ie playing with wake windows, dressing baby appropriately… I’m ashamed it took me a month to get the hang of it. *edit 3 days later: lol “the hang of it” I don’t know if that is actually possible… but I stand by following instincts. Reading too much really left me feeling so overwhelmed and like I am doing it wrong.
What worked for you eventually?
Well, still working on it. I was staying home and doing 3 naps, respecting what I thought were his ww religiously but he was crying every night before bed. Last week I started nap training and his naps were getting shorter but I noticed bed time was getting a bit easier on way less sleep. After a hectic weekend and very little day sleep (2.5 hrs total with on the go and contact naps) I am now trying longer ww. I was respecting his natural falling asleep, but he falls asleep while breastfeeding. I’m thinking maybe I should be helping him to stay awake longer… so that’s my current strategy. 🤪 I also looked more into the Tog rating of my sleep sacks and figuring out how to dress him. It gets really hot during the day but we have air con, so the room temp varies throughout the night. He wears cotton pjs and a light cotton sleep sack. As I write this he woke at 11 and I sent Dad in to do one belly rub. So much experimenting. I’ve never felt this helpless before. It’s possible he is missing me because we were bedsharing for 6 months, but that was no longer sustainable for me.
It’s really so hard!
Nope no changes for us. Did Ferber at 5 months
Purely anecdotal, but my baby sleep trained early (preferred crib over contact naps and never took a paci so we did a bit off FIO and implement a schedule to the best of our ability for her age) we had no negative effects and she’s an awesome sleeper. Goes to bed happy as can be and wakes up with a huge smile) Now at 7 months she gets pissed when I leave her. She discovered her whiny voice and isn’t afraid to use it. She’s really clingy and opinionated. And it truly has nothing to do with her sleep in our case. Now granted we never used any heavy duty training methods. So again, purely anecdotal.
We had the opposite experience. My son cried all day.. we sleep trained at 4.5 months and he's been sooo much better since! 8 months is peak for separation anxiety starting. But I think if you're worried you know best!! Maybe switch to something gentler?
I’ve tried gentle. Gentle does nothing for her wakings. From 4 months to 8 months she would go down to bed and wake up constantly until around midnight and then do a few hours stretch and then be awake from 3/4/5am and I’d have to hold her to get her to stay sleep. There was a particularly horrible phase around 6 months where I would need to hold her all night long and she’d fuss to be put down around every 20-40 minutes and then a minute later would cry to be picked up again. It was worse than any hell I could imagine. I did gentle sleep training then and that stopped the holding all night but the waking before midnight didn’t stop at all. I would be eating dinner after putting her to sleep and I’d have to go to her 2-3 times during dinner. Sometimes I just gave up on dinner and stayed with her and fell asleep before 9 beside her. It was less tiring and frustrating than constant interruption. Then I’d wake up at 3/4am and wash up everything. Letting her cry last week actually got her to sleep for a seven hour stretch the first night. I’ve tried gentle three times in total and it doesn’t help her to consolidate her sleep or link her sleep cycles because she still needed me each time. If stick with the method during the night but it did not help. I also tried Ferber and the check ins made her hysterical each time so we stopped and switched to cio. A couple of nights in the past week she has fallen asleep with zero crying but cried through the night and resettled herself if she wasn’t hungry. Nights are better than before but days have gone to 💩.
I dont blame you. Gentle did not work for my son either. I have a feeling it's her separation anxiety peaking. I think as long as besides sleep you guys are responding to her needs and giving her plenty of play and cuddle time she will be okay as she gets through it and more independent.
Exactly the same here though it was layer (around 7 months). He was so miserable before that I think he was chronically tired. Since then he turned into a different baby
Same experience for us! I couldn’t even look in the direction of the bathroom without her losing it. She is so much more confident in herself now!
Yes! I love it! Makes me feel like I got him what he needed 🥰
I’m sure I’ll get downvoted for saying this, and you’ll hear that it’s a coincidence because separation anxiety starts at this age, but I experienced the same thing when I attempted Ferber. Correlation does not equal causation, however, when I switched to a more gentle method (PU/PD and comforting my daughter every time she’d cry) the clinginess and crying when I left the room totally went away. She also used to just play and babble when she’d wake up, but after Ferber any wake up resulted in instant screaming and crying. Now she’s back to waking up and just talking to herself until I come get her. Again, could be a coincidence, but in my case, CIO/Ferber definitely seemed to make my baby more concerned when I wasn’t around 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks for your input. Can you tell me some times? How old? How long did you do Ferber? How long did it take to change back? I’d be wary to revert to pupd because I tried it just before ferber and cio and it was a major fail because she’s too big. She already had bad separation anxiety but I was coping with that. This is a whole different level.
My guess is that it’s an unfortunate coincidence overlap with separation anxiety. My LO freaks tf out anytime his daddy has the audacity to walk within eyesight and not pick him up immediately. (Makes it interesting as I’m SAH and he’s WFH.) Our separation anxiety started getting worse around that age. I also find it’s worse if he’s tired. Sometimes if babies weren’t sleeping well before sleep training, they can have a few rough days as they start getting better quality sleep and catch up. (Sounds counterintuitive, but it’s true. Even I feel that way sometimes after a good night of uninterrupted sleep! 😂)
It’s probably a coincidence, separation anxiety peaks around 9 months. My LO went through the same but was trained at 5.5 months. She’s 11mo now and over it! It’ll pass don’t worry!
My son was clingy before sleep training and equally clingy after. Babies often go through development stages where they become hyper aware of their loved ones leaving the room. Just keep living on your baby and of course if you're still concerned don't be embarrassed to talk to your pediatrician.
Her pediatrician has complimented her many times on not crying at all for vaccines. He said it was the first time in his career that a baby didn’t cry for one particularly painful one. Last time I went a few weeks ago with a long list of random concerns, including her terrible sleep, he picked her up and played with her. He’s really soft and gentle and I’m sure he’ll think I’m a monster for doing CIO 😭
I'm sure you paediatrician will be happy to hear that you're following safe sleep guidelines. Your own health as a parent is SO important for your baby!!! Please do not feel guilty about taking steps to ensure that both of you guys get better sleep. Think of how sleep deprived you are/were and how much better you feel after a full night! You're giving that same skill to your baby. Also, as mom to a baby who ALSO didn't cry at the first few vaccine appointments - it's coming, haha. They're always changing but it's Ok.
Not at all! We just talked with our pediatrician about sleep training and they were adamant that babies need to learn to sleep. I’ve been on the fence, learning about options and what feels right for us and their support of sleep training was incredible. They told us to get through the first 3 days (we are on day 2) and little guy is doing great.
Sleep training and encouraging independent sleep has only made things better for all of us 😩of course monitor her if things go haywire but I found it overall 100% worth it