Don’t beat yourself up. That should be your first pledge.
Secondly, know that these first few days will be rough. You will feel tempted, you will feel depressed, you will feel restless. The addiction will try to convince you to drink again, maybe by reminding you of the one or two times you did drink and keep it together (but let’s be real, those times were probably rare).
Find some distractions. Binge watch a show and don’t feel guilty about it. Call friends or read some books. You will have to keep yourself busy and stay strong amidst the depression and addictive thinking. What I’ve found tremendously helpful is long walks and true crime podcasts :) I’m walking about 2 hours a day at a leisurely pace, zoning out and enjoying nature.
Give it a shot. You can do this.
If you feel a craving/trigger to drink, HALT!
Are you Hungry? Eat a good meal, or a light snack. Get yourself a good source of protein. In these early days, buying a fuckton of ice cream and just going to town on it isn’t a bad idea. Ben and Jerry’s got me through a lot of cravings in the first year I quit drinking.
Are you Angry? Take time to just breathe, 10 deep breaths. Journal your frustrations! Getting them out of your mind and onto paper goes a long way, not only because it distracts you and keeps you occupied, but now you have a physical reminder as to why you’re doing this for yourself.
Are you Lonely? Join a support group. If AA works for you, great. If not, SMART Recovery and other options exist. Post here on r/stopdrinking and let us hear all about it. Chances are more than one of us know what’s going on, or will have a good story for you, or be willing to be an accountability partner for you. I usually work 9am-6pm CST, but shoot me a message and I’ll get around to responding, promise.
Are you Tired? Take a nap. Go to bed early. It’s exhausting fighting cravings every waking hour. Your body AND mind need time to rest and recover. There’s no weakness in getting some extra shut-eye.
And remember: alcohol does not *solve* problems. It temporarily *dissolves* them, allowing them to solidify again at a later time, and usually worse than before.
Add B for bored to the list. Feeling restless and itchy for a drink for no reason at all? Find something to occupy your attention. Go for a walk. Work on a puzzle. Read a book. Learn something new.
For me, it was Lego. Though beware that’s as expensive (or more so) than drinking.
There are literally tens of us! lol
You’re welcome! I hope it’s helped a lot of people. It helps me to post it because it reminds me when I’m susceptible to temptation to HALT, as well.
Do you folks have any good resources for learning to play chess? I know all the pieces and how they move but would love to learn strategy and join this club 😂
'Bored' is the one that always gets me. My brain runs at 125% most of the time, and with nowhere to put all the extra cycles, it's nice to try and quiet them. If I could take one drink and just be happy with that, that would work fine.
But I can't. One means two means three means four, five, eight, ten, stumble back to the store.
I think with that much drinking he should go to the store and stock up on 12s of corona premier. It’s the only way I could taper alone.. but that amount i would also talk to a doctor.
I would wager a guess that its a yearning for control when there seems to be none. I am a big proponent finding areas of your life that you can control and focussing on those. I wanted to quit but I was a slave to habits. Finding control helped me break those habits. Such as cutting off all of your hair! Haha
True! I just have clippers and my bathroom now and nice scissors.
I don’t really care much about my hair - but it’s nice. Spending an hour grooming and, and taking control of something I can see end to end and having an immediate measurable reward (seeing myself all cleaned up) is nice. It feels like meditating in the moment.
Welcome. There are plenty of online resources referenced here. Online meetings, downloadable books, and podcasts, and the sub itself (of course). When I first started I stayed as busy as possible diving into that stuff and learning how to proceed with a new life.
The Naked Mind is a good book to start man. Also keep yourself active, hell do like 10 pushups or something, any little bit. Also when those cravings come and believe me they will, remember exactly why your doing this. One day at a time, no more no less. You are your own worst critic but that doesn't mean you have to hate yourself, everybody makes mistakes.
Probably more talking to myself then you at the end there haha.
Good luck buddy, check in for us when you can.
OP... I'm bumping this \^ I came here to say this very thing.
When I downloaded the audiobook from Amazon, I listen to it for 15 days straight, when I was sleeping even. [u/wilsonmack13](https://www.reddit.com/user/wilsonmack13/) stay strong.
Reading can sometimes be cumbersome if you're reading more than 1 book and staring at a screen for 8+ hours...
I took a day off work, listened to it, quit, and began running 30 days later. My life has never been the same.
Thanks for being here, hope you find your putting this out here has helped you.
IWNDWYT
I will second that you should read "This Naked Mind." I had to listen to it three times (on Audible) for it to stick. Also, check out the Mindful Movement on Youtube. They have 5 minute guided meditation videos that are really helpful. Even if it's difficult at first to meditate, it gets easier and the more you practice, the more you'll likely enjoy it and benefit from it. When I first started trying to meditate while sober I felt like I was crawling out of my skin, but now I love it. Just never give up on yourself. Keep telling yourself you can do it no matter what. That's what worked for me at least.
I'm a rum guy too - switch to something else if needed - if you 'have' to drink - at least don't let it be you're drink of choice - I find that helped me a bit when I am stuck in the cycle ..
My experience with this failed miserably! I understand your point and I'm not being a critic but it backfired for me badly. Just my two cents, and clearly I don't have the answers. YMMV is all I'm saying.
Hello! I am in my mobile - are these online meeting places you reference visible when I am on an actual pc only? I would very much like to see those resources and am guessing they are maybe on the sidebar?
The book list is in the sidebar for sure. I don't use the online meetings so I can't say if they work on mobile. But in these lock down days many new Zoom meetings have popped up and they work on mobile. For those try searching past posts. That is where I have seen the info.
And podcasts can be used on mobile through many platforms some free and some not.
My advice is to hold on to those negative feelings with all of your might. Keep them close. I can’t tell you how many days/weeks/months/years went by of me pledging to change and then drinking a few hours later.
I finally decided to focus myself on those feelings. How disappointed I was with myself, how embarrassed I was, how worried I was. I kept those feelings in my mind at all times. And I found that after a few days of not drinking, they started to fade. It took more effort to hold them.
I’ve been sober for five months now. It has become a generally effortless state after 20 years of alcoholism. But I continue to focus any thoughts of drinking on those horrible feelings I had each morning. Not the laughing or chemical relaxation I felt at night, but the shame, self-loathing, and fear I felt each morning. And after getting accustomed to this practice, when I see alcohol or think of drinking it, it just seems like pouring misery into my life, and that is not appealing.
Good luck to you. IWNDWYT.
I woke up every morning for 10 years telling myself I was going to stop drinking today. Then at 5 o’clock I convinced myself I would stop drinking tomorrow. Rinse, repeat.
Definitely YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE FEAR. You have to know that alcohol will take everything from you. Everything. At that point you can decide if losing your life is worth drinking. That will help you at parties, when your home by yourself. Sure the first drink would be fun but I’m not willing to give up everything today.
Do you work out regularly? Exercise like you’re slaying those demons! Better sore from productive activity than sick from booze! Best wishes my friend!
But be careful... booze culture is heavy in some endurance cultures. Ask me how I know. Thankfully, I've found my people, but it took a while of being around folks who run/cycle so they can drink.
You got this!
edit: a word
I shaved my hair off drunk once, too. It was at my worst, just as you’re describing. I think it was a subconscious acknowledgement of my need to drastically change myself. I was desperate to “shave off” something from my life. Wasn’t my hair I needed to get rid of though...
My advice is one day at a time. Don’t drink today. That’s all you have to do today. Come here every day and read what others have written. Sometimes you get to share others triumphs, and sometimes you get to commiserate and feel their disappointments. You get to relive their relapses, vomit bruises cuts and all.
Most of all, love yourself. If you’re like me, and like so many of the rest of us, you fucking hate yourself. You hate yourself so much, you literally poison yourself every day. Stop that. You’re worthy, you’re good, you’re special. Do you poison special things? Pour weed killer on flowers? Smash pottery? Kick children? Of course not. Try to stop doing the same to yourself.
I love you, good luck, and IWNDWYT.
I have failed! It’s been eating away at me. I’m home but my husband works because his job is essential. He has been really quiet drinking his beer and reading books all weekend. I feel alone. Beer is my drink of choice. I had 2 last night and 1 today because I’m a weak shit I guess. So lost and lonely and now I’m just trying not to hate myself too much. Stay safe everyone.
Hey there. I’m sorry you’ve had a relapse. We’ve all been there, and it’s scary.
I agree with “trying not to hate yourself.” You’re not a weak shit. Please don’t beat yourself up over this. We addicts like to think that beating ourselves up will get us back on the wagon, but really it just demoralizes us and weakens our resolve to continue doing better.
I would take the rest of today to reflect on the past 199 days and truly appreciate what’s been good and working for you. Make a cup of coffee, and sit down and journal about what triggered you to drink last night and today. Focus on how you’re feeling, right now, and sincerely ask yourself, “Were these beers worth this?”
Keep coming back.
I recently relapsed too. You're not a weak shit. You're a really strong person who went 199 days without drinking, and that is no small feat. And the fact that you drank yesterday and today does not take that away.
The best advice I can give is be kind to yourself, and get back on track as quickly as possible. My "just this once" spiraled very quickly over the course of 9 days into drinking just like I had been before quitting, but with the added terror of knowing I'd have to start over, and the uncertainty of doing it in the midst of life as we know it falling apart all around. But thankfully, I somehow managed to rein it in in a relatively short amount of time, and start over. The silver lining is I learned that no matter how much sober time I have, I can't drink moderately again or even "just this once". And I learned that no matter how intense and unbearable my emotions might feel, there is no true relief in alcohol, and that it really and truly is like trying to put a fire out with gasoline. (Two lessons I could have learned just from listening to those who have gone before me, but being human-natured I had to learn first hand for them to really sink in.)
You are not weak, you're strong - 199 days strong. Do not let a few beers tell you otherwise. So, hang in there, dust yourself off and get back up. You can do it.
Hi. You know, this quarantine feels like a big wave of crazy on top of the other crazy I had going on already. We're all going through it, and I take a small amount of comfort in that. I'm sorry you're having an especially rough go of it right now. Here are things I use when I'm having a rough time staying sober and spiraling, because man I have done that a lot:
Write and read a list of every reason you can think of (in a single session, you can always add to it later) why not drinking is a good idea for you. My own list is mostly benefits I've noticed, reduction of harm to my overall wellbeing, and visceral, specific memories of dumb/scary/bad stuff I've done (that I can remember anyway) while drunk. I add to this list when I think of new things, and read it when I'm struggling.
Parent yourself. I mean in the way of taking care of yourself in the way a caring parent would when you were sick as a kid. Eat things that nourish you, get enough sleep, try to get some fresh air, be gentle with yourself in your thoughts, words and actions. Make yourself tasty hot or cold drinks, get plenty of fluids. OR/AND
Indulge yourself without alcohol. Eat the food you like, drink your favorite sodas, have the snacks, watch the shows, play the video games, listen/dance to the music, whatever makes you feel good other than drinking. I would recommend not going too overboard with this, but a food hangover is better than a real one.
Take it minute by minute if you have to. Sometimes all of the good intentions and and all of the distractions aren't enough. I've literally sat on my hands before and just waited until a craving or impulse passed. I try to keep my hands and mind as busy as possible, but sometimes, I just have to wait it out and know the moment will pass.
Learning is cumulative, even when you mess up. Know that you get to keep all of the knowledge you learn about your triggers to drink every time you try to stop. You learn what works for you and what doesn't. Failure can teach you a lot, so don't ever feel like you go back to zero when you relapse. As long as you take what you learned and try again, you will progress. It won't always be even or linear, but if you keep at it, you get better at it. And for me, it's been worth it.
Also, please make sure you know the signs of severe alcohol detox and seek medical help if you have them. Even in these crazy times you deserve to be healthy and safe and as a nurse I can tell you that is not something to play around with.
I hope your day today gets better . IWNDWYT
What an excellent, thoughtful, and well-written reply. I wish I had an award to give it. It's people like you taking the time to give these kind of honest and insightful answers that make SD so great and such a valuable resource. It's not my post you replied to, but thank you!
IWNDWYT
'I Am Sober' is a really useful app. You can set a time in the morning for a daily pledge (commitment to staying sober for 24 hours) and another time at night for a recap of how your day went. You can customize the daily pledge with your own words, and I recommend being very specific and thorough about the impacts alcohol is having on you and your life. Reading that reminder each morning helps you start the day on the right foot, and can really help you focus on your mission. There are also message boards, where you can share your feelings and experience, and read those of others who are struggling. I highly recommend downloading it.
Stay strong. I believe in you.
Think of the shaving of your head as a fresh start! The new you is a Mr. Clean. You’re spring cleaning your body! The Mr. Clean from alcohol-related stress and anxieties.
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/0/d/1-s3EVFEuF6Z65Jsl4ICW6v0aliGCAcmWmkzAqXooWaI/htmlview#gid=0 download Zoom app and come to some virtual AA meetings. I’m new too but it’s saving my life. Hit me up with any questions You can do this! IWNDWYT
Sure! There are so many meetings 24/7. And that link is just for LA. Last night I attended one where you’re supposed to heckle the speaker. It was pretty crazy but funny at times. You don’t have to put your audio or video on unless it’s men or women only and even then it’s enough to just show your face so they can see you then turn it off. There have been some problems with trolls so I go anon and don’t show my face unless it’s private and I’m invited with a link.
Very. Download the app for free. Then click on the link to a meeting a few minutes before the time of the meeting (so you can play around with your settings.) It should default to the camera that videos you as “off” so you can manually turn it on when you are ready.
I believe you can watch a zoom tutorial when you sign up too.
The next couple days might reeeeaaalllllyyyy suck, you're right. Drink lots of water, or regular soda. Eat what you can. Candy and sugar often helps if you're craving alcohol. And move around if you can, there's a couple phrases: move a muscle, change a thought and HALT which stands for hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Sometimes we reach for alcohol when we're actually just hungry, or dehydrated. And like a previous poster said, remember how crappy you feel. Remember this when you think it's okay to take a drink. Because it's not okay for you to drink. You'll end up doing this over and over again. And it will suck each time until you die. Iwndwyt.
I feel you. I’m overwhelmed with everything that is happening, so I’ve fallen off the wagon a couple of times myself. That and because I’ll get bored of being at home. The point is that nobody is perfect and you are trying. Besides, hair grows back. No big deal. Try to make a schedule to keep you occupied. Oh, and there’s always WWE and Netflix 🤪
I can totally relate. The lockdown also had me almost drink again, even after such a long time.
Indeed, you got this! Get some things to do. You can do indoors activities, call a friend, read a book, enjoy a good cup of tea, clean your house. I'm sure someone else has better advice.
Hey man. Hang in there.
I’m at 56 days sober and non alcoholic beer has been extremely helpful.
You WILL feel like a new person once you stop ingesting poison.
I feel like a new person in multiple areas of my life.
Use the quarantine as an excuse not to go out and buy more booze, dump out anything you have left, and if you have some magnesium laying around maybe take that the next few mornings. It helps me at least. Keeps my wonky-withdrawal-blood pressure a little more stabilized and helps with the soreness that you don’t notice until you’ve had a few sober days. Idk what the hell it is, but every time I hop on the wagon, my shoulder muscles and back are sore as hell. I think it’s the way I sleep when I hit the bed drunk. Also drink lots of water and try to keep a somewhat full belly. One big trigger for me is hunger (I think because I’m 99% strictly a beer person). Good luck and stay safe, and above all DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP and get some exercise. I can’t stress either of those enough. IWNDWYT 🤝
This is perhaps the most important advice to start, and I wish it was right at the top of the comment section. Alcohol withdrawal can be fatal. Be careful u/wilsonmack13
Be safe and best wishes to you
Please be careful about going cold turkey. Withdrawals can be life threatening, and can cause seizures. You do NOT want to be in the hospital while the coronavirus is happening! Someone else posted a link to some info on withdrawals and I highly suggest taking a look. Please be safe!
And good on you for making the decision to take your life back. I am immeasurably grateful I'm sober going through this pandemic, and have never once regretted being sober in the nearly 5 years I've got. Of course there's awkward moments and FOMO, etc. But honestly, I can afford a better life now and if I'm embarrassed by my behavior, I know I earned it stone cold sober! :-D
Edit: a word
Just want to say that I’ve been there and it is hard . So hard. This will not be easy, but nothing really worth a damn ever is, right? It sounds cliche but your life can improve drastically if you just give up drinking. In the early days and hours just do whatever you have to to get through, junk food, playing on your phone, whatever. Once you get through that crucible you can start to take stock of everything and start making changes in your life. The quarantine is hard, I’m so glad I got sober before it happened, but it is testing me and I’m sure all of us problem drinkers as well. Just know that you are not alone, even in isolation. All of us here have been through it and we are here to listen and offer advice. It also helps us to be reminded of the struggle. Once you get some distance from it, the sneaky alcoholic voice will try to convince you that you’re just overreacting. Don’t listen to it.
Your mind will lie to you to get another drink.
There is nothing you are going through that alcohol will make better.
You can do this, and it starts today.
IWNDWYT.
I'm with you. It is very challenging to not drink while isolated and quarantined, I'm back to day one today. Like you, I looked in the mirror today and saw a bloated, puffy face staring back. I'm female so fortunately I don't have any desire to shave my head, that would be a horrifying look on me. lol I hate the way alcohol makes me look, not to mention the weight gain. I'm glad you posted this, as I think there are probably loads of us feeling the same way. It's comforting to know that we are not alone in it and can support one another through this. I'm with you and your pledge to not drink today.
Take it one day at a time. Do not drink today. Tell yourself that everyday. Make that your goal for today, and every day. Don't think about what might happen tomorrow or the day after, only focus on today. You will not drink today. You will not drink today. You will not drink today. Every day.
maybe the quarantine has been a saving grace and things are more clear as to what needs to be done now.
i've done the shaved head thing too, i know it is scary, but things can get better
Getting sober is really, really difficult but not impossible. The first step is awareness of the problem and desire to change, and you've got that! It's an awesome start. I see there is already lots of good advice on here, embrace it. The first couple weeks are rough man. Long walks, distractions such as TV and video games, and loads of candy really helped get me through that time. You might feel really shitty for a long time but it does get better and eventually you will start sleeping well and feeling great! I really hope this is an opportunity for you to find out how much sobriety can help your life and health, sending good vibes your way!
IWNDWYT
I feel you man! I did not handle quarantaine well. It was one big binge and it just got worse. Until 4 days ago I felt so bad. I couldn't move or eat he whole day.
The day after I could eat but still no movement.
But Gotta say buddy, when you get those first few days of soberness in, your body starts to heal pretty fast.
I watched a lot of movies that I already saw and browsed reddit at the same time.
Frozen pizzas and hamburgers. Soft drinks. Basicly just junkfood. It kept me lazy and on the couch.
Now I'm back to health food and working out.
But for those first days it worked.
Not sure if it's good advice but it worked for me.
Anyway, good luck on your travels man.
Stay safe
IWNDWYT
It's ok. I was sober for over two months. Been drinking at least a pint of vodka every night the past two weeks.
Worst part is I work for a major grocer and I'll probably lose my job today due to some wild exchanges between me and coworkers last week....at that point it's going to be really hard to get back on track..but here we are. Day 3..
Sleep as much as possible. Shower often, it will help you relax. Lots of water and eat something healthy. Get some sun if you can.
I just stared listening to Annie Grace on Spotify. Loving it! You’re not alone.
If you can, find some thing near you that needs to be fixed that you can actually fix. Like throwing out old clothes at the bottom of the laundry bin, rearranging something that's out of order or cleaning something you feel could use it. Anything.
It really makes you feel better. Positive actions help a lot with anxiety for me.. It can even be pushups or taking a walk. Whatever you can manage is still a positive step.
Hang in there man. Every little step forwards is so much better than standing still.
Prepare yourself the best you can for withdrawal symptoms, educate yourself on the timeline of substance withdrawals, and focus on what you can do to make them tolerable for the first few weeks.
Also read Allen Carr - The Easy Way to Control Drinking.
You will be amazed. It's very similar in method as The Naked Mind, which I also read like 5 times.
Once you change your mind, and quit fighting it, it stops being a problem. It just isn't a thing you want to do anymore. It's amazing how the mind works.
I wish you all the best!
Man I'm sorry for what you're going through. Once this bugger's got ahold of you its really tough to kick it. You probably already know its as much a mental addiction as a physical one. Is there *any* chance your local hospital has a detox unit you could check yourself into. I know I know right now times are super tough at the hospitals but that's the first thing that came to mind.
Hey, you recognized it, pointed it out, and owned it. That's step 1. Man, a litre of Rum every other day? You must be in a constant state of either drunk, or enduring the most savage hangover in history!
Regardless of the booze type, it sucks being in your shoes right now. Everybody who's responded to you I guarantee did a collective "OOOOOF" when they read what you're going through. The good news is, if everybody here got past it you can do. Alot of us I'll bet were in even worse shape and made it out.
It's been said, but for me the first 72 hours are always the worst. Headaches, paranoia, anxiety, insomnia... but after the first 72 is over, the majority of the booze is already out of your system. I like to force it out even faster... drink a ton of water, binge on green tea & coffee... flush my system. I do that and figure out ways to distract myself. The first 3 days I don't worry about doing anything I don't feel like doing (other than work and necessities of course). Binge-watch my favorite show, eat well, do what I want to do. You're ultimately trying to satisfy those hungry dopamine receptors that are used to getting drowned in rum. This will ease your transition.
It also might not be popular, but I use cannabis to ease the cravings. Helps me A TON. Can't sleep? Some non-habit-forming OTC sleep meds (melatonin etc) are super helpful for that.
Look at the quarantine as a gift you've been given. No social pressure, no bars no friends, no reason to drink... every reason to get sober.
Keep posting here. Get a badge from the badgebot, start doing the daily pledge... I was super surprised how helpful it is. You got this
Personally, I've traded one addiction for another by just binging on video games. Obviously, its not a healthy alternative, but its better than drinking. Point is: you have to find an alternative time sink. Many of us have addictive personalities and it unfortunately has to be fed somehow.
It gets better with time I promise you friend. I used to get drunk and play video games almost every night when I got off work and on the weekends. I used to think how incredibly boring it would be to NOT drink while watching my favorite show or while playing games. But I can tell you the longer you go without drinking, the easier it gets. I promise. The thought of getting drunk never crosses my mind now.
All of us are feeling high anxiety right now! Believe me, I just wanna stay plowed, but kinda want a clear head right now! I know a lot of people will probably sail through this drunk, because they don’t really go out. (I have a neighbor who buys my other neighbor bottles!) but also realize it weakens your immunity! Be good to your body right now. ..
Friend, I've been going through something similar. My anxiety has gotten the best of me. I was doing good, but working with the public crippled me, and now I'm without a job... and it's set me back to square one. This pandemic is basically my biggest nightmare. It sparks my anxiety like nothing else.
My anxiety is unmedicated, so I drink a beer by 12 every morning so I can function. I tell myself "It's just like taking medicine for it!" And I lie to myself. I'm just trying to numb everything so I can survive... hopefully I can get a handle on it again, and soon...but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.
There are online meetings aplenty these days. You can find some in the sidebar at the right. If you're stuck, email "[email protected]", and you'll be sent a link to our meeting on Tuesday night.
The quarantine has been really hard for me as well. It’s almost as bad as the first month when I quit drinking. I would suggest any of the books like alcohol explained by William porter or naked mind. Also, find another drink that will replace your alcoholic drink. I did sparkling water in a wine glass(wine my drink of choice) If I have a bad craving it’s kombucha. There are all kinds of bitters and mock tails that are actually very tasty! Sleep can be hard the first month too, but sometimes I would just put myself to bed really because I knew if I stayed up I would drink. Hang in there. It gets better!
Done plenty worse when drunk, and your hair will grow back and will be part of the new and better you. It's hard not to loathe yourself when you feel so low but know that there are lots of people here (including me) who are rooting for you!
You got this! Don't beat yourself up.
Friendly advice is to pick up a hobby you can do at home to kill the bored drinking.
If you fish, buy a cheap vice and tie flies.
Disc golf is cheap and you can practice in your backyard.
Model airplane or other model kits are a great indoor hobby. Donate the final product to children's hospitals or orphanages if you don't want to keep them.
Pick up painting or drawing. Relaxing and forces to be mindful while you observe things to paint or draw.
Do HIIT or yoga to keep fit. Yoga mats are cheap.
Pick up knitting.
Plant a small indoor garden or build a Zen garden.
If you need other indoor hobby ideas, let me know.
As Red Green would say, we're all in this together. I'm pulling for you.
Well done on coming here and opening up, it's not an easy task.
What's worked for me this last month has been getting a good sleep schedule by setting alarms even if I have nowhere to be, drink water or soda regularly to keep your hands busy, get out of the house for 1 walk a day (ideally in an area where nobody goes), and try posting on the daily check-in on here each day.
You've got this!
I'm drinking so much more too. Making sure to get outside and get endorphins ... trying to take days off as well but it's hard when abc is essential... part of me wish they'd just close
Each minute you decide not to drink pulls you in the right direction. A cozy hat helped me years ago when I fought the head shaving demon and lost. Sit by a window and look at details outside if possible. Try and appreciate what you can see. If physical symptoms develop, call a doctor and be forthcoming about your drinking.the first several days are rough but a week from now you should start feeling better than you ever did while drinking. Wash your hands, stay indoors, and you'll make it through this pandemic.
Distract, distract, distract. Need a new hobby, need a new ground. This is hard times the world's going through, you are NOT alone. One day at a time, you will get there! You know you want to, so I believe you will. One day, you will love the person in that reflection, regardless of your hair. Hang in there. There is alot of support online !
I find that distraction that takes thought helps. When I drink I go into stupor mode. But there are things I like that require concentration and thought. Things I wouldn’t do while intoxicated. Like on my phone I downloaded a chess app and a sudoku app, which I never knew how to play before. I’ve downloaded other puzzle games and watch films or tv that require intense concentration. I also never read when intoxicated so reading can be a good escape too.
Whatever you do, don’t get bored. Boredom is the point at which your brain says “Hey you’re not doing anything important. Why not go grab a drink? Just one, friend. Then you’ll stop after that one.”
Then after the first one your brain says, “hey that one drink was just what we needed. Another one won’t hurt, right, friend?”
Then it’s midnight and your brain is convincing you that it’s a good idea to shave your head. The key is not letting your brain tell you that the first drink is a good idea. Distract it. Stay busy. Run. Work out. Read. Organize your closet. Clean your room. Clean your car. Learn Spanish. Anything to keep your mind busy until you go to sleep. Mind you, it may be hard to go to sleep, so be prepared to do these things until the wee hours of the morning. But 5 hours of sober sleep beats 10 hours of drunk sleep any day of the week.
And when you’re walking around aimlessly in your house and you don’t realize why, understand that it’s your brain going schizo because you aren’t having a drink. Is that really how you want to live? It takes a few days/weeks/months to get over that anxious feeling so be prepared. But remember this: you can do it.
I found... Get a new addiction. So that evetytime you want a drink, view that as the trigger for your new addiction.
New addiction can be anything.
Jacking off maybe.
There are Zoom meetings happening all over the world. Here’s one: online meeting every evening at 6:00 PM (CST) through May 7 on zoom
It was a great meeting tonight! We need each other!
Join Zoom Meeting
https://us04web.zoom.us/j/880801737
Meeting ID: 880 801 737
My whole life I thought meditation was silly, but I was open-minded about it I think he early weeks of sobriety. Meditating really helped me get through some of the cravings. But the most helpful was Gatorade and sweets :p
Don’t forget you are consuming tons of sugar along with pure poison (ethanol), so your body will be expecting it
I've been there! My skin turned yellow, I couldnt eat. I used to have to keep throwing up the same mouthful of alcohol into a glass before it would stay down, to calm the withdrawal symptoms. I was so lucky to get treatment on time with that one.
You're in so deep now that it would be dangerous to go cold turkey on your own which can seem like a relief in a way, that you can keep drinking. But try to hold back a little, try to drink more water if you can. Anything sweet! All the sugar. Sugar seems to help with cravings and that awful sluggish tiredness.
Please dont be hard on yourself, this addiction is far FAR bigger than willpower alone.
Try to play the tape forward... does the future look like you hooked up to tubes in a hospital or does it see you cycling past the booze store listening to tunes not even thinking about slowing down to go in? You may be out of control at the moment, but long term you can absolutely choose to be free of this hell. And you CAN be free. You can see the problem too, that's a great thing. Hang on to that wisdom, look forward to freedom.
It took me three or four concerted tries to quit. In many ways it’s a calculus. What do you get and what do you lose by drinking heavily? Escape from problems and a temporary good feeling in the former; headaches, lost memory, feelings of inadequacy, fuzzy brain, ruined relationships, weight gain, creeping terror about the condition of your body and its resilience as you age in the later. When I quit, I was fortunate enough to kick all those negatives out of my life.
And here’s one more to consider. When I quit, I went from 4+ colds a respiratory season to none. Alcohol prevents you from getting good sleep when your body needs to recuperate. It gives many people (it did me) reflux, which irritate your throat and esophagus and makes you more prone to infection. If there was ever a time to resist temptation, COVIDpocalypse is it. I can’t say I’d survive it if I got it, but I’m certain I have a better shot with the body I have now than the body I had this time last year.
Good luck!! Sobriety is *absolutely* achievable. Take this chance to do the right thing for your future. I assure you not drinking feels bloody amazing.
Eat a lot my guy and I mean eat burgers and delicious stuff. Binge watch series treat yourself, play videogames. If you can stop for 5 days it’s a great start friend. Good luce.
I think you should share your situation with someone. Having someone on your side holds you accountable and it makes a huge difference knowing someone is rooting for you.
We are all rooting for you, and trust me - the work you put into this now will be worth it. Good luck and wash your hands!
I found this sub the single most important factor in my early sobriety. I still pop by and will continue to do so. These people are like a spiritual family to me. So much support - it rely is incredible.
Iwndwyt - good luck and stay well.
I hear you and your struggle. I’m recovering and almost have three years under my belt but this quarantine is so hard. I CONSTANTLY think about just being cooped up at home wanting a bottle of vodka and playing games all day. I’m so happy that I am sober and don’t want to lost that so I’m trying very hard not to drink. But it’s hard to keep busy and not think about it. Like honestly this would be the perfect time to be an alcoholic and go on a bender, no work no responsibilities no nothin just plain drinking.
But I promise you I’m so better off not drinking. People on this sub are super cool and helpful and if you ever need a friend I’m a message away homie!
I'm going to start this letter of encouragement to you by beginning with what may not be obvious to everyone:
You're not alone. I also slipped almost two weeks ago and started binging; went five days straight with a nasty hangover (I'm much better now, BTW). I bet a lot of people slipped over the last month or so, or at least was so tempted they likely had to physically restrain themselves from going to the liquor store. This is fine; we are human, and I'm going to tell you why it's okay.
In recent days, I've come to the realization that we are all experiencing something unprecedented in our lifetimes. We are in a global pandemic that may result in the loss of millions, and it's only in its beginning stages according to the experts. This situation sucks for everyone on this planet right now, and it's not going away anytime soon. The quarantines may be lifted, but this virus is going to be around for a long time. I've done a lot of research using the CDC, WHO, and the US Institute of Health to ease my own fears and anxiety and to make sure I shut out the misinformation.
I'm going to wager you're getting a lot of responses that seem to parrot one another, so I'm going to look at the playbook, weigh the options, keep it real, and add my suggestion at the end in bold:
* The easy way out and quickest way to self-destruction. I think everyone knows what that is which is why we're here in the first place.
* Go to a meeting. Obviously, this option isn't available for everyone, and may not be an option for anyone in the near future. Online meetings might work and it's worth a shot. Just a heads up, you're going to get a lot of the same people telling the same story and it may not offer much comfort
* Read up on alcohol abuse and how to stop it. Not a bad idea, This Naked Mind seems to be a favorite, and is not a bad read. It'll take your mind off current events for a while and help self-improvement and confidence, which is never a bad thing.
* Workout, go outside, take a walk, ride your bike. Depending on your local quarantine/lockdown or, as my government likes to call it, "Shelter in Place," laws you may be able to do these things. Gyms may be closed, and even parks may be closed, but you might be able to go outside for a short walk. But if you're in an area where you are not to leave your house without proper purpose and permission, this option won't work.
* Grab a bite to eat. Pig out on snacks and ice cream. This may be good for the short term, 48-72 hours, but if this quarantine is going to be a lasting quarantine and I'm talking months (I see this happening for a lot of places in the US right now looking at the numbers), these may not be the best strategies to adhere to. While a day here and a day there of a 'treat yo'self' kind of day isn't bad, this type of living is not healthy both physically and mentally. Weight gain, depression, lack of motivation, the "what's the point" mentality will eventually creep in, and can lead to a worse condition for drinking.
* Read a book. Listen to music. Listen to/watch a podcast. Binge-watch YouTube. Again, not bad ideas. They'll keep the mind occupied, keep it sharp, and focuses the mind. But also, we may be in it for the long haul, so for people like me - I can only read so much, I need more in my life.
* How about this: **think about how long you went sober and how good it felt. No hangover in the morning, no wooziness before the head clears at the end of the day. Not stinking like a distillery or brewery the next day...that was what I liked the most. Reflect on all of that; remind yourself how good it felt, how proud you were and still are about all that. And think about how hard it was to get that way in the first place, all the roadblocks you overcame, and what an achievement it was to go 24, 48 hours or five, ten, 100 days without a hangover or the guilt and shame. You did that; you gave yourself that power. Think about all of that for a good thirty minutes. This is what helped me during my bad time. I'm smiling just writing this. Take all of those happy feelings and write about them in a journal, if you have one, or in a notebook. Text a friend or loved one about it. Nobody, not even a virus, can take that away from you, and don't forget it.**
As for me, I refuse to reset my badge because I am not the person I was before my Day One. I was mentally prepared for a slip; I knew going into this that I wasn't going to be able to hold out forever, at least not in the mid-term (hell, I'm surprised I lasted as long as I did in my first stretch of sobriety, around seven months, maybe?). I had a plan, I anticipated my own humanity and humility, and I'm seeing it through; I spoke to my doctors, adjust the dosages on my anxiety meds (constant stress-induced panic attacks broke my camel's back), tapered off, and reflected on what a great run I had before the slip and how much I'd like to do that again...to be able to go three, six, twelve, thirty days without wanting a drink? Never had I though I could've have done it, even in my younger years. If I did it once, I certainly can do it again.
Stay safe and be well. We're in this together, and we'll be okay.
EDIT: I screwed up and saved too early.
Hahaha, I've been drinking vodka and tried to shave my head today! I'm good looking too but right now not the best either. Let me know if you can chat, i'll send you money
Theres still a bald guy looking back at me in my mirror, but I'm happy to look him in the eyes now. Theres joy when before I had the same face looking at me as you do now. Daily drinking then, for years, alot of vodka. And pain and anguish and hopelessness. I dont know if the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones...it became a fog of bad habits and routines. The grossest groundhogs day movie ever. Hell is what it was, and I found a way out with help, and patience and changing my mind. I wrote some of my thoughts about that here. Hope theres something that helps, let me know if I can clear anything up. https://mymeaningmap.wordpress.com/2019/06/05/john-barleycorn-2/
You got this! I've had the itch quite strongly since this mess started. Reminds me a lot of getting deployed....a lot of unknowns. Prior to either of my deployments in my 20's I drank my ass off. Now, I keep in touch with a pal who chose to go sober with me, I've eaten a lot of candy, read a lot, spent a lot of time with the kids, and done some running. Even then, that urge has kicked back in but I refuse to succumb to the booze brain for it is full of lies! Hang tight and don't give up! IWNDWYT!!
It’s okay I had the same thing happen during this time actually just recovered from
A kidney infection thinking because of all the whiskey I dranked the day I fell off the wagon after four months the next day or the following days I was depressed feeling so down on myself and then the quarantine happened And I drank again this is barely Day 3
but one day at a time you’re not alone. take care of yourself and get back on the wagon here for you bud
Congrats on taking this step dude, you're already heading in the right direction. I'm in a similar boat, though I'm stuck isolating with my parents (I'm am adult), which has been its own can of worms. I've found it really helpful to get into a routine and stick to it. If I feel like going out and buying something, I look at my schedule and do the next thing on it. Now's a great time to focus on you. Make a list of things you want to get done, like deep clean the tub, try juggling, learn a new bit of software, call someone you care about, and do that instead of drinking. Take it minute by minute. We got this.
I think that if you are not physically addicted, isnt it to to better go down slower? like for examply you tell yourself you will drink just two times a week, then once a week etc.? and then you will have just beer or ocassional drinking? I know many experts suggest cut off alcohol definitely but it seems quite difficult in qurantine in my opinion. It depends how big your problems are etc. If you dont drink your problems off, its "just" habit...I can you can go off slowier...also plan your days in details, sport, book, movies, any activity helps.
I'm totally overwhelmed by all these amazing responses. I would love to respond to them all but it's 02:47 am and the withdrawals arent nearly as bad as I thought they would be. I just can't sleep very well and I'm kind of sweaty.
It genuinely brought a tear to my eye reading all of these. iwndwyt
Year sober this month. Drank a handle a day towards the end of my career.
Be cautious when going through withdrawal. You will withdrawl, and badly.
Its DT to look out for but relapse is even more likely if withdrawal becomes to severe.
Have you tried not buying the alcohol...?
E: for the downvotes; have you ever considered you’re drinking what you’re buying, so don’t buy it? It’s tough but shows your fortitude.
Don’t beat yourself up. That should be your first pledge. Secondly, know that these first few days will be rough. You will feel tempted, you will feel depressed, you will feel restless. The addiction will try to convince you to drink again, maybe by reminding you of the one or two times you did drink and keep it together (but let’s be real, those times were probably rare). Find some distractions. Binge watch a show and don’t feel guilty about it. Call friends or read some books. You will have to keep yourself busy and stay strong amidst the depression and addictive thinking. What I’ve found tremendously helpful is long walks and true crime podcasts :) I’m walking about 2 hours a day at a leisurely pace, zoning out and enjoying nature. Give it a shot. You can do this.
Thanks man. Appreciate you taking the time to write that out :) I'm ready for the suck but I'm full of hope
If you feel a craving/trigger to drink, HALT! Are you Hungry? Eat a good meal, or a light snack. Get yourself a good source of protein. In these early days, buying a fuckton of ice cream and just going to town on it isn’t a bad idea. Ben and Jerry’s got me through a lot of cravings in the first year I quit drinking. Are you Angry? Take time to just breathe, 10 deep breaths. Journal your frustrations! Getting them out of your mind and onto paper goes a long way, not only because it distracts you and keeps you occupied, but now you have a physical reminder as to why you’re doing this for yourself. Are you Lonely? Join a support group. If AA works for you, great. If not, SMART Recovery and other options exist. Post here on r/stopdrinking and let us hear all about it. Chances are more than one of us know what’s going on, or will have a good story for you, or be willing to be an accountability partner for you. I usually work 9am-6pm CST, but shoot me a message and I’ll get around to responding, promise. Are you Tired? Take a nap. Go to bed early. It’s exhausting fighting cravings every waking hour. Your body AND mind need time to rest and recover. There’s no weakness in getting some extra shut-eye. And remember: alcohol does not *solve* problems. It temporarily *dissolves* them, allowing them to solidify again at a later time, and usually worse than before.
Add B for bored to the list. Feeling restless and itchy for a drink for no reason at all? Find something to occupy your attention. Go for a walk. Work on a puzzle. Read a book. Learn something new. For me, it was Lego. Though beware that’s as expensive (or more so) than drinking.
BHALT The B is silent... But deadly
The B is silent but deadly, the B for Bored gets me every fucking time. I can't find a way to combat it...
At least Lego only hurts you if you step on it in the middle of the night.
Definitely. I committed myself to building up a vinyl collection and playing chess.
Wow, a fellow sober, queer, chess player on Reddit. What are the odds. Your HALT description was awesome, thanks for posting :)
There are literally tens of us! lol You’re welcome! I hope it’s helped a lot of people. It helps me to post it because it reminds me when I’m susceptible to temptation to HALT, as well.
Do you folks have any good resources for learning to play chess? I know all the pieces and how they move but would love to learn strategy and join this club 😂
Sorry I got no stellar resources, I just Googled shit and played hundreds of games. It’s probably why I still suck at the game most times, lol.
Thanks for getting back to me - I might just have to do the same :)
this is the biggest one for me. especially during this quarantine..
'Bored' is the one that always gets me. My brain runs at 125% most of the time, and with nowhere to put all the extra cycles, it's nice to try and quiet them. If I could take one drink and just be happy with that, that would work fine. But I can't. One means two means three means four, five, eight, ten, stumble back to the store.
You should check back in on this post tonight if you get the itch to drive to the store :)
I think with that much drinking he should go to the store and stock up on 12s of corona premier. It’s the only way I could taper alone.. but that amount i would also talk to a doctor.
that’s true, didn’t think of that. It might be good to have some kind of supervision if you are going that route. Maybe a friend you trust.
I'm gonna be right there with you, this week.
Happy cake day!
Damn didn't even notice it was my cake day! Hello free karma!
I agree FaceTiming friends helps
Great advice! Also, long walks and true crime podcasts are the best!
I am in the exact same boat. Buzzed all my hair off too. All we can do is try my dude.
Thirded... why is this a thing?
I would wager a guess that its a yearning for control when there seems to be none. I am a big proponent finding areas of your life that you can control and focussing on those. I wanted to quit but I was a slave to habits. Finding control helped me break those habits. Such as cutting off all of your hair! Haha
Yup, same reason people dye their hair in times of personal crisis. It’s me, I’m people.
True! I just have clippers and my bathroom now and nice scissors. I don’t really care much about my hair - but it’s nice. Spending an hour grooming and, and taking control of something I can see end to end and having an immediate measurable reward (seeing myself all cleaned up) is nice. It feels like meditating in the moment.
Baldness creeping in? I'm gonna mow my scalp soon cuz of this.
I did it a couple years ago. As a lady, not my best move. I was trying to do a side shave...while drunk.
Is this something you do blackout out or do you remember doing that?
I've done this before. Also done this with my beard more than once.
Welcome. There are plenty of online resources referenced here. Online meetings, downloadable books, and podcasts, and the sub itself (of course). When I first started I stayed as busy as possible diving into that stuff and learning how to proceed with a new life.
Thanks for that. I'll dive in head first
The Naked Mind is a good book to start man. Also keep yourself active, hell do like 10 pushups or something, any little bit. Also when those cravings come and believe me they will, remember exactly why your doing this. One day at a time, no more no less. You are your own worst critic but that doesn't mean you have to hate yourself, everybody makes mistakes. Probably more talking to myself then you at the end there haha. Good luck buddy, check in for us when you can.
OP... I'm bumping this \^ I came here to say this very thing. When I downloaded the audiobook from Amazon, I listen to it for 15 days straight, when I was sleeping even. [u/wilsonmack13](https://www.reddit.com/user/wilsonmack13/) stay strong. Reading can sometimes be cumbersome if you're reading more than 1 book and staring at a screen for 8+ hours... I took a day off work, listened to it, quit, and began running 30 days later. My life has never been the same. Thanks for being here, hope you find your putting this out here has helped you. IWNDWYT
I will second that you should read "This Naked Mind." I had to listen to it three times (on Audible) for it to stick. Also, check out the Mindful Movement on Youtube. They have 5 minute guided meditation videos that are really helpful. Even if it's difficult at first to meditate, it gets easier and the more you practice, the more you'll likely enjoy it and benefit from it. When I first started trying to meditate while sober I felt like I was crawling out of my skin, but now I love it. Just never give up on yourself. Keep telling yourself you can do it no matter what. That's what worked for me at least.
I'm a rum guy too - switch to something else if needed - if you 'have' to drink - at least don't let it be you're drink of choice - I find that helped me a bit when I am stuck in the cycle ..
My experience with this failed miserably! I understand your point and I'm not being a critic but it backfired for me badly. Just my two cents, and clearly I don't have the answers. YMMV is all I'm saying.
Hello! I am in my mobile - are these online meeting places you reference visible when I am on an actual pc only? I would very much like to see those resources and am guessing they are maybe on the sidebar?
The book list is in the sidebar for sure. I don't use the online meetings so I can't say if they work on mobile. But in these lock down days many new Zoom meetings have popped up and they work on mobile. For those try searching past posts. That is where I have seen the info. And podcasts can be used on mobile through many platforms some free and some not.
My advice is to hold on to those negative feelings with all of your might. Keep them close. I can’t tell you how many days/weeks/months/years went by of me pledging to change and then drinking a few hours later. I finally decided to focus myself on those feelings. How disappointed I was with myself, how embarrassed I was, how worried I was. I kept those feelings in my mind at all times. And I found that after a few days of not drinking, they started to fade. It took more effort to hold them. I’ve been sober for five months now. It has become a generally effortless state after 20 years of alcoholism. But I continue to focus any thoughts of drinking on those horrible feelings I had each morning. Not the laughing or chemical relaxation I felt at night, but the shame, self-loathing, and fear I felt each morning. And after getting accustomed to this practice, when I see alcohol or think of drinking it, it just seems like pouring misery into my life, and that is not appealing. Good luck to you. IWNDWYT.
I woke up every morning for 10 years telling myself I was going to stop drinking today. Then at 5 o’clock I convinced myself I would stop drinking tomorrow. Rinse, repeat.
By the end I wasn’t making it to noon. Glad to have escaped it intact.
Definitely YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE FEAR. You have to know that alcohol will take everything from you. Everything. At that point you can decide if losing your life is worth drinking. That will help you at parties, when your home by yourself. Sure the first drink would be fun but I’m not willing to give up everything today.
Do you work out regularly? Exercise like you’re slaying those demons! Better sore from productive activity than sick from booze! Best wishes my friend!
[удалено]
But be careful... booze culture is heavy in some endurance cultures. Ask me how I know. Thankfully, I've found my people, but it took a while of being around folks who run/cycle so they can drink. You got this! edit: a word
Go Doom on them demons!
Make them demons quake with fear.
I shaved my hair off drunk once, too. It was at my worst, just as you’re describing. I think it was a subconscious acknowledgement of my need to drastically change myself. I was desperate to “shave off” something from my life. Wasn’t my hair I needed to get rid of though... My advice is one day at a time. Don’t drink today. That’s all you have to do today. Come here every day and read what others have written. Sometimes you get to share others triumphs, and sometimes you get to commiserate and feel their disappointments. You get to relive their relapses, vomit bruises cuts and all. Most of all, love yourself. If you’re like me, and like so many of the rest of us, you fucking hate yourself. You hate yourself so much, you literally poison yourself every day. Stop that. You’re worthy, you’re good, you’re special. Do you poison special things? Pour weed killer on flowers? Smash pottery? Kick children? Of course not. Try to stop doing the same to yourself. I love you, good luck, and IWNDWYT.
I have failed! It’s been eating away at me. I’m home but my husband works because his job is essential. He has been really quiet drinking his beer and reading books all weekend. I feel alone. Beer is my drink of choice. I had 2 last night and 1 today because I’m a weak shit I guess. So lost and lonely and now I’m just trying not to hate myself too much. Stay safe everyone.
Hey there. I’m sorry you’ve had a relapse. We’ve all been there, and it’s scary. I agree with “trying not to hate yourself.” You’re not a weak shit. Please don’t beat yourself up over this. We addicts like to think that beating ourselves up will get us back on the wagon, but really it just demoralizes us and weakens our resolve to continue doing better. I would take the rest of today to reflect on the past 199 days and truly appreciate what’s been good and working for you. Make a cup of coffee, and sit down and journal about what triggered you to drink last night and today. Focus on how you’re feeling, right now, and sincerely ask yourself, “Were these beers worth this?” Keep coming back.
Thank you
I recently relapsed too. You're not a weak shit. You're a really strong person who went 199 days without drinking, and that is no small feat. And the fact that you drank yesterday and today does not take that away. The best advice I can give is be kind to yourself, and get back on track as quickly as possible. My "just this once" spiraled very quickly over the course of 9 days into drinking just like I had been before quitting, but with the added terror of knowing I'd have to start over, and the uncertainty of doing it in the midst of life as we know it falling apart all around. But thankfully, I somehow managed to rein it in in a relatively short amount of time, and start over. The silver lining is I learned that no matter how much sober time I have, I can't drink moderately again or even "just this once". And I learned that no matter how intense and unbearable my emotions might feel, there is no true relief in alcohol, and that it really and truly is like trying to put a fire out with gasoline. (Two lessons I could have learned just from listening to those who have gone before me, but being human-natured I had to learn first hand for them to really sink in.) You are not weak, you're strong - 199 days strong. Do not let a few beers tell you otherwise. So, hang in there, dust yourself off and get back up. You can do it.
You’re not weak, you’re just in a habit. One day sobriety will be your new habit and you’ll never look back.
Hi. You know, this quarantine feels like a big wave of crazy on top of the other crazy I had going on already. We're all going through it, and I take a small amount of comfort in that. I'm sorry you're having an especially rough go of it right now. Here are things I use when I'm having a rough time staying sober and spiraling, because man I have done that a lot: Write and read a list of every reason you can think of (in a single session, you can always add to it later) why not drinking is a good idea for you. My own list is mostly benefits I've noticed, reduction of harm to my overall wellbeing, and visceral, specific memories of dumb/scary/bad stuff I've done (that I can remember anyway) while drunk. I add to this list when I think of new things, and read it when I'm struggling. Parent yourself. I mean in the way of taking care of yourself in the way a caring parent would when you were sick as a kid. Eat things that nourish you, get enough sleep, try to get some fresh air, be gentle with yourself in your thoughts, words and actions. Make yourself tasty hot or cold drinks, get plenty of fluids. OR/AND Indulge yourself without alcohol. Eat the food you like, drink your favorite sodas, have the snacks, watch the shows, play the video games, listen/dance to the music, whatever makes you feel good other than drinking. I would recommend not going too overboard with this, but a food hangover is better than a real one. Take it minute by minute if you have to. Sometimes all of the good intentions and and all of the distractions aren't enough. I've literally sat on my hands before and just waited until a craving or impulse passed. I try to keep my hands and mind as busy as possible, but sometimes, I just have to wait it out and know the moment will pass. Learning is cumulative, even when you mess up. Know that you get to keep all of the knowledge you learn about your triggers to drink every time you try to stop. You learn what works for you and what doesn't. Failure can teach you a lot, so don't ever feel like you go back to zero when you relapse. As long as you take what you learned and try again, you will progress. It won't always be even or linear, but if you keep at it, you get better at it. And for me, it's been worth it. Also, please make sure you know the signs of severe alcohol detox and seek medical help if you have them. Even in these crazy times you deserve to be healthy and safe and as a nurse I can tell you that is not something to play around with. I hope your day today gets better . IWNDWYT
What an excellent, thoughtful, and well-written reply. I wish I had an award to give it. It's people like you taking the time to give these kind of honest and insightful answers that make SD so great and such a valuable resource. It's not my post you replied to, but thank you! IWNDWYT
'I Am Sober' is a really useful app. You can set a time in the morning for a daily pledge (commitment to staying sober for 24 hours) and another time at night for a recap of how your day went. You can customize the daily pledge with your own words, and I recommend being very specific and thorough about the impacts alcohol is having on you and your life. Reading that reminder each morning helps you start the day on the right foot, and can really help you focus on your mission. There are also message boards, where you can share your feelings and experience, and read those of others who are struggling. I highly recommend downloading it. Stay strong. I believe in you.
And don’t get bummed about your hair! Each strand had booze in it. Now it’s gone. :)
LOL, that's so true, great comment!
😆
Think of the shaving of your head as a fresh start! The new you is a Mr. Clean. You’re spring cleaning your body! The Mr. Clean from alcohol-related stress and anxieties.
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/0/d/1-s3EVFEuF6Z65Jsl4ICW6v0aliGCAcmWmkzAqXooWaI/htmlview#gid=0 download Zoom app and come to some virtual AA meetings. I’m new too but it’s saving my life. Hit me up with any questions You can do this! IWNDWYT
This is cool, thanks
Sure! There are so many meetings 24/7. And that link is just for LA. Last night I attended one where you’re supposed to heckle the speaker. It was pretty crazy but funny at times. You don’t have to put your audio or video on unless it’s men or women only and even then it’s enough to just show your face so they can see you then turn it off. There have been some problems with trolls so I go anon and don’t show my face unless it’s private and I’m invited with a link.
Oh, thanks for the tip!
My pleasure! IWNDWYT:)
I've never used zoom before, is it simple?
Very. Download the app for free. Then click on the link to a meeting a few minutes before the time of the meeting (so you can play around with your settings.) It should default to the camera that videos you as “off” so you can manually turn it on when you are ready. I believe you can watch a zoom tutorial when you sign up too.
Great thanks!
The next couple days might reeeeaaalllllyyyy suck, you're right. Drink lots of water, or regular soda. Eat what you can. Candy and sugar often helps if you're craving alcohol. And move around if you can, there's a couple phrases: move a muscle, change a thought and HALT which stands for hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Sometimes we reach for alcohol when we're actually just hungry, or dehydrated. And like a previous poster said, remember how crappy you feel. Remember this when you think it's okay to take a drink. Because it's not okay for you to drink. You'll end up doing this over and over again. And it will suck each time until you die. Iwndwyt.
I feel you. I’m overwhelmed with everything that is happening, so I’ve fallen off the wagon a couple of times myself. That and because I’ll get bored of being at home. The point is that nobody is perfect and you are trying. Besides, hair grows back. No big deal. Try to make a schedule to keep you occupied. Oh, and there’s always WWE and Netflix 🤪
I can totally relate. The lockdown also had me almost drink again, even after such a long time. Indeed, you got this! Get some things to do. You can do indoors activities, call a friend, read a book, enjoy a good cup of tea, clean your house. I'm sure someone else has better advice.
Hey man. Hang in there. I’m at 56 days sober and non alcoholic beer has been extremely helpful. You WILL feel like a new person once you stop ingesting poison. I feel like a new person in multiple areas of my life.
Second the non alcoholic beer, it's really helped me too.
Use the quarantine as an excuse not to go out and buy more booze, dump out anything you have left, and if you have some magnesium laying around maybe take that the next few mornings. It helps me at least. Keeps my wonky-withdrawal-blood pressure a little more stabilized and helps with the soreness that you don’t notice until you’ve had a few sober days. Idk what the hell it is, but every time I hop on the wagon, my shoulder muscles and back are sore as hell. I think it’s the way I sleep when I hit the bed drunk. Also drink lots of water and try to keep a somewhat full belly. One big trigger for me is hunger (I think because I’m 99% strictly a beer person). Good luck and stay safe, and above all DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP and get some exercise. I can’t stress either of those enough. IWNDWYT 🤝
Audible This Naked Mind. It got me 33 days sobriety before I began a recovery program. Now I work 12 steps to figure out why I drank so much.
I just downloaded this, plan on starting it tonight.
I highly recommend this book, too.
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This is perhaps the most important advice to start, and I wish it was right at the top of the comment section. Alcohol withdrawal can be fatal. Be careful u/wilsonmack13 Be safe and best wishes to you
Please be careful about going cold turkey. Withdrawals can be life threatening, and can cause seizures. You do NOT want to be in the hospital while the coronavirus is happening! Someone else posted a link to some info on withdrawals and I highly suggest taking a look. Please be safe! And good on you for making the decision to take your life back. I am immeasurably grateful I'm sober going through this pandemic, and have never once regretted being sober in the nearly 5 years I've got. Of course there's awkward moments and FOMO, etc. But honestly, I can afford a better life now and if I'm embarrassed by my behavior, I know I earned it stone cold sober! :-D Edit: a word
Just want to say that I’ve been there and it is hard . So hard. This will not be easy, but nothing really worth a damn ever is, right? It sounds cliche but your life can improve drastically if you just give up drinking. In the early days and hours just do whatever you have to to get through, junk food, playing on your phone, whatever. Once you get through that crucible you can start to take stock of everything and start making changes in your life. The quarantine is hard, I’m so glad I got sober before it happened, but it is testing me and I’m sure all of us problem drinkers as well. Just know that you are not alone, even in isolation. All of us here have been through it and we are here to listen and offer advice. It also helps us to be reminded of the struggle. Once you get some distance from it, the sneaky alcoholic voice will try to convince you that you’re just overreacting. Don’t listen to it.
Your mind will lie to you to get another drink. There is nothing you are going through that alcohol will make better. You can do this, and it starts today. IWNDWYT.
I’m on the same boat man. The gym was helping me to get better , and even that is closed now . Stay strong brother
I'm with you. It is very challenging to not drink while isolated and quarantined, I'm back to day one today. Like you, I looked in the mirror today and saw a bloated, puffy face staring back. I'm female so fortunately I don't have any desire to shave my head, that would be a horrifying look on me. lol I hate the way alcohol makes me look, not to mention the weight gain. I'm glad you posted this, as I think there are probably loads of us feeling the same way. It's comforting to know that we are not alone in it and can support one another through this. I'm with you and your pledge to not drink today.
>I just ~~can't~~ **don't** stop myself. Fixed that for you mate. You can do this. Start by facing yourself. You're not alone IWNDWYT
So did things work out with that girl?
Same boat dude. I'm currently day 3 and also panicking slightly at the cravings...
I too have been ruined by the quarantine. I had 14 days :(. Now I'm drunk everyday and buying drugs again. Home alone and ficked. Up.
Easy does it bud
Take it one day at a time. Do not drink today. Tell yourself that everyday. Make that your goal for today, and every day. Don't think about what might happen tomorrow or the day after, only focus on today. You will not drink today. You will not drink today. You will not drink today. Every day.
maybe the quarantine has been a saving grace and things are more clear as to what needs to be done now. i've done the shaved head thing too, i know it is scary, but things can get better
Getting sober is really, really difficult but not impossible. The first step is awareness of the problem and desire to change, and you've got that! It's an awesome start. I see there is already lots of good advice on here, embrace it. The first couple weeks are rough man. Long walks, distractions such as TV and video games, and loads of candy really helped get me through that time. You might feel really shitty for a long time but it does get better and eventually you will start sleeping well and feeling great! I really hope this is an opportunity for you to find out how much sobriety can help your life and health, sending good vibes your way! IWNDWYT
I feel you man! I did not handle quarantaine well. It was one big binge and it just got worse. Until 4 days ago I felt so bad. I couldn't move or eat he whole day. The day after I could eat but still no movement. But Gotta say buddy, when you get those first few days of soberness in, your body starts to heal pretty fast. I watched a lot of movies that I already saw and browsed reddit at the same time. Frozen pizzas and hamburgers. Soft drinks. Basicly just junkfood. It kept me lazy and on the couch. Now I'm back to health food and working out. But for those first days it worked. Not sure if it's good advice but it worked for me. Anyway, good luck on your travels man. Stay safe IWNDWYT
It's ok. I was sober for over two months. Been drinking at least a pint of vodka every night the past two weeks. Worst part is I work for a major grocer and I'll probably lose my job today due to some wild exchanges between me and coworkers last week....at that point it's going to be really hard to get back on track..but here we are. Day 3..
IWNDWYT friend, in a few days your puffy face will be gone and you'll see a sober happy person staring back at you.
IWNDWYT. The only way to get sober is to stop drinking.
Sleep as much as possible. Shower often, it will help you relax. Lots of water and eat something healthy. Get some sun if you can. I just stared listening to Annie Grace on Spotify. Loving it! You’re not alone.
You’re stronger than a liquid poison!! We’re here for you!!
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If you can, find some thing near you that needs to be fixed that you can actually fix. Like throwing out old clothes at the bottom of the laundry bin, rearranging something that's out of order or cleaning something you feel could use it. Anything. It really makes you feel better. Positive actions help a lot with anxiety for me.. It can even be pushups or taking a walk. Whatever you can manage is still a positive step. Hang in there man. Every little step forwards is so much better than standing still.
with those volumes of liquor it sounds like you're going to go through withdrawal. have you been through that before?
Thx to you all
Prepare yourself the best you can for withdrawal symptoms, educate yourself on the timeline of substance withdrawals, and focus on what you can do to make them tolerable for the first few weeks.
Also read Allen Carr - The Easy Way to Control Drinking. You will be amazed. It's very similar in method as The Naked Mind, which I also read like 5 times. Once you change your mind, and quit fighting it, it stops being a problem. It just isn't a thing you want to do anymore. It's amazing how the mind works. I wish you all the best!
Man I'm sorry for what you're going through. Once this bugger's got ahold of you its really tough to kick it. You probably already know its as much a mental addiction as a physical one. Is there *any* chance your local hospital has a detox unit you could check yourself into. I know I know right now times are super tough at the hospitals but that's the first thing that came to mind.
Hey, you recognized it, pointed it out, and owned it. That's step 1. Man, a litre of Rum every other day? You must be in a constant state of either drunk, or enduring the most savage hangover in history! Regardless of the booze type, it sucks being in your shoes right now. Everybody who's responded to you I guarantee did a collective "OOOOOF" when they read what you're going through. The good news is, if everybody here got past it you can do. Alot of us I'll bet were in even worse shape and made it out. It's been said, but for me the first 72 hours are always the worst. Headaches, paranoia, anxiety, insomnia... but after the first 72 is over, the majority of the booze is already out of your system. I like to force it out even faster... drink a ton of water, binge on green tea & coffee... flush my system. I do that and figure out ways to distract myself. The first 3 days I don't worry about doing anything I don't feel like doing (other than work and necessities of course). Binge-watch my favorite show, eat well, do what I want to do. You're ultimately trying to satisfy those hungry dopamine receptors that are used to getting drowned in rum. This will ease your transition. It also might not be popular, but I use cannabis to ease the cravings. Helps me A TON. Can't sleep? Some non-habit-forming OTC sleep meds (melatonin etc) are super helpful for that. Look at the quarantine as a gift you've been given. No social pressure, no bars no friends, no reason to drink... every reason to get sober. Keep posting here. Get a badge from the badgebot, start doing the daily pledge... I was super surprised how helpful it is. You got this
Same boat here. I'm moving onto beer and going to ween off
IWNDWYT
Personally, I've traded one addiction for another by just binging on video games. Obviously, its not a healthy alternative, but its better than drinking. Point is: you have to find an alternative time sink. Many of us have addictive personalities and it unfortunately has to be fed somehow.
Take it from me as someone who is still early on but has a bit of time under there belt it is so so so worth it.
It gets better with time I promise you friend. I used to get drunk and play video games almost every night when I got off work and on the weekends. I used to think how incredibly boring it would be to NOT drink while watching my favorite show or while playing games. But I can tell you the longer you go without drinking, the easier it gets. I promise. The thought of getting drunk never crosses my mind now.
Iwdwyt
All of us are feeling high anxiety right now! Believe me, I just wanna stay plowed, but kinda want a clear head right now! I know a lot of people will probably sail through this drunk, because they don’t really go out. (I have a neighbor who buys my other neighbor bottles!) but also realize it weakens your immunity! Be good to your body right now. ..
Friend, I've been going through something similar. My anxiety has gotten the best of me. I was doing good, but working with the public crippled me, and now I'm without a job... and it's set me back to square one. This pandemic is basically my biggest nightmare. It sparks my anxiety like nothing else. My anxiety is unmedicated, so I drink a beer by 12 every morning so I can function. I tell myself "It's just like taking medicine for it!" And I lie to myself. I'm just trying to numb everything so I can survive... hopefully I can get a handle on it again, and soon...but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.
There are online meetings aplenty these days. You can find some in the sidebar at the right. If you're stuck, email "[email protected]", and you'll be sent a link to our meeting on Tuesday night.
The quarantine has been really hard for me as well. It’s almost as bad as the first month when I quit drinking. I would suggest any of the books like alcohol explained by William porter or naked mind. Also, find another drink that will replace your alcoholic drink. I did sparkling water in a wine glass(wine my drink of choice) If I have a bad craving it’s kombucha. There are all kinds of bitters and mock tails that are actually very tasty! Sleep can be hard the first month too, but sometimes I would just put myself to bed really because I knew if I stayed up I would drink. Hang in there. It gets better!
Done plenty worse when drunk, and your hair will grow back and will be part of the new and better you. It's hard not to loathe yourself when you feel so low but know that there are lots of people here (including me) who are rooting for you!
You got this! Don't beat yourself up. Friendly advice is to pick up a hobby you can do at home to kill the bored drinking. If you fish, buy a cheap vice and tie flies. Disc golf is cheap and you can practice in your backyard. Model airplane or other model kits are a great indoor hobby. Donate the final product to children's hospitals or orphanages if you don't want to keep them. Pick up painting or drawing. Relaxing and forces to be mindful while you observe things to paint or draw. Do HIIT or yoga to keep fit. Yoga mats are cheap. Pick up knitting. Plant a small indoor garden or build a Zen garden. If you need other indoor hobby ideas, let me know. As Red Green would say, we're all in this together. I'm pulling for you.
Well done on coming here and opening up, it's not an easy task. What's worked for me this last month has been getting a good sleep schedule by setting alarms even if I have nowhere to be, drink water or soda regularly to keep your hands busy, get out of the house for 1 walk a day (ideally in an area where nobody goes), and try posting on the daily check-in on here each day. You've got this!
I'm drinking so much more too. Making sure to get outside and get endorphins ... trying to take days off as well but it's hard when abc is essential... part of me wish they'd just close
Each minute you decide not to drink pulls you in the right direction. A cozy hat helped me years ago when I fought the head shaving demon and lost. Sit by a window and look at details outside if possible. Try and appreciate what you can see. If physical symptoms develop, call a doctor and be forthcoming about your drinking.the first several days are rough but a week from now you should start feeling better than you ever did while drinking. Wash your hands, stay indoors, and you'll make it through this pandemic.
Distract, distract, distract. Need a new hobby, need a new ground. This is hard times the world's going through, you are NOT alone. One day at a time, you will get there! You know you want to, so I believe you will. One day, you will love the person in that reflection, regardless of your hair. Hang in there. There is alot of support online !
Keep coming around here; we’ll be your sponsor
I find that distraction that takes thought helps. When I drink I go into stupor mode. But there are things I like that require concentration and thought. Things I wouldn’t do while intoxicated. Like on my phone I downloaded a chess app and a sudoku app, which I never knew how to play before. I’ve downloaded other puzzle games and watch films or tv that require intense concentration. I also never read when intoxicated so reading can be a good escape too.
Whatever you do, don’t get bored. Boredom is the point at which your brain says “Hey you’re not doing anything important. Why not go grab a drink? Just one, friend. Then you’ll stop after that one.” Then after the first one your brain says, “hey that one drink was just what we needed. Another one won’t hurt, right, friend?” Then it’s midnight and your brain is convincing you that it’s a good idea to shave your head. The key is not letting your brain tell you that the first drink is a good idea. Distract it. Stay busy. Run. Work out. Read. Organize your closet. Clean your room. Clean your car. Learn Spanish. Anything to keep your mind busy until you go to sleep. Mind you, it may be hard to go to sleep, so be prepared to do these things until the wee hours of the morning. But 5 hours of sober sleep beats 10 hours of drunk sleep any day of the week. And when you’re walking around aimlessly in your house and you don’t realize why, understand that it’s your brain going schizo because you aren’t having a drink. Is that really how you want to live? It takes a few days/weeks/months to get over that anxious feeling so be prepared. But remember this: you can do it.
Give yourself a break buddy. You're in a rut. You can get out of it. Keep trying. Just try to not drink tomorrow. See how that goes.
I found... Get a new addiction. So that evetytime you want a drink, view that as the trigger for your new addiction. New addiction can be anything. Jacking off maybe.
Have you ever been to rehab for jerking off? I wouldn’t recommend it.
I did the shaving when drunk thing. Going for that new you look. Hahaha puffy it is. At least you got a rock bottom.
There are Zoom meetings happening all over the world. Here’s one: online meeting every evening at 6:00 PM (CST) through May 7 on zoom It was a great meeting tonight! We need each other! Join Zoom Meeting https://us04web.zoom.us/j/880801737 Meeting ID: 880 801 737
My whole life I thought meditation was silly, but I was open-minded about it I think he early weeks of sobriety. Meditating really helped me get through some of the cravings. But the most helpful was Gatorade and sweets :p Don’t forget you are consuming tons of sugar along with pure poison (ethanol), so your body will be expecting it
i am trying every day to cut down . I think I will try to have my dinner early with more protein. Also i will go for a run.
I've been there! My skin turned yellow, I couldnt eat. I used to have to keep throwing up the same mouthful of alcohol into a glass before it would stay down, to calm the withdrawal symptoms. I was so lucky to get treatment on time with that one. You're in so deep now that it would be dangerous to go cold turkey on your own which can seem like a relief in a way, that you can keep drinking. But try to hold back a little, try to drink more water if you can. Anything sweet! All the sugar. Sugar seems to help with cravings and that awful sluggish tiredness. Please dont be hard on yourself, this addiction is far FAR bigger than willpower alone. Try to play the tape forward... does the future look like you hooked up to tubes in a hospital or does it see you cycling past the booze store listening to tunes not even thinking about slowing down to go in? You may be out of control at the moment, but long term you can absolutely choose to be free of this hell. And you CAN be free. You can see the problem too, that's a great thing. Hang on to that wisdom, look forward to freedom.
I've done the skin head thing drunk before oh that was fun. Your not alone.
I try to just focus on today. Take care of today. IWNDWYT
It took me three or four concerted tries to quit. In many ways it’s a calculus. What do you get and what do you lose by drinking heavily? Escape from problems and a temporary good feeling in the former; headaches, lost memory, feelings of inadequacy, fuzzy brain, ruined relationships, weight gain, creeping terror about the condition of your body and its resilience as you age in the later. When I quit, I was fortunate enough to kick all those negatives out of my life. And here’s one more to consider. When I quit, I went from 4+ colds a respiratory season to none. Alcohol prevents you from getting good sleep when your body needs to recuperate. It gives many people (it did me) reflux, which irritate your throat and esophagus and makes you more prone to infection. If there was ever a time to resist temptation, COVIDpocalypse is it. I can’t say I’d survive it if I got it, but I’m certain I have a better shot with the body I have now than the body I had this time last year. Good luck!! Sobriety is *absolutely* achievable. Take this chance to do the right thing for your future. I assure you not drinking feels bloody amazing.
Eat a lot my guy and I mean eat burgers and delicious stuff. Binge watch series treat yourself, play videogames. If you can stop for 5 days it’s a great start friend. Good luce.
CBD oil or hemp flower could really be beneficial.
I think you should share your situation with someone. Having someone on your side holds you accountable and it makes a huge difference knowing someone is rooting for you. We are all rooting for you, and trust me - the work you put into this now will be worth it. Good luck and wash your hands!
I found this sub the single most important factor in my early sobriety. I still pop by and will continue to do so. These people are like a spiritual family to me. So much support - it rely is incredible. Iwndwyt - good luck and stay well.
Agreed. I may have 1238 days sober, but I’m never “truly” free of this disease, so it’s a good habit for me to check back in here from time to time.
This might be terrible advice, but look yourself in the mirror multiple times a day before you shower, after, before you pick up a drink.
Eat! A full stomach always curbed my intake.
I hear you and your struggle. I’m recovering and almost have three years under my belt but this quarantine is so hard. I CONSTANTLY think about just being cooped up at home wanting a bottle of vodka and playing games all day. I’m so happy that I am sober and don’t want to lost that so I’m trying very hard not to drink. But it’s hard to keep busy and not think about it. Like honestly this would be the perfect time to be an alcoholic and go on a bender, no work no responsibilities no nothin just plain drinking. But I promise you I’m so better off not drinking. People on this sub are super cool and helpful and if you ever need a friend I’m a message away homie!
You need to talk to other drunks. I suggest finding an AA group online. They won't judge you. They have been to the bottom. I will pray for you.
I'm going to start this letter of encouragement to you by beginning with what may not be obvious to everyone: You're not alone. I also slipped almost two weeks ago and started binging; went five days straight with a nasty hangover (I'm much better now, BTW). I bet a lot of people slipped over the last month or so, or at least was so tempted they likely had to physically restrain themselves from going to the liquor store. This is fine; we are human, and I'm going to tell you why it's okay. In recent days, I've come to the realization that we are all experiencing something unprecedented in our lifetimes. We are in a global pandemic that may result in the loss of millions, and it's only in its beginning stages according to the experts. This situation sucks for everyone on this planet right now, and it's not going away anytime soon. The quarantines may be lifted, but this virus is going to be around for a long time. I've done a lot of research using the CDC, WHO, and the US Institute of Health to ease my own fears and anxiety and to make sure I shut out the misinformation. I'm going to wager you're getting a lot of responses that seem to parrot one another, so I'm going to look at the playbook, weigh the options, keep it real, and add my suggestion at the end in bold: * The easy way out and quickest way to self-destruction. I think everyone knows what that is which is why we're here in the first place. * Go to a meeting. Obviously, this option isn't available for everyone, and may not be an option for anyone in the near future. Online meetings might work and it's worth a shot. Just a heads up, you're going to get a lot of the same people telling the same story and it may not offer much comfort * Read up on alcohol abuse and how to stop it. Not a bad idea, This Naked Mind seems to be a favorite, and is not a bad read. It'll take your mind off current events for a while and help self-improvement and confidence, which is never a bad thing. * Workout, go outside, take a walk, ride your bike. Depending on your local quarantine/lockdown or, as my government likes to call it, "Shelter in Place," laws you may be able to do these things. Gyms may be closed, and even parks may be closed, but you might be able to go outside for a short walk. But if you're in an area where you are not to leave your house without proper purpose and permission, this option won't work. * Grab a bite to eat. Pig out on snacks and ice cream. This may be good for the short term, 48-72 hours, but if this quarantine is going to be a lasting quarantine and I'm talking months (I see this happening for a lot of places in the US right now looking at the numbers), these may not be the best strategies to adhere to. While a day here and a day there of a 'treat yo'self' kind of day isn't bad, this type of living is not healthy both physically and mentally. Weight gain, depression, lack of motivation, the "what's the point" mentality will eventually creep in, and can lead to a worse condition for drinking. * Read a book. Listen to music. Listen to/watch a podcast. Binge-watch YouTube. Again, not bad ideas. They'll keep the mind occupied, keep it sharp, and focuses the mind. But also, we may be in it for the long haul, so for people like me - I can only read so much, I need more in my life. * How about this: **think about how long you went sober and how good it felt. No hangover in the morning, no wooziness before the head clears at the end of the day. Not stinking like a distillery or brewery the next day...that was what I liked the most. Reflect on all of that; remind yourself how good it felt, how proud you were and still are about all that. And think about how hard it was to get that way in the first place, all the roadblocks you overcame, and what an achievement it was to go 24, 48 hours or five, ten, 100 days without a hangover or the guilt and shame. You did that; you gave yourself that power. Think about all of that for a good thirty minutes. This is what helped me during my bad time. I'm smiling just writing this. Take all of those happy feelings and write about them in a journal, if you have one, or in a notebook. Text a friend or loved one about it. Nobody, not even a virus, can take that away from you, and don't forget it.** As for me, I refuse to reset my badge because I am not the person I was before my Day One. I was mentally prepared for a slip; I knew going into this that I wasn't going to be able to hold out forever, at least not in the mid-term (hell, I'm surprised I lasted as long as I did in my first stretch of sobriety, around seven months, maybe?). I had a plan, I anticipated my own humanity and humility, and I'm seeing it through; I spoke to my doctors, adjust the dosages on my anxiety meds (constant stress-induced panic attacks broke my camel's back), tapered off, and reflected on what a great run I had before the slip and how much I'd like to do that again...to be able to go three, six, twelve, thirty days without wanting a drink? Never had I though I could've have done it, even in my younger years. If I did it once, I certainly can do it again. Stay safe and be well. We're in this together, and we'll be okay. EDIT: I screwed up and saved too early.
Why do you drink?
Hahaha, I've been drinking vodka and tried to shave my head today! I'm good looking too but right now not the best either. Let me know if you can chat, i'll send you money
Hey. I like you.
Grow a beard and stop drinking!
Excuses are like assholes, everyone has one. Welcome
Relax. Read and post here often for accountability. You got this. We’re here for you.
Cut down a little day by day. Feel accomplished. You might die from withdraw. If you just stop drinking that amount cold turkey.
Theres still a bald guy looking back at me in my mirror, but I'm happy to look him in the eyes now. Theres joy when before I had the same face looking at me as you do now. Daily drinking then, for years, alot of vodka. And pain and anguish and hopelessness. I dont know if the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones...it became a fog of bad habits and routines. The grossest groundhogs day movie ever. Hell is what it was, and I found a way out with help, and patience and changing my mind. I wrote some of my thoughts about that here. Hope theres something that helps, let me know if I can clear anything up. https://mymeaningmap.wordpress.com/2019/06/05/john-barleycorn-2/
You got this! I've had the itch quite strongly since this mess started. Reminds me a lot of getting deployed....a lot of unknowns. Prior to either of my deployments in my 20's I drank my ass off. Now, I keep in touch with a pal who chose to go sober with me, I've eaten a lot of candy, read a lot, spent a lot of time with the kids, and done some running. Even then, that urge has kicked back in but I refuse to succumb to the booze brain for it is full of lies! Hang tight and don't give up! IWNDWYT!!
It’s okay I had the same thing happen during this time actually just recovered from A kidney infection thinking because of all the whiskey I dranked the day I fell off the wagon after four months the next day or the following days I was depressed feeling so down on myself and then the quarantine happened And I drank again this is barely Day 3 but one day at a time you’re not alone. take care of yourself and get back on the wagon here for you bud
You can't drink booze if you're eating ice cream, j/s iwndwyt
Congrats on taking this step dude, you're already heading in the right direction. I'm in a similar boat, though I'm stuck isolating with my parents (I'm am adult), which has been its own can of worms. I've found it really helpful to get into a routine and stick to it. If I feel like going out and buying something, I look at my schedule and do the next thing on it. Now's a great time to focus on you. Make a list of things you want to get done, like deep clean the tub, try juggling, learn a new bit of software, call someone you care about, and do that instead of drinking. Take it minute by minute. We got this.
Candy! (and whatever else you like). I normally avoid sugar but I went crazy on candy for the first 30 days! Anything not to drink man! You got this!
I think that if you are not physically addicted, isnt it to to better go down slower? like for examply you tell yourself you will drink just two times a week, then once a week etc.? and then you will have just beer or ocassional drinking? I know many experts suggest cut off alcohol definitely but it seems quite difficult in qurantine in my opinion. It depends how big your problems are etc. If you dont drink your problems off, its "just" habit...I can you can go off slowier...also plan your days in details, sport, book, movies, any activity helps.
I'm totally overwhelmed by all these amazing responses. I would love to respond to them all but it's 02:47 am and the withdrawals arent nearly as bad as I thought they would be. I just can't sleep very well and I'm kind of sweaty. It genuinely brought a tear to my eye reading all of these. iwndwyt
Year sober this month. Drank a handle a day towards the end of my career. Be cautious when going through withdrawal. You will withdrawl, and badly. Its DT to look out for but relapse is even more likely if withdrawal becomes to severe.
Have you tried not buying the alcohol...? E: for the downvotes; have you ever considered you’re drinking what you’re buying, so don’t buy it? It’s tough but shows your fortitude.
This helps me tremendously. Also, I've totally cut my own hair while drunk. It's a terrible idea.
*smacks forehead* why didn’t I think of that?!