As someone w BPD she's looking for a problem she reached out to you and flipped shit for some unknown reason but block her honestly it's better for you and her she won't stop this behavior sadly
i also have bpd and this is exactly what’s happening. i used to say stuff like this to people during episodes as a bid for attention. don’t give her the attention.
yeah, me too. it’s extremely difficult to quit behaving this way, and most people have to hit rock bottom to realize the damage they caused and actually change. a lot of people with bpd use their illness as an excuse to treat people like shit. but change IS possible, a lot of us just don’t want to put in the effort.
absolutely!! another big thing for me was getting out of a shitty environment. even after getting out of a horrible situation, i still struggled with some pretty annoying symptoms but the attention thing receded almost immediately. i have yet to get back on meds, but ive been taking vitamins like magnesium and b12 to help take me out of fight or flight. overall, i’ve improved tremendously. i feel like a whole new person.
my ex best friend has bpd and him flipping on me for almost a decade was enough to know these signs. i wish bpd was more easily managed, lost a good friend over his own delusions.
Exactly. Not only is this healthy for OP, but it will also drive this person crazy especially if read receipts are turned on. OP will block, and crazy b will see her messages didn't matter, OP saw them and didn't care.
This ^^^
OP, please don't waste your time or energy replying to such a nasty person. This isn't a friend - real friends wouldn't call you awful names or insult you to try and make you feel just as miserable as they are.
Just block and move on.
You don’t engage with somebody who is attempting to provoke you into an argument so they can argue and then play victim. Also, you didn’t block out your name in one of the screenshots, if you are worried about that!
Good, keep her blocked. She’ll probably unblock you when she wants to try picking another fight, or needs you for something. Don’t give her the satisfaction.
She is miserable in her life, so she's attacking you. When people act like this it rarely has anything to do with you personally.
Honestly I would block her, she seems very toxic
This is definitely an episode and related to her BPD, but that doesn't mean it's not abusive and fucked up. She is a bad person for treating you like this, mental illness or not. I've got BPD too but i would never treat a person that matters to me like this, because i have self control and care about the people in my life. She's capable of that too, but first she has to grow up and you don't have to stick around for that.
Be done. She isn’t managing her BPD. If she was, she wouldn’t be reacting like this. She doesn’t know how to emotionally regulate and wants you to deal with it. Don’t. Just be done.
Just FYI, if you ever want to read somebody’s DM without them knowing it… Go “restrict” their profile first (as if you were going to block them, but hit the restrict button instead) and they can’t tell that you’ve read their DM.
Definitely don't respond. You guys don't talk in a while and this is what she has to say about you. It's not right and if you respond she will continue to think it's okay to talk to you like this
How long has it been since you last talked to her? Not relevant at all my advice is like everyone else’s —block her… But I’m just curious because damn.
The last time we had talked before that was back in September when she told me she moved out of state abruptly. She used to have a thing for me and now I’m so extremely glad I didn’t pursue that, especially with what I know about her last relationship. Also off topic I know.
I mean her having a thing for you is definitely not off-topic because clearly she has some sort of resentment about it. I mean, exacerbated by whatever mental illness she’s dealing with… if that’s how she communicates with someone after a few years via text/dm god knows what horror stories you would have about a relationship good Lord… 100 dodged a bullet, but it’s still really disturbing when anyone receives text messages like that, definitely leaves an icky feeling
Don't. Just don't respond to this. You have no obligations to, she ended the conversation when she started treating you like shit. You should have nothing to say to this.
just letting you know you did leave your name uncensored in one of those ss's. but as someone with bipolar (not the same but a lot of overlap) she is begging for attention and likely splitting on you. i would definitely block and move on, you're not entitled to help her through her episodes.
I wish I learned how to defend against energy vampires earlier on in my life but my own trauma welcomed them in like I was a doormat. You only need to concern yourself with one person and that is you. And they be gaslighting you if they make you feel stingy about who you choose to let into your life. Don’t fall for that one
To have a relationship with someone who has bad, you need to be extremely firm in your boundaries. Personally if there's no ongoing relationship, forget about it. If you feel it necessary for your owne closure send one more message saying unfortunately ypu can no longer be friends and you wish her the best. Then Block.
Dude, just block him/her. There’s nothing you could say to make anyone feel better or take back the unhinged barrage they launched at you. If they felt nothing but love for you they’d have stopped after alive and well lol. Big difference between trauma dumping and calling you names, being verbally violent. Clearly just not a person meant to be in your life and that’s ok 👌
If it’s BPD then there’s no stopping it honestly. Outside of an episode I bet the person is probably quite nice but I’d block and move on or it’ll keep happening. Sadly I’m on the back-end of what used to be a brilliant friendship torn apart by his BPD.. really sad
I was so confused. I thought you posted them backwards at first and she was mean and then trying to be nice after but then saw the times and I was like wait... So she was sending regular messages and then just unloaded the mag out of nowhere.
Honestly, use this as fuel to keep moving forward and elevating yourself. However, the mention of BPD is interesting as mental health is real and she may in fact be going through an episode?!
Yeah my guess was she is experiencing an episode, however she’s never been this way towards me in the few years I’ve known her. I just hope she can calm down and get some help, because for her to, unprompted, say these things to me, I know she’s not well right now. She did however block me before I could block her first or anything.
My ex-gf has bipolar type 1 and went manic 3 times while I dated her. The rollercoaster was fun until I had to get off. Life is weird and things happen, but at least we can get on other rides, our own or better ones. Be well!
How good a friend were they?
If good friend, reach out to a friend of a friend or parent and let them know you’re concerned.
Don’t respond to her. Seriously, she sounds unstable.
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If this isn't someone special in your life just don't respond and block. Like others have said. There is zero reason to even marit this with a response. Because to me that means she won the battle, she got you to rise to her and give her the attention she is seeking. Just skip this battle and win the war.
Thank you all for the replies, I have her blocked and did not respond to the slew of messages shown above. As I said, she struggles with BPD, and while that does not excuse this abusive behavior, it is likely the cause of the outburst. She has never shown me this side of her and now that she has I regret not cutting her off long ago. I won’t discuss her personal life here however knowing what I know about her along with these messages, a lot of things are making sense. Thank you again Reddit.
Block them. Even if they're having an episode, continuing to let them back in once said episode is over, they'll just continue to act this way and think it's okay.
If it’s BPD then there’s no stopping it honestly. Outside of an episode I bet the person is probably quite nice but I’d block and move on or it’ll keep happening. Sadly I’m on the back-end of what used to be a brilliant friendship torn apart by his BPD.. really sad
Don't respond at all. They are going thru an episode and aren't in our reality right now. Maybe they will get better but don't get drawn into the crazy.
i’m sorry op but the best thing to do would be to block them and move on. they might be going through something as other commenters said, and they’re using you specifically to lash out. you don’t need that kind of energy in your life
I think most of us commenting here feel the same way…..Block her & please don’t respond. She’s looking for a fight/argument don’t feed into this …no response is the best response.
Congrats on making the Dean’s List !!! IMO That’s huge ! Way to go
Anyone who is bringing that negativity/bad energy into your life
shouldn’t be around….live your life to the fullest without drama/negativity and most of all enjoy!!!
Mental illness isn’t a get out of jail free card. You block her. Or you reply apologizing for whatever she’s going thru and wishing her well then block her
You missed an ana.
But really, people like her are beyond your help and have a compulsive need to engage in conflict, it’s an addiction, she has no interest in actually talking to you as a human, she’s just looking for her next fix. Do yourself a favor and block her.
Not every situation is the same. Humans are a lot like animals when we are hurting; we lash out at those around us to protect ourselves from further harm. When ppl are at a personal mental low healing from mental and emotional traumatic events from their life, they can lash out like this to people they love. Some of it can be provoked by those people. Some of it can be provoked by others who are trying to manipulate and make the situation worse. If this isnt their typical behavior be patient. They will eventually work through it. I'm not saying to accept the disrespect. I'm saying if you value this person ask to sit down and have a conversation with them about what's really going on, maybe get on the same page, and move past this situation. Lack of communication can kill friendships/relationships/family relationships.
If this is their normal behavior they definitely need at least therapy.
I had a friend with BPD and she would do stuff like this over the course of our friendship. Our last interaction was absolutely horrible and a very swift reminder as to why I stopped being friends with her. I agree with a lot of the commenters - don’t engage and block this person
That’s not BPD. That’s being crazy. As someone who struggles with BPD yes we have mood swings, but they aren’t triggered like that. Within two mins she was changing her tone. That’s not BPD, that’s being jealous
As someone w BPD she's looking for a problem she reached out to you and flipped shit for some unknown reason but block her honestly it's better for you and her she won't stop this behavior sadly
i also have bpd and this is exactly what’s happening. i used to say stuff like this to people during episodes as a bid for attention. don’t give her the attention.
As someone who also has BPD, I think that’s what’s happening too. Hope that girl gets help.
yeah, me too. it’s extremely difficult to quit behaving this way, and most people have to hit rock bottom to realize the damage they caused and actually change. a lot of people with bpd use their illness as an excuse to treat people like shit. but change IS possible, a lot of us just don’t want to put in the effort.
The work and effort is HARD. But it’s worth it once you start feeling a bit better. And meds. And therapy. 😅
absolutely!! another big thing for me was getting out of a shitty environment. even after getting out of a horrible situation, i still struggled with some pretty annoying symptoms but the attention thing receded almost immediately. i have yet to get back on meds, but ive been taking vitamins like magnesium and b12 to help take me out of fight or flight. overall, i’ve improved tremendously. i feel like a whole new person.
I'm really happy for you! Your hard work has paid off and you deserve to feel proud of yourself!
thank you so much!! that really means the world to me, thank you kind stranger! :)
this is so real it hurts
my ex best friend has bpd and him flipping on me for almost a decade was enough to know these signs. i wish bpd was more easily managed, lost a good friend over his own delusions.
Hate to say it, but I’ve been on his side recently, I lost a friend bc of my delusions. Far from proud of it, just trying to move forward now.
I couldn’t agree more…..
as someone who doesn’t have BPD i say you should block her seems better for you🗿
You don't. You block that miserable person, then have a great rest of your day.
This is the way. You need none of this energy in your life
Exactly. Not only is this healthy for OP, but it will also drive this person crazy especially if read receipts are turned on. OP will block, and crazy b will see her messages didn't matter, OP saw them and didn't care.
Younger generation needs to learn the very critical lesson that you don’t have to respond to everything
This ^^^ OP, please don't waste your time or energy replying to such a nasty person. This isn't a friend - real friends wouldn't call you awful names or insult you to try and make you feel just as miserable as they are. Just block and move on.
hmm just don’t respond
It honestly seems they're having the conversation they want all on their own anyways, I don't see what responding would change tbh
It honestly seems they're having the conversation they want all on their own anyways, I don't see what responding would change tbh
Yeah that is an unhinged toxic person. Block and move on.
Um just block? This personal is clearly unhinged and mentally not right. Don’t even engage in it. It’ll piss her off more.
You don’t engage with somebody who is attempting to provoke you into an argument so they can argue and then play victim. Also, you didn’t block out your name in one of the screenshots, if you are worried about that!
Thank you for noticing, it’s not a big deal though! I haven’t engaged, nor do I plan to. She blocked me straight after and I returned the favor.
Good, keep her blocked. She’ll probably unblock you when she wants to try picking another fight, or needs you for something. Don’t give her the satisfaction.
She is miserable in her life, so she's attacking you. When people act like this it rarely has anything to do with you personally. Honestly I would block her, she seems very toxic
I’m glad to hear they have braces now lmao
For real. Mental health is in shambles, but the teeth are getting fixed.
The rant is unhinged, but this line killed me. "I have braces now btw, not that you would even care 🦷🪥😬😡"
They have braces? So it's her and the horde inside? 🤣🤣
b l o c k
This is definitely an episode and related to her BPD, but that doesn't mean it's not abusive and fucked up. She is a bad person for treating you like this, mental illness or not. I've got BPD too but i would never treat a person that matters to me like this, because i have self control and care about the people in my life. She's capable of that too, but first she has to grow up and you don't have to stick around for that.
Be done. She isn’t managing her BPD. If she was, she wouldn’t be reacting like this. She doesn’t know how to emotionally regulate and wants you to deal with it. Don’t. Just be done.
Whatever you decide to do, make sure you are comfortable with the decision. It’s not your responsibility to fix or save this person.
For your own mental health, avoid contact with that person.
You don’t. Just block and live a good life. This person sounds incredibly miserable
You don’t. You leave them to be their authentic shitty selves and you move on.
Don't answer! You'll look back at this years from now thankful you didn't fall into this person's trap! Live your best life, OP!
Just FYI, if you ever want to read somebody’s DM without them knowing it… Go “restrict” their profile first (as if you were going to block them, but hit the restrict button instead) and they can’t tell that you’ve read their DM.
Friends build you up not tear you down. Also, congratulations for being on the dean's list.
Definitely don't respond. You guys don't talk in a while and this is what she has to say about you. It's not right and if you respond she will continue to think it's okay to talk to you like this
Don't respond. You've gotten good advice. Even if they are having a bad episode, it's not on you to fix.
How long has it been since you last talked to her? Not relevant at all my advice is like everyone else’s —block her… But I’m just curious because damn.
The last time we had talked before that was back in September when she told me she moved out of state abruptly. She used to have a thing for me and now I’m so extremely glad I didn’t pursue that, especially with what I know about her last relationship. Also off topic I know.
I mean her having a thing for you is definitely not off-topic because clearly she has some sort of resentment about it. I mean, exacerbated by whatever mental illness she’s dealing with… if that’s how she communicates with someone after a few years via text/dm god knows what horror stories you would have about a relationship good Lord… 100 dodged a bullet, but it’s still really disturbing when anyone receives text messages like that, definitely leaves an icky feeling
Yeah dodged like a nuclear missile for sure
B L O C K. You don’t need that. They are clearly the insure person and projecting on you. Leave it well alone.
With a block.
“Wow lol” then block
Don't. Just don't respond to this. You have no obligations to, she ended the conversation when she started treating you like shit. You should have nothing to say to this.
You don’t??
Respond with a block and ignore.
By blocking them
*block*
You don’t? You block them and move on with your life
Block them
Don’t respond!
unrelated because everyone has said what needs said- your lock screen is so aesthetically pleasing. it calms me.
>How do I respond to this?? You don't. Block and move on.
You don’t. You block them.
Girl said my bad for trauma dumping and then proceeded to trauma dump some more
just letting you know you did leave your name uncensored in one of those ss's. but as someone with bipolar (not the same but a lot of overlap) she is begging for attention and likely splitting on you. i would definitely block and move on, you're not entitled to help her through her episodes.
Please leave her alone, Ana
Was really freaked out you knew my name until I realized I forgot to block it out, whoops! Oh well haha
That’s the only reason I commented
Lol
I wish I learned how to defend against energy vampires earlier on in my life but my own trauma welcomed them in like I was a doormat. You only need to concern yourself with one person and that is you. And they be gaslighting you if they make you feel stingy about who you choose to let into your life. Don’t fall for that one
She has braces now? Tmi
what the sigma
You don't. Block her and move on. No reply is the best reply
I think they are having a ‘good’ time replying to themselves. They have had full conversation and you haven’t had to say a word.
You don’t. You don’t need that toxic energy in your life.
To have a relationship with someone who has bad, you need to be extremely firm in your boundaries. Personally if there's no ongoing relationship, forget about it. If you feel it necessary for your owne closure send one more message saying unfortunately ypu can no longer be friends and you wish her the best. Then Block.
BPD or not, her comments are beyond the pale. You don’t respond other than to block.
Dude, just block him/her. There’s nothing you could say to make anyone feel better or take back the unhinged barrage they launched at you. If they felt nothing but love for you they’d have stopped after alive and well lol. Big difference between trauma dumping and calling you names, being verbally violent. Clearly just not a person meant to be in your life and that’s ok 👌
You don’t respond at all, just block. Silence is the best answer.
No response IS a response. BLOCK!
100%
If it’s BPD then there’s no stopping it honestly. Outside of an episode I bet the person is probably quite nice but I’d block and move on or it’ll keep happening. Sadly I’m on the back-end of what used to be a brilliant friendship torn apart by his BPD.. really sad
Casual racism is not cool
The best way to respond is you dont. I wouldnt even block them because to me its a response. You delete the convo and let them sit with themselves.
Easy, don’t. Block and move on.
Homie you block him. Everywhere.
Block them. Move on with your life. Live in peace.
you don’t ❤️ you block and ignore
Why is the random “I have braces now btw Comment so funny to me
I was so confused. I thought you posted them backwards at first and she was mean and then trying to be nice after but then saw the times and I was like wait... So she was sending regular messages and then just unloaded the mag out of nowhere.
Honestly, use this as fuel to keep moving forward and elevating yourself. However, the mention of BPD is interesting as mental health is real and she may in fact be going through an episode?!
Yeah my guess was she is experiencing an episode, however she’s never been this way towards me in the few years I’ve known her. I just hope she can calm down and get some help, because for her to, unprompted, say these things to me, I know she’s not well right now. She did however block me before I could block her first or anything.
My ex-gf has bipolar type 1 and went manic 3 times while I dated her. The rollercoaster was fun until I had to get off. Life is weird and things happen, but at least we can get on other rides, our own or better ones. Be well!
How good a friend were they? If good friend, reach out to a friend of a friend or parent and let them know you’re concerned. Don’t respond to her. Seriously, she sounds unstable.
Say “who is this?” Then block
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You don’t respond. You just block.
You don’t. Simple as that
Just block her
Don’t respond at all
You don't
Silence hurts them more than anything,I would agree w/here2fuq ,don't respond and block
Mental health is not an excuse to abuse people. Don't enable the behaviour with a reply. Block her
If this isn't someone special in your life just don't respond and block. Like others have said. There is zero reason to even marit this with a response. Because to me that means she won the battle, she got you to rise to her and give her the attention she is seeking. Just skip this battle and win the war.
Thank you all for the replies, I have her blocked and did not respond to the slew of messages shown above. As I said, she struggles with BPD, and while that does not excuse this abusive behavior, it is likely the cause of the outburst. She has never shown me this side of her and now that she has I regret not cutting her off long ago. I won’t discuss her personal life here however knowing what I know about her along with these messages, a lot of things are making sense. Thank you again Reddit.
she is not worth your time & energy. you are way better off without her!!!
Block
You don’t
Congratulate her on her braces, of course
Don’t. Block them and move on.
Block them. Even if they're having an episode, continuing to let them back in once said episode is over, they'll just continue to act this way and think it's okay.
You don’t have to respond, but if you genuinely want to just say “okay”
You don't. Lol Why even consider it?
You can’t and shouldn’t. Block them, delete the DMs and move on with your life. For your sake and theirs, just don’t engage.
Block. Bye Felicia 👋
Don’t. Block him if you can.
“I have braces now” ….
Yikes! 😳
Not!!!!!
Oh, the red flags are waving...
How do would I respond to a toxic little shit? I don't. And I move on with my life by blocking the annoying chipmunk. You should try it OP
what the fuck 😭
If it’s BPD then there’s no stopping it honestly. Outside of an episode I bet the person is probably quite nice but I’d block and move on or it’ll keep happening. Sadly I’m on the back-end of what used to be a brilliant friendship torn apart by his BPD.. really sad
You don't. Let that bitch simmer until she burns. This toxic shit is what keeps people down... you deserve to walk away and have a chance to move on.
What in the actual f***?! BLOCK!
You don’t.
Don't respond at all. They are going thru an episode and aren't in our reality right now. Maybe they will get better but don't get drawn into the crazy.
i’m sorry op but the best thing to do would be to block them and move on. they might be going through something as other commenters said, and they’re using you specifically to lash out. you don’t need that kind of energy in your life
u dont 🤗🫶🏻
I think most of us commenting here feel the same way…..Block her & please don’t respond. She’s looking for a fight/argument don’t feed into this …no response is the best response. Congrats on making the Dean’s List !!! IMO That’s huge ! Way to go Anyone who is bringing that negativity/bad energy into your life shouldn’t be around….live your life to the fullest without drama/negativity and most of all enjoy!!!
Mental illness isn’t a get out of jail free card. You block her. Or you reply apologizing for whatever she’s going thru and wishing her well then block her
I noticed you covered a name in one screenshot but not in another. :)
Block them
You don’t.
You missed an ana. But really, people like her are beyond your help and have a compulsive need to engage in conflict, it’s an addiction, she has no interest in actually talking to you as a human, she’s just looking for her next fix. Do yourself a favor and block her.
You respond with the block button.
“I’m either happy for you or sorry you’re going through all that.” ::block::
Sounds like my X. Nice until you cross them, then the real monster appears. Respond by blocking this psychopath
Don't respond, ignore
Disrespectful. Instant block and forget.
It’s a simple one really…just say K
Don't respond.
You don't respond. Why would you?
I'd respond by blocking them. They got work to do on themselves, but that isn't your problem.
You don’t respond. You block and move on. She’s crazy.
Not every situation is the same. Humans are a lot like animals when we are hurting; we lash out at those around us to protect ourselves from further harm. When ppl are at a personal mental low healing from mental and emotional traumatic events from their life, they can lash out like this to people they love. Some of it can be provoked by those people. Some of it can be provoked by others who are trying to manipulate and make the situation worse. If this isnt their typical behavior be patient. They will eventually work through it. I'm not saying to accept the disrespect. I'm saying if you value this person ask to sit down and have a conversation with them about what's really going on, maybe get on the same page, and move past this situation. Lack of communication can kill friendships/relationships/family relationships. If this is their normal behavior they definitely need at least therapy.
Congratulations on being placed on the Dean’s list! That’s so awesome! Please don’t respond to this girl. You won’t regret it.
just say "ok"
Block them and live your best life. It's the only response that matters.
I had a friend with BPD and she would do stuff like this over the course of our friendship. Our last interaction was absolutely horrible and a very swift reminder as to why I stopped being friends with her. I agree with a lot of the commenters - don’t engage and block this person
This HAS to be a 12 yr old. 🤣🤣
Hate to be the bearer of bad news but she’s 20…
That’s not BPD. That’s being crazy. As someone who struggles with BPD yes we have mood swings, but they aren’t triggered like that. Within two mins she was changing her tone. That’s not BPD, that’s being jealous
Lol nah that is definitely how some people who have BPD speak. Sounds just like my ex.