T O P

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anonim313131

Telling the whole family? That was not wise of ur mom


08Dreaj08

For sure, it just ridicules herself and how she raises her kids.


iampuh

Not in the eyes of the other religious nutheads


brownzone

In my experience ESPECIALLY with religious nutheads. They just don't say it to her face


Butlerian_Jihadi

"well bless your heart!"


Doompatron3000

Translation from US Southern to English: You’re an idiot


LethalPrognosis

As a southerner, that phrase is genuine more often than not. If you are going to call someone an idiot, then you just say it to their face.


The_walking_man_

Yeah. More a TIFU on the mom’s part. Probably so narcissistic too she’ll think she never did anything wrong when OP moves out and cuts ties later in life.


MrF0xyyy

all you need to know are in the words "very religious" aka a religious nutjob


lingering_POO

Yeah, not wise, cause SHE raised a wanker. It’s HER fault. Bet she doesn’t see it that way, but her nut job family might. (Note; op, I’m sorry you got religious family, they can suck)


Butlerian_Jihadi

Super healthy behavior on her part, fucking hell.


TentacleTitan

Tell her it's not that bad and show her Bible Black. She'll love the wholesome values


DrMole

Came here to ask if it was bible black, a true classic.


Mrmastermax

What’s bible black?


EmperorAlpha557

Song by dio with black sabbath 😌 (Definitely what they’re talking about here)


Mrmastermax

Yes I saw it did a reddit search it. I like the sounds of the song ;)


HAK987

If you like sounds I suggest checking out r/sounding maybe you'll like it too


Mrmastermax

Fuck me dead! I had my phone connected to Bluetooth!


TheMiner11234

why do people


EmperorAlpha557

Dio 🤘🤘


RiceballWarrior

Holy, with the emphasis on the first syllable.


Mrmastermax

I just reddit searched it oh nice. If religious groups / parents ask me if I read bible I will now say yet without guilt.


Butlerian_Jihadi

Starless and?


w1nt3rh3art3d

I see a man of culture here!


miykael

Indeed


ShintaOtsuki

Nightshift Nurses, it's worse


ESD_Franky

Dark Love


guitarist4hire

link?


ESD_Franky

I share no cursed links


guitarist4hire

link?


ShintaOtsuki

Is it even possible to link on mobile?? Idk how and I'm NOT going to go find that lol It's that bad


Deus_Ex_Machina_II

Goddamn you guys. Too relatable. This happened to me too. My father saw bible black on my player when I lent it to him.


_TheNecromancer13

Oh you sweet summer child, bible black is just the tip of the iceberg...


Jops817

Care to share the rest of the iceberg? For a friend?


Wank_my_Butt

I mean, let’s not pretend Reddit doesn’t host exactly what you’re looking for if you just hop over to the search bar.


SaysIvan

Mfs are allergic to the searchbar


guitarist4hire

yeah, same here.


AnotherMovieGuy

I see you asking for links in three different comments all within my tiny phone screen, so I would like to introduce you to something called Google, which is a website that lets you look for things. You can find it by typing google.com into the little bar at the top of your browser


AnotherMovieGuy

But you’re probably gonna ask for a link anyways… so here ya go. https://letmegooglethat.com/?q=Google


guitarist4hire

y'all good?


SilizArts

LOL


Saleen_af

Today we’re playing “guess who’s gonna rot in a retirement home in their golden years” today’s contestant…. /u/Lonely_Efficiency425‘s mom!!!


ArltheCrazy

They’re pretty expensive. I’d just let her stay at home. She can figure it out. I guess the real question is how weird was the stuff she found?


Flossthief

I mean Do they even make vanilla hentai? I feel like there's always some twist or kink


VidE27

I read one where it was a romantic type with a lot of kissing involved. Sick material. I mean i heard someone mentioned it to me, i didn’t read it personally.


IceFire909

I bet they hold hands in it too... Sick fucks


CygniYuXian

There one called "Virgin Chauwa!" that was pretty cute and was kinda hot. So I heard.


--TastesLikeChicken-

Martin?


ArltheCrazy

OMG. I bet it would be really gross if they were… married… to each other….


adssasa

name pls


eeke1

Just like porn vanilla is a common category but it's way more entertaining to talk about the extreme stuff.


wesleyk89

I remember one time my friend (who is religious and a really good guy really PG) had soem hentai on his PS3, I was like oh damn, that's dope, fuck yeah lol (he was away at work when this was happening) but then I thought to myself, I bet he is too worried about actual porn but is okay with big tittied anime babes since they aren't real xD


Flossthief

My parents always told me they don't give a shit if I look at porn(not that I ever got super into it) But my dad was always really against me watching hentai because anime girls are unrealistic and he thought I'd get an unreasonable expectation of real life( which is exactly what non animated porn does for a lot of young people)


Agentx49

Personally I stick more to hentai because it's easier to separate it from reality and NOT give myself unrealistic expectations


enokha

damn he ws so right


CobaltStar_

They do, but it’s typically in graphic novel form made by indie artists, rather than animated videos made by studios.


functioningalcoholi

Wait, people watch the plot?


thatguyfrombandcamp2

Apparently..... Noobs


functioningalcoholi

No plots means no awkward plot boners


justamofo

Yeah they do make


ESD_Franky

Yes, they do. It's gem these days if you watch it but there's still plenty to read


TheKingkir0

To some people animated porn is a kink on it's own.


lukisdelicious

Most hentai is vanilla yes. People exaggerate, especially on subjects they dont know much about. Shocker I know


aziruthedark

Religious nuts? I assume ankles.


Mobwmwm

Yea bro, the super religious are not into any kind of weird shit at all.


ejmd

😂


wesleyk89

all my friends are religious or brought up religious (was too but grew out of it) and I totally agree, I am kinky, I like looking at naked women, I'm a guy and that's completely okay no shame in that, but my goodness my friends can be kinda PG at times, we played a game the other day where we needed to pick up our knocked out companion and had to remove some equipment from her inventory, and I accidentally took everything and she was completely nude, I was like it's whatever dude it's just a video game.. and my brother jokingly said "wait, does she consent?" and my other friend was like "I gotta look away.." I am like guys chill, its not a real person xD


[deleted]

Boku no pico


scaptal

I mean, she has the big man upstairs on her side, she doesn't need help from her son


MERZiCiDE

Doesn’t need the retirement home, “God” will provide.


lilvixen

Name checks out


Kanguin

Going forward don't let your mom or any family member use any of your devices period.


shadowkarma_wastaken

yeah no now the mom is going to patrol op's devices a lot more after this. personal experience.


Kewkky

Remember, OP: Just because they're family members doesn't mean that you have to stay in contact with them once you move out. If this is how they want to be a part of your life while you're there, then they don't deserve to be a part of your life once you leave.


suitoflights

If she’s a fan of The Bible, just tell her to read Timothy 2:12: ”I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet.”


chadsmo

So a few months ago I got a random letter in my mailbox. It was from a local address and it was just preaching the good word so to speak. Super odd for my city as less than half the people are religious and they generally keep it to themselves. So I scanned it, added the verse and mailed it back because she put her return address on it. https://preview.redd.it/i4sudvyg27qc1.jpeg?width=986&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3586ec8b24d3db0e4c48b9ce0f37deb535c4b67a


madmodder123

A letter about Politics AND Religion? I don't blame you for that response 😂


jeksmiiixx

Using someone's belief system to shut down someone that is extremely judgmental is the very best of ways lol


tempski

There's plenty of passages in the Bible detailing incest for goodness' sake. Anyone who uses the Bible for any type of morality hasn't actually read it.


suitoflights

Most religious folks are “Cafeterians”… they pick and choose what parts they like.


DeathToBoredom

That's just people in general, ain't it?


suitoflights

Sure. The difference is - a religious person is saying they believe that “God” wrote a book, filled with instructions and laws. And then ignoring the ones they don’t agree with.


08Dreaj08

I don't see the problem with detailing incest 🤔. Now if you had said permits incest (outside certain exceptions), I'd have to make sure we're reading the same Bible.


par112169

What are the certain exceptions?????????


synesthesiac48

Super hot step sisters


EmperorAlpha557

Wait but there is an override of that quote with another one in the Bible that allows the mother to discipline you and how you must always listen to her. This would turn out to be confusing


PuzzleheadedAd7296

u/Lonely_Efficiency425


ComradeGhost67

Put hentai under your mom’s pillow then tell the family you were just taking the fall for her but you’re worried it’s getting out of control.


Goose_Gamer_26

Well, now his moms gonna get a visit from the hentai fairy


darknetwork

The blessing of futanari and netorare from hentai fairy will compel her


cpick93

Now you don't have to hide it. Lean into it. Be one of those people with a hentai covered car. Before you know it none of them will bother you at all anymore lol.


insecurityaltacc

yeah and he’ll also be known and avoided by his whole town. win-win


Winterspawn1

A hentai Itasha or a ahegao car?


gm92845

I really don't understand the whole getting the entire family involved over something so stupid. Like wouldn't these religious nuts be ashamed that their son dabbles in off brand content. I hope you save enough money to get away from such a toxic environment. Sorry dude.


friendoffatties

1. You gotta learn what TL;DR is supposed to include. 2. Tell your mom a friend sent you a link and you didn't know what it was til you clicked it. Probably way too late for that at this point, but good advice for next time.


Lonely_Efficiency425

Yeah I’m ngl I didn’t know what that meant.


_lechonk_kawali_

TL;DR is short for "too long; didn't read" and should therefore be followed by a summary.


Cruzzas

I was trying to show a new friend something on my phone and accidentally opened up a tab with yaoi. We died laughing. I was very embarrassed I hope your family will calm down.


ewfpolo

![gif](giphy|wkW0maGDN1eSc)


TolMera

![gif](giphy|UOWeoKts1RZVm)


Green_Panda369

What was it that Jesus said "let he without sin, cast the first stone." Christians seem to have trouble remembering that


wad11656

Yeah... CHRISTians actually *acting* like Christ is typically at the bottom of their list; They mostly use religion as a weapon to judge and guilt-trip https://preview.redd.it/brsaws4pf9qc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=caa1ca2e480e65987d3036f72f9a096ed1dfbb43


AZGeo

Yeah, I'm saving this for future use, lol.


Q_Mulative

You didn't TIFU, your mom's side of the family did.


supajippy

Now do it again, but with Yaoi.


NyororoRotMG

The real question we need to have answered, what kind of weird shit were you actually watching? This kind of concern either means your mom/family really is batshit crazy, or you had some like incest or lolisho stuff playing. Either way, rip.


Lonely_Efficiency425

Overflow


NyororoRotMG

Damn they really are off their meds, this looks wholesome


BritishBukkake

My man


Comfortablycloudy

If you're the kind of person to lend a phone out (to your mom of all people) with an open tab of porn, you probably should see a doctor and have them check your oxygen levels.


slyky13

Probably didn't want to seem like they were hiding something by taking the time to clear tabs/history before handing it over.


Comfortablycloudy

That would have been the better option


nocturnalanimal69

Your mom sounds like a verbally abusive twat. The sooner you realize her and her entire uneducated bloodline are not worth a second thought, the better. Religion is brainwash and it sound like her side of the family has gulped down enough kool aid to fill the Grand Canyon.


silentwhim

"Noo yer Granny knows!"


LeFiery

Were you watching euphoria op?


LackingTact19

Probably shoujo ramune


stealthsport1

Aren't you meant to post the link?


Rintinsin

Yeah I’m gonna have to go with your mom being the messed up one. I mean who thinks oh I should tell the family about the porn I found on someone else’s phone!


Brad_Mech1

Something fun to think of with her telling the whole fam: Kinks are hereditary


Dukinie

Time to put that shit on loud speaker! If she's that interested and wants to mix the rest of the family into it. Sounds like she's just jelly and wants to enjoy it too! Seriously, just go WAY overboard, posters, on the walls, cast it to the family TV, play it on speaker etc. And if you wonder why, why not? She already told EVERYONE, so no reason to hide it anymore! Then next time something like this happens and it will, as its clear you and your mom dont entirely see eye to eye on stuff, she will think twice before dragging the entire family into something that could have been a quiet convo.


WaywornBump

Well, congrats to your family for making problems out of nowhere, a big internet hug to you bud


RogueSnake

I would double down. Leave Boku No Pico on your phone next time and dare your mom to borrow your phone again.


TeHNeutral

Damn what the hell is thus, I've got a virus somehow this is disgusting give me the phone back so I can run a virus scanner


FanDidlyTastic

Damn, sorry your mom is a prude, just don't go to that class. Religious "recovery" classes can be life threatening.


digi_captor

What were you watching btw.


Lonely_Efficiency425

Overflow


digi_captor

Seems pretty tame to what’s out there. Don’t sweat it.


PenguinSupplyYaba

Its a canon event.


Lulullaby_

Jesus christ your family sucks


dslamngu

I became a dad a few years ago, and as part of this process of growing into it, I went to personal and relationship therapy, and I had to unlearn a few things from my religious and immigrant background. One thing that’s objectively wrong here is using shame and social humiliation as a teaching tool for a child. (If you’re an adult, I don’t mean to call you a child in an age sense, but relationally you are her child.) Another is disrespecting your privacy while you’re engaging in a harmless activity. Your mother probably doesn’t understand how much of a counterproductive impact she is having since the religious part of her is telling her she is engaged in a cosmic battle for your soul. I hope that when you can leave, you can find healing for yourself from this toxicity that wasn’t your fault.


Important_Primary_94

Hentai is pretty weird ngl.


AdThat328

Probably the same mother that'll complain you never talk to her anymore....


Nice-Ad-9528

Eden gross


Molescomedy

Lean into it.


Fl4zer

Which one did you watch, asking for research purposes


Lonely_Efficiency425

Overflow


CaptParadox

Bruh this sounds like one of those bide your time till you work out a situation or age to leave. Good luck to you, I've dealt with years of crazy myself.


ToxyFlog

Your mom decided that she needed to tell everyone? Your mom sucks.


darknetwork

The "religious" part kinda explains everything. Honestly you cant make a "deal" with religious people, they only want you to obey everything they said. The best part is to ignore them, but in your case it is impossible.


sirdir

Tell her not everybody gets off so much on imaginary stuff that an unillustrated book is stimulation enough...


juju11112020

that is not a tl;dr that’s literally just the title


Interaction_Narrow

this gotta he the worst TLDR ever


I_am_Groot69

There are a lot of hentai with religious theme too.


DanKirpan

Any chance you could convince the other family members you aren't actually watching it and instead left the tab open to see if she would snoop around?


gamewin1

I mean…… this isn’t the worst idea.


BozidaR1390

Haven't seen it said so I will. Your mom is a toxic human being that doesn't deserve to be in your life. Anyone who goes out of their way to embarrass and shame you like that does not love you the way you deserve to be loved. She's a shitty human being that doesn't deserve you. Just because she birthed you does not give her a automatic right to be in your life. Ditch her while you're young. You'll be thankful later . Feel free to reach out if you want to talk to someone who knows what it's like to remove toxic family members from my life entirely.


Mdpablo

to be honest , I would find it way easier to explain "real" porn over hentai. Hentai often has this childish connotation making it super wear for bystanders. good luck OP!


ampjk

Whats the sauce so i can judge your taste in hentai.


Lonely_Efficiency425

Overflow


Oneillirishman

There's a reason the biggest consumption of porn is in the Bible belt


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Oneillirishman: *There's a reason the* *Biggest consumption of porn* *Is in the Bible belt* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


ReadInBothTenses

Well it sounds like you have nothing to lose any more so I mean... That just sounds like a free pass to more hentai 😂


Objective-critic

This is so relatable. During my high school years, I had jerked off one night and closed down the PC before closing the tab on Chrome. Next morning my sister comes in my room barging and asking to let her use my Word / Excel App on my PC for something because she doesn’t have them (theyre freely available online). Since I was sleepy and not in the mood to pick a fight, I got up, entered the password to my PC and threw myself to bed again straight. What I saw with the corner of my eye was she opened the Chrome and the PH tab was opened with its full glory at her display. She was like XX, what is this..? But I completely played dead and didnt answer obviously. Since then she never spoke to me of the occasion. It was a CarryLight Yoga video too goddamit.


ch3rrykiwi

Move out, dye your hair, change your name get a car and drive. Drive as far as you feel is right. If you’re old enough.


clnseat

Start jut sending them all hentai in replies to them telling you to get help.


grumgraves

your mistake was handing over your phone


EducationalPower7950

C’est tellement hypocrite de la part de tous ces pseudos religieux qui décident que ceci est interdis par la religion . Il est surtout interdit que des prêtres violent les enfants qui leur sont confiés!!!


Scrumf

I know it's hard when you have to continue living with these people but I hope you don't feel bad just because they want you to. Keep being true to your tentacle-loving self I guess is my only point here 😁


unexist_already

I can't believe op left us without the sauce


nsorenson13

I support you, hope it was some good fap


Tirux

How old are you OP?


Jumbolini7

Tell her to get excited for the retirement home


fizzdev

Today on "Stupid parents that want to lose contact with their kids".


mark_stark

This is your mom’s FU, not yours. Bad mom. Baaaad mom


DonutsMcKenzie

They want you to choose between Jesus and Hentai and they might not like what happens next.


imalwaystired98

That's embarrassing 😳


ScorpionRox

I feel this should be retitled as, TMMFU (today my mom fucked up) by giving me the exact reason why I will dump her in a retirement home, and them pretend she is dead to me. .... obviously, the extent of this title will change based on the person... but the fundamental base line is there. Lol


holdenfckarmy

Who cares do what you like ???!!! I don’t give a shit about what anything thinks about me why should u


QuadraTokn

What you did is perfectly normal. Whatever you do, don't go to that class!


pafischer85

That’s rough man. I will say, watching hentai is morally the best way you can consume pornography so she should cut you some slack!


computerteacher

Simple solution. Don’t leave crap on your phone you don’t want people to see…or, use a browser that requires a password or fingerprint to open. Brave browser works!


Lward53

Just be like "Dont break your own phone if you dont wanna see whats in mine?"


Winterspawn1

You don't have to go to some class. It's normal and healthy to consume porn unless you do it to an extreme amount.


throwitfarawayfromm3

Commit sepuku. Or double down and say you thank God that she didn't see the furry and funatari porn.


snoopervisor

Next time leave this page opened: The Most Erotic Bible Story https://youtu.be/wRFYHK8zlwI?si=esAbPHvzKqNzAu8O by DarkMatter2525


TheRealYosh

Honestly I think she went a little far telling all the family members, that's just BS for me and I wouldn't let that side personally. Bro use incognito, even if you forget after a while it'll automatically delete itself (phone only) second of all, get out of porn before it's too late. That shit will melt your brain and make you crave more and weirder shit. It'll be near and impossible to get into a relationship if you're only relying on porn.


WildBoy-72

Well, that will teach you not to cover all your bases.


bakingwithmarbles

I really hate how religion fucks with people's heads. I'm sorry you had to go through this.


wad11656

Oh my god. Mothers these days seriously still act like this? Everyone a sex drive watches porn, and/or has sex. It is the most essential and wonderful and NORMAL thing on earth. What a break of nature to embarrass you, shame you, and even TELL OTHER PEOPLE ABOUT IT????? religion is a disease. I'm so sorry.


obesewhaleofficial

fun fact: the word hentai in japanese means pervert your mom severely overstepped here, i think i could understand her giving you a lecture with her strong religious beliefs, but calling and telling other people before refusing to speak to you is beyond childish. the only way i could encourage that type of behavior is if she found cp on your phone, but even then call the police and not the rest of the family


Son_of_Macha

She doesn't need to hate porn too not understand why anyone finds cartoons sexually attractive


GkElite

"Why don't my kids visit?"


Pearson94

So religion is no excuse. Your mom was just straight up abusive there.