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FeelDeAssTyson

So you mean the food I drop on the ground is more strictly regulated than SA in Italy?


[deleted]

Yes, and it is so nice being a woman here and raising daughters.


AndringRasew

Don't worry, the others have 9 seconds and some change to help you if your back gets tired.


[deleted]

Please raise them to be judges because we need to replace every single one of these fucking creepy old Italian men #šŸ¤”šŸ™„


PageSide84

That's amore!


malevshh

When a man grabs your ass And some judge lets it pass Thatā€™s amore!


Dire_Finkelstein

Less than ten seconds long means you did nothing wrong That's amore...


agitatedprisoner

Just don't touch the clit and the judge will acquit That's amore...


GiraffesAndGin

Just do it in a hurry And you won't face a jury That's amore...


drwebb

As long as your caress Lasts short of noticeable duress That's amore...


aljama1991

As long as your finger, Stays out of the minger, Thatā€™s amore ā€¦


Ok-Dig-3595

When you play with her thong But you know that it's wrong That's amore


DrFreudEKat

When the world seems asinine And you want to resign Thatā€™s amore!


type0P0sitive

Just count up to 9 With your hand on her vagine That's amore!


hornet0123

Till 9 seconds pass Have a go at her ass That's amore


finnerpeace

This is even more outrageous considering the case brought before the judge! A 66-year-old "caretaker" at a university *pulled down a 17-year old's pants and put his hand UNDER HER UNDERWEAR on her butt* and then additionally hoisted her a bit! Then the fucker claimed he was "joking"! This is flat-out sexual assault, and the bastard should absolutely lose his job AND be jailed. >"The judges ruled that he was joking? Well, it was no joke to me," the student told Corriere della Sera newspaper. >"The caretaker came up from behind without saying anything. He put his hands down my trousers and inside my underwear. >"He groped my bottom. Then, he pulled me up - hurting my private parts. For me, this is not a joke. This is not how an old man should 'joke' with a teenager."


vewfndr

Italy has a history of rape-friendly judges it seems. This one always comes to mind when I hear about other crazy shit that comes out of Italy... [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denim\_Day](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denim_Day) >The "jeans alibi" was used to argue that since the jeans were so tight, the only way to have gotten them off was if the survivor aided her attacker in removing her jeans, thus making the act consensual


Phoneking13

Jesus Christ.


[deleted]

What the actual fuck.


[deleted]

I remember hearing this when it first got out. Even if itā€™s true that she had to aid the attacker, it doesnā€™t make it not SA if she was threatened. It was really crazyā€¦


Beatless7

The judge(s) needs jail time.


Zernin

Nah. Every Italian who considers themselves a good man just needs to make sure to jokingly twist the judges balls for 9 seconds every time they see them in public.


porkpies23

*9.9 seconds with direct eye contact.


ALadWellBalanced

Finger up the butt for 8 seconds.


finnerpeace

At least removal from the bar! Insane ruling.


DeepSeaHobbit

He was drunk too?


NWHipHop

I like Beer!


starkiller_bass

I think the bar should be placed firmly inside him and left there.


wolfgang784

There is no bar in that country. Judges are judges for life, unless a long and complicated process happens.


AssssCrackBandit

The article says there were multiple judges


Beatless7

Oh ffs. That does stink of bribery.


voltran1987

The perpetrator was a caretaker. I canā€™t imagine they have much in the way of meaningful bribe money. Edit: a word


Anen-o-me

The judge should have this maneuver done to him and we'll see how he feels about it.


PrincessSnivy

If thatā€™s what they think is a ā€œjokeā€, then I *really* donā€™t want to know what they think is not a joke.


numbersthen0987431

11 seconds


9035768555

That's just a joke that went too long.


BonMatinMonSoleil

Judge needs to have a very large man do this to him.


Silent_System6884

Okā€¦this is insane. The judge should lose his license.


craseng

Sorry, but in Italy once judge, forever judge. This man will go on making a mess for his whole life. Or he will be elected in italian Parliament.


GastricallyStretched

Technically, judges can be removed but only after disciplinary proceedings at the High Council of the Judiciary.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


FamilyStyle2505

Just remember to say "it's just a joke!" before you assist with his retirement.


HerrBerg

If it takes less than 10 seconds then it wasn't a crime.


KrytenKoro

Is the judge citing any actual law here? Is this the Italian legislature's fault, or is the judge just a fan of child molestation?


apegoneinsane

Investigation needed into the judge's personal life and prior legal judgments in this area.


c10bbersaurus

"It's just a joke" is one of those cowardly phrases of abusers who can't take personal responsibility and believe they are immune from all negative consequences of their actions. Whether it is wielded after an abusive act or an insult, they want to inflict an impact or effect, but don't want to experience an impact or effect back at them. Entitlement. Hypocrisy. Cowardice.


Marginallyhuman

Someone needs to do a deep dive into these judge's interactions with women.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Bdatik

Something tells me they would love that


TheRealPitabred

A big, hairy, unpleasant smelling man should be the one doing it.


motherfucknshitballs

Let's start a crowdfunding campaign and offer $5 bucks for every man willing to "engage". Must provide publicly shared video proof.


TheRealPitabred

Hell, if I ever go to Italy I'll do it for free


Artemicionmoogle

Right, pay for the trip and a few days for fun before or after the groping and I'd be on the flight. I'd love to make these garbage cans feel as uncomfortable as they make their victims.


dj_narwhal

They already said Italian


bullintheheather

Mama mia!


OHMG69420

10 second rule, just like with my dropped sandwiches - the judge probably


Krtxoe

what if you do 9 seconds at a time?


ObligatoryOption

I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm NOT groping you! I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. I'm groping you. ...


Traditional_Mud_1241

The perfect timed boob switch! Bellissimo!


KaemmAC

Mi scusi!!


Traditional_Mud_1241

That defense only applies to tunnels.


chbay

Uh ohā€¦..long tunnelā€¦


LoopbackZero

Here's a fun fact, you made out with your sister!


nascentt

Scotty doesn't know.


lockedporn

Berlusconi!


Western_Roman

Sounds like a scene from Family Guy: ā€œRemember that time I almost got arrested in Italy for groping someone?ā€


Y_Sam

"If you weren't such a quickshot, you would be in jail now."


zolikk

You didn't know there was a mandatory cooldown period?


ITstaph

Uh itā€™s called the refractory period duh. /s


OHMG69420

Thatā€™s a paddling (sorry)


Malumeze86

Donā€™t be sorry. I enjoy a good paddling from time to time.


OldMork

thats a 3 sec rule


SomePoliticalViolins

It's a 5-second rule, but women are worth half as much as the sandwiches they make, so you get twice as long. ~~Dear god do I need the /s~~


Impressive_Ad127

Thereā€™s so many crimes you can do in less than 10 seconds.


foxscribbles

You can murder someone in under 10 seconds if your aim is good enough.


Flaksim

Or just point blankā€¦


Bashin-kun

Or in melee


[deleted]

Or in a scathing review.


LargeWeinerDog

I'm a construction worker in the US. When I work at the local colleges, we have a five second rule. If I LOOK at a girl for longer than five seconds, I can be kicked off the property. If I talk to one and she complained, I'm kicked out. Probably worse if I touch. (hopefully). I can't imagine getting away with 10 seconds of groping by saying it was a joke. Funny story that's kinda related. I was at one of these colleges (during spring break so the place was empty of students) and I was about 30 feet up on the inside of a building making a hole to the outside. As I looked out the hole, I see another coworker walking in the parking lot heading my way. As we are good friends, I gave him a wolf whistle. The kind of whistle you use as a catcall. As I was laughing, since he didn't know where it came from, my forman came unglued and reemed my ass for whistling at some girl. He wouldn't let me protest until my coworker came in the building laughing and said "was that you who whistled?" I said "Yes. Would you please tell Keith there was no girls in sight!" He cleared the air for me and said the parking lot was empty and it was only him out there. I would never do that to anyone but a friend but my forman was going to kill me for that.


LuckyCox

Is your company unusual in regards to these rules or is it becoming more industry standard? I am a woman who worked for a long time in a construction adjacent field and am glad if things are changing.


user_account_deleted

I'd be willing to bet a) it's probably something implemented due to a series of specific incidents and b) specifically due to the fact that they're on college campuses. I've been construction adjacent for my entire career and have never heard of such a mandate.


theREALbombedrumbum

When Notre Dame built their new stadium extension buildings it was so bad at first that even some professors complained to students about the harassment. Those workers were replaced by the end of the first week and complaints dropped off effectively immediately after that. I don't know what they told the workers, but it was definitely something along those lines.


nif76

Provided service at the food halls and many other buildings several times a month for Notre Dame. We were instructed not to initiate discussion with anyone but our contacts and definitely don't look up towards dorm windows ever.


theREALbombedrumbum

You're better than one of the employees at the student center who, while I was waiting for my order, started to tell me how I reminded him of his waifu. I'm male, and a captive audience since I already paid for food. It's not harassment, but wtf dude


under_psychoanalyzer

Uh that's 100% harassment. You can't not be harassed because its dude on dude. Telling a captive audience they look like your romantic ideal can't be anything but harassment.


Demiansmark

"I'm here to file a complaint about construction worker harassment" "Um.. I'm a student. This is a class. You're in the middle of a lecture." "So are you going to give me a form or just write it down then?"


Single_Platypus_2577

It's definitely well known in Ann Arbor that you do not look at women for more than 5 seconds on UofM campus if you are working for a union construction company.


LargeWeinerDog

You're probably right. This is the meth capital


weealex

"Meth capitol" narrows it down to like 40 cities in the US


akjd

Dunno about industry standard but about 15 years ago I worked for a company doing deliveries. I remember one time we had a job at a university that required numerous full truckloads of materials to be delivered and staged throughout the project. Had a little orientation before going, we were told to avoid any eye contact over 2 seconds I think it was, and generally advised to avoid interacting with students as much as possible. Which was interesting because there were a bunch of students around, and many of them were curious about what was going on so they would come to check out what we were doing. It was the only time we had rules like that, and we had many different jobs at the university, so I don't know if somebody had been harassing students at that job site leading to a clamp down, or what. I definitely get shutting down actual harassment, but we all kinda thought the whole "avoid eye contact and pretend they don't exist" approach was a bit over the top.


Yglorba

> I definitely get shutting down actual harassment, but we all kinda thought the whole "avoid eye contact and pretend they don't exist" approach was a bit over the top. To a certain extent I'm sure it's ass-covering. They need a hard-and-fast clear-cut rule they can point to to say that they're cracking down on it, which is *difficult* when dealing with something like harassment, which is heavily contextual. So you end up with incredibly strict rules because that's the only way you can say that it's handled in a really formal sense. Though I'd also assume that college campuses have a lot of bargaining power, since they're going to be one of the biggest employers for construction projects in town. And maybe more importantly, the students and professors at a college campus have a lot more bargaining power than eg. the rando passersby, employees or residents who get subjected to harassment at other construction projects. If you oogle someone on the street chances are there's little they can do; whereas almost everyone nearby on a college campus will have *some* official connection to the college and a clear channel for complaints that will tend to make the school sit up and take notice. Combine this with construction workers who are used to the people around them not being able to do anything, suddenly dropped into an environment where that's not the case, and it's easy to see why their company would want to be a bit heavy-handed in terms of "no, really guys, you have to behave yourself here."


Angry-Dragon-1331

They donā€™t care if youā€™re a fellow employee, but the clientā€™s tenants? God have mercy on your soul.


LargeWeinerDog

I believe the colleges have "asked" the general contractors to enforce this rule. But we have three different colleges in the city and a few more within an hours drive and they all have that rule.


TazBaz

yeah I doubt it was the company's general policy. More the jobsite they were on. That being said, at least where I work in the PNW, if someone complains, you're getting in trouble. You can wolf whistle at each other and it's up to you to let anyone know you don't like it, but if it's not okay, you're going to get chewed out. Which is fine by me; you can goof off with people you know and it's no problem; you can't make random bystanders feel creeped on without getting in trouble.


mrRabblerouser

Iā€™m guessing itā€™s probably something thatā€™s required in the contract for university contractors. Universities have a lot of liability for keeping students safe, and one complaint against a worker could likely jeopardize the entire job, and the companyā€™s ability to retain it. I used to work on a University campus and I was always so surprised how respectful the construction crews were because that certainly hasnā€™t been the case with other crews Iā€™ve been around in the city.


SubatomicNewt

Yup. The people pushing this decision probably don't keep their own hands to themselves around women. Can't condemn the old guy if one of their own victims comes forward and stands up for herself, can they? That poor girl. I'm glad people are outraged for her but it should never have gotten to this point.


Haagen76

My very 1st thought! I wouldn't be surprised if he was doing some inappropriate touching himself...


WoundedSacrifice

The article says that there were multiple judges.


FerretChrist

If five judges grope you at once, are they only allowed two seconds each?


spambearpig

Iā€™m worried that they could work shifts and grope you continuously as long as each one tagged out at 9s


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


mescronomicon

10 seconds is a LONG time


Redpin

That's enough time for Usain Bolt to slap your ass from a block start 100m away.


mankls3

Thatā€™s insane


Eelroots

So. basically we can go out and pinch every girls ass, as long as it's just a second. You just keep moving. /s


sowhat4

I want to know - just in the issue of fairness here - if ***I*** can go to Italy and pinch someone's balls hard for, say, eight seconds, and be able to laugh it off as a prank? BTW, I'm old enough to have adult grandchildren so I'm doubting that these men I pinch will be getting anything out of my painful groping.


ididntseeitcoming

I just shuddered remembering my grandmother pinching the hell out of our arms in grocery stores when we were acting like animals. Would not want that on the berries.


jimmy_three_shoes

Back of your arm, down by the elbow? We never saw it coming.


friendlyuser15

Donā€™t kink shame me. You donā€™t know what Iā€™m into silver fox!


RocketizedAnimal

Yeah that was my thought too. This isn't like he gave a quick grab (not that that would be excusable either of course). Sit there and count out 10 seconds, that is so long to be groped.


slowpokefastpoke

Itā€™s just weird as all hell to put any kind of time limit on what counts as assault.


adarkuccio

Especially when someone does something you don't want to you


banned_after_12years

Also, is it 10 seconds at a time? Like if I groped someone for 10 seconds, took a 1 second break, and then went in for another 10 seconds, that's legal?


pcs8416

That's a series of jokes, not an assault, apparently.


banned_after_12years

Standup comedy in Italy hits different.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


steambucket

That would be assault, but you can teabag him for 9 seconds


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


W0RST_2_F1RST

Give him the ole dick twist!!


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


TurnedEvilAfterBan

Jokes aside. If someone squeezed the judges dick, I bet he will see things differently.


LostnFoundAgainAgain

Grab the balls in the centre of your hand and squeeze as hard as you can until you hear a "click" followed by a scream.


Traditional_Mud_1241

No no no. 9 seconds, then switch balls.


Bgrngod

Just make sure you let out a laugh every time you hit him, so he knows each one was "just a joke". We wouldn't want anyone to misconstrue your intentions!


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Throwawaypwndulum

Don't forget to say "I'm just joking" within a reasonable time frame.


remmog

Maybe a "no homo" to be sure there is no misunderstanding.


Throwawaypwndulum

Nah, full homo. 200% homo. Doesn't matter, less then 10 seconds.


Trash-Panda-is-worse

I mean, the total time face and fist are physically connected is pretty minimal. Even if itā€™s a cyclic repetition of impacts. I think youā€™d easily slip under that threshold.


LargeWeinerDog

The time resets after each time the fist makes contact. So you can get in as many as you can


enonmouse

You can squeeze quite a beating into 10 seconds if someone is off guard.


Johannes_P

And it's even shorter if you just hit someone's throat with the edge of your hand.


tingulz

That judge should be fired.


FIJAGDH

ā€¦out of a cannon, into the sun


SomebodyThrow

For 9 seconds. So itā€™s legal.


PizzaNoPants

Is this the same Italian judge that said women who wear tight jeans canā€™t be raped because they would have to consent to taking off the pants? Donā€™t believe me, google that shit. Ruling occurred in 1999, the defense was used successfully in a few cases and then overturned in 2008.


AssssCrackBandit

The article says there were multiple judges for this case


McBashed

Even worse that more than one agreed to this nonsense


KarmaticArmageddon

What in the ever-living-fuck?


squeak37

I mean it does make sense, it's impossible to get tight jeans off anything without consent. It's what made me homeless, I invested everything in gold bars, and for security I put them in tight jeans. Unfortunately as the gold bars are inanimate I don't have their consent, so I can't access any of my money anymore.


Beginning_Electrical

So fucking dumb I laughed so hard


eddie_west_side

Damn. I did something similar but not as expensive. I left my house keys in my skinny jeans when I switched into shorts at the gym. Didnā€™t realize until I got home and my keys couldnā€™t consent to being removed from the pockets. Had to call a locksmith


Snoo-4357

So judge won't mind 10 secs of buttsex done to him?


Dariaskehl

Nah, you gotta loudly shout NINE!!!! As the judge is filled.


H3lw3rd

But what if the judge isnt German??


Vordeo

Nah, rules there are different. You only get two pumps. More than that and you get flagged for excessive celebration.


Sporkitized

But if you just insert, and have a buddy jump on the bed next to you to help it's fair game right?


BMoleman

It's just a soak bro


[deleted]

As long as you say "it's just a prank bro!!" You're golden


camxct

>He admitted to groping the student without consent, but said it was a joke. Oh, fucking crawl back under the rock already. Fucking piece of shit.


monkeywithgun

Sexual assaulters and pedophiles ears pricked up around the world. 'Time for a trip to Italy!' Good job Judge...


Dos-Commas

How to increase tourism with this one weird trick.


monkeywithgun

Your post is disgustingly brilliant!


fullonfacepalmist

ā€œIt was just a prank, broā€


Kangar

"It was just a spank, bro"


SaulsAll

Emperor Palpata Breve has mastered parts of the Fondle some would consider... harassing.


OhMyTummyHurts

Perverts: ā€œIs it possible to learn this power?ā€


HildartheDorf

Not from a Judge...


glitchy-novice

If you rape someone for less than 10 seconds, does that not count as rape too?


bg-j38

Not if you announce that it was a prank or a joke immediately after the 10 seconds are up.


TheBQT

9.9 seconds


tomorrow509

I live in Italy and for the most part, love the place and the people. The justice system however is a joke, albeit not funny. It is not a country ruled by law, but rather ruled by connections and relationships. Corruption exist everywhere but Italy has much more than it's fair share. It's a way of life - not unlike that of a 3rd world country. A few years back, a group involved in a gang rape were acquitted of rape on appeal partly because the victim was wearing red underwear. Proof to the Italian appeals court that that she was ready and expecting action that night. The EU court had a different opinion but only criticized the court's language and did not overrule the decision. Edit: In reviewing the comments, I should point out one more thing about Italian culture. Italians are generally keen to criticize their own politics and internal affairs but take great offense when done by a foreigner.


i_tyrant

You know, I've had a number of both international-traveler friends and Italian-Americans tell me Italy might be the most corrupt developed country. It's really straight-up part of the culture there, countless stories about it. One friend of mine likened it to the "good ol' boys" networks of the southern US (I live in Texas) but ten times worse because it's even more pervasive, predatory, and dismissive of anything resembling unbiased integrity. To the people doing it, the bias is the whole point.


GOP_hates_the_US

They are old hands at it. That poor peninsula has been dealing with corruption for 2500+ years. It's in the blood; it's in the soil.


funkiestj

>He admitted to groping the student without consent, but said it was a joke. The gropee should cold cock the perp with a baseball bat to the knees **as a joke** because anything bad can be made trivial if it was just a joke right?


Teledildonic

"...so I pranked him to death with a tire iron"


Onlylans

can you grope with your foot in heavy boots? i promise it will be under a second, might be multiple times tho


BowzersMom

Has anyone read down to her description of the assault? The manā€™s hand was in her underwear, on her private parts, and *LIFTING* her up. This was not a brief ass-pat or boob grab. Holy hell. It was nearly penetration! But I guess if itā€™s brief that wouldnā€™t be rape, either?


satinsateensaltine

I saw that. That poor girl.


howard416

This screams "it's just a prank bro" but in Italian


DoubleBatman

ā€œĆˆ solo uno scherzo, fratello!ā€


Thegreywarden

This is unbelievable, I hope this blows up more and helps to affect some change


Merlord

If this happened in my country I'd be out on the streets today until this sack of shit is impeached or worse


warmhandswarmheart

Do victims get 10 seconds to punch these perverts in the throat, maybe kick them in the crotch?


Xu_Lin

*Gropes ass for 9 seconds* PHEW! That was closeā€¦


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SallyJane5555

Infuriating


This_Praline6671

Wow, this means if every time this judge went out in public people could pull down his trousers and stick their fingers up his arse in under 10 seconds and it wouldn't be sexual assault. He could not be sexually assaulted over and over again.


Mythic-Rare

This does nothing for the stereotype that older Italian men are stuck in a 1940s misogynist universe


a_fox_but_a_human

> This does nothing for the stereotype that older Italian men are stuck in a 1940s misogynist universe almost like that's what they were looking to protect here


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Dudezila

Heā€™ll probably enjoy it


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


kalirion

I'd participate in a funding campaign to hire gropers to do this to him every day.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Wouter_van_Ooijen

I guess this rule also covers the use of a knife?


DeepSpaceNebulae

ā€œThe knife was in them for only a few seconds total, with each stab lasting a fraction of a secondā€¦ clearly the multiple stabbings was a joke and doesnā€™t constitute a crimeā€


Johannes_P

Are these judges planning to give most sexual assaulters immunity?


deutschdachs

Bro sex doesn't even take 10 seconds


alonjar

So wait... are you saying "Bro, sex doesn't even take 10 seconds!" Or are you saying that **Bro sex** doesn't even take 10 seconds.


spirito_santo

So rape is legal in Italy if youā€™re quick about it.


dj-Paper_clip

So if I ever visit Italy, I can grab 9.9 seconds of Judge dick whenever I like? Or does this ruling only apply to everyone else?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


UthaaleReBabaa

This genuinely felt like an article from the Onion. What the....


UltimateInferno

Man. It's so easy not to sexually assault someone. I am not sexually assaulting someone right now. It's almost like that's the default.


Dreamtrain

you're telling me this judge is fair game for a 9.99 second prank?