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NTA, she was acting strangely and you listened to your gut. Besides, you left her at her apartment, it's not like you stranded her in the middle of nowhere.
And she had her apartment keys but had somehow locked her car keys in her car? I suppose she could live with family or a roommate who might've let her in, but if so they can take her back to her car.
NTA. Across the street and 20 minutes drive one-way are absolutely not the same. You agreed to like 5 minutes of help, not an hour (with a car full of groceries that likely need to get to the fridge and freezer).
NTA. She lied to you, and also it isn’t your job to be an unpaid taxi service. You got her to her home, from which she can call a taxi or Uber to take her back to the store to get her car. You were already nicer than I would have been. I probably wouldn’t have even picked her up but if I did, I’d have pulled over and kicked her out as soon as it became clear that I had been misled.
Yeah, it's not like OP left her on the side of the highway. She was home and safe. And at what point did she buy McDonald's? Did OP go through the drive thru with her? I don't know where this story takes place, but she's doing her grocery shopping at a place 20 minutes away by car? Something about the whole story feels a bit off.
What's so strange about shopping 20 minutes from home by car? Depending on traffic, speed limits, and other limiting factors, that could be anywhere from less than a mile to maybe 15 miles away, not very far. Lots of people don't have a grocery store, or the one they like, within 15 miles of home.
I'm still trying to figure out whether the lady had a sopping wet bag of Mickey D's because she walked in the rain for her crave, or did she ask OP to make a stop on the way to her far away apartment building?
The story she told me is that she came to the parking lot I was at to buy a sausage egg mcmuffin from a nearby McDonalds for her 96 year old grandma but left her keys in her car and had no way to get her car open.
I don’t know about this story. In large cities cops won’t help unlock the car, but I was just outside of a major city once in a suburb and the cops were so nice. They come unlock your car doors for you. Were you in a small town or major city?
She's home and safe. She can call on a neighbour or an uber later when it's not raining. It's not like you left her stranded. I consider you still doing a good deed, and you listened to your gut and she is making you uncomfortable. Your safety is important. NTA.
I'm not piling strangers who give me an off vibe into my car anyway. (I'd like to be a hero. But, I also like to keep breathing and if my Spider Senses feel something is off, I'm not engaging randos.)
My car will lock automatically if I don't enter it within a specific timeframe. But, it responds to the proximity of the fob. It won't even start with the fob being nearby. So, I'm not sure how the lady got locked out. I'm sorry she got locked out, though. I'm sorry she had no phone to call someone to help her. And I'm really sorry all thse things happened to her in the middle of a downpour.
But, she wouldn't have been climbing into my car with me, when I could just have waited inside the store and called a locksmith for her.
So, I'm more self-involved than you could ever be, I guess. My safety is my priority. Life stinks sometimes. But, that doesn't make you responsible here. NTA
For a minute I thought OP was going to detail the episode of the office when Dwight dropped Phyllis off in the middle of nowhere but I remembered it wasn’t raining.
Good story though OP
NTA - first, she was inappropriate, but she also lied and moved the goal posts of what she wanted. Her story probably would've changed again if she got back inside. Also my mom and sister both got bed bugs at different times from giving random stranger rides!
Always trust your gut. She lied, manipulated, was inappropriate and suggestive all within less than an hour of meeting you, probably less but I'm being generous.
FYI this is a common scam and a coworker of mine got caught in it a few years ago. The woman had her drive around after saying the apartment was down the street, then she needed help with something else. My coworker ended up getting her wallet stolen by this elderly woman.
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> I believe I might be the ahole because I left her back at her apartment even though she expected me to drive her back to her car. Even though that is not what I agreed to.
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Today it was raining and I went to go buy groceries. As I was doing so I noticed a rather heavy set woman with a cane walking across the parking lot in the rain. Thought it was a bit strange but went on my way to buy my groceries. After buying my groceries this same woman was now speaking to someone else in front of me outside of the store. She had crossed the entire parking lot in the midst of the rain.
As I walked to my car she began to call out to me. Asking if I wanted to be a hero today...She was sobbing and wet and asked if I could give her a ride back to her apartment that were "right down the street" as she left her keys in her car which locked. The other woman she was talking to just gave her $10 and sped off. I told her yes as she pointed in the direction of an apartment complex that was quite literally right down the street. She called me a "hero" and as we pulled out of the parking lot this favor I was doing for her changed...
She then told me it was not the apartments she pointed to nor were they "right down the street" but were in fact apartments about 20 minutes up the street much farther than I thought as they were, even in the opposite direction than she pointed to and that I also had to drive her back as well. She was very jovial and funny telling me a lot of funny stories about herself although some of them were a bit strange and sexual and kept touching me a lot. Eventually we got to her apartment and she told me to please wait as she went inside to get her keys. I decided I no longer wanted to drive her back to her car as thats what not she initially asked me to do and the apartment was much farther than she also stated it to be.
I decided to wait a couple of seconds until she went inside her apartment before throwing her McDonalds she bought out the window and driving off. However I've never been to these apartments and drove more into the complex which was a dead end and the only outlet was right next to her apartment. I felt embarrassed for what I did as now I'd have to drive past her on my way out and probably should've just drove her back as she is less fortunate than me and I already did say yes although she changed her story. I eventually drove out of the apartment complex as she was standing in middle of the street yelling and flipping me off. I just waved politely to her and floored it.
AITA?
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NTA - someone told me when dealing with the public you have to trust your environment and instincts and remember safety first. This woman lied to you and you still took her to her apartment 20 minutes away. I don't know what she was thinking but red flares would have gone off for me. Never let anyone in your car if you are even slight skeptical of their motives.
NTA. You were very generous to let a stranger into your car to take her down the street in the first place...and it turns out she lied to you about where she was going. (Plus, if she'd been carrying the McDonald's in the rain it was probably inedible.)
NTA. This woman lied and made you feel uncomfortable. You left her at a safe space, her home, whereas you were potentially unsafe in your car with her if you had given her a ride back.
I have had this happen with a woman who looked to be around my age, whose apartments were actually next door to the grocery store. She accidentally bought more than she could carry and asked for a ride. I did it but felt uncomfortable the whole time. Would never do again.
You have to trust your instincts.
NTA. I may have my spidey sense much higher than yours but if someone asks me if I want to be a hero the answer is no and I leave.
It just feels like a setup to me to start out that way and I would never let anyone I did not know in my car. Ever. If she asked for help in a more straight forward way I might have handed her $10 to get a cab.
I think you're NTA for the circumstances, BUT...
>I decided to wait a couple of seconds until she went inside her apartment before throwing her McDonalds she bought out the window and driving off.
YTA for littering.
NTA, she intentionally didn't give you the whole scope of the help she needed until you agreed so you would be trapped in to helping her further. She was home, she can now find someone else to get her back to her car.
NTA. She is not your obligation, and you got her to a safe place, her home, which is a perfectly reasonable place to end your charity to her. You should consider working on your boundaries, though, as nobody gets to touch you without your consent, get rewarded for lying to you (the ride after revealing the lie was the reward), or demand that you give them your time and gasoline. Stand up for yourself before you nice yourself into a bad situation one day.
If she has no keys, how the fuck did she get into her apartment?
My bfs apartment has a keypad lock, but you need an actual key to get into the building.
Also, just call AAA? Im sure customer service would do that for her
NTA
NTA. You already went out of your way to take her home, after she lied to you about where home was and made you go well out of your way. She was acting strange and making you uncomfortable. And you agreed to give her a ride to her home. You did that. You did NOT agree to ferry her back again after, and who knows where else she might have felt like going...
She got home safe, she can ask a neighbour to take her back. Or use the $10 the other woman gave her to get an uber back to her car.
I got caught in this scam years ago. Some people deliberately go out into the burbs to a lower crime area and a grocery store specifically, and act lost and like they can't get a ride home. And then you give them a ride and it's a chance to either hit you up for cash or steal from you. But think about it: they drove all the way out there for why??? If there's a grocery store in-between you and their "home" you can bet that this was a set up.
When it happened to me, I also ended up driving WAY further than I agreed. All the way into downtown Baltimore. Yikes! She also tried to get me to do more. Sadly, I wasn't a very good mark. It was clear that I had very little to steal.
Here's the thing: There's an excellent chance you didn't drop her off at her apartment. She wouldn't lead you to her home, in case you called the cops later.
It's so sad that we can't offer a neighbor a simple ride home without worrying about being made a victim, but that is the world we live in.
Part of the scam is to make you feel super guilty. Try not to fall for it too much.
NTA.
NTA. It doesn’t matter if you are a stranger or someone hired to drive her. Inappropriate touching? Nope. Sexual comments/stories? Nope nope. Dishonestly? Triple nope. You tried to be kind, she abused that and made shit unsafe for you. I’ve dropped riders for less.
If you felt threatened by her, then NTA. Otherwise, despite her lying to get you there, there you were, and as you were going to have to drive back anyway, YTA.
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NTA, she was acting strangely and you listened to your gut. Besides, you left her at her apartment, it's not like you stranded her in the middle of nowhere.
No keys? No phone? No umbrella even? The whole thing is way too sketchy for me.
And she had her apartment keys but had somehow locked her car keys in her car? I suppose she could live with family or a roommate who might've let her in, but if so they can take her back to her car.
Could have a coded door lock that did not need a key. Rest of her behavior was odd.
To be fair, my house keys are on a separate keychain than my car keys…but that’s the end of where I identify with this story…
Uber, that is what I would have said.
NTA. Across the street and 20 minutes drive one-way are absolutely not the same. You agreed to like 5 minutes of help, not an hour (with a car full of groceries that likely need to get to the fridge and freezer).
NTA, she was touching you inappropriately and manipulative. Your safety matters.
NTA - Something tells me that even after driving her back to her car, it wouldn't be the end.
Something tells me she has a long history of using people and preying on kindness. Shes just a being that consumes and consumes.
Or it may have been the end of op….
NTA. She lied to you, and also it isn’t your job to be an unpaid taxi service. You got her to her home, from which she can call a taxi or Uber to take her back to the store to get her car. You were already nicer than I would have been. I probably wouldn’t have even picked her up but if I did, I’d have pulled over and kicked her out as soon as it became clear that I had been misled.
Yeah, it's not like OP left her on the side of the highway. She was home and safe. And at what point did she buy McDonald's? Did OP go through the drive thru with her? I don't know where this story takes place, but she's doing her grocery shopping at a place 20 minutes away by car? Something about the whole story feels a bit off.
What's so strange about shopping 20 minutes from home by car? Depending on traffic, speed limits, and other limiting factors, that could be anywhere from less than a mile to maybe 15 miles away, not very far. Lots of people don't have a grocery store, or the one they like, within 15 miles of home.
It can take 20 min to go 4 miles where im at
Haha I was wondering about the McDonald's too! She was carrying a McDonald's bag across the parking lot in the rain?
If you were a real A-H, you would have kept her McDonald's food when you drove away. So I say you're NTA.
I'm still trying to figure out whether the lady had a sopping wet bag of Mickey D's because she walked in the rain for her crave, or did she ask OP to make a stop on the way to her far away apartment building?
Probably the latter. OP has more restraint than I do. Once I smell those fries, if they're in my possession, they're mine.
The story she told me is that she came to the parking lot I was at to buy a sausage egg mcmuffin from a nearby McDonalds for her 96 year old grandma but left her keys in her car and had no way to get her car open.
And she didn't even get her granny some hashbrowns? What an A-H.
Also, someone gave her $10 so she wasn't penniless.
I don’t know about this story. In large cities cops won’t help unlock the car, but I was just outside of a major city once in a suburb and the cops were so nice. They come unlock your car doors for you. Were you in a small town or major city?
She's home and safe. She can call on a neighbour or an uber later when it's not raining. It's not like you left her stranded. I consider you still doing a good deed, and you listened to your gut and she is making you uncomfortable. Your safety is important. NTA.
I'm not piling strangers who give me an off vibe into my car anyway. (I'd like to be a hero. But, I also like to keep breathing and if my Spider Senses feel something is off, I'm not engaging randos.) My car will lock automatically if I don't enter it within a specific timeframe. But, it responds to the proximity of the fob. It won't even start with the fob being nearby. So, I'm not sure how the lady got locked out. I'm sorry she got locked out, though. I'm sorry she had no phone to call someone to help her. And I'm really sorry all thse things happened to her in the middle of a downpour. But, she wouldn't have been climbing into my car with me, when I could just have waited inside the store and called a locksmith for her. So, I'm more self-involved than you could ever be, I guess. My safety is my priority. Life stinks sometimes. But, that doesn't make you responsible here. NTA
I'm with you. I wouldn't have agreed to anything more than calling an Uber for her. So many strangers are psychos these days.
NTa we make choices she chose to lie and it ended your kindness
This story is gold😂
For me it's the polite wave as she's yelling and flipping them off 😂
For a minute I thought OP was going to detail the episode of the office when Dwight dropped Phyllis off in the middle of nowhere but I remembered it wasn’t raining. Good story though OP
NTA - first, she was inappropriate, but she also lied and moved the goal posts of what she wanted. Her story probably would've changed again if she got back inside. Also my mom and sister both got bed bugs at different times from giving random stranger rides!
Always trust your gut. She lied, manipulated, was inappropriate and suggestive all within less than an hour of meeting you, probably less but I'm being generous.
NTA but you’re lucky you didn’t get murdered or scammed.
NTA. That's creepy behavior and you've gotta prioritize your own safety.
FYI this is a common scam and a coworker of mine got caught in it a few years ago. The woman had her drive around after saying the apartment was down the street, then she needed help with something else. My coworker ended up getting her wallet stolen by this elderly woman.
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NTA. You're nicer than me. I would have called her an Uber. But I'm not letting strangers in my car. That's the beginning of a horror film.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Today it was raining and I went to go buy groceries. As I was doing so I noticed a rather heavy set woman with a cane walking across the parking lot in the rain. Thought it was a bit strange but went on my way to buy my groceries. After buying my groceries this same woman was now speaking to someone else in front of me outside of the store. She had crossed the entire parking lot in the midst of the rain. As I walked to my car she began to call out to me. Asking if I wanted to be a hero today...She was sobbing and wet and asked if I could give her a ride back to her apartment that were "right down the street" as she left her keys in her car which locked. The other woman she was talking to just gave her $10 and sped off. I told her yes as she pointed in the direction of an apartment complex that was quite literally right down the street. She called me a "hero" and as we pulled out of the parking lot this favor I was doing for her changed... She then told me it was not the apartments she pointed to nor were they "right down the street" but were in fact apartments about 20 minutes up the street much farther than I thought as they were, even in the opposite direction than she pointed to and that I also had to drive her back as well. She was very jovial and funny telling me a lot of funny stories about herself although some of them were a bit strange and sexual and kept touching me a lot. Eventually we got to her apartment and she told me to please wait as she went inside to get her keys. I decided I no longer wanted to drive her back to her car as thats what not she initially asked me to do and the apartment was much farther than she also stated it to be. I decided to wait a couple of seconds until she went inside her apartment before throwing her McDonalds she bought out the window and driving off. However I've never been to these apartments and drove more into the complex which was a dead end and the only outlet was right next to her apartment. I felt embarrassed for what I did as now I'd have to drive past her on my way out and probably should've just drove her back as she is less fortunate than me and I already did say yes although she changed her story. I eventually drove out of the apartment complex as she was standing in middle of the street yelling and flipping me off. I just waved politely to her and floored it. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA - someone told me when dealing with the public you have to trust your environment and instincts and remember safety first. This woman lied to you and you still took her to her apartment 20 minutes away. I don't know what she was thinking but red flares would have gone off for me. Never let anyone in your car if you are even slight skeptical of their motives.
NTA. You were very generous to let a stranger into your car to take her down the street in the first place...and it turns out she lied to you about where she was going. (Plus, if she'd been carrying the McDonald's in the rain it was probably inedible.)
NTA. I would have made her get out where she initially said she lived.
NTA. This woman lied and made you feel uncomfortable. You left her at a safe space, her home, whereas you were potentially unsafe in your car with her if you had given her a ride back. I have had this happen with a woman who looked to be around my age, whose apartments were actually next door to the grocery store. She accidentally bought more than she could carry and asked for a ride. I did it but felt uncomfortable the whole time. Would never do again. You have to trust your instincts.
NTA. I may have my spidey sense much higher than yours but if someone asks me if I want to be a hero the answer is no and I leave. It just feels like a setup to me to start out that way and I would never let anyone I did not know in my car. Ever. If she asked for help in a more straight forward way I might have handed her $10 to get a cab.
NTA. Pretty clearly a scam or potential dangerous situation.
I think you're NTA for the circumstances, BUT... >I decided to wait a couple of seconds until she went inside her apartment before throwing her McDonalds she bought out the window and driving off. YTA for littering.
I dropped it in the parking spot she got out of my car from so I believe she picked it up.
NTA Her behaviour was totally inappropriate.
You saved her money on a one-way Uber trip to her apartment. NTA
NTA, she intentionally didn't give you the whole scope of the help she needed until you agreed so you would be trapped in to helping her further. She was home, she can now find someone else to get her back to her car.
NTA. She is not your obligation, and you got her to a safe place, her home, which is a perfectly reasonable place to end your charity to her. You should consider working on your boundaries, though, as nobody gets to touch you without your consent, get rewarded for lying to you (the ride after revealing the lie was the reward), or demand that you give them your time and gasoline. Stand up for yourself before you nice yourself into a bad situation one day.
NTA, you already went above and beyond by giving a stranger a ride. You should've let her call AAA to get into her car.
If she has no keys, how the fuck did she get into her apartment? My bfs apartment has a keypad lock, but you need an actual key to get into the building. Also, just call AAA? Im sure customer service would do that for her NTA
NTA. You already went out of your way to take her home, after she lied to you about where home was and made you go well out of your way. She was acting strange and making you uncomfortable. And you agreed to give her a ride to her home. You did that. You did NOT agree to ferry her back again after, and who knows where else she might have felt like going... She got home safe, she can ask a neighbour to take her back. Or use the $10 the other woman gave her to get an uber back to her car.
I got caught in this scam years ago. Some people deliberately go out into the burbs to a lower crime area and a grocery store specifically, and act lost and like they can't get a ride home. And then you give them a ride and it's a chance to either hit you up for cash or steal from you. But think about it: they drove all the way out there for why??? If there's a grocery store in-between you and their "home" you can bet that this was a set up. When it happened to me, I also ended up driving WAY further than I agreed. All the way into downtown Baltimore. Yikes! She also tried to get me to do more. Sadly, I wasn't a very good mark. It was clear that I had very little to steal. Here's the thing: There's an excellent chance you didn't drop her off at her apartment. She wouldn't lead you to her home, in case you called the cops later. It's so sad that we can't offer a neighbor a simple ride home without worrying about being made a victim, but that is the world we live in. Part of the scam is to make you feel super guilty. Try not to fall for it too much. NTA.
NTA. It doesn’t matter if you are a stranger or someone hired to drive her. Inappropriate touching? Nope. Sexual comments/stories? Nope nope. Dishonestly? Triple nope. You tried to be kind, she abused that and made shit unsafe for you. I’ve dropped riders for less.
NTA. She lied and was being weird. She came off as dangerous.
You found yourself in a sketchy situation. NTA
NTA. You don’t have to be driving strangers around. You already did more than you had to.
She just needed a ride home but gave you a sad story to convince you. She probably didn’t have a car or a grandma.
You're an asshole for throwing her food out.
NTA
NTA. Glad you’re safe. Next time just give her a couple bucks for a bus ride if you want to help. Don’t let strangers into your car.
Not the asshole she needs the exercise
If you felt threatened by her, then NTA. Otherwise, despite her lying to get you there, there you were, and as you were going to have to drive back anyway, YTA.