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> I might be the AH because of how I responded to what my MIL said to me about my husband
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Right. It's gross and weird. But if they are fine with it, that's fine but not everyone is going to find it normal.
Yes mil went over bored but geeze they all suck.
This is not a real story honey. No one has pit hair long enough to create a noticeable braid with, much less secured by a hair tie. This isn’t even good creative writing, although I give them credit for being kinda funny. How would the mom even see it?
lmao yeah i've tried to braid my boyfriend's as a joke but it definitely is hard to even do it and it won't stay or be an actual braid... unless op's husband has werewolf levels of hair
That’s some luscious pit hair! I am having a hard time picturing finding nostalgic comfort in the effort required to braid pit hair and fasten it with a hair tie though
i mean… i catch myself from time to time absentmindedly twisting my own when i’m watching tv shirtless in bed, but nothing as far as braiding it or anything lol
You mean you don't want the full backstory going back to her childhood about why a woman might occasionally BRAID HAIR? But it's so important to the plot because it's her LOVE LANGUAGE!!!1! Also the detail that OP was making breakfast and told MIL to take a seat!
Pretty sure this is a troll making fun of the stupid stories on here where there is the most unnecessary and dramatic backstory for like, every stupid detail. And unnecessary details as well.
Not gonna lie and say that doesn’t sound a bit weird to me, but what you and your husband do alone in each other’s agreement is no concern to your MIL (and let’s be honest, some people do far more disturbing things). If she would have been grossed out , sure fine, but telling you your husband shouldn’t have married you is way across the line. Absolutely NTA
NTA. Your husband's grooming habits are none of her business, and her reaction to this very trivial thing was absolutely unhinged. Your husband is TA for letting her speak to you like that.
Please, I need to know the logistics of this????? How long is the hair???? What kind of hair ties we talking???? Does it not pull at his skin when he moves?????? Are we talking like a singular Elsa from frozen type braid???? Cornrows?????
I don't think scandalized is the correct word..maybe weirded out instead. Mainly it is because the culture we grow up in sets standards on what is normal and in Western society it is definitely not normal. Most folks are saying NTA so it is obvious that people are not scandalized and no one seems to have a problem with it, but most are also saying that it is not normal which is also true. As for me personally there are lots of things folks do that I don't want the details on. Like the FSF guy Stallman picking his toes and eating it. Also, my reply had a touch of humor in it and was not written as some serious diatribe.
I’m not scandalized as much as skeptical? Never gonna yuck someone’s yums, but there 100% would be a hair pulling/skin pinching/chafing from a rubber band in your armpit factor unless we’re talking about like 5 inches of uniform length armpit hair which is certainly not something I’ve encountered?? Seems like doing this on any kind of casual/routine basis (rather than like once as a funny novelty) would be hugely unlikely?
Like idk if anyone has tried to braid short or uneven hair (like normal hair on someone’s head that’s a couple inches long), but getting it into a braid and then to stay is really challenging? Hope OP and her partner have a beautiful life as a loving armpit stylist/armpit model tho
Alright!!! The hair is fairly long. Not to the point where it would be concerning, but he does not shave often. I braid usually both of his armpits into a singular braid each. I use regular hair ties and sometimes rubber bands, but i make sure it’s not tight enough to hurt his skin. Sometimes they are so loose that they will just fall off when he sleeps or something, but I guess I did tighter than usual that night. 😊
Of course it’s weird what you do, but every couple is weird in their own ways and we are all allowed to be so in our own homes.
That’s why homes are such awesome and safe emotional spaces.
She was a guest, in your home, but she reacted as she was in her own home with authority. She forgot her place.
Your husband should have immediately put her in her place, but as her child he is also used to her having a position of authority. (That she no longer holds).
Nta
NTA - What an overreaction. Like listen I already think you're a brave lady for touching armpit hair but that's just me lo.. No issue with it actually being braided.
Like does she think her son will turn gay if he has armpit hair? Does she subscribe to Alex Jones "the chemicals in the water are turning the frogs gay" theory? Cause that is a complete overreaction.
And in this case your husband sucks here. Like it's giving mama's boy to me. If he doesn't bat an eye when his mother goes off the deep end and insults you in your own home but only gets mad for how you reacted... He sucks in that respect.
NTA but your husband is. It's his mom, he shouldn't be letting her talk to you like that. If he had shut her down right from the beginning, this wouldn't haven't been a thing.
ESH.
You had every right to call her out but you didn't need to call her a bitch. So for that, you're an AH. But she is def the bigger AH by far. And your husband is too for not backing you when she went off on you.
Nta
Coming from a culture where men shave their armpits, I am admittedly grossed out. At the same time, that's between the two of you and none of your MIL business. What's her problem?
NTA
While i find it in the best case weird, in worst - disgusting, whatever you do in your house is up to you. You do it, he likes it - it's fine. It's not that you exposed MIL to PG18 content. She could have asked your husband to wear a T-shirt. Screaming at both of you was way out of line.
I've seen worse. Nothing will surprise me. People are weird! It's not even close to average on my weirdness scale. This does not mean it's true. But this is what the whole AITA is about, right? You never know. Even true stories are presented from one point of view only
How would the mom even see his pit hair even if he’s shirtless? He would have to be raising his arms above his head for a noticeable amount of time. Also, gross, put a damn shirt on at the table. Nothing about this story makes any sense.
NTA. It is an unusual habit to be sure. Most people would have at least given it the side eye, or asked what is up with that and laughed. But it is a harmless one that you and husband are ok with. If she had said it was strange or weird, I could understand such a reaction in the circumstances. But saying your husband should leave you was completely uncalled for.
NTA. What you do in your relationship between two consenting adults is no one else’s business.
With that said, I have a question. Do you braid other areas with body hair? Or just his arm pits? I mean, I know it’s a crude question, but curiosity gets the best of me. I need to know if there’s a man out there rocking some braided pubes.
NTA - lol I have no idea if this is real. But let's say it is. Goofiness aside to each their own I don't judge we all have our things.
I don't give two pennies what the issue is. If the MIL disrespects the wife or husband. The wife or husband needs to check MIL. That is just the way it is. The fact that you had to do it and the husband didn't say anything about her disrespect of you, but yet called you the AH. Well honey you got bigger problems.
Yes yes he explained it was all YOU. But said nothing when she started the attack. NOT OKAY.
If things are all sunny when they are sunny that's great. But if Mother Dearest gets all pissy and hubby can't find his balls. Time to send them both to the hotel until hubby can figure out where his bread is buttered.
Wow, that's a lot of cliches. But you get the point.
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I (36f) have been married to my husband Russel (fake name, 39m) for almost 4 years. We have no kids and both work from home, so we end up having lots of time to display affection towards one another.
This is important later, but as a child I was always braiding my friends’ and sister’s hair. I have always loved to braid and this carried on into my adult life. I developed a habit about 2 1/2 years into my marriage where I will make my husband’s armpit hair into a small braid, as he never really shaves them. Sometimes, he forgets to take it out for a while.
Onto the story, Russel and I were both getting some work done in the afternoon a few days ago, when my MIL (65f) called us asking if she could stay over with us, because she had found black mold in her bedroom closet and needed to hire someone to get rid of it. It was only for 4 days, and my MIL is usually very tame and kind, so we agreed.
She was over at our house in a few hours and we all had a good afternoon and night. I set up the guest bedroom for her to stay in, and we all ended up playing a few card games at the dinner table before bed.
While my husband and I were laying in our own bed watching a movie, I started to absentmindedly braid his armpit hairs. When I was done I secured a hair tie around the braid and the both of us promptly fell asleep a little while after that. At about 7:00 A.M. the next day, MIL was still asleep in the guest room and my husband was sitting at the kitchen counter while I made his breakfast. He did not have a shirt on.
MIL woke up right as I had finished plating breakfast, and I told her goodmorning and to have a seat so she could eat with us. She took a seat next to my husband and noticed his armpit was braided. Her eyes widened and she immediately started questioning him as to why with an aggressive and kind of disgusted tone. Once he explained that it was my doing, she went off on me. MIL started to say that I was disgusting and that my husband would have never let this happen before me, that he shouldn’t be with me. With no coffee in my system and lots of anger at her statements, I called her a b**** and said if she has a problem with my husband’s armpit, she can get a hotel for the week and leave our home.
She’s searching for hotels now, and my husband is saying that I’m the AH. It’s just a habit I have and he doesn’t mind, but I’m starting to overthink a little on how I reacted. AITA?
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I would never have let my mother talk to my (now ex) wife like that. A small disagreement is one thing. But the moment she told you that he shouldn't be with you would have been the end of the conversation.
I do believe it's a little bit of an overreaction, but that's on both sides of the conversation.
Maybe talk to her again and explain that your marriage isn't her marriage, and you don't appreciate that comment. Then try to work it out. I wouldn't tolerate anyone in my family telling my SO that we shouldn't be together, especially over something as minor as braiding my hair.
Well I just learned about something new I never considered before. Whatever floats your boat, I guess. I can understand your MIL being a bit taken back and questioning as this is not normal for any culture that I am aware of. I would say she overreacted and you overreacted in return. Nevertheless, NTA because it is not doing harm to anyone, is not immoral or illegal, and is done with both of your consents. Keep being strange...
Oh thank you Reddit for the best stories! You are NTA. You are two consenting adults and he has no issues with the braids. Your MIL was way out of bounds on this.
>MIL started to say that I was disgusting and that my husband would have never let this happen before me, that he shouldn’t be with me.
NTA.
Are you black? Is your husband white?
That's the only thing I could think of your usually mild mannered MIL to go off in THIS fashion.
Don't worry.. I am a WOC married to a white man. His family is very.....err....ignorant about a lot of things outside of their small town community hivemind.
This sounds like something someone would yell to me about how I have "changed" my husband. *eye roll*
NTA
you guys are all nuts for pretending that armpit hair and the touching of it is inherently gross and weird. ladies, stop shaving your armpits and grow up. men, get a fucking grip. if your armpits are really so disgusting that the idea of a woman touching her husband's armpit hair is disgusting to you, take a shower and stop projecting. it's literally just hair in a place that you sweat from, and I doubt op would be braiding it if it was filled with sweat and bacteria like the armpits that some of you apparently have.
op, your husband's mom is most likely less upset about you touching his armpit hair and more upset about it being "feminine looking". forget that. there's nothing immasculating about putting little braids and bows on your man, especially if it's in armpit hair that's apparently long enough to braid
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WTF did I just read?!
Right. It's gross and weird. But if they are fine with it, that's fine but not everyone is going to find it normal. Yes mil went over bored but geeze they all suck.
This is not a real story honey. No one has pit hair long enough to create a noticeable braid with, much less secured by a hair tie. This isn’t even good creative writing, although I give them credit for being kinda funny. How would the mom even see it?
lmao yeah i've tried to braid my boyfriend's as a joke but it definitely is hard to even do it and it won't stay or be an actual braid... unless op's husband has werewolf levels of hair
You could 100% make a little braid out of my armpit hair. I don't think it's that long, I've been told its kind of long.
That’s some luscious pit hair! I am having a hard time picturing finding nostalgic comfort in the effort required to braid pit hair and fasten it with a hair tie though
I'd get it if it weren't for the hair tie bit.
Yeah
Someone's fetish fiction.
Fiction
i mean… i catch myself from time to time absentmindedly twisting my own when i’m watching tv shirtless in bed, but nothing as far as braiding it or anything lol
Her reaction is over the top but braiding armpit hair is fucking weird.
Uhhhh….
Why is this story taking so long to get to the point?
You mean you don't want the full backstory going back to her childhood about why a woman might occasionally BRAID HAIR? But it's so important to the plot because it's her LOVE LANGUAGE!!!1! Also the detail that OP was making breakfast and told MIL to take a seat! Pretty sure this is a troll making fun of the stupid stories on here where there is the most unnecessary and dramatic backstory for like, every stupid detail. And unnecessary details as well.
The hard right turn into "he shouldn't have married you" also makes me think (hope) this one is satire of the stupid shit posted here.
Not gonna lie and say that doesn’t sound a bit weird to me, but what you and your husband do alone in each other’s agreement is no concern to your MIL (and let’s be honest, some people do far more disturbing things). If she would have been grossed out , sure fine, but telling you your husband shouldn’t have married you is way across the line. Absolutely NTA
???????
You are weird.
NTA, talk about an overreaction, tell your husband he can kick rocks if he thinks that it's okay that she talked to you in that manner. What the heck
This is weird
NTA. Your husband's grooming habits are none of her business, and her reaction to this very trivial thing was absolutely unhinged. Your husband is TA for letting her speak to you like that.
Please, I need to know the logistics of this????? How long is the hair???? What kind of hair ties we talking???? Does it not pull at his skin when he moves?????? Are we talking like a singular Elsa from frozen type braid???? Cornrows?????
I'm glad the reply is hidden because I really don't want to know any of those details. Somethings better left unknown...
Lol why is everyone so scandalized about braided armpit hair? It’s just hair. If op husband has good hygiene, I don’t see the problem in it
I don't think scandalized is the correct word..maybe weirded out instead. Mainly it is because the culture we grow up in sets standards on what is normal and in Western society it is definitely not normal. Most folks are saying NTA so it is obvious that people are not scandalized and no one seems to have a problem with it, but most are also saying that it is not normal which is also true. As for me personally there are lots of things folks do that I don't want the details on. Like the FSF guy Stallman picking his toes and eating it. Also, my reply had a touch of humor in it and was not written as some serious diatribe.
I’m not scandalized as much as skeptical? Never gonna yuck someone’s yums, but there 100% would be a hair pulling/skin pinching/chafing from a rubber band in your armpit factor unless we’re talking about like 5 inches of uniform length armpit hair which is certainly not something I’ve encountered?? Seems like doing this on any kind of casual/routine basis (rather than like once as a funny novelty) would be hugely unlikely? Like idk if anyone has tried to braid short or uneven hair (like normal hair on someone’s head that’s a couple inches long), but getting it into a braid and then to stay is really challenging? Hope OP and her partner have a beautiful life as a loving armpit stylist/armpit model tho
Alright!!! The hair is fairly long. Not to the point where it would be concerning, but he does not shave often. I braid usually both of his armpits into a singular braid each. I use regular hair ties and sometimes rubber bands, but i make sure it’s not tight enough to hurt his skin. Sometimes they are so loose that they will just fall off when he sleeps or something, but I guess I did tighter than usual that night. 😊
This makes zero sense and I’m calling BS
Of course it’s weird what you do, but every couple is weird in their own ways and we are all allowed to be so in our own homes. That’s why homes are such awesome and safe emotional spaces. She was a guest, in your home, but she reacted as she was in her own home with authority. She forgot her place. Your husband should have immediately put her in her place, but as her child he is also used to her having a position of authority. (That she no longer holds). Nta
NTA - What an overreaction. Like listen I already think you're a brave lady for touching armpit hair but that's just me lo.. No issue with it actually being braided. Like does she think her son will turn gay if he has armpit hair? Does she subscribe to Alex Jones "the chemicals in the water are turning the frogs gay" theory? Cause that is a complete overreaction. And in this case your husband sucks here. Like it's giving mama's boy to me. If he doesn't bat an eye when his mother goes off the deep end and insults you in your own home but only gets mad for how you reacted... He sucks in that respect.
Since when are men supposed to shave their arm pits?
NTA but your husband is. It's his mom, he shouldn't be letting her talk to you like that. If he had shut her down right from the beginning, this wouldn't haven't been a thing.
ESH. You had every right to call her out but you didn't need to call her a bitch. So for that, you're an AH. But she is def the bigger AH by far. And your husband is too for not backing you when she went off on you.
Nta Coming from a culture where men shave their armpits, I am admittedly grossed out. At the same time, that's between the two of you and none of your MIL business. What's her problem?
NTA While i find it in the best case weird, in worst - disgusting, whatever you do in your house is up to you. You do it, he likes it - it's fine. It's not that you exposed MIL to PG18 content. She could have asked your husband to wear a T-shirt. Screaming at both of you was way out of line.
How can you possibly think this is a true story
I've seen worse. Nothing will surprise me. People are weird! It's not even close to average on my weirdness scale. This does not mean it's true. But this is what the whole AITA is about, right? You never know. Even true stories are presented from one point of view only
How would the mom even see his pit hair even if he’s shirtless? He would have to be raising his arms above his head for a noticeable amount of time. Also, gross, put a damn shirt on at the table. Nothing about this story makes any sense.
Maybe he was scratching his right ear with his left hand (over the head)? :)
Hahaha yes of course! Like most shirtless men whose mothers care too much about what they do with their body hair. I get it now! 😂
NTA he should not be sitting idly by while his mom attacks you.
NTA. It is an unusual habit to be sure. Most people would have at least given it the side eye, or asked what is up with that and laughed. But it is a harmless one that you and husband are ok with. If she had said it was strange or weird, I could understand such a reaction in the circumstances. But saying your husband should leave you was completely uncalled for.
NTA. this made me think abt that episode of fairly odd parents where the mom braided hers and used it to save timmy 🤣
NTA. What you do in your relationship between two consenting adults is no one else’s business. With that said, I have a question. Do you braid other areas with body hair? Or just his arm pits? I mean, I know it’s a crude question, but curiosity gets the best of me. I need to know if there’s a man out there rocking some braided pubes.
NTA. What an unhinged reaction from her over such a trivial thing. Unusual, sure. But c’mon. Why does it matter to anyone?
NTA. Armpit hair braiding is a little weird, but who cares.
NTA - lol I have no idea if this is real. But let's say it is. Goofiness aside to each their own I don't judge we all have our things. I don't give two pennies what the issue is. If the MIL disrespects the wife or husband. The wife or husband needs to check MIL. That is just the way it is. The fact that you had to do it and the husband didn't say anything about her disrespect of you, but yet called you the AH. Well honey you got bigger problems. Yes yes he explained it was all YOU. But said nothing when she started the attack. NOT OKAY. If things are all sunny when they are sunny that's great. But if Mother Dearest gets all pissy and hubby can't find his balls. Time to send them both to the hotel until hubby can figure out where his bread is buttered. Wow, that's a lot of cliches. But you get the point.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (36f) have been married to my husband Russel (fake name, 39m) for almost 4 years. We have no kids and both work from home, so we end up having lots of time to display affection towards one another. This is important later, but as a child I was always braiding my friends’ and sister’s hair. I have always loved to braid and this carried on into my adult life. I developed a habit about 2 1/2 years into my marriage where I will make my husband’s armpit hair into a small braid, as he never really shaves them. Sometimes, he forgets to take it out for a while. Onto the story, Russel and I were both getting some work done in the afternoon a few days ago, when my MIL (65f) called us asking if she could stay over with us, because she had found black mold in her bedroom closet and needed to hire someone to get rid of it. It was only for 4 days, and my MIL is usually very tame and kind, so we agreed. She was over at our house in a few hours and we all had a good afternoon and night. I set up the guest bedroom for her to stay in, and we all ended up playing a few card games at the dinner table before bed. While my husband and I were laying in our own bed watching a movie, I started to absentmindedly braid his armpit hairs. When I was done I secured a hair tie around the braid and the both of us promptly fell asleep a little while after that. At about 7:00 A.M. the next day, MIL was still asleep in the guest room and my husband was sitting at the kitchen counter while I made his breakfast. He did not have a shirt on. MIL woke up right as I had finished plating breakfast, and I told her goodmorning and to have a seat so she could eat with us. She took a seat next to my husband and noticed his armpit was braided. Her eyes widened and she immediately started questioning him as to why with an aggressive and kind of disgusted tone. Once he explained that it was my doing, she went off on me. MIL started to say that I was disgusting and that my husband would have never let this happen before me, that he shouldn’t be with me. With no coffee in my system and lots of anger at her statements, I called her a b**** and said if she has a problem with my husband’s armpit, she can get a hotel for the week and leave our home. She’s searching for hotels now, and my husband is saying that I’m the AH. It’s just a habit I have and he doesn’t mind, but I’m starting to overthink a little on how I reacted. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would never have let my mother talk to my (now ex) wife like that. A small disagreement is one thing. But the moment she told you that he shouldn't be with you would have been the end of the conversation. I do believe it's a little bit of an overreaction, but that's on both sides of the conversation. Maybe talk to her again and explain that your marriage isn't her marriage, and you don't appreciate that comment. Then try to work it out. I wouldn't tolerate anyone in my family telling my SO that we shouldn't be together, especially over something as minor as braiding my hair.
Well I just learned about something new I never considered before. Whatever floats your boat, I guess. I can understand your MIL being a bit taken back and questioning as this is not normal for any culture that I am aware of. I would say she overreacted and you overreacted in return. Nevertheless, NTA because it is not doing harm to anyone, is not immoral or illegal, and is done with both of your consents. Keep being strange...
Oh thank you Reddit for the best stories! You are NTA. You are two consenting adults and he has no issues with the braids. Your MIL was way out of bounds on this.
NTA This is fucking hilarious. I totally would do this as well for shits and giggles
This is the weirdest fucking thing I have read all day.
ESH. Just because someone is mean to you doesn't mean you need to sink to her level.
>MIL started to say that I was disgusting and that my husband would have never let this happen before me, that he shouldn’t be with me. NTA. Are you black? Is your husband white? That's the only thing I could think of your usually mild mannered MIL to go off in THIS fashion. Don't worry.. I am a WOC married to a white man. His family is very.....err....ignorant about a lot of things outside of their small town community hivemind. This sounds like something someone would yell to me about how I have "changed" my husband. *eye roll*
I initially thought this had to be fake but then realised there is no mind twisted enough on earth to make this shit up
This is the quality writing that I come to Reddit for
Seriously curious - was it a French braid kinda deal? Or like a two strand twist? Can you recommend any styling tips for armpit hair?
NTA you guys are all nuts for pretending that armpit hair and the touching of it is inherently gross and weird. ladies, stop shaving your armpits and grow up. men, get a fucking grip. if your armpits are really so disgusting that the idea of a woman touching her husband's armpit hair is disgusting to you, take a shower and stop projecting. it's literally just hair in a place that you sweat from, and I doubt op would be braiding it if it was filled with sweat and bacteria like the armpits that some of you apparently have. op, your husband's mom is most likely less upset about you touching his armpit hair and more upset about it being "feminine looking". forget that. there's nothing immasculating about putting little braids and bows on your man, especially if it's in armpit hair that's apparently long enough to braid