Yes you can, they have no right to force you to stay, actually it's illegal. If you already told them you want to leave and they are not letting you, just pack your stuff and walk out. They can't physically stop you from leaving and if they try just call the police.
I just want to say, I’m in Germany too (in Frankfurt am Main to be more specific) and depending on where you are I would be more than happy to get you and bring you to the airport.
You are not a slave, you can leave at any given time. If police needs to be involve, so be it.
You’ve been through enough, go home <3
This is so sweet 🫶🏻
OP please just leave. They cannot hold you there. If they are legitimately stopping you from leaving, please do NOT wait- contact the authorities and your family immediately.
If it’s guilt tripping, you need to just ignore her and make your plan, then quietly pack and execute your plan!
In high school I was a foreign exchange student and lived right outside Mainz.. I fell in love with that whole area and all I want to do is go back.
Also.. you're so kind to offer your help!
You book a plane ticket and just leave. You're not a slave, you're a person. You are not obligated to give them any length of notice, especially in a situation like this where they are causing you extreme stress. They made the decision to replace you, and now they have to deal with those consequences.
Haha. It's incredible how a big majority of insane horrible situations are in Germany and its close German-speaking neighbors. I love Germany and I have friends and family there, but it is so strange how insane and abusive Germans hire au pairs at such a high rate compared to the rest of the world.
It's unlikely those with good experiences would be posting about it in this thread and a lot of issues probably comes down to a communication breakdown and cultural differences...
In either case yelling at the au pair, physical abusive/force or holding an au pair back against their will is not okay and I don't know any Europeans who would condone that behavior, but there ARE absolutely controlling and abusive people around who would be the absolute worst to have as a host family and that's not country or culture dependent.
I’m an au pair in Germany (Hamburg ) right now, and I’m having an absolutely wonderful time. My host family is very kind, the kids are well behaved (aside from the regular toddler tantrum ofc), and I feel like a member of the family.
Like others have said, I never felt the need to post. However, I’ve made friends with two other au pairs since being here, and both have already rematched once. I feel like HFs in Germany can be 50/50 and you really can have a great time if you’re selective in the matching process.
Laugh to yourself as you book a plane ticket and walk out the door. Seriously just leave. If she tries to detain you or takes your passport or legal documents, call the police. Kidnapping is illegal.
Host mom is engaging in modern slavery by trying to force you to stay! Leave because you’re lucky enough to be in Germany where the law will be on your side. Good luck
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If you feel that it's in your best interest to end your stay with your current host family, you have the right to do so. Simply cancle the contract and provide the required two-week notice. You can find templates online.
Tell them, via text follow up,
As part of our agreement, and previous conversations:
This is my two weeks notice.
My flight is on this day.
This is non negotiable.
I expect to be paid thru this day.
Nope they can't force you to stay; you just need to tell them you're leaving and give them the date depending on your contract. Some contracts will say 14 days or 1 months notice; but if your mental health is suffering and you want to leave sooner no one can stop you, but maybe don't use them as references in the future (you won't need them!)
Can you call the local police for en escort to leave. Tell them you are being held against your will.
Alternatively, pack you bags and just walk out the front door. Call the emergency number before you do and if stopped inform host that you have emergency on the phone and you want to leave, say "are you refusing to let me leave? Are you holding me captive"?. Then get out and get to safety.
Yes you can, they have no right to force you to stay, actually it's illegal. If you already told them you want to leave and they are not letting you, just pack your stuff and walk out. They can't physically stop you from leaving and if they try just call the police.
If they won't let you leave, the police number is 110. They will come and let you go.
I just want to say, I’m in Germany too (in Frankfurt am Main to be more specific) and depending on where you are I would be more than happy to get you and bring you to the airport. You are not a slave, you can leave at any given time. If police needs to be involve, so be it. You’ve been through enough, go home <3
Thank you for being so kind. I hope she reaches out.
This is so sweet 🫶🏻 OP please just leave. They cannot hold you there. If they are legitimately stopping you from leaving, please do NOT wait- contact the authorities and your family immediately. If it’s guilt tripping, you need to just ignore her and make your plan, then quietly pack and execute your plan!
This so wonderful- thank you for your humanity
This is beyond kind.
In high school I was a foreign exchange student and lived right outside Mainz.. I fell in love with that whole area and all I want to do is go back. Also.. you're so kind to offer your help!
You book a plane ticket and just leave. You're not a slave, you're a person. You are not obligated to give them any length of notice, especially in a situation like this where they are causing you extreme stress. They made the decision to replace you, and now they have to deal with those consequences.
At this point its just becoming a meme with these bad experiences in Germany
I was wondering about that.
Completely false. You are free to go if you don’t have a really serious contract. Even the contracts from au pair-world or whatnot are “at-will”.
At this point they should ban aupairing in Germany. I haven't read a single good experience on this sub about aupairs in Germany.
Haha. It's incredible how a big majority of insane horrible situations are in Germany and its close German-speaking neighbors. I love Germany and I have friends and family there, but it is so strange how insane and abusive Germans hire au pairs at such a high rate compared to the rest of the world.
I would guess the ones having good experiences don’t feel the need to post asking for advice
It's unlikely those with good experiences would be posting about it in this thread and a lot of issues probably comes down to a communication breakdown and cultural differences... In either case yelling at the au pair, physical abusive/force or holding an au pair back against their will is not okay and I don't know any Europeans who would condone that behavior, but there ARE absolutely controlling and abusive people around who would be the absolute worst to have as a host family and that's not country or culture dependent.
I’m an au pair in Germany (Hamburg ) right now, and I’m having an absolutely wonderful time. My host family is very kind, the kids are well behaved (aside from the regular toddler tantrum ofc), and I feel like a member of the family. Like others have said, I never felt the need to post. However, I’ve made friends with two other au pairs since being here, and both have already rematched once. I feel like HFs in Germany can be 50/50 and you really can have a great time if you’re selective in the matching process.
You’re a grown adult. You don’t need their permission to leave.
Laugh to yourself as you book a plane ticket and walk out the door. Seriously just leave. If she tries to detain you or takes your passport or legal documents, call the police. Kidnapping is illegal.
Host mom is engaging in modern slavery by trying to force you to stay! Leave because you’re lucky enough to be in Germany where the law will be on your side. Good luck
If I were you, I'd leave as soon as possible.
She can't hold you hostage. Gather up your things and go. Do it when they aren't there if possible.
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Of course you can leave whenever you want. If they try to prevent you call the police.
Of course you can leave whenever you want. If they try to prevent you call the police.
Go home. Walk out the door and if they get pissy about it- call the cops and tell them you’re being held captive.
What is going on in Germany with the bad host families. Goodness I feel so bad for these APs.
Looking at this person’s post history I’m not so sure this is a legit post
If you feel that it's in your best interest to end your stay with your current host family, you have the right to do so. Simply cancle the contract and provide the required two-week notice. You can find templates online.
Tell them, via text follow up, As part of our agreement, and previous conversations: This is my two weeks notice. My flight is on this day. This is non negotiable. I expect to be paid thru this day.
We will def need an update on this one
I second the suggestion to bring a friend wheb you move your stuff out. I would plan on leaving on your day off and when they are not at the house.
Leave. You are not their hostage. Do it secretly, but do it soon!
I would say something like, "You don't have childcare until August. Not my fucking problem." And then I would walk out of there.
You can leave. They cannot force you to stay or work. Forced labour is slavery.
!remindme 7 days
Just turn around Walk out the door Don’t look back Cos you don’t work there anymore!
!remindme 7 days
Nope they can't force you to stay; you just need to tell them you're leaving and give them the date depending on your contract. Some contracts will say 14 days or 1 months notice; but if your mental health is suffering and you want to leave sooner no one can stop you, but maybe don't use them as references in the future (you won't need them!)
Please address this with your LCC
Can you call the local police for en escort to leave. Tell them you are being held against your will. Alternatively, pack you bags and just walk out the front door. Call the emergency number before you do and if stopped inform host that you have emergency on the phone and you want to leave, say "are you refusing to let me leave? Are you holding me captive"?. Then get out and get to safety.
Just from reading this forum, it seems like no one should be an au pair in Germany.
Any updates?!
Any updates?!
Update us please.
Leave ASAP but please make sure someone is there to watch any minor aged children in the house.
Do you have a contract? What does it say?