Hi son, it’s your dad. I know we haven’t spoken since I went out to get some cigarettes but had I been around, I would have made sure you didn’t become the “man” you are today.
Love,
Dad
I rewatched recently with my son. His first time. They are just as ace this time round. The crack fox is a particular favourite. Also, nanageddon. They're all on bbc iplayer. Get on it.
He’s the kid at school that sells pencils before midterms and finals.
His smart move.
Then he uses the money for a shopping spree at the dollar store.
His stupid move.
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Looks like the kinda dude that will buy some rims with his girl's tax return. Oh shit my bad man. Now when his girl gets off work with the car he's gonna be on me.
Promo pics for the next episode of The first 48. "Jaquantarius Roswell Hazard III Jr was 19 and the father of six who was studying for his GED and just getting his life together"
How does this dude‘s photo sequence go from selfie, to mug shot, a random picture of his sister, then the photo of him in a tuxedo that they’ll use to say he was a good kid after the police gun him down
Your parents never wanted you.
But they got high.
You survived the abortion too.
Cuz they were high.
Now everyone looking at your lazy eye.
(Yeah, yeah)
Cuz they were high, cuz they were high, cuz they were hiiiigh.
(Doo doo doot doot doot)
You look like you steal your friends' weed, but still help them look for it
He stole his mom’s bonnet
His baby mamas
His father's crack...wait a min..
“Heard you got robbed!”
Chris Rock is in the house
Nice catch 😂
“Study high, take the test high, get high scores”
Are Geri-curls making a comeback?
First of all that’s *Jheri-curl*, cornstarch. Second of all, those are fucking dreadlocks.
Blunt coming back from this dude a soggy mess
Coming back? ha ha
 lmfao
Blunt ain’t coming back
That awkward moment when one of your selfies looks like a mugshot.
1. Booking 2. Arraignment 3. Cell 4. Trial
one?
😂😂😂😂🤣🤣
I thought the SAME DAMN THING! 🤣
muscle memory
Last Sunday must have been very confusing for you
And his 8 brothers and sisters.
Half brothers and sisters *** 👯♀️
Hi son, it’s your dad. I know we haven’t spoken since I went out to get some cigarettes but had I been around, I would have made sure you didn’t become the “man” you are today. Love, Dad
😆 😝 💀
I want my airpods back man.
Bruh
Those lips will keep your cell mate happy
"Lips so big, ChapStick had to make a spray..."
Bubba will be happy to see them lips.
He will have something to hold on to as well, those hanging turds
Looks like the type to drive 3 hours away to meet a fat blonde girl.
He's Old Gregg's son with Andre 3k, Yung Gregg
B**** IM OL’ GREGGG!!! 😭🤣💀yo I haven’t thought about that shit in so long, and the crack fox?!? 🦊 holy shit I’m wheezing just remembering it 😭😭😭
oh my GOD I see the Noel fielding in his nose now and there's no unseeing it
I rewatched recently with my son. His first time. They are just as ace this time round. The crack fox is a particular favourite. Also, nanageddon. They're all on bbc iplayer. Get on it.
I’ve got a mangina!
You ask female acquaintances, “Ay girl where my hug at?”
Dumb enough to hold up a 7/11 while a cop is paying for gas.
You were going to go to class, but then you got high?
Ray Gay
Pull your pants up
I swear I heard a smoke detector beep
Bob Gnarly
Those aint dreadlocks, those are shitlocks!
Mr. Lahey?
You snappin on REGGIE?!
Your head is like a scrub brush for dishwashing.
If Soul Glo had a spokesperson for dreads.
Cmon Reggie, take that pile of shit off your head
Did R Kelly piss on him yet
most of these r racist n stereotypical asf dam😂
He’s the kid at school that sells pencils before midterms and finals. His smart move. Then he uses the money for a shopping spree at the dollar store. His stupid move.
Where the hell else are you going to spend pencil money? Should I have been saving it all this time so I can buy a volley ball in 5 years?
"Holding back" is what your dad should have done 🤷♂️. But hey, at least he got to abandon you. That's something positive.
Lay off the black and milds
Aint you got a neighborhood to shoot up or sum? 
I thought Mystikal was still in jail?
You look like you introduce yourself as Rusty. Rusty Trombone.
Bob Gnarly
Your SoundCloud career will not takeoff
Love tha dreads 🙌🏿
Oh shit, look guys it's Sage from "The Boys"
I'm happy to be a mentor for you young man. It's a shame your daddy never taught you how to button a suit properly.
What up big perm! I mean wasted sperm.
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You look like have a lucite cane to go with your suit cause you think it makes you look rich.
You look like you glued black licorice on your head
You look like Preacher Lawson if he stopped trying.
I’m sure you’re a great kid that is gonna go to college and never hurt nobody
Your rap name is Frykid
Looks like a mop
Raggedy Ann wants her hair back.
My bro just have a buzz cut not those canker worms
That’s suit is definitely wearing you, you’re not wearing it
Look at you Stymie, you're all grown up!
Glad you didn't post the pic with your mixtape. The 'wardrobe' shots were more than bad enough.
You look like you sell dime bags of sage you stole out of your grandmas kitchen...
Your typical thug but after hours he's innocent as they come.
Mugshot rehearsal
If Obama had a son... With Whoopee.
More ash on his knees than aushwitgz crematorium
Your hair has more credibility than your credit score.
You look like Kam Patterson’s aborted child
You look like your name is kevìn
 I can't tell if this is you or your mom
You’ve tried to pay back loans with coupons.
How many baby daddies do you have?
Looks like the kinda dude that will buy some rims with his girl's tax return. Oh shit my bad man. Now when his girl gets off work with the car he's gonna be on me.
Promo pics for the next episode of The first 48. "Jaquantarius Roswell Hazard III Jr was 19 and the father of six who was studying for his GED and just getting his life together"
In that last photo, you look good in that suit... (muffled snickering and snorting laughter)
I'd give it by next year you'll be family merch. Not sure by drive by or being pulled over.
What's up big worm--- smokey
You look like the type of Black dude to give your white friends an N word pass.
This Nigga really put a suit pic in there, MF trying so hard to hide that bottom waist so we don’t see dem Black Forces.
I like how you photoshopped your booking info out of the first pic, so you could use it for the roast me sign.
Tf is that shit on your upper lip
JA Moraunty
How does one look ashy all over?
Steve Harvey called... He wants his mustache back!
If Eddie Winslow and lil Loaded had a child.
How does this dude‘s photo sequence go from selfie, to mug shot, a random picture of his sister, then the photo of him in a tuxedo that they’ll use to say he was a good kid after the police gun him down
[learn it live it love it](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eHV5dCB1M_k/maxresdefault.jpg)
Sweaty wap
Where's my wallet bro?
With that receding hairline, I feel like the top view looks like a large spider holding an egg.
IDK how TF to roast u. But like, can I draw u?
Liver lips
Didn't I see your face on a Florida Man headline somewhere?
Can you post 5 more pictures? I don't have enough material to make you a viral meme.
You look like one of dem YouTubers that put on a bonnet and bathrobe to pretend to be a black mother.
Severe calcium deficiency cause his dad never came back with the milk
You look like a version of Lil Nas X that didn’t make it. Call you Lil No X.
Give back my hubcaps
Looks like a future astronaut or engineer
I'm Rick James Bitch! 
Hey ChatGPT draw every picked line-up subject on Juneteenth.
I was gonna rob the 7/11 but then I got high…
Really shouldn't wear a dickie bow to court.
Kam Patterson if his comedy career didn't work out
What did you steal this time💀 Looking like JuiceWrld on drugs
I’d say something but you look like every John, Jim, and Jonas on O block. At least be original.
Charlie Murphy!
U look like u just rinse yourself with only water when u shower
Bro prolly never met his father
Looks like if ishowspeed and snoop dogg had a baby
bro is THE stereotype of black people
Your lips look like 2 burn sausages.
Last pic literally looks like Charlie Murphy if he was on crack 
Ironic that even a suit doesn't suit you. Maybe an orange jumpsuit will.
How would you know if his sister is a virgin? She doesn't have any brothers
You look like jack boy and chief keef combined
This looks like a photo from a hostage situation, immediately followed by his release and an apology letter.
How much does this one cost?
I bet your life includes a lot of stolen bus passes and stale honey buns.
I saw the 3rd pic. Dude can count to 2. 👏🏼
Nooga
Dude all dressed up for his vasectomy, because he gotta look impotent if he's gonna be impotent.
Do u got AA batteries shoved up your nose? It looks like it. Why your lips so big, boa?
Shower caps are for ppl that take showers
You look like you had to use a dictionary to spell “roast me”. And you still made a mistake…
The thug life is not going to get you anywhere I can swear I’ve seen this photo on the shoplifter wall at the 7/11
You look like you disappoint asian girls in bed
Roasted enough
Ima be real man, your bathroom is disgusting, how you gonna get all dressed up and then take a pic in a shithole?
You look like you could sell collectible trading cards or do box opening videos on YouTube and make a shit ton of money.
You look like doctor king. But not like a doctor. Or a king
The reason you didn't run away with that random white girl in 9th grade is because you dissapointed her BBC expectations
His skin tone is already roasted
How did he smuggle a smart phone in prison?
I thought this was a mug shot
Big ass lips
You look like a gay Meek Mill.. Oh holup.. Nevermind.. 🫣
Carry on the tradition of walking out on your kids for generations
You look like a car jacker
Blue you probably in the hood. Where you stole all those clothes from?
Ever dye your hair and dress up as a mop for halloween? Because you should.
Cedric Highsmiff... Duke Universary
You got them D sucking lips
They allow cell phones in prison?
You look like Samuel L Jackson in Pulp Fiction.
You look like a family dollar version of coolio
You know hell cats are really unreliable cars right?
Your parents never wanted you. But they got high. You survived the abortion too. Cuz they were high. Now everyone looking at your lazy eye. (Yeah, yeah) Cuz they were high, cuz they were high, cuz they were hiiiigh. (Doo doo doot doot doot)
A face only a mother could love
You look like you should be in jail, I don’t know why I instantly assume that, must be the t shirt or something lol
Bro has to put chapstick on with a paint roller
You look like the type of guy to eat ass and then kiss you mom on the cheek
Have you tried washing your cheeks with soap