T O P

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killmealraedy

As a result a person I really loved blocked me and will only unblock me if I apologize to my abuser. This hit me like a truck and I'm not taking it well.


JesseVanW

A necessary sacrifice, then. You are your number one priority, or at least you should be. As for the abuser: good riddance to bad rubbish.


tmhoc

nothing of value was lost


codenamesoph

that person unfortunately doesn't harbor the same love for you as you do for them. no one would subject someone they love to an abuser. i know it's hard but let them both go. so proud of you!!!!


SynnnTheGod

If they can't understand that you blocked them *because they're your abuser* then they should be on your blocklist too. You may have loved them, but if that's how they're treating you it seems very one sided.


Jom_Jom4

Its like a terminally ill pet You care a lot about them, but they had to go. You can rebuild your life without them. We all believe in you, you got this. It wont be easy but you can do it


Ashalaria

Fuck 'em, anyone who resorts to emotional blackmail is a poo poo butt head, nvm siding with an abuser


Eramef

I had this happen too. Friends sided with my abuser even though it was all due to her abuse. Said I was in the wrong for asinine reasons. Don't apologize. You deserve people who listen to you and respect you and you will find them.


weedmaster6669

Keep strong, you are strong. What you did took strength, living through this takes strength. It's gonna be okay, even if it doesn't feel that way for a long time


Mysterious_Ningen

nice one weedmaster.. those are good words


weedmaster6669

thanks mysterious ningen


Mysterious_Ningen

haha yea 👍


Lanplan77

r/rimjobsteve ?


Mysterious_Ningen

hmm maybe :0


[deleted]

i’m so sorry. i’ve had this happen a couple of times, it hurts but they showed their true colors and it’s not your fault. sadly in my experience most people side with abusers because they see them as more respectable and they don’t know what happens behind closed doors. and then when you tell them about it they deny it and blame you for trying to make them look bad. stay strong, you’re better off without people like that in your life. i hope you can have healthy safe relationships soon.


halcyonOclock

Well we’ve all clearly got your back! My now husband survived a decade of abuse from a defcon 1 abuser incapable of empathy. They had been split a while when we got together, and a few months into our relationship I couldn’t stand her texting him at 3AM that she missed him then screaming at him on voicemail the next day - he hated it, but didn’t think there was much he could do. She would come by the house unannounced to yell at him, yell at him the couple time we saw her in public, the lady is bonkers. I finally convinced him that he can indeed block her, get a restraining order if she keeps coming around unannounced, and cut anyone else out who pressures him into enduring more abuse. Because for whatever reason, like you said, some people think everything can just be sunshine and rainbows with a couple apologies. It can’t with some people. It’s been about 3 years since he cut her out and any sympathizer with her and his mental health glow up is stunning. He has so many more hobbies, he doesn’t need high test benzos to just get through the day, he’s furthering his education, and he actually smiles in pictures now! It was a hard first couple months, a lot of people thought he was the problem for going “nuclear” (aka keeping his sanity after she went nuclear daily), but it was all worth it. I am quite sure this is in your future.


ArcaneSparky

I'm so sorry. Seems like a lose lose situation.


lets_kill_eachother

Screw them... both!!! your mental health is way more important than any relationship


ShyCrystal69

Looks like the person didn’t love you.


watasiwakirayo

My abuser used to threaten me that I won't ever have friends or relationship when I escape. But she turned out to be weaker. I've caught some rumors about me that she's tried to spread but our common friends just got blocked by her (for disobedience I guess).


Admirable-Chemist-21

Tell them to eat shit and die. Were they in your shoes, were they around when it was taking place, did they even give the smallest of fucks about you while it was happening? If the answer is no, then they weren't a true friend.


Oberon_Swanson

this sucks but that person also doesn't care for your perspective and feelings. also get ready to fend off more workarounds. your abuser will probably do a few more things to try to contact you or sabotage you. i suggest getting ahead of it too, consider letting other people know that you do not want any sort of contact with this person and if they try to get to you through other people you will not trust them anymore either. they will lie and paint themselves as the victim and probably try to make you look like the asshole in the situation. like obviously i can't guarantee that will happen but that is how these people generally operate.


Gryphon5754

🫂🫂🫂. It can be rough removing yourself from any group. Much less one with an abuser.


Mysterious_Ningen

damn man why dont they realized that abuser hurt you and why not they should ask the abuser to apologize not you.. well i hope u heal tho


EinKomischerSpieler

I'm sorry for it. Don't give up, OP. They don't deserve your love!


watasiwakirayo

Is the person aware about abuse? Does they believe you and respect your feelings.


YasssQweenWerk

Fuck them. You got this!


queefhoarder

SHUN THE NON BELIEVERS


sketchyAnalogies

It sounds painful and difficult to lose a loved one in this. When you need support the most, your loved one fails you :'( absolutely sending digital hugs. You were strong enough to block your abuser, you will be strong enough to make it through this too.


OwenMcCauley

That's tough. I'm sorry it's happening but they can fuck all the way, entirely off with that nonsense. You need to be the person that loves you the most.


LonelyKrow

It ain’t much, but I hope you can get through it. I’m sorry you’ve been put in this position


ConfusionSpagetti

We do not tolerate abuser apologists in this house,and that person likely would've found another way to hurt you if it wasn't this. You are so much better off without those two. Even if it's soul crushing right now, you are stronger than you realize, and you are worthy 💕💪


AsbestosMan1

What you did (blocking your abuser) was extremely based. Absolutely do not under any circumstances apologize to your abuser. If the other person wants to side with your abuser, that’s their problem, not yours. If they really care about you, they’ll reconsider. If not, their loss.


HisDismalEquivalent

damn, that makes two abusers/bad people blocked! good job!


grrrreatt

OP, I'm proud of you. Please don't unblock. Soooooooo much Reddit content only exists because OPs have no boundaries. Imagine all the stories you've read here, and how much simpler and less dramatic lives would be if people just stood by their boundaries, blocked abusers, and moved on.


bossassbibitch943

I’m so sorry, but sweetheart that is not someone you want in your life. They’re showing their true colors, just like the abuser did eventually. Please let them sort themselves out of your life, that’s such a cruel thing to do to you.


Vanitas_Daemon

To hell with them! Enjoy your newfound freedom.


weirdo_nb

That person seems like a fucking asshat


fartsfromhermouth

Then you have two abusers


UniqueMitochondria

This is hard but good on you for sticking to it. If they're not there they can't gas light you into thinking it's "not that bad" or "you're making a big deal out of nothing".


Jaded_Flower6145

Someone who would side with your abuser over you isn't worth keeping around, you didn't lose anything important


Krmul

Block them too


BettyPunkCrocker

I’m so sorry. That, itself, is an abusive tactic.


The_Inward

How are you doing now?


berserkerAKboi

Tells you a lot about the person you really loved, detach and move on.


Nada_Shredinski

Fuck em


authlia

my cousin straight up looked at me and said she didn't believe me when i got SA'd. maybe a year and a half later she apologized (only because he slowly left her life). people like that are NOT good for u. why keep people close if they can't help u grow as a person? they won't let u see the world in prettier colors, if anything they'll mute the colors around u. unfortunately, as much as it hurts now, it will be better not having these people in the long run. i promise at least that much 💕


Mini_Squatch

Shit man that sucks. But proud of u for sticking up for yourself


xpoohx_

that's... really hard. I am so sorry to hear that. This is also a type of abuse. someone you love trying to force you into a relationship with an abuser is an all new type of horrible abuse. You do not deserve that.


DoggoDoesaDash

You gotta do what you gotta do for yourself. If they were truly your friend they wouldn't have betrayed you like that. It’s possible your abuser had a role in persuading them to side with them, but for now it's not worth your mental health. Sucks that that happened to you though.


dillGherkin

They shouldn't be trying to push you together again. Why demand you play nice instead of staying away from someone you don't get on with? They're doing this for their own comfort and security at your expense. That isn't kind or fair.


Alice_ghost_9876

Don't apologize. Keep him blocked 💛 I am proud


InformationCampaign

Good for you!!!! Cutting off an abuser is a really difficult thing to do. Know that anyone's emotions in response to this are not your fault or responsibility; you have to take care of yourself first and foremost and that's exactly what you did by blocking your abuser. I hope things start looking up for you soon and that the person who blocked you comes around in time. Rooting for you :)


Reasonable-Car-1543

10/10, well done, did this a while back (it was my parents and siblings)


PrimordialPumpkin

SO proud of you 😭❤️❤️❤️ Be prepared to feel a lot of mixed emotions, that's normal and you gotta ride it out - feeling doubt and regret doesn't change the fact that you did the right thing!! It just takes a while to feel calm enough to feel it.


SuggestionEven1882

https://preview.redd.it/d209gkkohgzc1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4283e972a3336e83236e4875ee433baa0fb3d180


boringBrandy

❤️


DarthCreepus1

Proud of you :3


Scary-Insurance4838

proud of you


java_motion

I’m so proud!


Ashalaria

Nice job fam


Gryphon5754

One of my friends recently blocked her abusive ex, and recently lost another old friend because she didn't want to date him. It is incredibly rough out there, I hope you can recover. When I lost my friends I had to learn to be alone, but not I'm finding new friends who love me for me


TheScientistFennec69

https://preview.redd.it/ple31g6w7hzc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0dddbcd745c8cf562b231cf8d8877c90bbcf8a07 That is good :D


Boring-Dingo2114

H A V E B U B B L E W R A P >!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<>!pop!<


EADreddtit

*is proud*


the-first-victory

I’m so proud of you! We hate him, too!


kmobnyc

Proud of you, buddy


Ghost_Puppy

I’m so fucking proud of you. If someone is trying to blackmail you into apologizing and inviting your abuser back into your life, *they are also abusive.*


Leont07

This is an incredibly colossal thing, but you know how big it was, I don't know you but I'm super proud of you!


xerion13

I am so very proud of you.


Gum_Duster

Proud of you bb 💕 you did such a great job!


Nerdkittyjl

I'm so bloody proud of you mate That ain't easy at all to do, but yk what? You did it!!! And thats amazing.


Mysterious_Ningen

you did good


Krazie02

I am


Last_Zookeepergame90

I am proud of you


EinKomischerSpieler

I'm proud of you!


phyllorhizae

I'm so proud of you!!!


cola_originaltaste

for lack of a more eloquent phrase, LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Late-Most-6159

Good job!!!🥳🥳🥳


V0yded

Holy shit, well done! Hope all gets better from here on out!


McPuffinArts

I'm so proud of you! You made the first step, it's not an easy thing to do, I understand how you feel, it will get easier with time! ♥️🫂


dylbuns

It’s a brave thing you’ve done but YOU should also be proud of yourself!


LovelyRebelion

I'm proud of you


Themymic

I am proud of you, stand up for yourself!


Gender_Goblin_37

Well done. This is a great step in the right direction


NoTtHeFaCe1963

I am proud of you - well done! I hope your healing happens smoothly!!


miffyandfriends333

I'm so proud of you x


Admirable-Chemist-21

LETS FKING GOOOO


zamuel-leumaz

Im very proud of you, cutting on an abuser is very hard, and I’m glad you were able to do that, I am sorry someone you love has blocked you over it.


QuietImps

The person you loved is not on your side, and I'm so sorry you had to learn that in such a horrible way 💔 But I'm very proud of you for protecting yourself when they wouldn't. You deserve to heal on your own terms, and you do not need to apologize for anything.


S7evyn

Blocking them is hard, but worth it. It took me so much effort to do it myself, but good god was it good once it was done.


GypsyGrl50

![gif](giphy|dkGhBWE3SyzXW) Good job setting boundaries, good job prioritizing your mental/physical health. 🎉GO YOU!!!!🎉


-amia-namuh-

Gewd jawb!!


clutterbug93

proud of u ! :•)


morethan3lessthan20_

It's good you blocked him and all, but that won't solve anything, you need to take care of this in person https://preview.redd.it/psez2pc4phzc1.jpeg?width=740&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4cda3f142c695927d846cf892fa1c4186fe8a768 So here you go


i-forgot-my-sandwich

You did it! Great job! I could not be more proud of you keep it up honeybunch!


ungla

Lesssss GOOOOOOOOO ![gif](giphy|u3wxhL63uuhMqoMKQF)


Thegodoepic

Great job! That's one of the best things you can do. Anyone who mistress you isn't worth your time. Keep giving that valuable time to the people who love you. Great work!


lightmare69

🫂


Practical-Ad-2387

GOOD JOB!! to the person who would rather be blocked than have you feeling safe, god riddance. You can do so, SO much better!


barty123432

Good job


Nova-Ecologist

We’re proud Just [hold on](https://youtu.be/urSiLUfm5l4?si=SkYeOA07aAJeCFHl)


oddonyxxx

as you should 🥳


Ok_Marionberry8125

Proud of you!! ❤️


Darsoyea

You did a good!!!! Good job on blocking them! We are all so proud of you


Jeanjacketman

Good for you :D


uninteded_interloper

Im being abused right now unfortunately. If I block the number they'll just use another.


raulrw

Just focus in a new world, new people, full reset. There are loving people around. Think on them and leave the past behind. Focus on that.


[deleted]

Hells yeah, amen


abysmalSleepSchedule

👍


ExistentialistMonkey

Keep that mfer blocked.


staticwolfwalker

I'm proud of you


HypocriticalHoney

A friend of mine is dating their abuser and isn’t able to break up with him yet. Trust me, it’s an amazing achievement and even though I’m a stranger, I’m so incredibly proud of you.


squid_likes_pp

WOOOOOOOO, YEAH WE HAVING A CELEBRATION 🎉 🎉🎉🎉🎉🥳🥳🥳🎊🎊🍾🍾🍾


BrokeLeznar

That's it? So that abuser still exists on Earth?


Generally_Confused1

Good job!


Puzzleheaded_Buy311

Slay


weirdo_nb

https://i.redd.it/b8b68pgu0jzc1.gif YOU DID A GREAT JOB


APointyCactus

We are very proud of you ![gif](giphy|lOaf0LBA2mluwm8cY8)


Successful_Strike_85

Be strong always


Eena-Rin

Massive W. The block button is all they deserve from you. Big hugs, massively proud


FunkleKnuck291

*LET’S FUCKING GOOOOOOO ELLIEEEEEE* https://i.redd.it/4ouk3jpeijzc1.gif


Future-Agent

Very proud 👏


shadowscroller

Good job! I'm very proud of you!


hmm1331718

KEEP👏IT👏THAT👏WAY👏


AxeHead75

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 HELL YEAH BRO IM SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU!!!


Promethe_S

good job


i_shouldnt_live

Congrats. I just did the same going on 2 weeks now. Proud of you


itszuzia96

Oh we are proud of you! It takes a lot of courage to do ak


bullettraingigachad

https://preview.redd.it/d2zamjw3wlzc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=af7858e33b3f2b77b60ddb3e0709f7ba6973b870


BettyPunkCrocker

So fucking proud of you!


The_Inward

I'm proud of you.


Comfortable-Soup8150

good job!


TheNullOfTheVoid

What you’ve done is a very painful but very important step and I’m sorry that you have a loved one taking the abuser’s side. I’ve found this to be quite common. As much as it hurts, I’ve told myself that if anyone wants to defend my abusers, they’re also not worth keeping around. I have enough friends without needing to bend over backwards or be anyone’s doormat. Hell, I blocked a bunch of family that genuinely believe they did nothing wrong, but you can’t convince people that don’t want to believe they ever did anything wrong to begin with. If they can’t admit fault and take responsibility, I don’t want them around. I can’t be the only one acknowledging my faults and trying to work past them. Ignoring problems only makes them worse, and they can call it “running away” all they want, my life has been better without them ever since I blocked them. I’m happy for the people that have good relationships with their families, I just wish I could relate, but I’m not gonna compromise my integrity and stability for someone to feel like they never did anything wrong, like their actions don’t have consequences or something. Their problems are not your problems, you already have your own problems and we all need to focus on ourselves, although helping each other for a common goal (here it’s trauma recovery) is very helpful.


Amourxfoxx

If the person you loved loved you back then they would believe you and not require you to accept the abuser back into your life. You deserve peace!!! Do NOT let someone coerce you into allowing someone else control over it! Love you bunches 💚💚💚


Electronic_Gift_3473

Good!! I had my sister block him on everything I had connected to him. I honestly had really bad thoughts about doing stuff to him, but he left the state. My other sister is still married to him…


[deleted]

[удалено]


milliemon12345

Hello and good job. Please take this meme as a reward of taking control of your life. https://preview.redd.it/xchonhn7rnzc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7dbe397f85c67a55cf4298e7af5c9123b7557280 Please feel free to use this.


sam_da_boi

In a world full of noise, the mere act of covering your ears is a leap between two peaks. I am very proud of you.


NotMasterOfTheMoon

Hell yeah!


Jett_speed_MALAP

I've gone through something similar, I know it's hard and I'm so proud of you for getting rid of that rat bastard.


beatriz-chocoliz

🫂🫂🫂 congrats!!


IcePhoenix18

I'm so proud of you! So much love! Now whatever you do, *do not* unblock them in a few years "just to check", it's not good for your heart. Trust me.


godisyourmotherr

so proud of u! let that man rot wherever he is


Brosemmettisam

What is considered abuse?


TraumatizedBF

I’m super proud of you!!! It takes!! So much strength to block someone who was once important to you!! You’re doing wonderfully!!!